Thank you Call (I can understand busy sorry to bug) Angel,Laila and shirozero for your reviews of the last chapter you guys rock thanks to those who read but can't review still love you. I am really digging still into you by Paramore so I think I might incorporate it in here soon.

The three of them just sit there in Randy's room watching him hoping that at any moment that his eyes will pop open and he will say something to them but they all know that it could take days or even weeks for him to wake up. John really hopes it doesn't take weeks for him to wake he just wants to see his beautiful eyes and he would give anything to hear his voice. He always had the sexiest voice that just drove him crazy it was actually quite funny that a man of his size and demeanor was shaken by the sound of this one man and you wouldn't believe it if he told you until you saw it for yourself. However this was one of their secret things that he treasured nobody would get to really see the way that he affected him. He is so lost in thought that he doesn't hear the nurse knocking on the door to his room.

"How is everybody doing?"

"Not too bad."

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news but visiting hours are over and only one of you is allowed to say the others have to go for tonight I just have to check his vitals and then I will leave you guys alone so you can decide."

With this the blonde nurse quickly checks his vital signs to make sure that he is still stable she hooks up another IV to the machine and then pushes a button the clear liquid in the bag begins to flow down into his arm and he can't help but wonder what the clear stuff is he decides to ask later if he gets to stay. Then she smiles at them and makes her way out of the room as soon as the door closes Elaine looks at Bob then at John.

"I think he should stay tonight honey."

"Yeah I think your right."

"Are you guys sure I mean he is your son."

"Of course were sure you are his fiancé and if he wakes up you should be the first one he sees. We will be here first thing in the morning if you need anything before then please don't hesitate to call us okay."

"I will thank you that means a lot."

"Of course goodnight John."

"Good night Bob and Elaine."

Bob stands and shakes his hand before Elaine pulls him into a hug then they leave the room closing the door behind them he sits back down and grabs Randy's hand again. The same blonde haired nurse knocks on the door before peeking inside she gives him a small smile before she enters the room.

"So you are the one staying?"

"Yeah."

"Would you like some water or a blanket and pillow?"

"Actually all the above would be great."

"Okay I will go get them for you."

"Great thank you."

"You're welcome."

She closes the door behind her and he can hear her walk down the hall he hates hospitals he always has since he was a little kid and he broke his arm wrestling with his brothers in the backyard. He doesn't have to wait very long before the nurse returns with a cup of water,blanket and a couple of pillows she hands them to him and he thanks her before she leaves the room. He takes a drink and the water is refreshing he hadn't really realized how thirsty or tired he was for that matter. He sets up the pillows then he leans in close to Randy and whispers into his ear.

"I am going to rest now my love but I am right here if you can hear me. I am not going anywhere I promise no matter how long you are in here I will be right here by your side. I love you so much I hope you know that. I can't wait to marry you so you need to wake up I love you baby so much."

He leans in and gives him a gentle kiss on the lips before making his way over to the couch that is against the wall he lies down and pulls the blanket around himself before long he is passed out.

It's raining a light drizzle and the sky is dark very dark like the heavens have opened up and angels are crying. There are so many people and they all look the same they are all dressed in black he can't tell the faces apart because their heads are bowed. He looks around but he doesn't know anybody why is he here? He looks down and he is dressed in black he is sitting in the front row staring at a man at the front. The man is the only person wearing white why is he wearing white who is he. He feels confused and broken he can't figure out what is missing everything is fuzzy and unclear. Then the man in white clears his throat and begins to speak he can't hear what he is saying although he hears every word.

"We are all gathered here today to celebrate the life of a wonderful man who wouldn't want us to mourn but to cherish all that he gave us. He was a father and a lover he lived for his daughter Ali. He was at times cold but to those of us who really knew him he was one of the most genuine people ever."

He can't keep it in anymore he begins to sob and a hand grabs his trying to comfort him but this does no good he sobs even harder several of the faces are staring at him and this makes him angry. He cries out and they don't say anything they just drop their heads he is standing and making his way out of this place he hates it he hates everything.

John sits upright and runs his hands through his hair he is sweating and he can't catch is breath. It felt so real but he realizes it was a nightmare he was at his funral because he had been successful when he tried to kill himself but he can't shake that feeling and it rattles him to his core. He gets off the couch and pulls a chair up next to the bed he takes a seat and grabs his hand. He bends his head down and he begins to cry he can't control it and he honestly doesn't care he just lets it go.

"I am sorry Randy I can't say that enough I will help you with you depression anyway I can just please wake up please. I don't want you to die I need you I love you I am so sorry thank god you didn't die you don't know how many people need you and love you."

He knows that he won't be able to get any sleep so he just watches his chest rise and fall he finds peace in this knowing that he is still breathing. He isn't even sure what time it is or how long he has been awake when he sees the door to his room open and a night nurse enters.

"Oh hello I didn't know anybody was in here."

"Yeah the nurse before said one of us could stay."

"Your fine honey how are you holding up? Why are you still awake you look exhausted."

"Oh I just had a hard time getting to sleep so I thought I would sit up for a while."

"Well if you need anything let me know."

"Thanks."

He can feel his eye lids becoming heavy as he sits there but he tries to fight it because he doesn't want to have another nightmare but he loses the battle and he is soon asleep again. This time he doesn't have any dreams and he sleeps until Elaine gently shakes him awake in the morning.

"Honey you feel asleep in the chair."

"Oh sorry."

"Your okay visiting hours started so we thought we would come stay with him for a while so you could go home and get some rest."

"Okay thanks."

"We will call you if anything changes."

0-0-0

For three weeks they continued this routine in the morning his parents would stay with him so that John could go home shower,sleep and have some normal food then in the afternoon he would return to the hospital so that they could also go home and get some rest. They were all exhausted and broken but they had managed to bond over the time they had been given and his parents now couldn't wait for the two of them to get married. John had shown them that his love for their son was unbreakable and unwavering it was late in the evening and he was reading a book to Randy something he had started a few days after their routine had begun. Just because he felt like it helped him in some way. One hand of course was holding his and the other gripping the book. He had just finished the chapter when he felt pressure on his hand he looks over to see his eye lids moving. He holds his breath and squeezes his hand his eye lids flutter again and then they slowly opens. The light is bright and blinding he has to squint for a moment until his eyes adjust and he isn't really sure where he is at. John is crying as watches Randy open his eyes he smiles a little and leans in to give him a gentle kiss on the lips.

"John?"

"Hey baby."

"Where am I?"

"Do you remember what happened?"

"We had a terrible fight and you gave me your engagement right back."

"Oh Randy I am so sorry I love you so much please forgive me."

"I forgive you where am I?"

"You are in the hospital."

"Oh god what happened?"

"After I left you tried to kill yourself."

"Oh god it's coming back I couldn't breath there was nothing but despair."

"I know baby it's okay I know you have depression but we are going to get through this. I love you and I shouldn't have walked out on you I need my ring back but only if you will still marry me."

"Of course John I love you and I am so sorry I didn't tell you I was depressed. How long have we been here?"

"That is a hard thing to admit but at least we know now and we can move forward. You were in a coma it has been three weeks."

"Oh wow."

"Yeah I think I better go get a nurse."

"Okay."

John makes his way to a nurses station on the way he takes out his phone and calls his parents Elaine answers and he let's them know that he is awake she begins to sob on the phone before telling him that they are on their way. He reaches the nurses station and he tells a brunette behind the desk that Randy is awake. She looks very surprised as she tells him that she will let a doctor know then he turns around and makes his way back to the room. He closes the door behind him and makes his way back to his chair. He is sitting up and he smiles as John takes a seat.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like a fool honestly."

"Please don't baby you aren't the only person in the world to struggle with depression and I can understand why you felt like you did we are all to blame. Don't be upset with me I called your parents and let them know that you are awake."

"Why would you do that they hate me."

"I think you need to talk to them baby."

"I don't want to."

"Trust me baby just talk to them."

"Okay."

There is a knock on the door and a doctor enters the room he smiles as he sees Randy sitting there.

"Hey sleepyhead."

"Hi."

"How are you feeling."

"Refreshed."

"Three weeks of sleep will do that to you. We just need to make sure that everything is working okay then I will have a nurse come in and talk to you."

"Okay sounds good thank you."

With this the doctor quietly and quickly checks his vitals to make sure that everything looks okay then he thanks them before letting them know that a nurse will be in shortly to talk to them.