Amy didn't know what made her more nervous; the way Lou paced back and forth on the porch or the labored sounds of her breathing. She was beginning to look pale and Amy knew she wasn't far from passing out.

"Just breathe, Lou", Amy coached her sister, making few sounds of inhale and exhale just to demonstrate to Lou what she wanted her to do. Sometimes in a situation like this it was hard to focus on what the other person was saying, so maybe mimicking the same thing would help her understand better.

"I can't..." Lou's voice made it sound like she was suffocating as she felt like the world was closing in on her.

Her hands were tingling and she had to shake them and squeeze them together just to feel her fingertips. Suddenly it seemed like the world began to shake as her legs began to buckle and everything began to turn dark which forced her to sit on the bench just to make sure she would not collapse.

Amy sat beside her, gently massaging her back to help her relax.

"Yes, you can. There's air all around you, fresh country air. Just focus on those breaths coming in... and out..." Amy continued. She knew it was mostly in Lou's head and there was nothing wrong with her lungs, but it was her job to help convince her of that fact.

Eventually Lou's breathing got better as she began to inhale through her noise and exhaled through her mouth. She was sweating and it wasn't all because of the warm summer air. What she thought to be her safe haven was now beginning to feel like anything but. Lou could almost hear her own screams as she had tried to revive Katie echoing inside her head.

"I feel like ever since I saw Katie in the pond..." Lou began, her eyes opening now and moving toward the little hill that hid the water behind it, "I haven't been able to breathe properly. I thought it might get better to see her back home, back to normal, but it's just reminding me how there are dangers everywhere and she's not even safe here... I can't protect her from everything."

She knew about the statistics where home was listed as one of the most dangerous places on earth. Lou now realized why. What had been only statistics on a page had become way to real to her now.

Amy's eyes shifted toward the hill too, wondering how it must have been for her. She knew she couldn't understand it completely from her point of view because she was not a mother herself, but there had been enough tragedy in her life for her to grasp some idea of how Lou must have felt when she saw Katie, lying face down in the waters of the pond, and thought she had drowned.

"And now... with this Georgie thing on top of it all..." Lou said, sighing, as she shook her head. "I don't know what I'm doing, Amy. Who gave me the right to become a mother? I don't deserve it, that's for sure."

"What are you talking about?" Amy said, returning her eyes back to her sister. She didn't like how hard Lou was being on herself, especially because she knew how much Lou had worked on this single parent thing ever since Peter and her had decided to go their separate ways. "You're a great mother, Katie and Georgie are lucky to have you."

Lou laughed, her tone anything but amused. "I know you're just trying to help me, Amy, but if you were in my shoes, you'd feel the same way..."

"But I'm not in your shoes", Amy pointed out, "which is why maybe I'm able to see it more clearly. You're way too invested with everything, with every decision you have made, and right now you are forgetting all the good things you've achieved, how much you love those girls and how that love is something every child wishes to have."

"I don't know..." Lou was still feeling unsure. "I mean, maybe I need that hyper critical view to see everything I do wrong so I can see what I should be doing instead. But it's too bad I only see what I've done wrong when it's too late..."

"It's never too late. As long as you're alive, there's always hope", Amy said, hoping her sister would catch her optimism too. "Can I ask... what happened with Georgie...? Maybe I can help. I mean - I wanna help."

Lou sighed. She knew Amy would not judge her nor Georgie, but it was more about her own mood that made it hard for Lou to repeat. Another layer of guilt was gnawing at her.

"She hit Olivia. Again", Lou admitted shamefully. "And as if that wouldn't have been enough to handle, they expelled her from school... "

Amy was stunned, but then again not surprised. Not only did she know how Georgie didn't get along with Olivia, but it also put things more into perspective so they made sense with everything she had seen that morning; Grandpa's weird timing for bringing Georgie home from school and the unwelcoming attitude they had both had with her and new client.

"Oh... What's gonna happen now then?"

"Peter and I are looking into counselling for her", Lou admitted, picking at her cuticles nervously because she still wasn't completely sold to the idea even if what Peter had said inside the house had made sense. "He thinks- or we think it might be good for her..."

"Yeah, it could be", Amy said, feeling like maybe it was good to have some professional help if nothing else worked. "I mean, she's been through a lot. It can't be easy for anyone, especially a girl her age."

"Everyone seems to be thinking that but... I don't know, I have my doubts about this", Lou admitted now that Peter was not around. She was still on board for it of course, she had made that promise after all, but something deep inside was not fond of the idea and it had taken a little time to understand why. She had to make peace with herself before she could talk to Georgie about it. If Georgie could figure out she didn't believe counselling herself, then there was a good possibility she would not give it a chance either.

"Why?"

Lou took a long time before she continued.

"It's because of dad..."

Amy frowned. "Dad? What does he have to do with any of this?"

"I don't expect you to remember this because you were so little, but... when dad had his accident, he got hooked on pills and drank a lot, so Grandpa kicked him out", Lou began.

"I know, Lou. I'm aware of all that", Amy told her.

She might have not have known all that when she was younger, but when she had grown older, Amy had started to get little bits and pieces from here and there through Grandpa, Marion or Lou. And when Tim came back into their lives nine years ago, he had revealed more about his side of things as well.

Amy sensed that she would never know the full story about the events that had taken place after Jack had kicked Tim out, because even if she was an adult now, Amy knew that everyone was still trying to protect her from the hurt despite the fact that they were (almost) one big happy family again. Some things were better left in the past.

"I know, but... I guess you never really saw it like I did. When dad was all messed up and begged mom to take him back, she told him to get help. And he did, eventually. It took a while, but he got clean, as you know. But the way Grandpa talked about it made me have bad associations with rehab and counselling altogether. I don't think Grandpa realized it, but since he hated dad so much, he made it sound like everything he did and chose was wrong. He always made sure to mention that going into rehab was shameful and dad shouldn't have gotten to a place where he needed it in the first place if he had been smart enough from the get go", Lou spoke.

Amy listened carefully because even if they had talked about these things a bit, she had never heard this side of it.

"I know things have changed since then and Grandpa has softened a bit, but I was so easily influenced when I was a teenager. I didn't like the way he talked about dad, but some of that stuck with me anyway. It was then I made myself a promise not to ever seek help, because it would mean that I would be a failure in Grandpa's eyes, just like dad was.- And now, I'm supposed to send Georgie to counseling..." Lou continued, hanging her head. "It's hard to accept, because I don't want people to think that she's a failure. That we are a failure, as a family."

"You said it yourself; things have changed, attitudes have changed", Amy objected. "You know those kind of issues and admitting you had problems were a taboo in the past, but people know better now and seek help. It doesn't mean you should be ashamed of it or feel like a failure. People have different ways to cope. - And if you think about it, counselling is what I do.

Not everyone believes in what I do, but I have results to prove it works. The horses might not speak, but I read their body language and help them move past their problems. I'm not really the one doing all the work, changing them, I'm just listening and allowing them to figure their problems out themselves. And that's what's going to happen with Georgie too", she said trying to make Lou believe as much as she did that the counseling could work. "She just needs someone to listen and guide her little bit and it might be better if it's someone she doesn't have a personal relationship with."

Lou looked at Amy, realizing what she was saying made a lot of sense. She couldn't find the words to thank her, so she just reached out and pulled her closer and wrapped Amy in her arms giving her a hug.

Amy knew without hearing it in words that Lou was thankful.

Just like with horses, it was all about the body language now too.