"Alluka, Kalluto, how do you like the buffet?" Killua hummed eating pancakes.
"Kalluto, I must be going crazy." Alluka murmured, "I think.. the wind might be talking to me." She took a bite from a strawberry.
"Heh." A sneer crossed the youngest boy's lips. "Want me to take it out for you?"
An unhappy sigh escaped Killua's lips, "Come on don't be like this." The 16 year old felt hurt more than anything. He brought his family out here hoping for a good time and all he got was disrespect.
"Let's change tables." Alluka stood up and moved away.
Kalluto tuck his middle finger up, "You don't tell me what to do and the wind doesn't either." He narrowed his eyes, "I'm sitting next to the garbage where I OBVIOUSLY BELONG SINCE NO ONE CA-"
"I do CARE!" Killua slammed his fist on the table, "I DO!"
Gon watched Kalluto deliberately walk away heading towards a table NEAR the trash far away from both Alluka and Killua. The pregnant boy actually felt a bit bad, "Killua.. do you have any idea what to do right now? I mean, Chrollo might be swindling us, your parents probably want me dead, and your siblings might just turn on you."
"Don't worry about Chrollo, we'll outsmart him." Killua gulped down his food looking around the loud and noisy restaurant. He didn't feel like going into how he might solve his rocky sibling relationship right now.
"Ah, why are you like this?"
"THIS IS HOW I AM! THIS IS HOW I LIVE MY LIFE! What more do you want me to do..? Like how much longer do you want me to lie for?"
Gon stuffed more chocolate donuts into his cheeks making them puff out even more like a chipmunk. He swallowed slowly, "Don't push yourself, that makes things worse." He picked up chocolate covered fried chicken to his mouth.
"Whatever." Killua grumbled lowly. His nose wrinkling up at the absurd smells coming from Gon's plate. "So your new favorite meal is barbecue covered pancakes and chocolate on top of chicken."
"I had my doubts too. But burnt flesh is delicious," Gon scooped up some peach cobbler on a fork slathering it in honey BBQ.
"Baka! Don't say it like that."
"But that's what meat is. It's animals flesh and skin and organs and that tender meaty succulent juicy t-"
"BAKA!"
"I'm sorry, I like burnt animal flesh."
"It's just weird! Ya know how I cringe at bugs and nasty stuff." Killua quipped.
"I'm wrecking this buffet because I'm hungry as heck with zero impulse control due to pregnancy cravings." Gon winked as he licked his lips. "Go figure."
They had been here for about 2 hours or more already. Killua didn't have to go figure anything—he knew what was up. His siblings were still pissed and this wasn't boosting their spirits. Killua knew he needed to earn back their love somehow.
Letting out an ugly sigh Killua promoted, "Well I'm ready to go. Alluka and Kalluto are obviously not in the mood anymore which means I need to make em, happy."
"They can come to the mall with us. Alluka likes shopping right? That will make her happy at least. Kalluto might be satisfied too, seeing his old boss." Gon insisted nonchalantly. "However, we can't leave yet." He slowly titled his head up observing his surroundings. Steadily he gazed around before lazily humming out, "I invited Ging to come over."
An inhuman sound got caught in Killua's throat as his lip quivered with frustration. "Why the heck would you do that?"
"I called him when we got here!" Gon began to plea his point.
Killua challenged, "And he still hasn't come?" A harrowing eyebrow screwed upwards.
"No…" Gon lightly sighed. Almost as if it was dawning on him that Ging might never be coming at all.
Killua lifted up his fork and started scraping at a saucer; to hide the awkwardness of the moment, and also to prevent him from sounding like a complete asshole.
"He will come. I know he will!" The black haired male opened his lips to say more in protest but then slowly glued them together again. A shadow of almost sorrow caved on his face as he slumped back in his seat.
"Okay." Killua retorted. Half of his mind already knowing they could wait here till the end of time and Ging still not show.
"What do you mean, okay? It's for sure!"
"I said, OKAY."
"Like… like… you don't believe me, okay or Okay whatever happens, okay."
"Okay as in Okay?"
"THAT WASN'T AN OPTION!"
"Gon, I just don't want you to get hurt. Legit, let go of Ging! Whatever fire you want to," Killua drew quotation marks in the air, "rekindle" He spoke the word coldly, "Has never been there in first place."
"That's not true! When I was 14 we talked.. we bonded, we…" Gon tried to grasp the memories. Much to his disappointment his mind kept drawing up blank…..He barely had any memories he shared with Ging.
Yet that didn't stop him from wanting to make new ones.
"Face it." Killua declared, deciding he had enough of this. "He's not com—"
"Ging!" Gon cried out enthralled at the sight of his father at the door.
Killua's right eye twitched at the sight of Ging walking in. The shaggy black haired man was scratching his beard stubs as he talked to the person minding the door. Then he had the audacity to wave at Gon and Killua—LIKE HE WAS ALL BUDDY BUDDY WITH THEM.
"Hell no, this shit ain't right." Killua began to discourage shaking his head in complete revolt.
He rose to get up out his chair and blow this popcorn stand but Gon stopped him. Growling, "SIT YOUR ASS DOWN."
"But! He acts fr—" Killua's words got cut off as a muscular arm was thrown over his shoulder, and a loud booming laugh filled the air.
"Killua Zoldyck! We meet again!" Ging laughed out loud a smile plastered on his face.
Killua couldn't control his explosive reaction of, "BACK UP ASSHOLE!" He slunk down in the booth.
Ging let go in a confused way. He rubbed the back of his head in confusion, "Is that anyway to speak to your father-in-law?"
"OH MY GOD!" Killua shouted as if this sudden truth just collapsed on him.
Gon rolled his eyes at his lover's childish reactions. Soon returning focus on his dad who sat on the other side of the table. "Ging! I'm glad you made it! What took so long?" He happily smiled brightly.
"I took the bus…" The older man began to explain, collecting more material to sew together an excuse. "And it was running late." Ging summarized.
A worried expression furrowed on Gon's face. He was perplexed: Wanting to believe Ging. Their talk at the party hadn't went that bad had it? Was their still hope for them? Ging was his father. Even if Ging acted more like a cool Uncle. He was STILL someone Gon wanted to trust.
Unsettling feelings roamed in Gon's belly until, he settled on the stance of optimism. Letting his warm smile spread he patted Ging's hand in solidarity. "That's good that you came at least." He chirped cheerfully.
Wide ocean eyes flashed viciously, "You really believe that fake shit!"
"Killua! Don't use colorful language in front of my son and grandchild." Ging snapped pointing at him accusingly.
Which was awfully wild since last time Killua checked Ging didn't care not once about cursing or any crap. Ging was nothing but an insufficient waste of air. And this time Killua was going to make that clear to Gon.
"It doesn't fucking matter! Gon curses all the time!" Killua fired off his mouth, "Go ahead tell him." There was a disconnect between Killua's words and Gon's hesitation to defend him. It seemed to bring a stabbing feelings of hurt through a chilled heart. "Tell him, Gon!" Killua nagged this time in hope his command wouldn't get ignored.
Puffing out his chest, Gon blew it off. "I don't know what you're talk about… You're sounding mad stupid."
Killua's face contorted in almost pure dismay. Pink lips let loose allowing teeth to gnaw on them as he analyzed the controversy laid out before him. He couldn't believe Gon was doing this! Why did Ging even freaking matter? Taking a deep breath he looked at Gon desperate for any answer but none revealed itself.
"I'm mad stupid?" Killua repeated the ending to show how mad stupid Gon was actually sounding right now.
Ging fumbled with a napkin right in front of him. "I guess so, since you repeated it." Now the man had a sneer embedded on his lips as if he was satisfied Gon was taking his side.
Firmly Killua forced a stiff fake smile to be friendly. He barely managed to ooze out, "How funny…" without snarling and snapping his teeth.
"Oh, I don't mean to come off like this. It's just no one really told me about..." Ging's voice drifted off as if he was suddenly thrown off the know loop.
But you could never really be thrown off something if you were never on it in the first place.
"Are you hungry, Ging?" Gon asked charmingly.
"Sorta." Ging admitted.
Killua let out a really pissed off grunt at that. Ging didn't seem to mind since he was sitting right across the table in front of Killua. It was almost like he knew that Killua didn't want to look at him so he sat where he KNEW Killua would be forced to look at him.
Angrily taking a plate that was half eaten laying on the table, Killua began eating furiously. Ever spoonful of food he brought to his mouth he imagined it was him biting Ging's head off.
"I know you probably didn't pay, so you can share a plate with me." Gon offered another plate out to Ging.
"Don't offer him anything." Killua spat as he moved the plate away from Ging. He pushed his own messed over pancakes to Gon. "You're pregnant, you need to consume double calories. I read about it in that book, Chrollo gave us."
Killua had no idea in what corner of Gon's mind made him think this was a good idea. He kept pondering, 'how can I snipe this dude giving him a butter knife to the eye without potentially blinding and/or killing him.'
Ging began to crack his neck mumbling, "I was gonna eat here with y'all…" His eyes darted over to Killua humming, "To spend time with my FAMILY before I go on another adventure." He instigated making sure to clearly drive this situation home, 'Life wasn't easy. Everyone who smiles in your face isn't always your friend.' Ging knew this lesson better than anybody else; the last thing he wanted was for his son to feel the bitter heart ripping completely wrongful deadly stings of pure betrayal.
"I don't trust a word out your crusty ass lips." Killua shouted; for the first time he was overly heated, "You know you're only here because Gon wants you."
"Sure…. All the power in the world and influence the Zoldycks have. They only need us, when they want us. Other than that we're trash." Ging muttered under his breath. He then took another long gulp of air babbling, "Fucking hypocrites… "
At that Killua's mouth quivered, every bone in his body tensing up to commit murder. Proclamation rattled instinct boldly, "You know as well as I do. We live in a world were good people get kicked to the curb. You let your own son get kicked to the curb! IN HIS DARKEST HOURS HE WAS WITH ME! BECAUSE YOU NEVER DID SHIT FOR HIM!"
"I'm not denying it am I?" Ging declared screwing up an eyebrow, "I want you to stand by Gon. He obviously loves you. So stop trying to argue and get fresh with me."
"Mmm?"
"I'm not vain. I'm aware my son might not be all put together."
Gon purposely adverted Killua's confused glance, muttering, "I told him about what happened yesterday, Killua."
"WHAT?" Killua started yelling now. His booming volume caused other people turned to look at their booth. Only the sight they saw was Killua red in the face almost throwing a fit proclaiming, "BAKA! YOU THINK I NEED A PAT ON THE BACK OR SOMETHING? You think I need an encouraging speech from THIS SHIT BAG?"
"It's not like that. Do you hear me?" Gon put his hand on Killua's face endearingly. He could feel how heated the 16 year old was. So he tried to calm him, sweetly saying, "Ging is my father. He needs to know about my schizophrenia and stuff… if we're gonna address all this properly. That's what you wanted, to take care of me properly."
A spray of irritation came over Killua's face. His eyes darted between the three of them. Uncomfortably he took a deep hectic breath trying to collect his thoughts. But for some reason his mind was lost—Killua hated his parents because they didn't care about him or love him. Which made sense, right? So why did Gon love and care for his parent when Ging never did the same for him? WHY...? The answer seemed to be lost somewhere in the eyes of families glancing over at them. All of them were having a good happy time together.
Yet Killua was supposed to be with his family but he wasn't having a happy time. The only time Killua was happy was with Gon, nevertheless, there were always many trouble-some roadblocks in their relationship.
His blue eyes met another equally interesting pair of ocean blue, these belonging to Alluka. The young girl watched her big brother from across the room curiously. She mouthed the words, "Betrayal hurts doesn't it?"
Shamefully Killua hid his face in the crook of Gon's neck. Since for some reason Alluka's ice cold gaze hurt him the most out of everyone's. He felt Gon swallowing dryly, the pregnant male shifting a bit under Killua's newly added weight.
Ging frowned, "You think I want my son to have schizophrenia?" His face turned grave as he ushered, "Do you think any parent wants to hear that about their child?"
Killua grew silent figuring it wasn't in his power to speak on this. Maybe Ging did feel busted up and somber like how Killua did when he first heard the news. A bit of guilt fill him as he saw how sadly Ging shook his head in a pissed off fashion.
The man slammed his fist onto the table bellowing, "I'LL TELL YOU IT ACTUALLY MAKES ME BELIEVE WHAT PEOPLE HAVE BEEN SAYING FOR YEARS. I AM A SHITTY PARENT." The wrinkles on his forehead mashed together as he muttered, "Especially when I read that the causes could be from intense trauma or environmental triggers." Ging took an strained breath as if holding back an emotional tidal wave as he looked at Gon, "I'm sorry. Everything, life... I try to makes sense of. I go on adventures to explore and understand, but...but.. now I realize that I can't. That what she wanted for you, nothing could replace, her , she... your mom left me. It was just me, Mito and you. You were all I had left of her." Ging's breath hitched, too old and tired. Dreary after so many wasted years, eyelids sagged shamefully, "This is probably my fault. It's also gonna be my fault if…"
"It is your fault!" Killua blurted out, feeling more upset than before mostly because he assumed Ging was over here trying to plead charity case with them. "IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT GON IS LIKE THIS!" He made sure to stain that fact into Ging's brain so the man could feel the fire of guilt sting him. "And… and.." Pissed off tears blurred his vision, "It's all your fault too if something is wrong with our child! Something wrong... with MY FAMILY! ALL YOU!"
"Killua!" Gon began to halt the accusations.
"IT IS!" A few droplets rolled down Killua's face as he glared at Ging angrily, "YOU RUINED GON'S LIFE! YOU GAVE HIM BAD GENES! THE DAMN CODES THAT..."
He wasn't about to break down here, but he was so damn mad.
The man who ruined his family was right in front of him. There was so much Killua wanted to say and do...
"She ruined Gon's life." Ging corrected under his breath. "I loved her. But that also killed her in the end." He finally blinked over to Killua lecturing, "Do you understand now, the responsibility of loving my son?"
Killua was too stressed out to wear a face of absolute bafflement. Crystals shifting uncomfortably in their sockets as they gazed around. His head hurt with a special, 'each breath you take urks' just whizzed through him—and separation driving a wedge between them was undeniably wide.
"For Gon? I would go all the way." Killua declared firmly. He was more disgusted than ever with the audacity of the man before him. It made his chest get a fuzzy feeling. Anger? Resentment? Hopelessness? Impossible.
Impossible to comprehend one another.
"Good. Because one day you'll have to make a split second descion..." The older man huffed as if it took a lot to gulp down his pride and confess, "Don't make the wrong decision like me."
Gon's heart throbbed lightly as he tensed up feeling heavily the melody of words that appeared to be singing, "Remember happiness, remember good times. Just know, even if you love someone with all your heart, emotions are just petty things that come and go. So in the end someone will always get hurt." How the different tune layed yonder in smooth undertone could be the work of voices, however that conclusion was difficult to draw.
Those brown old-owlish eyes Ging had locked onto Gon like he was the beginning and end of his legacy. As if there was more knowledge and stuff he wanted to test Killua on before letting his offspring free. Time waited for none and words most of the time were best left unspoken. The longing was better anyway~thinking about what one should have said during the confrontation.
Killua spat bitterness, "Sure." Stupid Ging who hasn't done anything for Gon. Stupid Ging who didn't deserve to be called a father.
There was a strange silence after that almost as if there was no way to spark up conversation. Blood shot eyes interlocked with each other, as sorrow oozed it's way from solemn compassion.
Gon bit his lip, a voice in his head uttering, "And that's how that go." Another voice gave a quick reminder, "But ya know they bonded over the fact you're crazy right?"
Raising his fork up, Gon started chewing on some more food trying to savor the flavor and ignore these weird emotions running through his mind when he heard the voices talk. He didn't wanna think they were bonding over his craziness, he wanted to think that Ging and Killua were bonding because they both loved and cared about him.
Killua felt Gon's uneasiness and placed a hand on his stomach. He started rubbing their little princess from under the table. Killua whispering gently, "This hurts now. It will always hurt and even if you cannot overcome it, that's okay too." A lil smirk tugged on his lips, "But if you want I'll punch his face inwards."
"Don't do that." Gon mumbled. A new fear filling him—DNA. His genes, the genetic code that his Aunt had scolded him for taking after Ging so much. Would his princess get schizophrenia too just because Gon had it? Did she have a higher chance of having problems because of him?
"Yes." The voices answered, "there is probably a 10% chance."
Lowering his brown eyes, he peeked at the protrusion of his stomach. Their little angel seemed to have grown overnight (or maybe it was because he had just eaten so much). A burst of relief filled Gon as he saw Killua's hand resting on top of their child.
Killua was here for him. And their child was here because of him.
"Don't worry about our little one." Killua pressed a kiss on Gon's head mumbling, "She's strong and healthy." His white hair brushed against peach skin as they grew nearer.
"I hope." Gon pulled himself closer to Killua. The warm radiating off his chest spreading throughout his entire being as he got so close up in the older male's face. Their nose gently touching delicately as Gon spoke out the million dollar question, "Is the reason you get all upset and defensive because your own family uses you so you lost the meaning of contentment?"
Just like that the whole entire atmosphere changed in a matter of seconds. Killua dropped his cool and collected attitude in exchange for suddenly becoming a babbling weak minded star crossed lover. His pale cheeks switched to red as he let his hand fall off of Gon's stomach and he began to rant, "Baka! Don't light a fire you can't put out!"
Ging screwed up an eyebrow yet he found it hard to deny the scene before him. There was no rejecting that Gon and Killua might be an unstable match, but Ging also saw clearly that there was no place for him here. He wasn't wanted here.
Just like how he wasn't wanted with Gon when he was just a baby.
It almost made the older man's eyes water looking at the resembling details.
"He only thinks he needs me." Ging confirmed to himself. He said it lowly as he felt almost shame wash over him. Barely managing a smile, long as Gon was happy.
Ging scooted out of the booth, "I'm leaving on my next adventure since the Hunters thing is over."
All the cheer dropped from Gon's face, "R-really? What.. what about Aunt Mito?"
"I'll be sure to visit her soon. She's in the hospital on Whale Island?" Ging cracked a little joke, as he began to walk away. "I'm sure she's not going anywhere."
Blinking his hot and angry tearful eyes rapidly, the color drained from Gon's face. HE COULDN'T BELIEVE GING HAD FREAKING SAID!
"Let him go." Killua grabbed Gon's arm locking him in place, preventing the upset male from exploding. Whispering softly in the noisy air, "He's not worth it. He was NEVER really worth anything."