A/N: So I didn't reach my goal of beating the reviews, so even though I have been sitting on this chapter for like three days, I decided to just give up the ghost and post it. You folks have been more than gracious in your reviews even though I have made several dozen of you cry, throw things and downright hate me for tearing our favorite two some apart.

If you didn't already know, I have a blog: coldplaywhore . blogspot . com (remove the spaces, folks) and I plan to post a teaser for Chapter 27 there tomorrow. So follow me… comment… all that fun shit. I tease for all my stories there.

Thanks to the usual crew, Tilly Whitlock, Kiki Enigma, MaggieMay14, Risbee, Beegurl13 and even you flightlessbird11 who is still on wussperv duty, so you have been forewarned. You may need tissues or rotten fruit to throw at me. I like bananas. (See… there's a penis euphemism. I love me a good penis euphemism.)

I don't own Twilight, I do now have a garbage can lid I use a shield to keep some of you at bay.

EPOV

"Edward, are you going to MacDougall's lab this afternoon?" called the voice of my exasperating sort of roommate, Victoria. I had agreed to let my friend and former classmate James move in to my rental house near campus in early September, but had I known at the time that along with him came Victoria, I never would have considered it.

"Of course I'm going Victoria," I replied loudly and somewhat snidely as I walked down the hallway and into my bedroom, closing the door firmly behind me. Victoria was one of the most annoying and overachieving people in my entire year, and what made matters worse was the fact that she wanted to go into medicine as well; so she was ten times more competitive with me. Of course it made our situation infinitely worse that during my first few weeks at Dartmouth, over three years ago, she had tried to start something with me, flirting constantly and whispering obscene things in my ear during a lecture, but I wasn't interested. Thankfully, she was quick to move on and ended up dating James during our second year and the rest, as they say, is history.

I still had almost three hours until the scheduled lab was due to begin, so when I stepped into my room, I grabbed my sneakers and undressed from my signature Dartmouth sweats that I wore like a badge of honor, to put on a pair of loose fitting shorts and a t-shirt, so that I could go for a run. When I crossed the front hallway, adjusting my earphones as my iPod rested on my arm band, Victoria looked at me with complete surprise.

"You're going to be late for class you know," she stated rudely as she held a tape recorder in front of her mouth and had her finger down on the pause button. Whenever she studied she liked to take verbal notes so that she could listen to them later or in her sleep, which made me laugh out loud the first time she told me this. If there was one person who loved to hear herself talk, it was Victoria Townsend. "Every time you go out for a run, you come back like an hour later than you mean to."

"You'd think that you'd be encouraging this madness Victoria. After all, if I was out of the way, wouldn't you have a clear shot to that summer internship?" I questioned haughtily as Victoria rolled her eyes and mumbled something under her breath about me being a 'conceited asshole'. "That's what I thought. Now stay out of my business and I will stay out of yours."

With that, I took off out the front door and down the steps of our small two bedroom house, enjoying the slightly cool New Hampshire air on my skin as I began running down the street and towards a nearby park, which had running trails throughout the dense woods that surrounded it. In the past few years, since I got to Dartmouth, running had become a passion of mine. It helped me to take my mind off of everything, and I had to admit the running trails through the park reminded me a bit of Forks, with their thick dark brush and oversized pine trees.

Life in New Hampshire had been a difficult adjustment at first, but three years later, life was finally comfortable for me.

After graduation, I ended up taking a road trip out here with my father to get settled and get my mind in the right frame of mind. Before he left, he told me that his car was staying with me and he was flying home, my mother convincing him to buy a new car for them and making life easy for me in Hanover now that I had my own car to get around. I had sold my Volvo for a few grand before I left, wanting the money more than the rusty old car that was filled with memories of my past.

My parents and I had grown apart a little bit in months leading up to my move out east. My mother hadn't approved of the way things between Bella and I had ended, and she continued to be friends with her and support her through everything, but never told me any of the details. I had wanted it that way. They claimed they understood my position, but I knew they were both disappointed in me. I saw it every time they looked at me, clear as day, the sadness and frustration caused by their only child.

The last few months I spent in Forks, I had basically been a secluded version of my former self. I went to school, I studied and often times Jasper or Emmett would come over, but not for very long. After all, they had girlfriends and lives to lead whereas I was basically just biding my time until I moved away for college. I ended up in Hanover in early July and quickly found an apartment and a full time job for the summer, working for the Parks and Recreation department in town. I ended up making several good friends, but when my first semester started up, I was completely overwhelmed with the work load and I went back to being secluded from everyone, since school was my primary focus.

James was actually the first real friend I made at school because it turned out we both had several classes together. They were usually big lectures filled with a hundred other students, but after a while you tend to notice the same students appearing over and over again in the same seats, so one day after class we went out for coffee and that was it. I had a new friend. James was from Akron, Ohio and was used to being the big shit on campus, so coming here was a major change for him. We both went through a period of adjustment, finding it hard to find a balance between classes, parties, drinking and girls. Well the girls were more for James and the drinking for me.

"Dude, you are in my human biology class with Professor Witters right?" questioned a rather lanky looking blonde kid who couldn't have been much older than me, asked on a Monday morning. He was wearing a pair of faded blue jeans and a t-shirt that said 'I'm not a geek! I'm a level 12 Paladin', which had made me laugh the first time I had seen him wear it a little over a week ago. I had seen him around in various classes and lectures of the past few weeks, but had thought nothing of him until he walked up to me outside of the Gilman lecture hall, as we waited for our next class. "You aren't like a mute are you?" he asked again, with a rather rude wave of his fingers.

"No, I'm not a mute," I snapped angrily. I already had a shitty morning because I had received a phone call from my mother letting me know that Bella had gotten out of the hospital the day before. I pretended to shrug it off, acting like I didn't really care, but in actuality I was really happy for her. Of course I would never tell anyone that. In fact, it was very rare that my mother talked about her, figuring that it was probably best for my emotional state if we didn't discuss it, but I knew they were still close and that my mother went to visit her whenever she could. I shook my head from the thoughts of my past and tried to focus on the present. "Yeah we have human bio together. I think we also have microbiology together too.

"Cool. Now I have someone to cheat off of. I'm James. James Bond," he said with a welcome laugh and I couldn't help but smile. This guy certainly knew how to break the ice with a complete stranger and I felt at ease in his presence. He would probably be able to go far in politics or something of the like, I laughed to myself.

"Well James Bond. I'm Edward Cullen. Bond isn't really your last name is it? If so, that is just mean. It's like your last name being Newton and you call your son Dwayne." I questioned as James shrugged his shoulders and then let out a loud laugh when he realized the absurdity of my comment.

"Dwayne Newton? Shit, that's classic," James said with a genuine smile that actually reminded me a bit of Emmett, minus the crater sized dimples that Emmett rocked.. "Actually it's Bondstein, but I don't exactly look like your stereotypical Jewish kid do I? There's no Jew fro, I'm not a particularly big fan of matzo and to be honest… who the fuck likes kugel?"

"What the hell is kugel?"

"It's like… fuck its gross. Perhaps it's just my mother's that is disgusting, but it's kinda like pasta, with raisins and cinnamon. It's like half Italian, half Jew. Steer clear my friend, steer clear."

After that initial exchange, we quickly became inseparable and when James changed his major half way through his second year, much to the disappointment of his mother Laura, who took great pride in letting the people of Akron know that her son James was studying to be a doctor, we hung out as much as we could even though we didn't have classes together anymore. So when he asked to move in, it was a no brainer for me because I needed a roommate to split the cost of rent and I wanted my friend to hang out with, until Victoria started making more frequent appearances and one weekend while I was locked in the library, I came home to find most of her shit in James' room. We had a small confrontation about it, but when she offered to pay her portion of the rent and said she would be quiet most of the time, I relented.

Fuck, was she wrong about being quiet. The girl was on my case so often it was like living with my mother again, but worse, because at night whenever I was trying to sleep I got the pure joy of listening to her and James have sex and this completely supported my theory that she was never quiet. Even during sex the girl was like a fucking hyena on crack and I was glad I never hooked up with her back in first year.

I turned the corner as I ran down Maple Street towards my favorite park and was welcomed by a big gust of cold air. It was early April and we were on the verge of starting exams, so running was the best thing I could to do clear my mind and prepare myself for the upcoming marathon study sessions. As I got going again, I passed a woman walking her small white fur ball of a dog, who reminded me a lot of Mrs. Jameson, my high school health teacher. Well, without the blatant sexuality and crass mouth, of course. I slowed to a jog and for a moment fondly recalled the health class that had really been the catalyst for my relationship with Bella.

When I thought about Bella now, I didn't get angry like I used to, I was beyond that now. I had yet to have a serious relationship since I arrived at college, choosing to have protected sex instead with a few random girls during drunken nights at various parties. None of the encounters ended up being even remotely fulfilling for me and usually ended with me cursing myself for having no willpower the next day.

James liked to point out that I never once had a brunette, wondering if I had some sort of aversion to them, but I just laughed off it off, claiming I didn't notice, but of course to me it was just another reminder of Bella, and I tried to avoid all reminders of hr during the first few years in New Hampshire.

There had been Tanya the rather busty blonde who called me constantly for almost a month afterwards, clearly not getting the point of a one night stand. Charlotte had been the red head from Boston who still had a hint of an Irish accent even though it had been years since she moved from Ireland with her parents and my favorite and most regular 'friend with benefits' had been Heidi. She was a tiny thing, no bigger than Alice, with blonde hair that she always kept back in a ponytail. She had no aversion to our situation and knew exactly what I needed and wanted, never once asking for more. It only helped matters that she used to be a gymnast and was extremely flexible during our frequent sexual escapades.

"Hi," she said breathily into my ear as I accepted a red Solo cup of beer from James at a party held by some of his new classmates during our second year. James was now a political science major and was flourishing in his new classes. It didn't hurt matters that some of his classmates were really cute.

"Hey," I replied, trying to sound cool, bust most likely failing miserably. "I'm Edward."

"Heidi. I don't think I've ever seen you at one of these poly-sci parties before, I would have remembered," she stated as she looked at me through her long dark eye lashes and I tried to give her the once over as covertly as possible. Long blonde hair, small lithe body, decent sized breasts. She would do, I thought to myself with a small smirk.

"I'm here with a friend actually. I'm pre-med," I replied as Heidi's eyes lit up for a moment. Oh god, please don't tell me she is anything like Tanya and is simply at Dartmouth to land herself a doctor or politician for a husband.

"Pre-med, that's impressive. Are you leaning towards a specific specialty?" she asked coolly and I was caught off guard that she seemed to know anything at all about medicine. "I see that look in your eye, but I promise I'm not a stalker or anything. My dad is an ob/gyn back in California, so I know a thing or two about medicine."

So began my first interactions with Heidi. We ended up back at my small apartment that night, having the most awkward sex of my life, even more so than I had with Bella our first time. However the things this girl could do with her mouth superseded the fact that I had trouble getting it up initially, until my mind began to recall images of Bella during our own sexual encounters. The way my name fell from her lips, how perky her nipples were before I even touched them and the way her back arched as she came. I felt like shit for needing thoughts of another girl to finish the job, but Heidi got hers, so she didn't seem to care. The following morning, Heidi was quick to reassure me that she wasn't looking for anything serious once I told her I didn't do relationships.

"You've had your heart broken huh?"

"You could say that," I replied caustically as she gave me as tentative smile and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "I'd rather not discuss it though."

"Just so you know, you're not alone. I came here specifically to get away from someone who is still back home. I mean, you can't get any farther from California than New Hampshire right?" she laughed genuinely and I kissed her temple lightly.

"I'm from a small town outside of Seattle. If Florida had more Ivy League schools I probably would have gone there to distance myself further from my past."

"Did you go home in the summer?" she questioned as I shook my head in the negative and she climbed out of my bed and began to get dressed. "Me neither. I couldn't do it. He's with someone else now and I just couldn't… It's hard you know? Shit, of course you know."

I watched with rapt attention as Heidi finished dressing and then found a scrap piece of paper on my desk and wrote on it before handing it back to me. "Thanks," I mumbled honestly as she smiled from ear to ear before releasing my hand and the paper.

"Call me if you ever need to talk or want a repeat performance. Once you get your mind off of back home, you'll feel ten times better. Plus, I never got to show you all my moves, handsome." I nodded my head and easily accepted a small kiss from her before she made her way out the door.

I never once thought when I brought Heidi home that I would find a fuck buddy and a confidant, but that was exactly what she became to me. It was actually refreshing to sit down and discuss my failed relationship with Bella and the strained situation with my parents, but she encouraged it and opened up to me about her own issues in the process.

A few times a month we would go out for dinner, talk about everything under the sun and nothing was considered taboo. I told her in great detail about Bella's relapse into leukemia and my reaction, for which she smacked me upside the head and may have punched me in the arm a few times. She was understanding of the situation, even if she thought I went about everything the wrong way and was a complete jerk. In hindsight I knew this, but it was too late now to do anything about it. Usually once dinner was over; we would go back to one of our apartments and have crazy no holds barred sex. It was primal, needy, and I learned things from Heidi that I didn't even know you could do, but it wasn't what I wanted. It was just a means to an end; a way to prevent me from getting carpal tunnel and fucking up my future as a doctor.

I picked up the pace as I crossed School Street and made my way into Pine Knolls Park, my feet moving as fast as they could as I made my way over to the wooded trail. The familiar noises in the forest and the sound of branches and leaves crunching beneath my feet were most welcome as 'Remember the Name' by Fort Minor came through my ear phones, bringing new energy to my run. I had stopped listening to anything remotely close to country music the moment I had left Forks and I had to admit it was thrilling to leave all traces of my former life behind me. Sure, I made it home for Christmas and for a week during the summer, but during that time it was rare that I left my parents house, choosing to spend time with them instead of anyone else. I was also scared to cross Bella's path, even though my mother assured me that it was probably unlikely, I wasn't taking any chances.

Every now and then I would hear from Emmett or Jasper, but it was usually via email or text. We had grown distant in the few months before I left Forks, so it was understandable that our lack of communication would continue after I left for college. Jasper has decided to stick around and attend Olympic College in Seattle to work towards his associates' degree in fire service, deciding he wanted to be a firefighter. Emmett had left for California to go to USC with Rosalie, but that was all I knew about the girls. I knew Jasper was still with Alice, but we rarely discussed them, because that would invariably bring us back to conversations about Bella and her remission, and I didn't want to discuss it or her for that matter. Out of sight out of mind, or at least that was what I kept telling myself.

As I reached the edge of the forest and was about to turn back and head home with enough time for a shower before I headed off to MacDougall's lecture, I was surprised to hear a small whimpering voice in the distance. I ran closer to the sound and was surprised to find a twenty something year old woman crouched on the ground, her hand clutching her ankle tightly.

"Are you alright?" I asked as I slowed to a walk and tentatively made my way closer to her. She looked up, her eyes red from her tears and I had to admit, she was cute. She had long brown hair and big brown eyes, and her body was in shape, probably from running constantly, but I had never seen her around here before. "Is it your ankle?"

"Ding ding ding, give the man a prize," she replied sarcastically as I rolled my eyes in response and knelt down beside her.

"Have you called someone?" I asked nervously. I had no idea why the hell I wanted to help this girl, but I did. I reached for my cell phone, but she quickly swatted it away when I offered it to her.

"Yeah, I called my sister Maggie. I'm sure she will be here any second, so feel free to leave. I'm not exactly in the mood to be attacked or killed today by a complete stranger," she said with a tentative laugh as her eyes lit up and she reminded me a bit of Bella.

"I'm Edward Cullen," I replied stoically as I extended a hand and she took it without delay. "There, now we're not strangers…"

"Siobhan. I'm Siobhan O'Brien," she answered simply as she used the palm of her hands to wipe away her left over tears from her eyes and cheeks. I lifted my hands up in defeat and when she nodded her head in agreement I moved them down to cup her ankle and see if I could tell what was wrong.

"I hope Maggie is planning to take you to the hospital because it looks like you have a broken ankle," I explained to her as she quirked her eye brow at me in suspicion. "I watch a lot of TLC," I said with a shrug of my shoulders as her soulful brown eyes grew wider. "I'm kidding. I'm pre-med over at Dartmouth."

"Well that's better than you telling me you are a mechanical engineering student I suppose," she laughed as a red Ford Focus pulled up on the edge of the nearby road and a tall redhead ran from the car at breakneck speed. "That would be Maggie."

"What the hell did you do this time?" cursed Maggie as she stopped in front of us, completely out of breath and looked from her sister over to me. "Oh and who is this?"

"I'm Edward. I just happened to find your sister during my run. I think she has a broken ankle and should be taken to the emergency room," I stated as Maggie's eyes practically bore a hole into mine, since she was staring at me so intensely. "Do you want my help getting her into your car?"

"What? Huh? Oh yes… my car," stammered Maggie as Siobhan rolled her eyes at her sisters' confused attitude as I stood up and offered Siobhan my hand to help her up from the ground. When she was standing, I wrapped my arms under her legs and pulled her up in my arms before I began carrying her towards the small car. Maggie ran ahead of us and opened the passenger door and when I sat Siobhan down in the seat, I couldn't help the deep breath I took, inhaling her scent, which was like sunshine and tangerines. "Thanks for all your help Edward."

"You're more than welcome ladies. Stay off that ankle Siobhan and get to the hospital," I instructed her as she gave me a tentative wave and Maggie got in the car. I waited until they pulled away from the curb before I continued my run back to the house, desperately needing to make up time if I was going to make it for MacDougall's lecture.

Two weeks later, while I was on a mid afternoon run, I got to the edge of the forest trail again and was about to turn around and head home when I noticed a familiar figure sitting on a nearby bench. She waved me over and when I got there, I was surprised to see Siobhan sitting there, crutches on her left side and a big cast wrapped around her foot. "Hey," she said sweetly as I walked towards her and looked down, assessing her cast for a moment before looking up at her face. She was smiling with a hopeful inflection that I hadn't seen on woman's face in a long time. "You were right. It was a broken ankle."

"I was right? Can you call my mother and let her know that, she thinks I am never right," I said with a nervous laugh as I suddenly began to wonder what the hell she was doing here. There was no way she just wanted to sit on a park bench in the middle of the afternoon right?

"Gladly," she said with an anxious laugh as I took a seat beside her on the bench and draped my arm over the back as I took a second to catch my breath. "Umm… I came here hoping to see you and thank you for helping me a few weeks ago."

"There's no need to thank me, really. All I did was stay with you until your sister arrived. Any concerned citizen would have done the same," I stated genuinely as she nodded her head slowly in agreement. I looked down and watched as she twirled her fingers together, a clear sign that she was nervous about something. "Ok… what else is up?"

"?" she mumbled quickly and incoherently. I quirked my eye brows at her as she covered her mouth with her hand. "I'm sorry, when I get nervous my brain stops functioning like the grad student I am."

"What makes you nervous?"

"You do."

"I do?" I asked, unable to hide the surprise in my voice. She was a graduate student, which meant she was at least two, possibly three years older than I was. How the hell was it that I made her nervous? If anything, it should have been the other way around. "Just go slow and say what it is you want to say."

"Would you like to have dinner with me this weekend?" she queried again, this time though I was able to understand every word she said and my heart ached. She looked so hopeful and excited at the prospect of me saying yes, but I knew even if I did go, nothing would come of it. I wasn't boyfriend material for anyone, that ship had long since passed for me and I wasn't looking for a repeat performance of that fuckery, so I had been keeping my distance from everyone romantically. Heidi was the girl I was closest too and that was simply because she was a great lay and could keep up a conversation with the best of them. However, as I looked over at a smiling Siobhan, I knew I couldn't hurt her.

"I'll go, if we go as friends."

"Friends is perfect. We can even split the bill if you want," she stated, her voice cracking slightly because I knew she was lying and dissapointed. She wanted more than friends. They all did, with the exception of Heidi. "How about we meet over at The Fire Hall on Saturday night, say around seven?"

"Are you sure you don't want me to pick you up?" I asked as I pointed to her cast and she simply laughed it off.

"No, I'm good. So I'll see you then?" I nodded my head and Siobhan gave me a small hug before I helped her up and she grabbed her crutches, making her way across the small park area to the Ford Focus that was parked there. I watched her until she drove away before I turned my iPod back on, Kayne West's 'Homecoming' hitting me like a ton of bricks as I began running back to my house to prepare for my afternoon exam.

Dinner with Siobhan on Saturday had been surprisingly fun. Once I got past her nervous exterior, she ended up being a really great girl who was currently doing her Masters in comparative literature. We talked for ages about her workload and how difficult life was going to be for me once I started medical school and she was very understanding. I was very honest with her throughout dinner and told her I had my heart broken and was not really looking for a relationship, but she was very persistent, insisting that we could meet again for coffee the next weekend and simply take it one step at a time.

I didn't think I did anything to get her hopes up, but as the end of May approached and Siobhan and I were on our fifth weekend 'date', which was a morning coffee date, when she broached the topic of us dating again. "Edward, don't you see that this is what we are doing already?" she questioned as I rubbed at my temples anxiously. She was a great girl and even though I enjoyed spending time with her, I felt like shit, like I had been leading her on and having her think that there was more potential with me than there really was. "Think about it Edward, we do everything a normal couple does, with the exception of the kissing and sex."

I shook my head for a moment, trying to think of the best thing to say. The song on the overhead speakers at the Coffee Pot, one of our usual haunts, changed to 'Then' by Brad Paisley and I clenched my hands tightly in anger as I recalled happier moments with Bella. Even if she claimed she didn't love me, I knew I had been in love with her, I probably still was in some way, but she didn't have the hold on my heart that she once did.

When I looked across the table at Siobhan I realized I was a heartless bastard and she was completely innocent in the situation. I had insisted that we hang out only as friends, but every week we got closer, so it was understandable that she wanted more from me. However, no matter how much I liked her, I couldn't do it. "I don't think…" I began to say as my phone started to vibrate uncontrollably on the table beside me. I knew I would ignore my phone because Siobhan and I needed to have this talk, but as I looked at the call display, I held one hand up to Siobhan, because I knew I had to answer it.

"Dad?" I questioned somberly as there was silence on the other end of the phone.

"Edward. I need you to come home. There's been an accident," he stated as I rubbed at my temple and my eyes darted up to Siobhan who looked completely confused. "It's your mom."

A/N: Yes, I am a heartless bitch and I did leave it there, but on a positive note, I have the next chapter in my inbox from my beta all ready for me to review. So… who's pissed it's been three years? Yes I did plan that time jump from the beginning, so have a little faith and leave a little review.