Chapter 26 - With all my heart

Jacob's POV

"Jacob, don't do anything stupid." Billy warned as I left for the Cullen's house.

I gritted my teeth; the smell had already appeared miles back. I knocked on the door of their house, mansion would be more appropriate.

"Jacob!" Natalia gasped as she threw the door open, she threw her arms around me. I welcomed her into my arms, her scent was all over me, and I buried my head into the hair. There wasn't a strong vampire smell hanging on her, like they did Bella. I smelt the emo blonde one walk into the hallway, and released her when I heard him cough.

She glared at her brother, a small blush creeping onto her cheeks.

"Jacob, this is Jazz, Jasper"

She grabbed my hand and ushered me upstairs, she took me into what I assumed was her room.

Natalia's POV

As soon as I closed the bedroom door behind me, I brushed my lips against Jacobs, the warmth instantly sending a hoard of butterflies to my stomach. His hands encased my neck deepening the kiss; my hands left a trail down his chest. His lips were warm, so very warm. They travel down to my jaw, tracing their own little path.

"See, it wasn't so bad coming here"

"Mhm" He mumbled, setting his forehead against mine. "I'll come here every day if I get a kiss like that"

I groaned as someone loudly knocked on the door, I opened the door to see Emmett with a huge grin pasted on his pale face,

"Edward says to keep the door open" I gritted my teeth, as a blush crept up again

"Fine"

I turned back to Jacob's smirking stature and rolled my eyes at him.

"How's Paul?"

"Psshh, you shouldn't feel bad about it you know."

"Jacob!" I scolded him. He shrugged sheepishly.

"My girlfriend has a mean left hook; it should teach them a lesson. Quill was particularly proud of you."

We spent a whole hour talking like this, throwing comments back and forth until we slipped to a comfortable silence, hand in hand.

"Can't you see it Natalia? We'll get married, and have some children and live up the reservation." He said as he rested his chin on my forehead.

I felt my heart sank, looking him deep in the eye. I could see it in his eyes, the certainty. To want something so much that it is cemented in the future as far as you're concerned.

Jacob could do it. He could get married, and have some children and live up the reservation. He and the woman destined to be his wife and him her husband. I couldn't be that woman. Nothing I could do, or say, or pray would change that. That frozen part of me, the part of me that made me a vampire prevented me from falling into the role of a mother, to have a family, with Jacob, would be impossible.

I put my hand on his warm cheek,

"You don't know how much I would want – Jacob, I can't be that woman for you. Your imprint, she'll get married to you, and she can give you something I could never give you. A child, a family."

His eyes dropped a little,

"That doesn't matter. We can adopt children, and we can have a big family. You're the woman I see myself with. There is no one possible beyond you.

"I love you Natalia." He breathed. His eyes plunge into mine, deep into mine. His words repeat over and over and over again in my head. I loved Jacob with all my heart, why couldn't I move my mouth to get the words out? Jacobs face furrowed in sadness after a few seconds of silence.

My eyes remained wide, I forgot how to breathe. Say it, Natalia, Say it. Tell him how you feel.

"I-"

"Keeping it PG I hope?" Emmett poked his head through the door and was gone as quickly as he appeared... Jacob straightened out,

"It doesn't matter, I'm leaving anyway"

"Ja-" He jumped through the open window, shifting in mid-air to his brown wolf. I only managed to get a glimpse of his shaggy body before he disappeared into the outline of the forest, leaving a trail of what once were clothes.

I collapsed on my bed, closing my eyes, as the tears slid down impatiently. I heard a soft knock on the door and almost instantly after, I felt the small weight of someone at the far end of the bed.

"Nat, talk to me"

I felt the tears freely escape once again; Rosalie pulled me into a hug. I told her everything; she smoothed my hair down,

"So, you're scared he might imprint?"

"He says it won't happen that it's just some legend. But it will" I said resolutely, "Almost all the wolf pack has imprinted now."

"Natalia, ignore all of werewolf, vampire business. How would you feel about Jacob then, if you were human, where would you see your future?"

"We'll get married, have some children and live up the reservation" Without missing a beat.

"And you knew about the imprint before you started going out with him?" I nodded meekly to what she said; I remembered our first kiss in detail, and the kiss after that and the kiss after that.

"Yes"

"You wanted him, Even if he would have to leave you?"

"Yes."

"Even if he would have to hurt you"

"Yes"

"Even if he done all the above, AND fell in love with another woman?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I'm willing to take that risk because I love him." Almost as soon as she asked the question, it was crystal clear to me.

My eyes widened as I realized what Rosalie was trying to tell me.

"So what you're saying is, that, I should tell him how I feel. Even if I know we won't grow old and live together?"

She brought her hand to her chest,

"Me? I'm not implying such a thing. Pshh" She waved "I think you should sooo dump him for a hot vamp-oh"

Her denial was cut short as I leapt to hug her,

"You're the best sister ever"

She broke into small laughter,

"It comes naturally honey" She chortled, flicking her blonde hair back in one of those "Im-too-good-for-you" moments on TV.

I didn't understand how the rest of the family could possibly perceive Rosalie as even the slightest bit selfish; she had one of the most sincere hearts I know. I slid into an uncomfortable sleep, when I woke up I knew exactly where I was going.

I trudged through the forest, Jasper, Alice Carlisle and Esme were gone hunting. Edward was with Bella and Emmet and Rosalie were meant to be "baby-sitting" me.

I stared out the window into the dreary scene; a faint splattering sound could be heart from outside as the rain fell on the evergreen landscape. Unnaturally huge droplets of water left trails as they rolled down my window glass.

"Nat! Come in, you're soaked" Billy's warm voice ordered as he wheeled himself away from the entrance to let me in.
"Sorry Billy, I know I should have called and it's probably not under the best circumstances that I came onto your land without an invite but-" I babbled, "I really wanted to see Jacob"

"Natalia, don't be silly. You're welcome anytime. But Jacob won't talk to anyone at the moment" He paused, as he inspected me with his wise eyes "Nat are you ok?"

"I am."

"You're crying"

"What?" my hands instinctively reached for my face, sure enough cold tears were making their way out. "Sorry I-"

"He's out in the back. Don't take no for an answer"

I nodded once to Billy as I quietly made my way to the garage.

Jacob was bent over the hood of an unfamiliar dark blue car, his body shielded from the rain by the small metal shelter he called a garage. The sound of the oversized droplets, bouncing off and breaking into smaller beads, against the metal made a deep tapping sound. His russet skin glistens under a film of sweat, blissfully unaware of my presence as he works on his car, tightening screw after nut after screw. His growing hair frames his face in its gentle black waves. I could sit here and admire him all day, from the way his blackened greasy hands would press on the edge of screw to the furrow in his eyebrows as he concentrated.

"Jacob"

His eyes flashed to mine, and my heart stopped.

"If tomorrow never comes, I want you to know that I'm going to love you, forever. But right now, each and every day, I love you like it's the last night on earth. And though I may be undeserving, something within needs you to love me too. **I couldn't say I love you to you, because it was such a big thing to come to terms with. But that's how I feel about you, even the word love has limitations that my heart doesn't**"

(AN: / I found the first bit of the quote surfing the net, I don't know who wrote it. The second bit, starting with the stars, is mine. But credit goes to the rightful owner, I own nothing ;)

Jacobs's eyes twinkled,

"Honestly?" he murmured,

"With all my heart"

He broke the distance between us with one quick stride, His lips felt amazing and ever so warm on mine. His kisses were gentle, as his hands cupped my face; he was challenging my desires, my limits. I moved against his lips, making a fiercer, rougher rhythm. His lips transited easily to this degree of passion, moving in complete and utter harmony with me.

You gave me faith and you gave me a world to believe in
You gave me your love to believe in
And feeling this love I can rise up above
And be strong and be whole once again

Because your love hears my soul once again
I can live and I can dream once again
Because you made me believe

A world to believe in – Celine Dion