Chapter 25/Stephenie Meyer Owns Twilight.

Yep this is really late…but ya know Christmas and all…

Two Months Later… June 20th.

"Just lower it a little… talk in the back of your throat," Edward said softly, while his long white fingers gripped my neck, feeling my vocal chords.

Nodding in understanding, I straightened my shoulders to try again. "Like this?" I asked, making my words come from deep in my throat. I was trying to sound like I did as a human, but was failing miserably.

I looked to Edward hopefully, but his brow furrowed, shielding his amber eyes. "Lower," he instructed, sliding his hand slowly over my voice box, stopping to give me a patient smile. "Don't garble your words…just make your voice lower."

With a determined sigh I cleared my throat and lowered my chin, hoping that would help. "Like this?" I said again, realizing right away that the sound coming out of me was more like a weather girl in drag, generic and low, and less like a teenage girl. "Damn," I hissed.

Edward's once hopeful eyes fell to the tile floor of the bathroom and he dropped his hand from my neck. "Just tell her you have a cold," he said with a humph. "It's not even close love." Lifting my sagging chin, he brushed his knuckle over my cheek and gave me a sweet half smile, failing to mask his frustration. "You know you don't have to do this right? He asked, looking over my shoulder to the locked door, showing me the exit…

Edward's eagerness to scratch the plan frustrated me. He knew full well why we were locked in the bathroom, but seemed keen to leave. I on the other hand wasn't as easily defeated. I was going to call, I had to…"Yes I do," I snapped at him, grabbing the disposable cell phone from his hand. "It's your birthday, I have to call her."

My voice had prevented me from calling for months now. But this particular phone call, I just had to make. It obviously upset me that Edward didn't understand that, or that perhaps he no longer cared. Truth is he barely even breathed his mother's name anymore. At best he would mention her vaguely in passing, like an old classmate or brief acquaintance. But I thought of her constantly…wrote to her constantly, and agonized over how badly I would have to hurt her…constantly.

"I'm calling," I croaked, pressing my hand to the send button, having dialed the number over an hour prior… "My voice doesn't matter, I'm calling."

Ring…ring…ring…

There was a click on the other end…someone answered. Oh shit.

"Hello Masen residence, Liz speaking…"

Her voice sort of hit me like a swift punch in the gut, causing memories of my human life to wash over me and remind me of the world that I had left behind. Her voice was as familiar as anything I knew, yet somehow I had forgotten it. The rasp from years spent singing in the car and sneaking cigarettes from Ed. The soft way she went up an octave on her O's, showing her Midwestern upbringing…The underlying sadness that only a mother who lost her only child would have chasing her every word…

"Hello?" The familiar voice said again…"Hello is anybody there?"

I was frozen where I stood, holding the phone to my ear, listening to the voice on the other end, but not responding to it. It's funny, but in all of my preparation, I had never really figured out what I wanted to say. Or, if I had, I had forgotten…Because I had nothing…just dead air…

I looked to Edward, completely dumbstruck and helpless.

"Hello?"

Edward came toward me and grabbed my hand, urging me with his eyes to talk, telling me it was ok.

I took a deep breath, so nervous, yet so anxious to talk to her. "Hi Liz…it's me," I stuttered out in my garbled girly-man voice, low and raspy.

"Bella…Bella sweetheart is that you?"

"Yeah."

"Oh honey I've been so worried! Where the hell are you?! Why haven't you called?!"

"I'm fine," I whispered, feeling Edward's hand clamp down around mine abruptly. Reacting to the swift pain, I lifted my eyes, and found his. They were scrunched sort of like he was on the verge of crying, but obviously crying tears that would never come.

He looked completely stunned, and sad, and just as kicked in the gut as I was.

He was feeling it too…

I stepped slowly toward him and laid my head on his chest and waited while he carefully wrapped his arms around me. Feeling his arms, stiff and nervous, I lifted my hand and stroked his worried cheek lightly, giving him a small apologetic smile, fully understanding his heartrending expression.

Hearing his mother's voice, sensing her distress, her sadness, her pain…it hit him hard. And I was glad for that.

"Bella? Bella sweetheart are you there?" Liz cried from the other end, steering our attention back to the tiny phone in my hand.

I looked to Edward and he nodded, urging me to continue.

"Yeah I'm here," I whispered, nuzzling my face again into Edward's chest, holding the phone so he could hear it. He was grasping me tightly and his eyes were closed, just listening to his mother's voice.

"Bella are you alright honey, what's the matter? You sound sick."

"No, I'm fine, just bad reception, and…um allergies…"

Lie.

"What have you been doing? It's been almost four months and you haven't called…"

"I've been going to school."

Lie.

"And?"

"I've been writing a lot."

Lie.

"No, I mean how are you doing sweetheart? You never tell me in your letters. Are you coping alright? I've been so worried about you."

I didn't know what to say next. She thought I was in South America, completely alone, privately grieving the death of Edward, the love of my life who was tragically taken from me at 18. In reality, my forehead was pressed against his chest so closely that the warm honey of his scent was wafting into my nose and the smooth rhythmic purr of his breath was tickling my ear. I was with him, really with him, deliriously happy and loved. We were getting married in two days, and had spent the morning lying naked on river rocks and soaking in the coming summer sun, gorging ourselves on the blood of mountain lions…

Anything that could possibly come out of my mouth from that moment forward would not only be a lie, but a damaging lie. I would naturally want to lead her to believe that I was coping, healing, and getting closer to coming home…When the reality was that I was NEVER coming home, and anything I said to make her think that, would just do more harm than good. Leading my loved ones on, and making them think that I was on my way back was a mistake. No one ever wrote the book on how to handle this. Even Carlisle couldn't offer proper advice. Becoming a vampire had a completely unique set of circumstances.

Knowing what I had to do, I gripped tightly to Edward, wordlessly telling him of my next move. The stiff posture of his body told me that although torn and saddened by how fucked up it all was, he agreed with my decision. I lifted my chin slowly, and our eyes locked, surely matched in sadness.

"I'm sorry Liz, I can't do this," I whispered, feeling a familiar pain tear into my abdomen, impaled on the spot by a massive tree…"I…I have to go," I stuttered as I grabbed the throbbing gaping hole, trying to keep a steady voice.

Liz reacted exactly as I expected her to. "No Bella, don't hang up!" She screamed, all of the weakness in her voice instantly gone. She wasn't going to let me hang up without a fight, I knew that going in.

I didn't say anything, I couldn't, but I didn't hang up either…

"Damn it Bella talk to me!" Liz screamed again, causing my suddenly excruciating body to shake.

Edward pulled me to him tighter, panic in his eyes. "Hang up," he mouthed. "Hang up." He reached for the phone, but I pushed his hand away, realizing suddenly that I was not quite finished saying what I wanted to say.

What I wanted to say was still relevant. I had called for a reason after all. "I just wanted to call you on his birthday," I whimpered in my hunch. "I'm sorry…"

Then I heard a swift pounding noise come from the other end. I could picture Liz on the phone in the kitchen, slamming her fist into the refrigerator. "Don't Bella! Don't you dare hang up!"She cried, making me lose it. My knees went weak, and Edward held me up, gripping me to his body. "Let's just talk sweetie…Please?!" She was crying and gasping on the other end. "Please Bella?!"

I was listening to her whimpers, her cries, her agony, and feeling the indescribable pain in my own body…And then everything just became instantly crystal…So clear, it's impossible to imagine a time before I had my epiphany…

I had to let her go...

Like a light bulb going off in my head, or a lightning strike, it just hit me.

I had to let her go…

It would kill me. It would hurt. But it was right.

I had to let her go…

I looked to Edward one last time, showing him my fear, my trepidation. With a nod, his golden eyes folded closed and his parted mouth found my forehead, pulling me into a gentle embrace, filling me with the strength I needed to proceed.

I could let Liz go, I would let Liz go, and Edward was the reason. I never had a choice when it came to this. Edward Masen was the only choice I ever had. Everyone else would have to lose me, everyone else would have to suffer. Because no matter what, I couldn't live without him… And this was the sacrifice. Liz was the sacrifice.

"I love you Liz," I whispered slowly and clearly, making sure she heard me. "I'll always love you." I paused, finding it difficult to get out the last bit, but strengthened by the arms that held me. "Goodbye"

Then I was holding the phone in my hand like a dirty sock…not sure of what to do with it. I could say goodbye, but I couldn't be the one to hang up…I couldn't do it.

Through the receiver, we could hear Liz screaming... "Bella! Bella don't hang up! Bella!"

After too long, Edward stoically took the phone into his hand…Click…and folded it closed. "I'm proud of you," he whispered in a voice that I had never heard before. It was the voice of an adult, a man, not a boy. There was a newfound maturity behind his tone, like something in him had changed over the past two minutes. "You did the right thing," he continued, dropping a kiss on the top of my head and pushing back my shoulders, so he could see me, perhaps assess the damage.

The Hemlock through my heart hurt, but not nearly as much as it could have. Seeing Edward in front of me, feeling his long fingers cupping my shoulders, seeing him all perfect and strong and mine in the massive cabin bathroom, was the only sight I wanted to see in that moment. Imagining myself in Forks without him was so completely and totally impossible, I just knew instantly that saying goodbye to Liz was just the first step in a long process of goodbyes, of letting go, and of grieving…Because there was never another choice. Edward was always my only choice.

I smiled at him. "I'm so glad I chose you," I whispered, tripping forward, and landing my head once again into the comfort of his chest.

Edward's arms dropped my shoulders and wrapped tightly around my back, his mouth pressing into my cheek, just shy of my left eye. "Me too," was all he said. Not much more needed to be said. Our love for each other didn't really require a whole lot of explanation.

I looked to the door then, ready to exit. "Let's get out of here," I said, smiling, but it wasn't forced. "It's your birthday, and we are not spending it locked in this bathroom."

Edward's chest shook and the corners of his mouth pulled up. "Well," he said coyly, drawing his words out slowly. "We could hang out in the bathroom..." Then his eyes darted to the tub, mischievous and sly. "I mean, only if you want to," Edward offered, perhaps feeling a little brash wanting sex after what had just gone down.

But the thing was…I wanted to. It seemed inappropriate, and maybe a tad disrespectful, but somewhere deep down I knew that if Liz knew we were together, she would want us to be happy. I made my choice, I chose a life with Edward, and he wanted to have sex in the bathtub, and by God I was going to let him…

Without another word I jumped up, leaving my feet, and wrapped my ankles around Edward's waist, straddling him. My hands cradled the back of his neck, playful and light. "Show me a good time birthday boy," I laughed, letting him lead me to the tub, fully clothed.

Edward's smile grew even wider, seemingly contemplating a serious question. "Now," he said, dropping my back into the tub, kicking on the water. "Do you want to be thoroughly fucked by an eighteen year old, or a nineteen year old?" he laughed, unbuttoning my dress, causing my breast to pop out. Then his eyes got dark and hooded, as his mouth latched around my nipple. "This is a very important question Bella," he hummed, while his wet mouth teased my hard nipple, soaking me on the inside, as the hot water filled the tub, soaking me on the outside as well.

I lifted my warm wet hands from the water and ran them through Edward's thick bronze hair, holding him to me as his expert mouth traced the outline of my areola. Then I shifted my dripping bare knee, running it teasingly over the crotch of his jeans, pretending to mull over his question. "Ummmm," I said, moving my knee in slow circles teasing his already giant erection. "Nineteen," I purred, moving a hand to the fly of his jeans. "Definitely nineteen."

"Nineteen it is," Edward hissed as his fingers entered me, and I freed his erection from his pants, tugging on it firmly. "Brace yourself love, I'm older and more experienced…"

Then his thumb ghosted my clit…turning me to Jello.

"Nineteen is good," I hummed.

***

Edward's arm shifted, moving my floating chestnut hair, the warm bathwater almost pinkening his alabaster hands. It was most likely an illusion, but lying there naked with him, with my back pressing into his chest, and his long legs wrapped perfectly around mine in the warm water, almost made me feel human again.

"So, now that we did …that…Do you wanna talk about my mom?" Edward whispered into my ear, sliding his drifting hand over my hip, and settling it on my tummy.

I turned my head slightly and nuzzled into the crook of his neck, holding my hands behind my head and gripping his face, pulling him down for a kiss. He kissed me lightly for probably the hundredth time that day, but I needed it. I needed to enjoy my choice…Liz would have wanted it that way. "I'm good," I sighed, feeling strangely and uncharacteristically at peace with my decision. But Edward broached the topic, perhaps he wanted to talk? "Do you?" I asked, pressing my lips again to his. "Was it weird hearing her voice?"

Edward's head fell back onto the ledge of the tub. "Yeah maybe," he sighed. "I've been avoiding thinking about it I guess. But if it's alright with you, I think I want to talk about it?"

I turned over in the water, putting my knees onto the floor of the tub, and rested my chin on Edward's chest so I could look at him. "Of course baby," I sighed, lifting my hand to stroke his cheek. "But not while naked," I laughed, shifting to my feet and standing, reaching for Edward. "No talk of parent's while naked, we made that rule when we were fifteen remember?"

Edward reached for my hand and stood to meet me, showering water over me, and pulling me into a wet steamy hug. "Oh yes," Edward breathed with a smile. "Good rule."

***

"So she's been on medication?" Edward asked as we watched the sun fall over the mountain, purple and orange and green and spectacular.

"Yeah…we all were," I sighed as I reached for his hand and rolled toward him on the blanket. "Even Charlie."

"And she's drinking?"

"Bourbon."

"My dad?"

"Single malt…straight up."

"Oh."

Edward dropped my hand and sat up, gripping his knees and staring blankly at a fly that had been circling us most of the afternoon. "I was stupid to jump in their after Lauren Bella. I know that now."

"You saved her life."

"Yeah…"

I sat up and wrapped my arm over his shoulder, gripping him tightly with my fingers. "Hey," I said, nudging my head into the nook of his neck. "You're a hero."

"Yeah…"

"And I love you."

"I love you too."

"And the boy I love wouldn't have let her drown… Iknow that now."

Edward's body collapsed into me, letting me shoulder his weight. "You don't know how badly I needed to hear that," he cried, as his head fell into my lap. "Thank you Bella…thank you…"

"Shhh baby, shh…"

***

June 21st

"Ok, I realize this isn't exactly the best timing, but I have a surprise for you, a wedding gift of sorts," Edward said excitedly, pulling me running behind him through a remote forest we had yet to explore. It was farther south than any we had explored before, getting close to the main roads…

"We agreed…no gifts!" I cried in a laugh, completely clueless as to what awaited me, but strangely excited.

The previous day had been one of the most significant in our entire relationship, making me even more excited for our coming wedding. Edward and I were in a perfect place together, everything just aligning and working out. Wounds were healing and life was starting to become that blissful heaven that I dreamed of before we changed. The previous day was one of the best of my entire life, because Edward and I grew even closer, something I thought was impossible.

But as we ran, a strange feeling if trepidation came upon me for no explainable reason…it was just a feeling. And before long, my strange feeling was realized, as I saw a familiar flash of red peaking through the trees…and a foul odor waft into my nose…

I froze in my tracks, yanking Edward's hand, pulling his body abruptly backward. "Is that my truck?" I squeaked in a barely audible whisper; panic blurring my vision in ways I didn't realize were still possible.

But it was the odor…the odor!!

"Hey Bells!!" A familiar voice screeched joyfully as it came toward me. "Holy hell you look hot!!"

No!!

I turned to Edward, avoiding the form running toward me, hoping it would disappear. "What have you done?" I asked slowly, emphasizing every syllable.

Through the blur, I could see Edward's mouth pull into a smile. "Surprise!" He cried. "Jacob's here for the wedding!"

Silence…

"Bella? What's wrong?"

AN- Dun Dun Dun… Just when Bella thought it was safe to be happy…Jake shows up!! What the hell is he doing there? And why is Alice such a sucky psychic?! And who the hell has sex after talking to a grieving mother?

And if you're wondering…I'm cockblocking you all on purpose. I have this thing about wasting perfectly good lemons. I want to save mine…So hold tight, I have a few good ones planned.

Like this chapter? Lemme know. Didn't like this chapter? Lemme know…

You get the drift…please review.