All things Twilight belong to the awesome Stephenie Meyer, some plot points were inspired by V.C. Andrews and the rest comes from my strange mind. Happy Tuesday :)

Spiral

The dawn to end all nights
That's all we hoped it was
A break from the warfare in your house
To each his own
The High Road by Broken Bells

I thought having everyone together would smooth things out. I figured everyone acting normal, or as close to normal as they could be, would make things better, but it didn't. Even Leah couldn't help shed a light on the situation, because in all honesty we were all together. The only thing she did notice, or at least speculate, was that Alice was acting strange and she believed it was because she had a crush on Jasper.

I knew she was right.

Before leaving, Leah had made me swear to keep her updated on the situation and also made me promise to come home for Thanksgiving.

I had agreed to both but hadn't spoken to anyone about Thanksgiving yet. I didn't even know how this family did that. Did they spend it together like most other families? Mamére had always had me spend it with her and the Clearwater's because she believed in spending time with the people you loved and were thankful for, and I had been happy to, because there was nowhere else I would rather be.

Now, I was torn.

I wanted to spend the holiday with Carlisle and Emmett, and all of my friends, but I also wanted to go home to my family—the people who kept me grounded and loved me unconditionally.

Having two worlds to live in was exhausting, and if it hadn't been for Leah integrating so easily into my life here, I would have given up a long time ago. It wasn't because of my friends; they were amazing and had accepted me easily and with open arms. It wasn't even necessarily my family because Emmett and Carlisle seemed genuinely happy to have me there. Peter, for all his odd behavior and sick relationship with Izzy, didn't make me feel unwelcome either. If I had to give a reason, it was simply that I was homesick. The world here was a different place. Fast paced and scary as hell. Maybe a trip home was exactly what I needed.

I had been going back and forth like this all week. Leah had left early on Sunday morning, leaving me with too much time on my hands again. I didn't want to call Jasper because I didn't want him and Alice to feel weird around me. Emmett was with Edward again, and Rosalie was out shopping with her mom.

Five days later, we were back in this odd dance again. Alice was still avoiding Jasper and practically ran from him in the corridors, and Emmett and Edward were scarce. Emmett at least sat with us at lunch again, but much like Jasper, he sat at the other end of the table with Ben and Peter, who looked a little perplexed at all the attention. Edward didn't even bother; he ended up at the pool most days.

Rosalie was frustrated too by Thursday afternoon. She sat at the table with her chin in her hands, watching as the boys at the end of the table laughed and talked amongst themselves.

"What the hell am I doing wrong?" she sighed, leaning into me and putting her head on my shoulder. "I asked him if he wanted to hang out this weekend, and he told me they were going to the LSU game—which is fine. I just thought maybe he would invite us again."

"Why don't you just tell him how you feel?" I asked. "This dancing around the subject is making you miserable."

"I can't, Bella. I mean I want to try and have a relationship with the guy, but I'm not the first move kinda girl, and this whole thing with Edward just makes it all the more confusing. I mean, was he just saying that to be nice? Did he say something different to Emmett? I can't tell him how I feel because I'm terrified of his rejection."

She sat up, her head leaving my shoulder as she gave off an elongated sigh. I could understand her fear. She was one of the most confident people I knew, but under that exterior, I knew there had to be an inkling of self-doubt. It just so happened Emmett was the reason behind it at the moment.

"Hey y'all," Alice sang, sliding into her seat next to Rosalie. Her eyes flashed to Jasper before looking down at her food as she did everyday.

Since Leah's observation on Saturday, I had been noticing small things like that more and more. I hated the thought that her misery stemmed from her loyalty to me. Maybe it was time to set the record straight with her. Maybe honesty was the best policy so we could all get out of this funk and move on and regain some normalcy.

"Hey Al?" I asked, leaning forward so I could see her past Rosalie. "Do you want to come hang out at my house this weekend? You too, Rose."

"Really? That would be awesome. I have been home every night this week," Alice said, smiling. I'd assumed she was at least hanging out with Jasper in the evening, but apparently her avoidance involved all forms of communication. I gave her a smile and a nod and bumped shoulders with Rosalie.

"How about you?"

"Sorry, made plans with my cousin," she sighed, her hands slapping on the table as she pushed out her chair. "I have to go talk to a teacher about a stupid pop quiz I missed. I'll see you guys later."

"Bye Rose, see you in class."

Alice and I watched her walk away in silence, when she was gone Alice slid into her now vacant chair.

"What was that all about?"

"Just a bad week," I sighed, pushing the fries around my plate. "We all have them."

We talked about our plans for the weekend while we ate. Alice never looked up from her food unless it was to talk to me, and I was beginning to feel as though I had made the right choice the more we spent time together. Alice was such a free spirit; she was spirited and happy most of the time, so seeing her like this was making me miserable.

I had no idea what I was going to say to her, or even how I would bring the subject up, which at least gave me something to do while I locked myself in my room that night. I was hoping Leah would have some words of wisdom. Unfortunately, her phone went to voicemail, which meant one of two things, and I wasn't willing to dissect that right now.

By the time the end of school rolled around on Friday, I had managed to work myself up into a huge mess. I had gone so far in the preparation I had moved on to freaking myself out about it all. It was ridiculous. I knew that, just as much as Leah would have if she could see the mess I'd worked myself into, but I couldn't help my trepidation. The last thing I wanted was to offend Alice. She was one of my closest friends.

Thankfully though, it turned out my anxiety had been pointless.

We were sitting in my room watching movies; both of us shared the same pillow in the middle of the couch, our bodies sprawled out on opposite sides. There was a huge bowl of popcorn on the floor that both of us would sporadically grab a handful of.

I had been working myself up to my speech all day and now I felt ridiculous. Alice really didn't need a speech, I just had to talk to her, or at least get her talking. We were friends, so I needed to start acting like one.

"Hey Al, can I ask you something?"

"Sure," she answered, rolling onto her stomach so she could see me, her ankles crossing. She looked down at me expectantly, her eyes smiling with her amusement.

"What's going on with you and Jasper?"

"What?" There went the smile. I could literally see the panic behind her eyes as she tried to find an answer. Then her answer tumbled out all in one long breath. "Nothing, I don't even hang out with him anymore nothing's going on why would you think something's going on?"

I rolled over onto my stomach so I could see her face; she looked like she was about to start crying.

"Alice, I didn't mean it like that," I laughed, picking up her hand. "I mean you two were close; now all of a sudden you're avoiding one another."

Alice's eyes pooled with unshed tears. Her eyes were wide and apologetic; whatever was going on had been plaguing her. I could see it in her red-rimmed eyes and the way her teeth worried her bottom lip. I wanted to hug her, but I also wanted her to open up.

"I am such a horrible friend. I suck, and believe me, I hate myself more than you ever could."

"Alice, chill out. What the hell are you talking about?"

"The last time Jasper and I hung out, alone—God it's been two weeks now, but I feel horrible. I know that the two of you are, well, I don't know what you are, but I know that you're at least seeing him in some capacity. I never meant for it to happen I swear it."

"Still not following you, Al." I smiled gently, squeezing her hand.

"I almost kissed Jasper. Well, I didn't, we just kind of moved in at the same time then stopped. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. I'm sorry, I knew I should have stayed away from him when I realized how attracted I was to him . . . Oh Jesus."

Considering I had figured out the truth after Leah's prompts, this was almost amusing to me. I felt bad for giggling at her when she was pouring out her woes, but it seemed oddly humorous to me. If I thought about it, they made the perfect couple. Yet both respected me so much they fought what they felt and pushed it aside. I had never been in love with Jasper. Our attraction to one another had been based purely on our friendship and both of us had known that from the start. We'd even talked about it. Yet he still fought not to act on his attraction to Alice. I loved them both for that.

"What the hell is so funny?" she screeched, her tears now spilling over her lids and leaving big wet tracks across her porcelain cheeks.

"Alice, Jasper and I were never dating. We, in no uncertain terms, said that we would enjoy one another's company until it didn't work for us anymore. I love him, but I'm not in love with him. I love you both for thinking of me like that, but really, all this heartbreak is for nothing."

"You're not mad?"

"No, why would I be? Alice we're friends, you and me, and Jasper and me. Friends. If you and Jasper are feeling more you should go for it. Jasper is an amazing guy; I think the two of you would be great together."

"God, you're so weird," Alice wailed, burying her head into the pillow.

"I don't know whether I should be offended by that," I laughed, sitting up and pulling my legs under me. I hated that she was crying, that she still felt so bad about all of this while I felt almost liberated. Knowing the truth, all of it made me feel so much better. I loved spending time with Jasper—I would miss making out with him when the opportunity presented itself, but I would rather him and Alice be happy. It had never been a permanent thing, and I could honestly say that it didn't bother me. Especially after having all week to get used to the idea.

"You think I didn't notice?" I asked, my voice a softer tone this time.

Alice looked up at me with her eyes red and puffy, sniveling as she tried to read my expression. "What do you mean?"

"Al, since the day you arrived the two of you have been inseparable, then all of a sudden you're not talking to him, you won't sit by him, you avoid one another unless forced into a social situation. I hate seeing that, and I hate the thought that I am making the two of you miserable. You two have a chemistry with one another, and I'm not going to stand in the way of that."

Alice's wide eyes now suited her gaping mouth. I still didn't quite understand why she was so surprised; I would have thought Jasper would have explained it to her. Not to mention their very obvious attraction to one another. It wasn't until Leah pointed it out that I could see what I had missed all that time, but it had been there since the beginning.

"Bella, you don't understand. He loves you; I can see it when he looks at you. I can't let you break his heart."

"Alice," I sighed, and pulled her into me so I could hug her. "Let me talk to him, just me and him and I won't mention this talk I promise. I'll approach him the same way I did you and get to the bottom of this, k?"

She shook her head in my shoulder, telling me no, but my stubborn side had already made up its mind and there was no stopping me. Jasper and I had talked about this, we'd made our decisions, and he'd even made an effort to keep my virtue intact because he knew it wasn't a permanent thing. I could tell Alice that, but right now I wasn't sure it would help her in this frame of mind because I was sure I would have to go into further detail and that really wasn't something she needed to know.

"Do you feel better at least?" I asked, sitting back and catching her eyes.

"I do, at least the truth's out there. I was so worried you would hate me, Bella."

"Why would I hate you? I thought Jasper would have explained our relationship to you."

"He did, but if you could just see the way he talks about you. And then when we almost kissed, he looked horrified, like . . . I don't know. But it was horrible."

"You probably caught him off guard. And I don't mean in the kissing sense," I finished when she moved to correct me. "When I say that, I mean he probably didn't expect to feel attracted to you. Jasper acts like a flirt but he's really a monogamous kind of guy I think."

"And he loves you."

I wasn't sure how to make her understand. Nothing had really changed since Jasper and I had had the conversation before my birthday party. In fact, we hadn't made out in forever. If I had to pinpoint a time that it had happened it was after our evening together. I knew Jasper loved me, he was one of my best friends, but much the same as I knew I wasn't in love with him, I knew he wasn't in love with me.

"He doesn't. He's one of my best friends, Alice, but we're not in love."

"It doesn't matter, Bella. Neither one of us will act on anything; we both love you and respect you. It was a stupid mistake and I just have to get over my stupid crush on him."

Now we were talking in circles. It was pointless trying to change her mind without talking to Jasper. So I waited. Saturday I spent the day with Alice and finally got her laughing. We watched movies again that night and just had fun together, neither of us mentioning our conversation the previous night.

Alice was an amazing person to be around. She could make hours disappear and talk about anything. I was envious of her in some ways. Her parents let her choose her own style and she more often than not wore band tees and jeans with Chuck Taylor's. Being one of the shortest people I knew, I almost expected her to be the girlie-girl that wore heels and make up, but she wasn't. She was just Alice.

The moment she left on Sunday morning, I did two things. The first was to call Leah and tell her what a smart-ass know-it-all she was. The second was to call Jasper and see if he was free to hang out.

He was.

"Hey sexy." He grinned, meeting me at the front door before taking me up to his room. He waved off his parents as I entered, but I smiled and waved anyway. I had spoken to Mrs. Whitlock before and she was always so welcoming with me. I enjoyed our chats the days I got here too early and had to wait for Jasper to get home.

We got to his bedroom and fell on his bed at the same time—me sitting up, and him on his back. He tugged on my shirt and pulled me back so I was lying beside him. We both looked at one another for a long while, neither of us moving or saying a word.

"Jazz, what happened between you and Alice?" I started, knowing that I couldn't say that I had already spoken to Alice. I figured it had worked with her. Maybe it would work with him too.

"What do you mean?"

I raised my eyebrows. He was so much more cautious than Alice had been. I could see that guilt behind his eyes but they were guarded, the blue coming down heavily to block the emotion before I could read too much into it. I pushed the blond strands back from his forehead with the hand closest to him and grinned.

"You like her don't you?"

"Bella," he sighed, his hand catching mine and pulling it to his chest where I could feel the hammering of his heart.

"Jazz, why are you doing this to yourself? We talked about this. We said that if someone came along we were interested in we'd just go back to being friends."

"Would you believe me if I told you I was a greedy bastard and wanted you all to myself?" I would have laughed but I could see the seriousness create a protective barrier between us. I had never seen him like this before; he was always the joker, the smiler that fought to make things easier. Now here he was, vulnerable and a little defensive.

"What the hell are you talking about, Jasper?" I asked, rolling onto my side and propping my head up with my hand.

"You have no idea how much you mean to me, do you?" he said, turning his head to look at me. "I do like Alice, Bella. There's something about that girl that I can't stop thinking about, but I'm torn apart because I can't let you go. I don't know if I can unblur the line between us. You're probably more my best friend than Peter has ever been. You understand me, I don't want to lose that."

"You're not going to, Jazz. I will always be there for you. I will always be your friend; we're just eighty-sixing the kissing and the touchy-feely. Nothing's really gonna change. I will still love you without being in love with you."

"But what if I want to grab your boob?" he asked, the serious veneer of his face cracking and allowing the smile to shine through.

"You're a sick puppy," I snorted, covering my face with my palm to cover the sound. "Why would you want to touch my boobs when you'll have a girlfriend, whose boobs will be at you beck and call?"

"Bella, I can't date Alice."

"Why not?" I asked confused, my brows furrowed but relaxed when his thumb ran over them.

"Because it will hurt you. If it was anyone else, someone outside the group, I could probably do it because I wouldn't feel as though I was rubbing it in your face, but we're all so close. My fear of hurting you wouldn't make a great relationship, and I'm pretty sure I could say the same for Alice. She loves you."

"Jazz, I'm not going to stand between you and Alice. You like her, she likes you, and I think it may be weird at first, but not a bad weird where I will avoid you. It'll just take a little getting used to. The sooner you jump in there, the sooner the awkward will go away."

"No, Bella," he said softly as he turned his head to look at the ceiling of his room.

"You're a stubborn ass, Jasper Whitlock."

"You're a selfless seductress, Isabella Swan," he said, turning to look at me again and winking.

"That was a contradiction. But you should know I won't be letting this drop. What if I decided I was in love with Ben?" I asked, my mind not picturing the dark haired boy with glasses. My mind formed a perfect picture of Edward Masen instead, but I would never say that out loud. "Would you expect me to just ignore how I felt? You call me selfless, but you're being self sacrificing to the point of idiocy. You being with Alice would make me happy because I think I know how you feel about each other. I saw it before you stopped talking to each other, I just didn't pay attention."

"I think I would be jealous if you were in love with Ben. Did he ask you out?" Jasper asked, feigning concern.

"Shut up, you know what I'm saying," I giggled, slapping his stomach with my hand. "I'm making a point and I am asking you to be considerate of that and really think about what you want. You know my feelings on this now. You know that you have not only my hopes but my encouragement as well."

"Let's just see how everything plays out."

"Of course you would say that," I laughed, pushing him with my free hand. "Always so non-committal."

"Knock knock," a voice said from the door, drawing our attention to it. Edward was leaning against the door jam, his eyes guarded and hands behind his back, his hair still the perfect copper mess it always was. I fought back the blush as the thoughts ran through my head.

Ever since the Halloween party, I had been daydreaming about him whenever we simply crossed paths. His emerald eyes were always so intense as he gazed at me, his long fingers running through the mess atop his head as his lips rose slowly to smile at me. It was like watching a movie when everything goes to slow motion. I felt ridiculous.

"I came to get my wallet. I left it here last night."

"Oh shit, you left it in the pool house, right?" Jasper said, sitting up, his body extending further so he was stood. "I'll be right back."

I watched him slide past Edward and disappear down the hall, his footsteps fading with each step. Feeling a little uncomfortable, I sat up and pulled my legs under me, my eyes constantly straying to Edward. I didn't even know what to say to him. How was it possible I could think about him so much?

"I didn't mean to interrupt," he said, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed.

"Oh you didn't," I smiled, trying to swallow the word vomit before it escaped. Too late apparently. "I was just trying to convince Jasper to date Alice."

Edward's eyebrow rose on his forehead in surprise. He pushed off and took a few steps forward, his eyes still guarded as though he were trying to put something together. "Aren't you and Jasper seeing one another?"

"No, just friends, well, more complicated than that but I think we've grown out of the complicated part." I snapped my mouth shut, feeling like an idiot. I needed to shut up. I kept talking and making absolutely no sense whatsoever.

"It's really none of my business. I'm sorry if I made you feel awkward."

"No it's really no big deal."

"You coming to the swim meet next week?" he asked, fiddling with something on Jasper's desk, his eyes not meeting mine.

"When is it?" I asked, trying to sound cool while not falling over myself to confirm my attendance. I was being ridiculous again, but I couldn't seem to help myself.

"Wednesday after school."

"Probably, is the team any good?" I asked, smirking.

Edward chuckled but looked at me this time. His lips were curled into his lopsided grin. "Depends if we have the right audience."

My smirk turned into a full-blown smile as I flipped my hair over my shoulder. I knew we were flirting again but there was nothing I could do to stop it. It was like the most natural thing in the world for me. I couldn't deny my attraction for him now. The daydreams had been bad, but the way my heart reacted to certain looks or mannerisms of his, I knew that I was hopeless. There was just nothing I could do about it.

"Hmm," I hummed. "I may have to check out this team one afternoon at their practices. I wouldn't want to embarrass myself."

"See you on Monday then," he challenged, his green eyes sparkling playfully.

I smiled and nodded. Before I could retaliate, Jasper came back into the room and handed Edward his wallet.

"Thanks, man. See you both tomorrow."

"Bye, Ed."

"Bye, Edward."

He gave us both a wave without looking back and shut the door behind him. Jasper fell onto the bed next to me and pulled me down so my head was resting against his chest. "Now, where were we?"

"I was convincing you to start dating Alice."

"You don't give up do you?"

"No sir, not when it's something I know I'm right about."

I could hear his eyes roll at me, even if I couldn't see them. He knew I was right and he knew it made sense. I knew what I was doing; I knew that the little green monster would rear its ugly head, but I wouldn't hold it against them, and they would never know about it.

Jasper and Alice would make a cute couple, there was no doubt about it, and I knew that if they gave themselves a chance, they could work well. I'd seen them together before the sexual tension had pushed them to almost kiss. I just hoped they wouldn't hold back because of me.

A/N: It seems we may have more Edward in a Speedo yet! Bella needed to clear the air with these two and I hope it wasn't super boring, although I really couldn't resist having her and Jasper have one last cuddle :)

Thank you to my awesome beta, Annabanana, who fixes my grammar and punctuation and makes my writing better. She's awesome!

Thanks as always to my girls, Miztrezboo, Bendingmirrors, Hev99 and Newmoonaholic, for holding my hand and slapping sense into me when necessary.

I would also like to thank all of you for reading and reviewing. You're all amazing and every week I love hearing about what you think is going on and your guesses for the future and the great divide between Edward and Jasper lol. You keep me smiling and inspired and for that I love you all!

Much love and huge hugz ~Weezy~