CHAPTER 26
ALL CREDIT TO ELJ
CHRISTIAN
"Jesus fucking Christ! Can't we just have one single moment of happiness without one of our family members swooping in to shit all over it?" I yell in frustration.
Ana, who's still on my lap at the kitchen table, calmly rubs my shoulders to calm me down. She follows the rub with a gentle kiss on my neck and I forget all about my anger.
"Shall I tell the guards to turn him away, boss?" Taylor asks.
I'd love nothing more than to tell Raymond Steele to fuck off and to go back to Montesano, but I've reached my breaking point with all the friction with our family.
"I'd like to say a few words to my father," Ana chimes in.
"Let him in, but I swear to god, Ana, I will not hesitate to kick your father's ass if he starts any shit. We're supposed to be celebrating our engagement, not arguing with family members."
"If you want to kick his ass, you'll have to get in line," Ana says. "I call dibs."
I give Taylor the nod and he types something on his phone as he starts to walk away. Gail tells us she's going to grab some champagne and my fiancé turns to look at me.
She grabs my face before bringing her lips to mine.
"We're getting married," she says in awe.
"We're getting married, baby," I say as I nibble behind her ear. She grinds on my dick, giving me a flirty look as she feels my erection.
"You're going to get a lot of that tonight," I whisper in her ear as I do a mini thrust. She giggles as she kisses my lips again.
"You always know exactly what I need," she says.
"That's because I love you."
"I know you do. And I love you," she says as she looks into my eyes. I almost feel my eyes fill with tears at having the unbelievable luck of meeting her, falling in love with her and having her love me back, despite all the bullshit we've endured.
"Your father is here, Ana." Taylor's voice breaks me of my revelry. I reluctantly break eye contact from my fiancé and look at her father.
He's standing in our kitchen, looking as formidable as always. He's about Taylor's height, well built and still youthful looking.
We both stare at him, waiting for him to speak. I'd offer him a seat, but I'm not feeling particularly welcoming.
"Ana. Christian," he says, taking off his Mariner's baseball cap.
"Dad."
"Christian, I think I owe you an apology for how things went down earlier today," he begins.
"You think you do?" Ana says, getting up from my lap and walking towards Ray. She stands directly in front of him, hands on her hips. She's about half his height and maybe one third his weight, but I see him take a step back.
"Listen, Ana, I admit I was an ass this morning I'm sorry." He looks past Ana and makes eye contact with me. "Christian came over with good intentions and I was a jerk, though you could have just answered the question, son."
"The question about whether or not he's faithful to me, dad? How is that any of your business? He was trying to reach out and you shit all over it," Ana says before I can answer.
"He was, Ana. I admit my part in this. That's why I'm here. And it's my business because you're my daughter. I was looking out for you."
"Wow. You were looking out for me. Where was this concern when I was fourteen, dad? I needed you to look out for me when I was a kid and a scared teenager, but all you and Carla did was ignore me and make me feel unwanted, but now at twenty four you want to assert your authority to my fiancé? Give me a break. I needed you then, not now."
I see Ray's shoulders sag in defeat and for a second, I almost feel bad for him. Almost.
I look at Taylor as he mouths 'oh shit' to me.
"You're right, Annie, I was a shitty father and an even shittier husband to your mother. All we ever did was cheat on each other, and I don't want that for you. I'm sorry."
"You both were shitty parents, dad, but I'm done dwelling on that. You say you trust my judgment, right?"
"I do."
"Then you should trust that I'd never be with someone who would cheat on me. I've had enough of that living with you and Carla to last me a lifetime. It's too late for you to treat me like a child. You actually had the opportunity to do that when I was an actual kid. You blew it, so you don't get to do it now."
"You're right, but I'm still your father, Annie. I still want to be part of your life. I don't want to lose all the progress we've made in our relationship since your mother died." Ray rubs his hands over his face, and for the moment I actually do feel sorry for him. "You're the only family I have."
"Dad, the only way you will lose me is if you continue to be an ass to my fiancé. He loves me, and you'd see it if you would spend any time with us."
"So, you did it, huh?" Ray says looking at me.
"I did it," I respond.
Ray clears his throat once the room goes silent.
"Listen, you two. I'm really happy for you both. Congratulations. I assume Ana told you some of the problems I had in my marriage?" He asks.
"She did," I say with a nod.
"Well, since Carla died, I've done a lot of soul searching and when I look back, I see all the damage we both did to Ana and to each other. Despite all of that, she grew up into a wonderful woman, no thanks to the two of us. I don't want her to have to go through what I put Carla through. That's why I asked what I did, but Annie's right. She would never be in a relationship like that. She's much stronger than I realize sometimes. So, congratulations on the engagement. I'm really happy for you both. I hope you both will accept my apology." I walk to them and put my arm possessively around Ana's waist.
"Apology accepted, Ray. We've done enough fighting in this family to last a lifetime. Spend the weekend with us. I'd like to get to know you." I offer him my hand and he takes it, giving my hand a firm shake. For the sake of Ana, I actually do want a good relationship with my future father in law.
"I'd like that if it's okay with you, Annie."
"Of course, dad."
"Hey, Grey and future Grey," Elliot says giving Ana a kiss on the cheek, oblivious of the frigid temperature in the room.
"Uncle Chrissy!" EJ says running towards me for a hug. He soon leaves me and goes to his favorite person.
"Pick me up, Tay!" And Taylor lifts him and sits him on his shoulder.
"Lift me," Jackson says, pulling on Taylor's pants, but then he notices Ray, who's nearly as tall, and forgets about Taylor.
"Up," he says to Ray, lifting his arms. Raymond swoops him up and sits him on his shoulder just like Taylor did to EJ.
"What happening?" Kate says as she breezes in. I notice they have multiple overnight bags.
"We're staying the weekend, by the way," Elliot says.
"My house is not a damn resort, Elliot. Take your family to Disney Land like you've been promising, you cheap bastard."
"Bastard!" Both boys yell out before they start to giggle.
"Jackson! Evan James! Enough of that," Kate chastises.
"Evan James? You mean EJ doesn't stand for Elliot junior?" Ana asks in disbelief.
"Um, no. His mother hates me, Ana. Anyway, what's the news you want to share?"
"Ana and I have an announcement." I get up from the kitchen table, walk over to Ray and extend a hand to him, offering him a truce. He takes my hand and gives me a nod in understanding.
"Pop the champagne, Gail," I say to her.
Gail quickly pops the bottle of Armand de Brignac Brut Gold.
"Oh, shit, Kate! He's opening the good stuff," Elliot says to Kate, and they both high five each other.
"Shit," EJ whispers.
"Evan James," Kate warns again. "Elliot Grey, watch your language!"
"Sowwy," EJ says, not looking the least bit contrite.
"Sorry, babe."
"Let me get Jose on FaceTime! Christian, should we call your dad too?" I shake my head no and remind Ana that dad's out to dinner with Grace tonight. Part of their therapy is to go out alone once per week. Even though dad moved back home after Adelle's heart scare, he has not put any pressure on us to forgive Grace.
And even though Grace got her Pediatrician of the Year award, it was in absentia since she was at her mother's bedside.
"Hey, gurl," I hear Jose say. "My mama's making progress. She's only been to church once today, and there hasn't been a priest in sight yet. Hey, is that Ray in the background? Hey, Ray. Elliot and Kate are there too? You wait til I go out of town to have a party over at G-Money's? You're cold, Ana. You just wait until I get back," he rambles.
"Do you want to hear what we have to say, or are you going to continue to run your mouth?"
"Speak, child!" Jose says dramatically, wiping imaginary sweat from his forehead.
"We're getting married!" Ana screams.
Everyone is silent for about two seconds until everything turns into pandemonium. Elliot snatches Ana into a bone crushing hug. Kate starts to cry. Ray sets Jackson down and takes Ana from Elliot and hugs his daughter.
The boys are running around screaming for absolutely no reason.
I grab the iPad to find Jose doing the worst ugly cry I've ever seen. He dramatically sniffs and swipes the tears from his eyes. I just stare at him and fight off the laugh that bubbling inside of me.
"What's wrong with him, uncle Chrissy" EJ asks. I turn to see both boys staring at Jose too.
"I'm just so happy, EJ. I'm going to have the wedding of my dreams through my BFF. It's what I've always dreamed of," he says before he goes back to his ugly cry. The boys just give the iPad and odd look before they start chasing each other.
"A toast, boss!" Gail orders as she hands me a glass of champagne. I set the iPad down so Jose can see and hear and reach for my fiancé.
She comes over and takes my hands.
"For once, I'm speechless. Let's just say, I'm the luckiest man on this planet. Fate threw Ana in my path. I was going through one of the roughest times of my life. My private life was a public joke. My company was in trouble. My relationship with my mother had gone down the toilet, and I had fallen into a depression. I was at an all time low until one rainy Monday morning when I saw the most beautiful woman working in my building." I turn to face Ana. "Baby, I was drawn to you from that instant. I knew from that moment on that you were the key to everything. So out of all the ugliness, I got the most beautiful gift, and that gift is you." He eyes fill with tears, and she leans in to give me a kiss. I look up to find both Gail and Kate crying. Gail is holding on to Taylor, who looks a little emotional himself.
"That's a beautiful speech, G-Money. Ana, show me the damn ring, girl!"
"It's not ready yet. Soon, though," I say.
"G-Money, I know you didn't just propose to my girl without a fat diamond for her petite hand. Hell no! I bet Ana was like I don't need a ring, honey."
"That's exactly what she said," I laugh. "I'm going to give you everything, baby," I say to her.
"You already have."
"Okay, you two are lame now. When are we gonna do this thing? I've never been a best man before."
"Why do you assume you're going to be the best man, Elliot? I'm the one who actually helped the boss get the girl." Taylor says.
"Oh, stop. You both can be my best men." They high five each other and Gail rolls her eyes.
"I'm going to warm up the dinner I made earlier. Someone turn on some music. Let's celebrate!" Gail turns towards to the refrigerator.
Hours later, I find myself sitting in on the couch in the master bedroom as I wait for my fiancé. For hours we ate dinner, drank champagne and laughed. We took the party to the pool. Everyone got in the pool, but Ana and I sat in the hot tub and talked about the first time we were in the hot tub together.
"I wanted to do this," I say as I reach for her, lift her and place her on my lap. "And this," I say before I kissed her deeply. The kiss is only interrupted by Elliot's whistling and clapping.
"Come on out, baby!" I yell from the couch as I type some instructions for tomorrow. "I'm ready to consummate our engagement."
I'm already semi hard in nothing but my boxers as I wait for my fiancé to come out. I could barely keep my hands off her in the shower after our swim, but she told me she wanted me on the bed tonight, and because I always want to give her what she wants, I agreed.
I hear the door to the bathroom open, followed by footsteps. I'm busy texting, so I don't look up until her I see her shadow in front of me.
"Is this what you thought about when you first saw me that rainy Monday in March?" I look up to find Ana standing in front of me in a flimsy silk robe and a pair of red stilettos.
She unfastens the sash to the robe and it crumples to the floor, revealing her naked body.
"You wanted to see this? Touch it? Taste it?" She cups both breasts, and I like my lips and nod like an idiot. "Tell me. Tell me what you wanted to do to me when you first saw me."
I stand up and stand in front of her.
"How about a little show and tell?" Before she can respond, I scoop her naked body up bridal style and carry her to the bed.
"I wanted to do so many things to you. I wanted to bring you here and worship your body," I say as I throw her on the bed. Before she can adjust herself, I'm on top of her, pinning her to the bed. "Then I saw the look in your eyes when you recognized me, and I wanted to spank your little ass red for judging me."
I turn her around so she can lay on her stomach. I leave a trail of wet, hungry kisses down her spine. The goosebumps on her body confirm how turned on she is. I reach her round butt and bit each cheek.
"Ah," she says as I bite hard. I reward her whimper with a hard smack on each cheek, leaving a handprint.
I flip her around and spread her legs open so I can rest between her thighs.
"I would have given my entire fortune to kiss those lips that morning." I take her lips and kiss her roughly. I bite and suck on her bottom lip. "Do you know you bite your lip when you get nervous? You were biting your lip and looking everywhere but at me. I wanted to take that lip between my teeth just like this." I bite her bottom lip again, pulling at it before I put the entire thing in my mouth to suck.
"I knew you wanted me," I say as she blushes.
"Conceited," she says, batting her eyelashes.
"Perceptive."
"Hopeful," she throws back at me.
"Astute, baby. I could read your body each morning. I wanted to kiss you here," I say as I kiss her lips again. "And here." I kiss her collarbone. "Here." I kiss both breasts, sucking on each nipple.
I feel a sharp intake of breath as she wraps her legs around me.
"Here. And here," I say as I kiss her sternum and navel. "Most of all, here," I say as I spread her pussy lips apart and lick her clit."
"Oh, god, Christian," she says as she bucks underneath me. I pin her down as I lick her from clit to slit. I stick my tongue inside of her, driving her crazy. She throws her head back, arches her back and calls out my name over and over again.
"I thought about you coming on my face that first day I saw you," I say as continue to torture her pussy with my mouth. I finally bite down on her clit, and she comes on my face. "The taste of you, baby. You're delicious. Most of all that first morning, I wanted to give you this." I don't give her time to think. I crawl back on top of her, capture her mouth so that she can taste herself on my tongue. She sucks on my tongue hungrily, pulling it all the way into her mouth.
As she continues to suck on my tongue, I slide my hard dick into her waiting and wet pussy.
"Oh, god, baby. You feel so good. You were made for me," I say as I start to thrust into her heat.
"I was made for you, Christian."
"Say that to me again," I order as I continue to pound into her.
"I was made for you. I love you." I take her mouth again. I grab one of her legs, spreading it wider so I can go deeper, filling her all the way to the hilt. With our lips devouring each other, and my dick going in and out of her, I fuck her with everything in me.
I pour all of my strength and love into fucking her. I reach my hands underneath her and grab both ass cheeks, pushing her closer and me deeper.
I know she's about to go over the edge once she throws her head back and her body starts to shake.
She speaks, but her words make no sense. I thrust even harder until she finally crashes, screaming my name and telling me she loves me over and over again.
I collapse on top of her as my own orgasm follows hers. My mind goes blank as I spiral out of control, filing her fully with my seed.
With our bodies slick with sweat, I lay on top of her as we both attempt to catch our breath.
I slide out of her and pull her into my side. She slips an arm around me and lays her beautiful head on my chest. She moves her hand up and lays it on my chest, right above my heart.
I lean over and kiss the top of her messy head, pulling her even closer.
"You wanted to do all of that to me the first you saw me? And you call me filthy," she says, practically out of breath.
"I have zero regrets. Wait. That's not true. I regret waiting over three months to make you mine."
"Yeah, you should have made your move sooner, Grey." I tickle her ribs and she lets out a little yelp of surprise. She tries to move away from me, but I don't let her.
"You know I've always been a loner. I was happy to be by myself. I decided long ago that I didn't need anybody. But that all changed when we met, Christian. I've come to realize that as much as I love you, I need you just as much, and that was a hard concept for me to grasp. I think I knew from the beginning that I would need you, and that's why I didn't want to be with you. Needing you scared me more than loving you. I didn't want to need anybody, but it's too late now. I love and need you, Christian Grey."
I roll her on top of me and squeeze her body against mine.
"Those are the most beautiful words anyone has ever said to me. I love that you need me, and I need you too. You'll never have to be without me."
"God, we sound so pathetic," she says and we both laugh.
"Not pathetic, just needy," I say back.
She takes her hand and roams it all over my chest before she slowly moves it down until she reaches my dick.
"You want to know what I wanted to do to you that first day, and the days after? You want to know what you did to me every morning when you would show up in my line looking so fucking sexy in one of your designer suits? Let me show you," she says as she scoots down my body until her face is in front of my dick. My once flacid dick, which now standing at full attention.
"Oh, shit," I say as she takes me all the way to the back of her throat.
And that's how the night went. We stayed up until dawn worshipping each other and whispering words of love.
"You're the best fiancé I've ever had," I say as I kiss Ana's neck, and work my way up to her lips.
"I better be the only fiancé you've ever had, Grey," she says against my mouth. She puts both hands in my hair as I deepen the kiss.
"Will you two cut it out?" Ray says in fake irritation. "Are they like this all the time?" He asks Elliot.
"Yes!" Both Elliot and Kate say at once. "It's sickening." We ignore them both as we continue to kiss.
It turns out, Ray's not such a bad guy. He's great with the boys, and despite what went on during Ana's teen years, he loves his daughter. He took me aside and wanted confirmation that we weren't going to push him out of our lives. He only visibly relaxed when I assured him that I would never do that, and I know Ana wants him around.
Ray offered to grill for us on Saturday, and since I knew mom would be working that day, I called dad and asked him to join us. Ana was worried about the tension between our dads from her birthday party, but there was none of that as our dads, me, Taylor and Elliot talked fishing as Ray grilled and the ladies talked about wedding dresses.
"Are you guys sure it will be okay for me to come to this thing?" Rays asked.
The think he's referring to is our family brunch. I called Shana and asked if she could push the brunch back so Ana could come. Ana called her study group and moved her study group up one hour and invited them here instead of the WSU library. Apparently, no one turns down an invitation to Christian Grey's house.
"Of course, it's okay."
"Yup. We're all one big happy, dysfunctional family around here, Ray," Elliot says as he grabs EJ and lifts him up. "We're heading out there now. We'll see you guys over there."
"Give me a few minutes to change and we can go." Ana gives me one last kiss before she runs off to change, leaving me alone with her dad. Even though he spent the weekend with us, this is the first time we've been alone since that disaster on Friday.
"I'm glad I got to spend time with you two. She's so damn happy, so thanks for that. I really like your brother and Kate, too. "
"You're welcome anytime. Ana loves you, Ray. And to answer your questions from Friday, yes, I can and will be faithful to Ana, and I have been. You don't ever have to worry about that with me."
"I know that now." Before we can say anymore, Ana comes running into the room. She put her hair down and it's in soft waves around her shoulders. She's in a pair of dark blue skinny jeans, a loose top that ties in the front with a blaze thrown on top.
"You look beautiful. Come on." I take her hand, lead her into the garage. "I'm finally going to get to drive your car," I say as I open the passenger door to her Bentley.
Ray follows us in his truck since he's leaving for Montesano from my grandparent's house. Part of the reason I really want Ray here is so he can see how much my family, with the exception of Grace, loves Ana.
As soon as we walk into my grandparent's house, my grandmother engulfs me and Ana in a tight hug.
"My turn, Adelle. Move," my grandfather gently shoves her aside so he can hug us.
We hear champagne bottles popping and loud cheers from the rest of the family, which includes my parents, aunt, uncle, cousins, Mia, Elliot, Kate and the boys. I look around and even see Jose standing there behind my grandfather, waiting to hug Ana.
"What's this?" I ask.
"We heard the good news!" My grandmother says.
"How?" I ask dumbfounded. "We wanted to tell everyone ourselves."
"Christian, you know your father and Elliot can't keep a secret to save their lives." I look at dad and Elliot who avoid making any eye contact with me. I look to find Grace standing there in front of me. She has a small smile on her face, but her eyes are filled with tears. She's unsure of how to proceed. I know she wants to hug us but doesn't know if it will be welcome.
I count to ten, think back to what the shrink said about not openly rejecting her attempts at reconciliation. I look at my grandmother's expectant face, count to ten again. She opens her arms, and I step into the hug. She hugs me tight but is still careful of my touch issues. I feel her hot tears on my neck and I relax a little bit into the hug.
"I love you, son," she whispers in my ear.
"I know you do. I've always known that, but-." She stops me before I can say anymore.
"I know I've a lot to make up for. Just give me a chance to do it. Please," she begs, but before I can say anything, Elliot grabs me and gives me a bear hug. I almost laugh because I know that's his attempt at saving me from our mother.
"My turn!" Jose practically yells as he pulls Ana away from Shana and Mia and hugs her tight.
"Jose! How did you get here?" Ana asks.
"Your future mother in law called and invited me. No thanks to you and G-Money. I thought we were tight, guys. First, you celebrate on Friday without me and now you freeze me out of the Grey gathering," he says playfully. He lets go of Ana and hugs me too.
"You don't need an invitation from them, honey. You're welcome here anytime," my grandmother says to him.
"And that's why you're my new BFF, grandma T." Jose walks away and goes to talk to Ray.
For the next few minutes, everyone takes turns hugging and congratulating us, including Mia, who openly weeps on my shoulder as the rest of the family drinks champagne.
Carrick, Elliot and Theo pull Ray out into the yard so he can grill some steaks for us, and the women and Jose all shove Ana into the living room to talking about wedding plans.
I stand back and smile at the shrieks of laughter as my grandmother tells stories from when she planned her wedding to my grandfather.
"Gracie, go get my wedding album so I can show Ana and Kate." My mother runs to do grandmother's bidding. Once she hands over the album, she comes and stands next to me.
"This is all I've ever wanted for you, Christian. All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy."
"Well you certainly didn't act like it when I first brought Ana home, or when you accosted her in my office," I bite back, the memories bitter. This is the type of attack the therapist warned me against.
"I was so happy when your father told me the news. And then I was angry at myself because we no longer have the type of relationship where you would call and share the news with me immediately. I know that's my doing."
"Mother, please. Not now," I say dismissively.
"I know I have a lot to make up for. I want to help with the wedding. Will you at least let me do that?"
"We haven't talked any wedding details yet, and it's up to Ana if she wants that. I'm not going to insist that you be included, though. She's not comfortable with you." I refuse to spare her feelings. She needs to own her part in this.
She hangs her head for a minute. When she looks back up, her eyes are filled with tears.
"I understand, but I thought that-"
"You thought what?" I prod.
"I thought that since we had a talk when mother was in the hospital, she would be more comfortable around me."
"What talk?" I ask. "Please tell me you didn't say anything else to offend her."
"No, of course not. She comforted me, actually. I was in a bad place and she made me see that not everything was hopeless." Grace tells me the rest of the conversation between her and Ana.
"She said that? She never told me," I say, in awe of my fiancé's heart.
"I'm not surprised. Look, Christian. I was wrong about all of it. I was embarrassed by what happened a year ago, and I handled it all wrong. I failed you when you needed me the most and I have to live with that. I'm just asking you for the opportunity to fix things between us. I know it's more than I deserve, but please think about it." She plants a soft kiss on my cheek and walks into the kitchen to prepare some of the side dishes for lunch.
"Oh, my god, you looked so beautiful," Ana says as she looks at what I presume is my grandmother's wedding album.
"I still have that dress."
"It's beautiful. And timeless," Ana says wistfully.
"It's yours if you want it, honey. You can get it altered any way you want."
"Um, no, grandma. Ana, we can get you something custom made. Vera Wang or Monique Lhuillier are it!" I shake my head as an argument ensues between Mia, Jose and Shana about who makes the best wedding dresses.
"Are you crazy, Mia. She'd drown in a ball gown. I was thinking more of a mermaid style," Jose says.
"Let's watch my wedding video," Shana says as she pulls out an iPad. I pour myself some more champagne as I continue to watch them.
"Ana, you should totally get married there! Look at that view," Jose says.
"You were a beautiful bride, Shana. Wow," Ana says in awe. "And there's Christian! You look so deep in thought, baby. What were you thinking about?"
"You. I spent the entire weekend thinking about you and how I wish you were there with me." And cue the blush.
The guys come walking back inside, laughing at something Elliot just said.
"How did you propose, honey?" Adelle asks.
"I wasn't going to propose then. The ring's not even ready yet. I had a horrible day on Friday and we got into a huge fight. I was a bit of a jerk."
"Oh, you were more than just a jerk," Ana says without even looking up from the iPad.
"I was a bit put off by some stuff that happened earlier that day. Ana left and went to Gail and Jason's, and I followed her. I apologized for my bad behavior and she forgave me. She looked so beautiful standing there, and I just couldn't wait another second to ask her. I told her all about the proposal I had planned. The one with the diamond ring and fireworks, and she told me she didn't need all of those things. So, I asked, and she said yes."
"Oh my god," Jose says as he wipes tears from his eyes.
"That's beautiful, Christian."
"I told you I was easy," Ana says to me.
"Not that easy. You made me wait for months," I say to her.
"That's my girl!" My grandmother yells out.
"I did not make you wait for months. How was I supposed to know you were interested in me? I thought you were coming to the café every morning because you liked my muffins."
"He liked your buns too," Elliot yells out, and everyone laughs.
"Her father's still in the room, Elliot," Ray says, and Elliot just shrugs.
"Let's get back to wedding talk," Shana says. "When and where? Have you guys set a date yet?"
"Uh, we haven't talked about any of that yet? Maybe we can elope?" She says looking at me. Everyone gives her a horrified look and pretend they didn't hear that suggestion.
"When am I going to get a new great grandbaby? Shana, that question goes to you, too. We need a girl." This from Adelle.
"And the engagement party. Ana, focus!" Mia says. "First we need a date so we can decide on a dress. Oh, and dad, can you call your friend at the Four Seasons to see if we can get a space there to throw the engagement party? Ana where are we going to have this wedding? Seattle or elsewhere?" And the chatter continues. Everyone throws questions at Ana at once, and no one waits for her to answer. They just continue to talk over each other.
Ana slips out of the sofa and walks outside, but nobody notices as they continue to argue wedding details.
I follow her outside and slip my arms around her. I lay my head on her chin as we both admire the view of the sound from my grandparents' patio.
She leans into me, but she doesn't speak.
"You okay, baby? Are they too much for you?"
"I'm fine. No. I love how excited they are, but I didn't expect them to throw so many questions at me all at once. I've been so happy celebrating our engagement that I haven't given the wedding much thought." I hear her sigh, and I know that there's more to it than that.
"If you're serious about eloping, we can be married tomorrow." I mean it.
"That sounds very appealing. I just don't know if I can-," she pauses as if she's searching for her next words. "Never mind."
"If you can what?" I turn her around to look at me. "What is it?" Whatever it is, I know she's not having second thoughts about marrying me.
"If I can be Mrs. Grey. I don't know if you know this, but you're kind of a big deal. Everyone in there is talking about couture wedding dresses and naming designers I've never even heard of. An engagement party at the Four Seasons. Social events. A press release about our engagement. I'll probably have to be on boards and run charities. All of those things will be expected of me." I start to speak but she puts her fingers on my lips to silence me. "And I want to do those things, I really do. I want to make you so proud of me, but I don't know how to do them. I've always been happy in my own skin and with who I am, but now I feel like I'm going to embarrass you somehow."
I pull her close and envelope her in my arms.
"You can never embarrass me, and your role as my wife can be whatever you want it to be. I never gave a damn about what's expected of me, and I would never want to force you to do anything you're not comfortable with."
"You don't understand. I want to do those things and I want to be comfortable doing them. I just don't know how to do them or where I'd even start. It sounds stupid when I say it out loud," she says, exasperated. "Maybe there's a course I can sign up for at WSU. How to be a high society wife." She starts to laugh, but I'm not sure the laughter is genuine.
"Are you serious about eloping?" I ask. Maybe she's just nervous about planning a wedding.
"What do you want? It's going to be your wedding too."
"I want whatever will make you happy, but I would love to stand at the altar and watch you walk towards me in a wedding gown. I'd want us to write our own vows and say them in front of our family and friends. I want a first dance as husband and wife. I want to hear whatever ridiculous speech Elliot will give. I want to feed you wedding cake and champagne before I whisk you off to our honeymoon. That's what I want." I lean down and give her a peck on the lips.
"Then that's what we'll have. I want those things too."
"You can get as many wedding planners as you want. My grandmother will help. She practically planned Shana's wedding on her own. Mia, Kate, Shana and Jose will help as well. Grace is so desperate to make amends she'd do whatever-,"
"Stop. I don't want to talk about your mother, but I'd love to have everyone else help."
"Fair enough. What else? I know there's more."
"It's nothing," she says.
"Don't do that, Ana. We promised each other open communication."
"I just felt so alone in there."
"What?" I ask, dumfounded and a little hurt.
"Let me explain. I love how excited everyone is for us. Can you imagine how crazy your mom is going to get when Mia gets engaged? All the planning and time your mom will dedicate to her. I wish I had that. I miss having a mom, Christian. The sad thing is, I don't even know if my mother would even want to be a part of this if she were still alive. She never had much interest in me before, but there's a part of me who likes to imagine. I have this fantasy in my head that if I'd agreed to have dinner with her that night, she'd still be here, and she'd be so excited about this and we would do all of the typical mother daughter things. I imagine us going dress shopping, even arguing when she wants me to get some ridiculous ball gown that will swallow me up. I picture her at the wedding making a fuss. It's silly given our history, but I wish I had that. And then I feel so selfish because I have you and all I can do is bitch and moan about what I don't have." She casts her eyes down and I tilt her chin, forcing her to look at me again. "I'm so happy, Christian. I love you so much. And I want you to stop doing that."
"Doing what?"
"Thinking about ways you can solve my problems. I don't want you to fix them, just to listen."
"You know me so well. I can't fix the Carla issue, but I think if she were still here, she'd be in my grandmother's living room fighting with the rest of our entourage. And as for the rest, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. You're perfect to me the way you are. If you don't ever want to be on any boards or head any charities, you don't have to. Since you said you want to, my grandmother will take you under her wing, but only if that's really what you want, not what you think I want. Okay?" I kiss the top of her head, both cheeks and finally her lips.
"Okay. I'm just being silly."
"No, you're not. Some wise ass once told me not to ever trivialize my feelings. I'm giving you the same advice."
She lays her head on my chest and we stand quietly for several minutes, just holding each other until we hear a throat clearing.
"Brunch is served." I turn around to see my mother standing there. She's eyeing Ana and I'm left wondering how much of our conversation she overheard.
"We'll be right there," I say to her.
"Hurry up. Jose and Mia are about to kill each other. They can't agree on where to have the wedding." Grace walks back inside and I look down at Ana, and we both start to laugh.
"Why is Mia acting like she's not on my shit list?" I ask Ana as I take her hand and lead her back inside.
"I've known Ana longer than you, Mia. She would not want to get married at a hotel, no matter how glitzy. She'd want something personal. Something that means something to her." Jose makes a good point about Ana. I tune Mia out as she goes on and on about the perks of getting married at the Ritz Carlton.
"He's got you there, Mia," Ray says.
I need to take control of this now.
"Enough, Mia. Baby, when do you want to do this? I don't want to wait, so it will have to be soon."
"Um, summer?"
"Nope. Not waiting that long. And I'm not waiting until spring either."
"Winter wonderland! It will be so beautiful." Everyone else agrees as they start another conversation about a winter wedding.
"Winter wonderland it is. Let's eat. We can talk wedding later. Shana, can you give us the name of your wedding planner? Grandma, you're in charge of keeping the wedding planner in check."
"I want to be in charge of helping Ana pick out a dress," Jose chimes in. Shana, Mia and Kate all jump on board.
"Where, kids?" Carrick asks, and I look to Ana.
"We fell in love in Seattle so I want to have it here." Everyone else is in agreement, not that it matters.
"You'll have to decide on caterers. If you use my wedding planner, she can make some incredible recommendations."
"I'd like to help with that, if I may. I know some wonderful local caterers and I can help find a location in Seattle for the ceremony. We can set tents on our property. There are so many things we can do for a winter wedding." The room is filled with silence as everyone looks from Ana to Grace, waiting for an answer.
"Listen, Dr. Trevelyan," Ana begins, but Grace talks over her.
"Please. I'd really like to do this."
A/N: I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Our couple is on their way to that HEA, and Grace actually reached out to Jose and invited him to brunch! Thank you guys for sticking with me throughout this story. More coming up soon. Laters!