Glimmer is a tulanted gurl
Glimmer was a… special girl. Really, there was no other way to describe her.
She was just… special.
"MUMMY! Deed U si mi SPARKLY Pink nail poolash?!"
Just… special.
"No, sweetie. I didn't see it."
Glimmer sighed heavily and sat down in front of her computer. "Eye woont it!"
Her mother didn't answer her, and Glimmer rolled her eyes. Man, her Mom was sometimes just so difficult to understand!
"OOOOH, a neW missagE!"
Glimmer happily read her profile again before actually reading her new message. She only rewrote her profile yesterday, and she didn't get the chance to see if there are any spelling mistakes or anything.
Glimmer Loves Glitters Profile Page
Name: Glimmer! Im da prettiest gurl eva! *heart*
Age: 17 :D
Home: Disstrikt One, wid all de jelriws und SPARKSS!
Current location: at mi hous :)
Interested in: shuping, gosseping, applying neil pulesh! FUN FUN FUN!
In a relationship: Imma single, beatufle gurl. I nead a man, ASAP!
Nope. Not a single mistake.
"Im SSSOOO aousom!"
She really was.
She then read the new message on her Wall. It was from Johanna Mason ("Juanny Misun?") and was received on May 29 at 19:08PM.
'You're an idiot. You really are. A f*cking retarded.'
Glimmer frowned at the message.
"Stoopid Juanny Misun," She said, annoyed with the stupid girl who couldn't even write properly. Really, what was that asterisk in the middle of the sentence?
And she calls her an idiot.
Humph.
Glimmer Loves Glitters wrote her a well-thought reply.
'Sht up! I'll bluck u!'
'Please, block me! I seriously don't give a sh*t!'
Again with the asterisk. Could that girl even write?
Glimmer Loves Glitters wrote the next comment.
'Okey, I wiil!
…
…
How du u bluck pepule?'
Cato The Sexy Buffalo then joined the conversation.
'*facepalm*'
Glimmer raised an eyebrow. What did that even mean?
Cashmere was the next one to join the awesome conversation on Glimmer Loves Glitters' Wall.
'Okay, Glimmer honey, you need to stop being so stupid. You're a Career. Careers are smart and intelligent.'
Beetee replied quickly.
'Well…'
'Shut it Beetee.' Cashmere sent.
Glimmer Loves Glitters wrote the next comment.
'How kan I bi smurtt?'
Gloss, Cashmere's brother, joined the conversation.
'First, stop with the grammar mistakes.'
Glimmer lifted her eyebrows in surprise.
'Wat grumer mistukes?'
Cashmere sent the next comment a few moments later.
'*scratches head* this is worse than I thought. She isn't even aware of her oh-so-many mistakes.'
Marvel AKA The-Guy-That-Killed-Rue then joined the conversation.
'I think you should just give up. You don't know how many times I tried to teach her how to talk in proper English.'
"Honey! I found your nail polish!"
Glimmer, who was getting bored with the conversation, jumped in her place happily. "Oh YAY! Am huppy! Horey, horey, horey!"
Her mom handed her the nail polish, then walked away. She was a scientist and learned things about light speed and space and whatever.
BORING!
Glimmer started applying the nail polish, happy at how sparkly and pink it was.
She looked at the conversation again, and saw that Blight sent the next comment.
'What? How can she even speak in grammatical errors?'
Marvel AKA The-Guy-That-Killed-Rue sent the next comment.
'You'd be surprised to know just how talented she is.'
Glimmer Loves Glitters, being the talented girl that she was, decided to write to her fellow Careers and Blight what she was doing and saying. Because she was awesome like that.
'*applying glittery nail polish* Let's poonch, Kap'n Crunch, den vi'll eet hes fase 4 lunch…'
'… yeah, she's talented all right.' Blight sent in response. Glimmer smiled. Aww, how sweet of him to say that!
Gloss then sent the next comment.
'*sigh* I guess you're right. Let's just skip the whole "Let's make her an intelligent and sophisticated Career" and just go straight into the "Let's turn her into such a ruthless killing machine that no one would care just how stupid she is."'
Glimmer Loves Glitters sent another comment explaining what she was doing.
'*still applying nail polish* …tik tuk, fund a rok, gonnna nok dis poser's soks uff. WHOAA! THEYR PORPLE! WOHAHAA!'
Cashmere replied to Gloss's comment quickly.
'I think that's a good plan.'
Cato The Sexy Buffalo sent the next comment.
'But who will teach her? We need someone that is so good, he'll make her at least half a worthy Career!'
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck then joined the conversation.
'Did someone say… Enobaria?'
Blight sent a quick reply.
'…no, actually. You just interrupted the conversation all by yourself.'
'Shut it or I'll bite you!' Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck wrote angrily.
Blight sent the next comment.
'Okay… ? I think I'm missing something here… Can someone enlighten me, please?'
Cashmere wrote a quick reply.
'That's Enobaria. She won the 62nd hunger games after ripping open another tribute's throat. With her teeth.'
Blight sent the next comment.
'Oh. Now I get it.'
The next comment was from Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck.
'So, Glimmer, I'm here to teach you everything I know about killing people.'
Glimmer Loves Glitters wrote a quick reply as she let her nails dry.
'Im bord!'
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck sent a reply to Glimmer Loves Glitters' comment.
'Suck it up. Anyways, if you don't have any weapon anywhere near you, you can always use your teeth. Or even when you have your weapon with you, teeth are great. People should use them more often. So, you just need to get close to your victim… and prepare your teeth… and sink them into this person's flesh! *smiling happily*'
'Yuk, dis is disgoostin!' Glimmer Loves Glitters wrote, disgoosted.
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck sent waited for two whole minutes before sending her next comment.
'Wh-What did you just say?'
Marvel AKA The-Guy-That-Killed-Rue decided to help her out.
'I think she meant that this is disgusting.'
Glimmer rolled her eyes. What a stupid boy!
'NOO, I MANT DISGOOSTIN! DU U EVEEN SPIK INGLLISH!'
Seriously, he was such an idiot sometimes. Glimmer didn't even know it was possible to be that stoopid.
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck sent the next comment immediately.
'YOU STUPID GIRL! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE MISSING, NO IDEA! YOU'RE A FREAKING IDIOT, STUPID, MENTALLY DEMAGED GURL, UR SO STOOPED!'
Glimmer nodded her head approvingly at Enobaria's message. Finally, she said something clever.
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck sent another comment a few long minutes after that.
'Oh. Dear. God. Now I'm talking like that, too? IT'S CATCHING! SAVE YOURSELF!'
Enobaria My-Teeth-Belong-In-Your-Neck, Blight, Marvel AKA The-Guy-That-Killed-Rue, Cato The Sexy Buffalo, Cashmere, Gloss, Beetee and Johanna Mason all left the conversation.
But Glimmer Loves Glitters didn't care. They didn't deserve to be on her awesome Wall, after all.
'…It's Tusdey, Tusdey, gutta doo a hop un Tusdey…'
Well, Master Noble, there you have it. A chapter from Glimmer's POV. And this chapter just made all of my IQ points fly right out of my head.
I hope you're happy.
SeriuoSAlly.
Okay, so in the last chapter I mentioned President Snow writing a fanfiction about him and Cato, right? Well, I couldn't believe how many of you wanted to read his fanfic! Really, Snow/Cato? Now this is new.
Well, I didn't write Snow's fanfic, but Mustaches did. Go find it, it's hilarious! Its name is, obviously, "The Rooster, The Buffalo, And The Three Baboons". Check it out!
An awesome quote(s) from my favorite comedian ever, Ori Hizkia:
Ori: "So I met this beautiful girl, with the greenest eyes ever. I asked her, 'What is the color of your eyes?' She told me, 'Green. You have pretty eyes too, what is their color?' … Seriously, who in here have brown eyes?"
*applauds from the people in the crowd that have brown eyes, which is practically everyone*
Ori: "…Don't you think we kinda got screwed with the distribution of colors? What's with that depressing brown? When someone asks you what is your eyes color you can't just say brown, right? You say 'brown', and add to it another element. I told her, "I have brown-writing desk."
God, I adore him. He's so awesome :D
Have a lovely day :)