DISSIDIA: FINAL FANTASY
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For better or worse, the adventure was reaching the end of the line. The hero boy had got the goddess in his arms and transported her with Instant Transmission wherever it was that the Genderiel of Shonen pointed him... and the landing site was a place bathed in green eerie light, with a layer of water that didn't reach his ankles. Crowning the area he could see a marble throne, currently empty. Mike took a chance to lay down the one who had been his travelling partner during all those days, and let her rest.
MIKE: It's incredible... the place where you had detected so much lolicon energy is... the Order Sanctuary, owned by the Goddess of Harmony, Cosmos. The eleventh Final Fantasy world! Where can the others be?
SHONENJI: What do you mean 'others'? Were you expecting a welcoming committee or something?
MIKE: Of course not, but at least Cosmos should be around here... well, while we wait, tell me... my Goddess.
GODDESS: You'll have a lot of questions, my knight, and is only logical that I would answer them all.
MIKE: Then, tell me everything. From the day you lost your place as a goddess... to the current day, please.
GODDESS: I'll confess... when a chaotic, vicious dark stream flowed from your world to mine, my power vanished and I had to adopt another body to reach its source and be able to look for a saviour... someone to bring here, to help me.
MIKE: That's why you transformed into Linda... which is not even her true name, is the one I gave her.
GODDESS: Right... my true name is Dolores: Dolores Haze. The primary Lolita where all others stemmed from. When I died and fell inside this Toon World I recovered my childhood's appearance, and my reign would start.
MIKE: The letter was a fake then... something to give us the hope that Linda had a past to remember...
GODDESS: It's not that. I wanted our saviour to be free of prejudice, pure of heart and mind. That's why my new body had to start from scratch, to develop her own likes, her own fears and feelings... together with you.
MIKE: Bah, all would have gone a lot smoother if not for Xig-lem following our steps.
GODDESS: That being... is something I can't quite describe. He has a human essence... but no identity at all.
SHONENJI: Now I can tell you: he is chock full of the same chaotic substance that is destroying this world. The blackness that flows from yours is strong, Mike, but he is a danger we can't overlook or let go easily.
GODDESS: Now that I am back, I only need lolicon energy and by healing myself, I'll help heal my world.
MIKE: Even so, Lord Xig-lem is a thorn on your side we should be getting rid of, so as to prevent your world from falling into crisis again. He is the worst exponent of Lolicon as disease, HE is the energy which was rotting you.
(The blonde lets off a scream and bends over, the glassed boy has her lean on the throne and hears noises.)
MIKE: Well, finally some signs of life! Maybe the Final Fantastic heroes could tell me where is Cosmos.
(The mains from the Final Fantasy saga gather around the throne, Warrior of Light will be the spokesman.)
WOL: I will speak in name of my partners. Who are you? Why did you invade Cosmos' private sanctuary?
MIKE: Ah, yes, we owe you an explanation. We came from a distant place, same as all of you, taking on a mission for a higher being's sake: the Goddess of Lolicon, present here. We have to gather Lolicon energy, which we detected here.
SHONENJI: I deduce that your goddess has politely lent her throne to ours for the time being, if that is true, I would like you to put your skill to her service too so we can solve this crisis as soon as possible. What about it?
WOL: Even though Cosmos just brought us here to beat the God of Dischord, Chaos... I guess this is just another trial to pass. All of us have the magic crystal she ordered us to look for, so I guess we will be able to help in this new quest.
MIKE: A dangerous villain called Xig-lem looms around all corners. He is looking for girls of great innocence and beauty to fulfil his depraved wishes, who are the ones we are searching for. Where can they be, anyway?
VOICE: I can answer that! (MIKE: Wow, it's Cosmos old guardian, professor Shantotto!)
(The sorceress from the Tarutaru clan pompously moves her hips to approach the group of heroes.)
SHANTOTTO: The boy is right, my friend, I had to protect Cosmos in the old war from start to end.
WOL: Tell me, professor... if we find those chosen girls, our primary quest will return to its own course?
SHANTOTTO: I am most positive, young knight, Cosmos would have wanted to help them in their fight.
MIKE: I will go with you! I want to give that bully a piece of me. Mistress, just tell us where to head to!
GODDESS: In each of the worlds of the Final Fantasy... there exists a Lolita with a big amount of energy. If each of these gentlemen can find her and help my knight to bound with her, their strength will bring me my life back.
SHANTOTTO: Time is a wasting, senores! This is the quest that will save the life of a goddess, Dolores.
SHONENJI: Professor, you should stay here to take care of my lady. If the wicked Lord Xig-lem attacks us, she would be defenseless. That being is made of pure perverted and vicious power. His existence is a venom for her...
SHANTOTTO: Go on, chosen ones, have no fear! Too bad for you I have to stay here... ho ho ho!
(Once again on the road, the boy clad in glowing glasses tries to break the ice with his travelling partners.)
MIKE: Etto... hello there. Do you have a name, or I must call you 'Warrior of Light'?
FIRION: Oh, well, we don't know him that much, but he doesn't mind that... title. (WOL: It's true.)
O-K: Heh, I thought you'd never bring up the topic. You can call me Luneth, the town's wise man named me.
CECIL: Cecil Harvey, Paladin of the Mysidia Order. I am such thanks to some friends I hope to meet again...
BARTZ: I would like to travel again along the princesses of Tycoon! We have a lot of fun roaming around.
TERRA: I know I have someone to return to... a whole village. But I can't remember anyone's faces...
CLOUD: You are not the only one with memory problems. But if you have allies, they help you remember.
SQUALL: Allies, hum... one should weave his own destiny. But because the land is so limited, everyone's paths end up crossing. I work better alone, but despite that, I know I have friends somewhere, and that's enough.
ZIDANE: You still remember that, lion boy? *wink* Your faith has to be what made me arrive so timely.
TIDUS: Eh, I don't want to see long faces. I don't have such a praise-worthy dream like you, but I do my best!
MIKE: You are fired up, I am glad. (^_^) Look, an entrance to the Cleft of Dimensions!
(This is going to be the way they'll use to travel to the different places of the Fantastic Dissidia world.)
WOL: I will go first. According to our data, there is a loli for each of us inside each of these shrines.
(That way, much like Saint Seiya's sanctuary arc, they are going to recruit them before the villain arrives.)
WOL: The others have gone ahead... if I could know just who I am going to meet. I am alone in this tale...
(He knows that lacking his old memories, the loli who he finds will be a surprise. Well, if there are two!)
GIRL: Who are you? A strange magic brought us here from Aunt Stella's farm. Speak!
GIRL2: Don't be rude, sis! This man looks trustworthy, so please, let's listen to him.
(Let's not beat around the bush: they are Kuroma and Shiroma, the mage sisters from Chocobo Dungeon.)
WOL: Effectively, I am here to help. We need to leave this place before an evil guy can find you... EH?
(A loud noise marks the entrance of the enemy: it's the Destroyer, feared in the town of Lostime: Rafaello.)
RAFAELLO: Shiroma... I could not keep my promise... the Destroyer has invaded my body yet again...
SHIROMA: Rafaello! (KUROMA: Step back... he is not the same. Fire!) (WOL: Don't rush him, lass!)
(The boy turns totally evil and grotesque looking. The Warrior takes a fight stance, but Shiroma fell.)
SHIROMA: Agh! *grabbed* (RAFAELLO: I need memories... I feed on painful memories... give them!)
He adopts his first form, and throws wind blades at the Warrior... from afar, if he tries to approach, he uses his blood sword to eat his mana. The hero gets by with swordplay and his endless supply of magic items, Kuroma wants to help and cast a Flare to scorch him, but her sisters suffers as well. The bad guy stomps on the brunette and leaves her out of play, then adopts his perfect form: goes berserk and swipes with his iron claws, but the good guy has a cool shield to stop them and fire a stream of purifying light.
RAFAELLO: I don't get it... the memories make me strong... I should have been able to trounce that intruder...
WOL: That was your undoing, vile critter... I have no memories for you to devour. Your tactic didn't work!
(He ends the work with a Shield of Light at point blank, the boy is cured from evilness, Kuroma stands up.)
SHIROMA: Rafaello! Don't leave us... we miss you a lot. (KUROMA: Shiroma's been very sad, you know.)
RAFAELLO: I can't... I must go! Until I get rid of the Destroyer in me, I can't go back to you both...
(The lad flees through a crack in the wall, and the sisters see how he escapes in Cid's air ship.)
SHIROMA: He has taken off... I would have liked to bring him home. With Aunt Stella, Freija, Meja and all...
KUROMA: I know, the boy has a place to return to... but not until he achieves his goal.
WOL: However, I can achieve mine right now. Girls, if you follow me, you'll soon be back home, I promise.
(The Warrior of Light leaves from there with his goal completed, while Firion enters his shrine.)
FIRION: I must act cautiously. My partners have wondrous powers, but I only have a bunch of weaponry...
(That way, carrying a shop worth of them, bumps into the dead Joseph's daughter, Nelly.)
FIRION: Nelly! What are you doing here? Well, I don't know why I even ask anymore. This is dangerous!
NELLY: No... my papa died, he left me alone... it was your fault! I don't want to talk to you, you are bad!
FIRION: Sweetie, please, your papa was very brave. If not for him, our rebel group will not exist today.
VOICE: Firion, it's useless. (FIRION: Huh?) Your voice won't reach her heart: you've hurt it too much.
(From around a corner enters Leon, Maria's brother. He keeps his Dark Knight armor.)
LEON: We all have lost something in this war. But the pain of losing a loved one's life is unlike any other. We lost our own parents as well, Firion, but at least we were able to stand up and keep onward... she hasn't got that much strength. She is only a kid. I came to keep her away from you, away from every person that brings her bad memories!
FIRION: I can't believe you, Leon. You think that the way of getting that strength is by forgetting what happened? You won't let her become an adult! You will only manage to make her lose the little faith she had on salvation. You won't take her!
LEON: I was eager to do this, Firion. Since before this war started, and however it ends, I was eager to measure our strength. This battle won't be won by the most violent, but by the one who possesses the most unbreakable willpower!
And the fight starts. The enemy has a Blood Sword, so Firion has it rough if he cannot stand on equal footing. Tries to nail him with arrows, but they do pitiful damage. After that, he throws his axe and gets an opening to approach, but eats a Flare face first. The enemy has spells! Firion can't even use his, they are too weak to pierce such a resilient armor. He throws sparkling knives and stuns the rival long enough to start his own lance combo. Leon sweats him off and unleashes Ultima, which the rebel was not ready to block.
LEON: Thanks for bringing me on a silver platter the secrets of the strongest spell, Ultima... your mistake!
FIRION: I can't lose... I have a mission, something more crucial than a mere war among humans... Haah!
(Stops the black knight's murderous slash with his hidden shield, then all his weapons fly at him.)
LEON: Aaaarg! *pain* I have failed... I let myself be guided by the darkness again, and I have paid for it...
FIRION: You had said this battle would be won by the side which had more faith, right? Each of these weapons holds the hopes of all their previous owners, who died fighting... they are my partners in this war, and I will end it... by winning!
(The purple haired girl's brother de-materializes and the little one still has a shock face stamped on her.)
NELLY: You are all the same... you fix all your problems by fighting. I can't live like this... it isn't fair!
FIRION: Nelly, please, look this. (rose) You see this flower? I have had it since Hilda entrusted me her secret. She gave us the hope that someday we will be able to end this dictatorship... to make a world full of roses, and happiness.
NELLY: Lady Hilda wants that? (pause) There is someone nice in this war... she suffers when fighting, right?
(Firion ends up convincing her, and assures her that Lady Hilda will make a free world for everyone to enjoy.)
FIRION: I swear, your father was a hero. It's only fair that you followed his example an supported Lady Hilda.
(After saying that, another kid is entering the place of his own trial... and was even more terrified than her.)
ONION-K: I am not scared... I got my crystal, I can put up with anything. I am going to win, I am sure!
(Reaffirming his opinion, enters the insides of the temple and finds a good acquaintance: the feisty Refia.)
ONION-K: Refia? How did you enter this place? Oh wait, it's true: I was told you were going to be here.
REFIA: What do you mean 'were told'? Tell me what's going on! This is so weird... you vanished on us!
ONIONK: See, I was summoned to take on a quest, you wouldn't understand. But I had to do it by myself.
REFIA: You could have told us! The others were worried, the darkness is looming over our world...
VOICE: I am afraid the darkness has taken root in HIS soul. (REFIA: Ingus, you came!)
(The friends are reunited, and Luneth notices something: the girl is using the Thief job, Ingus, Red Mage's.)
INGUS: No, you aren't going crazy, Lun. See, this world reflects what is in your heart, Refia is not sincere with herself (REFIA: EH!) that's why she wears that outfit. About me, I needed to be strong for Sara's sake, so I am what you see.
LUNETH: Hey, don't pick on her. My mission requires that I bring her to a goddess, so if you don't mind...
INGUS: I didn't came to help you, moron, but to test you! You're the perfect image for the Dumb Luck dictionary entry. Your sweet tongue won't save you forever! You were rude to my princess, so now I will take your girl away.
REFIA: I am not anyone's girl! Stop being idiots, we must return home as soon as possible.
INGUS: If you keep the act, girl, that dress will never leave you: the dress of the biggest master of deception.
The albino faces Sasune's soldier to convince him. The onion knight starts with a pair of fast spells, but his rival can block them with a hand and fire them with the other, via his Double Cast. Luneth moves sneakily to try and stab him in the butt, but the knight has a thick sword: truth be told, Red Mage is indeed the most versatile job. He tries to spam Comet, but only a few scratch him. He sees that using this job won't do him any good, and looks for a way to put some obstacle between him and the blonde.
INGUS: Don't hide, you are making it worse! There is a moment in a man's live when he has to face reality!
LUNETH: I am here. (shush!) *ninja* You said that this world is based on perceptions. I have a goal to achieve! Ninjas risk their lives for the mission... (poof!) *sage* But the intelligent option is not always the easiest.
INGUS: You learnt your lesson, huh... no matter, Refia will come with me, you don't deserve her affection.
REFIA: I am not his girl!
LUNETH: The heart is not something static, Ingus. When in need, it grows in courage, that I will use now!
(Switches to ninja and throws a shuriken, the red mage blocks it and turns around to get the albino by surprise, but he attacks from the front! He thanks him for politely lowering his guard and switches to sage to cast something fierce.)
LUNETH: Ingus, you should have met Terra. I gave her strength to keep on, when she couldn't find her own courage! Power is a difficult thing to manage, but it is necessary to change your future for the better!
(Throws a Holy at the blonde, who tries to resist, but the real hit comes from a big ass Meteor.)
INGUS: *breaths* You deserved it, kid. Refia is now in your hands. Do whatever you want with her...
(Ends up vanishing, and the girl worries about him, but his friend assures her he is going to be okay.)
REFIA: I am not your girl. I'm not! But after watching Aria dying... I would like to, but I am scared...
LUNETH: Don't worry, I can't keep being tied to the past. If we fix this mess... you'll never be scared again.
(After smiling at her, they go to the meting point, while Paladin Cecil enters his shrine.)
CECIL: My brother helped me with the crystal quest, I think it was a bit of cheating on my part... the others had to face their worst enemies. I had it easy when I think about it, I don't know if I deserve to continue this adventure...
(Glances around the room, and sees a shiny red item... suddenly it explodes and throws him to the wall.)
CECIL: (smoke) Agh, what's this... whoever it was, it wasn't funny... a Bomb like that could have...!
(... destroyed an entire village. The lunarian sees that the landscape is now the burning village of Mist.)
CECIL: It isn't possible... it's like that time... that nightmare... wait, I figured out just who I will need!
(He scouts the place looking for the young green haired, Rydia. But his partner in that crime found her.)
CECIL: Are they even real? Rydia had grown up a lot because of the Land of Summons. And Kain, will he recognize me? I haven't seen him since we had to defeat my brother, but if this is the past...
RYDIA: My mother's dragon died... and because of that, my mother died too... *cries*
KAIN: I have heard of people with the power to summon monsters... Summoners, they are called.
CECIL: There is no doubt now... I have returned to that accursed day, when I still was a Dark Knight...
RYDIA: You killed my mom's dragon? (KAIN: So that was the king's wish: annihilate every summoner in this village. I am also afraid we are going to have to get rid of this girl to complete the job... if not, we will be punished.)
CECIL: Are you saying we must kill her... just like that, in cold blood? I won't! You don't even suspect it, but the king of Baron is a monster in disguise. And this girl will be important for the future of our world. I must take her with me!
KAIN: I won't let you. *shadowy* I always knew you were too nice for this rank... so unsheathe your weapon.
CECIL: Open your eyes, you'll see it's true! Are you gonna obey orders blindly? You leave me no options!
(The girl, in her rage, summons Titan and the quake he causes opens a rocky valley... the crystal our warrior got for Cosmos protects her and deposits her in the bottom, so the two friends are going to fight like never before.)
KAIN: Now I will see if you bite as much as you bark. If you lose, you'll have to leave Rosa, no arguing!
There are two women at stake now, the Harvey boy mustn't pull any stops... the rival's weapon is longer and sharper, but Cecil has learned to throw his and make it come back, apart from infusing it with dark energy. Kain attacks from afar with his Lancer power, and drains some of the albino's mana. Jumps around the cliffs to make the counterattack but the lunarian casts Gravity and makes him kiss the dirt. Finally, he has an opening to shoot his Dark Wave tech, which engulfs him and leaves him thrashed.
KAIN: Agh... I see you have strength to back up your words. If you keep like this... not even the king of Baron will be able to continue his insanity for much more time. (CECIL: Then you weren't gonna obey him?) Eh, I am not that cold hearted!
(They look at the girl and she awakens, now the defunct Mist Dragon comes to help her and make Kain fall.)
KAIN: Rats! (grabs edge) Cecil, whatever happens, don't give up. You have the heart of a true Paladin...
(The dragon knight ends up falling down and being lost inside the chasm, but his friend knows what to do.)
CECIL: Rydia... please wake up. (RYDIA: How do you know my name?) I am sorry for the dragon fiasco... but as you can see, it wasn't dead for long. Your mama is still with you, inside her beast. I want to help you... will you let me, honey?
RYDIA: You are not evil then... what do you want from me? I have no one left... I don't want to be alone...
CECIL: I'll take you to my friends, and to more girls. You won't be alone, I swear, all's going to be okay.
(While this happens, the traveller of the Wind roams around his temple, and soon meets a friendly face.)
BARTZ: Bah, I am always entering places that give me Chocobo pimples... (VOICE: Boo!)
(The boy jumps in shock and turns around, and sees that Bal's little princess, Krile, has given him a scare.)
BARTZ: Krile! What are you doing here? No, more like 'how did you get here'... did you flee the castle?
KRILE: *giggle* Hello. (^_^) I was getting bored by myself, so I left the castle and then I... appeared here.
BARTZ: Are Lenna or Faris with you...? (KRILE: You should choose one already, big boy.) Geez, don't get me started! I mean, I have to take a girl to an important person and I have only found you. (KRILE: Hey, are you saying I won't do?)
(She backhands him for not being polite to ladies, the boy self-controls and prefers to change the topic.)
BARTZ: Yes, right, you are perfectly valid. Let's go together, like back then. Should I show you a cool trick?
(The mime shows her his partners' eight weapons, he can kick butts with, but they are rudely interrupted.)
VOICE: Wa ha ha! Those swords are very interesting, I want them for my collection! Bartz, it's been a while!
BARTZ: It's Gilgamesh...! (KRILE: He got out of the Void!) Well, just like all of us did, really...
GILGAMESH: I was eager to find you, lad. And to fight with you, mano-a-mano, you know what I mean.
BARTZ: See, I am glad you didn't die, but I am in a hurry: I must bring Krile to some Goddess character...
GILGAMESH: Don't give me that crap, Bart-ner. I have been looking for you an awful lot of time, for you and your friends, I mean... and now you want to scour away? Come here, cutie! (KRILE: Aug, let go!) I am sure you are going to stay, now!
BARTZ: I thought you were reformed! Leave her alone, you'll have your fight, but dont lay a finger on her!
(The multi-armed warrior pulls out his weapons and the boy will suffice with the Buster Sword and Revolver.)
GILGAMESH: Ho, ho, that's how I like it! We'll fight like men, who dress as women... you know the drill.
And so, they fight. The rival has many arms and fully uses them, but the youngster has a Ranger/Ninja combo: Two Handed Rapid-Fire. When the ugly guy is losing, switches to his super-form, still more brutish. As he is an easy target, Bartolo fires many Holy balls, and chains them to Flood. Looks like the monstrous warrior is done for, but casts three spells at a time: Shell, Barrier and Haste –Did he use the Big Guard skill?- and keeps at rocking his socks. As he doesn't want to waste anymore time, the traveller unleashes his best move: Spellblade with his friends' eight weapons.
BARTZ: For a shining world! (RAS!) (GILGAMESH: Arg! Eight beauties nailed through my heart...!)
KRILE: Bartz, thanks! This guy is a meanie. You shouldn't have stayed, I would have beaten him myself.
GILGAMESH: I don't doubt it, missy. *pain* When you fight seriously, being a girl or a child doesn't matter.
BARTZ: Sorry, man, but I gotta go! Maybe one day we will be able to battle seriously. Yes, someday.
KRILE: Come on Bartz! (^_^) Truth is, I wanted to be alone with you. Lenna and Faris distract you too much.
(While he asks again to change the topic, the green haired lady looks in her mind who is the one she needs.)
TERRA: I need a young cute girl... I feel bad having to endanger someone I know, but I don't think...
(Turns around and from behind a column, another Terra winks at her... she approaches, and is slapped!)
TERRA: What the! (poof!) She wasn't real. Who has done this? Come out! (VOICE: I see you never learn.)
(From behind the same pillar, the blonde artist Relm enters the stage! She has used her Pictomancy skills.)
RELM: Seriously, gal... don't burn your brains, just do whatever can be done. You must learn to chill out.
TERRA: Look, dear, I can' relax now. I must find someone similar to you... would you want to come?
RELM: I could... a weird light entrapped Shadow and me, and his cute dog, we could go find them together.
VOICE: It won't be necessary. (TERRA: It's him! Then we can leave this place.) (RELM: (^_^) Yay!)
(The ninja hasn't found his dog yet. Not saying a word, grabs the girl and tries to leave just like that.)
SHADOW: My girl, I have to bring you to someone... who offered me money in exchange.
RELM: *scare* What are you doing? I thought you had changed! You can't do this to me! PAPA!
TERRA: Is he her father? *dizzy* But how... the dog, and the pendant... now it all fits!
SHADOW: People doesn't change so abruptly, my girl... I dumped my emotions to get more power...
TERRA: You can't do it! (THEM: Eh?) People can change, Shadow. You just need will power. I achieved a great level of power, but later I found out that my feelings were still there... and learned to use them for everyone's good. Let her go!
The ninja knows she will present a hard battle, so he ties up his daughter and starts the showdown. For a while, they exchange lots of shurikens and Holy spells, the lady thinks about approaching just after landing a Gravity. The rival sweats her off and slashes her, she replies with lots of Holy balls chained to Flares, that leave him exhausted. To break free he throws his katana at her, but is blocked by a Meteor... his dog grabs its owner by the collar and puts him far from the crashing area, after which Terra goes Trance on him to finish asap. Throws fulminating thunders chained to a Tornado, and makes him give up.
SHADOW: I thought this mission was a test from Heaven... and between us, you have won. I was a fool...
TERRA: I am glad to see you weren't going to actually sacrifice her... Relm is going to save someone's life.
RELM: Papa, don't push yourself now... when we are done, we'll bring you home... and don't be reckless!
(But the hooded guy vanishes, leaving them with dumbfounded faces... meanwhile, with the ex-SOLDIER...)
CLOUD: I am always jumping from one fight to another... and not even knowing why... bah, what a drag.
(He looks for the girl he is supposed to bring to the goddess' presence, but sees some Sephiroth clones.)
CLONES: Sephiroooth... (CLOUD: Dang, they are harassing someone! I must save that person, and fast!)
(Slashes away at them, and sees who the clones were manhandling: Marlene, Barret's only 'daughter'.)
MARLENE: Cloud? Thank you... those men wanted to kidnap me. I am scared, I don't know where is papa...
CLOUD: Calm down, I won't lose anyone else... I will defend you. If not, your father is gonna kill me. *noise*
(He turns around and covers the child, the one who made the noise is Shinra's president, Rufus... this is bad.)
RUFUS: Oh, look who is here. SOLDIER's most brilliant member... AVALANCHE's most famous terrorist, and now some VIP lady's lap dog... you are always following the flock, Strife, there is always someone ordering you around.
CLOUD: I'm not ordered, Rufus. I chose to do this quest. I am going to save the planet, unlike you!
RUFUS: That sounds cool, Tin Soldier, but I don't think that girl can survive at your side. Hand her to me.
MARLENE: He is evil! Papa hates him! (CLOUD: This girl IS my mission, Rufus. But even if I wasn't ordered to, I would still protect her. I have my own judgement, and it is telling me that I won't abandon a defenseless child! So scram!)
RUFUS: Ah, I knew you would be saying that... a puppet who tries to steal his strings from his master.
That son of a president has gotten better since last time... his shotgun does considerable damage, even if he just uses it to smack him with the handle. He has basic materias like our spiky haired hero, but at level 2... his dog is nowhere to be found, but Cloud matters little: his sword cleaves his flesh just the same. The hero fires a spell and approaches to skewer the other blondie, but pulls out his ace card: a Bio materia. The soldier suffers because of the poison, and the girl because of him... the battle gets even rougher. After some cut and thrust between them, the good guy makes his Mako blood boil and regenerates health, at the same time he unsheathes his Ultima Weapon... and finishes him off!
CLOUD: This is over, papa boy. Be thankful that I didn't Omnislash your ugly butt off. Come on, Marlene.
RUFUS: You can say what you want... *pain* but I don't obey orders, I give them! To people like you...
CLOUD: I wanted to enter SOLDIER... but after knowing what you did with them, I wanted to find my own strength. You've said I only know how to obey orders, but my mates also chose this... and they chose right!
RUFUS: You carry Jenova's cells, Strife... just like those clones, you mind is weak... that will be your doom.
(The bad guy leaves and the poor girl hugs the boy... while another lone wolf looks for his objective.)
SQUALL: That Bartz guy was too ditzy... and that Zidane guy was too careless. This quest is not a frikkin race, damn it! But they got by just fine... maybe I should trust my amulet a bit more. Even knowing what was it used for...
(He glances at his Griever pendant, knowing that the sorceress used it against him still grinds his gears.)
SQUALL: Where can the others be? I haven't had any news about them since, well... Time uncompressed.
(Because of his big mouth, the crystal he found shines, and hears a beep in his head... the SeeD shivers.)
SQUALL: Agh! *beeeep* Ellone! It has to be her... where am I going to now? Or better said, when?
(After quoting Emmeth Brown, the mercenary finds himself in Winhill, but he is not in Laguna's body.)
SQUALL: What in blazes? I am still myself. Maybe Cosmos' crystal had something to do with... he's there!
(Effectively, the klutz and carefree guy, who Squall loves to insult, is now scolding his cute little niece.)
LAGUNA: I told you many times, young lady: monsters love to eat little girls' sweet and juicy flesh.
ELLONE: But I wanted to see you, Uncle Laguna. Raine said things about you she was not thinking through...
LAGUNA: (?_?) What did ya say? (SQUALL: Lagunaaa!) Oops, looks like we have a sudden visitor...
(He will have to ask Raine later, because the foreigner has pulled out the Revolver and is scaring her.)
SQUALL Laguna Loire... don't ask me why I know you, nor how I arrived here... but I must take this girl.
LAGUNA: Heh, the boy looks familiar, you know... but he wants to take you, Ellone, and I can't let him.
SQUALL: Believe me, I am no follower of the sorceress, I just need her to solve a very important crisis...
LAGUNA: And this is the other danger that awaits you out of the town, dear: soldiers wanting to use you.
(They know about Esthar's mooks, so she needs no further explanations. The man nabs the girl and flees.)
ELLONE: (¬_¬) Are you escaping, Uncle Laguna? (LAGUNA: I'm not, just looking for a better strategy!)
They go out to the fields where he trained with Kiros, and the mercenary is thankful that he isn't present today. Playboy lets the girl on the ground and pulls out his machine gun. His future son casts some basic spells, which make his father suspect about his relation to some sorceress. The ex-soldier fires carefully, and Lion Boy has to deflect the bullets with Fated Circle. The father uses his Limit, Desperado –even if he isn't that much- and of course the SeeD needs to reply to the lethal rain by Renzokuk'ing his weapon off of his hands, after which he seathes the blade and hugs the child.
ELLONE: *shock* (SQUALL: Don't worry... I only need you to do me a favour... then you will be free.)
LAGUNA: Seems like the lad is not so evil after all. (SQUALL: When did you figure it out?) Well, a evil guy would have gone for Elle the instant it caught a clearing, and you were only blocking my shots without retaliating: I saw you wanted to cast Sleep on me and get away. Of course, what sort of villain has feelings for his victim?
SQUALL: I know what is like to lose someone, too. I will bring her back safely, I swear.
LAGUNA: Do you want to go with him, Ellone? (ELLONE: Somehow, there is something soothing in him...)
SQUALL: When this is over, you will be a happy family again. At least until the Esthar war... come on, Elle.
LAGUNA: Maybe this boy knows about those 'faeries'? The feeling was vaguely familiar...
(The girl knows she can trust the leather-jacket boy, and they depart for the future... all while Monkey Boy has entered the place of his trial, and gets suspicious... he is trying to figure out which girl fate will throw his way.)
ZIDANE: Oh god, I hope it's not HER... poor girl is so cute, but has a clingy jealous demon inside her.
(Because of his big mouth, Madain's last summoner appears there chasing her moogle, who was floating.)
EIKO: Mog, stay put, darn it! We need to get back to town! (looks) Hey, if it's Zidane. (0_0) He is so hot!
ZIDANE: Erm, hi... I know it wasn't nice of me to return to the Iifa Tree without telling anyone. (MOG: Kupo!)
EIKO: We thought you were lost! Don't give us a scare like this again... Garnet was so worried. Me too!
ZIDAN: Ah, right... look, don't tell her, ok? I want to surprise her in the next play of I Want To Be Your Canary.
EIKO: But you must promise me this. (^_^) You will tag along with me until we return to Alexandria, he he!
ZIDANE: That's fancy, I was about to tell you the same. (Eiko jumps) Yes, I need you on my mission!
EIKO: Ooooh, he finally noticed my female charms. (^_^) And sooner than I thought...
(She thought she was going to take another ten years to impress the boy... they leave, but are called on.)
VOICE: Stop there monkey boy! You won't go anywhere until I tell you to. And neither will the brat!
ZIDANE: It's Scarlet-Hair Amarant! You come handy, dude, want to come with Eiko and me?
AMARANT: You owe me one, tumbler kid, and I will take it right now. How about I steal this missy here?
EIKO: (grabbed) Eh, let go! I thought we agreed on forgetting about personal grudges, you meanie brute!
AMARANT: Without her you can't do your job, just like you prevented me from doing mine back in Treno.
ZIDANE: You are still thinking about that? I couldn't let myself be caught. You were in the wrong place!
AMARANT: According to you, your friends give you strength. Let's see how you fare when going solo...
Geez, he is serious... he casts Aura on himself and jumps at his neck, the monkey jumps and gets outta the way then fires a Tidal Flame. He finally lets the brat free, but throws a chakram that pins her on a column: again hanging from a ledge... the rival follows it with Demi Shock, and after resisting it, the simian blinds the redhead with his weapon's special effect. As he can't see, some Solution 9 balls pierce him. The ninja uses Chakra and heals some damage, he jumps at the thief but Shift Break stops and electrifies him. He should have fallen, but Aura revives him. And just in time, because both him and the genome go Trance. The last clash is between No Mercy and Grand Lethal.
BOTH: Aaaarg! *explosion* (EIKO: And me hanging here like a vulgar Parma ham! AAAH!)
(Everyone is thrashed, the bounty hunter awakens in first place and uses Revive on the summoner, then flees.)
ZIDANE: Augh, this is gonna hurt tomorrow. Eiko? You are okay...! Amarant should have healed you.
EIKO: He is gone... but he isn't bad, right? He cared about me, and didn't kill you when he had the chance.
ZIDANE: Guy is just like that... geez, I'll never understand him. Well, he vented, so let us leave already.
EIKO: Yes, just you and me! This is embarrassing... we are alone, the two of us! Mog, come here, girl!
(After that, the Knight of Lolicon has left his last partner to his own devices while he goes to investigate.)
TIDUS: So that Mike boy has to find Lord Xig-lem... and I should be finding my old man too, once and for all. It's the destiny reserved for a ghost, after all... someone who is made of pyreflies. An unparalleled loneliness...
(He remembers everything he and Yuna went through, and wangsts for a while, like in his own game.)
TIDUS: Hum? A summon stone... with this, one can call upon the Aeons. But will it work with me? (pause) Someone there? *flash* Whoa, the one with the cool shades is Auron, guys! You almost made me buy new retins!
VOICES: Glad to meet you, boy... we are the Magus Sisters. I am Sandy. (Cindy!) (And Mindy!)
(The summonable ladies arrive after the flash, with their insect dresses. The blonde is interested in them.)
TIDUS: You have fallen from Heaven! Most literally. Tell me, would you go with me to meet a goddess?
SANDY: We know what is going on, she brought us to this plane. (CINDY: And we must help our summoner, what else could we do?) Can we accompany our little sis for this ride? (MINDY: Bah, so it's true I am the loli...)
(She fumes because they treat her as a little girl, her, a millennia old spirit and the strongest of the three!)
TIDUS: Don't get mad, kid. *sweats* Want some candy? (murder glance) Erm, sorry... it's just that I saw your dress and... (MINDY: You need more than that to impress me!) Look, I will show you a cool stunt, okay?
(Same as Bartz, he tries to impress her as a sportsman, and performs the Blitz Ace, but the ball bursts.)
TIDUS: That sounded like a pricking... eh, don't try to hide, smartass! You busted my favourite Blitzball!
VOICE: If that is the only thing you get busted today you can consider yourself lucky, Zanarkand Abes star.
(The spirit of the samurai arrives there, Yojimbo. The ones present don't know if they should be happy.)
YOJI: The ball issue was an accident, but the man who summoned me gave me a clear order: to bring my Aeon partners to his presence. Or at least, the one called Mindy. And I always take my orders seriously.
MINDY: You picking a fight, big boy? (TIDUS: Eh, wait, first I need to ask something to this warrior.)
But as he isn't in the mood of talking, he'll have to beat him first. He is not going to use Zanmato right off the bat, so uses his regular katana and orders his dog to stay put. The Blitzball player starts with Haste, and prepares his Brotherhood sword. His rival is very strong, but the blonde is sneaky and punishes the samurai's slowness. So he gets fed up and throws daggers at the sportsman, but are shattered with Energy Rain. He is actually going to use Zanmato now, but he has nothing to cut: the ghostly boy has jumped to his back and jabs at him, after which he jumps and readies his Jetch Shot: with a boulder!
TIDUS: As I don't have a ball, I'll have to use this. Aims for the goalmouth aaand...! (PLAM!) Scores!
YOJI: ARG! *pain* Beaten by a wet noodle like him... I don't know if I deserve to be a samurai anymore...
TIDUS: Now give me my defunct ball and answer this. (whispers) It is important to me...
YOJI: Heh, that should be asked to Zanarkand's Fayth... it's them the ones who decide your fate, kiddo.
TIDUS: Bah, I knew it couldn't be that easy... Yuna and the others will have to get by without me a little longer. (MINDY: Give me the ball... *blush* I will sew it for you.) Can you do it? (MINDY: Let's say I am knowledgeable about needles.)
(He thanks her for her efforts and goes to meet with his friends, but they say Mike is still exploring.)
SHONENJI: Thanks for bothering with our quest, sirs. All these lolis surely will help my lady.
(She is cured, stands up, fixes her tunic and rides Shonenji, the only Genderiel currently out of her soul.)
SHANTOTTO: We are free to leave this place, let's go meet your Knight and see his delighted face!
(The heroes stay there to wait for Cosmos and end their own adventure, while the boy in glasses screams)
MIKE: Where is he? Where in hell! I have combed all the Final Fantasy worlds and he is nowhere!
He is struck by a horrible hunch... turns back and heads for the Order Sanctuary, and his fears are confirmed: the villain has intercepted the girls! There is only a rag doll left of Shantotto, and to rub on the wound, he cackles evilly.
XIGLEM: What do we have here... you have forsaken your goddess, knightie. Too bad, minus 50 points for you.
(The exciting conclusion! But then again, where is Redhead? Since quite a while ago?)
LINDA: *darkness* Where am I... where is everyone? What is going on! *despair*