Chapter 26

Friday after school, a car came and picked Mitsuru up to take her to her birthday celebration at her home. As Ryuichi walked her to the front of the school, students continued to greet her a happy birthday as they passed by. Mitsuru thanked every one of them without slowing her procession to the car.

"Don't forget to eat when you get a chance," Ryuichi advised her, grinning as he got the door. "If you can, get some small pieces of fruit. You're going to need that sugar."

"Is that spoken from experience?" she asked, smiling as she slid into the back seat.

"Just try to have fun, okay?" He winked. "And happy birthday again."

He shut the door and waved as the car pulled away. Without a doubt, she was already dreading the party.

Though he was just at his parents' house yesterday, it was his scheduled day to watch over his sister. With a little painkiller to help with his injuries, he comfortably took his motorcycle, now that the rain had stopped. Upon his arrival, he was greeted with cheery warmth by his sister and contempt by his mother, who looked to be attempting to telepathically destroy his motorcycle. As much as he knew his mother abhorred his mode of transportation, she remained friendly, likely so as not to shock the baby into a premature birth by stressing Shizue out.

"Take care of your sister, okay?" were the usual parting words Ayumi said to Ryuichi before leaving for work. He hugged their mother, rolling his eyes when she couldn't see.

"Will do, Mom," he told her. "Take care of yourself."

She hugged Shizue, too, both exchanging their own usual words of "Take care" and "Love you", sounding a little more automatic than heartfelt. When Ayumi left for the bus stop, Ryuichi and Shizue went inside.

"Exam time already?" Shizue asked when Ryuichi spread his books out on the kitchen table. "I don't envy you one bit."

Ryuichi's wound stung when he sat down. "Yeah, it's almost that time again," he grumbled.

She picked up one of his text books. "Wait, this is a college course, isn't it?"

"Yeah. It was Mitsuru's idea." He watched as his sister picked up the college level English book in her other hand, looking like a scale weighing the difficulty of each course. "She asked if I wanted to get ahead in my education since I was doing pretty well, so I thought, 'why not'?"

"Uh-huh." She set down the other book and flipped through the English one. "Did you do it to further your studies, or because she suggested it?"

"Well, if she hadn't suggested it, I wouldn't have known about furthering my studies with these classes."

"You know what I mean!"

He knew what she was getting at, but he wasn't about to indulge her. All he did was shrug and open his history book to begin studying, looking over his little note cards to make sure he wrote the correct information.

Shizue became fussy, wanting to get out of the house after being stuck indoors due to all the rain. Ryuichi eyed his books, but if Shizue was going to be distracting him with her complaints, then he might as well sacrifice a little time for an outing in the hopes that she'll return the favor and let him study.

The weather warmed up now, where Ryuichi was able to leave his blazer at the house while Shizue wore an oversized hoodie and sweat pants. The two went at a leisurely pace to the little snack store, feeling the sun plant toasty kisses on their faces, blessings after the rain.

Shizue had plenty to chat about, but Ryuichi's mind was far away on something else. He wondered if Mitsuru's birthday celebration had already started, and if she was able to sample a morsel or two from the refreshment table. He thought about the little cake he baked for her tucked away safely in his room, away from those who might steal a piece. His gut flipped when he thought about the CD.

Already, he could imagine Mitsuru giving him a smile out of pity and obligated appreciation when he hands her his presents. Compared to all the other gifts she must've received, his was just laughable. The more he thought about it, the more he wanted to just give her the cake and chuck the CD in the trash.

"Mom and Dad really gave you a hard time last week," Shizue said, calling him back from his thoughts. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything."

"It's all right," he said, smiling. He kept his voice light to not upset her. "I don't know how I would've dealt with it if my friends were the ones who said that stuff."

"Oh, believe me," she grunted, shaking her head. "If I had your muscles, I would've beaten their faces in."

She patted his arm, not knowing about the bruises there. While all she felt was a sculpted bicep, he felt an electrical sting that made him flinch.

"I-It's true!" He forced a laugh to cover the pain. "A mother's strength is unmatched!"

"Yeah, right!" She laughed with him, oblivious to how much her touch had actually hurt.

They returned home with snacks and sodas, bringing with them their light mood. Shizue and Ryuichi both threw jokes around, imitating their parents when they went berserk and saying the things they wished they had the audacity to snap back at them.

Crack.

The siblings froze, exchanging horrified expressions. Ryuichi listened for the noise again, trying to figure out what it was as his sister hid behind him. She gripped his arm, her fingers finding his bruises again.

"What was that?" she whispered loudly into his ear.

"I don't know," he replied softly over his shoulder.

"We should call the cops."

Ryuichi crossed the room to the kitchen and pulled his taser from his bag. "Go hide. I'll check it out."

Shizue's eyes bugged out when she saw the weapon. "Where the heck did you get that?"

"Just go!" he hissed.

"Fine. But be careful!"

Ryuichi crept his way out into the hallway, listening for the noise again. He heard the sharp crack of sniffles followed by a groan, and then a raggedy cough. The sounds led him to their parents' bedroom on the first floor. With one hand on the doorknob and the other holding up the taser, Ryuichi burst into the room, pointing his weapon with the intent to shoot when he saw his father sitting up in bed, yelling.

"What the hell are you doing?" he bellowed at his son.

Ryuichi quickly lowered his taser, horrified. "S-Sorry! We thought—"

Shizue rushed in after him. "Dad? What are you doing home?"

Their father coughed into his hand and sniffled. "Katabuchi caught a cold and passed it to me," he grunted as he reached for another tissue. "Your mother sent me home because I'm 'spreading germs'!"

Both Ryuichi and Shizue stifled their snickers from their dad's impression of Ayumi. After putting his taser away, Ryuichi made ginger tea with lemon and honey for their dad, and then cooked him some rice porridge. Toshio proceeded to rant about the cook who got sick, spitting bits of rice as he vented. He complained about how bad it would be if Katabuchi got everyone sick, and how irresponsible he was for sneezing and coughing into his hand, and then touching all the kitchenware.

"But Dad, didn't you say that Mom had to send you home because you were sick, too?" Ryuichi dared to ask him.

"I'm careful!" his father raged, but Ryuichi thinned his lip as he heard Shizue snort just outside the bedroom.

He ended up tending to both Toshio and Shizue that evening. His sister stayed far away from their dad, holing herself up in her bedroom to watch videos on her laptop where she wouldn't catch his cold. Every time Ryuichi sat down to try to study, he would have to get up to go help them in some way— making dinner for Shizue, running to the store for cough medicine, finding laptop chargers—there was barely enough time for him to even see what was on the page of his text book before he was off to do another task. When Ryuichi returned from his latest trip up the stairs, he had to pause for a second to take a painkiller when his injuries began to ache again.

He didn't bother to sit at the kitchen table anymore. Staring longingly at his books, he had once hoped that their dad being home meant that he could return to the dorm early. He shook his head at how wrong he had been.

"Thanks for the meal!" Shizue announced after dumping her dirty dish into the sink. She was already halfway up the stairs before Ryuichi could ask her to wash the dishes.

Ryuichi had just finished drying the last spoon when his father called him into his room. Anticipating that his father needed more tissues, he grabbed a fresh box and went to see his father.

"You can go home now," Toshio told him when he stood by the bed. "I'll take care of things here."

Ryuichi cocked an eyebrow at his father. "Um, are you sure about that?"

"It's fine." He waved his son off.

"But, what if she gets sick? It could affect the baby."

"She's usually in bed by now anyway." His father motioned for the new box of tissues. "Listen, Ryuichi, I don't know if your mom told you this, but there's been talk around the neighborhood about your sister. Everyone seems to think that she's—"

"Mom told me." Ryuichi regretted cutting him off. To his surprise, his father didn't seem to think much of it.

"She did? Oh, good."

Toshio rubbed a finger under his nose and sniffled. "Anyway, I noticed that you took her on a walk again today. I don't mind that, but it's just, with all the talk going on, your mother and I are worried that something might happen, like the baby might decide it wants to be born while you guys are stranded somewhere."

Ryuichi stared bleakly at his father. "So, you don't want me to take her out anymore?"

"Well, yeah. And, it's not just about the baby, but also for Shizue's safety, too."

His father sniffed up some wet gunk and swallowed it. "We don't know if someone might try to hurt your sister because of her mistake, so we just don't want to take any risks. Remember what happened at the mall?"

Ryuichi nodded stiffly. "Yeah, but she gets pretty stressed out if she's stuck at home all the time. The walks help her a lot."

"She just needs to endure it for a few more weeks. We just want to make sure that both your sister and the baby are safe," Toshio kept saying.

He reached for another tissue, finding an empty box. He opened up the new box and pulled out a handful of tissues, coughing into the open air before covering his mouth.

"There's another thing that your mom and I were talking about," he said amid a flurry of coughs. "We want your sister to go back to school to finish up her last few credits so she can graduate."

Ryuichi had to take a moment to register what he had just said. "Wait, you want her to go back?"

"Of course. She was almost done until all this happened, and since she was so close to finishing, we want her to get her degree."

He shook his head. "So, she's going back to finish up, and she's taking the baby with her?"

"No, no." Toshio breathed in too deeply and began another coughing fit. "The baby stays here with us."

Ryuichi squared his shoulders, bracing himself. "Hang on. I thought Mom said she was afraid that Shizue might dump her baby on you guys and run off. And now you guys are willing to let her leave to finish her degree, but you guys have to watch over Megumi?"

"Like I said, your mom and I talked about it, and we want her to finish her degree." Toshio started raising his voice, as if doing so would help his son understand him better.

"Yeah, but what about you guys? How are you going to run a restaurant and take care of a baby?"

"Well, we'd have you help out, too."

That did it. Ryuichi anchored his feet to the ground and his hands at his sides, fighting to keep himself from exploding at his father.

"Dad, I'm preparing to go to college, too," he said in a low growl. "I need time to study for my entrance exams, but you guys want me to watch over Megumi for Shizue while she gets to finish up her degree before I can even get my foot in the door? Is that what you're saying?"

His father snorted. "What do you need college for? You work for Mitsuru as her butler, don't you? Do you need to take classes to learn how to operate a vacuum?"

His father's laughter turned into a hacking cough. Ryuichi clenched his fists, almost shaking now.

"Besides," Toshio continued, "after you graduate from high school, you're supposed to come back to the restaurant."

Ryuichi felt as if his father had shoved his hand into his gut and pulled out his intestines through his belly button. He felt hollow. Cold.

"What if I decided that I don't want to work at the restaurant?" he asked his father. A lump formed in his throat, strangling his voice. "What if I wanted to stick to being Mitsuru's bodyguard? Or pursue music?"

His father flapped a hand at him again. "That's fine, but right now, we have to be supportive of your sister."

"But what about—"

Toshio was about to say something but sneezed. He tore a tissue when he pulled it from the box, cursing as he grabbed more. "Look, I don't like the idea of sending her back to where she might screw up again, but all that money we put into her college tuition would've gone to waste if she doesn't go.

"As far as we know, she's been clean since she moved back. I haven't seen her touch a drink, and we haven't smelled any cigarette smoke anywhere. As far as we know, she's been pretty careful about all that for the baby's sake."

Toshio stared hard at his son, as if it would help him understand the situation more. "We want to give your sister that chance to get her degree. We were hoping you could help cover the costs. It shouldn't be too much, since it's just one or two semesters. Wouldn't you want the same for yourself if you were in her position?"

Ryuichi clenched his jaw, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. "So, you want to give her a second chance at finishing her degree, but I have to delay my college entrance exams so I can stay home and watch over her baby?"

"No, no, you're not listening."

Fury stabbed him in the chest with a fiery spear, but his father wasn't done talking.

"You can still go to college, but we want her to be able to get her degree, too. We don't know if they'll offer the classes she needs in the same semester, so just for a little while, we need your help while she's away. You can still take your college entrance exams and start school the following year."

"What if I don't pass the exams?" Ryuichi raged at him. "If I'm busy caring for the baby, when am I gonna have the time to study?"

"You're smart, aren't you? What's the problem?"

His entire body became so taut with fury that he was sure his own muscles would crush his bones.

"I'm hiring a nanny," he snarled, choking on the solid lump in his throat.

Toshio squished his face in disgust. "We can't afford one."

"I can."

"What for? Do you hate us so much that you wanna hire a nanny just so you don't have to see us?"

"I don't hate you!"

"Don't yell!"

"I have to so you'll listen!" Ryuichi roared at his father. His blood pounded hotly in his head.

Toshio glared at him. "You're as bad as your sister when she was in high school!" he lashed out. "I didn't raise my kids to show such insolence!"

"Maybe because all you had was the one daughter and the damned restaurant!"

"That restaurant is the reason why we had food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a roof over our heads!"

His father rubbed a tissue against his upper lip. "Are you so self-centered that you think you're not part of this family?" he stabbed at Ryuichi. "You feel left out, is that it? You wanted to live in that dorm, and now you're pissed that you don't feel like you're part of the family? Well, guess what—You are part of this family!"

"Am I?" Ryuichi blasted back. "It's always been about Shizue! Even now, you want me to take care of her kid so she can continue her life! What about my life? I have to put it on hold for her!"

"We're not asking you to give up your life! We're asking you to help out our family!"

"At the cost of my life!"

"It doesn't cost you your life!" Toshio threw down his shredded tissue, missing the trash can. "Ryuichi, it's because we're a family that we need to come together and help each other, okay?"

Ryuichi was ready to give up, seeing that his father would never understand. "I can hire a nanny to help us," he said quietly. The tension in his body slackened by a fraction.

"We suggested that to your sister, but she wants you to take care of Megumi because she trusts you." His father spoke just as softly, but his voice was still strained with tension. "She doesn't want a stranger to raise her baby."

"I get that, but if I'm taking care of Megumi, I won't have time to study."

"You have time. You just have bad study habits."

Ryuichi couldn't believe his father. It looked to him like his dad was telling him that he was destined to fail at school and to just give up on pursuing his education. All the times he scored number two in his school rankings, all the hours he put into studying late into the night, and all the extra tutoring he received from Mitsuru meant nothing to his father.

Ryuichi threw open his parents' bedroom door. It banged against the wall, Toshio shouting after him as he shoved his books into his bag. His father followed him, shouting in Ryuichi's face, spit drenching him as he snapped his school bag shut. He ignored him, wincing when his father grabbed hold of his bruised arm.

"I'm not done talking to you!"

"You said I can go!" Ryuichi shouted back. "I need to go so I can study!"

"Fine! Don't forget to come on Sunday!"

"I have exams coming up! I can't—"

"We had an agreement! We need you to be here!"

His father kept yelling. Ryuichi broke out of his father's grasp, grunting with pain. He stormed out the door, slamming it behind him, ignoring his father's shouts. He got on his motorcycle and left without looking back.

Ryuichi's rage sizzled against the cool night air. The engine's roar drowned out the echoes of his father's voice that chased him from the house. He gripped the handlebars tighter, his jaw clenched. The cold wind's sting froze his hands, but he didn't dare slow down to warm them up.

Back at the dorm, he slammed the back door without a care. Each quick step he took towards his room trampled the carpet. He thrust his bedroom door open, tossed his bag on the floor and his helmet on top of it. Without a second thought, he slammed his door shut and went out the front.

He couldn't feel the cold rub itself against his body, nor the twinges of aches from his injuries, nor the fatigue from the day of running around according to his family's will. From what he could tell, he wasn't part of the family the way his father claimed him to be. He was their extraneous butler who was family only in name, except he was the one paying for his sister's tuition and her baby's expenses. The irony was that he wasn't allowed to use his own money for the nanny, which he knew they all desperately needed.

He bumped shoulders with someone. "Sorry," he murmured, stopping in his tracks.

The other party uttered a low moan. When he turned to look, he gasped when he saw a woman with a dead, blank stare, filthy clothes, matted hair, and her mouth gaping open with drool dribbling down her chin. He clamped his own mouth shut and walked away.

He wound up at Naganaki Shrine, still lost in his own ire. It was when he stood at the bottom of the stairs that he took notice of where he was, unsure of why he brought himself there. He climbed the stairs, fighting back a shiver as he looked at the worn, stone steps. He started towards the shrine, glancing to the empty playground. Halfway to the shrine, he stopped to peer down at the stone pathway. Using the jungle gym as a guide, he took a few steps back and traced his toe on a spot and sighed.

"What am I even doing?" he asked himself in disbelief.

Sighing once more, Ryuichi looked again to the lonely green jungle gym in the sandbox. He remembered many years ago when he once thought he could never climb something that big, and that it was Shizue who practically dragged him up to the top to prove him wrong.

He thought about his sister and everything he and his father said earlier that evening. Maybe he was being selfish, he realized, wondering how he would've felt if he was in Shizue's position: No job, no money, no degree, and on top of that, a bad reputation. Everything was working against his sister, and even—

Ryuichi hung his head. "Even me," he said slowly, guilt sinking in.

He dragged his feet as he left the shrine, feeling his insides begin to collapse from the guilt. He kept his hands deep in his pockets and his head down, unworthy of looking up at the sky. His feet knew where to go, even while mired in his regret and sorrow. As he reached the sidewalk down below, a car passed by. He watched as it did a U-turn, the headlights sweeping over him, blinding him for just a second, and then the car came to a stop right in front of him. The rear window lowered, and Mitsuru peered out at him with a smile.

"You're back early," she called to him.

As torn apart as he felt, Ryuichi smiled through his anguish and leaned into the window. "Five thousand for fifteen minutes of whatever you want," he joked, surprised at how easily he pulled it off.

She opened the door for him. "Get in."

"Money first."

"You already received your paycheck."

He shrugged. "Fair enough," he said, and slid in next to her. As soon as he closed the door, the car turned around again and headed towards the dorm.

In the dim flashes of streetlights, he saw that Mitsuru wore her school uniform, but her make-up had been retouched. Her eyelashes were elongated, and her lips a deeper shade of red.

"So, how was the party?" he asked, hoping to distract himself from his thoughts. "Did you get to eat this time?"

"A little, but only thanks to Kikuno."

He rolled his eyes. "Can't even eat at your own birthday party?" he grumbled. "I'll make you something when we get back."

She thanked him but declined, saying that she was eventually able to eat after all the guests had left.

"How about you?" she asked. "I thought you would still be at your parents' place."

"Mom sent Dad home early because he caught a cold and didn't want him scaring away the customers with germs, so I got to go home earlier than usual since he was there to keep an eye on Shizue," he explained, leaving out the worst parts of the tale.

Somehow, he resisted the strong urge to just tell her everything that happened, not wanting to ruin her birthday. He was able to maintain his smile and kept his voice light and cheery. Then again, just having Mitsuru there helped lift his mood.

"Anyway, enough about my day. Anything interesting happen at the party?"

He listened intently as she told him about her evening. According to her, there seemed to be even more guests in attendance that year, meaning there were more people she had to go around to and socialize with for a few minutes at a time. Everywhere, guests came up to her and greeted her a happy birthday, sweeping her up in their stories, jokes, tales of admiration, and the occasional pitch for their sons as potential marriage candidates. She proudly told Ryuichi about how Kikuno called her away from the party for a few minutes, saying that her father was on the phone, wanting to greet her on her birthday. The guests allowed her to go, not knowing that she was headed to the kitchen to sit and have a little snack before going back to work.

"What's so funny?" Mitsuru asked when he chuckled.

"Just picturing you about an arm's length away from the refreshment table while crusty old men make you listen to them talk about the good old days," he mused.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "You're not wrong," she finally said, just as the car parked in front of the dorm.

After letting Mitsuru inside, he asked her to wait for a moment while he vaulted over the front desk to get to his room. He brought out the little cake box and held the CD behind his back. The look of delight on Mitsuru's face chased away all his anger towards his family, where all he could feel was a tremendous welling of joy and a hint of anxiety as she unwrapped the strawberry shortcake. It had a crown of fat strawberries on top surrounding a small card that greeted her "Happy Birthday!" in gold letters.

"It smells divine. This is your finest work yet," she marveled, turning the little cake around so she could admire it from all angles.

He blushed. "There's one more thing," he said, and produced the CD wrapped in silver paper and tied with a red ribbon. "The thing is, I wasn't sure what to get for you, so..."

She took the flat present, turning it over in her hands before untying the ribbon. She delicately peeled back the strips of tape, taking care to not tear the wrapping paper. Each fold she opened felt like Ryuichi's layers were being stripped away to expose what a loser he was underneath for giving her something so shoddily made. When at last she held the CD in her hands, he braced himself for her disappointment.

"So, I recorded myself playing a bunch of songs," he said in a mousy voice. "They're not perfect, and you can hear a bunch of my mistakes, but—"

"C'est magnifique." She opened the case to see the list of songs printed inside. "Ryuichi, this is so thoughtful. Thank you."

He nervously rubbed the back of his head. "It's really nothing."

She closed the case, beaming as she admired it some more. "Anyone can purchase a present if they have the means, but to craft a present takes time, consideration, and a lot of hard work."

"Yeah?" His bashful smile returned. "I-I just thought it was the only thing I could do."

"It certainly is uniquely you," Mitsuru agreed. "That's what makes it special."

Ryuichi ground his fingers into his scalp. "I guess? Well, like I said, you can still hear mistakes, so it's not perfect, but I guess it's kind of like a marker for how I sound now. When my hand's all better, I'll be able to record another one—a better one."

He looked to Mitsuru with determination in his eyes. "I promise that I'll work harder so I can record a better version for you," he said dutifully.

The tiniest flicker of guilt smoldered in her eyes. He traced her sight to his right hand, then to his arm.

Mitsuru peered up at him with a fading smile. "As much as I appreciate that, I would hope that any promises for your self-improvement would have yourself in mind and not someone else," she said to him. "If you're going to be a better you for someone, be a better you for you."

He got stuck on her words. His right hand twitched the more he thought about what she had said. She had to be wrong, but as to why, he couldn't find it in him to argue against her.

He held on to his promise to Mitsuru. He had to improve for her, he told himself. It wasn't for his sake, but for hers.

She neatly folded the wrapping paper back up and gestured to the cake. "So, am I going to have to eat this all by myself, or do I get a little help?" she asked, her smile returning.

Ryuichi was all too happy to prepare tea to accompany the cake. He added a little candle on top and lit it, but when he began to sing "Happy Birthday" to her, she asked him to stop.

"If you don't mind, I've had my fill of that song for one day," she told him.

He nodded. "All right. At least make a wish before you blow it out."

She gave it some thought. When she had her wish, she drew in a deep breath.

He leaned in with a smirk. "You sure you wanna wish for that?"

She choked. Ryuichi laughed as she coughed up a tiny squall. Mitsuru lightly patted her chest and waved a hand to clear the air, but the candle remained lit.

"Honestly," she muttered to herself. With her thumb and finger, she extinguished the tiny flame.