CONTENT WARNING: There is some BRIEF, NON-CONSENSUAL-ISH STUFF, this chapter. If that sort of thing bothers you, you may not want to read...

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Chapter 26

Barry stood by his bed, stretching, yawning. He sighed and blinked. He was reaching up to release the clasps on his tunic, when he heard the door open. Alarmed, he spun around, halting when he spotted Eobard. The alarm he felt only somewhat lessened, and he dropped his hands, trying to ignore the adrenaline that flowed through him, that increased his heartbeat.

He cleared his throat pointedly and asked with irritation, "just because of earlier, now you think you can make a habit of barging unannounced into my room whenever you want?"

"Why not?" Eobard replied. The auto-door slid close behind him.

"It's rude."

"Come on, Barry. This kind of night has nothing to do with being well-mannered."

Barry exhaled. He had a good idea of why the other was here - what he wanted. "Well," he started, "I suppose we were bound to have this conversation sooner or later." He folded his arms.

"Actually, I don't think there's much to discuss."

"Actually, there is. I think we both have very different ideas of what is going on between us, right now."

"Really?" Eobard took a step forward, a small frown on his face.

"Really. I had no intentions of taking things this fast, but apparently you did. The only reason you'd come here, at this time of the night, and the way you've been staring at me since I got home, the way you're talking… You want sex, right?"

"I thought that went unspoken," Eobard said, furrowing his brows with confusion. "Come on, Allen. Don't tell me that that's not what you want." He took another step. "I'm not blind. I've seen the way you've been looking at me, too, you know."

Barry jutted his chin. "One thing you'll learn about me, Thawne, is that I'm greedy when it comes to...intimacy. I think I want more than sex."

The Reverse let out an impatient sigh. "Of course you do. And what more do you want? Cuddling? Because that is a serious no."

Barry opened his mouth.

Eobard cut in before he uttered a sound, "Actually, before you say it, let me give you a word from the wise; be careful what you wish for."

"It's simple. I don't want to rush this. I want to take it slow - I want to savor it, to work up to the bed part - you know, get a feel of...this. Of us."

Eobard shook his head slightly, once again taking another step. "I don't understand. Tell me why," he demanded, closing the final distance between them. "I think we've wasted enough time, as it is."

"It's not time wasted."

"Yes, it is."

"Every moment changes this, for better or worse."

"No, it doesn't. Stop deluding yourself to ease your conscious. You know this is exactly what you want."

Barry could feel his tension, his agitation. He knew this wasn't going to be easy and not just because Eobard was going to be stubborn, but because he himself almost regretted what he knew he was about to say. "Look," he replied, "this is…" He sighed, struggling to find a way to explain, to get it through to the other. "You need to understand... I haven't had this interest in anybody for a long time. I'm just not ready to rush into this. I haven't even sorted out what this is between us, yet, and I need time to do that."

"Then let me help you; it's called lust, Barry..."

"What if it's more than that?"

"It's not..." There was an irritated sigh. "You know, I thought perhaps you would've grown up a bit, but apparently you're still the hopeless romantic I remember from the twenty-first century."

Barry bristled. "I'd be one hell of an idiot, Thawne, to even consider that," he growled. "I know this definitely is not love, and I'm certainly not expecting any romance... I just don't want to be mistaken when trying to pursue this...relationship."

The Reverse gave a derisive snort. "It is not a relationship."

"Whatever... But I do know that it's more than lust. I know what lust feels like, and this is...well, more... Maybe it's the Speed Force, or our history, or...I don't know...but...I think we'll both regret it if we do this now, and it turns out I'm right… Put simply - I just need a way out in case it is more. I think you need one, too. That's why I want to take this slowly."

His reverse stared at him for several long moments, expression giving nothing away. "You worry too much," Eobard said at last. He put a finger under Barry's chin, stroking a rhythm against his skin. "Nothing we do tonight will be set in stone… You'll be able to run away from this later, if you really want to… You'll have your way out, because I'll hold you to nothing..."

"It's not about you... What if I can't give myself an out," Barry whispered. "What if I get attached? Because if I do, I will have to put up with that added pain for the rest of my life, on top of everything else already inside of me."

Eobard shifted, dropping his arm. "You won't grow attached." He sound certain. "I'm your worst enemy... You hate me... I've contributed to so much of the hell in your life, there's no way you'd develop real feelings for me... And I know you haven't done this in a while, so let me remind you - it's really not that complicated or hard... And if - and I emphasize the if - this is more, like you say, I don't really care. Because all I want right now, is you."

"And just how much of me are we talking about?" Barry shot back, stubborn, refusing to budge, in spite of the warmth and desire pooling in his stomach. "You're just wanting a quick fix, right? Nothing more, nothing less?"

"I wouldn't say quick...maybe semi-fast. Fine. As slow as I might manage, if that's your thing." Eobard shifted his hands, gripping the other's waist. He pressed him back against the wall. "Can we stop talking now?"

Barry saw the other speedster's surprise when he shoved him back. "No, we can't. Even if I don't figure this out, I'm going to have to at least trust you enough. Not just with my body, but to not kill me afterward, and I can't. Not yet. Not with the way things are standing at the moment, Thawne."

The other gave a frustrated sigh. "You shouldn't ever trust me, Barry."

"And yet you saved my life. Got angry about my almost-demise."

"Knowing that, why do you think I might kill you?"

"Because I'd be surrendered to you - maybe in every way possible...or in every way that mattered... Perhaps you'd humiliate me, then feel inclined to end me afterward. I know there are moments where you can barely control your desire to kill me, truce or no truce."

"That's what this is about." Eobard scrunched his brows in realization. "You're frightened of being that vulnerable to me."

"...Yes."

"Then why did you say you wanted me, that you were done being scared?"

"Because I had hoped you could be patient with me, while I worked through all this. Just because I said I was done being scared, doesn't mean I can overcome that fear in less than a day..."

"Barry, I'm not going to humiliate or kill you if we do this."

"And I'm supposed to just take your word for it?"

Eobard ran a hand through his hair. "I'm guessing you won't... You know, if you ever thought this was about more than carnal pleasure, you should never have said you wanted to give this a try... This doesn't have to be as complicated as you're trying to make it. We desire each other. Maybe it is because we're speedsters, or because we're crazy, or we see something we like. It doesn't matter."

"It does matter."

Thawne scowled. "Allen, the longer we deny our lust, the worse it'll get. Let's just forget everything tonight - everything between us, your fear, our battle, our hatred... Because I'm not looking for a relationship with you."

"So you just want sex...whenever?" Barry shook his head. "What, enemies-with-benefits? If so, then you shouldn't have kissed me that night. You should've known I'm not the type to just jump into this kind of thing blind." He exhaled. "I guess we really are reversed, aren't we?" He laughed in disbelief. "We can't even agree on what the hell our desire amounts to and what to do with it."

Eobard chortled, too. "Yeah, I'll just go ahead and admit it - I don't even understand why we're still arguing about this anymore. So, please, let's stop thinking about it - stop reading too much into it. I know, without a doubt, that we both want this, so damn everything else and let me make you scream tonight, let me take you to those heights, let me erase our differences tonight. Nothing more, nothing less. We'll let it end there, if you must, but neither of us can escape this need. Right. Now." His gaze flicked across Barry, and the Flash swore it was with a certain desperation.

Barry reached forward and gripped his hand, causing the other to look straight into his eyes. "I...wish I could say yes...but I know I cannot. I just can't. Not yet...but with time... If you'll give me a chance..."

Reverse Flash narrowed his eyes, a flicker of red racing across them. "So, that's it, huh? You'll just turn me away, after everything you said earlier about wanting to be with me?"

"I'm sorry."

Eobard hesitated, eyes darkening. His jaw clenched. "You know, Flash...there's this not-so-little part in me that wants to just quit asking for your damned permission," he almost purred, "because we both know in that turn of events, you'll come to your senses."

"You could," Flash replied, voice cold, "if that's the kind of dynamic you want between us...but I know that you don't. If you did, you would have done it already, before I ever agreed to anything…because I know you've been eyeing me for awhile. Whatever else you are, you aren't that awful."

Eobard stared, warring emotions in his eyes. "You always tempt me to be my worst."

Barry said with abrupt understanding, "this is all a challenge to you, isn't it? And if so..." He thought carefully. "Then this is going to be a game of give and take, isn't it? Then you'll give as much as I do… Sorry. There's my terms. That's my thing. If you want sex, then give me time to figure out what I want in return."

Barry felt the hand he held tense, grip tightening.

"Eobard, what are you willing to give?"

Thawne stared at him, eyes hard, glittering with red electricity. "...I think you want me to fuck you, Allen, even as you pretend otherwise. The only reason we waited this long, is because you kept pretending you didn't want this. Now, I know better. Earlier, you said you wanted to be with me…and so, you will."

Eobard grabbed his shoulders and slammed him against the wall, lips on his. All of his weight was behind the action, and Barry felt a simultaneous ache and thrill run through his being. He struggled to breath through his nose, heart pounding. Perhaps he had misread the other and he was more than willing to go through with his threat. Despite his own fear and uncertainty, he still found himself having to resist the urge to reciprocate to the other's touch...

Or punch him.

But he had to end this without a fight, or things would get even worse between them.

"Never underestimate me," Eobard growled on his jaw when he broke the kiss. He bit at his neck. Barry groaned. "I'm going to make you mine, tonight, Flash. And I know you will enjoy every second."

Barry summoned every last ounce of willpower. "Stop this... I know you don't want it like this."

Eobard pulled back, eyes wild. "You don't know anything about me, Flash. You never did. You never will." He leaned back in and bit harder than before. Barry winced. Hands slid under his shirt, feeling along his back. Unforgiving fingers dug into the skin on his shoulders with bruising force. Barry leaned his head back against the wall, groaning, trying not to relent to the other. He shivered, crushing his eyelids together.

"Eobard... I know you're better than this..."

The Reverse Flash leaned up, pressing lips to the Flash's ear. A strong, calloused hand slid up his chest and wrapped around his throat, locking like a vise there. Barry went rigid, feeling an ache in his torso at the elbow digging against his ribs. Eobard was a mass of steel against his body, pinning him there against the wall. "Goddamn you, Bartholomew Allen," he whispered, breath warm. "I hate you. Why do you have to be so damned stubborn? You can't loosen up for even one damned night."

Barry opened his eyes, meeting the other's angry gaze with defiance.

Thawne released his hold. He jerked back, spun on his heel, and stormed out of the room without another word.

Barry gasped, sagging back in relief. He felt worn. He forced his breathing to even out, trying to calm his racing heart. He'd played with fire. Had Thawne not stopped, the situation could have devolved into a very nasty fight...but somehow, it hadn't come to that. Eobard had shown him tonight that he wasn't willing to go past the point of no return for what he wanted.

So much for nothing standing between what they wanted anymore, Eobard thought in irritation.

To say he was frustrated was a huge understatement. Even after Barry had admitted his feelings, he was still resisting them, and it felt very much like what the Reverse imagined dragging a stubborn mule up a mountainside would be like, with it constantly stopping, snorting and hollering before relenting another step or two, all while Eobard pulled and pulled on its lead to no avail.

I'm an idiot - such an idiot to expect any different.

He didn't know why, but somehow, he'd thought his touch would unwind the man, to make him unable to resist this any longer. And, damn, would it have really been so horrible to take him then? It was so blindingly obvious that Barry wanted this… But even in his lust-haze and agitation, he knew better. If Barry didn't consent, then he couldn't take...not this, anyway. Murder was one thing, but this was something else entirely. Even he had boundaries, though he hadn't really wanted Barry to know they existed at all.

He supposed he'd just have to try harder to make Barry more comfortable with the entire situation, to assuage his fears in being vulnerable, to find out what the other wanted in return.

This was becoming very trying, almost on a ridiculous level, but he was too invested now to give up on it. He wanted it. He needed it.