Naruto was sitting at a desk. "Like a vampire, we at the Naruto News Show will suck the blood out of every news story and feed the corpse to the news hounds. NOW!"
Naruto News Show: Series Three
By PikaFlash And the News Team
Edition 6: This
Disclaimers: Almost all of the (fake) News Reports and ideas are mine. The Characters and scenes are not.
Naruto sits at his news desk.
"Hola, hombres. I'm Uzumaki Naruto. And on the news this chapter..."
Ninja Pokémon Trainers: Why it won't work...
Ramen Eating: Now officially an Olympic Sport!
And everyone is wondering why we are always making references about Aerith Gainsborough.
Naruto sits back at his desk. "Right now, a wrap up of this week's sport with French Fanfiction Professor Cendre Ketcham from the University of Paris." Naruto looks at the professor. "And it's a big week in sport, right, Professor?"
Professor Cendre is sitting next to Naruto at the desk. "C'est exact que Pokémon sports sont les plus grands. Sans compter que nous avons le plus grand des formateurs pour ces Pokémons. "
Naruto nods as Cendre continues. "En parlant de Pokémon Sports, Cerulean United a battu Alt. Indigo Pokémon dans la Ligue de soccer lors de la finale Indigo Pleateu. Fans célébré la victoire par circonscription bicyclettes dans les rues. Plus d'information plus tard ce soir." Cendre looks at Naruto.
"So, it's a pretty good to talk about those Pocket Monsters?" Naruto asks.
"Oui. Ils sont fascinants sujets à la recherche pour ma fanfiction projets," said Cendre.
"That's nice. More to come later..." Naruto looks at the camera as Cendre was waving his arms, trying to get Naruto's attention. "And evading Pokémons for now, we move on to the Civil War in the Digi-World. Sasuke Uchiha filed this report until it's very nicely smooth..."
Digi-World war
Sasuke is standing in front of a wall.
"It is now a crisis in the Digi-World as two factions are fighting each other in a major battle over who should be Katara's boyfriend in Season Three of the hit Nickelodeon Series, Avatar: The Last Airbender. The Kataang faction is furious over the fact that Zuko betrayed the main characters to join the bad guys..."
A Digimon was throwing firebombs at the opposition.
Sasuke: "However, the Zutara faction retorted that statement by continuously firebombing the Kataang faction bases, claiming that they're willing to die for their beliefs. Tensions are tight and the stakes are high and local Digimons are keeping their eyes on their Television sets for the latest news on the Avatar series to find out if this bitter battle is going to end, hopefully in peaceful terms. This is Sasuke Uchiha in the Digi-World..."
Back with Naruto at his news desk.
But right now...
"...what we were already doing," finished Naruto. "President Goku has condemned the arrest of Pokémon Trainer Gary Oak. He says it would be much more helpful for his own future if they could arrest Presidential Candidates Ash Ketchum and Tai Kamiya, Vice-President Vegeta and also Naruto News Show Newsreader, Naruto Uzumaki. What?"
Ino was dancing in front of a marching band.
Naruto at his desk. "President Goku has visited the South Pole for discussions over the melting of the Polar Cap. The welcome was frosty as expected but not as much before global warming."
Vegeta is evilly laughing in a press conference.
Naruto looks up. "Pandas, Tenten has more."
Konoha Zoo
A panda was in an enclosure in Konoha Zoo.
Tenten: "Konoha Zoo has only one panda. Zoologist Gaara says that he can help change all that."
Gaara is standing next to a fence.
Tenten: "But who in their right mind would f(censored) a panda? This is Tenten in a voiceover box..."
"And before we go, a quick look at the riots around the world...
Hollywood California
Rioters were kicking fences in front of the Viz Studios.
Naruto: "Thousand of American Naruto fans angry over the cutting of filler episodes..."
Tokyo Japan
Rioters were being attack by Riot police back in Tokyo.
Naruto: "...while Japanese Naruto fans get beaten up during protests for adding fillers into the Naruto Episodes, prompting the use of water cannons and tear gas."
Digi-World
Digimon Rioters were forcefully carried away.
Naruto: "In the Digi-World, brutal crackdown on rioters..."
Konoha
Sakura was lying on the floor as her friends checked on her.
Naruto: "...while back home in Konoha, Sakura gets hit on the head by a rock."
Naruto shakes his head and sighs. "What is going on with the world? Its insanity gone mad. And now, the headlines for tomorrow..."
Konoha Times - Digimons Naughtier than Pokémon
Naruto: "Typical of Konoha Times and their propaganda."
Konoha Herald - Tsunade to wed Toad
Naruto: "The usual stuff in the Herald."
Suna Weekly - Vote Ash Ketchum for Japanese President
Naruto: "And Temari finally got her way."
Naruto nods. "So, until next time, we'll see you next time until then..."
Naruto looks at his sheets of paper, and then notices the reader is still reading this fanfic. "Are you still here? Go read something else!"