I'll have more to say about this one at the bottom, but in the knowledge people are more likely to read these things at the top:

If anyone lives near the Orlando area, my heart and thoughts are with you. If you can, please donate blood to help those affected by this tragedy.

When Raven was small, she remembered being called to talk to a high ranking priest. His office was dark and heavily scented with burning candles, similar to dragonsblood on Earth. She had been called in when she had spoken harshly with the monks, refused to do her chores, or purposefully lashed out at others with her powers.

She felt like she was back there now as she sat in Robin's office, though his was darker and colder and smelled more like paper than incense. He sat straight and tall in his chair across from her, face solemn as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Do you want to explain what happened today?"

"Not really," she said, looking down. She sighed. "I know I shouldn't have…"

"Shouldn't have what?" Robin asked, leaning forward. His hands pressed on the desk. "Shouldn't have slammed the suspect so hard into the wall he's got more broken ribs than whole ones? Shouldn't have slammed him into the pavement after that, despite clearly being unable to fight back? Is that what you shouldn't have done?"

Raven winced, and she clutched at the edges of her robes. "Yes. I shouldn't have done that. Any of that."

"I'm glad you know that, because if you were in here to justify that behavior, you'd be off the team." His voice was sharp, hot. She hadn't heard him this angry since they'd fought Slade. He must have noticed too, because he took a deep breath to calm himself. "But if you want to explain how and why this happened, we might be able to fix it and move forward."

She swallowed. "He had a gun."

"Yeah. A lot of criminals do, Raven. We fight them all the time. Are you suddenly afraid of guns?"

"No, of course not." She shook her head. "That isn't...I'm trying to explain, but I don't know where to start."

He had the documents spread out in front of him, not that he glanced at him once. Robin only ever glanced at papers for show - if he was going to interrogate someone, he had everything relevant memorized.

"Let me help you, then. At 2:54 Starfire, Cyborg and I broke off to pursue one of the two getaway cars leaving from National Bank on 5th street. We headed north while you and Beast Boy pursued south. We accomplished our mission at 3:27 and handed the suspect off to JCPD. We arrived at your location just fast enough to see you slam a man into a brick wall, then into the pavement of the road, only to stop when Starfire called out to you. Would you agree that this is all correct?"

"Yes," she said, her voice barely a whisper.

"Than can you explain to me what happened between the hours of 2:54 and 3:27 that led to the scene we witnessed?"

She rocked forward for a moment, putting her heads in her hands. He heard her meditation breaths, shakier and a bit less even than usual. It was always dangerous to press with Raven, with her powers, but sometimes it was necessary. He came around to touch her shoulder.

"Raven, I need to know so we can move on from this." He squeezed her reassuringly. "We know we were chasing down metahumans. We know the man you were hunting was psychic. If he broke through your shields, if he controlled your powers, it's something we need to know. More people could be hurt by this."

She sat up, nodding, rubbing her face. Her eyes were still brimming with tears as she looked up at him. "He didn't control me. It was my fault."

"Did he use his powers at all?" he pressed. "Beast Boy said he made him see something, made him feel like he was losing control of the beast again. That's why he wasn't assisting you, or stopping you. You don't have to feel weak, Raven - he made Beast Boy claw his own arms up through his suit. This could happen to anyone."

"He made me think….for a minute...I thought I had lost control of my powers, at first." She stumbled through the words, looking down at her hands. "Things were twisting and exploding and people were dying, but I knew it wasn't me, because it didn't feel right. I couldn't feel everything I was touching."

Robin frowned. "So you attacked him under the illusion that something was wrong with your powers?"

"No, I...I tried to attack him anyway, tried to push him out of my head, and I thought I had. I hadn't, but I thought I had, because everything went back to normal, and then he made me see…" She grabbed Robin's hand suddenly, squeezing it hard. He let her, for all it hurt. "I thought he shot Beast Boy. I thought he shot him in the stomach and the heart and the lungs, and he was just bleeding and bleeding and bleeding."

Her powers sparked around the room, shaking his desk and sending papers flying. The lamp above them glowed eerily as black energy engulfed it. Her breathing came faster now, more erratic than before.

"He was dying, and I could save him, and he was just screaming, Robin. He was in so much pain, and part of me knew it wasn't real. Even then part of me knew because I couldn't feel him. I couldn't feel Beast Boy like normal, I would have felt his pain like it was my own if he was dying, but I couldn't...Azar, I couldn't think straight, and I just lost it."

His desk spun and slammed against the wall, and then everything came to a halt. Suddenly silent, suddenly light as her powers withdrew into her again. She moaned, deep and mournful, and doubled over in her chair.

"I can't be a Titan, Robin."

"Raven, he got in your head. You have nothing to be ashamed of." He kneeled down, trying to coax her to look up at him. She refused. "You thought this man had killed Beast Boy. The fact that you didn't kill him outright shows incredible restraint. Do you know how often a cop killer gets to live? Sheriffs look the other way on cop killers - people who have been in the business for years have less restraint than you."

"You don't understand." She shook her head furiously. "I let my emotions blind me, Robin. I almost killed a man when I wasn't even sure he had killed Beast Boy. I can't be that attached to people. It's dangerous, Robin."

"Anyone on this team would go a little crazy if someone died, Raven, even me. It isn't ideal, but we can work with this. We can-"

"No!" She finally looked at him again. Her voice boomed through the room, echoed by the slam of a chair on its back as she stood. "You don't understand, Robin. I love him. Not like a teammate. I love him. I've let myself fall for him, and this is the kind of thing this brings. This is the disorder and destruction that me loving someone does."

Robin sighed and stood with her. "You loved him way before you ever had a crush on him. Just like you loved me and Cyborg and Starfire. If you think you wouldn't have gone that crazy for any of them, you're wrong. And if you think that you loving us causes things like this, you're stupid."

He strode towards her and wrapped her in his arms, feeling tears seep through his costume and plaster it to his skin. Her arms came back around him, and they stood in that embrace, nothing but the faint hum of the lights overhead.

"We love you, Raven, and we love that you love us," Robin murmured into her hair. "And your love is just as good as everyone else's."

So, with the mass shooting last night into this morning, I found writing to be a bit tricky. I tried to write what I feel, to turn my emotion into something productive. I don't know if I succeeded, and I'm sorry it came out as sad as it did.

A dear friend of mine lives in Orlando, and he's a part of the LGBT community. He's fine, and the few minutes of terror that came from not knowing is nothing compared to the grief and pain of those directly involved in the tragedy. I can't imagine what those people must be going through.

Hate caused what happened today. A man did it in hate in the hopes to breed more hate. But we should stand with our brothers and sisters, whether they're LGBT or Muslim, we need to stand together. We can't push people away out of fear.

Hold your family and friends. Be glad they're safe. Do whatever you can for those who are in need, whether in Orlando or in your own town.

Don't put anymore hate into a world that's so full of love.