26
Taylor had to excuse herself and go back to the office to refill the water kettle, as well as raid her stash of commercial teas. The relative privacy of the office also gave her a moment to catch her breath and think uncharitable thoughts about her guests without being seen. The heroes and the ABB capes had entered a bizarre form of Cold War, neither side willing to be the first to conduct their business, speak openly against the other, or leave. It was becoming increasingly obvious to Taylor that if she ever wanted to go home, she was going to have to force conversation to continue, until both parties were satisfied.
Let's see... Lung's contingent had technically gotten here first, so hearing out the leader of the ABB was probably the correct first option. Except Lung was an asshole, and if he thought that Taylor was trying to hurry him up and get rid of him, the gang leader would likely just dig in his heels and smirk until long past sunset. And that just wasn't an option. 'Hi dad, sorry I'm late getting home, I was having a tea party slash old western stand-off with Lung and it ran kinda long.'
Yeah, no.
Taylor brushed imaginary dirt from her skirts and walked back out to the tatami mats, leaves crunching under her shoes and her shadow abruptly splitting and flickering outwards. Oh, good. She was worried things were going to go smoothly.
Taylor turned slightly and looked up, calling out over her shoulder. "Hello, Purity!"
The Empire cape had stopped her approach, hovering a dozen feet above the shrine, transfixed by the collective glares of the rest of Taylor's guests. "Is… this a bad time?" Her masked voice questioned.
"Oh, not at all. I was just serving tea. Would you care to join us?" There was a certain strange tranquility in watching everything around you go to hell. After a hesitation visible even through her corona, Purity drifted lower and took a spot on the mats across from Taylor's own seat. Taylor settled down the new kettle and tea bags, picking out an empty cup for the E88 enforcer as she said, "It was raspberry hibiscus with one sugar and lemon, right? Or did you want something else?"
"Oh— um, yes please. To the first one."
"Of course." Taylor set about making a cup. "You didn't happen to see Skidmark or any of the Merchants on your way here, did you?"
"No, I can't say I did… why?"
"Just checking."
"I'm a bit surprised any member of the E88 would come here, after last week." Battery said. She was closest in seating arrangement to the Empire cape, and after a quick comparison Taylor noted a few inches' discrepancy between Purity's distance from Battery as opposed to her distance from Lung. Taylor couldn't say she blamed Purity at all.
"Yes, they… certainly had a busy week."
"They?" Armsmaster was quick to note the choice of words. Purity tensed, and busied herself with gently squeezing a lemon slice into her tea instead of answering. Her awkward silence made Lung chuckle. Purity leaned just the slightest bit further away from the ABB leader, which only seemed to please him more.
"Ahem. If you don't mind the intrusion," Taylor said, doing her very best to keep her tone level, "I would like to return to some of the matters at hand. Battery, I believe you wanted to go over something?"
The heroine startled just a tad, then nodded and pushed forward that second folder she had brought. "Well, you've already stated your opinion on the matter, but the Protectorate would like to offer you a place within the Wards program. It's often the best choice for new parahumans, as it provides a safe environment and experts to help you practice and develop your...powers…" She trailed off, and Taylor took advantage of the pause.
"Thank you for the offer, but I must decline. Joining the Protectorate would at the least compromise my ability to keep the shrine open to anyone, since I doubt the PRT would take a permissive stance to it. Also, as I've said, I'm not a parahuman, so it would be a poor fit regardless." Taylor sipped at her tea to give herself a few seconds. "That said, the Protectorate and associated heroes or employees are as welcome here as anyone else, so please don't feel slighted by my refusal."
Lung started that rumbling laugh again. "Dismantle half of their enemies, and they offer you the privilege of chains. How unsurprising." The heroes bristled, and Lung smiled a bit wider, showing his teeth.
"From what I've heard, the Wards program offers many benefits and opportunities for later growth. It's an offer made in good faith, I think, just not one I can accept." Taylor commented. She looked over at the heroes' side of the mats, about to say more, but caught a flash of white in the side of her vision. Taylor debated for less than half a second if she really wanted to know what Sunny was doing over there.
She turned her head slightly to face Lung. "Besides. They've claimed that Sunny was involved in offering assistance, so before you arrived, they arranged to offer her part of the bounties from the Empire cape captures."
"A pittance, I am sure."
"Would accepting that count as graft?" Purity wondered aloud, drawing the attention of both sides over to her.
Surprisingly, it was Assault who answered, shaking his head. "Nah. Two reasons, one being that the capture bonuses are publicly known, and offered through the PRT rather than the Protectorate directly, so it's not a shady dealing from the heroes. Second, it's only bribery or graft if it's given for something that's been asked for. Neither the Protectorate nor the PRT asked Brushstroke or Good Dog to take any action against the E88."
Taylor listened, and tried to restrain the morbid curiosity that was building. She failed rather quickly, as a side glance confirmed that the white shape had moved closer. Sunny was several yards away yet, the wolf crawling on her belly and keeping her head as low to the ground as possible. While Assault spoke she shuffled a bit closer, letting the hero's words mask the sound of her approach. After a steadying breath Taylor smoothed her expression and instead looked at the unopened bottle of sake, sitting on the mat. People in those old movies her dad watched mixed alcohol into their drinks quite a lot. Bourbon, she thought. Maybe sake could be mixed into tea? Even if not the attempt might have to be made.
"Well, since we've established the legalities…" Lung broke in, that satisfied cat-smile starting on his face again. "I have also brought a gift, as a token of my generosity." Even with his smug at 100%, Lung kind of sounded like the words bit at him as he spoke. The ABB leader reached into his back pocket and pulled out a folded bundle of papers, because even a trapper keeper would be too professional. He used his long reach to set the papers near Taylor's knees, and she set down her tea to unfold them, silently praying that they would not be sweat-damp.
"Here, Miko. These are property deeds," Lung said, as Sunny crawled closer and carefully— carefully!—laid her head down on Armsmaster's thigh. The Tinker absently started petting her head. Taylor kept her eyes on Lung. "Five lots in total, the Shrine and the two properties on either side, for you to do with as you see fit."
"I don't think the city takes blood money, Lung," Purity seethed.
"Of course they do. They also take legal tender, and this land was purchased through legal means…" Taylor saw the exact moment Lung spotted Sunny, because the gang cape blinked behind his mask and lost his train of thought. Taylor decided to step in before he could regain it.
"That's quite kind of you, Lung. I hope you didn't trouble yourself too much for it."
"Doubtful," Purity interrupted. "His gang has cratered the property values around here, he probably got them for a steal. Lung, you know she's just a teenager so I hope you paid off the back taxes and put some into escrow, because there's no way she could pay them herself." Heads turned her way, and she scowled through her light. "What? I've worked real estate."
Lung looked absolutely affronted at the accusation, though Taylor privately thought it was a pretty good one. "Of course. You take me for a fool?"
"I take you for a brute," Purity said.
"Purity, please." Taylor cautioned, and the cape settled herself a little.
Battery started rubbing at her temples. "Hng… Brushstroke, you're going to want to find a lawyer who knows cape law, I think, since it would be better to attach these properties to your cape name and not your own. And then there's the whole mess on whether or not this place counts as non-profit, since it's a religious or a community center. Armsmaster, you have anything on Rogue ownership law…." The cape had looked over at the Tinker and spotted Sunny laying beside him. Assault noticed her eyes popping and looked over as well, the poor man accidentally swallowing tea down the wrong way.
Armsmaster hmmed to himself, holding his teacup with one hand and rubbing Sunny's ears with the other. "I don't know offhand what the intersection between Rogue capes and nonprofit organizations is, but ever since the Fallen got started I'm sure there have been lawsuits. There are some pretty stringent limitations on Rogues and capes in general, most of them relating to Thinkers or Tinkers, or the stock market. If you decide to develop any of those properties as a place of business, there will likely be a requirement for a certain percentage of your profits to be funneled into a charitable organization— there's been some pushback against that, but I know Parian ran into it a year or so ago, and I haven't kept up on any changes since then."
"That doesn't sound so bad," Taylor said.
"It probably isn't, but since you're also running a place of prayer, definitely get a lawyer because the IRS is going to notice."
"Certainly." Taylor sipped at her tea and counted to ten. "Well, I'm not sure what I'll do with them, but it is nice to have the Shrine's neutral zone extended. Thank you, Lung, it's quite a generous gift."
"Right," the gang cape said, looking between the horrified gazes of Assault and Battery and the lazy smile on Sunny's face.
"Though, that does segue into something I wanted to address," Armsmaster continued. "We'll leave you some pamphlets on Rogue cape laws, but you should be aware of a few basic rules first."
"Yes?"
At the other end of the mat, Taylor saw Purity lean in towards Battery and whisper something. The heroine put up a finger to shush her, and continued watching Armsmaster as the Tinker smiled and started listing off a few general rules. Most of them seemed like common sense and courtesy, like not using your powers on others. "Master powers in particular carry a steep penalty. There has been concern about Good Dog using a Master ability to force a change in behavior or attention."
"Oh?" Taylor said, after a moment. "Like what? Do you have an example?"
"In particular, there was a report of Good Dog compelling a law enforcement officer to stop and pet her."
"I see." Taylor set down her tea, very carefully. "I believe you're mistaken, though. I really don't think Sunny has to coerce people to pet her."
"Master/Stranger protocols would suggest otherwise." Poor Purity sounded like she'd caught Assault's asthma. Taylor just nodded, acknowledging Armsmaster's concerns. Then she squared her shoulders and looked him in the visor.
"You're petting her right now."
Armsmaster's hand stopped. He glanced down to his right. Sunny, head on his lap, looked up at him and started thwapping her tail on the ground in a wag.
"SON OF A BITCH!"
Taylor looked through the documents Lung had given her while Purity hovered over her shoulder and pointed out places to sign now, and ones to sign later, and they both ignored the Protectorate heroes huddled a ways away having a tense argument between themselves. It was impolite to stare at guests, Taylor reasoned, and also this might just be a regular occurrence in the future so she had better get used to it. Sunny sat near her, positively radiant from the attention.
"Choice of guests aside, Miko, you provide excellent entertainment." Lung hadn't moved from his spot, and sat watching the chaos. Oni Lee was taking his cue from Taylor, and just ignoring the whole mess. Sunny made sure to wander his way for a quick pet from the assassin, as well.
"...thank you, Lung." Taylor sighed. "Though, I really don't know what to do with this gift. I'm sure there's something, but— Sunny?"
As soon as she'd signed the last few forms, Sunny had come closer again, near vibrating with excitement. Taylor tucked the signed forms into the folder Battery had given her, with her copy of the alias registration forms. Most of the street now officially belonged to Brushstroke and Good Dog, or would as soon as Lung's check's cleared.
Sunny jumped to her paws with a bark, ran in one tight circle, then jumped up on Lung of all people and licked at his mask. Then she was off like a shot, barking excitedly and headed for the abandoned lot next door. Taylor glanced at her guests, who had all looked her way—even the heroes—then she looked after Sunny's path. At the distant sound of the wolf's Wooooo~! suddenly growing more echo-y, Taylor frowned and got up to follow. Footsteps behind her suggested that her guests had done the same.
"Sunny? Sunny, where'd you run to now?" Taylor pushed her way through a bit of overgrowth, and followed the dusty paw prints to… a hole? There was a hole dug in the middle of the abandoned lot, almost a pit really, measuring nearly a meter in diameter. A wooden crate had been shoved aside, presumably having been hiding the hole from casual view. Taylor edged a bit closer and peered down into it.
"That's… straight through the foundations," she heard Assault remark, behind her.
"Sunny… likes digging." Taylor said. "But this is pretty big. I wonder what she—"
Taylor cut off abruptly, a sudden rumble beneath the earth making her back up towards the line of heroes and villains behind her. Just in time, as another WOOOOOO~! heralded Sunny's return, as the canine shot out of the ground on top of a geyser. The wolf jumped off her latest improbability and, panting, jumped into the embrace of an old cement birdbath instead. The water she'd dug up rained back down, prompting a surprised cry from Taylor as the drops hit her skin and left steam.
"But that's— we're on an aquifer, the nearest fault line is a hundred miles away, how—" Whatever Armsmaster was saying, Taylor stopped listening, as several things all at once began to make sense. All those times she wandered off, only to come back covered in dirt, or mud, or concrete dust…
"Sunny," Taylor said, very calmly. "Did you… for months…" She had to take a breath. She heard Lung making a choking noise beside her, as the 'cratered' property values of the ABB territories steadily clicked upwards.
"Sunny, did you wipe out the Empire, dig a hundred miles or so of tunnels, and then manipulate Lung into buying up the street… SO YOU COULD OWN A HOT SPRING?!"
Sunny, lounging on her back in the birdbath, which was filling with steaming water from the mineral rain, tossed her head. Mmmmmbark.
There was a moment of silence, as Taylor processed this and everyone else quietly mourned the death of rationality.
"So I brought out some sake from Sunny's stash, does anyone want to—"
Lung had already turned around and taken three steps before she could finish. "Yes."