A/N: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: So in Chapter 25, there was a very important moment/section that I forgot to write in, so I updated it by reposting the chapter—it WASN'T a glitch. If you haven't already, go read that part of the chapter before reading this one—it's important to fully understanding the next few chapters. Everything I added is underlined so you don't have to read the whole thing again. If you read it after Sunday night my time (sorry that's like as specific as I can get) you're good. Your author apologizes and thanks you profusely :)

ALSO:

Please save your pitchforks for after I've metaphorically fled the scene. Thanks!

General Thaddeus Ross was, in summation of the accounts of various Avengers, a bastard-asshole-sonuvabitch-demon-spawn.

Bucky was on edge leading up to the visit, never letting me out of his sight, pacing back and forth like a caged animal. The others were obviously on edge as well. This guy was bad news.

"He's basically Satan," Tony said, and his facial expression indicated that he was not joking. "He's tried to kill Bruce numerous times—old story—and he's tried to lock Bucky in a government testing facility on more than one occasion."

I grimaced, immediately on edge. Anybody who messed with Bucky—any of the Avengers, really, but most of all Bucky—earned themselves a one-way ticket to the top of my shit list.

Granted, I had a small shit list, but that just meant the people on it were really bad.

I adjusted Stella in my arms. Her stiff posture reflected the tension seeping into the air, putting me even more on guard. "What do I need to know?"

"That he's going to try to manipulate you into seeing things from his perspective," Steve said calmly, using his leader voice. "You're strong, Peter. You can't let him."

"Okay," I said, sounding more determined than I felt. "I…he's just g-gonna talk to me, though, right? It's not, like, an interrogation…?"

"No, Peter, nothing like that," Tony promised. "He's Secretary of Defense, and this is…I mean, it's a pretty big thing. Having such a powerful formula in the head of a kid is already a crappy situation, but the fact that they used something similar on you is…well, even worse. He's going to want to meet you, talk to you, pick your brain for stuff. He has to be in on every delicate situation there is, which is probably why everything always gets so screwed up."

"I have never felt positive feelings for this Ross," Thor proclaimed, looking grim as he stood to the side, arms folded, looking like a pissed-off bodybuilder.

And geez. If Thor didn't like him, the guy must have been positively evil.

"That's because he's a self-righteous, arrogant asshole who thinks everybody is under his thumb," Rhodey muttered.

"You'll be fine, Малыш," (A/N: kiddo) Tasha said with a small smile. "You've got a strong mind and a strong heart. We'll be waiting for you when you're through."

"And if he does anything we don't like, I've got some exploding arrows on hand," Clint commented, looking deadly serious.

I gave a nervous chuckle, mostly to relieve the tension building in my chest.

"Boss?" FRIDAY said, sounding as apprehensive as she could without emotions. "General Ross and his escort are here."

Bucky swore and looked around the room. "I don't like this, guys. I don't like him going into a room alone with this prick."

Oh. That was another thing. Tony had been instructed to grant access to a windowless, sound-proof, FRIDAY-proof room, to make sure that none of the Avengers influenced my answers or questions in any way while I was talking to Ross.

I was…not happy.

But life sucked and there was no getting around it.

"Can somebody just have hot chocolate and a Disney movie waiting for when I'm done?" I mumbled, my heart beating faster as Tony and Steve went to escort the men to the room, where I'd meet them in a minute. I clutched Stella tighter, wishing I could take her with me.

"Of course," Bucky said with a strained smile, settling a hand atop my head. "Whatever you want, kid. We can order some dinner, if you want, too. Chinese?"

I smiled up at him, and however shaky it was, it was genuine. Our talk last night had been…enlightening. I hadn't said those words to anyone since May and Ben died. But…to Bucky…it was okay. Because over months and months of struggling with insecurity and apprehension, I'd finally decided to get over myself and just…tell them, especially Bucky. Tell them what they meant to me.

And I didn't regret it at all.

He gave my hair a good mussing and tugged me gently up. I handed Stella off to Clint, who gave me a nod. "I'll make sure she's distracted or something."

"Thanks."

As Bucky walked me down the hall to the room where Tony, Steve, Ross, and his guards were waiting, I felt a pit of apprehension and fear writhe in my stomach, prompting a brief swoop of nausea. I managed to hide it, but…something about this wasn't sitting right with me. Something bad was going to happen. I could feel it in every bone in my body.

"Bucky," I said, and no, it did not come out sounding like a whimper, because I'm fifteen and not a kid dammit, "you're gonna…be here, right? When I'm done?"

Bucky stopped, taking my shoulders. "Yes. I'm going to be right outside this door the entire time, Peter. This is the only door, you hear me? I'm not leaving it. If you have a panic attack, if you need help, anything, I'm going to be literally twenty feet from you, okay?"

I sighed shakily and smiled. "Okay. Thank you."

He returned the smile, trying to look calmer than he was, and opened the door for me. The hallway was twenty feet long, gray and dim with soundproof walls, reserved especially for very sensitive conversations. The heavy door at the end was as ominous as the come, all pale gray and cold and unforgiving. It wasn't terrifying at all, no.

Tony and Steve looked up from where they were waiting, grim-faced. "He's demanded that his guards stay with him. Something about concern for his personal safety or some other bull-sh—crap," Steve corrected quickly, light pink dusting his cheeks.

Despite the impending doom clawing at my insides, I managed a small laugh. "Watch yourself, Cap."

Tony, wearing a tense smile, ruffled my hair. "Go get him, Pete. Piss him off for me."

He and Steve, who patted my shoulder encouragingly, exited behind us. Bucky pulled me in, squeezing me a little tighter than necessary, reluctantly letting go. "Just a few minutes, Peter. Nothing big and elaborate. You're a strong kid. You've got this. Just…remember that we're waiting for you."

I grinned at him, and it was genuine. "I know. I'll be done before you know it."

…

I didn't like Ross.

I hated his mustache.

"Pleasure to meet you, Peter," he said with a benevolent smile. "I'm Secretary of Defense, General Ross. I've heard a lot about you."

"I bet." I responded shortly.

He gave a small laugh. "I can see this won't be easy."

"I've been told before that I'm a problem child," I said with a smirk, trying to sound more confident than I was with the two hulking, stoic guards at my back. I leaned back in my seat and crossed my arms. "You have questions for me? Ask them."

And he did. They were all questions I'd answered before. The monotony of the situation replaced my fear with…well, boredom. And confusion. He was being…nice. He was nothing like the Avengers had described him. I could only assume he was putting on an affable persona to win me over, but I wasn't stupid.

He asked me about my family and even respected my wishes when I said I didn't want to talk about it.

He was really laying it on thick, wasn't he?

"Okay, the million-dollar question," he said with a smile, looking apprehensive. "Do you…enjoy living here? With the Avengers?"

I blinked. This was a new question. "Of course. It's amazing. They're the best family I could ever ask for."

Ross paused, looking up from his papers at my steady tone. "And you're sure of this? They treat you like family?"

"All the time," I said, confusion breaking through my easy façade. "You sound like you don't believe me, but…it's true. They're all…my family, like overprotective brothers and sister, just one cause Tasha, or uncles or dads…I mean, they're all just…family. I can't really explain it. I just know. There's this connection."

"Connection," he repeated dubiously, something like pity entering his eyes. "Dammit."

Something was off about his reaction. He didn't seem surprised. He seemed… disappointed, and…sorry for me, almost. Like there was something I didn't know. "Why do you say that?" I asked, unsure if I really wanted an answer.

"Peter," Ross says, looking weary. He takes off his glasses and pinches the bridge of his nose, looking torn. "I…I didn't want you to find out this way, but…I have a son not much older than you, and a daughter I love very much. If something like this was happening to one of them, I'd want someone to tell them."

My heart was hammering in my chest. I didn't like where this was going. "Something like what?" I asked, my voice smaller than I'd intended.

He sighed audibly and closed his eyes, looking regretful. "They're using you, Peter. The Avengers. They only want the formula and your DNA to recreate the enhanced version in your bloodstream." He paused. "They don't care about what happens to you, in the end."

"You're lying." My reply was instantaneous. There was no reason to even entertain an idea as stupid as that. The thought was…unthinkable. There was absolutely no way it could be true. There just…it wasn't…it wasn't possible. "There's no way. I talked to them about it."

Ross spread his hands pleadingly. "I know it's hard to believe, Peter, trust me. I'm sorry. I didn't want to be the one to tell you."

"You're lying," I hissed, standing up and stalking to the door. I intended to bust out and find the Avengers and make them kick this guy to Kingdom Come, but the guards dropped heavy hands on each of my shoulders, blocking my exit.

They had to let me leave. I needed Bucky.

"Peter," Ross said, and dammit, he sounded so sad.

I whirled around, furious. I saw red. "They warned me about you. They told me you were a liar, and that you were going to try to manipulate me against them. It won't work. They're my family! The things they've done for me, the emotions, the…everything, you can't fake that!" I heaved another breath, rage consuming me. "They told me everything…about their pasts, and fears, and…they wouldn't…share so much, if they were just going to drop me. They would…never hurt me like that."

Ross sighed. "I'm so sorry. You're too young to have to deal with this. They were told to do whatever was necessary to gain your cooperation, even if it was sharing personal information…they're just doing their job. I just…Peter, do you know the things Natasha Romanov has done?"

"I do. She told me. They don't matter."

"They do. She has slaughtered people before. An uncountable number of people have died by her hand. The same hands that ruffle your hair, that hold you, are drenched in blood."

"It doesn't matter. She loves me, they love me."

"She was trained from six years old, Peter. You think love wasn't the first emotion they taught her to recreate flawlessly? She first killed when she was nine years old. The little girl she killed was seven. I've read the account. She didn't even care. She was completely emotionless. If she can kill someone so cold-heartedly, someone younger than you, you think she would have any qualms about using you and throwing you back onto the street like yesterday's trash?"

I was shaking. I couldn't tell if it was from rage, or from terror. "You're wrong. She was starving—"

"Clint Barton. He's a spy, too. He already has two families, his own and the Avengers. Why would he need to add you? Why would he want to? He was the first one to call you the team's 'little brother', you know. Do you know what happened to his brother? Clint shot him. Multiple times, with his own arrows. He almost killed one brother. He made it sound tame, like he was defending his ringmaster, but once Clint started, he didn't stop. He mutilated the man. How easy would it be to abandon another?"

"I—you're not—"

"Tony Stark. He has all the money in the world. You know he used to be called the Merchant of Death, Peter? The things he built, the weapons of mass destruction he created? They slaughtered families. Children. You are just another child to him. He doesn't care about you. He has absolutely no reason to. He could buy ten children just like you. You're nothing special."

"I won't—"

"Steve Rogers. He cares for you. You know why? Obligation. He is obligated, as Captain America, to care for every American. You are not special to him. Anything he has done for you, he would do for any other child. There is nothing about you that makes you special to him."

The words wouldn't come anymore.

"Sam Wilson. Same as Steve Rogers. He protects America. He's a soldier. He's protecting you as another American child. He doesn't care what happens to Peter Parker. Why would he? He's got his siblings to protect, you know. He hasn't been able to visit them in months because of you. You think he'd thank you for that?"

The room was spinning.

"Thor Odinson. He's a god, Peter. You're not even from his world. Why in hell would he care about you? You're just another child. A teenager with issues he's not equipped to handle. What reason would he have to care about you? Why would he take his precious time to deal with your issues if he has a world to rule? He just wants to help SHIELD get the formula from you. They're giving him something in exchange, I heard. A new power device of some sort from their research on Loki's scepter."

My knees were trembling. I felt like I was falling.

"Colonel Rhodes, 'Rhodey.' Another soldier. Obligated to care. He has his own family. Why would he need you? We would he want you? He already has Stark to keep track of. He doesn't need or want another distraction."

I tugged at the chair weakly and fell into it before I could collapse.

"Bruce Banner. One of the greatest scientific minds in the world. You're smart, Peter, but you're just a teenager. A child. Why would he possibly think you could help him with his experiments? He's humoring you and keeping you comfortable with the lab until the day he wants to use you for more testing. Getting you to trust him, so when the tests become invasive and painful, he'll tell you he's sorry and continue on, and you'll let him."

My vision blurred.

"And Bucky Barnes. Seems you've grown closest to him. Did you know that HYDRA brainwashed him, and tortured him? Made him kill men, women, and children? Made him try to assassinate Steve Rogers, his best friend? Bucky hates HYDRA with his entire being. Why would he love you, when your parents worked there? Why would he care about you, when you're just another one of their experiments? What better way to get back at them than to keep their greatest weapon from them? He's using you for nothing more than his own revenge, Peter. He doesn't care that it's you. Any love he's shown you is a clever façade to keep you from HYDRA out of spite."

I couldn't breathe.

It would have been easy to call him a liar, to scream and yell at him and not believe him, if he looked angry. If he looked threatening. If he was…aggressive.

He looked sad. He looked near tears.

He'd taken every one of my deepest fears and insecurities and laid them out in front of me. They were all on full display, now. I couldn't even pretend they didn't exist anymore. I knew it, he knew it, the guards knew it.

I clutched the chair so hard I thought it or my fingers or both would break. My words were quiet, so, so quiet. "Wh-why are you d-doing this to me? Why…w-would you say all th-that?"

"I didn't do it to hurt you, Peter," he said, sounding frustrated. I looked away from him. I stared at my knees. "I can't sit by another minute and watch them treat you like family when you're nothing to them. I can't let you get to the end, when you give them everything and they throw you away, because they will."

"No," I choked out, tears streaming down my face. The agony was a palpable thing invading the most secret parts of my heart. It couldn't be true. I couldn't believe it. If I did, then…everything I'd built, everything I'd let myself come to love, every vulnerable part of myself I'd hesitantly exposed to them, would come crashing down around me, and I honestly believed that I would never recover from something like that, so I couldn't let myself believe it. "I won't believe you. I—you—those are j-just assumptions…y-you don't have any p-proof."

Ross rubbed his suspiciously wet eyes. I didn't know what to believe. He seemed so genuine. Why would the Avengers call this man a liar, call him manipulative and cold hearted, when he was sitting right in front of me, crying over what he thought they were doing to me? Was it all part of his act? Was he trying to convince me with false concern?

Or—the unthinkable thought somehow wormed its way into my vulnerable mind—was he right? If the Avengers really didn't care about me, if they were just using me, of course, of course they'd tell me not to trust Ross.

But…it didn't prove anything. It didn't mean anything. Ross had no proof. He had no—

"There's a tape, Peter," he said quietly, bringing out a small, sleek object and pushing a few buttons. It was a voice recording. His finger hovered over the play button. "Would you like to hear it?"

"No," I said immediately, my voice shaking violently. "No, I would not like to hear it."

He played it anyways.

"Nice work, Avengers," Fury's voice came on, a bit more distorted than the rest. He must be speaking through a video call. "Mission was a total success. Peter Parker is, for the moment, safe from HYDRA."

The sounds of shuffling filled the audio with broken static, then Tasha's voice came on. "Fury, how long are we going to be saddled with this kid?"

What?

"Yeah," Clint agreed, exasperation clear in his voice. "Dammit, Fury, I'm wasting time on this kid when I could be with my own. I don't want to miss them growing up, but this is a full-time mission. I need some downtime with just Laura and the kids, man."

"I'm working on it," Fury said. "He's a stubborn little shit, that's for sure, but you guys are playing the part well. He'll crack eventually, and then I'll take care of it."

"Indeed!" Thor shouted, and the familiarity made my heart ache. "I wish for the new power source you have promised me, son of Fury! My Asgardian people will be well taken care of with such advanced—what is the word—technology?"

"A+ for Thor," Tony said sarcastically. "Seriously, though, the charade's getting old. That kid is a freaking attention whore. He's always just…there, hovering, whenever I want some peace and quiet, and I just have to slap on a smile and let him tinker. He's smart, but he's so damn annoying."

Suddenly, the grout between the tiles on the floor was the most interesting thing in the room. It wasn't for long, though, because I couldn't see anything past the tears blurring my vision.

"Tony, be nice," Steve said, and however small, I allowed a small tendril of hope to emerge. "The kid's been through a lot. I saw kids in Germany with that look he's got. Yes, I agree that he's a little needy, but try to be patient. This is our job, remember? It's not always glamorous."

The hope was crushed, mercilessly.

"A little?" Sam scoffed. "The damn kid never leaves. Seriously, I thought teenagers were supposed to be all moody and reserved from society. He follows us around like a puppy. And that damn cat. God, he treats it like a baby. It would be easier if he just shut himself in his room and never came out."

"Then we wouldn't have any opportunities to get the formula, genius," Tasha—Natasha—said affectionately.

Almost the same voice she used with me.

I was falling. I was falling down an endless slope, no one to catch me, nothing to break my fall, no end in sight. No release from this fear, this agony. I was free-falling in my own despair, and I seriously doubted anything, or anyone, could catch me.

"Yeah. I get how important this is, but…I need some time with my family, man," Clint said again, sounding almost desperate. "I haven't seen them for more than a few days in months. He made me miss Lila's birthday, Fury. I've never missed one of my kids' birthdays. She was heartbroken."

"You can take some downtime, Clint; I know with three kids already an emotionally needy teenager isn't your dream job," Rhodey joked. "We can take care of it."

"I don't know," Bruce said jokingly. "Even one less person to shoulder the responsibility of this kid may bring the Hulk out. He's a little fed up, too. It's one thing we actually agree on—this kid needs to go soon. I'm not getting any work done."

They laughed.

They laughed.

I wasn't breathing, anymore. My lungs burned. I couldn't care.

Bucky. Bucky would set them straight. Bucky would defend me. He cared. He cared, he had to. Bucky would help me, Bucky would—

"So, we got a time frame, Fury? I don't know how much longer I can effectively play 'parent/big brother/guardian'. Also, can we just reiterate the fact that I am the least qualified person for this role?" Bucky said jokingly, drawing more chuckles from the others.

"C'mon, Barnes, you're perfect," Clint said sarcastically, and I could hear the teasing smile. "You're all soft and fluffy." A pause. "I am surprised, though. You play the part pretty well."

"Yeah, well," Bucky scoffed. "Anything to screw HYDRA over. It'll be a different story if he has another nightmare, or gets caught by another HYDRA agent, or needs another damn diaper change. Seriously, my patience is twenty feet under and counting. He's just another HYDRA lab rat. I care as much about him as I do any other HYDRA bastard. Fury, I can't believe you made me get temporary guardianship for this kid."

"Don't worry," Fury said, sounding amused. "You can retract it after you have the research, and after you figure out the science behind his mutations. Which, by the way, is coming along nicely. The formula will probably help us complete our research, and then you can officially revoke any responsibility for him. Guardianship will be immediately transferred to SHIELD."

"Oh, thank God," Bucky said, huffing out a laugh. "As soon as we've got the info I'm revoking that shit so fast he'll get whiplash."

"Language," Steve breathed, though it came with an amused chuckle.

From the others, I just heard laughter.

Laughter.

Pain tore at every part of me. Not physical. Physical would have been better. This was like…this was…

This was the worst pain I'd ever experienced.

I'd been abandoned. My entire life, I'd been abandoned. My mother and father had left me, after they experimented on me. They'd left me. They'd had, however questionable, a reason.

My aunt and uncle had left me. It wasn't their fault. They'd been murdered protecting me. They'd had no choice.

The Avengers.

They had no reason. They had a choice.

Doubt was a funny little thing. It was a parasite, a leech that attached itself to everything solid and unbreakable and ate away at the foundation until it crumbled. Doubt was a termite eating away at the infrastructure of every solid, true thing, collapsing it from within. I could feel it, feel it, violating every happy memory with them. And once the infection had settled, it only spread.

The clap on the back Tony gave me when I built something impressive now had sinister undertones I'd never even thought to imagine. Natasha's small, warm smile was laced with ill intent. Bucky's grins and laughs and the way he looked at me like he was proud and happy, all those thoughts and feelings were tainted and stained with malice.

For some reason, I thought of Les Misérables. I thought of Marius' song, towards the end.

There's a grief that can't be spoken. There's a pain…goes on and on. Empty chairs at empty tables…now my friends are…

Dead and gone.

Alive. Alive. But so, so gone.

Something broke, then, inside me. Nothing physical. Nothing tangible. That would have been easier. Something irreparable fractured within my being. I wasn't having a panic attack. That may have been easier, if the world was blurring around me. No. No, everything was sharp, crystal clear. I heard everything. I understood everything.

I understood everything.

I gripped the chair, head down. My knuckles whitened.

"Peter?" Ross said tentatively, turning off the tape, the sharp sound of metal on metal as he dragged the device carefully towards himself making me flinch. "Do you understand?"

"Get out."

A pause. "Peter, they don't—"

"Get. Out."

A beat of silence. A chair scraping against the tile. Shuffled footsteps toward the door. The guards, shifting their positions, opening the door to follow him out. A pause. "What are you going to do?"

An excellent question. An excellent f***ing question.

"I don't know."

Silence. Shuffling footsteps. The light click as the door shut.

This room was soundproof. FRIDAY proof. From no point could you see inside this room. It was completely isolated from the rest of the Compound.

Wobbling on shaky legs, I dragged myself to the door and locked it from the inside with trembling fingers. I put my back against the door, breathing in, breathing out, and slid down until I was sitting on the cold tile, hands useless by my sides, legs stretched out in front of me.

The room was soundproof.

The room was FRIDAY proof.

I was alone.

I don't know how long I screamed.

Okay, in my defense, I DID warn you.

I'm gonna do this really quick.

Thanks for my followers (649?!) and favoriters and reviewers (OVER SIX HUNDRED?!): Puppens101, RosettaQueen20, Thebookworm33, BabyPinkPuppy, DemonSkitty, GoddessOfFanfictonn, CelinaB, starfire 25, SnowyLuna, The Striking Storms, ALonesomeAuthor, lupinsnapemalfoy, kittymyth96, TC Howl, FeniaUchiha, Ammy of Asgard, PrincessNaina, TheKingOfTheMotorMouths, BecomingFearless1F, monkeybaby, mpathy, GobsmackedGirl, OneOfYourFans, Silvermane1, Bob is a ninja, katwinchester, Seawell, doglover500, and the two Guests!

Guest (I have no idea why you thought…): aww thank you so much! Oh well yeah there's that…hahaha sorry…

Bob is a ninja: That's the best thing I've ever heard. XD that's our Tony. It gets intense! And..ummm…think I'm keeping my arms X'D; hahahahaha I'm dead thanks for reviewing

Guest (Thanks for the update): Thanks so much for the review and for reading!

OneOfYourFans: Hahaha no problem. Yep! Hehehehehe I like angst….

GobsmackedGirl: XD Hahaha I'm glad you liked it! Hahahahahahahaha omg please adopt a puppy named Peter that would be adorable.

I'm going to hide for the next week. Bye!

Oh, but before I go…

…Chapter 27 is worse.