Monster

by ShayP

Shiznat/AU Natsuki Kuga is running away from an abusive home. She finds herself at Garderobe Military Academy where she meets her teacher, Shizuru, her rival, Tomoe, and her friend, Nao. She can only pray her past doesn't come back to haunt her.

26. Take Me Away

Chapter 26: Take Me Away

So writing this chapter (over and over again) sort of felt similar to stubbing your toe on something. Repeatedly.

Man, posting this chapter was the most stressful thing ever… as was writing it. Sorry for its lateness. Once again, thank you for taking the time to review and keeping Monster alive. That being said, I am so sorry for what I'm about to do to you. Heh…

Take a deep breath. Hold it. Hold it. Okay. Let it out. Feel Ready?

Oh, and the title comes from the song 'Take Me Away' by the Plain White T's. Hate them, but I do like that song.

Enjoy?

---

If we deny love that is given to us, if we refuse to give love because we fear pain or loss, then our lives will be empty, our loss greater.

---

Nao was woken up by the sounds of drawers being violently pulled out. "What the hell, Kuga?" Nao hissed into the darkness as she scrambled to get out of bed. She could sense the panic in the room, could feel Natsuki's out of whack emotions from under her goddamn covers. Her feet hit the floor and she watched Natsuki from beside her bed. Natsuki turned to look at her, but she wasn't seeing anything. Nao's eyes widened. "Are you okay? The fuck happened to you?" Pissed. Very pissed, Natsuki. That's what you look like right now.

Natsuki smiled. A sham of a smile, Nao thought. "Nothing," she said simply as she turned back to her wardrobe and pulled out her running shorts.

Nao, now standing, watched Natsuki silently. Natsuki pulled off her uniform, not caring that Nao was staring at her, and pulled on her running clothes.

The redhead strode forward and grabbed Natsuki's arm. "Hey," she growled, causing Natsuki to look at her. The look in Natsuki's eyes was so… off, but happy. Why was she so goddamned happy? It was one in the goddamn morning! She should be exhausted… she should be sleeping. That's what Nao had figured, that Natsuki was sleeping over at Shizuru's again. She probably slept better there, which would be good for the night before the match. "Natsuki…" Nao said, her gaze softening. "What the fuck are you doing?" She wanted to know.

"Going for a run," Natsuki replied, as if it were obvious. She began lacing up her sneakers. "You gonna come?" She asked calmly as she focused her attention on her purple running shoes.

"What? Are you nuts? It's freezing outside! At least go running in pants you psycho!" Nao, realizing Natsuki wasn't going to listen to her, quickly rushed to change into her uniform and then put on a jacket. Natsuki was already heading out the door. Nao scrambled to finish lacing up her boots before running after her best friend.

The night air hit Nao as an icy awakening. She shook her head and sprinted through the snow to catch up with Natsuki, who was taking long strides through the snow. "You have a fucking competition match tomorrow," Nao snarled as she finally caught up. She was walking side-by-side with Natsuki, whose eyes were staring straight ahead… on a destination Nao couldn't see.

Natsuki gave a nonchalant shrug. "I'm going to win it."

"Aren't we a little cocky tonight?" Nao grumbled. They reached the track, which wasn't covered in snow due to various runners during the day. Natsuki instantly leapt onto it and began running at top speed. Great, Nao growled as she too began running. This is exactly what I want to do at one in the morning.

"Kazuya is going to throw the match for me…" Natsuki explained when Nao managed to catch up to her. She glanced at Nao. "Isn't that great?" Natsuki said with a big smile. It didn't look quite right on her face.

The redhead stayed silent before she said, "Did Teach dump your ass or something?" Uh-oh… Nao thought when she saw the raw emotion in Natsuki's eyes. Maybe she shouldn't have said that.

Natsuki spun around and tackled Nao to the ground. Nao threw Natsuki off of her and then pounced, pinning Natsuki into the snow below. Natsuki, wearing only a T-shirt and running shorts, looked freezing as the snow sunk into the back of her shirt and surrounded her legs. "Get off of me!" Natsuki yelled. Nao's hands wrapped around her wrists and Natsuki almost expected it to burn. It didn't. She was stronger now. Touch was fine. Touching was fine. She exhaled slowly.

"No," Nao growled down to her friend, who was acting like a maniac. "Tell me what the fuck is going on," she demanded, her jaw tight.

Natsuki finally stopped struggling. Her body collapsed, exhausted, into the snow. Her eyes closed and for a second Nao wondered if she had accidently killed her somehow.

"Natsuki…" Nao whispered down to her friend. Those emeralds, always so goddamned bright, opened once more and peered upwards at the sky above. She often had that look months ago, when she'd wake herself up in the middle of the night from crying or whimpering. Nao would ask her quietly, 'Are you alright?' And Natsuki would look at her with those eyes and say, 'Course. Just a nightmare. Sorry for waking you up.'

Nao, who was straddling Natsuki's hips, let out a relieved sigh when Natsuki seemed to be done struggling. "Finished?" Nao asked, her tone one Natsuki had only heard once or twice before. It was caring, soft, concerned. Things Natsuki didn't want right now.

"I'm so incredibly fine that it's funny you should ask that," Natsuki replied as she chuckled darkly. "Now are you going to get off of me or are you going to kiss me?"

Nao's brow lifted and she slowly got off of Natsuki. "What happened?" She asked as she stood up and then held out a hand to Natsuki, her gaze softening.

Natsuki glanced warily at Nao's hand, not wanting anyone's help, anyone's kindness. She wasn't in the goddamned mood. She got up on her own. "Gah," she grumbled as she looked down at her soaking wet body. "I'm all wet now…" and numb. Very wet and numb. Old snow sucks. At least there wasn't that much now.

Nao stared at her and fought back the blush that threatened to form on her face. After all, Natsuki had just said she was wet. "Are you going to explain or not? Because this was the rudest awakening I've had in my entire life and I don't appreciate it."

"Do you think Alyssa is good in bed?" Natsuki asked suddenly, her eyes lifting to meet with Nao's. Her brow was furrowed slightly, as if she couldn't think of an answer. "I bet you she is."

The redhead had no idea what to say to that. Normally she'd say, 'Hell yeah, Alyssa Searrs is legendary.' But something told her saying that would be a very bad idea. Bad idea. Instead, Nao shrugged. "She's probably shitty. I mean, do you see how confident she is all the time? It's like she's overcompensating for something. Yeah, she's definitely lousy in bed."

Natsuki smirked. "Maybe you're right." She then wiped some snow off her leg and then, as if transfixed, stared at her hands. She brought them to her face and tilted her head.

"They're called hands," Nao's eyes narrowed. "Natsuki."

Natsuki lowered her hands and then began stretching, as if she were getting ready for a marathon. She spread out her legs and reached for her calf, held, then straightened and repeated. The blood was flowing so fast. She wanted to unwind. "So Alyssa is sleeping over at Shizuru's tonight," Natsuki said, her face as nonchalant as her tone. She acted as if she had just said the most normal thing in the world. She switched legs. "They make each other happy, you think?" She looked up to see Nao staring at her with wide eyes. Natsuki chuckled as she straightened. "What's wrong with you?" She asked, as if she found Nao's incredulous expression amusing.

Nao snapped out of it and shook her head slowly, her eyes filled with—dear God was that pity? "You can't be serious," she said after a moment. "Fujino wouldn't do that, Natsuki." Nao almost considered going along with this, she didn't much care for their teacher anyways. But no, Natsuki was clearly freaking out about it. "I'm serious, I don't even like the bitch but I know she wouldn't do that to you." A pause before, "I mean did you seriously see this happen? Or did your paranoid self get the better of you?"

Natsuki absentmindedly chewed on her lower lip as she met Nao's eyes. Eventually she said, "Ah…"

Nao let out a relieved sigh. "You didn't see anything, you're just nuts."

Natsuki, determined to prove Nao wrong, straightened and poked her finger into Nao's chest. "Shizuru told Alyssa she didn't have to worry because I knew her room was off-limits, then Alyssa asked what if I caught them the next morning and Shizuru told her I'd be too busy preparing for the competition. This was after Alyssa confessed that she was still in love with Shizuru, and that Shizuru should stop loving her student and should give Alyssa a chance." Natsuki, satisfied that she had proven her point, stopped poking now and folded her arms. Hearing herself say those things out loud made it all the more real. That had actually happened.

Nao, dumbfounded, had no idea what to say to that. That certainly seemed damned suspicious, even if Natsuki hadn't seen anything… "But… uh… how do you know they…?"

"Shizuru asked with one of those…" sexy, "voices if Alyssa would be sleeping over, so Alyssa said yes and asked if Shizuru wanted the lights off. Shizuru, who I could see was already in bed said yes. And I saw Alyssa flick off the lights. I heard foot steps but I turned and left at that point." Sleeping over probably did not mean 'sleeping' over. "Alyssa wasn't even supposed to be over, she had left for Fuuka earlier that day…" Natsuki added as she just remembered that other little fact. Alyssa was supposed to be gone.

"Uh…" No way. No fucking way. Fujino wouldn't… who would cheat on Natsuki? I mean yeah, I guess Searrs is hot as hell but… she looked at Natsuki, who was standing still, her head tilted up to look at the sky. "Okay, well, let's not jump to conclusions," Nao said quietly. She gently wrapped her hand in Natsuki's cold one. "Come on," the redhead urged as she dragged a dazed Natsuki away from the track. "You'll feel better in the morning."

Right.

Nao sighed when Natsuki remained unmoving in the center of their tent. "If you don't change your clothes, I'll change them for you," Nao growled. Natsuki smirked at her and began to pull off her soaking wet T-shirt… slowly. Nao swallowed. Unfair, unfair, unfair.

Natsuki flung it to the floor, too lazy to put it in her laundry bag, and then bent to the floor to pull off her sneakers. When that was done, she wiggled off her running shorts, which she also flung to the floor, next to her shirt. Emeralds turned slowly to the side. Nao was still leaning against her bed, shamelessly watching. For once, Natsuki didn't feel uncomfortable at all. Hell, Nao was allowed to fucking stare all she wanted if Alyssa was allowed to see Shizuru in her sexy nightgown. …Or in nothing.

The dark-haired teen sighed deeply before pulling on a big T-shirt and comfy pants that were much too big for her. "Nao," she said after a moment, her head slowly turning to meet the eyes of her roommate once more.

Nao looked guilty, as if she'd been 'caught' for only a few seconds before giving Natsuki a smile. "Yes?"

"Tomorrow… I'm going to need you."

Nao nodded. "I'll call Mai. And Chie too. They've missed you."

Natsuki smiled and got into her bed. She dug her head under her pillow and stayed there, silently listening to the wind outside.

---

The next morning, Shizuru was sitting on the front of her desk, her arms folded over her chest as she flashed her students a brilliant smile. She had had a great night last night.

The only two who hadn't shown up yet were Natsuki and Nao. That bothered Shizuru a bit, as it did the first time Natsuki and Nao cut class together. Really though, why did it always have to be Nao? Then again, Shizuru had no right to be jealous… after all, what she had done with Alyssa…

Never mind that, she thought though an annoying blush appeared on her cheeks, if only for a second. She partly hated herself for it.

Speak of the devils, the teacher thought as she turned her attention to the door, which opened to reveal the two missing students. Nao walked right in, but not before casting Shizuru the dirtiest glare the woman had ever received from the redhead. Natsuki strode in right after Nao, though she smiled at Shizuru instead.

Shizuru blinked. What an odd smile. It almost felt nostalgic. Like… like the kind of smile Natsuki would give her when she was trying to convince Shizuru not to worry about her.

Red eyes locked on Natsuki's form. The girl didn't even look at her. Instead, Natsuki had opted for staring outside the window, her elbow propped on her desk and her cheek resting in her palm. Shizuru stared a few seconds longer and then turned to the class.

"Good morning, class," she said, though she sounded uneasy to everyone, save Natsuki, who wasn't really listening. "You are all dismissed to the arena, except for the two competitors." She watched as the class got all their stuff together and shuffled out of the classroom, except for Natsuki and Tomoe… and Nao?

Shizuru turned her gaze towards Nao and raised a sleek brow. "Private Yuuki? Did you join the competition without my knowing?" She asked, a small smile forming on her lips when the redhead shot her a glare.

"I can walk with Natsuki to the arena," Nao argued as she stood up. Natsuki stood up as well and stretched her neck this way and that. A habit she was picking up from Nabatame?

"No you cannot. In fact, I'd like to have a word with Private Kuga." Shizuru turned to Tomoe and offered her a fake smile. "Will you be alright escorting Private Yuuki to the arena like the rest of her classmates?" Shizuru asked sweetly.

Tomoe frowned only slightly before nodding. She glanced at Nao. "Come on, I have a match to win and you're holding me up."

Nao looked back at Natsuki, who gave her a small nod. Nao huffed, gave Shizuru a warning glare, and then stalked towards the exit, Tomoe following behind.

The door shut behind them and for a few awkward seconds there was silence.

Shizuru stood up off her desk and faced her student, her eyes meeting blank emeralds. "Natsuki," she called quietly, her voice like honey that Natsuki wanted to drown in. "Come here."

Natsuki, who normally would've been tripping over air in her haste to get to her teacher, stood where she was. After she seemed to think something over, she walked towards Shizuru and then stopped a few feet away.

This can't happen, this can't happen. Just being near her hurts. Indeed, little tremors spread through her arms to her fingers, feeling like tiny pinches from the inside out. Those eyes, they were full of love and adoration yet Natsuki couldn't be sure. She wasn't goddamned sure what she had seen last night, and Shizuru certainly seemed to be the same woman Natsuki had known… if a bit more tired than usual. Then again, if what happened last night happened then… why WOULDN'T Shizuru be tired?

Shizuru swallowed hard and slowly extended her arm towards Natsuki, her hand gently cupping her student's face.

Natsuki flinched only slightly, expecting for some reason that the touch would hurt. But of course not, the skin thing was long behind her, and Shizuru's touch had never hurt her. Nevertheless, Natsuki pulled away from Shizuru's hand. Her own hand came up to cover her cheek and her feet were sure to put a good few feet between her and her teacher.

Shizuru's eyes widened and her entire body froze. Shocked crimson met with fierce emeralds. The girl looked angry, as if Shizuru had no right to touch her so gently, so affectionately. "Natsuki," the teacher's tone was alarmed, her eyes confused. "What happened?" Why do you pull away from me?

Natsuki shook her head and offered Shizuru a smile as she waited with her own palm to her cheek until it slid off and fell to her side. "I'm fine," she said. "I just had a nightmare last night and I guess I'm just jumpy," she explained it away. That much was true. She had had a nightmare. The fact that Shizuru seemed worried gave Natsuki a perverse kind of pleasure. She still cared. Good sign.

Shizuru was still shell-shocked. Being denied access to Natsuki was a blow she hadn't been ready to handle. The fact that something within the own girl's mind could keep them apart terrified her. "What was your dream about?" She asked after swallowing, her throat feeling as dry as a desert. She still did not fully believe Natsuki about the nightmare, nor was she able to get the image of Natsuki flinching away out of her head.

Natsuki, looking at the clock on the wall and, realizing Shizuru would be late, shook her head and headed for the exit. "I dreamt Akio turned into you," she called over her shoulder as she opened the door and walked out.

---

Akio's maniacal laughter rang through Shizuru's head, his viridian eyes finally meeting hers to deliver those hateful words. "You think you're better than me?" His eyes flashed dangerously, the corner of his mouth being pulled up in a devilish smirk.

"You ARE me."

---

Shizuru walked silently behind Natsuki, who was taking wide steps and thus was far ahead of Shizuru. Usually they walked side-by-side, but neither was really in the mood now. Natsuki was confused as all hell. She wasn't sure whether to be pissed at Shizuru, who she wasn't even sure actually betrayed her with Alyssa, or to just slowly… slowly pull away from Shizuru so that Shizuru could see she would be fine on her own and didn't need Shizuru to babysit her. She wanted Shizuru to live her life, to be happy… Natsuki didn't want to stand in the way of that. She didn't want her savior to suffer just because she had done just that: saved Natsuki.

But I really want to kick the shit out of something. Man, I need a punching bag. I sort of wish Kazuya wasn't throwing the match… I could really deliver a good beat down right about now.

Shizuru on the other hand was torn. She wanted to run up to Natsuki and coddle her, tell her that no matter what, she would always be there for her. But those words rang in her head like the sirens of a passing ambulance: loud, annoying, growling for attention.

I'm not like you. How DARE you compare me to the likes of you?

And yet Natsuki's subconscious, because Shizuru did believe your dreams meant something, was telling her exactly that, that Shizuru was no better than Akio. Why did those words bother her so much?

Akio had hurt Natsuki in indescribable ways. Natsuki would never be the same, changed for life, but she was working through it. She was happy now, wasn't she? That man was probably pushed far back into the darkest recesses of the student's mind. He had left his scars, and Shizuru was doing her best to make them disappear… at least to some extent. Shizuru would never hurt Natsuki, not intentionally… so why the comparison? Why would the most terrifying person in Natsuki's life transform into the most loving? What does a nightmare like this mean?

Is she afraid of me hurting her? How? Why?

Perhaps I am looking too much into this… dreams sometimes mean nothing, Shizuru thought as she watched the back of her student stop just outside the door to the inner-arena. Shizuru stopped a few feet away. Natsuki turned around, giving Shizuru a curt nod and a salute before she began to open the metal door.

"So you're just going to go in then?" Shizuru asked quietly, not sure why Natsuki was acting so distant. Was it because of the nightmare?

Natsuki blinked as she turned to look at Shizuru, as if she had forgotten a daily ritual. "Oh. I'll see you after the match," Natsuki said with a forced smile. She suddenly saw, in her mind's eye, Alyssa grinning at Shizuru, Shizuru reassuring Alyssa that Natsuki wouldn't find out about them. Her eyes narrowed. "Unless you're busy," she added, her tone void of all emotion.

Shizuru damn near whimpered at the look she was getting from Natsuki. "I'm never busy when it comes to you, you know that," she replied, her voice losing all its strength.

And despite not wanting to, Natsuki smiled. Warmth filled her chest, if only for a second, and a familiar twinkle found it's way to her eyes. Shizuru's heart leapt at the sight, maybe Natsuki was okay?

But can I believe you? Natsuki suddenly wondered, and the warmth she had felt blew away with the light breeze. "Kazuya's going to throw the match," she said after a moment. "So you… don't have to worry… in case you were."

Shizuru's eyes widened. "He… what?" She asked in surprise. Natsuki knew she was going up against Kazuya? Who told her? Wait, he was going to let her win? Could she trust that he'd keep his word and wasn't just saying that so that she wouldn't be expecting anything?

Natsuki couldn't help but smile at the look on Shizuru's face. It was so relieved yet surprised. "He's too chicken shit to fight Tomoe, and I think he knows Akane is going to get her ass kicked… and he loves her, so he wants to be around to take care of her," Natsuki explained. Her arms folded over her chest as she eyed Shizuru with the look of a scientist: examining, calculating… wanting to know the answers.

Shizuru was silent for a moment. Holy shit. That meant Natsuki was going to the finals… most likely against Tomoe since Akane would probably lose. Tomoe's reputation was half her weapon. The more afraid you were of her, the quicker she would take you down. Because of Tomoe's age, the older students tended to underestimate her as well.

Am I happy about this or terrified? Shizuru wondered as her mind refused to think about something else not involving Natsuki's death.

Natsuki, not waiting to hear what Shizuru had to say, disappeared into the under belly of the arena without another word.

Shizuru stared at the door as her thoughts raged on. Natsuki made it to the final match. That was great, that's what she had been working towards this entire time! Shizuru knew Natsuki could do it, knew Natsuki had the talent, the strength, the heart. The fact that Natsuki still wanted to win also meant that whatever issues she was having right now, were not permanent… she still wanted to be with Shizuru. That was why she was competing right? To be with me?

But then there's the fact that she either gets badly harmed by Tomoe, and Shizuru wouldn't put it past Tomoe to try and kill Natsuki "by accident" or Natsuki will beat Tomoe and then die on the mission with Shizuru.

Either way, Natsuki was dead.

I won't allow it, The Kyoto-woman thought as she headed towards the spectator's booth, her mind racing.

---

Okay, that had been torture. Seeing Shizuru and pretending that everything was all right was all wrong. Just being around Shizuru made Natsuki feel odd. Shizuru still acted like she loved Natsuki.

Because she does love me, Natsuki growled in her head as she shoved her bag to the back of her locker. She does, so does this mean she just loves Alyssa more? It wouldn't be surprising. After all, they had been friends forever, not to mention lovers. Alyssa had been with Shizuru… in ways Natsuki never knew. Shizuru wasn't the kind of woman to just do that with anyone, no matter how flirtatious she naturally was.

The thought made Natsuki's skin crawl, and she almost wished she had time to take a really long, steaming hot shower to wash away all the fogginess that was threatening to deter her attention from what was important: the upcoming match.

Natsuki made her way to where Tomoe already was, staring at the slip of paper tacked to the usual bulletin board. Hearing footsteps behind her, Tomoe turned.

"I'm up," she said with a small smile. "You know what this means?"

Natsuki, ignoring her, read the paper as well.

Today's Matches:

Tomoe Marguerite (Private First Class, First Year) vs. Akane Higurashi (Private, Third Year)

Natsuki Kuga (Private, First Year) vs. Kazuya Krau (Private, Third Year)

"It means," Tomoe continued, annoyed that Natsuki wasn't even looking at her, "That I'm about to make it to the finals, scared?"

Natsuki glanced briefly at Tomoe before turning and walking towards the locker room.

"Hey!" Tomoe yelled after her. Natsuki kept walking with a small, satisfied smile on her face. "Don't walk away when I'm talking to yo—"

"Attention competitors. Will Private First Class Tomoe Marguerite head to entry ramp number two and Private Akane Higurashi to entry ramp number one."

Natsuki made it to the locker room. She let out a shaky breath and collapsed onto the wooden bench, her face instantly falling into her palms as she propped her elbows on her knees. Another shaky breath.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Grrr.

How the hell could she win a match like this? Oh right, Kazuya was throwing it for her. Thank god, she thought, I wouldn't be able to win ANYTHING in this condition. She wanted to be angry, to be REALLY angry, and yet would it be fair of her to feel angry when she wasn't sure anything was going on in the first place? Wrong or not, Natsuki was feeling the anger within becoming more and more intense as she thought about what she had seen last night. Alyssa was so goddamned dead.

"Hey, Kuga," Nabatame said as she peeked her head through the door leading back into the main area of the under-arena. She blinked when Natsuki looked up. The girl looked like hell. The third year then took a step in and sauntered over. "You look like hell," she informed.

"Very observant of you," Natsuki grumbled as she offered the third year a weak smile. She lowered her hands to her lap and straightened her position a bit so she didn't look so slouched. "What are you doing down here? Shouldn't you be watching?"

Nabatame shrugged and took a seat beside Natsuki. "Nope. Tomoe is totally going to win, so what's the point in watching, ya know?"

Natsuki made the 'you've-got-a-point' face. "So I guess Akane is already getting her ass handed to her?"

Nabatame reached into her pocket and slid out her cell phone. "Sasaki texts me updates of the match… but yeah I don't see the point in watching when everyone already knows the outcome."

"You seem awfully sure Akane is going to lose…"

"She will," Nabatame said seriously. "The kind of raw talent Tomoe has? It's rare… and Garderobe merely cultivated it into what it is today. Akane is one of the best but her skills are all from training, no talent. With talent you get an upper-edge." She winked at Natsuki. "Like you. You and me. We're talented."

Natsuki grinned devilishly. She had to agree, she had a talent for kicking ass. Natsuki looked away from Nabatame and instead focused on the locker across from them. Despite Nabatame's eyes being a different shade than Alyssa's, they were still blue, and Natsuki wasn't in the mood to look into blue eyes.

"Besides," Nabatame added when Natsuki didn't say anything more, "Akane and Kazuya have something going on, so her spirit probably won't be in this fight… she doesn't want to fight her own boyfriend in the final, not to mention she doesn't want to leave him to go on a mission if she wins. No. Her mind tells her she wants it but her heart doesn't." Nabatame pointed to her heart. "You fight with this and nothing can defeat you."

Natsuki chuckled a bit and gave her friend a sidelong glance. "Now you're just being corny." She figured Nabatame didn't know about Kazuya throwing the match. I'll tell her in a bit.

"It's true though," Nabatame argued with a playful grin. "If your heart's not in it, what's the point?"

"Would you like some fries with that cheese?" Natsuki asked, both her brows lifting as Nabatame gave a small pout.

"I'm serious!"

Natsuki snickered and then looked up thoughtfully. "What is the point?" She repeated, surprising Nabatame. She turned to Nabatame, face serious. "Really, what's the point of this? This… stupid competition. What am I trying to prove?"

Nabatame blinked. What was Natsuki trying to prove? She cleared her throat, prayed she was good at this kind of stuff, and then answered with, "You're trying to prove your worthiness of being Shizuru's. Or at least that's what I thought we had determined… not to mention you want to be with her on her mission, right?"

The look of pure and utter rage devoured the usual gleam in Natsuki's eyes before dying away almost instantly. Nabatame blinked. What the hell had happened to this girl in the last 24 hours?

Natsuki looked away. "So beating out the school's top students will make me worthy of Shizuru?" She asked, though Nabatame could tell it wasn't a question directed to anyone. "Am I not already good enough?" Or is Alyssa just… better? Why do I have to fight to prove myself?

"What are you talking about, Natsuki?" Nabatame asked, her voice heavy with concern. The use of Natsuki's first name didn't go unnoticed. The third year placed a hand on Natsuki's shoulder but the girl instantly moved away. "Obviously the Lieutenant already finds you worthy… you're the one who wants to prove yourself to her, even though she's already accepted you as you are."

"Sorry," Natsuki grumbled. "You're right. This was my decision. Shizuru doesn't even want me to compete…" Her gaze fell to the floor. She took a deep breath. "Last night I went by Shizuru's…" she started, unsure if she wanted to tell anyone else what was going on or not.

Then again, the last time she didn't tell anyone what was going on she ended up nearly getting Shizuru killed.

"Earlier that day she told me not to go to her room, it's off-limits and all that," Natsuki added as she finally got the courage to tell this story straight to Nabatame's face. "But I went anyways…"

Nabatame didn't see a problem with that, after all, Natsuki wasn't the type to follow rules no matter how much sense they made. Her first thought was that Jin must've caught them doing something. She was the bitch that was keeping tabs on them, right? "So then what happened?"

Once more Natsuki's face contorted with pure unadulterated rage. "Alyssa was there." Blonde colonel is a dead blonde colonel.

The third year wasn't surprised by that either. When Natsuki said nothing she said, "So you're still paranoid about this, huh?"

Natsuki shot Nabatame a glare and the third year's eyes widened in realization.

"She didn't," Nabatame said suddenly as she leaned forward. "The Lieutenant wouldn't—"

"She told Alyssa that they didn't have to worry because she told me not to come over… and then they got all comfy on the bed and they were touching an—" Natsuki swallowed, "and then Alyssa confessed to Shizuru that she still loved her…"

Nabatame shook her head in disbelief. "No way… I'll kick Alyssa's ass!" She declared, though she knew that the enemy colonel could wipe the floor with her. She smirked when she saw the comment had brought a barely noticeable smile to Natsuki's lips. "So how'd Shizuru let her down?" Nabatame wanted to know.

Natsuki growled as she relived it, watching from the outside. Shizuru hadn't told Alyssa where to shove it. No. She had invited Alyssa to 'sleep over.' And by sleep over… she obviously meant something else if the seductive voice meant anything. Each beat of Natsuki's heart was painful, like the more blood it pumped the more poison it released into her bloodstream. Rage filled her once more. Shizuru could go to hell. Shizuru and Alyssa. Natsuki would escort them there herself.

Nabatame lost the smirk and tried to get Natsuki to look at her. "She did let Alyssa down… right?" Right?!

"They slept together," Natsuki said, her voice bordering on a snarl. The first year was pissed. She suddenly turned to meet Nabatame's eyes once more and Nabatame had to sit back a bit for the look in Natsuki's eyes was intense, fierce.

"You saw this?"

Natsuki pulled her bottom lip into her mouth and chewed before saying, "Alyssa agreed to sleep over, Shizuru was wearing her sexy nightgown and got into the bed, then Alyssa turned off the lights…"

"I'll fucking kill her! I never liked blondes…"

Natsuki offered the concerned third year another grateful smile before running her fingers through her hair. The gesture made her think of Shizuru so she stopped and let out a deep sigh. "Alyssa expressed concern over me finding out about them… Shizuru said not to worry because I'd be busy preparing for the competition… not to mention her room is 'restricted.'" Natsuki paused briefly before adding, "And Alyssa left earlier that day to go back to Fuuka. She said she'd see me today, at the competition and that she needed to get back to work… she wasn't supposed to be at Garderobe at all! She and Shizuru had said goodbye… as if they weren't planning on seeing each other the rest of that day. I even asked Shizuru about it and Shizuru told me that Alyssa had gone back to Fuuka for a night class. So did she lie?"

Nabatame still had trouble believing all of this. "You're absolutely sure?" She had to admit though, all that seemed suspicious as hell. She figured Shizuru and Alyssa still had some kind of romantic feelings left over from their past relationship. After all, Shizuru Fujino doesn't just date anyone… and they had dated a while. No one even knew why they broke up. She just never expected those romantic feelings to ever surface again, especially not so powerfully that they could compete with Shizuru's feelings for Natsuki. Then again… to break up and STILL manage to be best friends? That was rare… and also why Nabatame had suspicions there were still feelings there.

And then there's the fact that Alyssa had said she was leaving for Fuuka, and then apparently was back in Shizuru's room at night. Either she had left and come back or she had never left at all. Why did Shizuru decide now to "seriously" restrict access completely to her room? That exact day? What on EARTH could Shizuru be smoking if she thinks having your ex-girlfriend sleep over is OKAY? Then again, as Natsuki said, they probably hadn't really slept at all.

"Nao said I shouldn't jump to conclusions but…" Natsuki sighed. "God I know Shizuru. I know her. She would never do this to me and I know this. So… I just… I don't want to do anything until I find out for sure. I'm going to find out… if anything actually happened before I let myself feel anything too… extreme." Natsuki wasn't going to get depressed or anything. She wasn't going to cry like a little baby. No. There was no proof first of all and Natsuki didn't want to overreact since she wasn't even sure if anything had happened.

"She loves you," Nabatame offered, though it was rather weak. Shit, say something else! Nabatame plowed through her archives. What would Tanaka say? She paused. Wait. Tanaka is a bitch, she'd be bad at this stuff too. Nabatame, growing frustrated with her thoughts, finally said, "Even if there is something going on between them, you can win her back."

Natsuki's head turned slightly, bathing Nabatame in her emerald gaze, fury burning brightly. "I don't want her back."

The words stopped Nabatame's heart. She had thought Natsuki and Shizuru were comparable to her and Tanaka. Nabatame knew deep down that one day she would marry Tanaka. She had felt the same type of bond between Shizuru and Natsuki.

"What do you mean you don't want to win her back?" Nabatame finally managed to ask, completely dumbfounded.

Natsuki hugged herself, annoyed that the locker room had gotten so cold. "The only reason Shizuru was attracted to me in the first place was because I reminded her of Alyssa."

Nabatame stayed quiet on that. She had to admit, when she saw Alyssa and Natsuki training together the other day she wouldn't have been surprised if they were sisters but with different mothers. Seriously, the mannerisms and smiles were uncanny. Alyssa and Natsuki both carried themselves very nearly the same way, though Alyssa had a bit more confidence, a bit more poise. She was also much more intimidating without really trying, whereas Natsuki had to at least glare. Alyssa always appeared intelligent, whereas Natsuki sometimes had the blankest expression on her face. Still, they were definitely similar and Nabatame didn't doubt they had similar interests or hobbies.

Natsuki continued, "Or maybe she wants both of us…" That was a new thought. Shizuru would love to have Alyssa and Natsuki. Alyssa, her lover who she could have sex with while she was 'waiting' for Natsuki to be 'ready.' But that was ridiculous. Shizuru wouldn't do that… she was being patient… she was the one that had told Natsuki to wait… right? Then again… maybe Shizuru was trying to figure out her own feelings by being with Alyssa… maybe she was deciding between the two… who knew? Natsuki had to find out.

"Shit." The curse was said with an ironic smile, as if Natsuki had just realized she'd been fooled. "Maybe she loves me enough to not want to hurt me. She knows she saved me… knows that if she breaks me she might undo all the progress she's made with me… it's why she's hiding it from me. She's not trying to be hurtful, not trying to be cruel… maybe she wants to slowly distance herself from me so that, when she's sure I can go on without her, she can break it off and be happy with Alyssa…" The girl's brow furrowed. That sounded absolutely ridiculous. Everything about Shizuru being the 'bad guy' seemed so laughably wrong. "Wow this is confusing. I'm not even… sad or anything just pissed off and confused. Is that weird?" Natsuki turned her questioning gaze on the third year.

"Nah… you have a right to be confused." And pissed. Nabatame was impressed with how fast Natsuki could come up with reasons why Shizuru would do what she may have or may not have done. Clearly Natsuki had already had these kinds of insecurities about her relationship with her teacher.

Fujino obviously loved Natsuki, but if what Natsuki says is true then perhaps Shizuru just didn't want to hurt Natsuki by breaking up with her. That would ruin Natsuki's chances in the competition and cause Natsuki to become that angry child she was in the beginning of the year. Or would that be underestimating Natsuki's strength and how much the girl had grown into a woman? Nabatame saw a damaged but strong woman, not a terrified young girl afraid of trusting anyone. If you were going to love Natsuki Kuga you had to be careful.

"You've put a lot of thought into this," Nabatame said after a moment, snapping Natsuki back to reality. "Maybe you should confront Fujino about it first before jump—"a pause, "before doing what Nao said you might be doing."

Natsuki nodded. "Yeah. That's exactly what I'm going to do." She frowned a bit. "Er, well maybe not exactly that…"

Nabatame quirked a brow. "Then what?"

"I'm going to see if I can, you know, find out anything without confronting her. She told me she'd never cheat on me, so I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt before I find out for sure." Natsuki stood up and dusted her pants off.

The third year eyed Natsuki suspiciously. "You're going to be able to act normal around her even though--?"

Natsuki took a deep breath and offered Nabatame, who was still sitting down with a completely confused expression on her face, a brilliant smile. "I trust Shizuru. I…I'll be fine without Shizuru. I don't really want to talk about it anymore." Natsuki walked towards the door and exited through it.

Nabatame slowly stood up as well and then followed after her friend. They were standing in the underbelly of the arena now. Her eyes flickered briefly to the approaching Kazuya and then settled back on her completely confused friend. "Sorry but I have to know, what are you going to do?" She asked quietly.

"I have no idea, really. I guess I'm going to wait. I need to find out if she truly cares about me… if she loves me more than she loves Alyssa…" She groaned, knowing that just being in the same room as Shizuru would be awkward. "I'm going to pretend I didn't see anything last night and see if she's acting differently… that'll give me a clue to what she really wants." Natsuki grinned at Nabatame, as if this were her amazing new idea. "She loves me, she loves me not. I'll find out and then decide from there what to do."

"That's dumb," Nabatame growled. "Punch her in the face."

Natsuki looked shocked. "But she's pretty."

"Let's unleash your inner beast and show Shizuru you don't need her to have fun either." Nabatame grinned, her blue eyes sparkling with promises of mischief.

Natsuki, finding the look rather exciting, smiled back. "I like the sound of that." The smile quickly faded when Kazuya cleared his throat a few feet away. Both girls turned to acknowledge the boy.

"Hey Kazuya," Nabatame said with a mock salute. She had fought him before. He was quite talented and even gave her some trouble. Of course she had defeated him, but still, he was challenging so she respected his abilities. Oh shit. The thought struck her. How is Natsuki going to beat him? She seems… fine for the most part but how can I be sure she won't lose focus? Alyssa and Shizuru were both in the spectator's booth last I checked.

"Hello Akemi," Kazuya said with the same mock salute and a smile to the fellow third year. His gaze then turned to Natsuki and he gave her a more proper salute. "Hey there, Private Kuga."

Natsuki, not bothering to salute back, gave him a curt nod. "Hey."

Kazuya folded his arms over his chest, showing off his bulging biceps. Intentionally or not, Natsuki wasn't sure. He had an assault rifle on his back and a pistol in his hip holster. A knife was attached to the side of his black combat boot and he was dressed in the usual dark green Garderobe uniform.

"So Akane and Tomoe have been fighting pretty long," he said with a sigh. Natsuki could tell he was nervous. His eyes spoke of his concern for his girlfriend, Akane.

"I'm sure Akane will be fine," Nabatame offered. "I've never fought her myself but she's rather talented isn't she?"

Kazuya smiled and nodded. "Yes, she's great." He shifted uncomfortably on his feet. "It's just… she's going to be too gentle with Tomoe. She underestimates the girl because she's a first year but I've seen that girl fight and… well," he gave Nabatame a playful grin, to show he was kidding, "you better move over, Akemi."

Nabatame snorted. "Puh-leeez," she drawled. "That Marguerite chick wouldn't dare challenge my position." The third year folded her arms and harrumphed, as if she were insulted at the mere notion.

Kazuya chuckled and then turned his attention back to Natsuki, expression serious once more. "So I think we need a safe word," he said.

Nabatame looked between the two, her brow furrowing. "A safe word?"

Natsuki gave Nabatame an apologetic glance. "Sorry, forgot to mention Kazuya was throwing the match for me so that he can be with Akane and all that," she waved her hands dismissively. "So I have nothing to worry about."

Nabatame suddenly cast a suspicious glance to the still smiling Kazuya, who blinked at the look the other third year was giving him. "What?" He asked, eyebrows lifting.

"You better do what you say you're going to do," Nabatame warned. She then looked at Natsuki and explained, "He may say he's going to throw the match to lower your guard and then you'd be shocked when he actually fights back and then wins."

"I assure you I don't plan on doing any such thing," Kazuya said with a frown when Natsuki shot him a similar suspicious glare. He held up both his hands as if to block blows. "I swear to God I will lose this match on purpose, hence why I even bothered to come over here to agree on a safe word."

"Pineapple," Nabatame offered.

Natsuki chuckled a bit. She wasn't that worried about Kazuya. She knew that people did crazy things for the people they loved, and she could tell Kazuya was sincere about his feelings for Akane. No, Kazuya would keep his word.

"How about… smorgasbord?" Natsuki offered. Nabatame sent her an amused look while Kazuya looked baffled at the choice. Natsuki blushed and looked away. "Okay, no to smorgasbord, geez. It was just a suggestion."

Kazuya smiled at the first year's cuteness. She was rather adorable. It was as if one second she could become a sexy badass and then the next an adorable, cute girl that blushes often. He frowned as he realized she reminded him of his younger sister… not the sexy part, the adorable part. "Banana?"

"What is it with you two and fruit?" Natsuki asked with a frown, her tone annoyed.

The third years huffed. "How about negi?" Nabatame offered. "That's a vegetable right?"

For some reason, Natsuki really hated that idea. "No," she said instantly. "The safe word is now 'jell-o.'" Natsuki looked at Kazuya and then Nabatame. "Any objections?"

They both shook their heads.

"Jell-O's good," Kazuya said with a quick smile. "So when I'm ready for you to take me out I guess I'll mouth the word 'Jell-O' since I don't want the microphone to pick it up… that'd be suspicious."

Natsuki nodded. "Yeah. Give me an opening and I'll take it… just don't disarm me, alright?"

Kazuya nodded. "Got it."

Suddenly, the noise of the medic team running across the floor to get to someone sounded and everyone turned to look.

"Akane!" Kazuya yelled as he darted over to where his girlfriend was being surrounded by the emergency medical team.

Natsuki and Nabatame exchanged looks before following after him.

When they arrived, Kazuya was being forcefully held back by some of the medical personnel. "LET ME SEE HER!" He snarled as he fought them off and darted to her side. Akane was knocked unconscious, bloody and bruised.

Natsuki looked away from the depressing sight. "Tomoe," she growled under her breath.

Nabatame nodded. "That much damage is unnecessary," she agreed quietly. "Just because you're powerful doesn't mean you have to overdo things… it's when you can hold back that you're really holding the cards."

"Shizuru or not, I'm going to kick Tomoe's ass in the final," Natsuki declared. She watched as Kazuya broke free of the medical personnel and managed to grab Akane's hand briefly before she was carried away. He stood there, fists at his sides, eyes narrowed as he watched his girlfriend be taken away.

"She'll be fine," Nabatame offered as she put a comforting hand on Kazuya's shoulder. She felt a little awkward doing it, but Kazuya was her friend. Most other third years resented Nabatame. She had Tanaka, a fan club, raw talent. It wasn't often Nabatame hung out with other third years, save the few 'cool' ones.

Kazuya's blue eyes flashed dangerously and he spun to stare at Natsuki. "I hope you teach her a lesson in the final, Kuga," he said quietly, "Because I'm seriously considering cancelling our deal so I can."

Natsuki's eyes widened and she flailed her arms. "No, no! I'll teach her a lesson, you should stay and take care of Akane," Natsuki nodded hastily, "Leave her to me! Trust me, I have beef with her since I got to this school… I won't let her go that easy."

Kazuya gave her a small smile but nodded. "I'll leave her to you then."

"Will Private Natsuki Kuga head to entry ramp number two and Private Kazuya Krau to ramp number one? Match number two will be starting shortly."

Natsuki and Kazuya both looked away from the metal speaker box on the wall that had just spoken in order to give each other 'see ya in the arena' smiles. Natsuki rather liked Kazuya. He wasn't rude like nearly every other person she had fought against.

This was it. Natsuki was going to the final match after her little fake-match with Kazuya. A part of her wasn't as excited about it as she would have been had Shizuru not… screwed everything up. Honestly, did she even want to go on this mission with Shizuru anymore? Did Shizuru herself want Natsuki to go with her? It was probably better than Tomoe but still… would Alyssa like that? Shizuru going away with Natsuki? No, Natsuki didn't think Alyssa would.

"I'll see you in the arena, Kuga," Kazuya said with a brilliant smile and a friendly wink.

Natsuki winked back and then smirked. "See you."

She watched Kazuya walk towards his entry ramp and then turned to face Nabatame, who looked like she was in deep thought. Natsuki tilted her head. "What's up?"

Nabatame, looking startled, just shook her head. "Nothing. I'm just thinking how lucky you got." She gestured Natsuki to follow her and they walked in the opposite direction Kazuya had just walked off in.

"What do you mean?" Natsuki asked curiously. After all, 'lucky' was not one of the raging emotions she was feeling right now.

Nabatame shrugged and she cast the first year a sidelong glance. "Kazuya is throwing the match the day you probably would've failed miserably."

Natsuki sighed. "You're right. Just thinking of actually fighting someone for my life today just makes me more exhausted then I already am."

They stopped just outside the large metal door, the teacher tapping his foot impatiently for the two girls to stop talking to each other so he could make sure Natsuki was ready.

Nabatame put both her hands on Natsuki's shoulders and opened her mouth to say something when the teacher rudely interrupted her.

"Are you done yet? Are you even allowed to be down here? Competitors only, Private Nabatame," the teacher said, his hands on his hips.

Natsuki saw Nabatame grow annoyed and the third year slowly turned her head to face the teacher. "Shut up or I tranq you. Got it?"

The teacher, unimpressed, just huffed and folded his arms over his chest. His foot was still tapping impatiently.

Nabatame rolled her eyes and then proceeded to stare seriously into Natsuki's green eyes. "Listen Natsuki, after this little match we're going to party, understood?"

Natsuki frowned slightly. "Huh?"

Nabatame grinned, winked, and let her arms fall off Natsuki's shoulders. "You'll see."

Natsuki blinked.

"Done?"

Nabatame glared at the man, didn't bother replying, and turned and stalked away.

The man, lips pursed in a thin line, turned to face Natsuki. "Surprised to see you here, got to admit," he said.

Natsuki quirked a brow. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're a first year that's made it to the semi-final match. But I guess it's because you've been hanging out with Private Nabatame," the teacher said with a shrug. He then looked her up and down. "Ready to go?"

Natsuki nodded. "Since I got here."

The man nodded and opened the large doors. "Good luck to you, Kuga," he said as she stepped out of the darkness and into the light of the sun.

---

Shizuru leaned closer over the railing when Natsuki appeared at the opposite end of the arena. A nearby TV screen instantly zoomed in on her face. She looked nonchalant. Bored, one could say. Her green eyes were lacking their usual luster, but at least she didn't have the usual nervousness or anxiousness she usually had upon stepping into the arena. Natsuki's stance looked rather confident. It was settling to know Natsuki wasn't worried.

Alyssa was standing right next to Shizuru. She was dressed in another dark green Garderobe uniform, military cap on her head. She and Alyssa were holding hands, but out of the view of the cameras that were always focused on the spectator's booth.

Jin was sitting behind them, her expression that of someone unimpressed. She had her usual yellow notepad in her lap, though she wasn't writing anything in it. Occasionally she'd cast Alyssa a dirty look, but the woman wasn't even facing her, so Jin would end up just glaring at the back of the colonel's head.

Anh looked displeased about something. She was sitting with Rauschenberg and Reito on the couch, casting unhappy glares at Alyssa, and Shizuru too. She almost felt like she was bonding with Jin, so she deciding to change her focus and instead talk to Officer Rauschenberg, who was talking excitedly about the usual party that went down after the semi-final match. Reito was calmly tapping away at his keyboard, his eyes lifting every once in a while to meet with the amethysts of Haruka.

Haruka was standing at the railing like Shizuru and Alyssa, though she was on the far right, where she kept the microphone. She grabbed it, gave the quick rundown of the rules, and asked if the competitors were ready.

"Ready," Kazuya's voice rang throughout the stadium.

"Ready," Natsuki said, the microphone's around the arena doing her husky voice justice.

"Begin," Haruka said, and the match started instantly. The blonde woman turned and leaned her back against the wall of the spectator's booth. Everyone seemed quiet. She eyed Alyssa and Shizuru uneasily. Something was just weird. It almost felt like it did when they themselves were just students at Garderobe.

"So what's the computer predicting, Kanzaki?" Haruka asked, her arms folded over her chest.

Reito's hands glided over his keyboard. "Not surprisingly, the computer believes that Private Krau will be the victor of today's match."

"That'd make it Tomoe Marguerite and Kazuya Krau in the final…" Haruka said quietly, her fist under her chin as she eyed the two students going at it currently. Natsuki and Kazuya were both firing shots at each other. They both missed.

"I'm still not sure whether to be surprised or not that Private Marguerite made it to the finals," Rauschenberg commented. "I mean she's Garderobe's star student but she's still a first year."

"Imagine if we have two first years next match…" Reito said as he decided to give his fingers a break and leaned back against the couch. "Would that be making history?"

Haruka rubbed at her chin and then shrugged. "Probably. I can't remember the last time we had two first years in a final round. One first year sure, but never two."

Shizuru swallowed hard, her hand gripping Alyssa's tighter.

"Ooh they're fist-fighting now," Alyssa said excitedly, her body leaning over the railing even more. The kind of excitement Alyssa got from watching a match never got old.

"Are you even supposed to be here?" Jin growled from her seat. Alyssa cast her a dismissive look over her shoulder, her blue eyes like ice.

"Are you even supposed to be out of jail for rigging a trial?"

Jin shot up from her chair and pulled out her pistol in one liquid movement. She aimed it right at Alyssa's forehead. The blonde colonel seemed unperturbed by the threat, though she had to admit, she wasn't prepared for that to happen.

The dark-haired general bared her teeth like some type of rabid dog. "I was proven innocent."

"Money talks," Alyssa said, now fully turned away from the arena to face Jin head-on. She gave a small smirk, her head tilting slightly as if she pitied Jin. "Oh, and I got my visitor's pass renewed this morning. Ask Haruka." She then gestured with a nod of her head to the blonde, who was looking frustrated.

The blonde nodded when Jin turned to her for confirmation. "I renewed her pass. Put the damn gun away, Higa." Too tired to berate someone for once, Haruka just turned her back on the conflict and continued watching the match.

Natsuki and Kazuya had both stopped fighting, as if they were talking. It seemed all rather awkward. Haruka blinked, "The fuck?"

---

"Banana!" Kazuya hissed under his breath as Natsuki dodged a poorly flung punch.

"What?" Natsuki hissed back. Wasn't that the wrong safe word? She threw a kick, which he could've dodged but didn't, and sent him flying backwards. He landed with a thud onto his back.

The audience was murmuring now. Their moves seemed so hesitant, reluctant, as if it were all planned out.

Natsuki took out her pistol once more and pointed it at him.

"Uh…" He looked like he was searching his brain for something, "Oh!" Kazuya tried to look as injured as possible as he whispered, "Jell-O…"

Natsuki fired a tranquilizer into Kazuya's torso and let out a relieved sigh.

---

Haruka's eyes widened. The crowd went ballistic.

"Kuga! Kuga! Kuga!"

While the others yelled, "Marguerite! Marguerite! Marguerite!"

Tomoe and Natsuki were going to the final match.

Jin stood up and walked over to the railing. "She won?" She asked, unable to hide the surprise seeping into her voice. Golden eyes went wide when she saw Natsuki's form standing above Kazuya's unconscious body. "That was fast," she growled, obviously suspicious.

"My," was all Shizuru said, her eyes focused intently on the girl in the arena.

"Kuga is going to the final match…" Rauschenberg said, her tone impressed as she too got up and trailed to the arena. Anh and Reito followed.

"Cool," Alyssa said simply. "Two first years in a final match."

Jin watched as Natsuki turned and began walking to the exit. Golden eyes flickered dangerously before she glared at Alyssa and Shizuru and then turned and walked away.

---

Natsuki collapsed onto the wooden bench near her locker once more. She buried her face in her hands and let out a relieved exhale. Man. She had made it to the goddamn finals!

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Okay. She ran her hands through her dark hair a few times and let out a shaky sigh. She was going to the finals, so she should be excited! This is what she had worked so hard for, this is what she had said she wanted to do practically her third day of classes. She wanted to show her worth, prove she wasn't useless, prove she could be so much more then what she was… prove she could protect and be with Shizuru.

Natsuki shot up from her seat and slammed her fist into the locker in front of her. A loud noise, coupled with Natsuki's whimper, echoed through the empty locker room.

"Now, now," Jin cooed as she stepped through the door and sauntered over to a baffled Natsuki. "Let's not get violent, Kuga."

Natsuki watched Jin warily through narrowed eyes. She turned her body away from the locker and faced Jin instead, her hands ready to form fists at her sides. "What do you want?" Natsuki asked, her voice bordering on a warning growl.

Jin lifted a brow and leaned her shoulder against the locker. She said nothing for a bit, content to watch the girl squirm under her yellow gaze. Finally the dark-haired general spoke. "I warned you, didn't I?"

Natsuki, unwavering, replied with. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Don't tell me you still haven't noticed after all this time," Jin said, a small frown forming on her face as her eyes filled with pity. "Aw you poor, poor dear." Jin slowly shook her head.

"Stop screwing around and get to it, Jin," Natsuki snarled, her fingers digging into her palms. "I have places to be."

"Ah yes, the party that usually goes on after the semi-final match. When I was in school we called it the Semi-Final Festival," Jin explained, as if they were having a casual chat in the park. "The school divided into two groups. One group favored one final competitor and the other group favored the other… and then the two groups would throw a raging party, play pranks on the other party… it was good times."

Natsuki stayed silent before moving forward to walk by Jin, who grabbed her by the collar and slammed her into the locker. Natsuki growled and wrapped her fingers around Jin's wrist. Jin smirked dangerously as she lifted Natsuki off the ground only using one arm.

Green eyes widened as she struggled to break out of Jin's powerful hold. "Get off of me!" How the fuck was Jin that strong?

"Then stay and listen to me, Kuga. What's the rush?" Jin dropped Natsuki and the girl was thankful when her feet touched the linoleum floor of the locker room again. Natsuki's space was still being invaded by Jin, who was so close Natsuki could see the freckles in her yellow irises.

"I'm not going to ask again. What do you want?" Natsuki asked, her voice quiet now that she knew Jin was being serious. She made no move to get away, knowing she'd just end up flung around like a paper doll. There was a time and a place for acting reckless, and around Jin was not the place whereas now was not the time.

Jin's lips twitched into a smug smile. "How are things with you and Shizuru?" The look on Natsuki's face told Jin everything she wanted to know. Thought so.

"We—we're just teacher and—"

"Right," Jin interrupted. She rolled her eyes and then said, "So I hear she's dating Alyssa again."

The words were heavy, crushing. It didn't matter that Jin had said it, it was just the fact that that wasa possibility right now.

Natsuki's eyes, wide with shock, darted up to meet Jin's. "I don't believe you."

Jin moved away from Natsuki's personal bubble a bit and shrugged. "I guess you wouldn't, she doesn't want anyone to know just yet… especially you, knowing what that kind of news could do to you. Then again, I guess I could just be imagining hearing her bed bouncing through the walls all last night and this morning…" Jin let out a laugh. "Alyssa sure has energy…"

"Shut up!" Natsuki growled as she shoved Jin. The woman barely budged.

"I guess it must be hard," Jin said with a dramatic sigh. She patted a growling Natsuki's head and sighed deeply once again when Natsuki moved away from her hand. "After all, there aren't many people that are better than Alyssa Goddamn Searrs. Especially not a shrimpy first year with daddy issues."

Natsuki tried to ignore what Jin was saying. She's fucking with me, she's fucking with me. It was her personal mantra on repeat. Don't listen, don't listen. "Is that all you came to say? Because I don't know if you've noticed, but I don't care who Lieutenant Fujino is dating."

Jin lifted a sleek brow. "No? So you don't care that this has been going on behind your back for at least a week now?" The black-haired woman gave Natsuki a sympathetic look.

Natsuki swallowed hard and tried to calm her racing heart. "I don't care."

Jin gave a small smile, "Huh, go figure. I'd expect you to be on your way to killing Searrs now or something." The general looked impressed. "Great willpower you have there. I'm envious."

Natsuki shrugged. "She won," Natsuki heard herself saying. Wait, what do I mean by that? I'm NOT letting Jin get to me! I—I can't. I don't know anything for sure yet. "I mean… uh…"

Jin grinned like a Cheshire cat and gently patted Natsuki on the head. The girl didn't even register the touch. "It's so nice that you're so strong about this whole thing… when this happened to me I damn near lost it," Jin said with another exasperated sigh.

Natsuki didn't immediately respond. She was still thinking about all the hints, all the clues… all the little signs that were blaringly obvious. Shizuru and Alyssa, no matter how close they were, acted like a couple. They had broken up (and no one knew why) yet still managed to stay best friends? That's impossible… unless they still had mutual feelings for each other.

I'm an idiot, Natsuki concluded. How could she have been okay with all of the flirting? Why did she never confront Shizuru about it? Did she truly believe it wouldn't have led to something else? They used to be bed-buddies for God's sake… except worse because they had loved each other. Love… present tense.

Once more, Natsuki's entire being was filled with anger, rage. She wanted to kick something until it cried. She wanted to make Shizuru pay.

But I don't know for sure! Benefit of the doubt, benefit of the doubt, benefit of the—

"So will you still be competing against Tomoe in a few days?" Jin asked as Natsuki went back to ignoring the older woman's presence and began gathering her things.

Natsuki cast Jin a glare and then slung her bag over her shoulder. "Yeah, why wouldn't I?"

Jin shrugged. "I just don't see the point now."

"I'm not doing this for Shi—the Lieutenant," Natsuki half-lied. It was just as much about her as it was about wanting to be with Shizuru. "She herself said she doesn't want me competing, I'm doing it for me."

Jin shrugged and walked towards the exit. She paused, her hand on the doorknob, and then turned to look at Natsuki. "When you're ready to admit we're the same, you know where to find me."

Natsuki said nothing, her green eyes staring blankly back into the burning gold of Jin's. The tall general smirked and left.

I'm not like you, Natsuki thought as she watched the door close behind Jin with a soft click.

Hands clasped behind her back, Jin headed for the door that led out of the inner-arena and out into Garderobe's campus. "It really is a shame," she purred. She wasn't too worried about the follow-up trial that would take place some time after the final match. She was sure that this little issue would either provide her with more evidence to use against Shizuru, or at least it would be fun to watch Kuga go insane, just like she had.

I'm not insane, Jin thought, I just know how to hold a grudge.

---

Natsuki, eventually, slipped out of the inner-arena. She blinked when she saw who was waiting for her outside the door, standing in the snow with homemade signs that had her name on them.

Everyone.

"KUGA!" A chorus of voices all cheered, and Natsuki was nearly tackled by her fan club, other first years, some second years, and a few third years that were supporting her against Tomoe.

"Hey! Hi. Hello," Natsuki said as she shook the hands of the countless people that came up to her to introduce themselves. They moved so fast that their faces all blurred together. Hands all felt the same; eyes were all the same color. It was all so fast.

One girl she recognized as 'Aki' came up to her and was already blushing. Natsuki smiled weakly at her. "Hey there, Aki," Natsuki said with her usual husky tone.

The girl's eyes widened and her smile couldn't have been wider. "Y-You remember me!"

Natsuki blinked down at the girl. "Yes. I do." You fainted, remember?

"I-I just wanted to say you're soooo cool and great! And you fight so well! And I just know you're going to win against Tomoe in the final match!" Aki spoke so fast, gushed so enthusiastically, Natsuki was almost rendered speechless. How does the girl speak so fast?

Clearing her throat and then pulling at her uniform's collar, Natsuki did a quick scan of the area. She suddenly saw her friends giggling nearby. Mai, Chie, Aoi, Nao… they were all pointing and laughing, probably at the look of terror on Natsuki's face. Next to them, but not completely separate nor apart of Natsuki's first year friends, were Nabatame and Sasaki talking amongst themselves. Occasionally Nabatame would look over and give Natsuki a grin. On the opposite end of the large crowd the Council were all circled around talking to each other but also watching her deal with this sudden influx of people.

Shizuru and Alyssa weren't anywhere to be seen.

The thorny stem of the rose wrapped around Natsuki's heart constricted, causing the thorns to bury themselves deeply into the pumping muscle. What the hell? Where the frick was Shizuru? Shouldn't she be here? Natsuki was more surprised than anything else. She tried to push her rage back into her, not wanting to get mad over such a silly thing. Surely Shizuru had something else to do that required her attention. Obviously Natsuki would see her later…

"N-Natsuki?" Aki asked, her large blue eyes staring up at Natsuki curiously and with some concern. "Are you alright?" The young girl asked again. Natsuki wondered how old this girl was. Garderobe Prep kids ranged from 12 to 16. She looked to be around 14, or perhaps 15.

"I'm fine," Natsuki mumbled. She then offered the younger girl a smile and then cleared her throat loudly so that she could gain everyone's attention. Nabatame, leaving a disgruntled Sasaki behind, forced her way through the crowd and stopped right beside Natsuki.

Everyone was silent now, their eyes watching the competitor they supported. For God's sake, it looked like half the school had stuck around after the match just to give Natsuki their support. Nabatame snickered and then leaned over to Natsuki and whispered, "Announce the party."

Natsuki glanced at Nabatame, her gaze that of someone uncertain. She had never been the center of attention to so many people at once before… there were at least 100 other students before her, all standing and waiting. The other students either weren't going to participate or they were at Tomoe's gathering.

Nabatame rolled her eyes, swung her arm around Natsuki's shoulders, and yelled loud enough so everyone could hear, "SEMI-FINAL FESTIVAL IN NATSUKI KUGA'S HONOR STARTS AT SUNDOWN. MEET AT THE LAKE. DRESS WARM, KIDDIES." She paused and then added, "IT'S B.Y.O.B!"

Natsuki blinked as everyone burst into cheers and hollers once more, fists punched the air and the students began racing off in all different directions to prepare. On these nights everyone let loose and went wild. It was completely not allowed, Haruka didn't agree with it at all nor did previous master sergeants, though it was a tradition.

"KUGA! KUGA!" The chants were like a pulse, over and over again. It was so loud Natsuki could feel it in her chest, vibrate through the ground into her feet and spread through her body. It felt good.

Natsuki felt dizzy all of a sudden, and she turned to a grinning Nabatame with dazed eyes. "What does B.Y.O.B stand for?" She whispered, not wanting to sound naive to passersby.

"Bring your own booze," Nabatame explained. "Or bongs in some cases, but tonight is not those kinds of parties." Natsuki could tell by the excited look in her friend's eyes that she partied often, or… perhaps she was so excited because it had been a while since she partied hard?

"Okay so wait. All these people are going to be partying in my honor tonight at the lake?" Natsuki asked for clarification.

"Yeah, whenever there's a competition everyone looks forward to the semi-final match because of this faux-festival." She leaned forward, darted her eyes around as if she didn't want anyone to overhear, and then whispered, "If we call it a festival and not a party the Council actually turns a blind eye."

Natsuki grinned and nodded. "Got it. So the rest of the students who aren't supporting me are supporting Tomoe and she'll be having her party somewhere else?"

Nabatame shrugged. "That's usually how it goes. I think you have more supporters though…" her eyes scanned the disappearing students. "I don't know," she said with a shrug, "but it's fun to choose a competitor to 'back up' and then celebrate them going into the final match."

"You never know if they'll make it out," Nao said as she approached, Mai, Chie, and Aoi behind her.

"Ah, don't be so depressing, Nao," Chie said as she playfully punched the redhead's shoulder.

Nao shot Chie a glare and then shrugged. "Was just saying… that's what this is. A 'good job you made it to the final round but hope you don't die' party."

Mai let out a nervous laugh and discreetly whacked the redhead on the back. Nao pitched forward but caught herself and very nearly pummeled Mai before Natsuki placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. Nao met emerald eyes. "What?"

Natsuki gave her a weak smile. "Can't we not piss each other off too much tonight? I'm not in the mood."

Nao, knowing that Natsuki really didn't need any more stress right now, actually offered her friend a smile. The smile became devilish when Natsuki's eyes widened in surprise. "Come on," Nao said as she wrapped her hand around Natsuki's, much like she had done earlier that day, and began pulling her away. "We should get ready before we head over to the lake."

---

"So how much time do I get off before the final match?" Natsuki asked. She wanted to know how much time she'd have to train. She had to admit, it made her nervous. She had gotten better at fighting Tomoe during her time at Garderobe, mostly because Tomoe always attacked her during class, but Natsuki rarely ever got the upper hand.

Natsuki, Nao, and Nabatame were in their tent. Mai, Chie, and Aoi had left to their own tents to get ready as well. Nabatame was sitting on Natsuki's bed and Nao and Natsuki were gathering their things and getting ready. They were all also avoiding the topic that they knew was racing through Natsuki's mind. They weren't stupid. They had noticed Shizuru's (and Alyssa's) absence from the pre-Natsuki's-party announcement. The rest of the Council had been there, so why wasn't Shizuru?

Natsuki had also looked confused as hell, so there was a dead giveaway that yes Shizuru should have been there. But she hadn't been. Honestly, it made no sense. Natsuki was Shizuru's girlfriend, so the lieutenant should've been there to support her. Nao knew it didn't matter that perhaps half the audience had been there, what would matter to Natsuki is if Shizuru had been there. I'm going to slap that bitch next time I see her, the redhead mentally growled.

Nabatame shrugged. "I think the final match should be in a week. You have the rest of the week to recover and train up. We'll find out for sure when it is later."

Natsuki let out a groan and pulled a jacket on. She needed to see Shizuru before she did this thing. Needed to just… see her. She had to find out what was going on. "I'm going out," Natsuki said as she turned around. "I'll be back in a bit."

Nao, who had been laying out clothes on her bed, turned around to stare suspiciously at Natsuki. Nabatame, still sitting on Natsuki's bed on the opposite side from Nao's, recognized the look on Nao's face. Concern. The redhead knew about Shizuru and Alyssa, Nabatame wasn't the only one Natsuki had told.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" The redhead asked, her hip cocked and her arms folding under her chest as she eyed Natsuki with the look of a displeased mother. It was eerily similar to the way Mai sometimes looked.

Natsuki blinked as she paused with her finger still mid-way through unzipping the tent's entrance. She turned her head to the side so that she could quirk a brow in Nao's direction. "What do you mean 'where are you going?' Are you my mother now?"

Nao frowned and then gave a carefree shrug. "You're right. Go do something stupid."

Nabatame cleared her throat and hopped down from Natsuki's bed. God that thing is high. Why is it so high? Natsuki really wasn't that tall… she probably had to jump to get into it. Nao too. "Don't go see her," Nabatame said quietly. She saw Natsuki's form tense and become as rigid as steel. "I know you want to but I think… I think it's best if you just forget about it for a while."

Natsuki stayed absolutely still. Nabatame and Nao exchanged worried glances and then held their breath. Finally, Natsuki finished unzipping the tent and left without zipping it behind her.

---

If I were Shizuru, where would I be? Natsuki wondered.

With Alyssa.

No, I meant a place…

Somewhere warm? I bet Alyssa's warm.

Natsuki let out a frustrated growl and then remembered what Anh had said the other day. The teacher's offices… or lounge as Anh liked to call it. Natsuki hadn't been there in a while and she was sure Shizuru or at least someone who knew where she'd be would be there.

Natsuki made a right and began walking towards the track where she used to do her morning running. She hadn't had time to run recently, but since last night she's had a killer urge to just run free, sneakers smacking asphalt… or whatever it is they used to pave the track.

She made it in no time and then started walking across it towards the building with the tinted windows. She used to try to look into them every time she ran, wondering who was inside watching, if anyone inside was watching.

She paused when she saw four figures walking towards the entrance to the building. Natsuki knew she was far enough away to not be seen, besides, they all had their backs to her.

Anh, Rauschenberg, Alyssa, and Shizuru were all walking side-by-side towards the building. Harris was moving her hands in the air as she spoke, Anh's face was red from chuckling, and Alyssa and Shizuru seemed to be paying more attention to each other then Rauschenberg's story.

Natsuki's throat suddenly felt dry. They were allowed to talk. No big deal…

The four teachers came to a stop just before the steps leading up to the wooden double-doors. They all formed a small huddle, exchanged a few more words, and then broke into two groups. Anh and Harris left in one direction, while Alyssa and Shizuru watched after them from outside the building.

When Anh and Harris were far enough away, Alyssa turned to Shizuru and seemed to ask her something. Shizuru gave an uncharacteristic shrug and then made a small joke. Natsuki knew that smile. It was her playful smile. Alyssa's lips moved and Natsuki wished she could hear what the colonel was saying.

And then Alyssa placed her hand on Shizuru's cheek and leaned in. Shizuru tilted her head up slightly to accept the kiss. Natsuki very nearly looked away and squeezed her eyes shut, but she needed to see this.

Alyssa's head continued descending. Closer, closer, closer to Shizuru's eagerly awaiting lips.

"HEY!" Anh bellowed loud enough for Natsuki to hear, causing both Alyssa and Shizuru to freeze with their lips a mere inch away and turn to look at Anh, lazy grins on their faces. Anh wagged a disapproving finger at them before turning and walking off with Rauschenberg once more.

That had been close. Would they have actually kissed or perhaps they were just talking? Did their lips need to be so close, their eyes closed, for them to talk? Was Natsuki's mind now fucking with her? Playing tricks? How could she be sure?

Thump, thump, thump.

What the hell had that just been? What is going on?

Nao couldn't say Natsuki was jumping to conclusions after all, Natsuki had seen Shizuru and Alyssa almost kiss. Then again, an almost kiss didn't confirm anything… or was Natsuki just coming up with excuses now? Was she just in severe denial to protect her sanity? Would the truth break me? Am I truly that pathetic? Since when did I, Natsuki Kuga, give such a damn about another person?

Natsuki took a deep breath and felt her lungs expanding and then constricting in her chest. She exhaled, slow, shaky… this couldn't be happening, could it? Familiar tremors made their way from the tips of her fingers to all the way up her arms and into her chest.

When she looked back Shizuru was nodding at Alyssa, their expressions both serious. They both turned and headed into the building. Screw them.

Natsuki cleared her mind. That didn't just happen, that almost-kiss thing. Not at all. She had to see Shizuru. Had to… see her.

Before the girl knew it, her two feet were taking her towards the building once more. She felt fine now. Shoving her emotions deep down inside her where they couldn't bother her had turned out to be a good idea. Now she could handle this thing without jumping to conclusions… although those conclusions were getting harder and harder to ignore.

Natsuki remembered opening these doors, confused as to why all the teachers needed one big building dedicated to just them. She walked down the hallway and then stopped just in front of the first door on the right. It was the teacher's offices for the Council members, hence why it was so close to the entrance and exit, convenience, sort of like first class seats on an airplane.

Natsuki reached for the doorknob and cursed under her breath when she noticed her hand was shaking slightly. She made a fist, unclenched, clenched, then unclenched and wrapped her fingers around the cool metal. She could remember feeling nervous the first time she opened this door, wanting to request Shizuru to train her.

Natsuki turned the knob and pushed the door open.

Shizuru was sitting calmly at her desk, her eyes gliding from left to right as she read over the paper in her hand. Her chestnut colored hair was spilling over her shoulders and framing her beautiful face. Her hand held a pen against the curve of her chin and she would tap it to her porcelain skin every once in a while.

Alyssa Searrs was sitting on top of Shizuru's desk, her attention focused on the assault rifle she was currently cleaning with a cleaning rod. She was sitting on the front of it, her back to Shizuru who was focused intently on the work in front of her.

Neither looked up when Natsuki came in.

The girl cleared her throat. Alyssa looked up, saw Natsuki, jumped off Shizuru's desk as if guilty of something, and gave Natsuki a nervous smile. "Hey there, Kuga." She turned and placed her rifle on Shizuru's desk and said, "Saw you today in the competition, good job."

Natsuki gave a small nod. "Yeah, well, he let me win so… it wasn't a big deal."

"Still," Alyssa said with a roguish wink, "you're going to the finals. Way to go!" Natsuki had never seen Alyssa Searrs act so nervous. It was weird. Alyssa was always so… relaxed, nonchalant. She never seemed worried about anything.

"Thanks," Natsuki murmured, and her gaze settled on Shizuru, who was smiling at her brightly. Natsuki's chest filled with familiar warmth. Seeing that smile, so real and loving, Shizuru was the only one that could make Natsuki feel this way… so secure.

And then a flash of Shizuru almost kissing Alyssa just moments ago flashed through her mind. Natsuki couldn't keep the scowl off her face.

The Kyoto-woman's smile vanished, replaced by a look of absolute confusion. "Natsuki," she said, her tone cautious as she stood up from her desk and slowly walked around to the front of it. "I'm so proud of you," Shizuru said. She tried to sound happy, but the truth was she couldn't manage it. Natsuki was going to die. It was inevitable now.

The Kyoto-woman sent Alyssa a 'look' and the blonde colonel coughed before muttering, "I'll be right back," and leaving the room.

Natsuki watched Alyssa leave and then turned back to face Shizuru, who leaned backwards on her desk, lips curved in a mischievous smile that made Natsuki's cheeks burn.

"Um…" Natsuki suddenly felt torn. Was she angry or had she been foolish this whole time? But all the evidence… all the things she'd seen and heard! Natsuki chewed absentmindedly on her lower lip as she fought over what to say, fought over how to feel. She had hoped seeing Shizuru would clear some things up for her, show her how she should react. Instead it made Natsuki more confused. Shizuru looked completely fine, not guilty, not secretive. Everything was fine… but hadn't… hadn't things happened between Shizuru and Alyssa? How was Shizuru able to act so… normal when she was doing wrong things behind Natsuki's back… unless she wasn't doing anything at all?

I am so mind fucked right now, Natsuki determined as she continued staring at her now concerned looking teacher. She had no idea what to say. What the hell were you doing with Alyssa last night and a few moments ago? Or, I love you and I'm sorry I am paranoid right now.

"Natsuki?" Shizuru asked as she stepped towards her completely confused looking student. "Is something wrong?" Shizuru gently lifted her hand and placed it on Natsuki's cheek. For a second Natsuki's eyes widened only a fraction, and her own hand came up to rest over Shizuru's.

Do I lean into your palm or do I move away? Natsuki inwardly growled. Every fiber of her being wanted to melt into Shizuru's warm hand, bury into her neck, her scent.

Natsuki dropped her hand from Shizuru's and took a step away from her teacher. The new distance made it so that if Shizuru attempted to reach out for Natsuki once more, it would be awkward. "Where were you earlier?" Natsuki asked seriously, her green eyes piercing into Shizuru's shocked crimson.

The lieutenant stared at Natsuki. "K-Kannin na," Shizuru whispered as she moved backwards once more to lean her butt against the edge of her desk. Natsuki clearly wasn't in the mood to be touched. Was it because of that weird dream she had last night? Whatever the case, Shizuru would give Natsuki some space. "I was…" she looked past Natsuki to the door, where Alyssa probably was on the other side. Her gaze returned to Natsuki and she gave the girl her best apologetic look. "Busy." She paused, realized this wasn't nearly enough information at all, and added, "I meant to be at the announcement of your party… I wanted to congratulate you but Council business turned up."

Busy with… Alyssa? Natsuki tilted her head to the side and wondered if everything Shizuru was saying were lies. She wouldn't be surprised. Shizuru was so clever, reminding Natsuki of a smug snake that had convinced a young girl to eat a forbidden fruit. She could make Natsuki believe anything.

"Oh," Natsuki ended up saying. She continued eyeing Shizuru suspiciously. The Kyoto-woman began to look uncomfortable under the scrutinizing gaze and she stood up off the desk. "That's weird…" Natsuki said after a moment, her tone level and calm, "I could've sworn the rest of the Council was there…" Emeralds flashed dangerously.

Ara, am I being accused of lying? Shizuru was frustrated. Usually she could just coddle Natsuki and explain that everything was alright, that whatever was wrong, she would fix. Right now… being careful around Natsuki… it was messing up the flow of how she dealt with things like this.

"Yes, it was about the mission so none of the other Council members had to be there…" Shizuru explained quietly, treating Natsuki as if she were a bomb that would explode at any second. She offered Natsuki her brightest smile before asking, "So did you announce your party?" She wasn't sure whether or not Natsuki had known about the traditional semi-final festival… aka the excuse for all the students to go bat-shit insane for one crazy night.

Natsuki still appeared to be containing her emotions. Shizuru wondered what had Natsuki bottled up so. "Yeah, it's by the lake at sundown… I'm not really sure, Nabatame is handling it for me." She paused and then added, "and Nao." Natsuki felt a tiny surge of victory when the familiar flicker of annoyance flashed in Shizuru's eyes at the mention of the redhead. That meant Shizuru still didn't like Nao, which meant she was still jealous. Which meant she STILL loved Natsuki. That's a relief.

Shizuru nodded slowly. "I see…" How should Shizuru feel about Natsuki going out partying with Nao? I should feel fine, because I trust Natsuki and I know they are just friends. "The semi-final festivals do get rather crazy, Natsuki." The woman shifted a bit, not liking how they weren't touching at all. It reminded her of the beginning of the year, when she had to fight with herself over giving Natsuki small, affectionate touches. She had never felt so awkward before… especially just because she was standing a few feet away from her love, that was looking at her with such accusatory eyes.

Natsuki gave a nonchalant shrug. She also felt uncomfortable. Usually she was all over her teacher, her hands wrapped around the women's waist, her head resting on the crook of Shizuru's neck. Now she was standing with her arms feeling awkward, hanging at her sides with nothing to do. She clasped her hands behind her back and said, "I'll be careful. Why don't you come?"

Shizuru smiled, glad Natsuki wanted her to come. The smile became apologetic and she shook her head slowly, her chestnut hair swishing from side-to-side as she did so. "I would love to but I cannot…" She frowned and gestured to herself.

Natsuki looked her teacher up and down, not getting it. She quirked a brow. "Why not?" Hanging out with Alyssa?

A small giggle escaped red lips and Shizuru dared take a step closer to her student, who was acting more cautious than a trapped animal. Natsuki didn't move an inch. Shizuru sent Natsuki a soothing smile, trying to soften her gaze, show her that she meant no harm. "Teachers aren't really supposed to know what's going on…" Shizuru explained. She understood that Anh and Rauschenberg would probably hit up the party… but technically they weren't allowed to and shouldn't. "I am your teacher and you are my student, it would look suspicious would it not? But I would love to see you afterwards… unless you are—"

"Drunk?" Natsuki asked with a small grin. She assumed Nabatame and Nao would make sure of that.

Shizuru frowned slightly. "Yes. If you are free afterwards and not intoxicated I would love to see you." The next day after these kinds of parties usually consisted of the teachers walking around, waking up students that had passed out all over campus. The Dining Hall would be full of kids complaining of hangovers. Shizuru sighed. "Alyssa and I were going to just watch a movie tonight, so I'll be in my room all night. I know I said my room is off-limits, but if you need me… I will be there. Please be careful," she requested, her tone pleading. She took another step closer, her fingers digging into her palms to prevent her hands from reaching out.

Of course Shizuru would be hanging out with Alyssa tonight. Of course. "I will…" Natsuki too was struggling with this. Shizuru didn't… she didn't seem any different. She still loved Natsuki, so then was Natsuki imagining everything? "You… never congratulated me on making it to the final match," Natsuki pointed out after a moment.

Shizuru, unable to take it anymore, crossed the gap between them in one wide stride and pulled the girl to her. Natsuki made a surprised sound but the feeling of being in Shizuru's arms once more took her over and she didn't pull away despite that being her first instinct. Instead she wrapped her arms around the woman, albeit a bit hesitantly at first. Shizuru noticed the hesitation on Natsuki's part, but that only made her hold Natsuki to her tighter.

I am such a sap, Natsuki realized. I can't believe I thought it was normal for someone to hang out so much—alone—with their former lover. Is this Shizuru feeling guilty?

Natsuki gave in to Shizuru's warmth. God it was so comforting, so real. There was no way this amazing force in Natsuki's life could be bad… could have done something hurtful. The student practically collapsed into Shizuru's body. Fingers clutched desperately at the back of Shizuru's uniform, as if Natsuki were clinging to her teacher for dear life. Her head rested under Shizuru's chin, her cheek firmly planted at the bottom of Shizuru's throat. Warmth. She wanted to let it envelope her forever and never let go. Love me and only me. Please, don't let me go. Don't do this to me.

Shizuru was quite possibly the most unexpected toxin Natsuki had ever come in contact with. She hungered for it, thirsted for just a taste. But a part of her told her no, this was wrong. Shizuru was doing something wrong.

"God, Natsuki," Shizuru breathed. The way she whispered Natsuki's name sounded so desperate, so pleading. She could feel the girl's need in the way she clutched at Shizuru's uniform. "Please tell me… tell me what is wrong…" Shizuru requested quietly against the dark locks of her student's head. Her eyelids fluttered closed as she listened to Natsuki's breathing, how it got faster. Shizuru could almost hear the girl's heart beat increase, could feel the smaller body tense in her hold.

Shizuru had almost kissed Alyssa, had possibly done… worse things last night. This was all a trap, the warmth was all a cleverly disguised trick. Natsuki had to escape.

Natsuki pulled away from Shizuru's 'hug' and took a few steps backwards. Shizuru stared wide-eyed at the fury burning within the deep forest green of Natsuki's eyes.

Shizuru almost kissed Alyssa. She would have if Anh hadn't stopped them. Last night… last night Natsuki saw... she heard… she witnessed Shizuru and Alyssa!

I trusted you! The words were loud, her inner voice raw with emotion and hurt. My God, I had trusted you, I ONLY trusted you and now what do I have? The words were only in Natsuki's heart, ripping apart the insides so that they could be free, be heard.

Once more a familiar thump, thump, thump of some imaginary person hammering Natsuki's heart with a sledgehammer rung in the student's ears.

"Nothing is wrong," Natsuki said coldly as she looked Shizuru up and down with a look bordering between anger and disgust. "I have to get going," Natsuki grumbled as she gave Shizuru a quick salute. She couldn't be here, couldn't deal with this right now. Later. Later she'd deal with Shizuru and her goddamn infidelity issues. Natsuki turned around to leave.

"Na-Natsuki wait," Shizuru said quickly as she grabbed Natsuki's shoulder, effectively stopping the younger girl. The student turned her head and looked over her shoulder, her face expressionless.

"Yeah?" Natsuki asked, her eyes lowering to the hand on her shoulder. Shizuru slowly removed it when she saw it was obviously unwanted.

Crimson eyes honed in on Natsuki's slightly quivering lips. This girl, while appearing completely indifferent on the outside, was actually raging about something on the inside. She could barely contain it. Shizuru exhaled slowly before saying, "I will see you tomorrow? At our secret room?"

"Is it still ours?" Natsuki asked, venom dripping from every word.

Choked silence.

Shizuru opened her mouth to speak but no words came. Finally she was able to whisper her answer, "Of course…"

Natsuki huffed, looking somewhat pleased. "Good," she said bluntly as she turned once more and stalked towards the door. Just as she reached for the doorknob, the door swung open, revealing Colonel Alyssa Searrs.

"Oh, Kuga, leaving already?" The blonde asked as she looked down at Natsuki then to where Shizuru stood. The Kyoto-woman looked completely baffled. Alyssa quirked a brow in her friend's direction, physically asking why Shizuru looked so confused.

"Yeah," Natsuki said as she shoved past Alyssa, "I'm leaving."

Alyssa normally wouldn't have tolerated someone shoving into her on purpose, but she let it slide. She turned as she watched Natsuki throw open the door and shut it behind her. No one spoke until the sounds of Natsuki's boots disappeared down the hall.

Alyssa strode over to Shizuru, who now looked placid, her crimson settled calmly on the exit her student had just disappeared through. "What was that?" Alyssa asked. "Did you… tell her?"

Shizuru bit her lip and met Alyssa's sharp blue eyes. "Not exactly…"

The blonde colonel sighed. "You have to tell her, Shizuru," she said as she sat back on Shizuru's desk. She picked up her assault rifle and then reached for a dirtied yellow rag, which she then furiously rubbed against her gun. "It's not fair to her."

Shizuru walked around the side of the desk and dropped down into her chair. She rubbed at her temples, her eyes fluttering closed. "I know," she whispered quietly. "I didn't… I don't think it was the right time."

It's not fair to me either, the blonde thought. Alyssa frowned down at the lieutenant, saw Shizuru wasn't in the mood to be scolded, and then turned her attention to her gun once more. She began to vigorously rub a rag against it. "Shine for me, baby."

---

Natsuki, eyes narrowed, jaw tightened, nails digging into her palms, stomped across Garderobe's campus. She passed the fountain, where many students were just messing around. Some students noticed it was her and waved. Some yelled, "See you tonight, Kuga!" Others, "Good job today, Kuga!" Natsuki cast them a small glare and then went back to ignoring the world.

That morning had been warmer than usual, but Natsuki hadn't thought much of it, mostly because she had other things to pay attention to. She soon realized she wasn't feeling the familiar feeling of snow crunching beneath her feet, and when she tilted her head down to look she was surprised to see grass. Sure, it was wet because most of the snow had melted, but it was still green grass. It looked flattened, but it was there.

She smiled. At least she had something to look forward to. She always loved spring. For someone with the title of 'Ice Princess,' Natsuki wasn't a big fan of snow and ice. It was cold, and excuse her but she has had enough coldness in her life. No, she'd be happy if she never saw another flake again.

She then noticed that there was still snow but just not as much as before. The trees were bare. It was just the ground that was either mushy grass or dirty snow. At least the sun was out. Maybe the party wouldn't be so bad, after all, it's not like Natsuki would be freezing. Hey, maybe they could have a bonfire. That'd be cool!

Yes. Distractions were welcome. Anything was welcome at this point.

Natsuki unzipped her tent and briskly walked in. Without even acknowledging the two girls that had been waiting for her she turned around once more and zipped it up again.

"Natsuki," both Nabatame and Nao uttered in surprise. They glanced awkwardly at each other before returning their gazes to the beauty that looked no different than before she left, save maybe a tad angrier.

Natsuki gave them a small smile. It was lopsided and cute but at the same time, it fooled no one. Someone lurked within Natsuki; dark, angry, raging. Nabatame was going to help her let it aaaaaall out. With the aid of some alcohol, of course.

"Have fun?" The third year asked. She was lying with her belly on Natsuki's bed, her head resting on her interlaced fingers and her elbows propped on the mattress. Her feet were lifted in the air behind her, her ankles crossed. She looked ridiculously comfortable. Natsuki was jealous.

"Not really, no," Natsuki grumbled as she slipped off her jacket and threw it at Nao, who grunted as it whacked her in the abdomen. She caught it and sent Natsuki a glare.

Nabatame frowned. She had been hoping Natsuki's meeting with Shizuru actually cleared the air between them. Maybe Shizuru got to explain something… maybe Shizuru could convince Natsuki she loved her. After all, Natsuki had been gone for at least thirty minutes. "What happened?"

Natsuki shrugged, not in the mood to talk. Her body ached, as if the feeling of Shizuru's arms around her left a lingering physical want. An irrefutable need. This was pathetic, especially since Natsuki was the one to break the embrace in her anger.

And with shock, Natsuki realized she had left Shizuru's without one. Single. Kiss.

Maybe it's because she's afraid of hurting me? Natsuki wondered. After all, she had flinched away that morning as if the touch hurt her, though it hadn't.

Or maybe she just really doesn't want to kiss you. You're not Alyssa.

Natsuki stared blankly into her wardrobe, her hand frozen to the mini-wardrobe door.

Nabatame cleared her throat and sat up on Natsuki's bed then slid off the mattress onto the floor. She padded over to Natsuki and removed the girl's hand from the wooden door. Geezus. It wasn't even that cold out and Natsuki's hand still felt as cold as ice.

"While you were gone I sent Nao to go get some stuff for the party," Nabatame said quietly, as if she were afraid of startling the first year.

Natsuki snapped back to reality and turned to blink at Nabatame. "Like what?" She asked curiously. She closed the wardrobe door and leaned her shoulder against it. She felt bad for not looking at Nao, but a part of her felt bad for using the vixen's name to make Shizuru jealous.

The grin that spread across Nabatame's face then was absolutely diabolical, even her dark blue eyes were sparkling with excitement. "Fireworks."

A surprised gasp came from behind Natsuki. It was actually rather cute, and Natsuki turned around to regard the 'I-am-always-bored-and-angry' girl that had made such a sound. Natsuki lifted a brow at Nao, who blushed and looked away.

"I was just excited," Nao defended as she forced herself to meet the amused gazes of the two dark-haired girls by Natsuki's wardrobe. "Seriously, I bet you Tomoe's party-goers won't have fireworks."

Nabatame nodded enthusiastically. "You got that right. I'm a third year, so I got connections. Rauschenberg used to let me and Tanaka out of Garderobe all the time with little permission slips and all that. Then we became the best of the best, so leaving Garderobe is like a privilege." She winked. "Frank's Fireworks, gotta love Fuuka City."

Natsuki, feeling genuinely excited over something, chuckled and offered Nabatame a high-five. Nabatame slapped her palm against Natsuki's and then pointed to the several large paper bags atop Nao's bed. Natsuki blinked, she hadn't realized those were there.

"Fireworks, booze..." Nao tugged one of the bags to her and peeked in. "Even those annoying noise-makers people get out for New Year's."

"Perfect," Nabatame whispered excitedly.

Perfect. Just like Alyssa Searrs.

Nabatame, sensing Natsuki was once more spacing out, quickly threw her arm around the girl and walked her towards Nao's side of the room. "Help us carry this stuff to the lake, Natsuki," Nabatame said.

Natsuki, thoughts forgotten (and my what bliss it was), happily grabbed onto the largest bag and gave the 'I'm ready' nod to Nabatame.

"Let's get this party started."

---

Two hours later and the entire area around the usual side of the lake was practically a mass of writhing bodies. The music was so loud that Natsuki was sure she would be deaf by the end of the night. She was leaning against something, a plastic cup in her hand filled with some kind of alcohol. Rum, beer, vodka, tequila? She didn't much care, but it was doing a great job of making her feel numb. Not in the bad way, in the really good way.

The sun was now disappearing between distant mountains and over the tops of the trees all the way across the other side of the lake. Luckily there was virtually no wind, so while it was nippy out, it wasn't unbearably cold. Besides, there were multiple fires set up all around the bank of the lake, if someone wanted to get warm all they had to do was dance or drink next to it. Simple.

Natsuki had lost track of Mai, Chie, Aoi, Nao, and Sasaki. Nabatame had been at her side seconds ago, but now even the third year was lost amongst the swirling mass of faceless bodies. Natsuki squinted as she tried to make out the faces of her friends. She couldn't find any. Oh well, all she needed was her drink. Relaxation, this was actually kind of nice.

She was so proud of herself. She hadn't thought of Shizuru once.

Oh crap.

"Damn it," Natsuki growled as she slammed her palm into her forehead repeatedly, as if she could knock the image of her teacher out of her head. "Get the fuck out, woman!"

"Um, excuse me?" A girl Natsuki didn't know asked as she came to an abrupt stop right in front of the famed competitor. Natsuki Kuga was a winner, Natsuki Kuga was gorgeous.

Natsuki blinked and looked up. The slightly taller girl in front of her looked eerily familiar. And then it clicked. The hazel eyes, the light brown hair that was just a shade darker than Shizuru's, the small smile dancing on full lips. Natsuki frowned then, this girl was a bitch, that was the other little tidbit of information that Natsuki remembered about this girl besides the fact that she appeared to be a model. A bully. At least, she had been. Hopefully Natsuki had gotten her to right her ways.

"You… you're that girl Kato was about to kill before—"

"You came to the rescue, yes," the girl purred. Natsuki swallowed. She wasn't interested, not in anyone.

Natsuki, emerald eyes locked with hazel, took an almost pathetic sip from her cup. She swallowed the liquid and loved the burning feeling of it sliding down her throat. Seriously, what the hell has she been drinking? "Well are you enjoying…" Natsuki gestured all around her with her free hand and then shrugged, "this?"

The girl, the girl Natsuki didn't even know the goddamn name of, gave Natsuki a mischievous smile. Natsuki swallowed. "I'd be enjoying it more if you and me went somewhere a little more… private… I'd like to properly thank you for that night…"

Natsuki's eyes widened and her head accidently whacked backwards into whatever she was leaning against. Embarrassed, Natsuki turned to glare at the offending object. She blinked as the tall, looming stone arch stood before her. Oh. She had been leaning up against that annoying piece of architecture? Well screw you Mr. Stone Arch. Sasaki and Tanaka were right, this damn thing is cursed. She gave it a small kick and then turned around again, the smoldering hazel eyes still staring at her expectantly.

"What do you say, Kuga?" The girl proposed, a sleek brow lifting.

Natsuki opened her mouth to reject, reject, reject. That is… until she thought about it some more. She really could make out with this girl. She paused, looked the girl up and down, and then swallowed once more. This girl did not just want to 'make out.' Several people all around them were making out in the open. This girl wanted to go somewhere private.

The girl, growing confident when she could see Natsuki actually considering her offer, glided closer and tilted the younger girl's face up with a lone finger. Natsuki stared up into hazel eyes, her own eyelids lowering slightly. "I'd really like to see some of your moves."

"Lame," Nao growled as she tugged the girl backwards with a hand to her shoulder and practically flung her backwards. The girl let out a yelp and fell onto her back onto the somewhat wet ground. Nao sent the third year a dismissive look over her shoulder. "Don't you have somewhere to be, hussy?"

The girl's eyes flashed with anger as she stood up. She looked like she was about to pummel Nao, except Nabatame came up from behind her and popped her chock full O' tranquilizer.

Natsuki blinked as the third year that had been hitting on her dropped to the ground, unconscious. Nao and Nabatame looked nonchalant as they exchanged 'job well done' looks. Wow. Her friends had her back.

Nabatame, looking bored as she ignored the girl she had just downed, lifted a brow at a smirking Nao and a confused looking Natsuki. "Did I miss something?" The third year gave an innocent look, as if she really had no idea what she had just stumbled upon.

Nao thumb-pointed to Natsuki. "Our fearless competitor over here is getting more ass offers than a toilet seat."

The blue-eyed private first class snickered. "Not surprised, Kuga's hot."

Nao glanced over at a now blushing Natsuki and tilted her head, as if she were considering the words. "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Will you two shut the hell up?!" Natsuki barked. She even stomped her foot like a child.

Nabatame chuckled and waved her hand in the air. "Chill. Drink. Be merry. Tonight is going to be a good night, Kuga."

And watching the third year, Natsuki could tell she was right. Tonight was going to be a good night. Natsuki wanted to get lost in it, let it swallow her whole. She lifted her cup. "To Garderobe," she said with a big, slightly tipsy smile on her lips.

Nao grinned like the devil she was and lifted her cup against Natsuki's. "To you kicking Tomoe's ass in the final round!" She yelled, and a chorus of yells from all around the lake followed as they heard Nao's toast and agreed vehemently.

Natsuki looked around, noticing everyone had stopped what he or she was doing to lift his or her cups in the air to join the toast. It felt like a hundred pairs of eyes were on her, silently watching.

Nabatame lifted her cup and hit Natsuki's and Nao's gently. She winked. "To NATSUKI KUGA!"

Once more, all the students that had turned out to support Natsuki rather than Tomoe all cheered so loudly it vibrated through Natsuki's chest and left her breathless and her ears ringing.

"TO KUGA!"

Alcohol poured down the throats of the students. Somewhere, the blonde master sergeant was whistling innocently pretending not to notice the havoc Nabatame and Natsuki were about to reign upon her school.

Sending Tanaka on a mission was a bad idea, Haruka thought as she rubbed at her temples. For the love of God she was at least a 4-minute walk away from the lake and she could still hear the goddamned ruckus and hollering. She had no idea why Natsuki would be acting up though. Shizuru was the one that kept that delinquent in check, and as far as she was concerned, weren't Natsuki and her lieutenant on, er, good terms?

Without Tanaka around Haruka realized Nabatame was a loose cannon, ready to party it up. Either because she was naturally this way or because she was looking to distract herself from the fact that Tanaka was gone, Haruka wasn't exactly sure. She figured it was a mixture of both, since Nabatame had nearly gotten kicked out of the school when she first arrived. Haruka herself hadn't been sergeant at the time, just captain, but she had remembered seeing the girl. She was full of potential, full of raw talent. It was just… she had been hard to contain. That is, of course, until she had met Tanaka. Haruka soon moved them into the same tent. One didn't speak the native language and one had issues with authority but at least they seemed to help each other.

Tanaka had calmed Nabatame, one could say tamed her. Tanaka even helped Nabatame when it came to strategizing, since that was the girl's hardest subject. Nabatame had helped Tanaka with the language barrier and even helped with some combat moves, since Tanaka had trouble occasionally with the more difficult maneuvers. It was all a very nice partnership.

Of course, Haruka didn't expect them to screw each other, but what could you do?

The blonde master sergeant sat quietly by herself on the edge of Garderobe's fountain, the one in the center of Garderobe's campus and right near all the important buildings. Today she just wanted to be alone, relax. It wasn't even that cold out, which was a nice surprise.

A weak smile graced her lips as she thought of her friend. I'll get you back, Yukino. Don't worry. I'm Haruka Suzushiro, nothing takes what's mine and gets away with it!

More cheers erupted from the forest. Just above the tops of the trees, small projectiles flew at alarming speeds into the air. They burst into brilliant displays of colors and shapes. Fireworks.

Haruka, instead of popping a blood vessel over the illegal use of such things on her campus, smiled. That Nabatame. Always causing trouble.

The reason she had liked Natsuki so much in the beginning? Because she had seen the same kind of potential, the raw talent that could make a student number one. Delinquents or not, there was something in the rebellious ones that made them tough as nails, gave them the kind of unwavering determination and persistence that made them the perfect soldiers.

Good luck, Kuga.

---

Natsuki stared, eyes wide with excitement and mouth slightly agape in wonder as the colors spilled across the sky and then disappeared just moments later. "Another," she whispered excitedly to Nabatame, who merely chuckled and pulled out her lighter.

The music had stopped and now everyone was staring upwards, transfixed by the brilliant flickering lights and patterns created by a simple firework. Nabatame sure knew what to buy.

"Here it goes…" Nabatame whispered, her tone excited. She stood up. "Step back," she warned with a slight teasing tone.

Natsuki did indeed step back, absolutely giddy. Alcohol was great. Music was great. Nao was great. Nabatame was great. FIREWORKS WERE FUCKING GREAT. "Like… Frosted Flakes…" Natsuki suddenly murmured.

Nao glanced at her. "Huh?"

Natsuki turned to meet her redheaded friend's confused stare. "Huh, what?"

Nao smiled a bit at the completely dense expression on Natsuki's face. "God… how do you get by?" Nao wondered out loud. This managed to confuse Natsuki even more, causing her forehead to wrinkle and her bottom lip to protrude a barely noticeable bit. That is, if someone were paying attention to her lips in the first place.

Nao cleared her throat and quickly looked away from Natsuki, her head tilting back so that she could get a better view of the sky.

Natsuki took in Nao's profile. "You know, Nao," Natsuki said with a goofy smile. Nao reluctantly looked away from the sky again and her eyes, not nearly as glassy as Natsuki's, settled on Natsuki's bright emeralds. Natsuki leaned closer, her eyelids lowering. Nao had the urge to step back but didn't. Green eyes flickered with pure and utter mischief. "You're kinda hot."

Nao's cheeks flushed red and she opened her mouth to yell some kind of insult at her chuckling roommate but could find no words. Finally she huffed and looked upwards once more.

The sky exploded with the color crimson. No. It was much too bright to be crimson. Natsuki looked confused for a second. Everything was usually crimson, or at least it was supposed to be. Though, she had to admit…

The bright red sparkled brightly against the night sky. The sparks fell downwards until disappearing completely. This red was a nice shade too.

Mai came up, drunkenly swaying from side to side as she carelessly fell into Natsuki's hold. "Natsuki are you being good?" Mai asked, just like the concerned mother she was.

Natsuki blinked at the busty mother in her arms. Natsuki was holding Mai as if they had just tangoed and Natsuki was holding Mai's upper half off the ground. "Never!" Natsuki declared loudly as she helped Mai stand up and placed her hands on the drunken girl's shoulders, to prevent her from losing her balance again. "Where did you, Chie, and Aoi go off to?"

Mai's violet eyes were distant though she was looking directly at Natsuki. "Natsuki, you are so pretty. You could really have any guy… it's such a shame you like chicks…" Mai shook her head slowly, completely disregarding the appalled expression on her friend's face. "I mean, don't take this the wrong way, it's great that you and girls and yeah, GIRL POWER. But what I'm sa-saying… is…" Mai paused and then narrowed her eyes as if she were trying to focus on what she was about to say next. Natsuki was very sure she didn't want to know what was coming next. "I MEAN, YOUR CHILDREN WOULD BE SO GOODLOO—"

"Shut your trap, Tokiha!" Natsuki snarled as she slammed her palm over Mai's lips. The redhead looked shocked at the gesture, her eyes wide.

Nabatame padded over, this time Sasaki at her side. She had left the fireworks to the inexperienced Garderobe Prep kids. They had to learn sometime. If one lost a finger or two, no big deal, Nabatame was sure you only needed a few to fire a gun anyways.

"Hey we should go do something fun," Nabatame said when Natsuki had turned to look at her. Mai too, though she wasn't really paying attention.

Sasaki chimed in with, "And by 'fun' she means 'crazy.'"

"I'm always up for crazy," Nao said with a grin. She downed a shot and let out an, "Ahh."

"Yeah," Chie agreed as she appeared out of nowhere. She, unlike everyone else, didn't look buzzed in the slightest. In fact, she looked completely sober. Upon all the curious glances, Chie just shrugged, flashed a grin, and said, "Chie Harada can handle any amount of alcohol."

Sasaki quirked a brow. "I think we should test that theory…"

Nabatame chuckled but then shook her head. "Let's do something fun first, I don't want to kill Chie from alcohol poisoning just yet."

"Like?" Natsuki asked. She was pretty sure she was already having fun.

Everyone went silent as they thought of something 'fun' to do.

Finally, Nao looked up, a thoughtful expression on her face. "We can infiltrate Tomoe's party," she suggested, her eyes widening in fear when everyone stared at her as if she were God.

"Nao!" Natsuki exclaimed excitedly, her hands finding Nao's cheeks and forcing the shocked redhead to meet her sparkling green eyes. Nao smiled, glad Natsuki was happy once more, even if it was probably only temporary. "THAT IS THE BEST IDEA EVER. I could kiss you now!"

And, Natsuki did. It didn't really count. She leaned in, lightly pecked a stunned Nao on the lips, and then turned to the rest of her friends, who also didn't seem to find anything wrong with the gesture. It had been an excited kiss, between friends. Nothing to worry about.

Nao licked her lips and stayed silent as her friends plotted. I need another drink. And drink she did.

---

Anh was watching, incredibly impressed as Rauschenberg chugged down her sixth beer in a row. "That is some serious skill there, woman," Anh breathed, eyes wide as Harris wiped at her mouth with her sleeve and winked.

"You owe me…" she swayed a bit on a her feet, "twenty bucks."

Anh gasped, as if offended. "I thought the deal was five bucks."

"Hell no, Lu! You're not conning me out of my money," Rauschenberg grumbled.

The two Council members stared at each other long and hard. And then they burst out laughing.

"M-Man," Anh said through chuckles, "Haruka would kiiiill us if she knew we were here." She straightened, smile still on her face, as she scanned the raging party quickly. "Ah, wait, we've lost sight of Private Sexy Pants…"

Harris frowned and turned around to follow Anh's purple gaze. Brown eyes flickered from right to left. Her frown deepened. "I told you not to get distracted! Shizuru is gonna be pissed… which means Alyssa is going to come after us."

Anh, remaining calm, folded her arms over her chest and leaned her back against the tree she was currently enjoying the 'shade' of. "Frankly, I could care less what Alyssa thinks right now."

Harris sighed and she cast Anh a sidelong glance. "Hey, last time I checked you could've had her. You could've had her years ago."

Anh bit her bottom lip and then tightened her jaw as she thought about it. "I don't want her." She sighed and ran her hand through her light brown hair. "What she and Shizuru are doing… it's bad."

"Well, sorry to break it to you, Lu," Harris said with a sigh that mimicked the one Anh just let out a few seconds ago, "But this is just how life works."

The colonel caught sight of Private Sexy Pants and her band of misfits leaving the party area. She smirked, knowing that the fact that Nabatame and Natsuki were in the lead meant they were about to have some good ol' fashioned Garderobe fun. They'd come back eventually. Anh didn't feel the need to pursue.

"Shizuru doesn't know what she's doing, and Alyssa? Alyssa is being her usual, overly competitive self and doesn't realize it, like usual.I like Private Sexy—I like Natsuki," Anh said with a sigh. "They should tell her… the earlier the better."

Harris suddenly dropped to the ground, not caring that she was now sitting in wet grass. Uniform be damned, she wanted to sit so she was going to sit! Anh, liking the idea, took a seat next to her. Harris took a chug of beer and then let out an, "Ahhh." They sat there in the darkness of the trees, their eyes watching the fun going on a few yards away.

"I'm sure Kuga will understand eventually," Harris said weakly, she was beginning to see Anh's point.

"After what she's been through? I don't think so. She really doesn't need this right now," Anh said seriously. She glanced at Rauschenberg and added, "She's insecure around Alyssa. As I said, this is bad."

"So maybe you should tell Kuga if you're so heated about it," Harris suggested, though she didn't expect Anh would take the comment seriously.

Anh considered it for a moment. She could. She really could. She finally shook her head. "No. You were right. This isn't my life, isn't my student. I'm not getting involved with another. If Alyssa wants to continue screwing stuff up to spite me then fine."

What the hell had happened between Anh and Alyssa recently, Harris wondered. Rauschenberg merely hummed in response, her eyes staring out across the writhing bodies. Did these people even notice their honorary host and her close friends were missing?

---

By the time the sounds of Tomoe's equally raging party were heard, Natsuki, Nabatame, Chie, Nao, and Sasaki were all giggling like little maniacs. They all had their pistols out, ready to tranquilize the shit out of Tomoe's partygoers.

Tomoe was having her party in Shizuru's tent sector. People were moving from tent to tent, people were outside the tent dancing. They didn't have fireworks.

"Their party just lost maaaaaaajor cool points," Sasaki drawled. She pointed to the sky and met Nabatame's blue eyes with her brown ones. "Do you see fireworks, Private Nabatame?" She asked, a sly smile forming on her lips.

"No I do not, Private Sasaki," Nabatame replied with a smirk as she pulled out the firework she had been saving in case this very occasion had shown up. She had actually had it for two years, a gift from her father. She had gotten most of her crazy from him, as it were.

Natsuki eyed it warily. "What the hell is that thing?" It was shaped almost like a rocket. It was white with blue stripes and it was much larger than the other fireworks Nabatame had fired off before.

Nabatame grinned, pulled a finger up to her lips to signal that Natsuki shouldn't ask such silly questions, and then stuck the firework into the ground. She held her hand out to Sasaki. "Light me," she demanded.

Sasaki instantly fumbled around for Nabatame's lighter. "Goddamn it," she muttered. Finally her fingers closed around the rectangular device and she handed the blasted thing to her best friend. "Fire away, Captain!"

Nabatame snickered and attempted to light the little string at the end of the firework. "Man I've been waiting for this forever…"

Finally, the small white string lit on fire, the small flame quickly consuming the rope and heading for its special destination.

"Everyone back up!" Chie yelled, but not loud enough for the people in Shizuru's tent sector to hear. They were standing right outside it, their bodies huddled behind the tent closest to Anh's tent sector.

Natsuki grabbed Nao and pulled her backwards. "Be careful," Natsuki whispered to the redhead, who pretended that Natsuki wasn't holding her protectively. Stupid thoughts. Stupid, drunken thoughts.

Nabatame and Natsuki exchanged evil grins. A loud popping noise was heard and, like a rocket, the firework shot into the sky, a blazing red beacon of glimmering hope. Please be something good, Natsuki thought, her eyes following it higher and higher into the sky. It went higher then all the other, cheaper looking fireworks Nabatame had used.

Finally, it exploded.

In burning bright blue letters that lit up the night sky, the words, "YOU SUCK," were spelled out for everyone to see. Tomoe's partygoers all stopped what they were doing, the music coming to an abrupt halt, as they tilted their heads back to stare at the insult in the sky.

Natsuki burst out into laughter, as did everyone else in her mini-invasion force. Natsuki was clutching onto Nao, their bodies shaking with intense giggles. Tears sprung forth from their eyes, and Chie was literally on the ground shaking as if she were having a seizure. Nabatame chuckled and looked proud, her arms on her hip in the classic 'hero' pose.

The partygoers of Tomoe's party all boo'd and started getting angry. Tomoe herself came out of her tent to see what was going on. She bared her teeth and growled like a rabid animal when she saw the words in the sky. She had no idea how she knew, but she knew. Kuga.

Unfortunately, the bright blue words disappeared soon after, but it was a memory Natsuki knew she would cherish for the rest of her life.

"Okay, now let's go shoot Tomoe," Chie suggested as she waved her rifle in the air. "First to tranq her ass gets fifty dollars out of…" Chie's eyes searched her friends and then landed on Natsuki's surprised face. "Natsuki's pocket," she finished.

"What?! Like hell!" Natsuki barked, though she was smiling like a moron still.

Nao shrugged. "It makes sense," she chimed in. "After all, you have to save it for the competition… and it's probably against the rules to attack Tomoe out of the arena anyways at this point. You don't want to risk getting disqualified." She paused then added, "CAN YOU HEAR how goddamned coherent I sound right now? Do you know how much I've drank?" Nao winked. "It's rather impressive."

Nabatame, grinning like a mad woman, tapped the tip of her PM9 to her forehead. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get 'er!" Nabatame was very, very drunk at the moment. She had probably reached Mai's level of drunkenness.

Natsuki reached for her previously discarded can of beer and chugged the rest of it, wanting to be that open, loose, ready to take on the world. She then gave her friends a goofy grin and said, "You guys handle it. Tell—Tell Tomoe's guests that they're welcome to join my party, which is better." She glanced at Nao who was grinning just as devilishly, her eyes glassy. "We'll meet you guys back at the lake."

Nabatame hurrahed and then signaled for Chie and Sasaki to follow her. "We're going in, soldiers!"

"Ma'am, yes ma'am!" Chie and Sasaki yelled as they all pulled out their rifles and followed behind Nabatame, who plowed straight for the raging rival party.

Natsuki and Nao watched their three friends charge through the mass of moving bodies until they could no longer be seen, swallowed completely. "They're gonna do some damaaaage," Nao drawled. "I bet—I bet some of them will come to your party, Na-Natsuki."

Natsuki turned bright emerald eyes on Nao. "You think so, Nao? Do you?"

"Yes!"

The two best friends exchanged grins. "Okay, let's gooo back to my party!" Natsuki announced. She grabbed Nao's hand and marched towards the edge of the forest. "Lake here we come."

---

Nabatame paused in the middle of Tomoe's party, her PM9 ready to go. Chie and Sasaki were right beside her, their rifles out as well. The bodies around them slowly came to a slow stop, like a carousel going around one last time.

Tomoe, who had never returned to her tent upon seeing the embarrassing words in the sky just moments ago, recognized the three girls as supporters of Kuga. She snarled and walked forward until she broke through the circle of her supporters surrounding them.

"What do you three morons want?" The star student of Garderobe asked. "You're unwelcome here."

Nabatame snickered as she let her face drop just a bit, giving her the intimidating look of someone with shadows covering half their features. "We just dropped by to say 'hi,'" Nabatame explained with a big, wide grin that made Tomoe a bit uneasy. After all, this was Garderobe's top student.

"Well you can leave or you can get shot," Tomoe said with a carefree shrug. "I'd prefer you stay, I'd love to sink a tranq into your pretty little head," she said, her tone threatening and her grey eyes sparkling with danger.

Nabatame lifted a brow. "Aw, you called me pretty. I'm touched."

Chie shrugged, leaned over to Nabatame, and whispered, "Well you are pretty hot…"

Sasaki slammed the heel of her boot down on Chie's foot. "Don't interrupt her when she's being badass," she hissed. The spectacled girl gave an apologetic look before clearing her throat and once more putting on her 'serious business' face. Also known as her 'I'm a chick with a gun,' face.

Nabatame sent her two friends an amused glance before lifting her PM9 and aiming it straight at Tomoe. "Looks like I got you, star student."

Tomoe frowned slightly. She really would hate to get tranquilized in front of her supporters. Especially because she hadn't known she had so many.

"AS A SIDE NOTE," Nabatame suddenly yelled, the crazy drunk pouring back into her blue eyes, "EVERYONE HERE WHO DOESN'T REALLY THINK TOMOE IS ALL THAT CAN HEAD OVER TO THE LAKE. THERE IS A RAGING PARTY GOING ON IN HONOR OF NATSUKI KUGA. BE THERE OR BE LAME."

A few of the partygoers who had stopped to watch the conflict unfold ended up shrugging and ditching Tomoe's party. Soon, when it became clear that the music wasn't going to start up again until Tomoe was satisfied that these 'Natsuki-Supporters' were gone, more and more people began leaving for Natsuki's party.

Tomoe growled at them. Traitors. "If you leave, you don't come back!" She yelled angrily.

"Uncool, lady," some random student said as he shook his head at Tomoe's threat and began walking away.

Tomoe drew her pistol and shot at him, which is exactly when Nabatame shot her.

Tomoe dropped to the snow. She'd miss the rest of her 'party.'

"Woohoo!" Nabatame squealed happily. "Guess who gets fifty bucks from Kuga?" She whirled around and grinned at Chie and Sasaki. "That'd be meee," she sang.

Chie blinked. "DUCK!" She yelled suddenly, and all three girls dropped to the ground as tranquilizers whizzed overhead.

"WAR!" Sasaki yelled into the night as she lifted from her ducked position and began firing tranquilizers into everyone and anyone she could hit. A good Tomoe supporter was a tranquilized Tomoe supporter.

For a good while, the only thing that could be heard were the chorus of students drawing their pistols and shooting anyone that came near them, unsure who was a part of the 'Natsuki-invasion team' and who wasn't. Sure, they didn't know it had only been those three girls, but that only made it easier for Nabatame, Chie, and Sasaki to sneak off and pick Tomoe's partygoers off one by one.

---

"We're looooost," Nao grumbled, the haze in her eyes and the lack of coordination making her stumble and trip over almost every log that lay in her path. Natsuki was up ahead, her hands shoving several branches out of her face as she continued heading in the direction she could've sworn the lake was in.

"A-Are you sure?" Natsuki questioned as she spun around just in time to see Nao get whacked in the face with a branch. The midnight beauty tried to hold back a laugh at the disgruntled Nao, who now had a few leaves in her hair.

"Don't l-l-laugh at me you damned annoying—" Nao paused. Whenever she had trouble thinking of insults she knew she was drunk.

Natsuki only laughed harder, tears springing forth from her eyes once more. "Hahaha! Oh man it feels greeeeat to laugh at YOUR misfortune for once, Nao-Nao."

"Don't call me that, Kuga-bear," Nao countered, a malicious smile tugging at her lips at the look of pure horror on Natsuki's face at the nickname.

"Take that back!"

"No!"

"Yes!" It suddenly felt like they were back at their Survival Hike, arguing over who should read the map, about to pummel each other, falling right into—

Nao and Natsuki were snarling in each other's face at this point. The redheaded vixen poked her finger into Natsuki's chest. "You got us lost, again!" She let out an uncharacteristic whimper. Natsuki loved a drunken Nao.

"That was your fault," Natsuki countered, her nose very nearly touching Nao's. "If I remember correctly—"

"You don't remember correctly, because you're as dense as the log we fell off of that day!" Nao snapped back, her fists clenched at her sides.

"Yeah?" Natsuki growled back, wondering if she were about to have her first drunken fight. "Well you're as…" she paused, her blank eyes finding the leaf still in Nao's hair. Natsuki giggled and picked it out, holding it up in front of Nao's face. "Pretty as this leaf," Natsuki finished with a victorious grin. She had managed to make Nao blush.

Nao swiped the leaf out of Natsuki's hands and crumpled it, letting it glide down in pieces to the floor. Natsuki looked down to watch it sadly, her lower lip protruding slightly as she pouted a bit. Nao tilted Natsuki's face so that they were staring into each other's eyes.

"Stop saying stupid things like that, you dumb mutt."

"Why?" Natsuki asked, drunken cluelessness clear in those dim eyes.

"Because then—" Nao grinned like a fool, "then I'll do something like this!" And she leaned forward and kissed Natsuki on the lips.

And then Natsuki kissed her back. Nao, not expecting that, even in her drunken state of mind, pulled back to stare wide-eyed at Natsuki. Every rule of the universe said that Natsuki should be running away, flailing her arms, and screaming that someone had kissed her. That's what Nao had been going for in the first place!

"What?" Natsuki asked dumbly, her eyes half-lidded. "Why'd you stop?"

Nao blinked, unsure herself. She shrugged and grabbed Natsuki's face between her hands. They kissed again, this time the kiss was sloppier, wetter. They were both drunk off their asses and so their kissing skills weren't really up to par.

Natsuki fell backwards over a rock and landed with a thud, Nao on top of her.

"Ow," Natsuki howled, and she opened her eyes to see the incredibly intoxicated Nao staring back down at her. The vixen straddled Natsuki's hips and began unbuttoning her own uniform top.

"Whoooa, Nao," Natsuki slurred as she made no movement to stop her friend. After all, Nao was unbuttoning her own shirt, not Natsuki's, so Natsuki saw no problem with it. Something in the back of her fuzzy mind told her to stop, this was wrong. Or, at the very least, bad. Not good.

Nao's uniform top was now open, revealing simply nothing underneath save a pink bra. Natsuki was rather surprised by this. Sure, most of the snow had melted, but it wasn't that warm out. She herself was at least wearing something under her uniform top.

Nao's head descended and their lips met once more. Natsuki felt utterly careless as she kissed a very forward Nao with just as much force. Nao let out a small whimper, when Natsuki tried to move back. Kuga's hands slid down Nao's bare sides as Nao's made their way to Natsuki's cheeks. The kissing wasn't as sloppy as before. Nao shivered at the feeling of Natsuki's fingertips on her flesh.

And this was truly interesting to Natsuki, who thought Nao's lips were very soft… something she hadn't expected for some odd reason. This kissing was also much more … mature… experienced,than the last time they had kissed. Natsuki had totally freaked out that time. Fair enough, she had been trying to fend off Akio at the time.

Truthfully, Natsuki had often wondered what Nao felt like… what it would be like if she had ended up dating Nao instead, if she had never taken the plunge and instead explored other options. It's not like she had never crushed on anyone before Shizuru, at least not to such an intense extent. Natsuki did feel differently for Nao than she did for her other friends… but did that mean it was a crush or just a different level of "best friends?" She also knew Nao liked her. Or, at least, she had at some point. They never revisited that topic, finding it too awkward to bear.

And suddenly, despite a clouded mind, Natsuki realized she was doing exactly what Shizuru had done to her.

Damn!

"NAO!" Natsuki yelled in alarm after breaking a positively heated kiss, much better than the earlier sloppier ones.

In the scream of her name, some clarity had come back to Nao's own mind and she found herself staring down, practically topless, straddling Natsuki. Double damn!

"NATSUKI!" Nao barked as she quickly covered her chest and stumbled backwards off of her roommate. "THE FUCK WERE YOU TRYING TO DO?" She yelled as she turned her back on her perverted roommate and began buttoning her top back up.

"ME?" Natsuki asked in disbelief. She sat up, groaning when she realizing the entire back of her uniform was wet thanks to the grass that was still wet due to the recently melted snow. "You—YOU WERE ON TOP OF ME!"

"WE ARE NOT TO TELL A SOUL OF THIS!" Nao demanded, now turning around once more since her uniform top was back on. "Ever!"

"I'm never ever drinking again," Natsuki declared. She stared at the hands she had touched Nao with as if they were tainted. "Damn it!" She hissed. "You're a lousy kisser!" Natsuki snapped at the redhead.

The vixen's jaw tightened. "Like you can talk? Kissing you is like kissing a dead person!"

Natsuki, deeply offended, formed an insulted expression before she grunted and folded her arms over her chest. "Screw you Nao!"

"You were about to," came the quick retort. Natsuki opened her mouth to deny, deny, deny when—

"W-We saw nothing!" Came a third-party voice.

Natsuki and Nao, who had been glaring at each other, suddenly looked into the terrified eyes of the other. Someone had seen them? WHY DIDN'T THE PERVERT SAY ANYTHING?

Wait… Natsuki thought with growing fear as she slowly turned to face the direction the voice had come from. She could make out, not one, but four pairs of bright eyes in the darkness, their gazes focused on either her or Nao. Had they said 'we saw nothing?'

"You tell anyone what you just saw," Natsuki tried to sound intimidating despite being drunk out of her mind, "And I'll… I'll kill you!"

"Yeah!" Nao agreed though she was sure she was about to collapse any second. Or throw up. "She'll kill you!"

The owners of the four pairs of eyes high-tailed it out of there, disappearing through the trees to where civilization probably lied.

"L-Let's go," Natsuki mumbled as she sloppily gestured for Nao to follow her out of the woods. She decided to follow in the direction their voyeurs had disappeared in, that meant there was something that way. People, hopefully.

Nao followed behind, but she was just as clumsy as before. Natsuki too, had trouble seeing and moving through the forest. Eventually she turned around to see Nao passed out on the ground. She let out a dejected sigh and then lowered beside her friend's limp body. Scooping her roommate up in her arms, Natsuki began to walk again towards the lake. "Geez, Nao," Natsuki breathed as she adjusted the added weight of Nao's body so that the sleeping girl was easier to carry. "Lay off the Wheaties, damn."

---

The rest of the night was a blur. The students were still dancing to loud music, though it was apparent some had left as the night had gone on. The fires set up all over the side of the lake were dying down, and everyone was too drunk to put more life into them. Natsuki carried Nao around aimlessly for a while, her feet feeling like they were dragging through mud. Nope. She was never drinking again.

Eventually she found Nabatame, who said something about Tomoe and a 'Kuga Invasion' and 'Chie and Sasaki were M.I.A.' At least, that's all that processed through Natsuki's intoxicated mind.

More fireworks were set up, but this time they were sloppy and one ended up landing in a tree, threatening to spark the whole damn thing on fire. Everyone stared in awe, but let out a collective sigh of relief when the spark just died out in the wind.

It was beginning to get cold again, especially when the fires had died out completely and it was hard to see who was who and what was what. There was also the safety risk since people could be walking on the ice-covered lake at anytime and not know it. Natsuki thanked everyone (or at least she thinks she did) and told them all to go back home.

They did.

---

Natsuki's mind barely sparked to life. She barely remembered stumbling into her tent that early morning, Nao in her arms. Right now Natsuki was on her side with her arms around something soft and warm. Shizuru? The name echoed through her head until it woke her up, though she didn't open her eyes. She knew if she opened her eyes it would turn out to be someone else she was holding, not Shizuru.

Life didn't work like that.

She instead snuggled closer to the source of warmth, her arms locked around the waist of whoever it was and her nose tickling the back of the mystery person's neck. Her mind slowly became fuzzy again, and she drifted off into sleep once more.

Another hour or two later and Natsuki was awakened by a splitting headache. "Gnnf," she groaned as she propped herself up on her elbow and sleepily looked around her tent. She felt heavy, like gravity was turned up a few notches and she just wanted to happily fall into her sheets once more.

Someone was in Nao's bed, sprawled across the furniture with one leg hanging over the side and an arm tucked partly under the pillow. Natsuki could tell it wasn't Nao by the dark hair spilling over the side of the mattress. It was much too dark and much too long. It had to be Nabatame.

So if Nabatame is in Nao's bed… Natsuki wondered as she looked around the room once more. Sasaki and Chie were fast asleep on the floor, Chie behind Sasaki and holding her around the waist as if they were spooning, though their bodies were too far apart for it to be considered that. Aoi is going to be pissed, Natsuki idly thought. Then again, everyone was dressed so she wasn't really worried.

But where was Nao?

And then Natsuki remembered she had been hugging something before. She slowly looked down. Lying right beside her was Nao, her back turned on Natsuki and her body curled into herself. It was kind of cute. Ick, Natsuki thought as she shook her head. Nao is not cute. She then remembered what else she and Nao had done while drunk. Oh no. She prayed Nao wouldn't remember, after all, she had been slightly more intoxicated at the time and had passed out shortly after.

A stab of guilt struck Natsuki's core. No, no, I don't have time for that…

Kuga shuddered before turning so that she was sitting sideways on her bed, her feet resting on Nao's back. She then straightened her legs, forcing the redheaded roommate out of her bed and onto the floor with a yelp.

Natsuki laughed wickedly then and scooted across the mattress so that she could peer over the edge of her bed. Nao was now obviously awake, though she looked confused as to why she had fallen onto the floor. When she looked up she saw Natsuki sniggering above her.

"You!" The redhead growled, an accusing finger pointing in Natsuki's direction. "You couldn't have woken me up the nice way?" She then twisted and turned until a satisfying crack was heard.

Natsuki, still watching with amusement at her roommate's frustration, smiled like a Cheshire cat. "There's a nice way to be woken up?"

Nao stood up, dusted her pants off, and then wondered when and how she had changed into her pajamas. "Touché," she muttered as she then walked over and kicked Sasaki in the ribs. "Wake up."

Sasaki winced and glared up at the redhead. "That was uncalled for, you goddamned ginger," she grumbled as she tried to sit up off the floor of a tent that was not hers. She realized arms were around her and were restricting her movement. She blinked before realizing Chie was still asleep. She grumbled as she unlatched the hands clasped around her waist and then scooted away from the still sleeping girl. Brown eyes regarded Chie uneasily. "We're both wearing clothes. Nothing happened," she decided to declare; just in case anyone was wondering.

Natsuki chuckled and nodded. "No one did anything, we're all wearing clothes." Okay well she and Nao had done some things but that was looooooong ago in the past. Yeah. Never needed to be brought up again, nope. Never.

Nao quirked a brow and then decided to kick Chie in the ribs too. The girl instantly turned onto her back, lifted her hands straight up into the air, and made 'squeezing' gestures with her hands. "Boooobs."

Nao rolled her eyes. "Wake up, moron."

Chie opened her left eye a slit to stare up into Nao's blurry face. She couldn't see that well without her glasses. "Remind me to never sleep with you, Nao," Chie said as she stopped fooling around and sat up, her hand attempting to fix her hair, "I'd hate to be woken up with insults."

Nao thumb-pointed to the grinning girl still on the bed behind her. "Then don't sleep with Kuga, she literally kicked me out of the bed."

Chie and Sasaki both chuckled while Natsuki gave Nao, who had sent her a death glare over her shoulder, an apologetic smile. "I couldn't resist," she said with a shrug.

"Where's Nabatame?" Sasaki wondered out loud. She stood up off the ground and stretched quickly. If anything happened to Nabatame, Tanaka would kick Sasaki's ass.

Natsuki lifted a finger and pointed toward Nao's bed. "I think that's her in Nao's bed," she replied. "Wake her up, I want her to go with me somewhere."

Sasaki, after giving Natsuki a sarcastic 'yes, master' look, walked over and hovered her body over the edge of the bed to see if it indeed was Nabatame. Sasaki chuckled and rolled her eyes as she removed the pillow from Nabatame's face. "Hey, Akemi," Sasaki whispered. She waved her hand in front of her friend's face and then, when that didn't seem to work, gave her friend's shoulder a shake.

Nabatame finally opened her eyes. She narrowed her eyes upon seeing the face of her friend. "Sleep…" she grumbled as she turned her back on the other third year. "Come back tomorrow."

Nao, now leaning against the side of Natsuki's bed as she watched the amusing spectacle, grumbled, "That's my bed."

Sasaki sent Nao an apologetic look over her shoulder and then shook the number one student in the academy once more. "Come on, damn it! You can sleep all day tomorrow. Kuga wants you for something."

A grunt. "Fine," the third year said as she begrudgingly sat up. "Ohmygod my head…" the third year squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the throbbing to pass. "Alcohol is bad, kiddies."

Natsuki gave a huff in agreement. "I know. I think we're all a bit hung-over," she murmured as she ran her hand through her silky hair. She let out a groan and then stretched a bit on her bed. "What time is it?"

Chie slowly stood up and then slipped her hand into her pocket. The handsome girl found her phone and flipped it open. She blinked and then cursed. "It's eight O' clock! Me and Aoi were supposed to guard the front gates an hour ago!" She quickly grabbed her rifle from beside the tent entrance and gave a hurried 'see ya!' before disappearing.

Natsuki blinked. Chie had moved like a blizzard. She then processed what Chie said. "Oh shit," she growled as she slid out of bed and stalked to her wardrobe. She began pulling out a fresh uniform. She whirled around and pointed to a lazily lounging Nabatame. The third year still looked half-dead. "Come on, we're going to the bathes house real quick."

Nabatame quirked a dark brow. "We are?"

"Yeah I have training in thirty minutes and I don't want to be late."

Nabatame blinked, still not understanding where she fit into this equation. "Yes, you have training."

Natsuki, new clothes under one arm and various bottles under her other, glanced at Nabatame before walking towards the door. "You're coming with me."

---

"Why are you in such a rush to see her?" Nabatame asked the question that had burned through her mind while she and Natsuki had showered and then gotten ready in silence. They were now crossing the campus towards the Academics building. Natsuki was going to be learning Kiyohime in the comfort of her newly discovered secret room.

Natsuki was silent as she thought it over, her eyes lifting slightly to stare at the clear blue sky. Occasionally they'd walk by the unconscious body of someone who had partied too hard and never made it back to their tent in time. It was quite a mess, but then again, last night had been one hell of a party. Haruka must be going nuts. There were only a few people walking around, though some were still stumbling. Nabatame herself seemed to have trouble walking in a straight line and occasionally would bump into Natsuki.

"Because I…" want her to love me. "I want to learn Kiyohime before the final match."

Nabatame, hands stuffed in her pockets, glanced sideways at the determined first year. "You still want to compete?" she asked. She yawned then rubbed at her eyes in hopes of wiping the drowsiness from them. Nope. She was still hung-over.

"Why wouldn't I?"

Nabatame blinked. "Weren't you fighting for Shizuru?" Focus on your feet, make sure they walk in a straight line… Nabatame mentally whispered to herself. It would suck to knock into Natsuki while she was having her weird 'eureka' moment about Shizuru. At 8:30 in the morning. Nabatame let out a small groan.

Natsuki lowered her head and, growing bored of the sky, stared at the ground instead. "I still am," she murmured. "I don't want to just give up… I want to show her that I am strong without her." Stronger WITH her, maybe, but still strong without.

"Yet you're still going to seek her training," Nabatame deadpanned. She was much too hung-over to say more than one sentence. She had a splitting headache and the only reason she was responding to Natsuki was because she knew she had to. Every bit of her wanted to go back to bed and sleep for at least a week.

"I am so confused right now," Natsuki told her third year friend, who would've been intrigued by what Natsuki was about to say had she been able to process anything. "And angry. I don't want to win her back but I do. I don't even know if she's doing anything behind my back with Alyssa but I do." Natsuki let out a chuckle and then held her palm to her burning hot forehead. "Nothing makes sense anymore. I'm confused all the time." She set her emeralds on Nabatame's sapphires. "Do I love her or do I want her to love me? What's the motivation for everything I'm doing from here on out?" Natsuki was just rambling now. Hangovers apparently had the opposite effect on her than it had on Nabatame. Instead of keeping her answers short and concise she mumbled on about whatever was on her mind non-stop.

The third year blinked as she tried to process everything the first year was saying. Yeah. It was a nice try, but she really couldn't process anything other than Uuugh. She stared blankly at Natsuki. "Wuh?" She groaned out. It was way too early for this. Come back in 6 hours.

Natsuki let out a chuckle at Nabatame's current state as she skipped up the few stone steps and then pulled back one of the large doors leading into the Academic building. She gestured for Nabatame to walk in first and then followed after.

They walked silently down the hall, Nabatame's movements more sluggish than Natsuki's. The hall was empty, so they weren't worried about being seen going into the secret room the public way.

Nabatame paused just outside the door wrongly labeled, 'Janitor's Closet.' Natsuki had explained to her all about this room. Nabatame was excited to see it, the inside, but she hoped there was a couch she could rest on. The things she does for friends. She should get an award for being up right now! Her dark sapphires lifted to meet Natsuki's emeralds. "Are you sure you really want to go in there?" She asked quietly, her hand on the doorknob. Her eyes opened and closed a few times, as if she were still trying to wake her mind up.

Natsuki gave a small nod. "Yeah. I need…" Shizuru. She took a deep breath, green disappearing behind eyelids as her eyes fluttered closed. "Even in the darkness… even if my world is completely shrouded in shadow… Shizuru is all I see." Her eyes opened, and Nabatame inhaled sharply at the fury within them. "Even if I'm not all she sees."

---

The 'secret room' was empty. Shizuru was late? Shizuru was never late. Irrationally, Natsuki was worried for the Kyoto-woman's safety. Rationally, Natsuki figured Shizuru was with Alyssa.

"Whatever," she grumbled as she easily slid onto the plush couch and made herself comfortable. She felt slightly embarrassed, her girlfriend wasn't on time the one time Natsuki would've preferred she were. Nabatame hovered awkwardly by the doorway before sitting down—collapsing next to the first year.

"Where is she?" Nabatame wondered out loud. She glanced at an alarm clock on an end table on the side of the couch and winced at the bright, red numbers. "You said she was supposed to be here by now, right?"

Natsuki folded her arms across her chest and let out a puff of hot air through her nose.

Nabatame watched Natsuki warily before looking all around the room. Her head still hurt and the shower only made her feel marginally better, but at least this little invitation into Natsuki's personal life was interesting. The third year did indeed feel privileged that she was trusted enough by the younger girl to hear about her forbidden love life.

On second thought, why did Natsuki trust her so much? Was it because Nabatame had been the first to tease her about it, point out the obvious relationship in the middle of a match? Had the carefree, 'who cares, it's hot!' attitude given Natsuki some type of comfort to discuss such things with Nabatame?

"This is a nice room…" The third year trailed off, remembering Natsuki had been annoyed that Alyssa had completely redone it. Personally, Nabatame rather liked the modern look. Then again, she wasn't a fan of dust.

Finally the sound of a key in the doorknob caused Natsuki to look towards the door with sick, undisguised glee. Blind devotion. Pathetic.

The door opened, revealing Shizuru in all her beautiful glory. She paused briefly in the doorway, her eyes finding Natsuki's first and then later Nabatame's with some surprise. She had only expected Natsuki.

Shizuru's lips formed a warm smile as her gaze returned to her student.

The heat in the woman's eyes melted Natsuki's core and turned her blood to honey in her veins. The teacher shut the door behind her and turned around to lock it. When finished, she flipped the key back into her pocket and strode elegantly into the room, her movements liquid and graceful.

She paused just in front of the couch. "Ara," she cooed, "Akemi, I did not realize you would be joining us today." There was something wrong. Shizuru sounded wrong. Shizuru was different, definitely different from earlier. Her voice gave it away.

Natsuki fidgeted uncomfortably for a minute on the couch. Half of the reason she brought Nabatame with her was to prove she too could bring someone over to her and Shizuru's 'secret room.' After all, Shizuru had brought Alyssa in the day before. It was supposed to be an 'Ah-hah! Take that, Shizuru!' thing. Natsuki just felt left out. Shizuru refused to look at her.

Nabatame felt slightly uncomfortable, as if she were invading someone's personal space despite being on opposite sides of the couch from Kuga and a few feet away from Fujino. "Er, Natsuki invited me," the third year replied with a shrug. "You can ignore my presence completely, I'll be trying to rid myself of this headache."

Shizuru quirked a brow and concern could be found in the features Natsuki traced wordlessly with her eyes. "Are you alright?" Shizuru asked as she stepped forward and placed the back of her hand gently to Nabatame's forehead. The third year blushed a bit at the gesture and sent Natsuki an apologetic look.

Natsuki shook her head slightly, to show she completely understood blushing in Shizuru's presence. It wasn't uncommon. Natsuki realized Shizuru hadn't looked at her once except for briefly when she walked in. She suddenly wished she had gone farther with Nao. No, that wouldn't have been fair. That's not a way to solve anything. Revenge is wrong… most of the time anyways.

"Yeah, I'm fine Lieutenant. Don't worry about it," Nabatame assured the slightly older woman with a dismissive hand wave. "I can handle it."

Shizuru smirked, her russet colored eyes swirling with amusement. "Partied too hard, Akemi?" She asked as she pulled away from the third year and straightened once more, her eyes flickering only briefly over to the quiet Natsuki before returning to Nabatame.

Natsuki bit her lower lip. Why isn't she looking at me?

The third year chuckled. "You could say that."

Natsuki interjected with, "I have a headache too." Because I partied hard too, how you like them apples, Lieutenant?

Shizuru, as if surprised Natsuki had spoken, slowly turned her head… as if hesitant to lay her eyes on Natsuki. The second she did, Natsuki saw a flicker of pain within them. What? Why was it painful for Shizuru to look at her? Does she feel guilt every time she looks at me? Natsuki wondered.

Shizuru swallowed, and Natsuki recognized the older woman's 'put on a mask' face. "Would you like me to get you something? An aspirin perhaps?" Shizuru asked, her tone quiet. She seemed very off to Natsuki, who blinked at the way Shizuru had oh-so quietly asked.

Nabatame wasn't the only one noticing the abnormality going on between the two of them. Her lips pursed into a thin line when she glanced sideways to the expression on Natsuki's face, which was that of a severely confused girl. What the hell is going on, Lieutenant?

"Nah," Natsuki said through an awkward cough. She avoided the crimson eyes, finding that they confused her more than she already was. Why was Shizuru acting so odd? The red Natsuki loved was lacking its usual luster, missing its lovely shine.

"Man, Nao has a comfy bed," Nabatame said as she stretched like a dog and looked as content as a lazing cat. She opened her right eye just a slit to peek at the expression on Shizuru's face.

Natsuki blinked, wondering why Nabatame said something so random.

Shizuru tilted her head at Nabatame's comment, wondering where Nao was sleeping if Nabatame was in Nao's bed. Her brow furrowed only slightly, and she glanced at Natsuki accusingly. The anger and pain that appeared in those eyes caught Natsuki off-guard, and she swallowed hard as she tried to sink back into the couch.

Nabatame, not noticing Natsuki's discomfort, inwardly chuckled. Gotcha, she thought when she recognized the flare of jealousy in Shizuru's eyes. The woman's mind was already jumping to conclusions. Nabatame hadn't meant to be cruel, she just wanted to see if Shizuru still felt for Natsuki, considering what was said to be going on between the lieutenant and the enemy colonel.

Natsuki, realizing why she was getting such a look from Shizuru, quickly defended herself with, "Nao was sleeping on the floor." Great. She was already lying and she hadn't even had breakfast yet.

Shizuru gave a small, bordering on sneer, smile, as if she didn't see any reason for Natsuki to reassure her of such a thing, though she was inwardly relieved. Then again, did she believe her? The Kyoto born watched Natsuki with those merciless eyes, transfixed by the way her stare made her student increasingly more uncomfortable, trying to find out why it made her so uncomfortable. Natsuki would fidget with the buttons on her uniform top, she'd lean back into the couch and then sit up straight… she'd look everywhere around the room but at Shizuru.

Shizuru sighed deeply, as if she felt guilty for staring so hard at Natsuki. Truthfully, she hadn't realized she had been doing it to begin with. "My," Shizuru purred, forcing Natsuki's emeralds to meet the eyes of her tormentor, "you are so easy to read." Shizuru offered Natsuki a small, weak smile.

And God those words. Like silk, like water, caressing Natsuki with their sweetness and then drowning her in the undertones. Easy to read. Weak? Pathetic? It sounded like an insult.

"How can you tell I'm easy to read if you barely look at me?" Natsuki asked quietly as she slowly stood up from the couch, suddenly wishing she had never invited Nabatame to see such a… what was going on? I'm so sick of this mask. I don't know why she's the one acting so… weird. So sad. Shouldn't I be the one sad? Shouldn't I be the one examining HER mercilessly?

Shizuru's eyes widened, though it was only noticeable to Natsuki, who knew every inch of the woman's face. "Natsuki," she said quietly, "tell me what's… going on. Please." She strode forward and lifted her hand for Natsuki's cheek, paused, and then lowered it again. She fought with herself over touching Natsuki. A part of her wanted to growl and yell and leave… but another part of her knew that Natsuki… Natsuki needed to explain to her.

Natsuki swallowed. Did Shizuru not want to touch her? Now wait a second, maybe Natsuki didn't want to be touched in the first place!

Shizuru lifted her hand and gingerly placed it on Natsuki's cheek. Natsuki was pleased to find the touch was warm, though Shizuru held her palm there awkwardly, as if she weren't sure what to do with her hand. Natsuki moved away from Shizuru's hand, her fists clenching at her sides and her eyes narrowing. Shizuru, eyes widened in surprise, shrunk away from Natsuki, her hand retracting back to her side where it hung limply.

Hurt. Shizuru looked hurt. Natsuki's glare softened and she almost felt guilty. Why was Shizuru making her feel guilty? Shouldn't Shizuru be guilty?

"Kannin na, Natsuki," Shizuru whispered, and Natsuki could hear the truth in those barely audible words. Shizuru was sorry. "But I cannot do this…"

But what was she sorry for? For what she did with Alyssa? What can't she do? Lie to Natsuki? Or was it something else? Natsuki studied Shizuru's face, finding the woman looked just as lost as Natsuki herself felt.

Please love me, Shizuru. Only me. Forever. Please don't let me go, don't leave me. Please. Don't leave me here. Please don't leave me here by myself.

Natsuki's heart froze. Was Shizuru leaving her? Did she mean they were breaking up? Is that what she "couldn't do?" Or was Natsuki about to get a confession?

She had no idea why, but she instantly thought of Alyssa Searrs kissing Shizuru. Alyssa Searrs had undressed Shizuru, taken her, loved her. Natsuki couldn't even say the words out loud, at least not to Shizuru's face. Alyssa was just better. Perfect.

The student sharply inhaled. It felt like her chest was on fire. Her eyes fell quickly to the floor. She didn't know what was going on anymore, she just wanted this to be over with. Why hadn't Shizuru said anything else?

Nabatame was stunned on the couch. I feel like I shouldn't be here. In fact I'm sure I shouldn't be here… and neither should Kuga. Nabatame felt like she was witnessing something that should only be between Shizuru and Natsuki. Thank God for the couch, otherwise she surely would've fallen over with shock.

"We should start your training," Shizuru said, voice lacking much of anything anymore. No pain, no anger, no false anything… just nothing. She gestured for Natsuki to follow her to the center of the room. Wordlessly, Natsuki did. Shizuru noticed how Natsuki did so without protest. So devoted. She'd follow Shizuru blindly anywhere, no matter what.

So then why…? Shizuru wondered, her heart hurting.

Nabatame suddenly felt embarrassed. Clearly her presence was preventing them from working out whatever HUGE issues they had. She didn't know how to excuse herself. Crap, crap, uuh… what do I say to get out of this? But then would she be ditching Natsuki? Who, BY THE WAY, shouldn't just do whatever Shizuru says! Have some dignity Kuga!

Natsuki sent Nabatame a small, devilish smile. Natsuki had her dignity. She was planning on doing something. Nabatame lifted a brow in response, the message in her gaze a silent warning for Natsuki not to do anything too reckless. She wouldn't put it past the girl, especially since Nabatame viewed her as a 'mini-me' and reckless just happened to be Nabatame's middle name.

Shizuru gently pulled Natsuki in front of her and then pulled a red pen from her front pocket. She snapped off the marker's cap with her thumb and then turned to face herself in the mirror. She then carefully drew two large red circles on two areas on her neck. "When I first discovered the potential a move like Kiyohime could have, I wondered how I could teach it to myself without harming someone," Shizuru explained as she placed the cap back onto the marker and slipped it back into her front pocket. She turned around to face Natsuki and she offered the silent girl a small smile. "I practiced on dummies for years until I ever tried it for the first time on myself."

Natsuki's eyes widened. "You could've died!" She accused. And then what would've happened? Natsuki would've never met her teacher, would be dead in a ditch somewhere thanks to Akio. Or worse, still alive with the bastard. She paused. Shizuru had done a lot for her. Maybe all she was asking for was some freedom. Maybe she deserved Alyssa, deserved whatever she wanted. After all, Natsuki was forever in Shizuru's debt. At least, that's how she felt.

Shizuru chuckled darkly at the shocked expression on Natsuki's face. "But I didn't, I managed to get the feeling in my arms back and was able to undo it. It wasn't a perfectly performed Kiyohime, but instead of killing myself it just didn't last as long. You are lucky, you get to practice on me," Shizuru explained as she gestured to the circles she had drawn on her neck. She gently grabbed Natsuki's hands, separated her pointer finger and middle finger from the others, and then placed them against the circle on her neck. "Feel that?"

Natsuki nodded dumbly. "Yes."

"Press when I tell you t—"

"No," Natsuki grumbled as she slipped her hands off Shizuru's neck. "I don't want to. I can hurt you."

Shizuru bathed Natsuki in her crimson gaze, once again examining her, as if questioning those words. After a moment, she frowned slightly. "Even so, am I not asking for it?"

Natsuki shook her head. "Not if you're going to use yourself as a guinea pig," the girl said stubbornly, her arms crossing and her aura that of defiance. Her posture seemed to say 'MAKE me, woman.'

Shizuru, revealing a bit of the Shizuru Natsuki had missed dearly, giggled into the back of her hand. "Oh, is that so?" She asked, her lilting tone teasing. She smiled fondly at Natsuki, who looked absolutely shocked to be on the receiving end of such a look. It had been only fifteen minutes or so and Natsuki had already forgotten what it was like to be looked at in such a way.

Shizuru wondered why Natsuki seemed so in awe of something. She then cleared her throat to snap Natsuki out of it and then turned to look at Nabatame, still sitting on the couch.

The girl looked up, alarmed, as if she were caught watching some kind of sappy soap opera her friends would tease her for enjoying. "Uh, did you want me to leave?" She asked as she pointed to the door.

Shizuru shook her head and instead gestured for Nabatame to join her and Natsuki by the mirror. "Actually I was wondering if you'd like to help us out."

Nabatame suddenly looked excited and she jumped up from the couch in a second. "Are you going to perform the Kiyohime?" She glided forward and then craned her neck to the side in order to give Shizuru a good view. "Perform it on me! Please, it'd be an honor."

Shizuru and Natsuki exchanged looks. It was so natural that they took a moment to regard each other with some surprise. It was nice… the way they naturally exchanged looks at the same time, like people on the same wavelength. It was certainly a nice change from whatever else was going on that was making them feel so disconnected from each other.

Shizuru turned back to Nabatame and smiled while Natsuki was still wondering about their exchanged look. After all, they had exchanged looks so naturally, like they would have if everything were back to normal. Do you love me or not? Natsuki wondered, growing frustrated with all these questions that had no definite answer.

"If you'd really like me to…"

Nabatame did an excited arm pump and then tried to look professional. "Yes, of course I would like you to."

How many people could say they've been Kiyohime'd by Lieutenant Fujino? Nabatame thought of all the bragging rights she'd have after this, not to mention she could finally get that T-shirt made. The one that said, "I Went to Garderobe and Got Myself Kiyohime'd." It could be the souvenir she kept with her to remind her of Garderobe when she graduated.

Shizuru gave one of those impenetrable smiles before placing her hands on Nabatame's shoulders and placing the girl in position. "Natsuki," she called sweetly. The girl took a step forward, ready to take commands from her teacher. Shizuru sighed inwardly before saying, "will you please get behind her and get ready to catch her? Just incase she pitches backwards instead of forwards?"

"Sure," Natsuki grumbled as she walked around Shizuru until she was standing behind Nabatame.

Shizuru, after making sure Nabatame was ready, jabbed her quickly in the throat, her fingers and hands moving like snakes as they struck.

Nabatame ended up falling backwards, and Natsuki caught her right under the arms.

"Shit," Natsuki murmured as she looked up at the lieutenant she both loved and despised, at least at the moment. "She's completely limp."

"Yes," Shizuru said as she smiled apologetically down at the completely motionless third year. "Sometimes, if the victim has a full bladder, they will have no control over it and—"

"Piss themselves?" Natsuki finished as she struggled to hold Nabatame up.

Shizuru winced slightly. She had been about to say 'urinate' but yes, 'piss themselves' worked just as well. She expected no less from her Natsuki. "Yes, it's all rather messy," the Kyoto woman said as she helped Natsuki carry Nabatame over to the couch, where they deposited her.

"She's like jelly," Natsuki commented, wanting to keep Shizuru talking as if nothing were wrong.

She only received a small hum in response. "Mmmm." Shizuru tilted her head at Nabatame. She hadn't been keeping track of time so she really had no clue when the feeling would come back to Nabatame's limbs.

Finally, Nabatame's fingers twitched, and then her legs, and eventually a gasp was heard. "H-Holy hell," Nabatame exclaimed as she managed to sit up with the help of Shizuru. Blue eyes flickered between Shizuru and Natsuki. "That was…"

"Awful?" Shizuru asked, sleek brow lifting.

"Weird?" Natsuki offered.

Nabatame shook her head. "Awesome." She really wanted to hate Shizuru, wanted to dislike her for what the older woman was probably doing to Natsuki. But she couldn't. Shizuru looked just as off as Natsuki did, and Nabatame had to admit… she had no clue what was going on. Either Shizuru was feeling guilty about what she was doing with Alyssa or she was just having an off day. It was like there was a huge elephant in the room and neither of them wanted to say anything about it.

"Too bad Tanaka wasn't here to see it," she said after a moment, thoughts of her own 'Shizuru' coming back to her. The third year wasn't sure what she'd do if she were in Natsuki's position. If she was, Nabatame wouldn't have stuck around. She paused. Or would I have? There was something sickening about absolute devotion. No matter how many times someone hurt you, if you loved them enough, you would look passed it, work through it, and return to them eventually.

It wasn't always the smart thing, to forgive someone and follow them everywhere they went, in fact it was probably the dumb thing to do… yet it couldn't be helped. Love was a completely irrational force, unable to be defeated. No one understood it, least of all Natsuki, who had never expected to fall into it in the first place. It really wasn't her fault.

Who knew love was so goddamned painful? Who knew it turned people into monsters? Then again, Natsuki knew that better than anyone. She had the scars to prove it.

"Crap," Nabatame grumbled as she suddenly missed Tanaka with the kind of longing that had you snuggling in your sheets, not wanting to come out until your love was returned. She stood up from the couch and waited to make sure her legs felt fine enough to hold her weight. She then stood up and sent a confused Natsuki and a smiling Shizuru a small smile. "I'm going to catch up on some sleep, my head still hurts and…" I miss my goddamn girlfriend. She shook off the last of her words and headed for the door.

"B-Bye," Natsuki called after her, torn between begging the third year not to leave her with Shizuru and asking what the rush was.

"Goodbye, Akemi," Shizuru said, her burgundy eyes watching as Nabatame was listening for people out in the hall before deeming it safe to leave. The door shut behind her with a click.

Don't leave me here just with her, I can't take this, they both thought simultaneously.

Awkward silence.

"Would you like to get back to training?" Shizuru asked, giving Natsuki a sidelong glance.

Natsuki gave Shizuru the most pathetic 'I give up, you win' face ever and nodded. "Whatever," she mumbled. She just wanted to leave Shizuru's presence. She had never felt so disconnected before in her entire life. It was like the thread that connected her heart to Shizuru's had been severed. Not by her, not by a third party, but by Shizuru's own hand. God, let me in. Tell me what I did. Tell me why you did what you did. At least confess to me, I need to know. I can't stand not knowing.

In silence they awkwardly practiced Kiyohime. Shizuru had stocked a dummy in the principal's office and had dragged it out for Natsuki to practice on. She had figured Natsuki would refuse to practice on her. Shizuru would shake her head and tell Natsuki to retry, her fingers were hitting the wrong spots, they weren't fast enough, there wasn't enough power. It was all rather imperfect, not good enough for Shizuru.

After about thirty minutes of failure, Shizuru gently gripped Natsuki's hand in her own and led it in the direction it was supposed to fly in. She was hovering behind and to the side of Natsuki, who trembled upon feeling Shizuru's hot breath and sultry voice in her ear as the Kyoto woman whispered, "Just like this…"

You love me, Natsuki growled, not paying attention at all as her fingers were guided once more to the red circles on the dummy's neck. Natsuki suddenly turned, grabbed Shizuru's wrist and pinned her love up against the mirror they had been practicing in front of. Natsuki pinned both of Shizuru's hands by the wrist on either side of the brunette's head.

Red eyes widened only a fraction. Shizuru had been caught off-guard. "N-Natsuki," she breathed, alarmed by the blazing look in the girl's eyes. Where had all that ferocity come from?

Natsuki smirked, glad Shizuru had said her name in such a way. A part of Natsuki wanted to make Shizuru pay, pay for being so goddamned… unaware of the torture she inflicted on Natsuki. Another part of her wanted to force Shizuru to love her. "Shizuru, do you love me?" She asked quietly, her grip on Shizuru's wrists loosening only slightly.

"Yes," the word was hushed, quiet, not as confident as Natsuki would have liked.

"Don't lie to me," Natsuki growled fiercely, her eyes burning into Shizuru's. She then looked broken, in pain, hurting. "Please," she added, more quietly this time. "Y-You don't have to lie to me. Not me, Shizuru, because you—you love me…" Natsuki trailed off, realizing Shizuru was staring at her with so many emotions that there was no hope of identifying any of them.

"I am not lying," Shizuru said softly, though her face was like stone. She didn't ask why Natsuki was so adamant about knowing the answer to this question. That's because she didn't want to hear the answer, have to explain. "You know I love you," she whispered, her tone full of love as she tried to will Natsuki to believe her with her eyes. "You know. You have to know how I feel about you," Shizuru begged. She struggled slightly against Natsuki, who was apparently much stronger than previously thought. The grip tightened slightly around her wrists, and Shizuru stopped trying to get away.

Natsuki stared at Shizuru long and hard, the question of 'then why…?' shone in them. The blank stare she got in return hurt her deeply, cut her to her very core. "You're so cruel," she murmured, her fingers uncurling from Shizuru's wrists and her arms looping around Shizuru's neck, which she then nuzzled into. "I don't know what you're doing." Or why. The words were whispered against the base of Shizuru's throat, Natsuki's hot breath causing shivers to run up and down Shizuru's spine. "Why are you doing this to me?"

Shizuru went rigid in Natsuki's hold and she said nothing.

Seconds ticked by. Shizuru wrapped her arms around Natsuki's waist slowly, as if her arms were attached to strings and someone above was forcing her to place them around her student. "Natsuki…" she finally whispered. Natsuki kissed Shizuru's throat lovingly. Shizuru felt tears sting her eyes but she held them back. "Kannin na… you are my most precious person…" Forgive me, Natsuki.

Natsuki chuckled darkly, the sound reverberating through Natsuki's chest to Shizuru's. "If that's true then what are you asking me to forgive you for?" Natsuki asked as she planted her lips to the side of Shizuru's slender neck, loving the spicy scent that lingered on this woman's flesh. She had no idea why she was doing this. Maybe it was to make Shizuru uncomfortable, maybe it was because deep down she knew that at some point Shizuru would come clean and tell her she no longer wanted to see her, which would mean no more intimacy. Unfortunately, Natsuki rather craved it. She just wanted one last taste if Shizuru was really going to break her, land the final blow, tell her she just wanted to be friends or something else equally horrifying. Just teacher and student.

Natsuki had had enough of this 'precious person' business. If she was so precious, the most precious, then why was Shizuru hiding things from her? Sneaking around with Alyssa? It all made no sense to Natsuki, who was torn between believing what could very likely be beautiful lies and calling them out for what they were.

Shizuru shivered at Natsuki's intensity, her student's breath on her neck. "Na—" The two girls nearly jumped when a loud thud was heard in the smaller, ancient principal's office. Someone had come in through the window entrance. Natsuki instantly backed away from Shizuru, who never took her sorrowful eyes off of her student.

The door to the principal's office opened and Alyssa stepped out. She was wearing her Garderobe uniform, military cap on her head and rifle slung behind her back. She paused in the doorway upon seeing Natsuki and Shizuru in front of her.

"Did I interrupt something?" The blonde colonel asked, both her brows lifting as her sapphires flickered between Natsuki and Shizuru. Shizuru looked positively empty, absolutely guilty. Natsuki looked hurt, confused... and hella pissed. Damn, Alyssa thought, her eyes widening at the scene in front of her. Did Shizuru tell Kuga? It's about time, Alyssa thought.

What a goddamn surprise. Natsuki suddenly wondered what the hell had been up with the 'I just want Shizuru to be happy' thoughts. Right now she wanted to kick Alyssa's face in until it was deformed and then maybe ask if Shizuru still found the blonde attractive.

Natsuki was slightly surprised by her violent thoughts, though a ghost of a smile graced her features as she thought about it over and over. Hah. That'd teach them.

"Shizuru was just helping me train a bit…" Natsuki said after a moment, her eyes looking Alyssa up and down, searching for a weak spot to exploit. She wasn't leaving here, wasn't going out without one big mother-fuckin' BANG.

Alyssa eyed the intensity of Natsuki's face, the severe loathing in her eyes, the beast lurking just beneath the surface, ready to unleash it's wrath upon the world. She had seen this exact look before. She had seen it in Jin Higa. Alyssa hadn't seen herself in Natsuki. It had been Jin she had seen. Raw talent, strong-will, iron determination, hurtful world, deep, dark past involving a father figure. Natsuki's background didn't match that of Colonel Searrs, it matched that of Jin's.

Many hate me. Few have the balls to confront me, Alyssa thought as she regarded Natsuki with curiosity. Will you confront me, Natsuki Kuga?

Shizuru, regaining her composure, put on her mask and stepped away from the mirror Natsuki had momentarily been holding her up against. She put her hand on Natsuki's shoulder and said, "I believe Natsuki was just leaving, actually. She has to get ready for class."

Natsuki's head snapped to the side, absolute shock at the fact that the Kyoto-woman was dismissing her just because Alyssa appeared. Shizuru turned her head to the side and gave Natsuki a pleading look. 'Don't make a scene.'

Alyssa stepped forward with a relieved smile on her face. "Oh, well then let's go," she said as she wrapped her hand around Shizuru's upper arm, as if she meant to lead her somewhere.

Natsuki took a step closer, her fists at her sides. "Where are you taking her? She's training me."

Alyssa glanced at Natsuki and then gave her a polite smile. "I was going to take Shizuru out for a bit, get her some air before her class… if you don't mind, of course."

"I mind," Natsuki growled.

"Natsuki…" Shizuru said quietly as she shook her head. "Don't be difficult," Shizuru pleaded. "We can talk about this late—"

"I'm being… difficult?" This just didn't make sense. No goddamn sense at all. Surely Shizuru saw the way she was acting. Surely Shizuru must know that Natsuki knew she had been unfaithful, so why was she pretending that they hadn't just had that conversation? Shizuru wouldn't do this unless she meant to push Natsuki away… meant to push her away so that Alyssa could take her place.

Rage filled Natsuki's being, the kind of rage she hadn't felt in a long while. It was the feeling she felt when her mother died, when Akio had betrayed her, when Shizuru had almost been shot by the asshole, whenever Tomoe liked to pretend Shizuru was her girlfriend, when Jin showed Natsuki those pictures of Shizuru kissing Tomoe, when Natsuki had found out that Shizuru never told her about dating Alyssa… when Natsuki found out she still was dating Alyssa.

She still had to figure out the last one, but she was nearly certain by this point. What else would explain Shizuru's inability to look at Natsuki, talk to her like she used to? The only answer was that Shizuru felt bad about what she was doing, but not enough to stop. She loved Alyssa more. Didn't she?

And suddenly, Natsuki knew how to confirm it.

Alyssa wasn't expecting the first year to approach her, but she also wasn't expecting the young student to slam her fist into her face. Alyssa staggered backwards, completely caught off-guard by the blow. A small gasp of alarm came from behind Natsuki, Shizuru probably. Ooh sorry, did I hurt your new precious person?

Natsuki lunged forward and tackled the stunned colonel before anyone could say anything. They crashed to the ground.

"Alyssa!" Shizuru cried out in panic. Point for Alyssa, she got the concerned call, despite being stronger than Natsuki.

Natsuki grabbed the colonel by the collar and slammed her backwards onto the floor. Why the hell wasn't Alyssa fighting back? Sapphires stared up at Natsuki, eyes narrowed, but fists at her sides. She wasn't going to fight Natsuki, she felt bad for the girl.

"Fight me!" Natsuki growled as she slammed her fist once more into Alyssa's cheek. The colonel let out a growl, Kuga sure knew how to punch. She then realized that was partly her doing, and she smiled despite her current predicament.

Natsuki saw it as being mocked. "I'll kill you," Natsuki snarled, right as she lifted her fist into the air once more. Shizuru caught it.

"Natsuki!" She hissed angrily. "Stop this at once!" Point again to Alyssa. Shizuru was on her side, not Natsuki's.

"No," Natsuki growled as she struggled to get her fist free from Shizuru. Shizuru suddenly gripped the back of Natsuki's collar and tugged her backwards off of Alyssa. Natsuki choked as she was pulled roughly backwards, like a dog that fought against the rope wrapped tightly to its neck.

Shizuru then struggled to subdue Natsuki. She didn't want to use force against Natsuki, didn't want to accidently hurt her. Sure they had sparred many times in training sessions but this was different, this was Natsuki intentionally lashing out at someone. Finally she had pinned Natsuki to the ground with her weight. Her hands pinned Natsuki's wrists above her head and her body pinned Natsuki's to the ground.

Natsuki glared upwards into crimson as she slowly stopped struggling.

Alyssa slowly stood up and then rubbed at her jaw. "That was… rather impressive," she said after a moment.

"Alyssa," Shizuru warned quietly, her eyes piercing into Natsuki's, "do not encourage it."

The blonde colonel chuckled and walked over to where Shizuru had Natsuki pinned to the ground. She leaned over the girl and stared down at her, sapphires twinkling. "You okay, Kuga?" Alyssa asked curiously.

Natsuki tore her glare away from Shizuru, who had stood up for and protected Alyssa, and settled it on the enemy colonel instead. "Go to Hell," Natsuki growled.

Alyssa shrugged. "Already there," she muttered as she sauntered over to the couch and plopped down on it. She pulled out her gun and carelessly aimed it at Natsuki. She closed one eye, as if she were taking aim at the rabid girl. "Bang," she mumbled.

Natsuki snarled and struggled once more under Shizuru. She wanted nothing more than to rip Alyssa Searrs apart. Hell, she was okay with the death that would surely entail. It would be worth it!

Shizuru glanced at Alyssa, an incredibly displeased expression on her face. "Alyssa, please leave us," she said sternly, not wanting to have to physically restrain Natsuki any longer but afraid of what the girl would do if she released her.

Alyssa nodded, stood up, and walked towards the door that led to the smaller room. The door shut with a click behind her. A few seconds passed as they waited for Alyssa to climb out the window. When she figured Alyssa was gone, Shizuru let out a sigh.

Shizuru returned her red gaze to Natsuki, who looked like she was on the verge of tears. Shizuru's heart panged with guilt at the sight. "Natsuki… promise me you will not—"

"I promise."

Shizuru nodded and moved to get off Natsuki. She ended up beside the girl, both of them staying on the floor. "Please explain to me what that was," Shizuru requested quietly.

Natsuki stared up at the ceiling. "I hate you," she declared quietly.

Shizuru's heart stopped and her eyes widened. "Na—"

Those emeralds turned ever so slightly to stare at her. "Of course you turn me into the bad guy. I'm not the one going behind the other's back and fooling around with other girls," Natsuki snapped as she sat up and watched Shizuru's horrified expression. Hope sparked in Natsuki's chest. The complete and utter terrified and confused look on Shizuru's face could only mean the accusation was too unbelievable to Shizuru.

Shizuru regained her composure though a sinister look suddenly swirled within her eyes. Shizuru looked angry. "So you are to tell me you weren't seen with Nao in the woods?" Shizuru questioned ever so sweetly. "Rolling around on the ground, clothing scattered about?"

Natsuki's eyes widened and she rushed to defend herself, "We were drunk and we both stopped five seconds into it!" She flailed her hands as she explained, not wanting the table to be turned on her so easily. How had Shizuru known about that, anyways?

Shizuru lifted a brow. "Ara…" she breathed, her heart hurting with the new knowledge that Natsuki and Nao had gotten intimate. She suddenly didn't feel so bad about Natsuki's accusations. The girl had confirmed it. Shizuru hoped Natsuki would deny it, relieve her hurting heart. But she had gone behind Shizuru's back to do things with Nao. Shizuru hadn't wanted to believe the rumors circling that morning, but now she had to.

"Besides," Natsuki growled, annoyed that Shizuru was playing the victim, "that was early this morning! Who knows how long you've been sneaking around with Alyssa!"

Shizuru's lips twitched at the new, more specific accusation. Alyssa. Shizuru had a feeling that may have been what it was, given what just happened a few moments ago... though she had no idea how Natsuki knew about that. "That was a mistake," she said quietly, her tone one of someone trying to soothe. "A very bad mistake." The anger was replaced by deep guilt, regret. How had Natsuki even seen that anyways? How long had Natsuki known? Had she been angry about it all this time? Was that why Natsuki did what she did? If Shizuru had known she would've never kept--

That confirmed it. Shizuru had… been with Alyssa. It didn't matter that she appeared to regret it. It didn't matter at all. Natsuki shot up off the ground and stormed towards the door, her body shaking and her chest constricting and making it hard for her to breathe.

Shizuru bolted after her. "Wait, Natsuki!"

Natsuki turned and slammed her palm straight across Shizuru's face. It was so hard that tears sprung from Shizuru's eyes instantly and the Kyoto-woman stood stock still, her head slowly returning to face Natsuki's. Natsuki instantly regretted hurting Shizuru, her anger faltering briefly as the urge to apologize profusely very nearly took her over. The look in Shizuru's eyes was cold, angry, like steel. Absolutely and completely loveless.

"I-I'm leaving," Natsuki announced as she spun on her heel once more and stalked briskly towards the door. She had to leave, had to run. This was suffocating her, drowning her. Shizuru stood still, following Natsuki's retreating form with her hurt crimson.

"Fine," Shizuru whispered harshly, her tone cold and almost relieved. The unspoken, 'it's about time' ringed in Natsuki's ears as she reached for the doorknob, not bothering to check if people were out in the hallway or not. She suddenly stopped, turned, and glared at Shizuru.

The Kyoto-woman straightened and watched Natsuki with rage-filled eyes. Her stinging cheek was already starting to turn light red. Her fingers trembled at her sides, Natsuki had never seen Shizuru look so… torn, unsure, hurt. It was a mix of the way she looked when she had Akio's throat beneath her boot and before she and Natsuki were together, a sad, longing look.

"Who do you love, Natsuki?" Shizuru asked quietly, her voice strained due to her trying to prevent shakiness. "Because it certainly isn't me."

Natsuki's mouth dropped at the accusation. That was bullshit! Absolute bullshit! Natsuki loved Shizuru! Who else would she love? Nao? Not like that… never like that! Just because she couldn't say it? Because she never told Shizuru… is that why Shizuru did what she did?

"I love no one," Natsuki growled her answer, her lie. Her hand then lifted to her head, where her fingers found the lightning bolt barrette. It was worn every day since receiving it. She cherished it. The student held it in her hand, emerald eyes tracing its outline. Eventually, those eyes lifted to meet with Shizuru's once more. "Here, give this to Alyssa," Natsuki spat. With that, Natsuki threw the silver barrette towards Shizuru, who flinched as it just barely missed her face.

Teacher and student stared each other down… before student turned and exited the room, slamming the door shut behind her. Goodbye Lieutenant… goodbye… Shizuru.

Natsuki stormed down the hallway of the Academics building. It was later now, so there were a few students in the hallway. She didn't care if they saw her walk out of the janitor's closet, didn't care if they asked questions about it and discovered it. Fuck her 'secret room.' Shizuru and Alyssa can have it.

Precious person my ass, Natsuki growled as she shoved some random student to the ground and burst through the double doors of the Academics building. She bounded down the steps and continued stalking across campus to her tent.

Precious person means nothing. It means nothing if you have more than one. And my god I'm stupid. I've been so stupid not to see it before… NO… no… I'm stupid to have pretended I didn't see it. To pretend I was alright when I wasn't, to allow this to continue all around me. Natsuki's heart hurt with every beat, her hand lifted to clutch at her uniform right above it.

Love makes people do stupid things. Like attacking Alyssa Searrs. That had been a stupid thing. Love makes people panic, love makes people do things they normally wouldn't because of their precious person, they'd do anything for their goddamn precious person. I would too. I would do anything.

Anything because of this curse called "love."

Because she's my precious person.

I want nothing to do with love for the rest of my life, Natsuki silently declared.

Great now if she won the competition she'd be stuck with her the entire goddamn time. But Natsuki still wanted to compete… she still wanted to learn Kiyohime and defeat Tomoe. Damn it, Natsuki growled. She couldn't win the competition without winning the prize too, a prize she no longer wanted. At least she didn't think she wanted it, not anymore.

And the worst part of this entire ordeal was that Natsuki, despite feeling an intense anger towards her emotional tormentor, felt like the only way to feel better was to snuggle with this same exact person. God, all she wanted was for Shizuru to tell her she loved her, to hold her in her arms and tell her she never meant to hurt Natsuki.

Whoever said ignorance was bliss was such an asshole. I hate know-it-alls.

She couldn't wait to collapse in her own bed, be consumed by hopefully non-interrupted sleep, be alone in her own world, get lost in the soothing, blissful embrace of silence.

With some terror, Natsuki realized that she had class in a few minutes. Right after training she was supposed to go to class with Shizuru... Shit. How could she go there now? Shizuru would be there, sitting at her desk, and Natsuki would have to pretend that nothing just happened…

Ah, shit, Natsuki mentally groaned. Then again…

Maybe she could have some fun during class… return to her rebellious student days of glory? That might be fun. Then again, did she really want to bring Shizuru any more irritation?

Natsuki entered her tent and saw Nao, who looked up from her magazine and quirked a brow at her.

"Get ready for class," Natsuki said, a diabolical smile on her lips.

Nao blinked. "I'm not going to like this, am I?"

---

If your thoughts are along the lines of: OMGWTFBBQ WHAT IS GOING ON? THIS MAKES NO SENSE. I HATE YOU SHAYP.

Well. Good. That's what I was going for. You know how when I write a chapter where something big happens and then I ask you all to have faith in me? Well, I'm doing it again. Have faith in me. Have I let you down before? The confused/WTF feelings you are experiencing are completely natural and expected, which means I know exactly what I'm doing. I'm not saying don't panic, in fact, please do. All I'm saying is that what doesn't make sense now, will make sense/be explained later.

Also, I promise we won't fall into pits of deep dark angst to the point where you're like "Dude just kill yourself." In fact, I know this is going to sound weird, but I think the next few chapters are kind of fun. Or at least the next one is. Then again, I'm kind of weird. Maybe I should've named this chapter "The fuck?" Or "WUT."

Go get some fresh air, walk around a bit, get laid, any type of stress-reliever and you should be fine until 27, which I plan on writing as fast as humanly possible.

Thank you, once again, to my beta, Andrea :)

Also, thank you to you anonymous reviewers. I do believe a librarian intern comes to mind among others... I am glad 'Monster' is keeping you entertained!

Chapter Song:

All You Want by Dido

I'd like to watch you sleep at night

to hear you breathe by my side

And though sleep leaves me behind

there's nowhere I'd rather be

And now our bed is oh so cold

my hands feel empty

no one to hold

I can sleep what side I want

It's not the same with you gone

Oh if you'd come home

I'll let you know that

All you want

Is right here in this room

All you need

Is sitting here with you

All you want

It's been three years

One night apart

but in that night you tore my heart

If only you had slept alone

If those seeds had not been sown

Oh you could come home and you would know that

All you want

Is right here in this room

All you need

Is sitting here with you

All you want

I hear your key turning in the door

I won't be hearing that sound anymore

And you and your sin

can leave the way you just came in

send my regards to her

I hope you've found that

All you want

Is right there in that room

All you need

Is sitting there with you

All you want

I'd like to watch you sleep at night

to hear you breathe by my side

-ShayP -Is shot-

P.S

Profile's been updated. SoS is on its way, yadda yadda.

-is shot again-