Author's Note: This chapter is so long. But I didn't feel that I could cut it, so you get it completely uncut. Gosh, I might need an editor… Where's Gordon Lish when you need him?
This chapter pretty heavily references Trigun Maximum Volume 12. If you haven't read the manga… Hopefully I hinted enough at what happened that you get it anyway? Let me know if more clarification is necessary.
The End
a Trigun fanfiction
XIX. HOMECOMING
GREAT MELCA BORDER SAND OCEAN. AF0155-06-02. 12:06 PM.
When they stopped the car next to the small house on the edge of the sand ocean, it looked like nothing had changed. Vash stepped out to scan the mist. It was still as thick as ever, but he could see the cable stretching from the house somewhere across the ocean, which meant the gravity Plant was still functioning well.
"Whoa," said Livio, walking over to stand beside Vash. "What is this?"
"Home."
Livio raised an eyebrow. "You live in a sand storm?"
Vash shot him a look. "No! It's mist. The gravity Plant keeps the ship floating inside it."
Livio blinked. "Uh-huh."
"We haven't seen Miss Luida and the others for a long time," said Millie, smiling excitedly.
Vash grinned at her. "Yeah, me neither."
"That's your own fault," said Meryl, hotly. "You could have come here a lot earlier, if you weren't running around doing… whatever you've been doing."
Vash pouted. That was rather unfair of her. "I've been busy," he whined.
Meryl rubbed her temples. "Busy with what?"
"Running for my life," he muttered, starting toward the house. He stopped, hesitated, and then turned back around.
"Uh… Maybe you guys should stay here," he said to Livio, Knives, and Chronica. He gave Livio a meaningful look, and Livio seemed to understand.
"Sure," he said. "How long will you be?"
"Not long. Just gotta make sure they're ready for… us."
Meryl and Millie lead the way through the house and climbed into the cable car first. Vash turned to look back through the house's windows. The back of the car was open, and Livio was sitting on the edge, relaxing. Chronica was still in the front seat, but Knives was leaning against the car, looking at the house, his arms crossed. They hadn't talked about what had happened. If they hadn't been in the same small space for the last two days, Vash would have avoided him.
His talk with Livio had helped a little. He might be right about finding a reason. After all, Knives didn't seem interested in destroying the human race anymore. But it was still hard to see him kill anyone, especially after everything they'd been through. With Wolfwood, it was a little different. Wolfwood wasn't his brother, and he hadn't killed thousands of people in one fell swoop without remorse. But when it was Knives killing – Knives, who he had grown up with and who had played with Rem and who had seemed so happy and who had actually looked forward to meeting humans – it was more difficult to stomach. He'd seen Knives change into a stranger, and just when Vash thought they were getting closer to what they had before, he saw the stranger in his brother again.
"Mr. Vash?"
Vash turned around. Meryl and Millie were waiting in the cable car, watching him curiously. He smiled and walked inside.
"Sorry, let's go."
He glanced back once more. Knives was still watching them go.
I'll be right back, he said, but that wasn't what he meant to say at all.
They rode the cable car through the mist, and when the SEEDS ship appeared, Millie let out a squeal, and even Meryl couldn't contain her excitement. They both jumped to the other side of the car, rocking it with the sudden movement. Vash clung to the side, opposite them, but it didn't take them much longer to reach the platform.
Vash stepped out first and held the car steady so the girls could disembark, then led them down to the main gate. Luida, Brad, and Lenford were already waiting for them (a signal went off whenever the cable car was activated), and when Vash saw them, he grinned easily.
"I'm home," he called.
Luida smiled, a single eyebrow raised. "Yes. Welcome home. It has been a while."
Vash rubbed the back of his neck as they approached. "Yeah. Sorry about that. I guess I got sidetracked."
Brad grunted in disbelief, but Luida shook her head. "We're just glad you're well." She turned to Meryl and Millie. "And it's good to see you two again."
"Yes!" chirped Millie. "It's been a long time."
"Well, come in," said Luida, turning toward the doors.
"Um, actually," said Vash, stopping her, and when she turned around, he found that he wasn't quite sure how to explain. "Um… We left a few others at the car, so we – um…"
Luida nodded. "Yes. Go get them. We have a few rooms prepared already. How many are you?"
"Six," he said, then shook his head. "But – well, there's Livio – "
"Oh, great," said Brad, smirking. "I haven't seen that bastard in ages."
Vash laughed nervously. "Right."
"Who are the others?" asked Lenford.
Vash glanced at Meryl, who just raised an eyebrow at him.
"Well… One of them is my sister."
Now Luida raised both of her eyebrows. "Really? Another Independent?"
"Right," he said. "She came down with the Earth Federation. She was in the battle at Octovern, but she's been with us for a while now."
Luida looked at him thoughtfully. "Well, it should be interesting to meet her," she said at last. "A female Independent. And you don't need to worry," she added, in response to Vash's anxiety. "She may have been a danger once before, but so have many of your friends. You have always been a great judge of character, so we trust you to do what is right."
Vash laughed shakily. "Well, I'm glad you said that. 'Cause… um… You see…" He took a deep breath and dove in. "Knives is alive."
Luida stared at him with wide eyes. Lenford looked stricken.
"You brought him here?" shouted Brad.
Vash raised his hands defensively. "He's fine now! …Sort of," he mumbled.
"What does 'fine' mean?" asked Lenford, suspiciously.
"Uhh…"
"What does 'sort of' mean?" Brad demanded in turn.
"He took care of Mr. Vash when he was hurt, and he hasn't said anything mean to me at all," said Millie cheerfully, and Vash wanted to throw his arms around her and cry with gratitude.
Brad stared at her. "Do we know the same homicidal maniac?"
"Well, you've never really met him, have you?" said Meryl. "So, no, probably not. But we're talking about the same person. He's rude and cold, but…" She paused and shrugged. "He's not dangerous. Not to us, anyway." She rounded on Vash suddenly. "Well?" she demanded. "Don't think we're going to keep defending him by ourselves. He did try to kill all of us, after all."
"It was nothing personal," said Vash, but that was a weak defense. "Um, but," he said, turning back to Luida, "we're trying. To rebuild." Trying being the operative word… No success to speak of yet.
Luida gave him a hard look, but she thought about it. "All right," she said at last. "Bring them all up. We will trust you on this." She gave him a significant look, arched eyebrows raised, and he understood.
He left the girls with Luida and rode the cable car back across the canyon, thinking and trying not to think. He hadn't really prepared for this. He had hardly thought about it at all, and now that they were here…
The cable car reached the other side, and Vash walked across the house, but when he reached the door, he hesitated. How was this going to work?
With a deep breath, he opened the door. The other half of his party was sitting in the back bed of the car. Livio had managed to get Vash's siblings to play a card game, and when he saw Vash standing in the doorway, he dropped his cards and hurried over.
"Thank God," said Livio, sighing in relief. "Do you know how difficult it is to keep those two entertained when all they want to do is kill each other?"
Vash glanced at Knives and Chronica, who were debating something under their breaths, and then Knives reached over and turned Livio's cards over. Chronica looked displeased.
"I can't imagine," said Vash with a laugh, as they headed back over to the car. "Thanks for watching them."
"That's me," muttered Livio. "Babysitter of the Plants."
Vash laughed again, and Chronica stood up. Vash reached past Knives to grab his duffel. "Let's go."
Livio and Chronica grabbed the rest of the packs, and Knives slid out wordlessly, his own pack in hand. They boarded the cable car, and when they reached the other side and started toward the stairs, Vash reached out and grabbed Knives's arm. Knives yanked back in surprise, but didn't break his grip.
"Hey, um," Vash began. Livio and Chronica were already halfway down the stairs. Luida waited near the doors and glanced up. Vash looked away.
"I need to…" he began again, and faltered. "I want to apologize for what happened. That night."
Knives said nothing, and Vash slowly released his arm.
"I think we keep falling into the same pattern," he said. "We can't keep doing that."
"I was just trying to…" But Knives didn't go on.
"We need to figure out another way to do this," said Vash, after a long pause. "I know you were scared." He ignored the indignant frown that twisted Knives's mouth when he said this and continued. "But I was scared, too. We all were. And then… you scared me, too.
"But I still shouldn't have pointed a gun at your head. That's part of that old pattern, and I'm sorry."
Knives didn't reply for a long time, staring at the ground. Finally, he nodded and sighed.
"I'm sorry, too," he said. "For what I said."
"But not what you did?"
"I stand by my choice."
Vash frowned and wondered what kind of choice Knives thought that was, but then he remembered something Knives had said that night in the desert.
To protect you.
Vash froze. He had never considered that before. Knives had done it to protect him. Like Wolfwood had, with Raidei. He hated that. He hated the thought that in order to protect him, others felt the need to kill. But then… to save Livio, Vash had…
Vash shook himself. Livio was right. Knives had to find his own reasons. And they would have to figure out how to protect each other in a different way.
Knives took a step past him, to start down the stairs, but Vash stopped him again.
"Knives, this is my home."
Knives paused. "I know," he murmured.
"These people… They're…" He faltered again. He knew Knives was uncomfortable around so many people. He remembered feeling the same way, a long time ago.
"That night," he said softly, "when Rem found us in the lab… I told her I couldn't stand living on a ship filled with so many humans. She said that they would be there forever. I didn't understand what she meant then." He looked down to where Luida and the others were waiting for them.
"You're not alone anymore, Knives," he continued. "Those people… Maybe humans have made mistakes, but you have to find people you can trust. There will always be people there for you."
Finally, Knives met his eyes, and it struck Vash how tired he looked. "There's no escape from this, is there?"
Vash chuckled. "I've gotta get my arm patched up somewhere." He stepped past Knives and led the way down to the platform.
The others were discussing something, but when Vash and Knives reached the bottom of the stairs, they stopped. Luida walked forward, and Chronica followed to stand next to Vash.
"Luida, this is Chronica," said Vash, "my sister."
Luida held out her hand and Chronica took it.
"Pleased to meet you," said Luida. "We hope to hear much about your travels."
"Yes," said Chronica. She looked up. "Your ship is in surprisingly good condition," she added. "Not like the other ships on this planet."
"Yes, well, most of them were destroyed in the Great Fall," said Luida pleasantly. With this, she turned to Knives.
Vash took a deep breath. "Luida, this is my brother Knives. Knives, this is Luida. She's the president of the ship."
"Thank you for the introduction, Vash," said Luida. She studied at Knives for a moment, and then held out her hand. Brad and Lenford stiffened behind her, and Vash grinned nervously and glanced at Knives. Knives returned the glance and then looked at Luida's hand. Finally, he reached out and took it stiffly.
"We meet at last, Millions Knives," said Luida.
"Right," muttered Knives. "Nice to… meet you."
When Luida released his hand, Vash felt Knives's relief wash over him, and he almost laughed. She stepped back and indicated the men behind her.
"This is Brad, and Lenford," she said, addressing Knives and Chronica. She turned to Vash. "We haven't announced your arrival to everyone, because I'm sure you'll want to rest – but as it's a secret, naturally, the whole city knows." She smiled, and Vash returned it.
Luida turned and led them through the doors and onto the grassy expanse that filled the outer city. The wind from outside ruffled the soft grass beneath their feet until Lenford closed the doors behind them. The city looked exactly as it always had: the grass stretching out to meet the steps of the buildings, the imitation sky glowing bright blue on the walls. Only the absence of people was jarring.
"We moved everyone into the inner apartments," Luida explained over her shoulder as she walked further into the city.
Vash glanced at Knives and found that his brother wasn't by his side anymore. He spun around, his heart pounding, and found Knives lingering by the door and staring out at the city. He had never seen a ship altered like this one, Vash realized.
"They remodeled," said Vash.
Knives's gaze snapped from the blue ceiling to Vash. "It's… different."
Vash smiled, and suddenly he felt a mental tug from Chronica. The others had gotten quite a bit ahead of them.
"Come on," said Vash, and Knives took a tentative step into the city. They walked quickly to catch up to Luida and the others.
"If you'll follow me this way, I can show you to your lodgings," Luida was saying. "We only have a few suites available in the main area, where I'm sure—"
"VAAAAAASH!"
The cry had come from somewhere behind them, and Vash recognized the voice with some dread. Luida was right; everyone knew he was here already. It made him smile, that they were still happy to see him, after everything that had happened, after everything he had put them through. It was good to be home.
He expected to feel the impact any moment now, and he started to turn a little so he could see how soon it would come and prepare himself.
It came sooner than he expected, but he never felt anything. Instead he saw, out of the corner of his eye, Knives suddenly lurch forward, and the next thing he knew, Knives was bent over, glaring at his attacker.
"What?" said Meryl, shocked, and Vash realized it must have happened to quickly for the human eye to see. Knives's attacker had jumped on his back, but he had immediately reached up, grabbed her shoulders, and thrown her over his head.
Knives's attacker, stunned, stared back up at Knives, who had frozen above her. Slowly, her lips peeled back into a wide grin.
"Vash!" cried Jessica, reaching up to grab Knives around the neck, but Knives was too fast for her, and he ducked away, releasing his grip on her shoulders. Jessica fell backwards with a thud and Vash winced, but she managed to avoid hitting her head. She turned around on the floor quickly to glare at him, but her expression changed from annoyance to confusion immediately, and her eyes flicked between Vash and Knives.
Vash leaned down. "Hi, Jessica. This is my brother, Knives."
Livio burst out laughing. Jessica's brow furrowed, her eyes still going back and forth, and Vash grinned uncertainly. Had Knives broken her?
"I didn't break her," protested Knives from behind Vash. Vash looked over his shoulder. Knives crossed his arms, and Vash had to suppress the thought that Knives was using him as a shield.
"For your information," Knives continued with a sneer, "I held back."
"Yeah," said Livio with a laugh, "he could have sliced her in half."
"Not anymore," reminded Chronica. Knives glowered at her.
"Thank you, Knives, for holding back," said Luida, interrupting their jests on Knives, and Vash would have to thank her later for doing so. It wouldn't do to have a fight break out right when they arrived.
Vash watched Knives carefully, but his brother only shrugged and looked away. It occurred to Vash that, in spite of what he tended to think about Knives, Knives did know how to maintain self-control. They were lucky Knives had only thrown her on the ground; he could have thrown her across the room. Through the ship walls, probably.
Jessica, finally discerning which one was the real Vash (maybe they needed haircuts?), flung herself onto him.
"Vash!" she cried again, ecstatic.
He patted her back awkwardly. "Hi, Jess." He tried to peel her off, but she was stuck tight to him, like a human-shaped piece of tar.
What the actual fuck? Knives's voice rang clear and vexed.
Vash rolled his eyes. He glanced at Brad, who was glaring at him, and grinned uncertainly. He managed to step away from Jessica successfully and she didn't throw herself on him again. "So," he said, "who can I see about this arm?"
"That'd be me, I guess," said Brad, dropping the glare to grin. "Kain and me have been working on a new model."
After parting from Brad, Jessica, and Lenford, Luida showed them to their rooms, which were spread out among several buildings, due to space constraints in the central quarter. She offered to place them further away from the rest of the citizens, but they all decided it was less convenient that way. So Meryl and Millie had a small suite together, with Chronica across the street and Livio just a few buildings away.
Once they dropped off their bags, Luida led the rest of the way to Vash's suite, where he and Knives would stay. He already knew where it was, because he stayed there every time he came home, but when she opened the door, he found that they had changed it. There was an extra bed—for which Vash was grateful, because Knives kicked in his sleep—and the front room had more seating space than he remembered, with a long sofa and three chairs.
He threw his duffle in the corner and collapsed into one of the easy chairs with a sigh. "At last," he said, stretching, "I get to sleep somewhere decent."
"I hope it's not just 'decent,'" said Luida with a smirk.
"This is pretty nice," said Livio, looking around. "You've got a kitchenette and everything. Why don't I have a kitchenette?"
"Unfortunately, we're short on bachelor suites," said Luida.
"You can come over anytime and eat here," said Vash, putting his feet up on the ottoman. Meryl frowned, and he rolled his eyes but leaned forward to pull his boots off. "Besides, we'll probably eat in the hall more often than not."
"I'm sure you'll want to get settled in," said Luida, "but we'll be happy to have you for dinner at six o'clock. And then I'd like to hear about everything that has happened."
Vash stood up. "Right. I'll see you then." He walked her to the door.
"Brad will come by with your arm shortly," she said.
Vash grinned. "Excellent. This one itches."
Luida glanced at his left arm and smirked. "Yes, where did you get that contraption?"
Vash just laughed, and Luida turned and left. "Whew," he said, falling back into a chair.
"It's nice to be out of the desert," said Meryl. "Now maybe I'll be able to shower."
"Hey, there's curry!" said Livio, from the kitchen, which was separated from the rest of the living space by an island with a cabinet overhang. He peeked around the side of the cabinets. "Anyone want lunch?"
"Yes, please!" said Vash. "I'm starving!"
Livio started to make a lot of noise in the kitchen, so Meryl and Millie went to help him. Eventually, they kicked him out, and he walked over to a chair, looking dejected. Chronica sat down, too, and Vash glanced at Knives. His brother sighed and uncrossed his arms, pushing off from the back wall to sit on the couch.
"We need to tell them," said Vash. Knives looked away.
"Tell us what?" asked Livio, kicking up the footrest of his chair. It popped up too fast, and he yelped in surprise.
"At the council meeting," Vash explained, ignoring Livio's curses.
"Council meeting?" asked Chronica, raising an eyebrow.
"That's what Luida always means by asking me to tell her everything." He leaned forward, addressing Knives. "We should tell them what happened." He paused. "I'm going to tell them what happened," he said firmly.
"What happened?" asked Livio. Vash didn't answer. He would know soon enough.
Knives said nothing, didn't even look up, but Vash thought they had waited too long. Chronica had a right to know, most of everyone, and Vash had promised Meryl that he would eventually tell her. Now seemed like as good a time as any, especially with the threat of the Earth Federation and the Eye of Michael. That monster in July… The terrible secret behind that monster in July…
People needed to know how imperative it was that any experiments on Plants be stopped.
"I really need you to be with me on this," Vash tried again. "I can't do it alone."
Knives was staring at the floor, and he finally looked up. He didn't say anything still, but Vash sensed acquiescence. He needed more than that, though. He wanted Knives's permission, but most of all, he wanted Knives to want to talk about it. He'd shut all of it out in the past, and he needed him now to open up to talking about it.
It's fine, Vash.
Are you sure?
"I said, it's fine," Knives hissed.
"What's going on?" demanded Chronica.
Vash tried to smile at her. "We'll tell you at the meeting. I don't want to have to explain it twice."
They ate lunch, and then everyone left for their own rooms. They would meet up for dinner in the main hall, and then afterwards, Luida would lead them to the briefing room. Eventually Brad came in with Vash's replacement arm. He griped about the temporary arm Vash had picked up, saying it was low quality and how could Vash tolerate it, and Vash just sat there patiently, waiting out the storm. Brad disconnected the temporary arm with a snap, and Vash winced, but mostly at the sound. The temporary arm only responded to muscle twitches, and Brad would need to replace the attachment plate. That would hurt.
"I added an easier mechanism for activation, so it shouldn't take so long," said Brad, as though it ever took very long in the first place, "and we upgraded it to a lighter machine gun, so the outside casing could be stronger—"
He went on, but Vash wasn't very interested in the details. He glanced over at Knives, who sat on the other bed. He was leaning over, his arms crossed over his abdomen, and staring at the floor. Vash tried to nudge at his consciousness, but he didn't respond.
"Are you angry?" he asked aloud, thinking that might reach him. Knives looked up and frowned, but Brad spoke instead.
"What? No," said Brad. "Well, a little. I mean, I thought you had better taste than this…"
"I said I was sorry," whined Vash. "I had to make do."
"Yeah, well," muttered Brad, "you deserve better."
Vash stared at him, stricken. "Brad – "
"It's like I've always said," said Brad. "Lost technology for the lost technology—" He stopped suddenly, staring at the temporary arm. His eyes flicked up to Vash's stump, and he frowned.
"What?" asked Vash.
"I don't…" Brad began, but stopped again and turned the temporary arm in his hands. "Did you…"
Vash sat up and leaned over to examine the temporary arm, too. Was there something wrong with it?
"You…" Brad began again, stumbling over the words. "Did you… grow your arm back?"
Vash looked down at the stump of his left arm, which ended just a little above the elbow. "Um… Do you need to get your eyes checked?"
"I just mean that your arm seems longer," snapped Brad. "And if that's the case, then we'll need to make adjustments before I can attach the new model." He put the temporary arm aside, and Vash's mind reeled. His arm—His arm was—
The Plant. In July.
Vash snapped his head around to look at Knives.
Do you think she really healed me that much?
Knives's shoulders moved only millimeters up and down. I grew a whole body. Don't see why you can't grow an arm.
Vash shifted uncomfortably. "It may have healed a little," he said to Brad.
Brad stared at him. "And I thought you couldn't get any freakier," he muttered under his breath, reaching for the medical box. "All right, I gotta take some measurements now. You might have to wait another day for your arm."
"Well, can you put that one back on then?" asked Vash, nodding towards the temporary appendage.
"No," snapped Brad. "That piece of crap is an insult to prosthetics everywhere."
Brad took some measurements of his arm—length, diameter, circumference—and left to find Kain. An uncomfortable silence followed his departure, and Vash couldn't stop wondering if he could have grown back his entire arm while he was in the Plant bulb. Not that he was able to stay inside for any longer than he had; they had already determined that.
"I wish…" began Knives.
Vash turned his head. Knives was sitting on the other bed, his knees pulled up to his chest. He didn't elaborate, but he didn't need to. There would always be scars that would never heal. Could never heal.
"We can't erase the past," said Vash, after a long silence, "even if it looks like some scars are gone." He lifted his right hand in front of his face. The arm that once bore so many scars was smooth now, like the things in his life that had given him those scars had never happened. But they did. He could still feel them inside of him, even if the physical evidence had disappeared. "There's something to be said for forgiving, though. You once said that every scar was a lesson." Knives winced, but Vash kept going. "That's true, you know. Even if it's something terrible, you can learn from every experience. That day… What I learned…"
In that town. All those people, struggling to live. All those people, whom Knives killed without knowing their circumstances…
"Everything is more complicated than I thought. Than it seems." He looked back up at the ceiling. "I'm not going to say that 'everything happens for a reason.' But…" He frowned. "But you can learn from it."
Knives didn't say anything for a long time, and when he spoke, it was with a chuckle. "Huh. I just learned how stubborn you are."
"I told you—" Vash began crossly.
"I know," Knives cut in. Vash frowned, but he let it go.
"It's come in handy a few times, you know," said Vash after a while, trying to joke. "I've gotten through a few tight spots that I wouldn't have been able to survive without a hidden gun in a false arm."
Knives chuckled again. "I have the suspicion that I put in you in some of those tight spots."
"Eh. Most of them."
The suite door opened and two sets of footsteps thumped softly on the floor. Vash propped himself up on his elbow, but before he could ask who it was, Brad's voice called out.
"Vash?"
"In here!"
"Right where I left him, the lazy jerk," Brad said to the other visitor. Brad stepped into view, with Kain behind him.
"Hey, Kain," Vash said, lying back, because it was difficult to balance on one elbow.
"Long time no see, Vash," said Kain, following Brad into the bedroom, a large silver case in hand. "So what did you do this—" He froze abruptly, catching sight of Knives. Kain's mouth dropped open. Knives stared right back at him.
And then looked away.
"Um, this is Knives," explained Vash.
Kain was still staring at Knives, as though he couldn't really believe he was there. "Yeah. Luida said." Kain made no more moves, so Vash cleared his throat, and that seemed to catch his attention. "Right, right," said Kain, stepping up next to Vash. "So what's this about your arm?"
Brad walked him through the measurements again and Kain took some notes before straightening up again.
"Well, that's unexpected," he said. "It's gonna take me a few hours to adjust it."
"Hours?" said Vash hopefully.
"Yeah, we just need to change the parts for the arm above the elbow, right?" Kain shrugged. "I have a couple pieces that might work. It'll at least do ya for a couple days." He turned and clapped Brad on the shoulder. "You're in charge of the attachment plate."
"Right," said Brad. Kain bid them a "See you in a bit," and then Brad assembled some tools on the bedside table. He also placed a plastic sheet under Vash's arm.
"It's been a while, huh?" said Brad.
Vash winced. "Yeah."
"This is gonna hurt," he warned, lifting the new plate up and setting it in place. He lifted a scary-looking tool with several sharp prongs and aligned it with the plate. "Ready?"
Vash squeezed his eyes shut. "Yeah."
"On three. One – " And he pressed the plate into place. Vash cried out involuntarily, and Knives jumped, but the pain subsided quickly as his skin closed around the nerve connectors.
"I knew you were going to do that," Vash said through his teeth.
Brad smirked at him. "Keeps ya relaxed. Can't attach nerves to a tense arm."
Knives sat back down on the bed, but stood up again almost immediately and stood over Brad, looking down at Vash's arm.
"It's okay," said Vash, looking up at him. "We're almost done."
Brad glanced over his shoulder and started when he saw Knives there.
"Sorry," murmured Knives, and Vash wasn't sure who he was apologizing to.
Brad looked back down, his eyes wide, and he looked uncomfortable, his shoulders high and tense.
"Um… Knives…" Vash began
Knives moved around to the end of the bed, his back to Vash, and sat there instead, and Brad relaxed, but only a little.
"Well, uh," said Brad, standing up, "I'm gonna go… help Kain."
After he left, Vash sighed and relaxed back into his pillow.
"Does it hurt every time?" murmured Knives.
Vash wasn't sure how he wanted to answer. "Only when the nerves connect. It's like a quick piercing pain. I'm fine."
It was a white lie. It hurt a lot more than that—more like a thousand needles shooting up his entire arm, tickling his brain. But he didn't see what good it would do for Knives to know that.
Vash fell asleep rather quickly after Brad left, and Knives had a sneaking suspicion that the pain was greater than he was letting on. He tried to take a nap, too, but found it too difficult to sleep. He kept turning, but it didn't help, and soon Vash was fast asleep, and Knives finally got up and walked around the apartment.
It was small. The bedroom fit two beds snugly, and the kitchen was hardly wide enough to walk in. The bathroom was only slightly wider. The living room wasn't much better; it was about the size of the bedroom, but instead of beds, it had three chairs and a couch. There was also a bookcase, so after Knives had finished exploring the rest of the suite, he had no choice but to resort to that for occupation. Vash had many history books, some manuals, and a few old fiction novels from Earth. The fiction books were falling apart. The first one Knives picked out was yellowed, and the cover fell off, the glue deteriorated into dust. He recognized a few titles from some books that Rem had.
Knives finally settled on an early history book, which focused on the first fifty years of human life on Gunsmoke. When he opened it, he was surprised to find writing all over the pages inside, but as he read, his surprise waned. Vash's handwriting filled most of the margins, making corrections to some events, and even adding some details.
Actually, said one comment on the corner of page sixty-five, Col. Hughes was not involved in the scuffle; his partner Jayne was. Witnesses mixed up the two men, since they were really close. At the time, Hughes was at a saloon across town, drinking with me.
History books were funny things. Knives wondered if it was even possible to record history as it actually happened. There was bias everywhere, with victors writing their accounts of the events, skewing everything so they would appear to be in the right. But there were two sides to every story—more than two sides, really. How was anyone ever supposed to understand what had really happened?
Was it possible to know the truth of the past?
Knives closed the book. He wished he didn't have to think. He had been back in the world for months now, and it still felt like torture. Maybe this was his version of hell. He would never die and have to walk around feeling and remembering and…
He leaned over to put his head in his hands. It was worse on the ship, a place that carried an unfortunate resemblance to where he and Vash had grown up. It smelled familiar, underneath all the organic changes that had occurred over the years of the humans living on it. That smell of clean metal and dust… He had destroyed it for a goddamned reason.
And Vash wanted to rebuild—whatever that really entailed, Knives wasn't certain. He wondered if he had almost ruined it all that evening in the desert.
At the time, he could only think about getting out of there, as far away from the threat as possible, because there was no way he was going to let them take Vash again. So Knives had attempted to eliminate the enemy. Dead soldiers couldn't chase after them. He hadn't realized how it would affect Vash.
And for a moment, he wanted Vash to shoot him. He thought that maybe Vash would be much happier if he was gone.
…Vash was right. They had to stop going in circles like this.
There was a knock at the door, and Knives looked at it from his position on the couch. He debated on whether to answer it or not, and when the knock came again, he stood up.
The ornery mechanic looked surprised to see him. "Oh, hey."
"…Hey."
They stared at each other for a long time. Knives considered slamming the door in his face, but Brad hadn't done anything in particular to warrant it.
"Where's Vash?" asked Brad, at last.
"Asleep."
"Oh." Brad shifted his weight. "Well, let's wake him up and finish this arm business."
Knives stepped back, opening the door wider, and Brad walked in, heading toward the bedroom.
"Vash," called Brad, opening the door. "You awake?"
Vash answered with a half-strangled growl.
"Well, you want an arm or not?"
Knives followed Brad into the other room, where he was setting up some tools again. He opened a thick metal case, wherein lay a glossy mechanical arm. Vash, stretching and yawning, leaned over to take a look.
"Looks great, Brad," he said.
"Looks aren't everything," muttered Brad, lifting the arm out of the case. "Dunno why you think you can keep breaking these things."
"It's never on purpose!"
Brad rolled his eyes and began to align the new arm with the attachment plate. Knives walked around and sat on the other bed, behind Brad. Vash's eyes flicked over to him.
"We can go see the Plants later, if you want," said Vash.
Knives leaned forward, resting crossed arms on his knees. "Yeah."
Brad clicked something into place and Vash shifted with a grimace.
"So, uh, Brad," said Vash, clearly uncomfortable in the silence, "how's Jessica?"
Brad shot him a glare, and Vash grinned back uncertainly.
"She's fine," said Brad, wrenching roughly at a tool attached to the arm.
Vash cried out, and Knives briefly felt the same sharp pain shooting up Vash's arm as Brad connected the new limb. Knives jumped up, clenching his fists. He was wrong. He should have slammed the door in Brad's face when he had the chance.
Vash pouted at Brad. "You're supposed to warn me when you do that."
"Sorry," muttered Brad, standing up.
"No, you're not," snapped Knives, and Brad whirled around to face him. "You did that on purpose." He took a step forward, and Brad leaned back a little, his eyes wide. How could Vash trust these people if they would hurt him so easily?
Come to think of it, how did Vash ever trust anyone?
"Knives," said Vash sharply, and Knives's head snapped around to glare at him. "He didn't mean it. It's okay."
"Sorry," said Brad shakily.
Vash sighed and ran a hand through his hair. I'll have to explain Brad to you, said Vash. And then, after a pause: And you, to Brad.
Knives frowned, but before he could reply, there was another knock at the front door.
"I'll get it," muttered Brad. "We're finished here anyway." He took a few quick steps away, but paused in the doorway, his hand on the frame. He turned back. "Sorry." And then he disappeared into the living room.
"You didn't have to scare him," said Vash with another sigh.
"You don't have to tolerate people being cruel to you," snapped Knives. Vash raised his eyebrows and Knives sat back down with a frustrated growl. Every moment was a reminder of his failures.
Brad returned with Meryl and Millie behind him. Vash smiled and pushed himself up into a sitting position.
"Hey guys!"
Millie beamed at him. "Why, Mr. Vash, your arm is fixed!" she said, clapping her hands together.
Vash laughed, swung his legs over the side of the bed, and stood up. "At last!" he shouted, raising his left arm. "My arm is complete again!"
Millie laughed. Brad was packing up his toolbox again, grumbling under his breath, and he turned around. "What happened to the last one, anyway?"
"It… got detached," said Vash, nervously.
Brad glared at him. "Got detached?" He glanced at Knives, but Vash jumped in quickly to explain.
"Some things happened. You'll hear more at the meeting later," he said. "Long story short, something came up, and we had to tear it off."
Brad stared at him. "Well," he said, after a pause, "you'd better take care of this one, or else I'm going to give Meryl a new assignment."
Vash made a face, and Meryl laughed.
"He'll just run away from us again," said Meryl. "He's so lazy."
Knives went into the other room while the others laughed around Vash and his new arm. Suddenly he couldn't stand the thought of being around other people. It was the ship. It had to be. Vash called it "home," and that made Knives feel nauseous somehow. Was it too late to leave?
Yes, it was. Vash was "home." This was what Vash wanted. He would just have to deal with that.
Somehow.
"Knives?"
Knives looked up from where he was sitting on the couch. Vash stood in the bedroom doorway, watching him curiously.
"You disappeared," said Vash.
A second chance. This is what they were trying to do.
"…I'm not going anywhere," said Knives.
Vash smiled. "Shall we visit the Plants?"
Knives debated internally. It was always a relief to see the Plants, but wandering the ship did not sound very wise. There were so many humans here. The worst thing was Vash's apprehension. He tried to hide it, but Knives could feel it. He was afraid of how the humans would react to seeing Knives. It was rather reminiscent of the way Rem had felt. Her fear, that he hadn't sensed until the day the ship's crew woke up. His own consequent fear. He remembered that acutely now. But that was just because he was on the ship.
It was the ship.
"Knives?"
Knives sighed and pushed himself up. "Let's go."
Vash led the way to the Plants, stopping first by Luida's office, where Vash had a short conversation with her behind closed doors. From then on, she took over as tour guide. They walked through the city, to the edge where a door stood against a camouflaged-blue wall. The door led into the interior of the ship, where it all looked like any other SEEDS ship. He knew the layout of most SEEDS ships by heart. They were all generally the same, because they had come right out of factories on Earth, which just stamped out ship after identical ship. The only differences were the names, and those were just letters and numbers.
It all looked the same, smelled the same… but then, it wasn't.
"Knives," said Luida suddenly. He looked up, his brow furrowed in confusion at her addressing him. She smiled, which was a change from her previous cool, professional demeanor. "We have altered the ship to accommodate all of the people in cold sleep, and this room is no exception." She gestured to the door next to her. "I think you'll like it."
He doubted it, but she touched a panel next to the door, and it lit up. The door opened, revealing a deep Plant chamber, containing rows of Plants.
It looked like any other Plant chamber he had seen, but Knives felt something different about it. He felt the presences of the Plants, but they seemed… quiet. Luida stood by the panel, smiling somewhat proudly, so Knives walked over and examined it. The output power levels were normal, but when Knives looked at the speed of the output, his eyes widened. It was much higher than normal. He touched the screen, brushing the power data aside, and it filled with health data. He turned and looked at the Plants, and then back at the screens.
"We've streamlined the energy collection," explained Luida, "to make the system run more efficiently and to allow the Plants to maintain their health for longer." She smirked and added, "Hopefully for as long as their natural lifespan."
"Which is?" asked Meryl.
Luida shrugged. "We don't know yet." She glanced at the three Independents standing in the room. "Over one hundred years is our best guess so far."
Knives walked quickly over to one of the lowest hanging Plants, breaking away from their group.
"Knives," said Vash, following him, the worry in his voice a little irritating, but Knives ignored him.
He put his hands on the bulb and reached out to his sister, who didn't move but did respond with a soft greeting. She seemed very healthy, but according to the power stats, she was one of the main Plants powering the colony. She was one of the largest in the room, but she was much healthier than many of the Plants her size on the surface of the desert planet. He heard Vash step up behind him and stop, and Knives glanced at his brother out of the corner of his eye. Vash laughed and put a hand on Knives's shoulder.
"Cool, huh?" he said, grinning.
Knives's sister made what would have been a cooing noise, if it were audible, through his hand, and Knives's gaze snapped back up to her. She had cleared the fog slightly. She sent him a wave of happiness, and then laughed at him.
What?
She didn't answer, but she opened her eyes and smiled, her sharp teeth showing. She turned her eyes to look behind him, and he glanced over his shoulder toward where the others were waiting patiently next to the panels. When he looked back at her, she was sending him an unfamiliar wave that he couldn't quite translate. It felt comforting and full, but he knew it was meant to be a specific idea.
Vash squeezed his shoulder. "We should go. I'm starving," he complained, clutching his stomach through his red coat. He turned to look up at their sister and waved. "See you later!"
She nodded at him, then glanced at Knives, nodded again, and broke their connection. Knives didn't really want to go. It would be much safer if he stayed with his sisters.
But Vash pulled him back down the steps and out into the hallway again.
"Well, we shouldn't keep everyone waiting," said Luida, once the door to the Plant room was closed again. For some reason, Vash glanced at Knives somewhat furtively.
"I guess so."
Luida smiled gently. "They are all looking forward to seeing you."
Vash laughed half-heartedly. "Yeah, well…"
They walked back to the center of the city, which appeared to be empty and quiet.
"Where is everyone?" asked Millie.
"Oh, they've been keeping busy," said Luida, with a secretive smile. She led them to a large building near the edge of the central area. "This is the great hall," she explained. "We have group meals here, at set hours. Most residents eat with their families, in their homes, but sometimes we have banquets for everyone here." She glanced at Vash as she said this. "Are you ready?" she asked him.
Vash shrugged with an unsure smile. "As I'll ever be."
Knives wasn't sure what they were talking about, but when Luida pushed open the double doors, his confusion immediately cleared.
The moment Vash set foot through the doors, the entire room burst into thunderous cheers. Knives took an involuntary step back, but the others behind him pushed him into the room after Vash. Hundreds of people shouted Vash's name, and a few rushed forward to greet him. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly as they all crowded around him. He stood in the middle, grinning foolishly, looking absolutely pleased to see them. He seemed to know all of their names, too.
After an eternity, the crowd around him thinned as people returned to their seats, and Knives finally saw the dining hall properly. There were round tables scattered all over the room, and the walls were lined with covered food bars and rectangular tables. There were two sets of double doors on each wall, besides the one they had entered through, which appeared to be the largest set of doors.
Once Vash's party had enough room to continue, the people in the hall began to get a good look at them, and Knives felt a little uncomfortable under their stares. He avoided making eye contact with them, instead focusing on his brother's back, but Vash must have felt him staring a hole into his red coat, because Vash turned around.
Are you – he began.
"Vash!" An older man suddenly approached Vash and clapped him on the back. "The prodigal son returns."
"It's good to be back," said Vash, grinning at the old man.
"You've made more friends, I see," he said, glancing around at the people standing behind Vash. His eyes stopped on Knives. Vash stepped next to his brother and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Um," he said, grinning nervously. "This is Knives."
The old man's eyebrows rose so high, it was a wonder they didn't rise right off his head, and he stared at Knives. "That Knives?" he asked.
The chatter that had risen in the hall suddenly quieted, and Knives felt the people turn and stare in their direction. He clenched his teeth. The people stared at them curiously for a while, but as the new information sunk in, Knives could feel a wave of resentment come over them.
Vash seemed to notice it too, because he smile faltered. "Um… Well, yes, but – "
The old man rounded on Knives suddenly, glaring at him, and Knives was taken aback, though he should have expected this. What was Vash thinking, bringing him here?
I'm going to go, he said to Vash, and Vash's gaze snapped to him suddenly.
What?
He began to turn away, but Vash caught his arm and stopped him.
"Knives – "
"I can't," he murmured. "I can't—" He tried to turn away again, but Vash tightened his grip on his arm, a determined look on his face. Why the hell was he doing this? Was Vash punishing him by making him walk through what had become a hall of hatred? What was he thinking?
"It's okay," said Vash, aggravatingly calm and determined. "They'll understand."
Knives stared at him in disbelief, and Vash didn't give him the chance to protest again. He turned around and dragged Knives forward. Knives tried digging his heels in, but that only made him stumble a little, so he let Vash lead him to a table. Luida was already standing there, waiting for them, and she pulled out a chair as they approached.
"Have a seat," she said to Knives. He froze, and Vash pulled him around and forced him to sit. He almost stood up again, just to spite his brother, but Livio sat down next to him, startling him enough that he momentarily forgot to stand up, and when he remembered his intention, the urge had passed.
Chronica sat across from them, looking around the hall curiously, the same way she had been observing the rest of the ship. She seemed rather comfortable, and Knives glared at her until she felt his gaze and finally looked back at him.
"What?"
"Nothing," he muttered.
"We'll get your food," said Luida.
"Oh, that's not necessary," said Chronica, beginning to stand up again.
"You are guests here," said Luida, smiling. "It would be shameful if we made you serve yourselves at a banquet." She walked toward the tables lining the walls, and Vash, Meryl, and Millie followed her.
Livio stood up suddenly and placed a hand on Knives's shoulder. Knives managed to suppress a flinch.
"Drinks?" he asked.
Knives stared up at him.
Livio shook his head and looked up at Chronica. "Do you want something to drink?"
"Tea would be fine."
Livio clapped Knives's shoulder once and walked toward the food tables, too. Chronica watched him go and then turned back to Knives. She watched him for a while, and then looked away, apparently to examine the ceiling.
Knives tried to avoid looking anywhere, but he felt so many eyes on him, it was difficult not to look up and meet their gazes. The conversations were hushed, the hall not nearly as noisy as it was when they first entered. Finally, Knives couldn't take it anymore. He glanced up, making eye contact with a woman sitting a few tables away. She looked away quickly and whispered something to the woman sitting next to her. Knives sighed and pressed his lips together. Maybe he could slip away, back to his sisters, and just stay there until Vash was ready to leave.
He saw Luida sit down a seat away from him, out of the corner of his eye, and when he looked up, Chronica had a plateful of food in front of her. Neither of them touched their plates, and Luida turned to Knives.
"So," she began, "Vash tells me you were reading our history books."
She was looking straight into his eyes, and he forced himself not to look away. "Yes."
"Which volume?"
"The first."
Luida nodded. "Probably the second edition. We're working on a third. If you have any input, we would appreciate your help."
"Yes," was all he could think to say.
Chronica chuckled under her breath, and Knives shot her a glare, but at least it got Luida's attention off him. She turned to Chronica.
"I'm surprised that we haven't met before," said Luida. "We've had many dealings with the Earth Federation."
"Ah, that's right," said Chronica. "You have been in contact with Panse."
"We haven't had word in quite a while. How is he?"
Chronica frowned. "I don't know. We aren't—weren't—in the same squadron. There were many disagreements between his and mine, actually," she added. "I guess you already know."
The edges of Luida's lips curled up. "Yes. His was focused on stopping the Ark… and yours was rather more focused on…"
"Destroying it," muttered Chronica, looking down at her plate. "I apologize for the inconveniences it caused."
"It worked out in the end," said Luida, picking up her water glass. "Didn't it, Knives?"
His head snapped around to stare at her. She looked back at him evenly, taking a sip of water. He looked back down at his hands on the table.
Livio's reappearance spared him the trouble of replying. He set down a cup of steaming tea in front of Chronica, and she thanked him automatically, surprised. Then he put a plate piled high with food in front of Knives, then one in front of his own chair.
"How did you carry all of that?" asked Chronica, staring at the plates. "Do you have three arms?"
"Used to," said Livio, sitting down next to Knives again, and by the look on Chronica's face, that was not the answer she was expecting. He picked up a fork, but Luida cleared her throat, and he glanced up at her. "Oh, right," he said, setting the fork down. "Sorry. Just hungry."
"We all are," said Chronica, smirking. "It's all Vash can talk about."
"He's always had an appetite the size of a house," said Luida. "I suppose you are the same way?" she asked Knives.
He didn't answer. The casual conversation was unnerving.
"Yeah, you bet," Livio answered for him. "One plate probably won't be enough. But it's all I could carry. I don't have four arms, after all."
A woman Knives didn't recognize appeared behind Luida. "Is there any room left, Luida?" Luida bid her sit down, and the woman sat next to her, and at that moment, Meryl and Millie returned. They sat on the other side of Livio, and Brad and the girl from before joined them. Now the table was full, except for Vash's seat, and Knives was tempted to get up and leave – he wasn't sure if he could stand being around these humans much longer – but Vash appeared at his side before he could make a move. He was holding two plates piled high with food, and when he put them down, Knives could see that one of them was just piled with rolls for the whole table. With all the seats filled, everyone finally began to eat, but Knives found that he wasn't really that hungry.
"Jace!" said Vash, addressing the woman next to Luida. "How are you?"
"I'm doing well. It's been a long time, Vash," said the woman, smiling. "Hope you haven't gotten into too much trouble while you've been away," she added.
"You know me," he said, and Knives saw the woman glance his way while Vash wasn't looking, but she didn't say anything.
"What are you doing tomorrow, Vash?" asked the girl from before.
Knives glanced sideways at his brother. What would they be doing on this ship, anyway? Vash's arm was replaced, so they could leave. That's the only reason they came here in the first place.
"I gotta say hello to everybody," said Vash, grinning over his water glass. "Don't wanna get yelled at again."
"I'll come with you," said the girl brightly, and Brad glanced sideways at her, then at Vash, looking displeased.
Vash didn't notice Brad's glare, or else he was choosing to ignore it. "Don't you have school, Jess?"
The girl looked puzzled. "No. I just turned eighteen last month, Vash."
He stared at her, shock freezing his fork midway to his mouth. "What? But you're only four!"
She threw a roll at him, and he ducked out of the way. "That's not even close! You last saw me when I was fourteen, not when I was four!"
"Yeah, but… you're still only, like, this big." He held his hands about two feet apart.
The woman across the table laughed. "Sure seems that way, doesn't it?" she said. "Why, I remember when my Juki was still a tiny tot. He likes to remind me – often – that he isn't."
"It sure is crazy," agreed Vash. "I remember when Brad was eight years old and – "
"All right, stop right there," said Brad quickly. "Just because you never age doesn't mean you can make fun of the rest of us for getting older."
"I'm not making fun," protested Vash. "I'm just saying – you were a funny kid." He glanced at Meryl. "Still has that same grim expression as always," he said in a stage whisper.
Meryl grinned. "I can't imagine him any other way."
Brad growled but kept his mouth shut.
How are you doing? asked Vash.
Knives was surprised into saying Fine, but that wasn't an entirely accurate answer. Everyone at the table was chatting cheerfully. While Chronica kept looking around and asking Luida about the ship, Knives was avoiding thinking anything about the SEEDS ship.
Vash kept trying to coax him into the conversation, but he didn't really want to talk to these people. It seemed that every time he looked up, he caught the eye of someone glaring at him from another table. He knew he was making Vash nervous, being so silent, but he couldn't think of anything to say. What could he possibly talk about with these… humans?
"…And we finally found him in May City," Meryl was saying, when Knives tuned back into the conversation. "And what was he doing? Fooling around."
"Was not!" protested Vash.
"I dunno, I'm inclined to believe Meryl," said Livio.
"I just can't believe they still have you following him around," said the woman next to Luida, shaking her head.
"Well, it's No-Man's Land Broadcasting, this time," said Meryl. She shook her head. "And he disappeared after that. Again." She gave Vash a pointed glare, and he raised his hands in surrender.
"I think that was your fault," he pointed out.
"Where did you go, anyway, Mr. Vash?" asked Millie.
"Hmm… Well, the next city I was in was New Duke. I heard about some Plant malfunctions, and I went to check them out." Vash glanced at Chronica, who looked down. Knives frowned, but Vash ignored his inquisitive mental prod.
Suddenly, Knives realized what he'd just said – Plant malfunctions in New Duke City, near the West Desert. "I heard about that," he said, and nearly everyone at the table jumped. Even Vash was surprised, but Knives shook off the feeling of their eyes on him. "What happened?"
Again, Vash glanced at Chronica. "Nothing," he said, smiling back at Knives. "Everyone was fine. It was just some rumor going around. Where did you hear about it?"
Knives thought for a moment. "Some city between December and Helio."
"I have a niece in Helio City," said the woman, who he thought Vash had called Jace. "She said that the Earth Federation chased Vash through there a few months ago."
Vash started to laugh, and Knives shot him a glare.
"What?" asked Jace, looking worried.
Knives pinched the bridge of his nose, and Vash kept laughing.
Suddenly, Livio got it, and he started to laugh too. He slapped Knives on the back. "You poor bastard! That was you, wasn't it?"
"They did it in December, too," Knives groaned. He scowled at Vash, who was still snickering. "Even Brilliant Dynamites Neon thought I was you."
"Neon's eyes must be going," joked Vash.
"Didn't seem that way when he was shooting at me."
"Um… I'm actually surprised," said Jace, tentatively, and when Knives looked over at her, she shrank back a little. "I mean," she said, "by how… how much you two look alike."
Vash smiled at her. "A lot of people say that. I'm still the more handsome one, though," he added hotly.
"Oh, shut up," snapped Knives, resting his forehead against his fingers.
"But Chronica doesn't really look like you two at all…" Jace trailed off.
"We're from different generations," explained Chronica.
"Yes, she's got too much human in her," said Knives. Vash elbowed him, and Chronica glared.
"And you've got too much sandworm in you," she snapped.
Livio snorted, luckily spitting his water back into his cup or he would have sprayed all over them, and the others laughed. Livio grinned sheepishly and shot Knives a sort of apologetic glance.
"Sorry," he said. "It was funny. Sandworm…" He snickered.
Knives shook his head and rolled his eyes. Vash was looking at Chronica, looking quite put out.
"What?" she said.
"I dun wanna be part sandworm," he whined.
"Oh, don't worry," Chronica reassured him, "Knives got most of the sandworm genes, so you're fine."
Vash looked relieved.
"Yes, but unfortunately," Knives added, "since I received all of the sandworm genes, you have the salmon genes."
Vash looked horrified. "Oh God, I'm a cannibal!" He put his head in his hands, looking down. "I can't believe it… All those salmon sandwiches… I'm so ashamed."
"It's okay, Vash," said Livio. "You didn't know."
Knives had to put his hand over his mouth to hide a grin. He felt Chronica watching him, and when he looked up, she was smiling.
"Well," said Luida, also smiling, "everyone seems to be just about done with dinner, so I propose we move on." She stood up and cleared her throat, somehow projecting that sound like a true public speaker. The hall's noise, which had risen over the course of dinner, softened again until it was completely quiet.
"Thank you all for attending tonight," she said, her voice carrying across the large hall. "We do not often get to celebrate like this, because unfortunately, our guest of honor does not come home very often." She glanced down at Vash with a smile, and he smiled back sheepishly. There was a low murmur of laughter from the hall.
"It is, therefore, my pleasure to welcome Vash home," she continued, and she reached down for her glass and raised it for a toast. Everyone in the room raised their glass along with her.
"To Vash's homecoming," said Luida. "And many safe returns."
"Many indeed!" someone shouted, and Vash just laughed as everyone applauded, though Knives could feel that he felt a little guilty. But the guilt was overwhelmed by happiness. Knives realized with a pang that he couldn't ask Vash to leave again.
After everyone drank and quieted down again, Luida continued. "We have a few new guests, as well, and I would like to extend an equally warm welcome to them." She led the crowd in applause, though Knives could tell it was rather muted.
"Would you like to say something?" Luida asked Vash, and he nodded and stood up as she took her seat again.
"It's great to be back, everyone," he said, grinning like the fool he was. "It's always great to be back. Thank you so much. A lot has happened in the last three years… Well, the last hundred and fifty…" A few people laughed. "Luida's right – we have a few new guests. Which means I've made some new friends."
"Big surprise," someone said, and there was another murmur of laughter.
"You all know Meryl and Millie – " The girls waved, and several people clapped and waved back. "And some of you know Livio – " Livio raised his hand. "For those of you who don't, Livio helped me out in Octovern. But no one's met Chronica, so…" Vash motioned for Chronica to stand, and she obliged, walking over to stand next to him.
"This is my sister, Chronica. She came to Gunsmoke with the Earth Federation."
Chronica nodded and people stared at her curiously. She stepped a little closer to Vash and he took her hand, giving her a reassuring smile. Knives looked back down at the table, feeling that he should have definitely left earlier, to avoid all this. He felt Vash's hand on his shoulder, and Vash's own anxiousness did not help.
Don't take this personally, said Vash.
"So… um… I know some of you are going to be mad at me about this," Vash began, "but this is my brother, Knives." He squeezed Knives's shoulder, his cue to stand up, but Knives didn't move. He could feel the glares; he didn't want to have to look straight back at them. Livio nudged him, and Vash sent a quick pleading wave. He sighed and stood up, the legs of his chair making scraping noises that echoed in the silent hall. When he looked up, he wasn't surprised at all to find shocked and angry faces. He was intruding, after all, where he had no right to intrude.
"I realize that we've had a lot of trouble in the past," Vash continued, and Knives decided to keep his eyes on Vash's face, but even that was difficult. His brother looked nervous and slightly sad. But it was still better than looking anywhere else.
" – But we're rebuilding. Everyone on Gunsmoke is." His voice was stronger now, his eyes more hopeful, and he looked at Knives and smiled.
"I think it's fair to offer everyone that chance," he said, and Knives felt him slowly weave their fingers together. He had to look away, so Vash turned back to the crowd.
"I will explain everything. We will. So… Thank you for all your help, and I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused."
You've caused? Knives couldn't help but think. Vash glanced at him out of the corner of his eye.
Someone in the middle of the crowd stood up suddenly. "Vash, this is foolish," said the man. "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"
Vash laughed, suddenly and easily. "When have I ever?"
Chronica chuckled beside him.
"But he's – " someone else began.
"Family," said Vash, interrupting them. "And you know well, Adrian, that you can't choose your family."
Several people in the crowd snickered, and Adrian fell silent.
Luida stood up once more. "We will discuss everything in a council meeting." She glanced around the room, picking out a few people with her eyes. "Shall we?"
Several people throughout the hall stood up, and then everyone at Luida's table did, too. She led them back across the hall to the doors. A few people stood up as they made their way around the tables, to talk to Vash and Luida, and they all avoided eye contact with Knives, which was fine with him. An older man approached Luida and they spoke under their breaths briefly. When they were done, the man straightened and turned away, leaving the hall quickly.
Vash waved to people who called out to him, and Meryl, Millie, and Livio stopped every once in a while to say hello to someone, but eventually they made it out of the room. The sudden silence of the rest of the ship was startling – no more whispers or the feeling that he was being watched. Knives felt so tense that he couldn't tell if he was relieved or not.
Luida led the group to the edge of the city, until they reached a door leading into an elevator. It was large and round, but Knives stopped short in front of it. He glanced at the silver box. The ceiling was high, with bright lights behind frosted glass panels, and there were metal rails running around the middle of the walls. Everyone walked in, pressing against the walls, but Knives had just gotten out of a room filled with people.
Vash looked over from the elevator, where he was whispering with Chronica, and frowned concernedly.
"Knives?"
"Are there stairs?" he blurted.
Vash gave him a confused look and stepped out of the elevator. "What?"
Knives glanced back into the elevator, where everyone was waiting and looking confused.
Knives shifted his weight onto his other leg and crossed his arms. Can we take the stairs?
What? Why? When Knives didn't answer, Vash sighed and glanced over his shoulder. It's three floors up.
I hate elevators.
Vash frowned. Why?
Knives looked away and pressed his lips together, and Vash sighed and scratched his head.
It won't take long. He paused, apparently waiting for a response. Come on, we've got to go.
Knives looked back up at him, annoyed, and glanced into the elevator again. The others were still watching them, and Knives hated that he was feeling scrutinized by them. He growled in irritation and walked into the elevator with Vash. Luida pressed a button the panel near the doors, and they slid closed. The others were now trying to avoid looking at him, except for Chronica, who was frowning.
What's going on? she asked.
Nothing, snapped Knives. He kept his eyes on the elevator doors, trying to ignore his reflection on the smooth silver. He could tell he looked very tense, and the others were aware of it. He saw Vash's reflection take his hand, and Knives had to resist pulling his hand away and folding his arms. Like a petulant child.
The elevator moved smoothly and the doors opened in no time at all. Knives refrained from exiting the elevator too hurriedly, letting Vash lead him out instead, still gripping his hand. Luida resumed the lead down the hallway, and Vash gently let go, leaving Knives with the strange impression that his hand was very cold.
Note: While editing this chapter, I found way too many A Very Potter Musical references to be healthy. I must have been watching it while I wrote this chapter the first time? Anyway, they should all be gone now.
2014-07-22