He was unaware of how it all happened, but as soon as they apparated into his living room at Spinner's End a familiar scene began to unravel. Only this time he had given Lavinia the sudden electrifying intimacy you would expect from couples in their honeymoon phase. Severus Snape was not the kind of man you would expect to go unhinged. He loathed loss of control over one's mind and body after the tragedies that occurred in his early death eater days. Yet somehow his mouth had crashed into hers uncontrollably. This was not how he usually coped with stress let alone impending doom. He cursed himself as he remembered that fateful night in their shared chambers at Hogwarts, because he was the one who had told her this could not continue.
Now he was the hungry depraved fool that fiercely forced his tongue into her mouth once more. He was too overcome with urgency and desire to care about the regrets he might have come morning. Snape had felt Lavinia's eyes delay in their closing. He had felt the tickle of her eyelashes against his closed eyes nearly a minute after he dove for that first deep kiss. He had half expected her to protest by breaking it off, and hotly deny him of what he craved. He was relieved when she had not, because the last thing he wanted at the moment was for her to start another heated argument. Snape had been kissing a statue at first, her body had tensed up against his, and he almost broke away from her to accept the rejection. As he lifted his lips a few millimeters away from hers, giving her what he thought would be one last firm peck, her soft lips begun to slowly molding against his. She cautiously followed his suit, but her hungry lips began match the intensity of his.
He began to guide her through the open living room door, cautiously supporting her with his arms, allowing her some time in between each step. He prayed that she would not fall and tumble down the steps, because Lavinia was currently walking up the stairs backwards with his lips assaulting hers. His mouth barely left hers and it only did so for a few seconds for air. He could hear her soft panting breaths in between their breaks for air, and that sound only drove him further into the depths of insanity.
"Severus," she mumbled, almost in half protest but inflamed at the same time.
"No talking. Not now. I'm not done with yet," he half growled, sprinkling kisses across her jawline.
He began to trail more wet kisses down her neck. He busted the door of the bedroom that they had ceased sharing since their arrival back at his abode for Christmas break. He could hear her groan from his relentless probing of the wet caverns of her mouth. His hand had been running along the bodice of her dress, but when they inched down towards underneath her skirts his hand was swatted away.
He gave her an exasperated glance at first thinking she was purposefully trying to be torturous and cruel, but her concerned hazel eyes with a brimful of tears wiped off that glance right away.
"I didn't hurt you did I?"
"No of course not, but I can't do this Severus. Not after what you said a couple of weeks ago. It was your idea to distance ourselves a bit wasn't it? Yet here you are trying to jump my bones," she said patchily, trying to steady her breathing as she did so.
"It's not that simple. I was trying to keep my word, but after all the stress from that bloody Christmas dinner I've seem to have gone unhinged," he replied breathlessly.
Snape was struggling to regain the right state of mind, and his normal self would have beat him for the ridiculous explanation that had just escaped his lips. He did not want to get up from the position they were currently in, because he could feel Lavinia squirm from the amount of dominance he was exerting at the moment.
They had somehow ended up on the bed amidst their snogging, fondling, and hair tugging. She was in a compromising position given that black eyes bore intensely into hers. The dreaded potions master that all the students feared at Hogwarts was practically on top of her. She was trapped in between his legs as they straddled her hips. She now could partially empathize with how the students feared Snape, but he was now exuding a different kind of charged energy that unnerved people-women in the particular. It was not something she believed was possible from him. It was now Lavinia's turn to dread losing control over herself and contradicting the reason for rejection she had just given him. She continued to stare back at the dark brown and almost obsidian eyes that bore intensely into hers, involuntarily licking her bottom lip, and biting down on it hard. It did not help that Snape was eying the half moons of her half exposed breasts hungrily.
"Must I move?" he asked in his usual velvety baritone, tucking in some of the tresses of raven locks that had gone astray in their struggle.
"Don't give me that tone or that look," she grumbled, lifting the arms that were pinning her down gently onto the bed. Lavinia had finally broken away from her trace, and she needed to eliminate as much physical contact so he would not have a hold over her. She slid away from the small space that was in between their bodies. She sat herself back up, smoothing out her semi-wild hair from the uncalled for spontaneous snog fest.
"Would your sudden enthusiasm be related to that private conversation you had with Vold-"
She was cut off mid-question by the sharp glare Snape made as a warning not to continue. If she had addressed the Dark Lord in the manner she had wished he might telepathically tune into their conversation at any second. "I mean your other master," she corrected herself.
His face contorted its previously harsh features from the glare he threw at her to a forlorn one. The last time she had ever seen such a look on Snape was the day she had told him that Lily would refuse reading any of the apology letters he had sent her. The redheaded Gryffindor had also denied him of the audiences he practically begged her for to meet in private.
Lavinia closed the space in between wishing that she had perhaps rejected him a bit less harshly. It was rather spiteful of her to have rejected him earlier for a statement he might not have wanted to make weeks before. Lavinia reached over and laced her fingers into his, hoping that her warmth would comfort him, and she looked at him expectantly for an explanation.
"I have no idea how you would be able to stomach the idea of me having to help Draco in his mission for the Dark Lord. I cannot not tell you currently what it entails as it may jeopardize my well being and the other parties involved. It will not be child's play I assure you...I have battled personal demons over what must be done," he began explaining in a hushed tone, the dark expression on his face darkened as he went on. "The matter at hand now, however, concerns you. If I had known the day the the Dark Lord presented you to me that all this would have happened...I would have suffered a hundred Cruciatus curses to avoid the possible pain that would befall on me if you are injured again at their hands...or if I was forced to lose you. The momentary torture I would have suffered for disobeying the Dark Lord would be nothing in comparison," he declared with a blanched expression.
With those small sum of words Severus Snape had declared his care and love for another woman. He did not feel that it was yet appropriate to actually say those words 'I love you', because they had hardly explored the depths of a proper relationship together. Not that the start of the relationship was conventional to begin with, but he would have been lying if he had denied this indescribable urge to keep her safe and out of harm's way.
"One must be cautious when dealing with the Dark Lord...he may be generous at times with his gifts, but one cannot be naive and think that he would not ask to take back. When he does decided to take from you the cost will be so much greater in comparison to what he gave you. He gave me you...I do not believe that he is alarmed in anyway that our relationship may be more than servant and master. He could never see clearly or understand what it means to care for such a person let alone love. He was unable to detect my affections for Lily when I asked him to spare her. To my knowledge he is convinced that I am using you as my personal sexual plaything," he spat at the last three words, bile forming in his throat from his hatred and disgust over the term.
He gripped onto her hand tighter, giving it a squeeze, before he continued on to finally reveal the information that he had been concealing from her all evening.
"It is the Dark Lord's wish that I kill you over the summer. He wants to use you death as emotional leverage over Potter. He is planning and strategizing the most opportune time to strike against Potter...so that he may even kill him before his seventh year begins," he revealed crestfallen, wincing as he had to repeat his orders.
Lavinia's hand slackened in his, he could almost feel the blood run cold in her veins, and it almost broke his heart to see the color in her face fading.
"No..no...there must be another way," she choked out.
"I fear the worst...that there may not be another way, but we must be closer than ever. We have to speak to Dumbledore about these turn of events. We have to pool all our wits and resources to ensure that the Dark Lord does not have his way. I do not want to make any empty promises, but I promise you I will not sleep until we find a possible solution. I will risk it all to execute that plan when that time comes despite all the possible ways in could fail," he said almost desperately, giving her hand a squeeze, before placing it against his lips.
"I suppose that is your way of unofficially making an Unbreakable Vow. I accept it wholeheartedly, Severus," she said, with her eyes brimming with tears. She leaned in towards him giving him a soft chaste kiss on the lips.
The kiss was deadlier as a Dementor's Kiss since it was laced with an overpowering kind of venom. It was a kiss of Death that ultimately tied a man's life to a woman who may potentially have to leave him prematurely. The first love of Severus Snape had already perished in the clutches of Voldemort, and he did not wish for Lavinia to shadow the same ill fate.
A/N: I am sorry for the delayed update. In my absence I was training for my summer job, and I am currently working with children over the summer which can be very tiring. Given that I have to juggle 5 work days and my social life over the summer I do not have scheduled writing or update timeline, and I apologize for that. I am eternally grateful to all of you who stick around to read my story. I also may or may not be sorry that I killed your anticipation if you were hoping for a lemon in this chapter ;)