I do not own anything in the Twilight universe, I only wish I did.

Regrets Get In The Way

It was in the dead of night, as Embry and Quil patrolled the east border. Both of them quiet. Embry was lost in thoughts of second guessing. Each day made the anxiety build, until his insides twisted into knots. The "What If 's" hit him in rapid succession. While Quil's thoughts were his own doubts, picking at his wall of defense, eating away the mortar that held it together. Everyone pretended to have good spirits around him, but they couldn't lie convincingly in the pack mind. They thought that she was dead. And each day with no news, seemed to make it that much harder to fight them. The other pack members as well as his own doubts. If only they had some news, some hint that she was still alive. But his dreams were silent. At least when they were not nightmares. They tortured him, with visions of Claire being beaten, bitten and mutilated by those damn leeches. Upon waking from each one, he promised himself, that he would not try to reach her that way again, but just to have the chance to see her again, gave him the strength to try one more time.

They were so lost in their thoughts, they missed the group of leeches, until they stumbled upon them. Embry alerted the others, of the location for backup. There must have been a dozen or more. Never, had he seen so many travel in one group, unless he counted the Volturi encounter. Come to think of it there was a familiar scent to them, that tied them to that memory. " Hey, do you smell that?" Embry turned to Quil, but he was no where near him. "Not smart Quil! Wait for backup, man. It's suicide," But Quil wasn't listening as usual. Embry was afraid that, that was just what he wanted. Torn between helping Quil, in the kamikaze mission, and beating Quil himself, he pounced into the middle of the battle. Claws and teeth filled his vision. He screamed for backup and he heard the pack's reply that they were on their way.

At one point, Quil had a leech by the throat, he was ripping into the flesh, tearing off pieces bit by bit and flinging it in the air with vicious jerks. So engrossed in his work that he missed the other four who were stalking his movements. Facing certain death, Embry leaped to stop the massacre. Everything was a mass of talons and teeth. He was twisted and turned in the tornado as he fought, to the best of his ability. He got in a few lethal blows, as the enemy's numbers dwindled. Still Quil fought with no self preservation. When this was over, Embry was relishing the thought of kicking the shit out of him. That was when he was caught in a leeches death grip. He tried to twist away and get up underneath him, but he was trapped. His last conscious thought, as he felt his throat ripped out was, regret that he wouldn't get his chance after all.

Sam arrived in the clearing to see the mass of bodies, blood and gore in heaps upon the shadowed forest floor. The pack descended upon the scene in full battle mode. Jacob was the first to stumble upon Embry's lifeless body. He screamed for the other's attention as he nuzzled his best friend, frantically checking for any signs of life. "Sam come quickly!! Help me. Oh God somebody help me!!" Jacob, no longer concerned with his own safety, phased so he could use his hands properly. The blood poured out of the hideous wound at his throat. He tried to find a another pressure point to check his pulse, as he covered the massive wound to try to stop the flow of blood.

Sam came from the throng and phased as well. He bent down to see for himself, but Jake was everywhere, twisting over Embry's body, frantically trying to help him. "Sam I can't feel a pulse, I can't tell if he is breathing when he is phased. Tell me what to do. Fix it! Do something!" Jacob continued to scream nonsense as Sam pushed him away to see for himself. The others gathered around them, when the last of the leeches fell to the earth. Their expressions were filled with the unthinkable horror before them. Quil was the last to notice the crowd surrounding his friend. Numbly he moved forward, on the outskirts of the circle.

Sam commanded Embry to phase to better inspect him. Even unconscious, his body was forced to obey and he phased before them. Now it was easier to see that he was indeed still breathing, his chest moving to the shallow breaths that pushed it up and down. His wound was slowing slightly. Sam wondered if there was any blood left in him, so much covered the outside of his body, and the surrounding ground around him.

Holding the pressure over his throat, he gave the order for several of the pack to clean up the site, and take care of the bodies. He told Jake, Seth and Quil to help him take Embry to the Cullen's house to get him some medical help, trying not to think that it might be too late. The others phased and helped him carry the boy, while Sam continued to apply pressure. Jacob's eyes were accusing, as they bore into Quil's guilty ones.

"Why didn't you wait man? Do you care as little for your brother's safety as you do your own?" Quil had no answer for him, as waves of guilt and regret washed over his numb mind. This could not be happening. He never would want this to happen to anyone, much less his best friend.

" It's going to be ok, we just got to get him to the Cullens. Carlisle will fix him. You hold on man. You can do it Embry." Seth continued to chant like a cheerleader, while Jacob prayed silently and Quil started making deals.

God, if he makes it, I promise that I'll stop fighting them. I'll stay in the game. I won't complain anymore. I'll do what I'm told. Oh God please.... Please!

" Please, please. This is all my fault. All my fault." Quil's eyes raked over Embry's too still body, lying in their arms. Jacob refused to let him off the hook, and continued to stare at him with disdain.

" If anyone can fix him, it's Carlisle. You'll see. He'll be as good as new in no time. Wait and see." Seth assured them, then started mentally calling out to Edward to alert Carlisle that he was about to receive a critically wounded patient. Time was of the essence and the more prepared he was, the better.

" I am so glad that you're back Leah. Everyday that you were gone, I had to put up with Rocky pushing me around. Now that you're back, he will go back to his old routine, and I'm off the hook." Leah looked at the roly poly waitress in front of the bathroom mirror, as she adjusted her mini apron over her too tight black slacks. Leah pulled her hair back into a pony tail, and straightened her uniform. So far she had been lucky, and missed Rocky's welcome home. It was like his hands multiplied anytime she was in his vicinity. With a critical eye that missed very little, Linda asked with an inquiring voice, "Sooo tell me how was it, seeing your ex after all this time?" Leah looked away from her intrusive gaze and fidgeted with the apron ties.

" You know, like it wasn't so bad. Time heals and all that jazz." Thoughts of Embry flashed across her mind, like it did ever since she left him in the forest. Instantly her body heated and her stomach twisted in tortured butterflies. It was like she left a large part of herself there with him. She could feel his phantom lips burning into her skin. "It wasn't so bad." Linda stepped toward her, to get a better look. When she captured her gaze, she saw something hidden in their depths. With a knowing look, she shook her head and exclaimed, " I knew it, you got back together! You've got that look. I knew it!' Leah frantically shook her head and interrupted, " No, NO! You've got it wrong. I did not get back together." She grabbed the other woman's hands that were waving in the air. "Linda I did not get back together with Sam, her eyes demanded that the other woman stop and believe her.

Less certain now, she continued, " Well something happened, while you were there, you are positively glowing like a Christmas tree. If it wasn't Sam, it had to be someone else. Who Leah?" Leah started to protest, but it died on her lips, as images of the last few days, that she was with him, continued to flash before her eyes. His arms, his lips, his hands.....

" I did get together with someone, while I was there." She still could not meet the other woman's eyes. Linda waited for more information. Leah hesitantly continued. "I've known Embry all my life, but not in that way before. I was taken by surprise."

"Sooo was it just a fling or what? Will you see him again, or was it a one night stand?" Leah looked at herself in the mirror and tried to answer the questions that had been burning in the back of her mind since she took off.

"I don't know..." They were interrupted from any further heart to heart chat, by a deep pounding on the restroom door. Both jumped, Linda screaming as if in a horror movie. "Hurry up in there, I'm not paying you to take a dump!" Linda looked at Leah and laughed, " He has such a way with words. I love his people skills." Leah checked her hair in the mirror one last time.

As she turned to face the door, her vision blurred and for a moment, she was no longer in the restroom. She was in a familiar clearing. Quil was in front of her, tearing into a leech. They were everywhere. Why didn't he wait for backup. Did he have a death wish? Lately that was all he had. When this was all over I am going to kick the shit out of him. She tensed her hind legs to get the strength behind her leap to help protect his worthless hide.

"Leah are you ok, baby speak to me." Leah looked up, light haloed Linda's chubby face as she slapped her awake. Rocky barged into the restroom, "Look the breakfast crowd is in full swing, I need my waitresses on the floor now." His speech slowed as he took in Leah's prone body on the floor. "What are you doing down there?"

Linda gave him a disgusted look, " Well what do you think she's doing, sweeping the floor with her butt? She fainted. Don't just stand there, like a bump on a log, help her up." It took both of them to get her to her feet. Her legs were rubbery and her head still swam with the double images of the restroom and the clearing. And she wasn't as agile as normal, so she couldn't avoid all of Rocky's tentacles. Only he would be so low as to cop a feel on someone recovering from a faint.

Rocky looked at her uncertainly, "Uhh are you going to be ok? Cause the restaurant is full today, and if I need to call Tracy in I need to do it now." Awe, Rocky, always thinking of his people first. Leah assured him that she was going to be just fine. She just wanted to sit for a moment. At first, Rocky looked like he was going to protest, but then someone came in to use the restroom and Linda ushered him out .

Leah sat down on a sofa chair, rested her weary head in her hands. Tears slipped through her closed eye lids, as the vision faded. She didn't want to feel the way it felt to be phased. But the images were so real, she could smell the damp earth beneath her paws, and she could feel the breeze against her fur. She felt her muscles tense as she leaped into the battle fray.

"Leah if you're better, you've got people at station 1, 3 and 7." He was all heart. It was a wonder that he made any money at all, catering to his employees like he did. As she got up, her vision blurred again, but just for a moment. She supported herself on the arm of the chair, and then made her way to the sink. She washed her hands and then went to her tables. As she opened the door, she wished Embry was here with her. Never had she felt safer, than when she was in his arms. The visions left her afraid and unstable, like she had lost touch with reality.

When her gaze met the length of room her eyes rested on her rescue. She didn't know how he found her, but there he was. And it didn't matter, that she was the one, that ran away from him. He was here. Right before her eyes. It was as if all of her troubles, all of her fears melted. It was as if she could lay all of her burdens down. Her heart was lighter than it had ever been. She was flying. She was soaring... It all made sense to her now. Her meaning in life, why she was born, it was for this moment, for him... He was her life, and everything else did not matter. She ran to him, all else forgotten and she grabbed his back, all of her love in her embrace. The man, taken by surprise, turned in her arms. Her gaze turned up into the stranger's face.

Leah froze, halted by her confusion. She swore that it was Embry. He smiled at her, with a smile that only Embry could have given her. Then the double vision cleared and she saw the stranger for who he was, just a stranger. A hand jerked her away from the man, who didn't seem to mind the attention. However his wife was having a fit. Rocky approached, his anger barely contained as he apologized for his waitress's actions, and gave a flimsy excuse about her being sick. Leah turned to do her own apology, when she was hit by a sharp pain in her throat. She clutched her neck as her vision dimmed again.

Damn, where was Quil? Guys I need you now! Just great I never thought it would end like this. I wish that I told her.... I wish I ….

"Leah, Leah can you hear me?" Rocky was now over her, fear all over his face. Linda was next to him. "Rocky, do you think that she's having some kind of seizure? Should we call an ambulance or something? I don't think she breathing. Did she swallow her tongue?" Rocky waved her questions away as he tried to slap her awake. Leah watched it all with unmoving eyes. Although she was paralyzed on the outside, her mind was screaming for release. It all made sense in a hysterical way. The visions were not her own, but she was looking through Embry's eyes, and the throat ripped out was not her own but Embry's. And she didn't know if it had already happened or was about to happen. All she knew was that she had to go to him now. No hell or high water was going to keep him from her. As she tried to sit up, the room tilted from side to side. Still clutching her aching throat, she choked out that she had to go. Rocky tried to hold her down, but her wolf strength kicked in and as she pushed, he flew backward hitting a table. He tried to recover his dignity, by catching himself before he did a backflip.

Leah righted herself and made for the kitchen area to get her purse. Linda caught up with her as she hit the parking lot. "Do you think it's wise to be driving, so soon after your seizure, or whatever it was, that you had? Do you need a ride to the hospital. Screw Rocky, I can take you." Leah assured her as she started her sorry excuse for a car. Over the backfire, she said, "Tell Rocky to send my last paycheck to the emergency address on file. I'm going back to La Push." Linda looked into Leah's eyes, that although were filled with panic, now had a purpose in them as well.

She patted her on the arm, " You go girl, don't let anyone stand in the way of your dreams. Send me a postcard. And an invitation." She leaned away from the window and stepped back as Leah let loose in the parking lot and sped onto the highway.

As she made for the interstate, she reached into her purse for her phone. She tried home first. All she got was the answering machine. Next she tried Emily's but she got no one. When she tried Jake, she was informed that she was out of minutes. She threw the phone in disgust. She was out of money. She probably didn't have enough gas money left in her account. Frustration ate at her, not knowing how she was going to get home, and why wasn't anyone answering their phones. She needed answers, and she wanted them now. "Embry just hold on. Just hold on."

I just got back from my trip to Disney and my head is full of princesses and princes in shining castles. Hopefully it will reflect in my story. The next few chapters should tie everyone together. Time to bring in the bad guys.