A/N: Sorry folks it's taken me so long to get this update out. I'm a first time mother, and my unborn baby girl has been very wiggly lately. Making it hard to sit in front of my computer and write stuff down. Apparently she doesn't like to feel like she's being squished, who knew? So again apologies for taking so long, and I hope it will be worth the wait.
Anders hadn't seen Hawke in three days. She hadn't come home when he was around, and Varric and Isabela were keeping her whereabouts a secret, though he could tell the two rogues knew. He was frustrated, he wanted so badly to apologize to her and he couldn't. He wasn't even sleeping well at night; his actions in the fade followed him even in his nightmares.
I deserve it, he thought to himself as he paced their bedroom raking his hand through his loose blonde locks. I betrayed her trust, trying to help the greater good. How is attacking the one I love going to protect her? I was a fool but I cannot find her. I will have to wait for her to return. I can't believe that demon got to me, I should know better. Anders scoffed at his own stupidity and flung himself on the bed. It was late, close to the middle of the night, but sleep evaded the healer. Leandra had stayed up later and later each night hoping her daughter would return. She was even more worried than Anders, since she didn't understand why her daughter was staying away so long.
Anders heard a loud thump from the front door of the estate, but he didn't move from the bed. He heard the hurried clapping of Leandra's heels across the tiled foyer heading from the library to the door. She had personally been answering the door the last few days, propriety and Bodahn aside, hoping it is her daughter knocking.
"Anders, help!" Leandra panicked cry resounded through the house. "Marianna's hurt."
Anders bolted from the bed, and took the stairs down to the foyer two at a time. Leandra was bent over Hawke's body frantically calling for her daughter to open her eyes. Mari was covered in bruises, stab wounds, and arrows. She also smelled like a brewery, and was wearing the same clothes from three days ago. Anders quickly glanced out the door to see who could have attacked Hawke in the middle of the night and he noticed two female rogues carefully walking their way across the courtyard, their blades drawn heading towards the open doorway of the Amell estate. Anders heard Hawke's mother gasp when she followed his gaze out into the night.
"Leandra, when I move Mari, you have to lock and bar the door," Anders quickly advised. Leandra nodded, and Anders pulled Hawke into the entryway to clear the door. Leandra slammed it closed, locking and then throwing the bar to prevent further entry. Without fear of impending attack, Anders bent over Hawke and began examining her, trying to find out why she was unconscious.
"Who were those women?" Leandra whispered, kneeling next to Anders ready to help him should he ask.
"I would guess the Silent Sisters, the current Hightown gang," Anders answered. "Leandra, I need you to get me some water, fresh towels, washcloths, and bandages. I'm going to carry Mari to our room." Leandra hurried off to follow Anders instructions, and Anders carefully pick up Hawke, and carried her battered body to their room. As he carried her, he noticed a purple lump forming near one of her temples as if she had been struck by the hilt of a blade. That would explain why she was unconscious, she probably had a concussion.
He carefully placed Hawke on the bed, and tried to relieve some of the swelling on her temple, while he was healing her, Leandra bustled into the room carrying a bowl of water, the towels, washcloths, as well as Anders' medical bag from the clinic. Anders held a cold spell in his hand and flicked his finger into the bowl of water creating several lumps of ice.
"Leandra, take the ice I just created, and put it in a damp washcloth, and place it over the purple bruise on her temple. That will help contain the swelling in her temple while I heal the rest of her body." He rummaged through his bag and pulled out a thin vial. "Try to get her to drink this, slowly. It's a sleeping draught and will make sure she doesn't wake up suddenly while we're working."
Anders began working methodically; first he took care of the arrows, as they posed the most danger currently. She had one arrow in her thigh, one in her shoulder, and two in her abdomen. Due to the placement of each arrow, he was going to have to cut them out; he couldn't push the arrows through. He reached into Hawke belt and found her hidden dagger. He began cutting her robes away from her body, with extra caution around the arrows. Once he was sure the sleeping draught had taken effect, he muttered a quick apology to his love and then began cutting her thigh muscle open to remove the arrow. Hawke groaned in pain and Leandra had to hold her daughter down to keep her still. As soon as he had the arrow free, he healed the area and repeated this process for the next three arrows. The rest of Hawke's injuries were fairly minor in comparison and in very little time Anders had her as healed as he could. He grabbed another cloth and wetting it from the bowl began cleaning the blood from Hawke's unconscious form.
"I've done as much as I can," Anders informed Leandra. "With the concussion all we can do is wait and hope. I'll keep an eye on her. Why do you go get some sleep?"
Leandra gave Anders a watery smile of thanks before leaving their bedroom, heading towards her own. Anders carefully took off Hawke's breastband and smalls, since they were covered in blood, and slipped her into new smalls and a sleep shirt before pulling the covers over her unconscious form. He pulled one of the chairs from in front of the fire close to the bed, and taking her hand watched her sleep until he too drifted off into the fade.
Anders woke up, still holding Hawke's hand but it looked as if she hadn't moved the whole night. He checked her vitals and relief flooding through him when he heart beat was still strong.
"Come back to me love," Anders whispered to her sleeping form.
"Anders…" Mari moaned out in her sleep.
"I'm here, love."
"Why…" she asked listlessly, still asleep.
"Maker I don't know," Anders spoke honestly, knowing she really couldn't hear his answer. "I should know better being a mage, but she said she could help me take care of you, protect you. And then when you attacked me, I just got so angry. I thought you were taking that chance away from me, trying to keep me at arms length. The demon twisted my desires and turned me against the one person I love more than anything in Thedas. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, if only you would wake up. Please Mari my love come back to me. Wake up."
Mari finally shifted in her sleep, and Anders allowed his hand to drop away from hers. He stood from the chair, and stretched the sore muscles away from sleeping in the chair for several hours. He heard a soft knock, and Leandra opened the door slowly before coming in followed closely by Orana carrying a tray laden with food and tea.
"How is she?" Leandra asked, hustling over to her daughter's still sleeping form.
"She hasn't woken up yet, her brain is still damaged from swelling but I think she'll pull through she just needs rest and time," Anders explained stepping back to let Leandra take his place in the armchair. "This is a lot of food Leandra."
"Yes, well, I haven't eaten yet," Leandra explained with a small flustered smile. "And a part of me was hoping Marianna would be awake so I had Orana prepare enough for the three of us."
Anders chuckled lightly as he got tea ready for himself and Hawke's mother. She smiled gratefully at him as she accepted the cup and returned her focus to her daughter. A sudden idea occurred to Anders, and before he could think about how her mother would react, he asked the question.
"Leandra, I was wondering if I could get your blessing to ask for Mari's hand," he blurted out, not daring to look at his love's mother for fear of being rejected.
"Anders," Leandra gasped, setting her teacup on the bedside table and taking his hands, "Do you mean it? You want to marry my daughter?"
"I do," he admitted, meeting the woman's soft gaze feeling a little surprised at the smile that lit up her features. "She means the world to me, and though I'm not sure who would actually marry us since I'm a known apostate, I would still like to try, even if it's just a private ceremony here."
"Oh Anders," Leandra gushed, enveloping the mage in a hug. "I have been waiting for you to ask me this since I first met you. I knew how you felt for my daughter and I would be more than happy to have you join out family. When do you plan on asking her?"
Anders chuckled nervously before answering: "I actually haven't even thought about any of that, the idea just came to me a moment ago and I blurted it out."
"Swept away in worry and passion just like my Malcolm," Leandra chuckled, her eyes glittering with happiness and unshed tears. "Wait here," she instructed before bustling out of the room. She came back a few moments later, clutching her hands to her chest protectively. She glanced into her hands before showing him the ring. "This was the ring Malcolm gave me when we were wed, I know it's not much but it's a ring that represents an eternal love that still exists today. I would like you to have it," she finished placing the ring in Anders palm.
"I think its perfect Leandra," Anders gulped back the tears he felt pricking his eyes at Leandra's heartfelt acceptance as he moved to his wardrobe to hide the wedding band amongst his belongings. "Now I just have to get her to forgive me before I can ask for her hand."
"Why do you need her forgiveness?" Leandra queried, getting a plate of food ready to break her morning fast.
"I did something idiotic on a mission," Anders explained. "It's why she hasn't been here the last few days, she was extremely upset."
"It'll blow over, she's always been a very passionate person," Leandra promised, sitting down in the armchair near her daughter. "Slow to anger, but it burns white hot for a short time before it is forgotten and she moves on. I know she'll forgive you."
"I hope you are right," Anders muttered, getting his own plate and tea ready.
"If you need to go to the clinic today, I can stay and watch Marianna," Leandra told Anders. "I had Bodahn send out messages to the rest of her friends so they know what's going on. I'm sure many of them will show up today at some point to see how she's doing. If anything changes we'll let you know."
Anders nodded in gratitude before finishing his food, and making his way out into the mid-morning Hightown traffic.
It had been a stressful and disappointing day for Anders, he kept expecting to receive a message that his love was awake and she wanted to see him. His heart sank when he entered the bedroom to see Hawke, sitting up, awake, and laughing with Isabela on the bed next to her. The conversation ceased as soon as Anders entered the room, and the two black-haired ladies watched him as he moved to Hawke's side.
"How are you feeling?" Anders asked, trying to catch her gaze.
"I'm fine," was her curt reply, looking up at him with very guarded eyes.
"When did you wake up?"
"Shortly after high sun."
"Why didn't anyone come tell me? I've been worried sick about you all day!" Anders cried out in exacerbation.
"Maybe because she didn't want you here," Isabela supplied quietly.
"Please Mari, I know I screwed up. I'll do whatever you want to make it up to you," Anders pleaded with Hawke, taking her reluctant hands in his. "Just give me a chance to apologize."
"You could at least listen to him sweetness," Isabela prompted, elbowing her friend softly in the side. "You already forgave Broody."
"You already forgave Fenris?" Anders shouted. "And you won't even look at me?"
"Fenris is not a mage," Hawke began softly, but each declaration became louder with her anger. "Fenris does not live with me. Fenris does not claim to love me. Fenris is not tempted on a daily basis by demons in his sleep. Fenris didn't know any better."
Isabela for once, kept her mouth shut, but she was smiling in understanding at her mage friend.
"I know," Anders whispered in defeat, kneeling on the floor at her side.
"Isabela, can you give us a moment?" Hawke asked turning to meet the golden gaze of her close friend.
"Only if you share all the dirty details later," the pirated purred getting up from the bed and sauntering out of the room closing the door behind her. Anders stared at the closed door a bit confused at the pirates last statement, Hawke's next words broke him out of his reverie.
"What if I don't want to forgive you…" Hawke began, and pain crushed Anders heart.
"Let me try to make it up to you, somehow," Anders begged, reaching for her hand. "I'll do whatever you want."
"Yet?" Hawke finally finished her question causing Anders to look at her in confusion.
"What if I don't want to forgive you yet?" Hawke asked a devious twinkle in her eyes. "I hear make-up sex is amazing."
Anders gulped as desire flooded through his body as her words sank in. He looked up at Hawke, and she bent over kissing him, her passion only fueling the fire raging in his body. He surged up from the floor, not breaking their kiss as he joined her on the bed. He pressed his throbbing erection against her core, and was surprised with how wet she was already. He broke the kiss to look at her.
"How long have you been planning this?" he asked, reaching down to take off his boots.
"I meant for it to happen last night," she admitted with a little giggle, the devilish look still on her face. "But then I got attacked and you know how that ended."
"I take it Isabela was in on it?" Anders chuckled as he continued to remove his clothing.
"She may have been the one to give me the idea," she grinned, kneeling on the bed to assist in his clothing removal.
"I don't know whether to be angry or thankful for your friendship with her. I think she's turned you into quite the little minx."
"I was like this already," she purred, kissing his chest and making him tremble under her hot mouth. "You just bring it out in me."
"I'm going to take that as a good thing," Anders murmured huskily as her mouth traveled south to his breeches.
"It's a very good thing," she hummed, as she undid the ties of his pants with her teeth.
The rest of the evening, Anders worshipped the mage who had entered into his life and changed him inexplicably. His warden stamina being an advantage as they made love the rest of the night, only breaking once when Orana brought them dinner from Isabela's departing instructions.