Title: One Hand, One Heart
Rating: T
Warning- indirect mention of rape.
Summary: Rachel Berry never saw it coming. But then it happened. Now, alone and frightened she tries to continue with normal life. Then she meets a certain, curly haired boy. And everything changes.
Disclaimer: Obviously I do not own Glee, if I did Jesse would still be there and St. Berry would be alive and kicking. But he isn't. From this we can conclude that I don't own Glee.
xxx
Rachel ran a nervous hand through her hair again, trying to smooth down the few stray hairs that fell over her face in an almost compulsive manor. The lighting in her room was harsh and bright, allowing her to see every flaw which her aunt was definitely going to point out. She ran another nervous hand through her hair, the other hand going to fiddle nervously with the harsh white collar which stuck out against the midnight blue of her cashmere jumper.
From behind her she heard the tinkling theme tune that told her she had received a new text, but she ignored it, knowing that it would Jesse. For the first time in a long while, she didn't want to talk to him. Strangely enough she had already started to depend on him. When her papa had told her that Jesse would be able to come around on Saturday night and have dinner with them it had given her a glimmer of hope that the upcoming weekend would not be as bad as she had previously thought. But upon calling him she had been told that he couldn't come over because he had promised to practice with Kurt.
Looking back she knew she reacted badly, she didn't know if it was the pregnancy hormones, or plain old defensiveness but she had ended up shouting at him and putting the phone down.
Now though, now she didn't have time to worry about him, despite how much she wanted to.
Downstairs a sudden, insistent knocking began, disrupting the peace of the house and Rachel sighed, trying to flatten her hair one last time before she hurried downstairs.
Hovering a few steps from the bottom, she watched warily as her aunt entered, already chastising her daddy, who was smiling with gritted teeth.
"Honestly, can't you answer the door when a woman knocks, I know this is hard for you to understand but really, it is not that difficult. When a woman knocks, she expects the door to be opened!"
"Sorry Veronica, I got there as fast as I could, can I take your coat?" Leroy answered quickly, holding out an arm towards his sister.
"Well you took your time asking," She snapped back, shoving her coat and bag into his arms and turning towards Rachel as her daddy stumbled away.
Rachel cast a quick panicked glance to her papa, who shrugged in apology.
"Ahh, there you are girl, well come on, where are your manners, welcome your aunt."
Unwillingly Rachel stepped forward, embracing her aunt with a strange delicacy, wincing a little as her pointed claws dug into Rachel's back. She was engulfed in a cloud of her aunt's strange perfume, a mixture of prunes and dust, the powder from her hair puffing out.
"Uh, hey Aunt Veronica, how are you?"
"I'm well," She stepped away. "Now show me to my room."
"Of course," She hesitated over the suitcases, one of the things her doctor had told her was to not lift heavy things and she was pretty sure that her aunt's suitcase was bigger than her. Her papa moved forward to get the suitcase, saying smoothly.
"I'll show you Veronica, Rachel, go and help your father with dinner."
As she fled into the kitchen, Rachel could hear her aunt from up the stairs, croaking indignantly. "You haven't even finished dinner yet? What have you been doing all day?"
Xxx
A few hours later, Rachel sat opposite her aunt, pushing the last few pieces of her desert around her plate, only half listening as her aunt interrogated Leroy.
"Rachel!"
Looking up she realised her aunt had addressed her and quickly schooled her expression into a smile. "Yes Aunt Veronica?"
"Well, how's school? Have you finally managed to get anywhere? Have you even managed to attract a man yet?"
She cringed at her aunt's bluntness and hurried to answer. "School's going wonderfully thank you, my grades are very good and I'm starting to think about exams."
"Well, it's about time," Her aunt sneered, "and what about a man, have you found one yet?"
"Well, yes I have a boyfriend, he's called Jesse."
"And where is he now? How very impolite, not greeting a new member of the family!" She shook her head angrily and Rachel suppressed a snigger as she watched small pieces of dandruff splatter onto her shoulders. Her aunt turned, with a furious expression, to her dads.
"How could you let her be around this boy, he's obviously no good for her!"
"No, he's lovely Aunt Veronica, he just had to rehearse tonight." Rachel protested.
"Rehearse for what?" Her aunt demanded, her eyes narrowing. When Rachel hesitated over her words realisation dawned.
"He's got these stupid Broadway ambitions too has he, how many times do I have to tell you Rachel? You'll never get onto Broadway, it's a stupid career choice for a girl who might just have enough brains to succeed in the world. You'll never get there, I don't know why you keep trying, keep rehearsing, there's no point and you're just wasting your life dreaming something that will never become a reality! You believe that this will happen so fiercely and when you get out there into the real world, you'll suddenly realise that you don't have any talent at all, that all you've dreamed is just some fanciful nonsense cooked up by a naive little girl!"
"No… I…" Rachel could feel the tears pooling in her eyes.
"How many times do I have to tell you? Let it go, there's a whole world out there that you're missing because of your stupid dreaming!"
They all flinched as a resounding crash echoed from behind them, turning, they peered around each other to see that Leroy was leaning down to pick up shattered pieces of china. Aunt Veronica immediately began chastising him and Rachel glanced at her papa and was surprised to see him motioning towards the door. She needed no further encouragement and silently slipped from the room, going upstairs and shutting her door quietly behind her. Leaning back on it she took a long, deep breath and let one tear slip from her eyes and trail slowly down her face.
Falling onto her bed, she reluctantly picking up her phone and keyed in his number without thinking.
"Rache?" He picked up immediately.
"I'm sorry," She spluttered and his tone became more concerned.
"For what? What's wrong?"
"For shouting at you, it was mean of me," She explained, falteringly.
"What?" He asked again, sounding slightly less panicked. "No you don't have to apologise Rache, I understand. What happened?"
"Oh just my aunt, you don't need to worry about coming round any more though."
"Why not?"
"She has officially decided she doesn't like you because you didn't come around tonight and greet her." Rachel rolled her eyes, grabbing a fluffy cushion and hugging it close to her chest.
"Huh… I suppose that's… fair?"
"Not at all, but that's life." She laughed a little.
"Well, your aunt seems like a joy and, as much as I would love to sit and chat to you all night, I've got some stuff to be getting on with, I'll talk to you later yeah?"
"Sounds good," She smiled. "It's a date."
"Love you."
"Love you too."
She sighed as she clicked the phone shut and, after a moment, reached out to grab the small glass trophy from her most recent conquest in the singing world and clutched it tightly to her chest, eventually falling into a fitful slumber.
Xxx
It was late Saturday evening when Jesse's phone next rang. He was half way through warming up with Kurt, leaning against the boy's small piano and singing runs with him when his phone started buzzing madly. Glancing down, he saw Rachel's name and his eyes widened a little, casting Kurt an apologetic smile and stepping away as he answered.
"Hey,"
"Are you free, please say you're free?" She sounded strangely excited.
"What? Rache?" He frowned a little, missing the way Kurt rolled his eyes.
"I got out of it!"
"Got out of what?" He asked, still trying to hear her properly as he pressed his free hand to his other ear.
"Dinner with my vicious, manipulative aunt silly! I told her I had a study group." She seemed completely high on the idea.
"Well, I can't I have to practice with Kurt. Try Quinn?" He suggested.
"Oh," The sudden fall in her voice was almost devastating and he sighed as the guilt seeped through his veins. "I already tried her, she's with Puck. It's fine, I'll just tell my aunt the study group was cancelled."
"Rache-" He tried, hating the way her voice lacked the excitement and energy from earlier.
"No, it's fine," She insisted unconvincingly and then added, her voice low. "Have a nice night."
He went to argue, but was met with only the dialling tone. Sighing he shoved the phone in his pocket and turned back to Kurt, who was texting someone on his own sleek Blackberry.
"More Rachel problems?" Kurt asked, rising one eyebrow.
"Yeah, I kind of left her hanging this time though." He shook his head, trying to forget about Rachel. "Shall we?" He gestured to the waiting pile of books.
Kurt nodded eagerly and together they began rehearsing through their prospective song choices. However, it was easy to see that Jesse's mind was elsewhere and finally Kurt slammed his book shut, sighing loudly.
"Look," He said, trying to keep the anger out of his voice. "Just go and make up with her and come back tomorrow when you are actually ready to practice okay?"
Jesse gave him a weak smile, already half way through pulling his jacket on as Kurt spoke. "Thanks Kurt, I'll make it up to you," He promised, leaving the house quickly.
Kurt sighed and grabbed his phone, evacuating to his boudoir and lying heavily on the mountain of velvet cushions.
"What up?" Mercedes answered almost immediately.
"Mercedes, it's me." Kurt answered.
"Hey, how's operation Jesse going?"
"Not good," Kurt complained.
"How so?" Mercedes demanded.
"He will not stop thinking about Rachel."
"Whoa," Mercedes shook her head a little, looking up from sifting through her magazine. "That girl must seriously have done something to him because there aren't many guys that can't stop thinking about Rachel Berry."
Xxx
Sitting at her desk, skimming through old MySpace posts, Rachel couldn't seem to settle. She drifted from doing one thing to another, unable to commit as the night wore on. She sighed a little as the video she was watching came to an end and was just beginning to contemplate just turning in for the night when a light, irregular tapping started.
Frowning, she got up and looked around, searching for the source of the sound as she made her way towards her window, her eyes widening when she realised someone was through gravel at it.
Hurrying now, she peered out of it first and, when unable to see anything, pushed it open slowly, poking her head out and calling, in a faltering voice.
"Who's there? I carry a rape whistle you know!"
"Easy," A quiet voice from below her made her jump, glancing down to see an easily recognisable figure shrouded in darkness. "I come in peace."
"Jesse?" She hissed.
"Were you expecting someone else?"
She rolled her eyes and tried to suppress the smile attempting to push her lips apart, chastising him softly. "Do you know quite how cliché this is?"
"Does it bother you?" He responded.
"No," She laughed a little and stepped back, watching with growing alarm as he climbed up the pergola beneath her window, her eyes widening as he held out his hands towards her.
"What…?" She trailed off, her eyebrows furrowing as she stared questioningly at him.
"What, did you think I was going to risk bumping into your aunt?" He grinned, grabbing one of her hands and asking, playfully. "You ready?"
"Wait Jesse-"
It was too late, he'd already grabbed her window sill and slung himself into the room with uncommon awkwardness, stumbling over his feet and falling into her, pushing them both onto the bed.
She giggled and he smiled at her, his eyes suddenly smouldering as he pushed upwards, so that his body was just hovering over hers and pressing against her.
Heat swept up her neck, causing a quick flush to colour her cheeks as he leant down to ravish her neck with quick fiery kisses. A gasp caught in her throat and she pushed him away, wheeling away from under him to swing the window shut. Turning back, she found him lying on her bed, patting the space beside him invitingly. She willingly went to him, going to lie beside him and leant up next to him, asking.
"Did your rehearsal finish this early?"
"No," He replied, then met her eyes with a soft expression. "But I couldn't let you suffer."
She smiled and then her eyebrows shot up. "I'm guessing Kurt wasn't best pleased?"
"Probably not but…" He moved closer to her again, pushing her back gently until her back hit the soft comforter and he went to hover over her again. "I'm sure he'll get over it." He murmured, before pressing his lips down on hers. She returned the kiss with just as much passion, her hands tangling in his hair as their bodies met with a tingle of fervour that was so great you could almost taste it in the air.
Gasping, Rachel moved away, sucking in much needed air as Jesse moved to kiss down her throat again. She breathed out a heavy sigh of pleasure and his hands slipped down to rest on her thighs, tingles shooting through her skin. Her mind was heavy , clouded by the scent of him. It was as if each touch was electric, every nerve standing on edge and each sensation tangible. His lips met her again and she strained to pull him closer still, craving his touch on her as if it were oxygen. A strange need filled her and she groaned softly into his mouth as their lips fought for dominance, his forehead occasional brushing hers, making her shiver with excitement.
"Rachel!" The shrill cry wasn't far away and she gasped, breaking away from him as he began to kiss down her arms now.
"Stop a second," She managed to whisper and he looked up, her arm still in his grip, his hair dishevelled and his eyes wide.
"Rachel?" The cry came again and now that she listened closer she could hear the thudding footsteps as her aunt ascended the stairs.
"Quickly!" She pushed him off the bed hurriedly, pushing him into the bathroom and shutting the door as her aunt barged in.
"What in the world were you doing up here?" Her aunt snapped, gazing over her messy clothing and the wrinkled bed sheets.
"Oh, I, uh, fell asleep on the bed," Rachel forced out a laugh, although her heart was pounding so hard that she was certain her aunt could hear it.
"Careless," Her aunt muttered, before saying. "I just came in to tell you that I'm going to bed and not to disturb me, understood?"
"Of course," Rachel answered quickly and her aunt sniffed with irritation and waddled back out again. "Goodnight to you too," Rachel muttered, pushing the door shut and going to the bathroom, opening up the door quickly and looking in.
Jesse glanced up at her, smiling when he met her nerve stricken gaze. Moving swiftly, he embraced her in a quick hug and bent down to murmur in her ear. "Too close?"
"Way too close," She agreed, pulling away a little.
"Next time," He promised, leading her back towards the bed and sitting down on it with her. "When we're alone."
"I'll hold you to that," she muttered, although secretly she felt a slight thrill at the thought of next time.
Xxx
Indeed, thine eyes do not deceive you! (I'm pretty sure that isn't correct :/) What I mean to say is yes, this is the second update in the same number of days… yay.
However, this is sort of an 'I'm sorry' chapter as well, because after today there is a three week stretch until I can post again: I know, disaster!
On a side note, however, I will be able to write a lot this holiday and also, this holiday will greet the one year anniversary of the story… another yay. Yes, it's been a year since I started (on and off) writing this story. Which is sort of depressing because I was hoping it'd be done by now and it is far from it but… what can you do?
We got past 300 reviews guys! northstar61 was the 300th reviewer by the way… in case you care.
A quick note: There's this thing that I've been playing around with for a while, I'm thinking off doing a story with 100 one shot chapters, each inspired by one word. I have a list of words that I've got from various places and been given by people. If anyone's interested and would read it give me a shout, I'm really quite taken with the idea and I think I'm going to go for it.
Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter: twilight2892, northstar61, likewow556, nanuvamp, Kkaty, TVHollywoodDiva , auhaes55, LNCrow, StBerry Lover24, SeaSerpent, Missbroadwayboundfanfic and AlexisLovesGlee!
Okay… hope you all enjoyed your previews!
Looking forward to getting back to at least 10 reviews… please? I'm just so demanding. ;)
Love
Ray
xxx