Alice woke up and stretched. She was excited to see Jimmy today. She had wanted to be sure before she told him and she was sure now. It was a couple of months now since she'd last bled and as soon as she stood up, she knew she would expel any remaining contents of stomach. Most women hated that part, but Alice was just so happy to be pregnant that she would endure the sickness that came each morning. It reminded her of what she had prayed so hard for. It was time to tell Jimmy though. She knew just how she wanted to do it too. They would be married on Thursday and she wanted to save the news for their wedding night.
Alice was sad she wouldn't see Jimmy until tomorrow, but she needed the time to finish her wedding dress. It wasn't anywhere near as fancy as the ones she'd seen on occasion in the town of James Creek. There wasn't any lace or embellishments on her dress. It was a plain, but a beautiful shade of sky blue. Dresses amongst the Peacemakers were never worn just once, but a dress for a wedding needed to be new. This dress would become her Sunday dress and would also be the dress she would be buried in when she died. The color blue was the traditional color for a wedding dress among the Peacemakers. She didn't have a lot of choice on the color but the style was up to her so she picked a flattering style and hoped Jimmy would like it. The hem was the last thing she had left on the dress. She would get to it after she had dressed for the day and helped with breakfast.
When Alice was back in her room, the first thing she did was to sit down in the rocking chair and take out the thimble Jimmy had given her. It was simple, yet shiny and he had given it to her with his whole heart. She treasured it. It meant that he truly understood her. The simple thimble always reminded her that she was loved dearly and that is exactly what she needed today. It was a little piece of him she could hold close. He was never far from her thoughts and this tiny metal thimble reminded her with every stitch, how much she loved him.
Kid squinted his eyes as the light from the window temporarily blinded him. He tried to remember where he was and what had happened. Right now he couldn't recall a thing and all he felt was pain.
"Well it's about time you woke up, Sonny," a man's voice said. "I'm Dr. Harris. Do you know where you are?"
Kid lifted his hand to his head and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He was still fighting off the groggy feeling one gets when they first awake, but his body ached and he felt like he got trampled by stampeding horses.
"Yeah," Kid answered, "I'm in James Creek."
"Do you remember anything about last night?" Dr. Harris asked.
Kid reached into the depths of his memory and went through the moment he arrived and tried to remember. As soon as his memory filled in the blanks, Kid tried to spring from the bed.
"Jimmy," he said, "I've got to get to Jimmy to warn him."
"Whoa, hold on there, Sonny," Dr. Harris said trying to gently push Kid back into bed. "You're in no shape to rush out of here."
"You don't understand, Doc," Kid argued. "I have a friend to warn. Those men..."
"Oh, don't you worry about those men," Dr. Harris said cutting Kid off. "You got 'em. They won't be causing nobody else no trouble."
Kid relaxed a little and let out a big sigh as he sank back into the bed. "Thank God," he said.
The doctor started to redress his wound and Kid realized that he had taken a bullet to the shoulder. That explained why he was in pain. He probably lost a fair amount of blood too which would account for his feeling weak.
"Doc, how long til I can get out of here?" Kid asked anxiously.
"Oh I think if you promised not to overdo it, I could let you go this afternoon," Dr. Harris said.
"Thanks, Doc," Kid said. "Can I ride?"
"Oh I wouldn't advise riding unless it's your only way to get around," Dr. Harris advised, "But as long as you didn't ride faster than a walk, you should be alright. Just try not to use that arm."
"I need to get to the Peacemakers. I have a good friend there and I need to get to him as fast as I can."
"Well, I have a house call to make out that way," the doctor said. "I can give you a ride."
"Thanks, Doc."
Emma sat down at the edge of Lou's bed and looked over her girls. Rainie was asleep in the cradle Buck made next to the side of the bed Lou was sleeping on. Emma knew Lou wasn't sleeping even though it would look like she was to the casual observer. It seemed that Lou was always sleeping or pretending to if she wasn't feeding the baby. She always seemed to leave Rainie's care to Buck. It concerned Emma that Lou didn't seem to want to hold the baby other than to feed her and Emma could see Buck was starting to notice too. Emma had seen the pained look in his eyes whenever Lou would pass the baby off to someone else after feeding.
"Lulabelle, I know you're not sleeping," Emma said as she rested a hand on Lou's arm.
Lou tried hard to keep up the illusion, but gave it up knowing that she gave herself away by the deep blush on her face at being called out on her lie. She slowly opened her eyes.
"Sweetheart, is there something bothering you about the baby?" Emma asked gently.
Lou tried not to cry but she let the tears gather and fall. "I'm not a good mother, Emma," she said plainly. "Rainie doesn't like me."
"What do you mean, Rainie doesn't like you?" Emma asked shocked.
"Well, she always cries when I hold her unless I'm feeding her," Lou answered. "She never cries for Buck. I don't know what to do."
Emma understood the anxiety that comes with being a new mother and her heart was breaking for her girl.
"Sweetheart, sometimes these things take time and patience," Emma said. "Babies pick up on all sorts of things that we may not be aware of. Are you scared of her?"
"I…Emma…no, of course I'm not scared of her," Lou said unconvincingly. Lou looked away and tried not to let see her embarrassment. "Oh, who am I kidding, Emma, I terrified of her."
"Oh, Honey, you're not the first new mother to feel scared of her baby," Emma said comfortingly. "You just need to relax and know that she loves you. Everything will be alright, you'll see."
Rainie started to cry and Lou looked at Emma with pleading eyes.
"Here's your chance, Lou," Emma said encouragingly. "She needs her mamma. Go on now."
"I can't, Emma, I know she won't stop crying," Lou said.
"Lou, honey, she's your baby and she needs you," Emma said gently, "She probably needs to be changed. Why don't you check?"
Emma folded the blanket back uncovering Lou. Lou hesitantly got up and hovered over the cradle. She reached into the cradle and picked up the baby. Lou looked up at Emma as Rainie kept crying.
"Help me, Emma, please," Lou begged.
"You're doing fine, Sweetheart," Emma coaxed. "Let's change her."
Emma talked Lou through a diaper change just as she did for Buck over a week ago. Lou did really well, but Rainie was still fussy.
"Just relax, Lou," Emma said as Lou tried to comfort her baby.
"Why won't she stop crying, Emma?" Lou asked.
"Just give it some time, Sweetheart," Emma answered. "Try sitting in the rocking chair and just relax."
Lou sat down and Rainie kept crying. Buck appeared in the doorway with a concerned look on his face and Emma held him back. With a quick exchange of looks, Buck understood and was supportive but weary of Emma's plan.
"Buck, you have to take her," Lou pleaded, "I can't get her to stop crying."
"You're doing fine, Lou," Buck assured her. "Just close your eyes and take a deep breath. Relax and let her feel how calm you can be. Think of how much you love her."
Lou did as Buck suggested and was rewarded by Rainie slowly quieting down.
"That's it Lou," Emma said proudly. "You've got it."
Rainie stopped crying and started to hiccup. Emma let Buck enter the room and he knelt next to Lou and gave her a soft kiss. Emma decided her work here was done and left the room closing the door behind her.
Rosemary was housed in a cabin pouring over a map of the Oregon Trail. This was a cabin she had used often lately. It afforded her access to many of the supplies she needed and it afforded her a close enough residence to keep tabs on the man she wanted and needed in her life. She needed to keep her mind on business right now though. She looked back at her map and traced the Trail with her finger tip. She thought it might be a viable option for freed slaves once the war was over. Her sources in Washington had told her that President Lincoln was entertaining the idea of freeing the slaves in the south. Some of those people would want a fresh start and a new place to settle. She also thought this might be the perfect time to try to do what John Brown couldn't. She didn't want to raid Harper's Ferry, but perhaps hitting a supply line would work and she could arm a slave revolt. It could turn the tide of the war. Still she needed a strong leader her people would follow and someone whose very presence would increase their number of recruits. She needed 'Wild Bill' Hickock. There just wasn't another way to do it.
Emmet was supposed to check in with her this morning and it worried her that she hadn't heard from him or seen him today. She sent a man into James Creek to look for him and his men. She checked Isaiah's pocket watch. Jonathan should be back any time now with news. This had to work. She had written the terms of Alice's release herself. The letter was written and Emmet would deliver it tomorrow. She just couldn't figure out why Emmet wouldn't check in with her today. He knew how important this was to her.
There was a knock on the door and Rosemary's thoughts were jarred back into the present. She opened the door and found her man, Jonathan standing in front of her with a long face and his hat in his hands.
"What's happened?" She asked quickly and with a great deal of concern. "Where's Emmet?"
"He's dead ma'am," Jonathan answered, "Smitty and Barry too."
"How?" Rosemary asked with alarm. It was all she could do not to wrap her hands in her own hair and pull.
"Some kid out drew them in a gunfight," Jonathan explained.
"All three of them?" Rosemary asked as she started to crumple a piece of paper from the desk in her hand.
"They did get one shot in him, but it didn't matter."
"Does this kid have a name?"
"All's people knew about him was he was worried about someone named 'Jimmy' and that he rode a red and white paint," Jonathan remarked.
Rosemary could feel her eyes narrow. Of course he would be here for the wedding.
"Thank you, Jonathan. That will be all."
Everything had gone wrong and she didn't know how to fix it. She felt the hot tears in her eyes. Isaiah's dream couldn't die. She needed to save it and James was the only way. She needed to calm down and think. Pulling a chair out, Rosemary sat down and smoothed out her skirt. Her palms were sweaty and it distracted her more. She wiped them on her against the heavy fabric of her skirt and breathed deeply. There was only one thing left for her to do.
Rosemary started to organize her maps and lists. She couldn't leave them out in the open while they were away. Their plans must not slow down, and she knew what she needed to do. She had a wedding to stop. She went outside and readied her men.
Kid stepped off from the doctor's buggy and untied Katy from the back. The doctor had bandaged him up but good and placed his arm in a sling, but that couldn't stop him from getting up on Katy's back.
The first person Kid spotted at the bruder hof was Jacob and he kindly gave Kid directions to Jimmy's house. The garden out front of Jimmy's house was nicely tilled and it looked like it might be freshly planted after a quick harvest of early spring vegetables. Kid surveyed Jimmy's house and concluded that his friend and brother was preparing for a large family. This made Kid smile. He dismounted and tied Katy to the hitching post.
Katy's whinny brought Jimmy out of the house and the two brothers embraced.
"I didn't think you'd make it, Kid," Jimmy said happily.
"Truthfully, Jimmy, I was hoping I had a reason to miss it," Kid said and Jimmy did not miss the melancholy in his friend's voice.
"Lou have the baby?" Jimmy asked.
"Yeah, Buck's baby," Kid answered sadly. "She's adorable, Jimmy. She's got Lou's big eyes and Buck's nose."
"Oh, no, poor thing," Jimmy said with a laugh.
"It's not a big nose," Kid assured him. "It fits her face and it's just the same shape. It looks cute on her."
"I'll take your word on it," Jimmy said. "What'd they name her?"
"Spring Rain, Rainie for short."
Jimmy nodded his appreciation. "So are you going to keep me in suspense?" he asked.
"What do you mean, Jimmy?"
"That shoulder wound," Jimmy pointed out. "Which one of them did it, Buck or Lou?"
Kid smiled but then his face turned stone serious. "Jimmy, we have to talk about Rosemary Burke."
Jimmy's brow furrowed. "She did this to you?" he asked.
"No, but some men she sent did," Kid answered. "Relax, they won't be bothering you. I made sure of it, but I can't help but think she's lurking out there somewhere close by."
"Come into the house and tell me everything you know," Jimmy said and grabbed Kid's gear off of Katy's back.
Kid and Jimmy had spent the night going over every move Rosemary Burke had made starting with when Jimmy first met her and going through the time she spent in Rock Creek trying to sway him to her cause. Jimmy was weary and didn't understand the obsession this woman had with him. The latest attempt really scared Jimmy. He couldn't let Rosemary hurt Alice.
It was well after midnight, before the two friends turned in for the night. Jimmy rested but did not sleep. He didn't know how to reason with someone that was obviously unreasonable. In the past he'd just let his gun do the talking, but he couldn't do that now. Besides the fact that Rosemary was a woman, and he long since never condoned violence toward women, he made vows and oaths about violence when he became a peacemaker. The only thing he had was his mind and his courage to stand up no matter what it meant. He silently prayed he would be able to keep his family and community safe without letting down himself or his new family. This would be his biggest test yet.
Morning came early for Jimmy. He was never much of an early riser when he was with the Express, but he'd changed when he joined the Peacemakers. He didn't get up early to do chores. He got up early to live his life. Jimmy padded down the stairs of his house and inhaled deeply at the aroma of fresh coffee. Someone was up and making breakfast.
Kid poured a cup of coffee for himself and one for Jimmy when he saw the other man come through the door.
"Kid you didn't have to do all this," Jimmy said as he accepted the cup.
"This is your wedding day, Jimmy," Kid reminded him, "You need someone to make sure you take care of yourself today."
"And that's you?" Jimmy asked.
"Yep, that's me," Kid said with a smile. "I'm standing up for you today, so I get the job by default."
"Thanks, Kid," Jimmy said, "For everything."
Jimmy's suddenly serious face made Kid nervous.
"I know we've been through a lot in the last year," Jimmy began. "Who would have thought we've all ended up where we are now just one short year ago. We were fighting in a barn over Lou and now we're here."
"And neither of us has her," Kid said sadly.
"Aw, I didn't mean that," Jimmy said, "I mean we nearly killed each other and now here we are closer than ever."
"I'm proud of you, Jimmy," Kid said. "I don't think I could do what you've done. Put away my gun, I mean."
"I think me settling things with a gun has always been a bad idea, Kid," Jimmy said. "I think if I continued on that path it would have led me to an early grave. There is so much more I could do with my life."
"So what'd you do with them?" Kid asked hesitantly.
"The guns? I packed them away in a trunk upstairs. I couldn't just toss them out. It's a part of my past that I need to remember. Everything I used to be is in that trunk. Someday I'll know what to do with it, but not today."
"No, not today," Kid agreed. "Today we're getting you hitched."
Jimmy smiled and suddenly all he could think of was Alice.
Jimmy and Kid stepped out onto Jimmy's porch and Jimmy took a deep breath before closing the door behind him. It was time to go to the church. Jimmy was nervous like any man would be on a day such as this, but even more so for the threat that hung in his mind. He wouldn't let Rosemary or anyone else spoil this day.
The two men walked toward the church and Jimmy started to smile and his palms started to sweat. He didn't know exactly what to expect from his wedding. He knew there was a long service and he and Alice would be counseled on what marriage would mean. The whole thing would take about four hours.
Jimmy smiled and could hardly breathe when he met Alice just outside of the church. She looked absolutely beautiful to him in her sky blue dress. It was plain, but the color and cut on her made it seem like the fanciest dress he'd ever laid eyes on. Her smile made her the most beautiful bride he had ever seen.
Alice and Jimmy stood before each other and smiled. They couldn't speak for several moments.
"You look absolutely beautiful," Jimmy said. He couldn't stop looking at her. She was the only person who existed for him in that moment.
Alice blushed. "You look very handsome, too," she said.
The two joined hands and walked into the church together. Kid followed behind.
The weddings of the peacemakers were intense and long. There was singing and readings, just like most weddings, but in a peacemaker wedding several of the elders and other married people spoke about what marriage meant to them. They offered all kinds of advice and well wishes. Jimmy and Alice both felt relieved when they could get up and move, but it was only to go to another room with Jacob so he could offer counseling for the new couple. It was in the middle of this counseling that Jimmy heard the commotion and stood to look out a window. A gun had been fired and the community was starting to spill out of the church to see what and who had disturbed the happy day.
Jimmy looked out the window and frowned. His eyes dropped to the floor and he looked at Alice and thought of everything she was to him and everything he stood to lose.
"Please, James, don't go out there," Alice pleaded. "Stay with me."
"She won't go until I make her go," Jimmy said. "Only if I refuse her and send her away again will she go."
"James, we both know that's not true," Alice said sadly. "She'll just keep coming back until she gets what she wants. Stay here with me. Refuse to see her."
Jimmy didn't know what would be best he just knew he couldn't hide from this. The tears in Alice's eyes that threatened to fall broke his heart. He never wanted to see her cry.
"James, I have something to tell you," Alice said her voice shaky.
Jimmy stopped looking out the window and placed his attention solely on Alice.
"I wanted to save the news for when we were alone tonight," she said trying not to lose her composure.
"Are you alright?" Jimmy asked suddenly concerned.
"I am fine. I'm better than fine. I'm just scared you will let that woman take you away from me and, James, you can't let her."
"I could never leave you, Alice, not for any reason."
"Do you promise?"
"You have my word. Now what did you want to tell me?"
"I'm going to have a baby," Alice said looking into his eyes. She waited to gauge his reaction.
Jimmy was momentarily stunned. He felt his jaw go slack and then saw the worry in Alice's face. His open mouth soon turned into a smile.
"I'm going to be a father?" Jimmy asked sweetly.
Alice let her tears fall and nodded. Her lips curled into a smile at his reaction.
Jimmy whooped a grabbed Alice around the waist and swung her around in his arms. Then his kissed her deeply.
There happiness was disturbed as the sound of another shot pierced the air.
"Come with me and we'll face her together," Jimmy said.
Jimmy came outside with Alice's hand in his to a tense scene laid out in front of him. Kid was toe to toe with Rosemary Burke. They looked at each other with a tense stare.
"Finally!" Rosemary said in a huff. She pushed Kid out of her way on her way to Jimmy.
"Rosemary, what are you doing here?" Jimmy asked. Alice stayed by Jimmy's side and clutched his hand tighter.
"I'm trying to save you from a life of being anonymous," Rosemary answered. "I need you for the cause. It will die without you."
"I can't help you, Rosemary, I never could," Jimmy said shaking his head. "I just want to be left in peace. I made a life here and I'm happy. Please, just let me be."
"I'm sorry, James, but I can't do that," Rosemary said. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to force your hand. I can't let Isaiah's mission die. I not only promised him, but I promised myself."
"What do you mean, 'force my hand?'" Jimmy asked.
"I'm going to put up a bounty, paying two thousand dollars to be paid on proof of death," Rosemary said, "You'll never have a moment's peace for the rest of your lives."
Jimmy swallowed hard and his eyes narrowed. "I'll die when it's my time to die, Rosemary," he said, "But I won't leave my wife or this place."
"James, did you get the impression I was putting the bounty on your head?" Rosemary asked rhetorically.
Jimmy looked confused
"I'm putting the bounty on her, not you," Rosemary said indicating Alice as the target.
Jimmy tried to keep the shock from his face. A threat on his life he could handle but nobody threatened Alice. In that moment he knew he failed her. He wouldn't be able to protect her if he stayed.
Jimmy took both Alice's hands in his and led her away from Rosemary and her men. He needed to talk to Alice and make her understand. They stopped under a tree near the church. He looked over at the structure of his house a short distance away. This was to be his future with his wife and now he had a child on the way. He couldn't let anyone hurt them. He would sacrifice everything for them. This was the test and he failed it. Alice and their child were the most important things in the world to him. Jimmy would have to walk away from them to keep them safe. He had no other choice.
"I'm sorry," Jimmy said, "I'm so sorry. I really wanted this more than anything in the world, but I can't let anyone hurt you. If that means I have to leave you to protect you than…"
He couldn't finish the sentence. The lump in his throat cut off his ability to speak. Jimmy tried to collect himself, but he let his emotions out instead and tears started to roll down his cheeks.
"Please, James, do not leave me," Alice begged. "I cannot live without you with me."
"I could never live with myself if something happened to you," Jimmy choked out, "Not when I could prevent it."
"If I were killed, it would not be your fault it would be hers," Alice argued. "Please, James, do not do what you are thinking of doing."
"I'm sorry, Alice," Jimmy said, "I can't see another way. I love you too much."
Jimmy led Alice back to where Jacob stood and turned to walk toward the door of his house leaving Alice with her people. She fell to her knees and started to cry. The sound broke Jimmy's heart into pieces. He would never love anyone again. Not like he love Alice.
He sat on the bed. He needed to think this through before he went through with it. He didn't think he had a choice. Rosemary wouldn't give them one. There were no other options. She was relentless and she would torment them until she got what she wanted -until she got Wild Bill. He looked out the window and saw Alice's sad face. He didn't like seeing that look. He needed to help protect her from all of this. Alice's way was a life of peace and industry in the service to the community and the lord. He deeply respected that type of commitment. He often fought with his friends numerous times over issues dealing with honor.
He opened the trunk at the end of the bed. It contained a life abandoned -traded for a life of peace and simplicity. He pulled out the familiar black felt hat and fingered the studs on the hat band. This very hat was the signature of life headed for an early grave. He set the hat aside and picked up the twin colts. They were nestled in the trunk reverently the belts wrapped around the holsters. The ivory handles were as much a signature as the hat. Finally, he pulled out the jacket. The jacket and hat along with the guns had been seen on book covers and wanted posters. They were the trademarks of James Butler "Wild Bill" Hickok.
He stood up and fastened a colt on his hip and then tied the leather string around his thigh. He strapped on the other colt the same way. The look was foreign to him yet it seemed so right in this moment. He had chosen this and he would never look back. He couldn't. It would protect them all and he was committed. He slipped on the jacket and finally placed the hat on his head. There was a mirror in the room and he hesitantly walked over to look into it. For once he was glad Teaspoon wasn't here. He wouldn't have been able to look him in the eye and go through with this. But it needed to be done. He had nothing left and this gave him a purpose.
From the door way of the bruder hof he could see Rosemary argue with Jacob and the other elders. Their voices grew soft and he felt all the eyes drift over to him. Rosemary suddenly stopped mid-sentence and let her jaw drop. Nobody there was as shocked as the man he thought of as his brother.
He walked up to Rosemary in fact his eyes never left hers.
"You want Wild Bill?" he asked. "Well he's yours. Now leave them alone."
"Kid, I can't let you do this," Jimmy said when the shock had worn off. The look of Kid in his hat with his guns humbled him. "I can't let you become him."
"You can and you will, Jimmy," Kid said. "You have a life, you have Alice. I lost Lou and I've lost my way. Let me do this as my wedding gift to you and Alice."
"This will never work," Rosemary interrupted.
"Yes, it will," Kid said, "I'll grow my hair long and then maybe a mustache. All you have to do is call me by my name…Bill."
"Kid, I…" Jimmy began.
"No, Jimmy," Kid said facing Jimmy and putting a hand on his shoulder. "You have to stay here and live a good honest life with Alice. I'll make sure you're both safe. No one will ever come looking for you here."
Jimmy swallowed hard and tried to blink his anguish away. He looked back at Alice. She was pale and terrified. That wasn't a look he ever wanted to see again.
"Alright, you better ride safe, you hear?" Jimmy said his emotions starting to show.
"I will. Now go and finish getting married."
A peacemaker appeared with Katy saddled and ready. Kid tipped his new hat at the man and mounted up. He joined Rosemary and gave a quick look back to Jimmy and Alice. Alice was clinging to Jimmy's arm as Kid rode away. She smiled and nodded. Kid knew she would never forget what he had done for her and Jimmy. Seeing the two of them together made everything he did and was about to do worth it.