"Ahhhhhhhh! Take that, King Yemma!" A group of rebelling ogres screamed as they threw a large amount of office supplies into Bloody Lake.
"Guys, can't you think of anything more creative…?" Cell sweat dropped. "Throwing out stationary is hardly rebelling."
"Yes it is! King Yemma likes everything organised!" One of the ogres argued.
"And look – this is his to-do list!" Another grinned, holding a sheet of paper up.
"'To-do list'?" Cell repeated. "What does he need to do besides sorting out souls?"
"Maintenance! This is a list of all the stuff that needs maintaining down here." The ogre replied, scrunching the list into a ball. "Ha!" He threw the list into Bloody Lake, and he and his brothers cheered triumphantly as it became too stained to read.
"Okay, great." Cell yawned. "Now how about you do some real damage? Like those guys," He nodded over to a group of ogres in the distance, who had teamed up with a group of saiyans and were blowing up various parts of Hell and killing any guards that were still loyal to King Yemma and trying to stop them.
"That's better?" The ogres asked, looking at Cell.
"Yeah, that's better. Come on, I'll show you how it's done." Cell replied, and was about to take off to teach the ogres how to destroy Hell, when a voice interrupted him.
"Excuse me, Cell?"
"Hm?"
Cell turned round to see a saiyan woman standing there. He recognised her… wasn't she…? "Gine?" Cell uttered in surprise. "You're Goku's mother, right?"
"Yes, I am." Gine nodded. "I'd like to join in your rebellion, if that's okay?"
"What?" Cell frowned. "But I heard you were against rioting."
"Well, normally I am…" Gine replied. "But this is different – I'm not rebelling as a criminal now, I'm rebelling as a mother."
"I don't understand what you mean." Cell said.
"Cell – I heard why these ogres are rebelling. The way their father treats them is just horrible, and as a mother myself I can't stand by and let that happen!" Gine huffed. "So – let me join you."
"Uh…" Cell sweat dropped, shocked that she actually wanted to team up with him. After all… "You do know that I was the one that killed your son, right?"
"Yes." Gine hissed, looking away in annoyance. "And Frieza killed my husband, and enslaved Raditz…" She looked at Cell. "This isn't a permanent alliance, let me make that clear! Bardock and I are still your enemies, but on this occasion I'm willing to let that slide for the sake of mothers and children everywhere!" She looked at Cell sternly, her face suddenly changing as a look of determination swept across it, giving her a striking resemblance to Goku. "This isn't just a riot, it's a movement that will change history!"
"… Yeah, whatever." Cell snorted. Tch. Whatever… He didn't really care who got involved in this, so long as he got the result he wanted. And the more the merrier, right? "Fine, you can join me." Cell shrugged. "Just make sure you do what I say – and don't let anyone take King Yemma's side!"
"Of course I won't!" Gine frowned. "Let's go!" She took off into the air, followed by Cell and the rebellious ogres.
XXXXX
Back in his office, King Yemma slammed his fist down onto his desk in annoyance, almost splitting its wood.
"How dare they!" He boomed. "They're not supposed to team up with the convicts! Who's leading them?"
"Cell, Sir." His ogre assistant replied.
"I told you." Fortune-teller Baba sniped.
"I know!" King Yemma yelled. "Listen – we'll have to bring in someone to calm things down," He looked at his assistant. "Can you round up Heaven's best warriors?"
"Yes, Sir!" The ogre nodded, and flew off to find some heroes in Otherworld.
"Baba, you should go home until this is resolved." King Yemma stated. "You don't want to get caught in the riot."
"Fine…" Baba sighed, disappointed. She'd planned to go and visit Babidi… She had been looking forward to it, but she didn't fancy the idea of getting caught up in that riot – she didn't like Babidi that much. "Tell me when it's over." Baba said, and flew out of King Yemma's office and headed for home, unaware of the demon king that was waiting for her there.
XXXXX
Meanwhile, over at Fortune-teller Baba's castle, King Piccolo was mere seconds away from destroying the building and everyone inside.
"I won't tell you again!" He roared, his ki soaring. "Bring Baba out here!"
"She's not here!" Baba's ghost usher protested. "She's in King Yemma's office. Why do you want her anyway?"
"She has to take me to Hell!" King Piccolo barked. "Unless you're going to do it?"
"Oh… okay." The ghost nodded.
"What?" King Piccolo blinked, calming down a little. He looked at the ghost usher in surprise. "You can take me?"
"Yes." The ghost replied, and lifted up his straw hat to reveal a small bottle of dark liquid. "Here, drink this." He said, holding the bottle out to King Piccolo. "It's poison. You'll be in Hell in ten minutes."
"Wha – no!" King Piccolo screamed. "I don't want to die, you idiot! I just want to visit!"
"Oh." The ghost replied, putting the bottle away. "Not allowed."
"It is too!" King Piccolo argued.
"Not." The ghost huffed stubbornly.
"Yes it is." King Piccolo hissed, his eyes glowing demonically. "If I say it's allowed, then it's –"
"Oh, what's going on?"
"Baba!"
King Piccolo spun around at the sound of Fortune-teller Baba's voice behind him, and she let out a loud yelp as he grabbed her. "Take me to Hell – now!"
"Eep! Get off me!" Baba wailed, trying to break out of his grasp. "I can't take you to Hell – it's forbidden!"
"Oh shut up, you go there all the time!" King Piccolo snarled.
"Yes, I go there, but I have permission." Baba replied arrogantly. "You don't. … Hm." She looked at King Piccolo, noticing a slight haziness in his eyes, and she sniffed. "… Have you been drinking?"
"No!" King Piccolo growled. "Just take me to Hell!"
"What do you want to go there for?" Fortune-teller Baba huffed. "There's a riot, it's very dangerous. I even had to cancel my date with Babidi."
"A riot?" King Piccolo uttered. What…? Oh, that was perfect! The place was already filled with mayhem and violence – he had to go now!
"So there's no way I'm going down there." Baba continued. "A young woman like me would make the perfect hostage for those criminals – aii!" She let out a scream as King Piccolo tightened his grip on her, holding his arm across her throat as he snarled into her face,
"You are taking me." King Piccolo said. "Otherwise I'm going to kill you and destroy your castle."
"If you do that, I'll tell on you." The ghost usher said.
"You won't have time, I'll kill you first!" King Piccolo barked. He looked down at Baba. "So?"
Baba whimpered slightly, becoming worried. Well… ordinarily Frikiza could keep him under control, right? But… she wasn't here, and he was drunk… he might just be stupid enough to keep his word. Aii!
"Fine!" Fortune-teller Baba shrieked. "But I have conditions."
"I'm not interested in your conditions!" King Piccolo snapped.
"Well then I'm not taking you – aii!" She let out another scream as King Piccolo once again tightened his grip. "Okay – fine! But listen," She pulled away from him, and looked at the demon king. "I was supposed to have my date my Babidi, and if I'm going to Hell anyway, I want to see him."
"Fine." King Piccolo shrugged. "That's not my concern."
"Well, it is – you have to guarantee that nobody attacks us in the riot!" Baba frowned. "You have to guard his cave – and guard us! After all, you will need me to come back to Earth."
"Hmph." King Piccolo grunted. She had a point. If anything happened to her in the riot, he would be stuck in Hell…" Fine." King Piccolo said. "I'll get on of the boys to guard you."
"What!" Baba cried. "You never said you wanted me to take your kids as well! This isn't a family outing, you know! I'm not supposed to even take you at all, I'm only doing it because I've become the victim of kidnapping and coercion!"
"Ha." King Piccolo smirked, amused at her phrasing. Well… he was bullying her into this, wasn't he? It was such a shame for her. "I meant the boys that are down there. I'm having a reunion."
"… Oh." Fortune-teller Baba uttered, and looked at him sceptically. "You mean you're going to visit those monsters that terrorised the Earth hundreds of years ago?"
"Yes." King Piccolo nodded, his face lighting up in enthusiasm.
"… Are you going to cause trouble?" Baba frowned.
"Of course." King Piccolo nodded, even more gleeful.
"… Oh – no, I can't!" Baba huffed, backing away. "You doing seem to be taking me into consideration here. If I take you to Hell, then I'm responsible for whatever you do down there! We already have Cell's gang and the saiyans rioting – King Yemma will flip if I let your monsters join in as well!"
"But you just said so yourself, you're the victim of coercion." King Piccolo insisted. "Just tell him that you had no choice, because I was going to kill you if you didn't." He stepped towards her and looked down at her menacingly. "And believe me… I will."
Fortune-teller Baba shivered a little, intimidated by his stare. He could certainly be scary when Frikiza wasn't around… … But why did he even want to go to Hell anyway?
"You have a baby on the way. You should be at home taking care of your wife." Baba lectured. "Not running round Hell causing trouble. You need to grow up and learn some responsib – aii!" She yelped loudly as she was once again physically assaulted by King Piccolo. He grabbed her and clasped his hand around her throat, turning her neck slightly and threatening to break it.
"She doesn't need taking care of!" King Piccolo yelled. "Do you have any idea how horrible it is living with a pregnant woman? I'm just about ready to destroy Earth, and if you don't let me cause mayhem in Hell then I'll do it up here! Do you understand?"
"Wh-What?" Baba gasped. "So what, is this some kind of stress relief for you?"
"Yes!" King Piccolo screamed. "Frikiza has been getting her own way for far too long! It's baby this, baby that, do this, do that, and she doesn't even put out! Don't you understand how selfish that is?"
"Uh-huh…" Fortune-teller Baba sweat dropped. Oh, great… Since when was she a therapist? She didn't recall asking to hear about his marital problems!
"And the boys have all taken her side!" King Piccolo snarled, his eyes burning with anger. "The useless little traitors… I could kill all of them! I should slit open their throats for what they've done to me – and that bitch Kuria! She's living with us too, and she's just as bad as her mother – both of them are selfish ugly bitches!"
"C-Careful…" Baba choked as King Piccolo started to strangle her in his anger.
"Tch…" King Piccolo grunted, releasing his grip just enough for Fortune-teller Baba to breathe, but still tight enough to hurt her. "Do you see the situation I'm in?" He growled. "I think I deserve a day to myself, don't you? After all I've done for those weak, good-for-nothing traitors, just to get nothing back… the least I deserve is to do whatever I want for one – single – measly day!"
"Well, everybody needs their own time –"
"Precisely!" King Piccolo screamed, and glared down at Baba. "So it's up to you. Either you take me to Hell and I fuck stuff up down there, or I'm going to start destroying Planet Earth, starting with you and your castle!" He exhaled fiercely, his hot alcohol-stained breath almost burning Baba's face. "What will it be?"
"… Let's go to Hell." Baba whimpered.
"Good!" King Piccolo barked, and instantly released her.
"But I want protection from the riot – and actually," Fortune-teller Baba looked at King Piccolo. "Since Babidi's had his powers revoked he's been getting bullied by the other cons, and he isn't strong enough to protect himself…" She sniffed, suddenly becoming overly dramatic and putting herself on the verge of crying. "Oh, I don't know what I'd do if anything were to happen to him…"
"Do you want a permanent bodyguard for him?" King Piccolo snorted, immediately seeing through her victim act.
"Well, yes." Baba nodded, returning to normal. "If you don't mind? I am doing you a big favour, after all."
"Sure, he can have one of the boys." King Piccolo shrugged. "Let's go."
"Alright!" Fortune-teller Baba grinned. "This way. I made a shortcut." And started to lead him into her castle.
XXXXX
"Stop! That is an order!"
"Never!" Gine huffed, fighting back the ogres that were still loyal to King Yemma as they attempted to restrain her. "How can you still be on his side, after the way he treats you?"
"King Yemma told us never to listen to the cons!" One of the ogres argued, grabbing Gine. "Now you go to jail – arrgh!" He cried out as a ki blast suddenly sent him and his companions flying through the air.
Gine looked up to see Cell standing there, having just blown her attackers away.
"Thank you…" Gine uttered sheepishly.
"No problem." Cell snorted, and looked at her. "For a saiyan, you kind of suck at fighting."
"Well… I was never very good." Gine sweat dropped. "I used to fight alongside my husband, but he would always end up saving me from trouble, so I quit fighting and worked at a meat factory – actually when I left to go on maternity leave, my boss gave me a meat hamper."
"Really?" Cell uttered. "That was nice of him."
"Well… childbirth takes it out of you, after all." Gine smiled.
"I never found it so hard." Cell frowned. "And I made seven." He pointed up at his six wild children, who were in their element causing mayhem.
"Papa! Papa, look at me!"
"Look what I'm doing!" The Cell Juniors called to him as they followed in their father's footsteps and destroyed their surroundings.
"That's great, Kids!" Cell exclaimed. "Keep it up!"
"Um… I think you're missing one…" Gine commented, counting the Juniors.
"No – Seven's at home. He's kind of a loner." Cell replied. "Actually… sometimes I worry about him. He never seems to want to get involved with family time."
"I wouldn't worry about it. Raditz went through a phrase like that when I was pregnant with Kakarot." Gine replied. "Sometimes they find it difficult to adjust to a change in the family, you just need to be patient and give them space. Eventually they'll come around –"
"Hey!"
Gine and Cell looked up to see King Vegeta and Turnipa standing there, both of them looking infuriated.
"Y-Your Majesties!" Gine gasped, throwing herself to the floor. "How can I serve you?"
"Ew…" Turnipa gagged, and pushed her husband towards Gine. "You talk to her, I just washed."
"What? You think I want to catch low-class germs?" King Vegeta growled.
"Just tell her!" Turnipa barked.
King Vegeta snorted, and looked at Gine and Cell.
"I order you to stop what you're doing and end this riot at once!" He demanded.
"What?" Cell frowned. "Why?"
"Yes… Sire – with respect, I thought you would approve of a riot?" Gine uttered.
"Well normally, yes. However!" King Vegeta glared at her. "This riot is in favour of a cause that I cannot support – so I am ordering you to stop it now."
"But – Sire, you must be mistaken." Gine replied. "We're doing this riot to put an end to child cruelty, and to grant the ogres freedom from their father."
"Precisely." King Vegeta replied.
"Child cruelty should never be abolished!" Turnipa huffed, folding her arms. "And we won't stand for a movement that tries to do that!"
"What?" Gine gasped, her eyes widening in shock. "But – I don't understand, Your Majesties. You have two children of your own."
"Yeah, we know. We can count." King Vegeta grunted, hiding his shock as he thought to himself, "There were two?"
"Of course we have children! That's how we know what horrible things they are!" Turnipa protested. "If anything, people should be even more cruel to them – so there's no way I'm letting you continue with this riot!"
"But –"
"That is a direct order." King Vegeta snarled, cutting Gine off. He raised his hand up to her and started to form a ki ball in his palm. "And if you so much as think about disobeying it, you will be classed as a traitor and executed –"
He stopped suddenly when Cell stepped in front of Gine, and glared fiercely at the saiyan king.
"Leave her alone." Cell said coldly. "Or you'll be the ones executed." He stepped forward and grabbed King Vegeta's hand, pushing his palm into King Vegeta's until the ki ball dispersed with seemingly no effort. King Vegeta's eyes widened as he watched Cell absorb the attack, and he stared up into Cell's eyes. "This riot is continuing." Cell snarled. "So you either join us, or you get out of my sight before I erase you from existence."
"Oh yeah?" King Vegeta snarled back. "And what makes you think you can do that?"
"The fact that I have a greater power level than Frieza." Cell replied, narrowing his eyes at King Vegeta. "And he took you out in one hit, right?"
"… Crap." King Vegeta uttered, suddenly remembering that Cell was actually more powerful than Frieza. "I forgot about that."
He glanced at his wife, then back at Cell. "Well… you're in luck." King Vegeta snorted arrogantly. "We have some business to attend to, so as it happens we need to leave. Just… stop rioting." He took a step back, and then he and Turnipa suddenly bolted away as fast as they could.
"Idiots." Cell grunted, staring after them.
"They're such cruel parents…" Gine sighed. "I feel sorry for their children."
"No wonder Vegeta never amounted to anything." Cell nodded, folding his arms in disapproval.
XXXXX
Meanwhile, in the demon section of Hell, a giant portal appeared amongst a group of demons, and they scurried away to a safe distance as they felt a dark energy emerging from it. King Piccolo stepped out of the portal, accompanied by Fortune-teller Baba, and he looked around.
"Are we there?" He asked.
"Yes. See, I told you it was a shortcut." Baba said boastfully. "When I stated seeing Babidi, I made this handy little portal. It cuts my travel time by half."
"Uh-huh…" King Piccolo uttered. He turned his head to the crowd of demons that were looking at him curiously, and spoke, "You guys! Do you know where the children of King Piccolo live?" He watched as the demons nodded, and continued, "Can you take me to them?"
"We will." One of the demons replied. "In exchange for your human."
"What?" Fortune-teller Baba shrieked, darting behind King Piccolo. "No! Get away from me – I'm not payment!"
"Her blood smells fresh…" One of the demons grinned, licking his lips thirstily.
"No – I can assure you, it's not fresh! I'm very old!" Baba insisted. "Honestly – if you want someone, take him! He's nice and young!" She attempted to push King Piccolo towards them, but he just stood solid as a rock, glaring at the demons.
"You're going to take me to them." King Piccolo snarled. "Or I'll destroy you."
"No!" The demons pouted.
"Prove it!" One of them frowned.
"Fine." King Piccolo shrugged, and proceeded to fire a small blast at one of the demons, which erased his existence in a flash.
The remaining demons' eyes widened, and they gulped.
"Who is this guy…?" One of them whispered to his companions.
"Oh – fuck, is this actually King Piccolo?" Another gasped.
"Shit!" The remaining demons yelped, staring at the demon king with wide eyes. "I think it is!"
"Better do as he says, otherwise Number One will flip."
"Uh-huh…"
The demons looked at King Piccolo, and grinned sheepishly. "Right this way, Sir."
"Would you like a drink?" One of them offered, holding up a cup of murky water that looked as if it had come from a sewer.
"Sure." King Piccolo shrugged, taking the cup.
"Ugh! You're not actually going to drink that –" Fortune-teller Baba's face twisted in disgust as she watched King Piccolo gulp down the bacteria-ridden water. "… You are." She sighed. "You're disgusting."
"Do you have any chocolate?" King Piccolo asked the demons.
"Do we look like we earn chocolate?" One of them sarcastically replied.
XXXXX
Back on Earth, Frikiza stepped outside where her stepchildren were lightly sparring, after taking her second bath that day.
"Do you feel better now?" Piano asked, approaching her with a drink.
"Not really…" Frikiza sighed. She sat down and stroked her midsection, which was now twice the size it had been that morning. "I don't get it… I was this size when Kuria was born." She looked at Piano. "How big are namek eggs?"
"Uh…" Piano sweat dropped, recalling the eggs of his younger siblings. Actually, they were almost as big as Frikiza – there was no way she could carry one of those things in her body! And she certainly wouldn't be able to push it out at its full size, even if she did stretch… "Well… I'm sure he'll come out before he's that big." Piano said, and laughed nervously.
"What!" Frikiza shirked, her eyes widening. "Piano – how big are they?"
"Well… Look – I don't want to worry you…" Piano said nervously. "But… you might need a caesarean."
"What!" Frikiza cried. "Really? How big? Show me."
Piano hesitated, not wanting to make Frikiza any more nervous than she already was.
"I'm sure it'll be fine." Piano assured. "He'll stop growing any minute now –"
"Piano." Frikiza said sternly. "Show me."
"…" Piano paused for a long moment, then finally let out a sigh. "Very well." He mumbled. "But remember – Bass won't be this big." He opened his arms out, and started to demonstrate the size of his siblings' eggs. "Tambourine was this size, and Cymbal… well, he was bigger, so he was like this. Then Drum… he's quite a stocky one – his egg grew to this size, and Junior…" He looked in dismay at the expression of fear that was steadily dominating Frikiza's face. "Now – don't panic! This is the egg size remember? And they were born fully grown, but Bass will only be a little baby." Piano insisted. "He'll be much smaller."
"Well, how big was Junior when he hatched?" Frikiza asked worriedly.
"Oh – very little. Just like this." Piano replied, and used his hands to show what seemed to be a normal sized baby.
"Okay…" Frikiza sighed, a little relieved. "Well… maybe he won't grow much now. It's just that the last three months are supposed to be the growing period, but… Bass seems to have done that already."
"Well, he must be doing things differently to other babies." Piano nodded. "I'm sure he won't get any bigger now – perhaps he'll use the next three months to learn language. After all, when we were born we could all speak right away –"
He suddenly stopped talking when a splashing sound came from Frikiza, and Piano moved his eyes down to see her peeing. "Um…" He sweat dropped. "I'll… pretend I didn't see that." Aw… He felt kind of embarrassed for her. Piano had read about pregnancy – when Frikiza had become pregnant Piano had read all sorts of literature on the different trimesters and birthing methods, and as well as learning about caesareans he'd also read that a pregnant woman's bladder was a little more difficult to control… It must be quite an awkward position to be in.
"Oh my God…" Frikiza whimpered, her eyes widening. "No – Piano, I'm not peeing!"
"I know! I didn't see anything, I promise!" Piano insisted.
"No – it's my waters!" Frikiza cried, jumping up. "My waters broke!"
"Wh-What!" Piano gasped, his eyes widening. Wait – didn't water coming out mean…? "But – but it's not time!" Piano protested. "He's too early –"
"Ow!" Frikiza shouted in pain and squatted down, clutching her midsection as a sharp, heavy pain shot through it. "Piano…"
"Crap!" Piano shrieked, in fully panic mode. "Crap crap crap crap!"
"Hey, what's going on?"
After hearing the commotion, Tambourine, Cymbal and Drum all gathered around Frikiza.
"Are you okay?" Tambourine asked.
"The baby's coming!" Piano yelled frantically.
"What?" Cymbal blinked.
"The baby's coming!" Piano repeated as Frikiza let out another painful groan.
"What does that mean?" Drum questioned.
"The baby's coming!" Piano screamed, frantically jumping into the air.
"What – you mean right now?" Tambourine blinked.
"Yes!" Piano wailed.
"But – it's not time!" Cymbal protested.
"I know!" Piano snarled.
"We should tell King Piccolo." Drum said.
"Yes – good idea – and one of you go and grab Kuria." Piano panted. "Frikiza, it'll be alright!" He grabbed Frikiza's hands, his heart racing wildly as he attempted to say something reassuring. "Just calm down – don't worry. Everything's under control!"
"Get… get Zarba." Frikiza huffed. "Tell Kuria to call her."
"Frikiza…" Piano laughed nervously, in a vain attempt to conceal his panic. "Shouldn't we try calling your midwife first?"
"Zarba is my midwife." Frikiza replied.
"What?"
XXXXX
Meanwhile, over in Hell, King Piccolo and Fortune-teller Baba were following their escorts through the demon section.
"Is it much further…?" Baba whimpered, looking round. "This place is giving me the creeps."
"Here." One of the demon escorts said, stopping outside a large castle. He approached the door and rang the bell, sending an eerie chiming through the demon land.
"Eep!" Baba shrieked, darting behind King Piccolo. "Why did you bring me here! This is terrifying!"
"Huh." King Piccolo uttered, ignoring Baba as he looked up at the castle. They'd done pretty well for themselves, considering they'd not had him to lead them. In all the years King Piccolo had been in Hell, he'd never come to visit the army of monsters he'd created in his prime. He'd been too obsessed with watching Goku and planning his revenge… But maybe he should have come to live here; it was a much more comfortable environment than that cave he'd shared with those four useless freaks. Hm.
After a short while the castle door creaked open, and out stepped a creature that looked like Piano.
"Yes?" He answered impatiently.
"We have a visitor for you." The demon escorts said.
"Hm?" The Piano lookalike grunted, and moved his eyes to King Piccolo… and then he let out a loud gasp. "K-King Piccolo!" He cried, immediately throwing himself at his master's feet with tears in his eyes. "You came back, Sire! Oh, I knew you would! Welcome! Welcome!"
"Whatever." King Piccolo grunted, kicking the mutant off him. Now he remembered why he'd never visited these guys – they were a bunch of freaks! And they barely had a brain between them. In his prime King Piccolo had been so keen to fill the Earth with demons he'd spat out egg after egg, barely putting any effort into their creation whatsoever. As a result, his mass-produced children were a bunch of morons – strong, but stupid. The first fifty or so were okay, as far as King Piccolo could recall… but after that they were pretty much brain-dead, and a lot of them dribbled. "Are your brothers home?" King Piccolo asked.
"Yes! Yes, of course!" The mutant nodded, rising to his feet. He moved back towards the castle, then looked up at it and yelled, "Number One! King Piccolo's here!"
"King Piccolo!" A thousand excited voices called from the castle.
"Wha – aiii!" Fortune-teller Baba screamed as an army of demons suddenly flooded out from all the doors and windows of the castle, each of them looking like Tambourine, Cymbal or Drum.
Baba grabbed hold of King Piccolo for comfort and watched in horror as the mutants surrounded them, kneeling before their master.
"Welcome!" They cried. "Welcome home!"
"Hello, my children!" King Piccolo grinned, his eyes glowing in delight as he was finally reunited with his army. "It's so good to –"
"Welcome!" The mutants continued on, all speaking out of sync with each other. "Welcome, King Piccolo, welcome!"
"Thank you…" King Piccolo uttered, steadily losing his patience. "So, here's what I want you to do –"
"Welcome!" The mutants continued, seemingly unaware that their master was speaking. "Welcome, King Piccolo! Welcome welcome –"
"Silence!" King Piccolo screamed, finally silencing the over-excited mutants. He let out a frustrated sigh, and once again attempted to speak. "Now –"
"Ssh!" The mutants shushed each other fiercely. "Listen to King Piccolo! Ssh! Listen, listen! Ssh –"
"Shut up!" King Piccolo roared, his ki soaring as his patience ran out. "Shut up or I'll destroy every last one of you!
"Destroy…" The mutants repeated, their eyes glowing. "Destroy… Destroy!"
"Yes…" King Piccolo sighed. Dammit. They were even more retarded than he remembered. "Just – tell me, who's your leader?"
"King Piccolo!" The mutants declared.
"I mean your leader down here." King Piccolo growled impatiently. Dammit! This was looking more and more like a bad idea. Maybe he should just destroy the lot of them and start a riot of his own.
"Number One!" The mutants started calling, once again all out of sync with each other. "Number One Number One Number One –"
"Silence!" A voice that wasn't King Piccolo's put an end to the gormless chanting.
King Piccolo looked up as the crowd of mutants started to part, allowing someone to step through. It was another of King Piccolo's mutant children; he looked exactly like Tambourine except he wore a crown with King Piccolo's symbol carved into it. King Piccolo vaguely remembered this one… it was the first child he had ever made – and therefore the most intelligent.
"Son…?" King Piccolo uttered quietly as the mutant leader approached him. He looked different to the others… He seemed more alert, and he definitely had a higher IQ. King Piccolo had actually put a little effort into making him. Number One stared at King Piccolo for a long moment, and then a wide grin swept over his face, covering the parts of his skull that weren't already dominated by his wide mouth.
"Daddy!" Number One wailed, and threw himself at King Piccolo.
"Hey –" King Piccolo flinched as the mutant wrapped his arms around his master, squeezing him tight.
"King Piccolo! I knew you'd come back for us!" Number One cried. "The others said you were a deadbeat that walked out on us, but I knew you'd return!"
"Uh…" The other mutants sweat dropped. "No, no…" They mumbled quietly, their small minds trying desperately to think of something to say that wouldn't make them sound disloyal.
"Get off me!" King Piccolo growled, pushing Number One away. "I'm not staying, you idiot! I just want to cause mayhem down here to take my mind off my wife."
"Oh – Queen Frikiza!" Number One nodded enthusiastically. "We've been watching her – on the picture box!"
"The picture box! The picture box!" The other mutants chanted, referring to a spy-screen that was now being passed around between them.
"Whatever." King Piccolo grunted. "Come on – let's cause some trouble!"
"Yeah!" The mutants exclaimed, and they all started cheering and whistling as loud as they could.
"Ahem."
"Hm?"
King Piccolo looked down to see Fortune-teller Baba tugging at his gi with an impatient look on her face.
"If you don't mind, I'd like to get out of this circus." She frowned.
"Oh… right." King Piccolo looked at Number One. "This woman needs a bodyguard – give her your strongest fighter."
"Okay." Number One nodded, and yelled into the crowd, "Number Two!"
"Yes, Master?" A mutant that looked like Cymbal stepped forward, and loyally knelt before Number One.
"Guard this woman, she's King Piccolo's friend." Number One ordered, pointing at Baba.
"We're not friends! I'm just using her to come down here!" King Piccolo barked.
"Whatever – just remember, I'm a hostage, right?" Baba replied. "And this scary monster is kidnapping me and forcing me to stay in Babidi's cave." She looked at Number Two. "You do understand that, don't you? It's very important that you stick to that story."
"Can I play with that?" Number Two asked, ignoring her every word as he stared at Fortune-teller Baba's crystal ball.
"No!" Baba barked. "That's not a toy! Now come on!" She turned and left the demon section of Hell as fast as she could, with Number Two flying closely behind her.
Number One looked at King Piccolo.
"What is your first command, Sire?" He asked.
"I want all of you to spread out through Hell," King Piccolo instructed. "And destroy everything in your path!"
"Wahoo!" The mutants cheered. "Yeah! King Piccolo! King Piccolo!"
King Piccolo closed his eyes and listened to the loyal chanting of his army; it was music to his ears. His entire being become filled with a sense of satisfaction and elation as he thought of what was about to come. Chaos, fighting, bloodshed, evil… It would be just like in the good old days. Ahh… what bliss. Finally, he could have a day to himself – a day he well and truly deserved. Finally he could have a good old-fashioned King Piccolo day, far away from Frikiza and those bleeding heart traitors, and that stupid baby. What could possibly go wrong? He was down here, amongst his loyal children, where he could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, and Frikiza couldn't reach him. What could possibly stop him now?
Author's Note:-
To all of King Piccolo's fans, I'm sorry n_n' At the end of Demonic Love he was just about to get what he wanted when it all went wrong for him, and I did feel bad for him... but now it looks like it's about to go the same way XD Or maybe not. Who knows! I do feel bad though, if that's any consolation.
Anyway, as always I'll try to get the next chapter up ASAP, but again I'm working on my original fic now so it might be a day or two late... but hopefully early, depending on how much free time I get. Either way, please review!
Also I'm into drawing at the moment so I'll be adding stuff to my deviantart profile, so watch out for that and please comment. I'm sorry I'm not very good at shading... but I try.
Anyway, thank you for reading :)