New and Old Troubles
"KEIRA LENORA KNIGHT! Get back here, young lady!" Logan was searching for Keira who stole his wedding ring. It was one month after we got married and three weeks after we got back from Hawaii. I loved how Logan's skin was still a little tan. It had been amazing. We spent whole days on the beach and in the water. I rarely let go of him, but he didn't seem to mind at all. We searched for names like I'd wanted to do and made out every free moment. We made love every night. It was exactly what I'd hoped for.
When we got back James and Carlos got us our wedding gift. They spent the whole week getting our house ready and now it was completely done. As I thank you I was helping them with their house next to ours. Logan wanted to help too, but I didn't allow it. He wasn't going to do anything physical when he was pregnant. It was back enough he had to carry Keira every now and then and I wasn't going to put any more pressure on his back.
I was leaning against the counter watching the scene amusedly. Keira was running around the table, giggling softly while Logan desperately tried to catch her, but he couldn't run so he wasn't having that much success. Keira giggled again and crawled under the table. Logan bent over to get her from under there, but suddenly stopped and hissed. He stood straight again and put his hands on his lower back, rubbing slowly.
"Logan, are you okay?" I asked worriedly. I put my coffee down and quickly went over to him.
"No" He said. I grimaced and carefully picked him up. He protested loudly, saying he could still walk, but I ignored it and carried him to the couch in the living room. He whimpered when his back touched the cushions. I sat down next to him and placed a hand on his stomach, rubbing softly. Logan hadn't felt ML2 kick yet. I was getting a little worried. When he was pregnant with Keira we could feel here move around this time.
Logan had his eyes closed and I saw the pain ebbing away from his face. He was starting to sit up, but I didn't let him and gently pulled him back. "Give it some rest, Logie" I whispered and kissed him quickly. "Keira, come here" I added calmly. I heard her crawling from under the kitchen table and wobbling to the living room. She timidly stood in front of me, looking down at the floor, her bottom lip in a pout. "Do you remember what I told you about making daddy mad?" I asked her strictly. I hadn't really figured out if she understood yet, but she did seem to feel pretty guilty. She did get how everything she did had some kind of effect on the thing that happened next. Like pushing a button and hearing a sound. She understood she caused that noise. And she did know the answer to that question I asked her.
"Baby hurts" She mumbled pitiful.
"Exactly. The baby doesn't like it when daddy's mad at you and then the baby hurts daddy. That's not what you want, is it?"
She shook her head, curls dancing around her face.
"So why don't you give daddy the ring back and tell him you're sorry?"
She nodded and climbed next to Logan's head on the couch. She put the ring on the tip of his nose and tried to hug him with her little arms. He chuckled and put the ring back on his finger, where it belonged. "It's okay, baby. I'm not mad anymore" He hugged her back. "I promised you we would bake cupcakes today, didn't I?"
She beamed and nodded eagerly. I again wasn't really sure if she remembered him saying that, or that she just understood the word 'cupcake' and wanted to have one. He started to get up, putting a hand on Keira's back so she wouldn't fall off the couch, but suddenly flinched and let himself fall back. "Not good. Papa will go bake cupcakes with you"
I nodded, but eyed him suspiciously. Back pain was normal in pregnancies, but not this early. I remembered he had the same thing last time, and that calmed me down slightly. "Go find your jacket, Keira. We'll have to go shopping first" She climbed off the couch again and ran to the hallway. I sat a little closer to Logan, who had his eyes closed again, and leaned in to place my lips on his cheek. "You'll tell me if something is wrong, right?" I mumbled and kissed his cheek another time.
"I will. I promise" He whispered back.
"Good. Take a nap, okay?"
"Wasn't planning on anything else. I love you"
"I love you too" I kissed his lips and then heard Keira coming back with her jacket and I helped her in it. I picked her up, made sure I'd my wallet with me and grabbed the keys from the counter before carrying her to the car and putting her in her safety seat.
Shopping with Keira was always fun. She was very easy and just sat in her stroller. Her favorite game was staring people down. She followed someone with her big brown eyes wide in curiousity. She took it very seriously and watched what the person in question did until she could no longer see him or her. Some people ignored it, Keira frowned at them. Others walked away quickly, she was extra interested in them and even turned in her seat to see what they would do. Most people just smiled at her. She would smile back and then search for another victim.
We spent ten minutes picking out decorations. Eventually we chose for pink glaze and rainbow colored sprinkles to put on it. I paid and we went back home. Logan had fallen asleep on the couch. "Shh" I put a finger on my lips to show Keira she'd to be quiet. I picked Logan up, careful not to wake him and carried him up the stairs to our room. Keira followed and kissed Logan's cheek when I lay him down. I smiled and picked her up to carry her back to the kitchen and start baking the cupcakes. She sat in her chair, watching how I made dough. I let her taste it and she loved it. But, who didn't?
"Now we go take a nap and when you wake up they're all done and we're going to decorate them, okay?"
She nodded tiredly. I brought her to her room and changed her into pj's. She was already half asleep when I placed her in her crib. I left the room while thinking of what I should do now.
That decision was made quickly. I would go cuddle with Logan, but when I came into our bedroom I saw to my surprise –and displeasure- that he was awake. "Hey" I said sadly.
He sat up, without having any pain this time. "What's wrong?"
"I wanted to cuddle with you, but now you're awake" I pouted.
He snickered. "bad luck"
"Yeah… oh well. Keira and I made cupcakes, they're in the oven now"
"I had no idea you knew how to work an oven"
"Hey! That's mean!"
"No, it's funny" He smiled brightly.
"You don't get cupcakes anymore"
"As if they're eatable when you made them. They're probably hard as rocks"
"Now, it's on"
"What'cha gonna do? Fight with me? That's not fair, I'm pregnant"
"Now, I've a better plan" I smirked and slowly started walking over to the bed, where he was still lying in. I swung one leg over him and straddled him, careful not to sit on our baby. "Trapped"
"Are you gonna seduce me? 'Cause it's not working" His voice sounded high than normal. I grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head with one of my hands.
"Oh, it's working, but it's not what I'm going to do"
"Seriously, Kendall. If you're going to tickle me I-"
I did. He tried to push me away, but needed all his focus on breathing. He was laughing so much he didn't even make a sound anymore. "Then what, Logie? Hmm?" He had a hard time breathing, let alone her could answer me. "Are you gonna sent Keira after me? So she can take care of me? Or did you wanna poison me?"
"N-no… S-sex t-to-tonight" He panted.
I abruptly stopped. Logan smirked and was trying to catch his breath. "You didn't mean that"
"Oh, I did"
"No"
"Yes"
"No, you didn't"
"I di-hid" He sing-songed.
"No!"
"Yes!"
"Sex tonight?"
"Y-no!"
I cursed. "That used to work"
"Yeah… Not anymore" He grinned happily. "It's your own fault, Kendall"
"You're mean" I pouted.
"I've to be if I want to have an actual life next to sex"
"That might be true"
"I know" He put his arms around my neck and pulling me down so he could kiss me.
" I sorta kinda love you" I said and kissed him again, moving my hands from his hips to the bump.
"I sorta kinda love you more" He said.
"I love you most" I whispered, making him blush. He used the arms around my neck to pull me down again and kissed me fiercely. I eagerly responded.
We made out until Keira woke up. He sighed when he heard her small cry and pushed me back. "Keira is awake" He stated the obvious.
"I heard" I sighed too. "How's your back?" I asked when I realized I hadn't done that yet. I got off him and helped him up.
"Better" He smiled. Being my worried self I still wanted to check up on that. I put my hands on his hips and pretended like I wanted a last kiss, but at the same time sneaked my hands to his lower back and felt around gently. The muscles there were tense and rock hard. Logan pretended he wasn't in pain anymore, but now I felt this I wasn't so sure anymore. He was great at lying about his health so I wouldn't be worried. "Go downstairs. I'll get Keira" I said. He nodded and walked away. I followed him out and went to Keira's room. She was sitting in her crib watching her hands move admiringly.
"Papa" She babbled when I came into the room.
"Hi, Keke" I said and picked her up. "Had a nice nap?"
She nodded. I went to her dresser and changed her out of her pj's into normal clothes. "Do you remember the cupcakes?"
Her eyes started sparkling and she nodded proudly. "Pink"
"Yeah, we're going to decorate them pink" I smiled and carried her downstairs to the kitchen. Logan was pouring juice in two glasses and Keira's drinking bottle. She loved orange juice. Weird baby.
I put her down in her chair and took my glass while Logan went over to the oven and peeked inside. "They're looking good" He said surprised.
I rolled my eyes. "Of course. I can bake, you know"
"Seriously? I never noticed!"
"Jerk" I said. He grinned and came over to kiss me briefly. I put the hand that wasn't holding my glass on his back and rubbed up and down and few times. Logan winced and moaned in pain.
"Ow. Stop Kendall. That hurts" He whined. I instantly stopped and looked down disapprovingly. And once again I was right. It did still hurt.
"Go lie on the couch" I said softly. "You didn't give it enough rest" He blushed a little and stepped back, turning away from me. "Oh, and I prefer you don't lie to me when it's about your health. Especially when you're pregnant"
He nodded and walked away. Normally I would've let him get away with it. I cared about his health, and so did he, he just didn't want me to worry about it. But it was a little different now he was pregnant with my child. If he was going to neglect himself I couldn't really do something, not wanting to force him into anything, but he was not taking the baby with him. It was mine too and he had to take care of it for me until he or she was born.
Logan and I decided again we didn't want to know what we would get. The surprise was nice. I was almost sure it was a girl again and so were mom, Katie and surprisingly Carlos, while James sided with Logan –why did I not like this?- and thought it was a boy.
I pulled the tray with cupcakes out of the oven and places them on the counter. The oven automatically turned off when they were done –or so put the settings- and they were already cooled off for the most part. You could touch them and Keira wouldn't burn her fingers when she touched them. I thought of how I was going to do this.
I made the glaze with a little water and put the sprinkles in a cup. I had been preparing things for a few minutes when I realized it was strangle quiet. Normally Keira would've been going on about something incomprehensible, but now she was just sitting in her chair looking how I was doing. "Don't you wanna talk, Keira?"
"Shh!" She said angrily.
I was utterly confused and went over to her. "Why?" I whispered.
"Daddy sleepy!" She said, pointing to the back of Logan's head we could see from the kitchen. She'd tried to whisper, but failed miserable.
I grinned and kissed her forehead. "Smart girl. I'll be quiet"
She nodded satisfied and I chuckled softly when I turned back to what I was doing. I went back to Keira after a minute and placed two cupcakes in front of her, on which I already put glaze. "Now you put the sprinkles on them" I explained and gave her the cup. She grinned and eagerly grabbed a handful of the colorful decoration and pouring all of it over one of the cupcakes, effectively covering it completely. She did it again with the other and laughed loudly when she started throwing the sprinkles she spilled all over the kitchen. I would have to vacuum the kitchen later. I put glaze over all of the cupcakes while she'd fun with the sprinkles. "For papa!" She cried suddenly and pointed to the cupcake that was in front of her at the moment.
I smiled and went over to look at it. In my eyes it didn't look any different than the other ones she'd already decorated, but I still liked the gesture. "Really? Thank you, honey" I kissed the top of her head. Keira went on and made cupcakes for 'Daddy!' and 'Jayes!' and 'Calos!' and 'Gramma!' and 'Kadie!' and even 'Baby!'
I cleaned her hands and face when she was done. "Do you want to go to James and Carlos and give them their cupcakes?" She nodded and grinned. "Then go wake daddy up, but be careful with the baby" I put her on the ground and she walked to the living room. I followed to see what she was going to do. She crawled on the ground with help from Logan's shirt. I saw she do like me, how I woke Logan up, but instead of gently stroking his cheek she slapped him right in the face. But in a loving manner –I hoped. Logan tried not to yelp and quickly opened his eyes, before he would get slapped another time.
"Cakes!" She said happily when he looked at her.
He smiled. "Alright. I'm up. Let me see your cupcakes, baby girl" Keira ran back to the kitchen and pointed at the kitchen table.
"There" She said when Logan had gotten up too and followed her to the kitchen.
"They're pretty, honey. C'mere" She wobbled closer to me and he bent down to pick her up. I shot him a warning look, this wasn't good for his back at all, but he ignored me or just didn't see it.
"We're going to give James and Carlos their cupcakes" I explained and took Keira from him. He wasn't very happy with that. I ignored the state of the kitchen, knowing that I'll have to clean it up eventually. "Let's go"
We walked to our neighbors and went in without knocking, like we always did. They did the same, so I didn't really feel guilty about it. Besides, we spent most of the days together anyway.
We found Carlos in the living room. He'd clearly been crying. Keira noticed to and squirmed in my arms. I put her down and she walked over to Carlos, crawling into her lap. He smiled at her and then got a confused and slightly worried look on his face. He turned his head and saw us standing in the opening of the living room. "Oh, hey" He said and quickly whipped his eyes, before putting his arms back around Keira.
"What's wrong?"
He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Nothing"
Yeah, right. "Where's James?"
"Upstairs" Carlos answered and didn't look at us. "What brings you here?"
"Cakes!" Keira said happily and climbed off his lap again to snatch the box with cupcakes from my hands. She went back to Carlos and showed them to him.
"For Calos!"
He smiled, a real smile this time. "Thanks, Keke"
"Jayes?" She asked.
"He'll come down in a minute, Keira. Tell me, which one was mine again?" Carlos asked to distract her from James.
Once all three of us had the right cupcake we sat down and ate them. Keira didn't even eat half of hers and started playing with the toys Carlos bought for her for when they would've to babysit her. Spoiled brat.
James came down and although he looked fine, we knew him well enough to see he'd cried as well. There had been something up with them for quite a while now. It had started about four months before our wedding, when at some point they'd both become extremely happy. That lasted for about two months and they were really close. It was great to see them so couple-ish with each other. It suddenly changed, the happy sphere around them had disappeared, while the closeness had stayed. This was when I was when I got suspicious they were not telling us something. And for the last three weeks their relationship had been unstable. Some days they were really close and sweet to each other. They would whispered things in the other's ears and steal kisses when they thought we weren't looking. Other days, like today, they were both grumpy and tense and stayed away from each as far as possible.
On top of that. I noticed James looking at Logan more. It was irritating me so much. What the hell did he want? He had Carlos and Logan was mine. I wasn't afraid to show that and every time I caught him doing that I wrapped an arm around Logan's waist and glared at him until he noticed the look in my eyes and looked away. I was getting pretty good at recognizing the 'I'm-talking-to-Logan-so-it's-nice-to-look-him-in-the-eyes' look and the 'I-want-you' look. Because that's what I saw in James' eyes every time I caught him looking at us. Jealousy.
"Hey, guys. How are you doing?" He asked politely, keeping the subject off him and Carlos.
"Great. Now the big question, how are you? What's going on?" Logan asked sternly.
"Nothing" James said quickly. Carlos turned to him and raised an eyebrow, silently asking James 'why not?'.
"Yeah, right. There has been something up with you for almost a half year now. Does it have something to do with us? Why can't you just tell what's going on?" I asked.
"Do you've to know everything? We don't want to tell, deal with it" James snapped.
"James, you promised we would tell when they would ask about it" Carlos reminded him.
"No. They don't need to know"
"You said-"
"I know what I said! And I take it back, okay? I'm not ready for this"
"You take it back? Do you care at all? You know what, why don't you just go away all together? I don't care anymore"
James' angry face changed comically fast. "I do care" He said softly.
"Then why don't you show it? It's not that hard, you know"
James walked up to Carlos and gave him a kiss on his forehead. "You're right. I'm sorry" He mumbled. "I know I promised, but I really don't want to tell right now. Can we wait a little longer?" Pleaded James.
Carlos nodded forgivingly. James smiled and gave Carlos and apologetic kiss. I glanced at Logan and saw him smiling. He noticed me looking at him and leaned closer to whispered in my ear. "It's cute how quick James gives in. He only does that with Carlos"
"I heard that!" James said loudly. "It's not true"
"Yes, it is" Carlos said and grinned at James. He stood on tip toes to kiss him.
"Yeah, but they didn't need to know that" He pouted.
Logan laughed. "You're not the only one who does, James. I know another one"
"Hey!" I said when I realized he was talking about me.
Carlos smirked and fist boxed Logan. "We rock"
"Yeah, we do" Logan laughed.
"I remember you both eagerly giving in when we proposed" James brought in and raised an eyebrow.
I smirked, if we were going to play like this, James and I so were going to win. "And you two are the girly ones"
"Carlos has to stand on tip toes to kiss me"
"Logan enjoys submitting"
Carlos and Logan exchanged desperate glances. "yeah, well, you… uhm… You two are the ones that are into cuddling" He said triumphantly.
I raised an eyebrow. "And that proves what?"
"That you two are girls here. Not me and Logan"
My grin faltered. I saw James expression growing into one of disbelieve. James and I were so not the wives. That was just one step too far. From Carlos. My Logie had said nothing. Although he had been very amused by that remark…
"One step too far, buddy" Logan mumbled slightly panicked into Carlos' ear.
"I noticed. Now what? You're the genius, figure something out"
"I panic under pressure! Just run!"
Carlos didn't question it and trusted on Logan completely. Logan's back had thankfully recovered enough from that second nap, so I didn't have to worry about him hurting his back while running. They both sped off, out of the house into the backyard. I grinned at James and glanced at Keira, who was playing sweetly in her corner, before running after James, making sure to close the door behind me so she wouldn't walk outside and fall down the few steps that led from the veranda to the grass field.
Logan and Carlos were already standing at the end of the garden, Carlos clearly yelling at Logan for coming up with such a stupid plan. I agreed on that.
Neither of them had seen us yet and James and I both took a side trapping them in their corner. Carlos noticed first and fled, running away from James. See, that was his mistake. If he thought I would go straight after Logan, he was wrong. This was one amazing opportunity. I would just keep him until I could trade with James when he caught Logan. I wasn't really sure if I liked that yet, but I knew James well enough that he wouldn't make a stupid move so fast after he and Carlos fought. I hoped that hadn't changed.
Carlos ran past me and I grabbed his wrist, pulling him back. He squeaked and almost fell. I smirked and quickly pulled his arms behind his back. He struggled, but couldn't break free. "Not cool, Kendall"
"Hey Kendall!" Yelled James. "I wanna trade" He was holding Logan the same way as I was holding Carlos, with his arms behind his back, as a cop that tried to put handcuffs on someone's wrists.
"James, let go of me" Logan said calmly.
"Not until I've traded you for my husband"
"Please, James. Just let go of me. I'll wait right here" He sounded slightly panicked now.
"Can't do, Loges. Deal with it"
And that's when I noticed how scared Logan was. I had a flash back to the months after 'Jett happened'.
"I don't mind you kissing me" He then said softly.
"Then why don't you let me?" I asked.
"You've the intention to hold me real tight when you do that" He whispered.
That wasn't exactly what I'd expected him to say. "So?"
"So? I've been unable to fucking move for two weeks! That's so! You're no longer Kendall the moment you do that. You become like Jett and it scares me shitless. You happy now?"
Logan had freaked out every time he somehow had to stay in place. He almost fainted when we got stuck in the elevator for two minutes. It was clearly not only me holding him so tight he couldn't get away, but anyone and any situation.
"Fuck" I cursed. I let go of Carlos and quickly started running towards them. "James, let go"
"Yeah, but-"
"NOW!" I snapped. James looked rather offended and released Logan's wrists. He probably thought I didn't like it he was touching Logan, that this had something to do with the 'James-likes-Logan' thing. It didn't.
I caught Logan when he stumbled forward. He wrapped his arms around my chest tightly, like he was never letting go of me again. I also remembered this from that months. He was trembling pretty badly and I felt tears dripping on my shirt. "Shh. You're okay, sweetie. That was just James"
This was the first time he fell back into this and I tried to remember what I did back then to calm him down. I looked up and saw that James and Carlos now recognized the whole thing too. He'd always been clung to me the months after Jett happened. James got a very guilty look on his face. I smiled sadly at him, telling him he couldn't have known this would happen.
Logan was trying to disappear into my body. That's what it felt like anyway. He was almost squeezing me so hard I couldn't breath. I didn't really know what I had to do now and just rubbed his back, trying to come up with something brilliant that would take his mind off things. Luckily Carlos had figured out the first step of a plan. "Go home. We'll watch Keira" I nodded and gave them another sad smile, before leaning down slightly and putting an arm behind Logan's knees, lifting him up bridal style. James and Carlos went back inside and I carried Logan home, using the small porch that connected our gardens.
I put him on the ground when I closed the backdoor behind us and started walking to the stairs, figuring he would follow me. Wrong conclusion.
"Don't go" He whimpered.
I instantly turned around and pulled him back in my embrace. "I was just going to fill the bath, Logie" I mumbled and kissed his forehead. He nodded and grabbed my hand. I pulled him with me to the bathroom upstairs. He sat on the closed toilet lit while I turned the faucet and poured some bubbles in it. I pulled off my clothes and then went over to help him with his, which was slightly difficult since he was still shaking. I helped him into the bathtub first before sliding behind him and pulling him back against my chest. I put my hands on his stomach , gently rubbing his bump with our baby. It took a while before I felt him relax, but he did and I couldn't have been happier. That was until I saw tears running down his cheeks. I hummed softly in his ear, rocking him slightly and trying to get him calm again. I continued doing this until he cried himself to sleep.
When he didn't wake up after half an hour I was getting a little worried about the temperature of the water. I didn't want him to get sick because he'd been sleeping in cold water. I managed to get the plug out without waking him. When enough water ran out of the bath I put the plug back and turned the water on again, turning the temperature really hot. I felt better when he was no long lying in cold water.
Another half an hour later I saw his eyelid flutter. "Hey, sweetie" I said quietly.
"Hi" He answered tiredly.
"Do you feel any better?" He nodded, but didn't say anything. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
"No" He whispered. "It's okay now. I just freaked out and then I had to think of what happened. I'm fine now"
I nodded worriedly and decided to keep an eye on him for the rest of the day. We got out and made dinner together. After eating we watched a movie and then went to bed. I got in and Logan scooted towards me, curling up on my side. "Thank you" He said softly and kissed my cheek.
"For what?"
"For being the most perfect husband ever and calming me down today"
"Everything for you, sweetie"
He smiled and snuggled closer, deeper in my embrace. "I love you, Kendall"
"I love you too, Logie. So much"
I don't have really something to tell you. Just tell me what you think? :)