This is a work of fan fiction, created for entertainment purposes only and with no claim to the characters depicted. Ownership of RWBY characters and concepts belongs to Rooster Teeth. Dungeons and Dragons and the d20 System belong to Hasbro and Wizards of the Coast. The World of Ere setting belongs to Landon Porter and Paradox-Omni Entertainment.

RWBYRWBYRWBY

Chapter 26: Monkeyshines Part 2: Step by Stepsister

"Okay. So let me get this straight." Neptune stood up and leaned over the table, looking at the drawing of the train as if it was going to give him some insight into what was going on. "So someone shot the engineer from outside the train and now it's stuck going at speed down the tracks?"

"Yup." replied Sun.

"But everything'll be fine as long as we heal this one engineer?"

"That's about the long and short of it, yes." Sun crossed his hands behind his head and leaned back, smiling.

Neptune narrowed his eyes. "And you designed this session knowing I'd be playing a cleric. In fact, we've got two clerics and a bard, so there's healing to spare—like way more than enough to make this little problem completely trivial."

Sun only nodded.

Roman made a rude noise. "Let's stop wasting time here. I'm going to use—"

"If you heal that man, I will throw your bard out of this train." Neptune snapped.

"Same." Emerald chimed in.

Roman rolled his eyes. "Oh please. He is obvious pushing your buttons to make you paranoid. We heal the engineer, he stops the train, then we can go kill whoever shot him. Simple."

"Or we heal him, he stops the train and we get mobbed by the ambushers waiting for us to do just that," argued Emerald.

The line of discussion gave Neptune pause. "Hold on. Maybe we should see what's ahead of us on the tracks. I mean, going out of control is fine as long as there's no sharp turn and the bridge isn't out."

Weiss turned to Blake. "I thought this game was about actually doing something, not just arguing with one another."

Hiding her mortification at her group's show of dysfunction behind he favorite mask of neutrality. "That's just how they are. Don't let that stop you from doing what you want though. Just let Sun know what you intend to do and he'll tell you what happens."

"Hmm." Weiss frowned, pondering the many option before her and what the other had been arguing about. "Well the attack came from outside and any danger to us is going to be outside. We have very little information and won't find any in here, so the logical step is to go outside. Luckily, I can fly, so Sun can I open a window and fly out?"

Delighted that someone was actually doing something, Sun ignored the continuing argument between Roman, Neptune and Emerald. "The windows in the train cars don't really open. You could force open the doors or break a window to get out though."

"What would I need to do to force the doors open?"

After a quick check of his notes, Sun came back with, "That'd be a Strength check DC 15."

Weiss checked her sheet. Her Strength modifier was -1. She looked to Blake. "So I would need to roll..."

"Sixteen." Blake replied, consulting her own sheet.

"Then that's out," Weiss reasoned. "Now, I do have a collapsible baton on my sheet because Blake said I still needed a weapon even though I use spells. Can I smash the window with that?"

"Without even rolling," said Sun. You swing once to extend the baton, then one more time to break the windows. The second passenger compartment is now filled with wind whipping in at about fifty miles an hour."

Weiss nodded approvingly. "Excellent. Then I fly out and up to have a look around."

"Got it," replied Sun. "I'll tell you want you see in a second. Emerald, still wanting to pick the lock on the rear compartment?"

Breaking off her death glare at Roman and perked up at the mention of committing some B&E. "You know it. And I'm guessing the crazy lady smashing the window was more than a good enough distraction to keep Blake from noticing me."

"Yeah, I'm not even going to argue," Blake said, "With his charge flying out the window my character's not really thinking about anything else besides how fired he's going to be."

"Wait. He?" Neptune asked.

Blake shrugged. "I get bored playing a girl sometimes. Besides, Alhaen here is based on Nightcrawler."

"You could have been Nocturne."

"No one wants to be Nocturne. Besides, I also played a guy so you wouldn't hit on me in character—it never gets not creepy you know."

Neptune feigned shock. "Hey! I just play my character. They just all happen to be dashing rakes."

Blake gave him a deadpan stare. "Just keep your rake out of my lawn this session."

"And mine," Roman piped up. "I won't be responsible for anything that happens to your character if he tries anything with Meribeth."

Sun raised an eyebrow. "You're cross-playing too?"

Roman grabbed an unopened soda off the table and sat back. "Inspiration just hit me. I figured it was time to branch out, but I'd be damned if I was going to forego the mechanical benefits of being human or not be a bard, so the choice was clear."

Yeah, yeah you're a special snowflake," Emerald cut him off before he could say anything else. "I got a seventeen on Mechanics to open the lock, Sun."

"Doesn't quite do it, Em. From what you can tell, this is a new and very good lock they put on this thing. Blake, you doing anything?"

"Depends. What time of day is it, are we in a canyon or something, and how well lit is the train car?"

Unphased by the battery of questions, Sun improvised quickly. "It's around two in the evening. You're traveling through the mountains, so the train passes through the shadows on and off as you go, and the train car is well lit by magelights in the wall sconces. What's the play?"

Blake smirked. "Since I'm the responsible one, I don't think I'll engage in willful destruction of property like some people—"

"Hey!" Weiss protested.

Ignoring her, Blake continued. "I'll take off my coat and throw it over the light over here in the corner." She pointed to the spot. "Does that at least lower the light level to dim?"

"Sure. Using your Step of Flickering Shadows?"

"Right. I'm going to wait until the train goes through a shadow, then teleport to the roof of the train."

"Nice." Sun beamed. "You're going to take a minute before you can do that, so let's see if Team Suck and Fail in the front compartment have any idea what they're gonna do."

Neptune glared at him for the jab. "Whatever. I guess I'll heal the engineer with Blessing of Protection. That gives him five hit points and a bonus on his next Fortitude save if he needs it. Is he up?"

"Five?" Roman asked, having just popped open the top on his soda. "That's all? Why do Clerics suck so bad at healing in this?" He was about to take a sip when his cellphone buzzed. Setting the soda aside, he checked it, then did a double take at Neo. "Did you just text me from two feet away?"

Engrossed in her own phone, Neo shrugged.

"The worst thing that happened to her communication skills was her getting an unlimited data plan, I swear," he muttered. "Anyway, she says the healing is low because it's a minor action at range as opposed to the mage spell that requires a touch and is a standard action. I guess it makes sense."

"Right. Well five points is enough to save the engineer and he gasps as he comes to. "'What happened?', he asked, looking around wild-eyed."

"Well you nearly died for one," said Roman. "For another, the other guy did die and now the train's out of control. So how about you go take care of that for us. Chop-chop, train monkey."

Sun snorted. "He looks at Meribeth like a cow looks at an oncoming train and says, "Miss you are a massive dick do you know that?"

Grabbing his soda and leaning back, Roman smirked. "I don't hear a train being brought back under control." Looking especially smug, he took a long swig. Then a horrified expression crossed his face and he blanched. "What the hell is this?!"

At this, Sun exploded into uproarious laughter. "Oh my god, I've been waiting forever for you to finally drink that! What's the matter, Roman? Not a fan of turkey gravy soda?" The others soon joined in laughing as well as Roman stewed and tried not to throw up.

"You'll pay for this, Wukong," he said between dry heaves.

"Take that as revenge for the poor NPC you were a jackass to," Sun mocked, as the last guffaws of his laughter shook him. Then he cleared his throat and got back to business. "Despite his new-found hatred for Meribeth, the engineer still doesn't want to die in a train crash, so he gets up and heads toward the engineering compartment. About that time though, you all hear the sound of shattering glass from the other passenger compartment. Aaand back to Weiss."

The young woman in question sniffed indignantly. "It's about time. You mean to tell me that all happened in the same period of time?"

"Yep. If we were in combat, we'd have rolled for initiative and taken turns all going technically at the same time. Speaking of which, roll for initiative."

"What?!"

"You heard me. As you fly out of the window, you hear-" and it was hear that Sun made a an adorable gurgling growl and chattered off some nonsense syllables in a voice that might have been appropriate for a small animal in a Saturday morning cartoon. "-and something flies at your face. At first blush, it looks like.. this."

He showed Weiss his cell phone, which was currently displaying a picture of a koala. "Well mostly like this. Only its fur is matted with thin vines with glossy leaves, there are insect wings sprouting form its back, and oh yeah, it's got six legs instead of four. And it's carrying a crud stone cleaver on a long wooden pole."

Weiss opened her mouth to try and say something, but nothing came out. She paused, swallowed, then tried again. "I'm going to say this one more time: What?!"

"Don't blame me, it's an official monster," Sun said. "Here, let me read it: 'Indigenous to the green moon Azelia, the Kaiyupei are semi-intelligent creatures with a strict hierarchical society ruled by a queen similar to naked mole rats. They live in colonies formed from dead trees where they cultivate mushrooms and farm giant insects. They are also highly territorial especially in defense of their queen."

At this Weiss was not impressed. "Hive-minded koala bugs. What sort of dolt wrote this?!" she demanded.

"I'll send the email to you so you can send your complaints," Sun said through laughter. "Now roll for initiative, because this one's coming at you with murder in his beady little teddy bear eyes. In fact, as it flies toward you, you can see more than a dozen of them; some in the air, some clinging to the last train car with extra-large claws, trying to rip the walls open."

"So they're after something in that car," Emerald reasoned. "That means I need to get in there before they do. Can I roll into initiative too?"

Sun nodded. "Actually, everyone roll in." Everyone did so with Emerald actually getting the highest followed by Blake, Neo, Sun's monsters, Roman, Weiss and finally Neptune. "Alright Em, you're up."

The green-haired girl grinned and bounced her d20, a dark green one with red numbers that was nearly impossible to read, in her palm. "Okay, let's do this. Come on baby, mama needs whatever these mutant stuffies are after." After some close scrutiny by both her and Sun, her total result came out to twenty-two.

"You got it this time. You open the door to find a packed car with lots of tarp-covered crates, but the car is divided in half by a big sheet of canvas with snaps up the middle. Now that you're in the car, let me check your Passive Perception score..." Sun went through his notes on the characters and found the line where he'd written Emerald's character's Perception skill bonus plus 10, representing her ability to sense things without special focus. "Okay. You hear muffled shouts, metal being torn and gunshots from beyond the tarp."

"Ooo," Emerald said, rubbing her hands together. "Sounds like a distraction. I'm going to stealth up to canvas and open it." She rolled and immediately cursed. "Fourteen the stealth. Lousy dice."

Sun rolled one d20, winced, then rolled another along with a d8, then winced again. "Sorry about this, but one of the guards had a readied action to shoot anything that entered and he spotted you coming through the flap. So he shoots you... and crits. Take eighteen damage."

Among the sound of everyone else letting out a sympathetic groan, Emerald cursed again. "Holy shit, a some rando guard knocked off half my hit points?!"

"Guns crit time three," Sun explained. "You've still got a minor action. Wanna cast Blessing of Health on yourself?"

"Yeah I would if I had taken it. We have a bard and another cleric—I didn't think we'd need it."

"Good thing you left them behind to go steal things." Blake chided.

Emerald grit her teeth, but took it because she knew the single most important rule of roleplaying. "I know, I know. Never split the party."

"What's that?" Weiss asked.

"The thing you just did," Roman said, having recovered from his soda. "Running off on your own usually means you're going to suffer. Maybe die. Especially when everyone put themselves as far from the two healers as possible."

"...Oh."

"Blake, you're up." Sun reminded. "Just because it would hose you otherwise, the train passes through a shadow just as your turn comes up."

"Great," said Blake. "Using my Step to get to the roof of this car then."

"Okay. You appear on the roof and get smacked in the back by fast-moving wind. Not enough to knock you off, but the roof counts as difficulty terrain. You see Weiss above you with a Kaiyupei in her face and more attacking the rear of the cargo car."

Pressing her lips together, Blake considered her next move. It would have been nice to get into the thick of things on the other car, but her character wouldn't abandon Weiss's no matter how much action he (and his player) craved. Giving a little despondent sigh she picked up her dice. "I'll quick-draw my three-shot pistol and just use a ranged Basic Strike to shoot the thing attacking Weiss. Sixteen to hit and if it hits, seven damage."

"You hit it and definitely piss it off. It breaks off from Weiss and is now coming for you. Neo?"

Heaving a sigh as if he was asking her for money, Neo set her phone aside and stood up so she could see the board. After a second,s he huffed and gave Sun an exasperated look.

"Oh, sorry." He grabbed up a marker and started drawing K's and G's on and around the train car. "K's are Kaiyupei, G's are the guards in the cargo car."

Neo nodded her approval, then started counting squares. After a few different routes failed to meet her expectations, one did and she moved her mini to the second passenger car, then out the window Weiss had broken and onto the roof. Sun started to protest, but she rolled a d20 and it came up 15. With her Acrobatics bonus, it was more than enough to let her swing up to the roof. Then she flopped back into her seat and picked her phone back up.

"Eventful turn," Roman said dryly, to which his phone buzzed again. Checking it, he glared at her. "You know, adopted or not, she's your mother too."

Meanwhile Sun started rolling dice. "Okay guys, first off the Kaiyupei soldier attacks Blake with his pole-cleaver. He hits for five damage. Next, the Kaiyupei workers tear at the sides of the train, setting off the guards' ready actions. Two get shot in the face as they break through and die, falling off. Four more break through and four of the other soldiers move closer to the holes. Two other soldiers fly up, one more going for Blake and the last one going for Weiss, but they aren't fast enough to reach either of you this turn.

"Oh, and the train moves under you, Weiss. You're now over the cargo car. Roman, you're on deck."

"Can I see through the open doors into the compartment where these little monsters are getting in?"

"Not with that big sheet of the canvas in the way."

Roman bit his lip. "Damn it. I guess I'll double move into the cargo compartment behind Emerald."

"And then heal me, right?" she demanded.

"Sorry kid, not this turn," Roman said, actually sounding apologetic. "Out of actions."

"Crap."

"Weiss, go for it," said Sun.

"Right." Weiss had been looking over her sheet and the neat stack of index cards Blake had made for her since her last turn. "Since I'm a cryomancer, I suppose it would be silly to still call this a 'Basic Fireball', so let's call it a Chilling Sphere instead. I will be aiming..." she had to stand up to reach the diagram of the train and point out a square on the side situated in the midst of a number of Kaiyupei. "...here of course."

Emerald raised an eyebrow. "You know you aren't going to catch the one attacking you in that, right?"

"I know. But he's slower than I am from what I've seen, so I can out-fly him. This way, I reduce or weaken the greatest number of threats to the greatest number of my allies—assuming you and Roman are my allies, I suppose. And the guards."

"Actually?" Sun said, looking over the map. "The guards are minions, so if this guy here fails his save, you're going to straight up murder him."

"... oh. That's unfortunate," Weiss said, looking conflicted.

Roman scoffed. "Eh, it's just an NPC. Plus, his friend shot Emerald, so it's vengeance."

"For a slightly less sociopathic justification, there's no way your character knows he's there," Blake interjected. "She might not even see the hole there where the effect could go through."

After a moment's thought, Weiss nodded. "I'll accept that. So one d6. That's... 1 plus my level for five, plus my charisma modifier, that's nine total cold damage."

Sun rolled a couple of die, then declared the result. "Okay. So the workers all die, freezing to death. Two of the soldiers take damage and the guard... oh yeah, he's dead."

"Sorry." Weiss mumbled.

"Oh don't be like that." Roman shook his head. "Like I said, it's just an NPC."

"Still someone who has friends with guns," Weiss countered. "And probably an employer who won't appreciate s killing their hired help. Oh, and possibly family who might vow revenge. Just because I've never played one of these games before doesn't mean I don't read, you dolt."

At the head of the table, Sun made a show of writing on his notes. "...family who swears revenge. Great idea, Weiss!"

She sniffed. "Alright, perhaps there are some things I need to learn. Like not giving him ideas."

RWBYRWBYRWBY

AN: Finally getting a chance to dig a bit more into these characters' play styles and characterization. I especially like playing up Emerald's mercenary nature and the overall group's genre-saviness. I worked hard to make their dynamic different from Ruby's group; more friendly antagonism and lone-wolf behavior if only to make the group distinct from JNPR-R's teamwork.

It also amuses me to no end that Weiss's 'wand' is a collapsible knee-cappin' baton.

Nocturne, for those of you who don't follow comics, is the alternate dimension daughter Kurt Wagner, the X-man known in g the Munich circus as the Amazing Nightcrawler. She was a long-standing member of the Exiles, an excellent series about a team hopping dimensions to fix the multiverse, later on the British team Excalibur, and finally now part of comic book limbo because no one uses good characters but everyone uses Cyclops because it's tradition. She's actually my favorite Exile next to Blink, but it was fun to poke fun at the red-headed stepchild nature of the secondary X-teams.

So the Kaiyupei. They're a joke that got serious. The whole idea started with Jim Butcher and his series Codex Alera. The story goes that he and another author were having an argument over whether good writing could save even a very stupid concept. His challenge was to mix the Lost Roman Legion legend with Pokemon and from that, he created an amazing Fantasy series.

My friend then gave me a similar challenge: make an interesting monster using the Japanese monster the tsukumogami (an object that has been cared for then abandoned over 100 years, becoming a monster—often an umbrella for some reason) and Kewpie dolls, an old fashioned 'cute' doll usually given out at carnivals back in the day.

I came up with the idea of a shipment of the things becoming tsukumogamis and forming a hivemind. Then I took it another step and made them even cuter by making them koalas. Intelligent, tool-using koalas. When porting them to World of Ere, I made them fey and added wings. And as a finishing move, I though of the fact that koalas only live and eat eucalyptus trees and that... well you're see next chapter. If you know anything about eucalyptus, you know where this is going.

Finally, I understand a lot of people aren't happy with me switching over to an almost entirely different cast for this arc and there's still two more chapters of this, so let me give you assurances we'll be back to JNPR-R soon. In fact, next arc is the Winter Formal and will deal with the girls helping Pyrrha make sure the dance is the perfect first date.

Until then my friends, next chapter Weiss continues to split the party, Neptune plays the knight in shining armor, and true to his obvious inspiration, Roman applies some of the old school ultraviolence.