Hope you guys have all had great holidays, gotten fat and wanted to rip your ears out to get rid of the Christmas Jingles, I know I have :D Btw with the little Italian phrase, I don't speak Italian, but Google and I are friends ;)

They had taken to sitting on the couch to watch a movie, much alike when they used to, but something had changed; they were no longer sitting at opposite ends of the couch like friends, they were leaning into each other, Ziva resting her head on Tony's shoulder, his arm draped across her neck. Finally able to take comfort in each other. Tony couldn't believe that the woman who he had had a crush on for years, a crush he would never had have admitted to liked him back. For a while he wasn't even sure he did love her, why did it have to take her being captured and tortured for him to realise? He hadn't noticed she was dozing, leaning on him until she stirred.

"If you want we can go to bed Zee-Vah," Tony suggested.

She stiffened, "Tony, I cannot do that yet I-"

Tony slid out from under her, "God no I didn't mean that! I just noticed you seem to have less nightmares when I'm around," He stated sheepishly.

Ziva smiled, "You know how in yourself you sound?" She replied, glancing at him.

"Up yourself, not in yourself, that's just weird," He joked, stretching an arm he had forgotten was around her, he stood, offering his hand to help Ziva stand.

For the first time since she got back she took it, Tony jumping around a little on the inside, he led her into his bedroom, both standing in opposite corners to get changed. Tony accidentally saw her back though. It was still heavily marred, but many of the scars had faded, only there was still redness around the Arabic that was scrawled into her. Tony felt his stomach churn slightly at what those animals had done to her. She pulled her top down and spun around, catching him staring, hatred shining in his eyes.

"Tony-" She began slowly, gently.

He shook his head, "No Ziva don't, that still hurts doesn't it?" He asked sharply, expecting an answer.

She went over to him, standing less than an arms length away she stated, "Only sometimes, you can't do anything about it Tony," Her eyes fell from his.

"But that's the thing! I could've done something! I could've found you earlier, could've stopped you from leaving, could've said something!" His voice rose with anger, "But I didn't! I killed your boyfriend then let you go!" He sunk into a sitting position on the bed, tears refusing to stay in his eyes.

Ziva didn't know what to do, she had been relying on others for her strength when she had none, now she had to support others. She sat with him, puling him in close, muttering comforting phrases in Hebrew, realising he couldn't understand she added, "Non รจ colpa tua," It's not your fault.

Eventually he had dried his tears, they lay in bed, mulling over their most recent discovery. Love. The sensation felt foreign to Ziva, sure she had cared for the Michael, but this was different, she was more sure of herself. She wasn't slowly getting to know someone and then deciding she loved them. She hadn't even reached the stage of love with Rivkin, she had with Tony. She hadn't felt loved by someone since Tali had died. It seemed that after her death Eli's shallow pool of compassion dried entirely. Their hands slowly intertwined, she glanced at Tony, he wasn't looking at her but had a smirk that wouldn't leave his face. He looked as if he had accomplished something massive, Ziva supposed he had. She wouldn't admit it but she had craved this feeling for years, burying it in her work and string of lovers until she had all but forgotten about it. She stared at the ceiling, lit only by the light in the hallway, as she still couldn't handle complete darkness, lost deep in the remnants of her past.

"Ziva?" A soft voice broke through and she blinked away the memories.

Not moving she answered, "Yeah."

There was a paused, "I was thinking, DC, it's so depressing, we should go somewhere, on holiday." He sighed, "I know I could use a break."

"Where would we go?" Ziva asked, knowing that the idea from any other man would have been an implication of a sexual weekend away, she shuddered at the notion.

"There is a DiNozzo family cabin out near the lakes, I used to go there as a kid, it's really beautiful," He smiled at the memories, "You can go fishing, canoeing, hiking, all that outdoorsy stuff that I know you love." He rolled over and propped himself on one elbow, twirling one of Ziva's curls in his free hand.

Ziva's eyes darted back and forth as she thought over it, mulling over any possible risks of a flash back, which always resulted in a panic attack. She hated them more than anything, there was no way she was in control of herself when having one. "How open is the cabin?" She asked quietly.

"Open meaning?" Tony replied.

She sighed, "Lot's of rooms?Joint kitchen and living room? That sort of thing," She stated quickly, slightly embarrassed.

"Oh, it's fine, two bedrooms, one bathroom, joint living room and what you could call a kitchen, more of a open fire to have barbecues and stuff," He grinned. "So what do you think?"

She looked at him for the first time, smiling, "As long as you're the one who asks Gibbs."

NCIS

"You're going where?!"

Tony sighed, he knew it wouldn't be easy for the bossman to agree, "It's called a holiday Gibbs, it's what normal people do, believe me Ziva wants to be normal."

"Where, with who, how long?" Gibbs asked sharply, not hiding his protectiveness over his daughter.

"Near Deep Creek Lake, there is a old DiNozzo cabin I used to stay in when I was little," He smiled, seeing the serious expression he was faced with he added, "Just us two, five, six days max."

Gibbs took a deep swig of his coffee, "Phone reception?"

Tony shrugged, "It's average, but there's a landline."

"Number?" He asked, quickly scrawling down the number on a piece of paper. His eyes met Tony's, a deep connection passing through them, "You take care of her DiNozzo, no funny business."

Tony held up his hands in mock innocence, "Wouldn't dream of it, my, I mean our ninja would kick my ass!" He grinned, trying to hide his slip up, hoping Gibbs didn't notice.

He got a quick nod in return, he spun around and headed for the elevator, followed by, "Rule 12 DiNozzo."

Sorry that took so long, I went on holiday and then New Years has crept up on me! Argh life! Anyways big thanks to a guest reviewer who gave me the idea of a wee holiday! Have a good New Years!