Chapter 26

Bella POV

Jasper looks at me confused.

"Baby what are you sorry for?" He asks

I don't know how he can stand to be in a room with me after what I just did to him, but I can feel his confusion and this just makes me feel worse.

"I shouldn't have done that, you asked me not to and I did anyway. I should have respected your decision and stopped but I didn't. I'm no better than those men." I answer.

"You are nothing like those men. You asked me to trust you and I did. I didn't red now did I? I knew that if I had been really uncomfortable you would have stopped and if you hadn't carried on I would never have realized what I've been missing out on. Baby you must see that even though you carried on you still gave me a choice. You gave me control to stop it at any time by allowing me safe words. Would any of those animals have given you a choice? Would they have stopped if you were in pain? Would they have cared about you? We both know the answers to these questions would be no but for you all those answers would be yes. They only cared about their own pleasure, you cared about our pleasure, and you have to be able to see the difference. I know that you taking control is hard but you have proved again that you can, and think if it was anyone else you wouldn't be doing sexual things with them, well you better not be." Jasper says.

"I know. I just feel I should have listened to you more Jasper." I moan.

"Baby you did that's why you took it slow and ensured that I enjoyed it." Jasper says with a smile.

"You did seem to enjoy it. I couldn't believe what it felt like to be able to enjoy sex, and not be waiting for the pain to start. I never knew it could be like that; it never was in the past. When you made me cum over and over I just knew that I needed you to claim me fully and at the end I wanted you to bite me but I don't now why?" I wondered.

"Baby that was so intense and I loved every minute of it. The need to claim you has been so strong recently and the reason you wanted my bite was to show me that subconsciously you trust me and see me as your master and mate." He says.

Jasper just holds me in his arms and lets me process all that has happened and the more I think about it the more I realize that I was different because I would never hurt Jasper I would rather be hurt myself than have him hurt. I think over what we did and as I remember it I can feel my arousal rise. Jasper is still holding me and purring deep in his chest and I feel so safe.

"Baby I would like us to try something but if you don't want to I will understand and you will have to trust me completely do you think you can? Jasper asks.

I feel my panic rising but then J hits me with love, courage, and trust.

"J what is it you want to do?" I ask nervously.

"I want to claim you again now, but I want us to go back to the "room" to do it but with me as Master and you as my submissive. I won't tie you without your permission and there will be no punishments but you need to see that in that room with me even as Master you are safe. Do you think you can do it? Do you trust me enough?" J asks.

I can feel his hope that I will do this and also this honesty in his words I know he won't hurt me. J raises his hand and pulls my lip from between my teeth.

"If it would make you feel better we will still have our safe words." Jasper says.

I look into his eyes and nod.

"Isabella I want you in the "room" naked and in the open position in two minutes. I don't want you to touch anything in the room and you are to remember that I will only be addressed as Master in there, your safe words are as normal now move" Master orders.

I walk back upstairs with so many warring emotions going on. I strip and get into the position he asked me to. I don't know if I can do this I feel vulnerable and humiliated. All I want to do is run but just before I can Master walks in and comes straight over to me and gently strokes my hair helping me to relax.

Master then places a soft collar around my neck and my breathing speeds up and the panic starts.

"Yellow" I whisper

"Isabella it's just a piece of clothing. It looks lovely on you there's no need to panic. Feel it. It can do you no harm." Master gently soothes.

I feel the collar and it's a soft and small it doesn't have the rings like the ones I used to have to wear. Knowing this I start to calm down. Once I'm calm Master asks my colour and I tell him green he then pushes his cock deep into my mouth.

"Isabella I want you to remain still with your mouth open and your eyes looking into mine. If you can do that while I fuck your mouth I will let you drink my cum and then make you cum as well. Can you do that for your Master?" He asks

I look up into Masters eyes and this is all the answer that he needs, as I can't talk with his cock buried deep in my throat. I have never been more pleased that I don't need to breath. Master puts his hands on either side of my head holding me in the position that he wants and then starts to thrust into my throat. I try to remain calm as he holds my head. As this carries on his eyes never leave mine and all I can see in them is love and pride. Seeing this makes me feel a little more comfortable and then all of a sudden I'm swallowing Masters cum.

"Well done Isabella. Did you enjoy that or were you uncomfortable? You shielded your emotions from me and that is something you need to work on. If I don't know your emotions how can I help?" Master says.

"I felt bad to start with when you held my head but as soon as I looked in your eyes and saw how you enjoyed it I felt better, Master" I answer

Master offers me his hand which I except and he pulls me up and then walks me over to the cross.

"Isabella stand how I place you and stay in that position." Master tells me.

Master puts my hand behind my back and gets me to hold the cross with them and then he opens my legs so that he can easily access my pussy.

Once he is satisfied with my position he starts to kiss me all over and then takes first one nipple and then the next into his mouth sucking, nipping and flicking it. I feel myself close to cumming and when I think I can't stop it Master tells me I need permission to cum.

This reminds me of what Phil and the other men used to say and I feel the sensation to cum go and I feel as though I'm back with the Masters.

I manage to bring myself back knowing that I'm safe with Jasper. I ask to cum and Master says no in a commanding voice.

That's it I'm with the Masters tied to the cross the panic consumes me and I can't see anything but Phil's eyes. I can feel my nipples being sucked harder but it's Phil doing it and I need to escape.

I can hear someone talking to me or calling my name buts its no good, I know its Jasper but he's not really here with Phil. I realize that Phil hasn't tied me down and maybe if I'm quick enough I can escape.

"Isabella you need to listen to my voice." Masters voice commands.

How can I listen to his voice when I know he is only in my mind, but if that is his voice maybe I'll be safe soon.

"Isabella can you hear me?" Master questions

"Yes Master" I reply.

"You are safe. Can you tell me your safe word?" Master enquires

"It's Red Master." I say

"Isabella I need you to tell me where you are and who your Master is?" He asks.

"I'm in Florida and you are my Master." I answer

"I need you to tell me the name you give your Master when not in this room?" He asks

"You say that I have to call you Master at all times and the only time I'm allowed to call you Phil is when we are out." I answer feeling more and more confused, why do I have a safe word Phil has never given me one before.

I don't understand why Phil is asking this but I have to go now. Pushing Phil away I run for the door. I've done it. I've escaped Phil. I run and run and run. Not knowing what to do I just sit down and sob.

"Bella can you hear me."

No he has found me now I'm really in trouble.

"Yes Master. I'm sorry that I ran from you." I sob

"Bella it's me Jasper and you will never be in Florida with Phil like that again. You need to come back to me Bella do you think that you can?" He asks

What I'm not in Florida? I'm at home with Jasper then why don't I feel safe? I look up and can see Jasper's worried eyes and I realize that my mind was just playing tricks on me.

"I'm sorry Jasper I just got mixed up. I'm so sorry." I apologize

"Baby you have nothing to be sorry about we knew this could happen. Are you ready to go home?" Jasper asks

"Can we stay here for a while please Master?" I whisper

"Bella I'm just Jasper out here you don't have to call me Master. Yes we can stay as long as you want." He replies

We talk about what happened in the "Pain room" and I tell him that his order not to cum triggered it off.

He tells me that now he knows what will cause a problem he will work around it.

I look deep into his eyes and say with as much conviction as I can

"I will not be going back into the "pain room" again.

I can feel his disappointment but I don't really care at the moment.

"I know that this session didn't work the way we wanted but if we try again it will slowly get better Baby." Jasper says

"I'm sorry Jasper but all this session has proved to me is that I don't want to be or need to be a submissive ever again. If you need that then I wont stand in your way but I wont stay around either. I love you but I just can't do that for you. You need to understand that I won't be going into the "pain room" again either as Mistress or a sub." I say this then kiss his lips get up and run home.