I know you all were hoping they would make up by now, but you got to remember that this is Professor Snape that we are talking about. Unfortunately things do not go well again for this chapter. This one is all about Hermione's detention and of course words are said and things ends up even worse for her. Don't worry. Things will eventually clear up but for now enjoy. Please leave a review!
Hermione sat in the library an hour before her detention. She was using this time to prepare herself mentally and emotionally. She didn't just use the library as a place to study and read. She used it as a quiet sanctuary to think and to be alone. Even though she was a Gryffindor, a spitfire one at that, she always needed time to be by herself and let her mind wander. She loved being with her friends in the common room, but it was always too loud and full of people. That's why she always loved the library. It was the perfect place to be and one of her favorites in the whole school. The library always had very few people and when it did they were meant to be quiet. She always got her work done in her quiet little sanctuary and no one ever bothered her, including now. She currently was sitting at her favorite spot contemplating what she was going to do about Severus. Would he even bother trying to talk to me? I know I hurt him, but he has to have some kind of sense that I didn't mean any of it. I need to find a way to make it up to him. I can't stand the way he looks at me. What happen to his beautiful dark eyes? I miss the way he looked at me with that little smirk on his face, while his eyes danced with mischief. I miss his kind words as we walked through the halls. Her mind kept cruelly reminding her of when they were happy together. As her thoughts and memories zoomed through her mind the tears started falling just as fast. She felt hopeless of the situation. She felt it was impossible to get through to him. He was so closed off and kept everyone at arm's length. He was spiteful and loved to hurt other people. She didn't see any way to change that. She brushed her tears away and looked up at the clock. It was nearly time for her to leave and she still didn't feel ready for her detention. She never even had detention before. She was always lucky enough to not be with Harry and Ron when they got detention. It made her mad that her perfect reputation of never having detention before was ruined all because she was trying to help Neville. She knew he gave her detention purposely. He wanted to hurt her and he knew she couldn't argue with him, especially in the middle of class. His authority over her unnerved her. They used to be on equal ground and now he was one step above her. She slowly stood up from her chair and stretched. She pushed in her chair and turned towards the front doors. She slowly walked to the doors of the library and waved goodbye to Madam Pince, the librarian. She opened the door and started the slow walk to her detention. To Hermione it felt like the walk of shame. She walked with her head down and her hands started to sweat with nervousness. She didn't know how he was going to react to being alone with her. A part of her was hoping they can talk and find a way to make amends, but another part of her knew that was just foolishness. He wouldn't be talking to her at all. Now that he was older he never talked about his feelings. He hides himself behind a thick wall that no one can penetrate. She didn't think it was possible to break it down or at least make a crack in it. She knew she was the reason he made a wall around himself. She broke his trust and he would never let his guard down again. She was heading down into the dungeons fretting about her detention. She was nearly at the classroom when her mind started to wander again. Why does he have to be such a bastard? He looks at me like I'm scum underneath his boots. All I did was help Neville with a damn potion and then he just had to make me roll up my sleeves. He knows I can't show that to other people. I guess Dumbledore was wrong. Maybe we can't make up. She looked up from her sluggish walk when she heard quick footsteps approaching her. She saw Draco Malfoy approaching with an ugly smirk on his pale face. The way he looked at her made her nervous and unsure of herself. While trying to ignore him and pass by him calmly he pushed her up against the wall with a menacing look upon his face. He had her pinned against it and his demeanor was daring her to do something to him. In a panic she tried reaching for her wand, but he grabbed her wrist in a tight grip. She growled bravely at him, "Get off me Malfoy." What is he playing at? What does he want from me? She started to remember the fight that happen in the hallway with her and Severus's "friends." She hoped it didn't come to this again, but she was ready if needed be.
Malfoy laughed at her. "Don't worry you little mudblood. One day your kind won't exist," he cackled.
She glared at him and spit in his face. How dare he talk to me like that? What did I ever do to him? "Maybe one day ferrets like you won't either," she replied with a smirk of her own. In retaliation Malfoy slapped her across the face leaving a red handprint on her cheek. She responded with a right knee to his groin. He fell to the floor grabbing at himself and cursing.
She walked around his body and said, "Serves you right you jerk." She got to the classroom and stared at the large door in front of her. She was scared. She didn't want to go inside, but she knew she had to. She couldn't keep him waiting any longer. She lifted up her hand and knocked on the door hesitantly. She waited patiently feeling nervousness creep up inside of her. She finally heard him say loudly "Come in." She walked inside and closed the door behind her. She looked at him nervously as he continued to write on a piece of paper. After a few minutes ticked by he finally looked up at her.
He looked up from his papers and stared at her with malcontent. He said darkly, "You're late Ms. Granger."
She cringed slightly and she didn't even attempt to respond to that. She knew there was no point on telling on Malfoy. Slytherin's stick together no matter what. She also knew that there was no point of bringing up the past. He obviously did not care and she didn't want to even attempt to upset him even more than he already was. Instead she asked him hesitantly, "What do you want me to do tonight?" Please don't be anything gross or mean. It will probably be something very tedious.
He replied slowly, "Rearrange my store room."
She grimaced slightly in response and said, "Yes sir." She walked into his store room and started on the bottom. She crouched down and began the slow process of organizing his ingredients. I knew it was going to be something as tedious as this. You could have just used a damn spell to arrange it. I swear he must do this purposely to torture all his students who get detention because there is no way he keeps this all unorganized just to have a student rearrange it. Why is Malfoy acting the way he is? Does he know something that I don't know or is this just him being the prat he is? She finished the bottom shelf and started on the next one. This is so stupid. I wonder if he even has the same feelings for me as he did when he was younger. Most likely not knowing that I caused all his rage and anger. I need to apologize even though it isn't necessarily my fault. She peeked her head out and saw him grading papers again. She watched him for a few minutes calculating what to say and when to say it. She didn't want to interrupt him or say the wrong thing. The look of concentration on his face made her smile slightly. Even now she found him attractive and her feelings for him grew.
Professor Snape said still grading the same paper, "That is not what I told you to do for your detention. Now say what you have to say and get back to work."
The smile on her face dropped and she took a deep breath. She slowly mustered up her courage. "I just want to say I'm sorry," she said softly.
He snorted and said, "You're not the only one that get's detention Ms. Granger. It happens to all of you Gryffindor's."
She frowned and said, "You know that is not what I meant." Stop acting like this.
He snapped, "Well it is too late now to apologize for that now is it?"
"It wasn't my idea," she said miserably. I'm just trying to make it up to you.
He turned his chair toward her and said, "You still went along with it. You knew what it was going to do to me and I will never forgive you."
That was the first time Hermione saw his evil Professor exterior break. She saw the pain in his eyes. She saw the anguish that she caused. She whimpered pitifully, "But I love you Severus."
Instead of cooling his anger that just made him even angrier. "That died when you left me the way you did. You couldn't warn me at all. You knew I was teetering on the edge of turning to the dark side and you never showing up again was exactly what pushed me over the edge. I did exactly what you begged me not to do. We cannot change time now. You ruined everything we had and I will not go back to that."
She stomped her foot and said, "That's not fair though. You knew I couldn't even attempt to warn you at all. Any warning could have ruined the future that was set. I begged Dumbledore to reconsider but he would not budge. I hate that I caused you to be the way that you are but I do not regret the time we had together."
"You ruined my life. My life would have been better without you in it."
"Right like you weren't already ruining it with the way you were going," she said hurtfully. His words were like a bullet to her heart. She couldn't understand why he was so hurtful.
He stood up and shouted, "Get out right now!"
"Fine I will," she said with defeat. As she was heading to the door she heard him shout, "I wish you were never in my life."
She said quietly in return, "I wish you were the Severus I knew and still can be. Merry Christmas." She left his classroom hurriedly feeling tears stream down her face. Why does he have to be so hurtful? She ran through the corridor and barely made it to the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. She hoped nobody saw her. She quickly said the password and walked into the common room. She ran up the stairs to her room and got into her bed. She wrapped herself in her covers and began to sob. Why did I even bother trying to reconcile with him? I knew he was going to be angry, but not like this. What happen to my Severus? She knew tomorrow her friends in the common room would ask her what was wrong and she would again give them a fake smile and make up an excuse. She wished she had someone that she can talk to about her feelings, but she knew she couldn't. No one would understand and Dumbledore expected her to keep it a secret. She felt alone now more than ever. She burrowed herself deeper into her warm blankets and cried herself to sleep feeling her heart break from the cruel words of her Professor.