Chapter 26: Unexpected
Renji waited as Byakuya climbed the Council Hall steps and approached him. He had no idea what to expect. The last time Renji had seen his taichou, Byakuya had just told him to close the Spirit Link. He left quickly after that, not even giving Renji time to respond. His reiatsu had been so disturbed, Renji worried that there might have been some kind of danger…but after a time, the reiatsu calmed and Renji was finally able to sleep. It was the only time he had ever slept alone in their bed…and it was a lot colder without Byakuya. Renji was surprised at just how much he felt his taichou's absence.
Before falling asleep he had thought about the Spirit Link. And he had tried to close it. It should have been easy. Byakuya had explained how and he had followed the directions to the letter…but it was still as if he hadn't made up his mind at all. That was when Abarai Renji realized just how much his taichou meant to him. He wasn't ready to accept the Spirit Link, but he was ready to admit that he was very much in love with Byakuya…and he was more than ready now to move forward with the wedding. He hadn't been before. He had made himself say the words, but he hadn't felt them in his heart. He felt them now. He felt them and he wanted more than anything to tell him. Abarai Renji was stunned when his taichou reached him, said nothing, did not even look at him, but only took his hand and led him inside.
Byakuya led him to the head of the table and they sat down beside each other. Renji leaned toward him, but at that moment Noriko stood and turned to face Byakuya.
"Lord Byakuya," she said in a stiff, formal tone, "You have been called to Council as you have broken the rules of courtship…again. Council warned you that if you wished to continue your courtship of Abarai Renji, you must adhere to those rules or you must abandon the relationship. You agreed to the rules, yet once again, you tried to circumvent them."
Byakuya stood and Renji felt his reiatsu flare in warning.
"Councilor, I admit that I did break the rules of courtship, but only after Council took disturbing steps to force me into violation of the agreement."
Noriko glared at him.
"And do you have proof of this?" she asked.
"I do not need it to see what is before my own eyes. This Council smilingly offered compromise, then tried to undo it with subterfuge."
"There is no proof of a connection to Council. Those people could have acted alone," Noriko said, meeting his eyes squarely.
Byakuya glared back, his reiatsu rising.
"Kuchiki Noriko," Baykuya said in a low, seething voice, "I had thought you to be an improvement over the last Head Councilor, who ended up attempting to kill Renji and me. It seems that I was mistaken."
He let his eyes scan the faces of the councilors for a moment.
"My grandfather did much to improve relations in our clan. He did much to strengthen it by laying the groundwork for cooperation between clan leader and council," Byakuya said, his voice softening with memory, "In addition to that, he personally saw to my training and preparation. I have been raised to lead, to value the honor and the legacy of the Kuchiki family…and to protect those things with all of the power I wield. He warned me that this would not be easy, but that it was my duty to see that our family's honor and position among the noble houses was secured. To this day, no clan's power exceeds ours. No clan dares to oppose us. Our clan is honored, respected…feared. I have seen to my promises."
He paused for a moment, releasing a long sigh.
Byakuya…the link is still open. Just tell them.
"This Council has opposed my association with Abarai Renji under two sets of leaders. The first opposed it on the grounds that it would dishonor our clan…and that it would cause me to forget my promises. They opposed it because they believed I would not marry and produce heirs. And while their arguments were understandable, they were not willing to hear anything their own clan leader offered in words. We were driven to the violence that shattered that Council.
The one that replaced it is much more adept in negotiation. Once understanding that I intended to keep my promises and that I would obey the rules of courtship and marry Abarai Renji in thirty days…that we would produce heirs, this Council gave its support to my union with Renji."
Taichou, what are you doing? Why don't you use the link? Isn't that why you opened it?
Byakuya ignored him and continued.
"But this Council dishonors itself. This Council shames itself by negotiating falsely, then compounding it by undermining the agreement and lying to hide the transgressions. And why? If I indicated a willingness to keep our agreements, then it wasn't concern for our clan that led this Council to take these egregious steps. That leaves me with two possibilities. Either this council still regards Abarai Renji as being unworthy, but lacks the backbone to oppose me directly…or this Council is doing this as a means of punishing me for the events that brought down the last Council. It may be that it is some of each, but neither is tolerable."
Taichou…Taichou, why don't you just tell them? You opened the Spirit Link to protect me from them. Once they know, they will not oppose you. Taichou!
"Whether you are cowards or liars or both, you have brought dishonor to this family. My relationship with Abarai Renji has been in the open for some time…and has earned no backlash. It is not wrong, nor does it bring dishonor to our name for me to love him. It does not make me wish to violate my promises. It makes me want to keep them.
This council indicated a concern for the protection of power…and in Renji it will be assured of that. Renji is an accomplished shinigami with great power, power he wields judiciously to enforce our laws. He has used his power to protect the life of the clan leader whose power you so desire to keep. He has stood between death and me…I am still here because of him.
If the members of this Council could see beyond the lengths of their upturned noses, they would certainly see that our clan loses nothing and only stands to gain from this union! It is my duty to protect the honor and reputation of this family, but I cannot protect that which does not exist. There is no honor in this place, and cowardice and lies have undone what reputation I sought to protect. That being true, I have only one path I may take."
Renji watched with widened eyes as Byakuya reached up and removed the kenseiken. He held the headpiece up before the council, then threw it onto the table. The kenseiken spun and slid across the table, coming to rest in front of Kuchiki Noriko. She and the rest of the council stared in disbelief.
Byakuya…what are you doing? Why didn't you just tell them? You didn't have to do this!
"If the Kuchiki family is without honor, then I will no longer wear its name."
"Lord…Byakuya," stammered Noriko, "you know…what this means."
Byakuya nodded.
"It means that I am no longer a member of this fallen clan. It means that everything not earned by my own labor is forfeit and all holdings are returned to the family trust. It means that I am no longer your leader, nor do I even leave here bearing my family name. I have made myself outcast from the noble clans. Now, I am a peasant. And because I know you will blame Renji, the power I once used to serve this family will protect Renji from it. In the parlance of the peasant class, "You can go fuck yourselves.""
Renji found himself being pulled to his feet and half dragged across the room. He finally managed to get his legs moving, but his mind was caught in a whirlwind. Byakuya Kuchiki had said what? Did he really hear it? The way the councilors were still staring as they left confirmed it.
"You…told them to go fuck themselves," he said dazedly.
"Yes, I know," Byakuya said dryly, "You should return to the manor. I removed my personal belongings before the meeting, but yours are there still. I will see you at work tomorrow. Be on time."
He turned to leave.
"Byakuya," Renji called after him, "wait! I thought that…"
"Do not concern yourself, Abarai fukutaichou. As I am not a member of the Kuchiki clan any longer, neither are we required to wed. You are released from your obligation. And I do not know why you have not closed the link, but you should do that."
"Byakuya!"
Byakuya glared at him.
"Sorry…Taichou…what about…I mean…"
He froze, still trying to gather his thoughts.
"Can we at least go somewhere and talk about this?" he asked.
Byakuya sighed and turned toward the Squad Six office. Renji walked slowly at his side, stealing glances at him.
"What is there to say, Renji? I did what I needed to do to end Council's interference in our association. You are no longer obligated in any way. I should think that would make you happy. Isn't this what you wanted?"
"What…you mean you throwing away everything you have so you could…?"
"So I could choose my own path. That's all I was doing, Renji. I can no longer tolerate those people making my choices. It is no more right than me trying to make your choices for you. Even though they were driven by the desire for power and I was driven by love, both were equally wrong. You must see that."
They reached the Squad Six office and entered. Closing the door behind them. Renji went to make some tea, then returned and sat down in a chair next to Byakuya's desk.
"Byakuya, what happens now?" Renji asked.
Byakuya took a sip of tea.
"How do you mean, Renji?"
"Well, do you have a place to stay? What about Rukia? I mean…"
"I spoke to Rukia before I went to the meeting. She is staying with her squad until I secure a new home for us. Renji…I may not have the manor or holdings I did, but my earnings as taichou are more than sufficient. While I appreciate your concern, of course, I can take care of myself."
Renji nodded.
"I know. I just wanted to be sure."
Byakuya turned to the stack of papers on his desk.
"If you will excuse me now, Renji, I have work to do."
Renji placed a hand on his arm.
"Taichou, look, I still have things I wish to say to you."
Byakuya said nothing, but only gazed down quietly at the hand that touched his arm.
"I appreciate you standing up to them like that. I think it was amazing. But I don't understand. Couldn't you have avoided giving up your position in the clan by just telling them about the Spirit Link?"
Byakuya shook his head.
"The link has not been fully formed. In its initial phase, it does open our minds to each other and improves communication, but the souls are not fully entwined until both have accepted the link…and therefore, if one dies, the other may or may not be affected. It would have been a very dangerous bluff, which if seen through, could have ended in disaster. But it hardly matters. Renji, my opening that link was a mistake. And now I think you need to fix it. Close the link. Reject it. That will set things right."
"I tried closing it. It wouldn't close. And I couldn't ask you what that meant, because you left. Taichou, I feel like closing the link will hurt you, and I don't want to do that," Renji said, moving his hand from Byakuya's arm to touch his face.
Byakuya sighed and closed his eyes for a moment.
"Renji, you should not concern yourself with that. I took a reckless action and there is a price I will pay for it. I was not looking forward to paying the price for my actions and I chose to leave so that I might come to terms with the consequences privately. But I am here now. And I told you, I am fine with it. All that remains to be done is for you to close the link. Focus on it and reject it. It will fade and this can be over. But really, Renji, letting it continue any longer borders on cruelty. So, I would ask that you take care of this now so that we can begin to move on."
"But that isn't what you want. I know that," Renji said quietly.
Byakuya reached up and gently removed the warm hand from his face.
"Renji, it isn't any more right for you to decide what I think than it was for me to decide what you think. Before we take a step like that, there are some pathways that we have left to travel. Someday we may reach that point, but it has to arrive in its own time. I am fine with waiting."
"Can't I just hold off on doing anything? You know, just leave it the way it is?" Renji asked.
"Do you wish for me to have a constant reminder of my foolishness? I imagine it would be a just consequence, but I would really prefer that you spare me that."
He took Renji's hands.
"Just focus on the link and reject it. Do it now, Renji."
Renji stared into the tired gray eyes and read the barely concealed pain beneath them. But he knew the pain would be worse the longer he waited. He focused on the connection that was between them, enjoying for a moment that very deep resonance, then looking into the dark gray eyes, he willed it to close. Slowly, the connection faded and Renji felt suddenly alone…as if he had just lost a part of himself. He swallowed hard. He hadn't been prepared for that. He looked up at Byakuya and noticed that his expression hadn't changed. There was only that same melancholy he had seen before.
"There," he said quietly, "things have been made right. Now, Renji, we do need to get some things done here. You should start getting caught up with those reports."
Sighing, Renji moved back to his own desk and started sorting through the stack of papers. He really tried to focus, but his eyes kept finding their way to the silent, stoic man across the room from him. He wondered what Byakuya was feeling. It had to be bad. He had given up his title, his home…so much, just to have the privilege of losing the Spirit Link and the chance to marry Renji. And still, he sat quietly reading reports and filling out paperwork as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened…as if his heart wasn't breaking.
"Abarai," Byakuya said looking up, "take these files over to the Squad One office. Soutaichou requested that they be delivered to him today."
"Hai, Taichou," Renji said, picking up the files and walking out the door.
As the door closed behind Renji, Byakuya sighed and stood. He unwound the ginpaku kazahana no uzuginu from around his throat and left it hanging over the back of his chair. He left the office and walked into the Taichou's quarters, closing the door behind him. He slipped the haori off of his shoulders and placed it on its peg, then sat down on the bed and leaned back against the pillows, looking out the window, watching as a soft rain began to fall.
He heard the office door open and felt the touch of Renji's reiatsu as his fukutaichou returned. There was a moment of hesitation, then he heard footsteps coming across the room, into the hallway and stopping at his door. There was a soft knock on the door.
"Taichou?"
"Come," Byakuya replied softly.
The door opened and Renji walked in, carrying a cup of tea.
"I brought you some tea, Taichou."
"Arigato, Abarai, you may leave it there."
Renji set the tea on the nightstand and studied the man stretched out on the bed, his eyes turned to the window, watching the rain fall. It seemed to Renji that he looked lonely…sad.
"Was there something else, Abarai?" Byakuya asked, not looking up at the subordinate who was staring at him.
"Yes, actually there is something else," Renji said, moving forward and sitting down on the bed next to Byakuya.
The dark gray eyes rose to meet his, still carrying the weight of melancholy.
"Taichou…I know you're in pain. And a lot of that pain is there because of me. I'm sorry for that and I want to help. How can I help you?"
Byakuya blinked slowly, then his eyes returned to the window.
"Leave me for now, Renji."
"It can't have been easy walking away from your family like that, Taichou," Renji said softly, "even though they are really hard to deal with, you've worked hard to protect the honor and reputation of your clan. You did that because you loved your grandfather and I know you wanted to make him proud by carrying on his work, trying to improve relations between clan leader and council."
"And I failed miserably."
"No," said Renji, placing a hand on his shoulder, "You didn't fail, Byakuya, they did. They were the ones who used lies, manipulation and violence to get what they wanted. They wouldn't listen to reason or honestly negotiate. You did what you had to do. You aren't like them anyway, Byakuya. You must see that."
Byakuya stared harder out the window.
"But if I don't fit into my own family, then where do I fit in?" he whispered.
Renji reached out and pulled Byakuya into his arms.
"You fit here," he said, capturing his taichou's warm lips with his own, "You fit right here."