A/N: haha SOMEONE noticed the Gilmore Girls reference. ;)
Chapter 26 - Surprise!
"You look - stunning." Rachel turns around, surprised. She finds Quinn with her arms crossed and an appreciative look in her eyes. It makes Rachel blush.
Judy bought Rachel a beautiful long red dress, somehow guessing her size perfectly. It hugs her body in all the right places and there is a long cut from right above her knee down to the floor. "Your mother got this for me," Rachel makes motion with her hands to show she's talking about the dress. She also has tall red pumps and a pearl necklace. "Mrs. Dirk, I think? She lent me the necklace, and the shoes were a gift from Mrs. Evans. I believe she is Sam's mom."
Quinn comes inside the room and closes the door behind her, her own navy blue gown following her behind. "Yes, they like to make sure the entertainment looks good. Though with you they do not have to try hard at all. You could wear trash bags and you'd look gorgeous." Hazel eyes fall upon Rachel's and Rachel feels her breath literally being taken away. It happens often.
"Thank you, Quinn. You look pretty gorgeous yourself."
It's like Quinn doesn't hear the compliment, she rises a hand to Rachel's face but doesn't touch it. She looks at Rachel's hair, "I love your hair like this." It's pinned up and to the left, with a red rose fasting it into place. Her bangs are curled and to the side, falling diagonally to the right.
"Thanks," Rachel murmurs, shyness overtaking her with the way Quinn is scrutizining her. "When did you get here?" Rachel tries to change subjects, just to alleviate herself of Quinn's hold on her for a little bit. She cannot compromise her performance by letting Quinn get her all hot and bothered specially if they can't follow through.
With a smirk, Quinn concedes. She steps back, still holding Rachel's gaze with her own, and then breaks it when she makes way to the mirror. She fixes her hair a bit, pushing a few strands here and there. "Just now. I had to drop off Beth at the Lopez-Pierce household. You?" She fixes her lipstick while Rachel watches off to the side, leaning against a white sink.
"My father dropped me off half an hour ago. I was hoping you'd give me a ride home," Rachel admits and bites her lip. Quinn agrees with chuckle and a nod.
This bathroom looks like it could cost about three times of Rachel's home and that's saying something. It looks incredibly posh, like something straight off Millionaire magazine. Does that even exist? If it doesn't, it should and this bathroom should be in it. In fact, the entire country club looks like this. Marbles and fancy rugs, gold details, silk sheets. The people Rachel is singing to is used to quality things. She hopes she doesn't disappoint and this thought is somehow getting to her.
She never gets this nervous, she can't. And she's usually so sure in herself, she never does. But something about impressing Judy and the women she mixes herself with is getting to her. She feels sort of dizzy so she grabs onto the sink and tries to steady herself by closing her eyes.
Noticing this, Quinn quickly crosses the room to where Rachel's standing and holds her up by the elbow. "Are you okay, Rachel?"
"Yes, I'm fine," she lies, for Quinn's sake. She really just wants to sit somewhere and breathe.
"You don't look fine. Are you nervous? This isn't that scary, baby. They won't eat you alive." Quinn says and chuckles. She turns on the faucet on cold and lets the water run over her fingers. The hand which is dry keeps a steady hold on Rachel while she uses the wet hand to dab Rachel's cheeks and forehead.
"I've never been this nervous about performing, I promise," Rachel feels the need to say. "Uh, my entire professional life will be made of moments like this, you know?"She revels in the comfort Quinn is providing, allowing for her worries to evaporate with all the sweating she's doing and consciously giving in to Quinn's attempt to keep her cool.
Quinn chuckles, amused by Rachel's need of always being together. "I know, you don't have to tell me that." Quinn's voice is soft but just the right tone to be reassuring. "I also know that it's okay to be nervous." She squeezes Rachel's arm, silently asking her to look at her. When Rachel shakes her head no, she urges, "look at me, please."
Brown eyes find hers and the haze she finds in them is immediately cleared when Quinn smiles. "You're sure?"
"Yes. The best performers get nervous at times," Quinn hugs her, strong arms enveloping her and squeezing. "I'll be in the audience the entire time. If you start to get nervous, find me."
Rachel starts to believe Quinn. "Right, okay." She smiles at Quinn then turns to look at her face in the mirror and sell the idea to herself. "Yes, it is okay to be nervous. You'll be fine." She tells herself nuggets of inspiration like, "be awesome," and it makes Quinn hold back a laugh. When she least expects it, Rachel turns to her again, "thank you. For calming me down, I mean. It's just - your mom watching me makes me... Well, nervous."
"Rach," Quinn says, not understanding it. "How's that possible? She loves you. She hasn't stopped talking about how great you are."
"She's never even heard me sing, Quinn! How does she know for sure that I'm so good?" Rachel argues.
Quinn reminds her, "you've sang to me. I know how amazing you are. And she told me you exhude confidence, she likes that. You'll be fine."
Rachel exhales, giving in. "Okay, okay. I believe you."
At that moment the door opens, and in comes Mrs. Regan Dirk. "There you are! Honey, we've been looking for you everywhere!"
"Hello, Mrs. Dirk," Quinn greets her. She leans in for polite kisses on her cheek and then saves Rachel, "I actually asked Rachel to come with me because I needed help with my... My hair. And she's fixed it! So thank you, Rach. Go on," Quinn gives her a reassuring smile and pats her on the back, urging her to follow Mrs. Dirk. She whispers just as Rachel's leaving, "you'll be great." And she only knows Rachel heard it because of the small smile she sees forming as the door shuts.
She waits a few minutes in the bathroom, taking the time to call Britt and ask her how Beth is. It only earns her a, "you just dropped her off with us! Go find Rachel!" from Santana.
She hates these functions her mother makes her go to. It's not like she even knows what's the point of the DAR, and she knows half these ladies judge her for having a child while unmarried. She stands in corners and walks by walls, to avoid the women her mother calls friends.
Finally, she hears, "Rachel Berry!" There is the expected applause as Rachel emerges from her spot to the left of and takes center stage. The band immediately begins playing music and Rachel seems to find her confidence in the spotlight on her.
Quinn sees the transformation happen as Rachel lets the music become her only focus, and she falls even more in love with her. She kicks things off with Ella Fitzgerald's version of Love Is Here To Stay. It makes Quinn feel warm inside. As Rachel's voice rises and falls to the music, Quinn feels her heart wanting to rip off its cage and make its home in that girl.
Not for a year, but forever and a day
The radio and the telephone,
And the movies that we know
May just be passing fancies
And in time may go
But, oh my dear
Our love is here to stay
Together we're going a long long way
In time the Rockies may crumble
Gibraltar may tumble
They're only made of clay
But our love is here to stay
But oh, oh my dear
Our love is here to stay
Together we're going a long long way
In time the Rockies may crumble
Gibraltar may tumble
They're only made of clay
But our love is here to stay
It's here to stay
It's here to stay
It's here to stay.
The event finishes later than Rachel had thought, nearing eleven. She had two sets, with a fifteen minute intermission in between. She could feel Quinn's presence during every song, and that gave her the push she needed to get through. As soon as she was done with her last song, and after taking in the standing ovation from the audience, she goes searching for Quinn.
Quinn is waiting for her right behind the stage. More like hiding for her. She pulls Rachel in, behind the curtains, by her elbow. Rachel fits right into her arm, and Quinn's hand immediately goes to Rachel's mouth to keep her from talking. "Don't say anything," Quinn warns her with a secret smile and hazel eyes as bright as sunshine. Rachel has never seen this look on Quinn's face but she finds that she really enjoys it. "You," Quinn takes in a deep breath, taking in all of Rachel, "were amazing."
Rachel laughs, as quiet as she knows how, and loops her arms around Quinn's neck. With her heels, they are about the same height, and for that, Rachel is thankful. "Really? You think so?" They continue whispering, because of the need to not get caught; it's an incredible turn-on, knowing they can't get caught. She leans forward and kisses Quinn on the cheek sweetly, finally being able to let go of the stress she's been holding in since last night. Slowly, she leaves a path of loving kisses down Quinn's porcelain face to her neck, up her chin and lands on her lips.
"Mm," Quinn says, licks her lips. "So hot," an eyebrow irks, and Rachel realizes she wants to do things to Quinn that aren't very appropriate right now. Quinn grabs a hold of the back of Rachel's neck and tastes the tongue of the girl she loves. She giggles at the thought.
They are broken apart by a noise they hear. Someone is passing by their secret spot, on the other side of the curtain, so they shush each other, until they are doing so with their lips smashed together again. Stolen breaths and wandering hands makes it harder to keep quiet.
Again, they are broken apart. Except this time, Rachel is getting a call. Her phone, hidden in her cleavage, vibrates and it makes her laugh out loud. Quinn covers her mouth, amused by the entire thing, and pulls out the phone with a raised eyebrow. Rachel quickly kisses her on the lips and takes the phone back. With a look at the number, her mouth drops and then she looks at Quinn with lost eyes.
"What is it?" Quinn asks, trying to mask how curious Rachel's reaction made her.
"It's New York," Rachel replies before stepping out from behind the curtain and picking up. Quinn doesn't understand what 'it's New York' means, but it must be important because Rachel just 'hms' and nods into her phone as if the other person can see her. Carefully, Quinn emerges too, and looks around to see if anyone noticed they both showed up from the same spot. When they don't seem to care, Quinn focuses her attention on Rachel, who thanks the person on the other line and then looks at her.
"So?" Quinn asks, arms crossed, heart beating extra hard.
"Um," Rachel swallows, "it was my agent person."
Quinn laughs, "your 'agent person'?"
"Yes!" Rachel smiles, "my agent. He, uh, he wanted to tell me I got the part I auditioned for before I left."
Quinn yelps and jumps on the spot. "That's great, Rach!" She hugs Rachel and lets her go to look at her in the eyes, until she realizes Rachel hasn't finished talking. "Okay, so what's the problem?"
Rachel clears her throat, shrugs, and forces a fake smile, "no problem. Just, they want me back tomorrow morning. I'd have to leave tonight, or something."
Comprehension sinks in, "oh." Quinn fakes a smile, too. "It's okay, you know? This trip hadn't been planned, and -" Great, now she feels like crying. This is stupid, she should be happy for Rachel even if it means their time together is shortened. "I'll still come down in a month, like planned." She struggles to speak, and struggles to make eye contact with Rachel.
Rachel wants to comfort her, but they're out in the open. She grabs Quinn by the hand and takes them back behind the curtain, where Quinn chuckles bitterly at herself and dries the tears that managed to break free. "I'm sorry, for having to go so early."
"Hey," Quinn shushes her with a finger to her lips. "I'm so happy for you, really. You go and you show New York who you are. I'm just crying because - well, I guess I'm going to miss you, again. That's all." Rachel tastes the salty tears on Quinn's lips, closing her eyes shut with force to keep this moment ingrained in her mind forever. "Gosh, Rachel." Quinn pulls back and shoves her playfully, "don't forget me when you're famous."
Rachel laughs, "as if. First thing I'll do when I make serious money is send a helicopter out here to pick you and Beth up and take you to me."
"Let's go grab your stuff and take you to the airport, okay? I'll call Britt and Santana on the way and ask them for a rain check on our plans."
Rachel nods, "yes, okay. I should probably go say goodbye to your mother."
"While you do that, I'll go get my car and call the girls." Quinn kisses Rachel again, deeper this time, and then dries Rachel's eyes of tears she's shed as well. "See you in a little."
Watching her go, Rachel composes herself with three steadying breaths. This is great. This is amazing for her career. Getting to star in this musical with so many names of stars attached to it? She'll make a name for herself in no time. She can't wait for the day that Quinn gets to watch her. She has to be awesome for Quinn, so she can offer her a future together.
She looks for Judy, who's helping clean up, and after a long hug and lots of thanks, she explains she has to leave. Judy hands her a check from the DAR ladies, which she wasn't expecting, and insists her to keep it. She does, but decides she'll use that money toward Quinn's visit for Thanksgiving. Judy hugs her once more when Quinn comes back inside to call Rachel to go.
They leave together, and once outside and in Quinn's car, her phone rings. It's her mother and they have barely left the place so she decides to only call her back after she says goodbye to Rachel. The girl looks at her with a sideways look, and she knows that Rachel's worried about her choosing to ignore the call. "Don't worry about it, she's fine." She smiles for a fleeting moment at Rachel and then looks forward again.
They don't say anything for the rest of the way home to Rachel's. It seems that this relationship has become bigger than either of them can really afford at the moment with the I love yous that have been said. They both seem to have noticed this on the way back. Quinn has a daughter she always needs to keep in mind, but being around Rachel almost makes all of her decisions feel irrational. Most of the time she goes with her heart. And Rachel, for her part, has a career she has always always dreamed about. Her dream has always been her whole life. Until she met this gorgeous woman with a baby, both of whom stole her heart.
"This should be fast," Rachel explains as she grabs things from her bathroom. "I never really unpacked when I got home last night," she tells Quinn. Quinn is standing by the door, not really knowing what to do to help.
"How can I help?" She asks, coming closer to the bags on Rachel's bed. Rachel looks at her and Quinn reads the passion in Rachel's eyes. It's a second before all of the bags are thrown on the floor, clothes and toiletries spilling everywhere.
Rachel is pinning both of her hands over Quinn's head, to try and tell herself that she's still under control of something. But really, as it comes down to it, if Quinn asked her to stay, she would consider it; she would consider it hard. That has never been a problem before and that scares the shit out of her. She keeps her lips over Quinn's mouth, but not yet touching, for a long period.
Finally, Quinn squirms, annoyed by the wait. Her thigh hits Rachel perfectly between her legs and causes the girl to close her eyes and moan, opening her mouth, giving Quinn entrance. Quinn loses herself in Rachel. Again and again, she trusts Rachel to take her and take care of her. She isn't afraid of Rachel.
Rachel is terrified of Quinn. She goes about pretending she isn't, but oh how she is. She knows that in this scenario - in their case - she has so much more potential to break Quinn's heart, or ruin her life. Especially with Beth involved. But the more that they get to know each other, the more Rachel falls for this girl, the more she feels like she wasn't all that together in the first place. Being with Quinn has helped her find herself - figure out who she wants to be, who she always was. It makes Rachel never want to let her go.
She feels Quinn's hand on her tattoo - let your love grow tall - reminding her of the conversation they had about it. Who is she to try to have any control over something so grand as their relationship?
Quinn feels how tense Rachel is and for the first time ever since their first kiss, she doubts. "Are you okay?" She whispers, asking Rachel above her. Rachel's forehead is creased, some of her hair curling around the frame of her face. Quinn pushes some behind her ear.
"I'm not," Rachel admits and rolls off Quinn, pulling down the dress that has ridden up her thighs. She sighs at the sight of Quinn's bed hair and sex eyes lying next to her. She scoots close and kisses her lips gently. "Do you ever worry about..." She takes her time, indicates them - by dancing her index finger between their bodies, "us? How fast this all seemed to go?"
Quinn's eyes bulge. She was not expecting this. "No," she tells Rachel. "Why? What's wrong?"
Rachel hears the tone of voice and immediately feels the need to assuage. "Nothing's wrong. I just - I have, like, issues or something." She looks away, ashamed of herself for even bringing the conversation here.
Quinn purses her lips instead of saying anything for a while. "What are you worried about?" Quinn asks quietly.
"That you'll - I don't know. Figure out somewhere along the way you don't really want a girlfriend. You want a husband to take care of you and Beth." Rachel sighs, expelling air through her mouth for a long time. "I have abandonment issues, thanks to my mother. I - well, ever before I left New York I was wondering if we were still on the same page." She smiles, sad. "And yesterday when I got here, you were so happy. It made my life to know you love me."
"Then why do you seem so sad?" Quinn asks, not really understanding where all of this is going.
"I'm not, I don't think. I'm just overwhelmed, you know? I guess that I subconsciously still wonder whether you'll find someone better than me..."
"There is no one better than you for me, Rach," Quinn tells her, a firm look in her eyes, heart pouring out through her mouth and eyes. "Don't you get it? You managed to break through my shell; I don't usually let anyone in. You're special." Quinn grabs her hand, "you complete me." She smiles, coaxing Rachel to lay against her. "Ah. Do you remember the story of the red thread you told me, when I had that break down when my father was in town?"
Rachel nods, but keeps quiet.
"I haven't doubted us ever since you told me that story. I wish you didn't either," she adds almost as a whisper.
Rachel's eyes grow as she sees Quinn. It must have taken Quinn so much of herself to let herself trust Rachel. She rolls back on top of Quinn, "you promise?"
"I've never been more serious, Rachel." Quinn tells her. "I won't want a guy. And I won't leave you like your mom did. I won't decide that it's better to do this 'gay thing' with another girl."
Looking deep into her eyes, Rachel lets her insecurities leave her. She leans forward and kisses Quinn, trusting her absolutely. "I got you something," she tells Quinn and gets back up. This conversation is done and out of the way; she now has nothing else to worry about. She starts to grab her things that had once fallen and put them back on top of her bed.
"Oooh, what is it?" Quinn sits up on her butt and pulls her long hair into a ponytail.
Rachel gives her one of those looks, "you're not gonna help me pick up the stuff you helped drop?"
Quinn laughs, "no," and stays where she is. "I can help you with other things, if you're interested, but now that I'm on your bed - come on, you know how hard it is for me to get up from here."
Rachel shakes her head, releases a laugh, and walks over to Quinn, who's waiting. She grabs her by the neck and kisses her, "yes, I know." Then she finds a rectangular box, wrapped, in her lower drawer and hands it over to Quinn. "It's for you, um. I bought it in New York one day. I didn't even really think about it. I saw it, thought of you, and had to get it"
Quinn grins, "I'm excited. Is it candy? Kisses?!" She starts to rip open the package, trying to keep it neatly but Rachel isn't as patient. She takes the box away and earns a, "hey!" from Quinn. She laughs, finishes her job, tosses the paper aside and hands the box back.
"Will you just open it, please?" She starts to pull off her dress to change.
"Fine," Quinn pretends to be annoyed by the persistence and pulls away the lid of the box. Inside it, purple scrubs with pink piping. "Oh," she says, running her fingers over the material. "Wow, I love it, Rach."
She sits next to Quinn, "You do? I liked the colors. They remind me of candy and candy reminds me of you, so-" Quinn interrupts her with a kiss that steals her words.
"Thank you! I'll wear them on my first day of work." She grins, unable to contain her excitement. "You really think I can do this? Unzip me, please?" Quinn wants to change out of her clothes, too.
"You're almost done, babe," Rachel reminds her while unzipping the dress. She kisses between pale shoulder blades and gets up to finish packing. What was supposed to take five minutes sure is taking time. "That reminds me - when is graduation? I need to know so I can make plans to come down."
"December 20th," Quinn tells her, still appreciating her gift from afar as she puts on one of Rachel's bigger shirts and shorts. She gets back in bed as soon as she's done.
"Damn, that's closer than it seems. What are you planning on doing after that?" Rachel zips up her first bag and grabs a few more items to fit into her second one. "Where are you applying for jobs?"
"Everywhere, really." She chuckles, "what I really want to do is get my masters in Nursing Management but I need experience in the field as a nurse first."
"Really? I didn't know that's what you wanted," Rachel remarks. There's still a lot about each other they have to learn. "Sounds right up your alley though, with your strong personality and need to always be in control of your surroundings."
"Ha ha," Quinn says sarcastically. "You're just as much of a control freak as I am."
"No, dearie," Rachel tells her while zipping the last bag. "I'm much more free-spirited." She nods to inform she's ready to go and Quinn groans as she rolls out of bed. Rachel hands her one bag and takes the other two. "You're the one who was in complete denial of your sexuality because it meant you'd have to relinquish control."
"You think you're cooler than you really are," Quinn says.
"Ouch," Rachel laughs, leading the way downstairs. Her tone turns to serious, "you don't really have to take me to the airport. I'll call a cab and he'll be here in twenty minutes. This way you don't have to drive me all the way to Columbus and back. You still have work tomorrow and I don't want you to go to sleep at four in the morning."
"But I want -"
"No buts," Rachel is firm. "We'll have twenty minutes to hang out while we wait. Twenty minutes is just enough," Rachel corners Quinn by the kitchen arch. The lights are off. They hear the thud of Rachel's bags falling.
Quinn intakes air quickly as Rachel pushes her back into the wall, her hands finding Quinn's waist. "Um, baby," Quinn tries, lightly pushing Rachel away. "You actually have to call them for them to send a taxi over." She pecks her again before managing to pull away. Rachel shakes her head with a smile and agrees. "While you do that, I'll see what my mother wanted."
She watches Rachel go off into another room, looking for the yellow pages or something. She finds her phone and realizes she has missed literally ten calls from her mother. She has about a dozen texts from her and four voicemails. Everything asking her to call her back. Seems serious. Judy sounds an edge away from frantic in her voicemails. She calls, worrying over what this could be about.
The line clicks, "finally! Where the hell are you?"
"I'm at -"
"I've been trying to reach you for almost an hour and a half! You don't do this to your mother, Quinn! Where was your phone?"
"I was-"
"I need you to come home right now! We need to talk."
Shivers run down Quinn's spine. "Talk? About what?" She finally manages to get a word in.
"I'll be waiting for you in the den." The line disconnects.
She could make a hole in the floor with the way she's pacing. Quinn is fidgeting with her phone, trying to talk herself out of where her mind's going. There's no way her mother knows, they've been so careful. Rachel gets back talking about Mario - the man who picked up the call - and laughing that she has no heart in telling her. She can't worry Rachel with this. Knowing Rachel, she'd try to stay and help, or even talk to Judy. And it's not like she's certain about what Judy wants to talk about. It could be about the luncheon for all she knows; maybe she's overreacting. Yeah, she's probably over thinking it all.
Rachel asks her what's wrong as soon as she notices the way Quinn's holding onto her phone. Quinn reassures her that nothing, there's nothing wrong, and this time pushes Rachel into the wall to kiss her senseless while waiting for that cab. If this is it, she is going down with Rachel's taste on her tongue.