"I vote brilliant," Scorpius said. "If you're referring to the Prophet article, not my mental state hosting this party."

Potter chuckled. "Maybe I'm the one cracking up for thinking that's funny." His expression became serious. "The Weasleys can be overwhelming, but I'm here to discuss the article."

"Good deeds are good business," Scorpius said.

"I understand the PR angle. Why was Rose involved?"

He had to ask? "Because she's my partner." Potter's don't-be-thick look triggered defensiveness. "I didn't know that picture was taken, all right? I allowed Crispin to send the photographs without inspecting them first. It was an oversight that won't happen again."

"How will that photo affect your access to the Walpurgis Club?"

"It won't. Grandfather was exceedingly amused."

Potter shook his head. "Ron's reaction was the exact opposite."

The thought of which had no doubt added to Lucius Malfoy's amusement. Scorpius said, "I'm doing what I can to show that I'm Slytherin to the core despite my . . . independent ways."

"And are you?"

"Slytherin to the core?" Scorpius smiled thinly. "Does it matter as long as you get the information you want?"

"I suppose not." Potter's answering smile was wry. "Although it might reassure Rose's father if you said you weren't."

Scorpius doubted that very much. He said, "The corner market has pumpkin seeds if you don't have time to go to McGregor's."

Potter checked his watch. "Thanks. If I'm not home soon Ginny will track me down." He'd barely finished speaking when a silvery horse Patronus charged through the wall. It tossed its head, front hooves pawing at the air.

Scorpius said, "The corner market is Muggle. I suggest buying Nutella."

.

Rose giggled when she heard his advice. "I wonder if he did it."

"Don't expect me to find out," Scorpius replied. They were standing in the walk in wardrobe. He'd asked Rose to choose a fresh shirt for him. He took off his t-shirt. "I intend to avoid your Uncle Harry as much as possible."

"Because of your father?"

It felt like more than his torso was laid bare. "Yes."

Rose hugged him.

He said, "I think you need a fresh shirt too."

Her eyes laughed. "I'm wearing a dress that only looks like a separate shirt and skirt."

"I know." He tugged the hem. She lifted her arms so he could pull the dress up and off. Skin on skin made the next hug even better. Scorpius was about to suggest that she change into a sundress that didn't require a brassiere when he heard the sound of a throat clearing. Stevens's voice came through the wardrobe doors. "Your guests are arriving, Master Scorpius."

"Thank you. We'll be right out." He didn't move.

Rose's arms tightened around him. "You can do this," she said. "I'll be with you."

That's what the party was for, to show her family that Rose was with him, and they were good together. He smiled and asked if she'd like their outfits to coordinate. She picked out the blue-grey sundress with black embroidery that Hugo had called "skimpy" when she'd worn it on their first visit to the Burrow. "My favourite," Scorpius said.

She reached for a blue-grey silk dress shirt. "I think we should be the perfect match."

.

Their parents stood in the foyer chatting about Antares. Both couples were dressed in semi-formal attire, suits and ties for the men, cocktail dresses for the women. Scorpius glanced down at his dark jeans. Should he change into black trousers?

Ron Weasley had a worried look on his face. He said, "Buying an owl together, Rosie? That's a big commitment."

Rose kissed her father's cheek. "Come see him. He'll remind you of Pig."

A bell chimed. Stevens opened the door to Rose's grandparents. Arthur Weasley held out his hand, "Hello, I'm Arthur, also known as Granddad Weasley, pleased to meet you. Are you Granddad Greengrass?"

"No, Mr. Weasley. I'm Stevens. A pleasure to make your acquaintance."

Rose rushed over. "Granny! Granddad!" She kissed their cheeks and said, "You have perfect timing. We were just going out on the terrace to look at our new owl."

Arthur asked, "What species?"

Molly Weasley frowned when Stevens said, "If I may, madam," and held out his hands to take the dish of bread and butter pudding she carried.

"I know you from somewhere. What's your full name?" she demanded.

"Quentin Stevens, madam."

Molly laughed girlishly. "Cheeky little madam is what you called me at school. Didn't like me acting the third wheel on Hogsmeade Weekends, did you?" She turned to Arthur. "Don't you recognise him? It's Q without the long hair."

Arthur beamed. "Of Q and A fame!"

"Is Amelia with you?" Molly asked.

Stevens said, "Mrs. Stevens is in the kitchen."

"Point the way," Molly said. "My old friend and I have some catching up to do."

Arthur chuckled as wife bustled off. "Q and A. My word. The stories I could tell."

"As could I," Stevens murmured.

Ron told his father, "What are you going on about? This is the first time I've heard about any stories."

"Ahem, yes, well, that's because I've forgotten them." Arthur turned to Rose. "Let's go see that owl."

Scorpius was happy to let Rose lead the others to the terrace. He and Stevens remained in the foyer to welcome the next guests. Scorpius tried to imagine the unflappable major-domo as a seventh-year with long hair who called Molly Weasley a cheeky little madam. He said, "Third wheel?"

Stevens's gaze flickered toward the kitchen when a burst of laughter rang out. "And a squeaky one."

The door chimed twice. Albus, Merry, Roxanne, Fred, Louis, Dominique, James, Victoire and Lupin filed in. They were all dressed in attire that suggested they were going clubbing later. Dominique kept scratching her arm. She must not have taken a cold shower.

"I feel like one of those dwarves in The Hobbit," Albus said.

"But more welcome," Scorpius replied.

"Does that apply to all of us?" Lupin asked.

"Of course . . . Ted." The startled look on Lupin's face was worth the effort to say his name without curling a lip. "Stevens will show you to the terrace. There's a table for the food," he added when Merry held up her trifle.

"You have a butler. I can't wait to tell Lily," Dominique said as she followed the others. She scratched the back of her hand.

Scorpius refrained from advising that she not send Lily another gloating letter. She deserved whatever she got.

Rose's aunts and uncles arrived in pairs: Fleur and Bill, George and Angelina, Percy and Audrey, Luna and Rolf, and finally Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny. They all wore dress robes except for Angelina, who wore a long caftan in a bold geometric print. Scorpius welcomed them and asked Stevens to slide the glass panels into the wall pockets to open the lounge to the terrace. When Granny and Granddad Granger arrived, Scorpius joined Rose and the others watching his mother and father make pizza.

"Anything I can do?" he asked.

His father wiped a speck of flour off his green and white striped apron. He had removed his jacket and tie. "A lager would be splendid."

George Weasley, who was holding hands with his wife, lifted his free hand to his mouth and shouted, "Oi, Fred, toss Draco a bottle of lager!"

At the drinks station near the French doors leading to the master bedroom, Fred hollered back, "Which kind?"

"One in a green bottle!"

Fred laughed and used a spell to send the lager zooming over.

Roxanne yelled, "Wanker! You almost hit me in the head!"

Angelina Weasley said dryly, "We're such a quiet, reserved family."

"But you love us anyway," George said in a tone that was more question than joke.

"Yes, I do," Angelina replied softly.

George pulled her toward the lounge. "Tour," he said. "Women always want to tour other people's houses. Let's go."

"By all means," Scorpius said.

Rose grabbed his hand and squeezed it with her joyful python grip.

"Tour?" Merry said. "I want to take a tour!"

"Better if they're self-guided," George said. "Albus, mate, start yours that way." He pointed to the French doors at the end of the terrace and dragged Angelina into the lounge.

As the younger crowd snickered and older couples grinned, Luna Scamander sighed. "Love without measure is man's greatest pleasure."

Scorpius's mother said, "From Night of the Nargles."

"You've read my book?" Luna asked breathlessly. "It's always lovely to meet a fan, especially one who makes throwing pizza dough look like modern dance. I'm Luna."

"Astoria." The women shook hands.

Scorpius's father cast Cleaning Charms. "Can't have L.L. Scamander's prose getting floury."

Luna turned to her brawny husband. "Draco Malfoy made a pun."

Rolf said, "It was very punny."

Luna smiled dreamily. "I'm so glad we didn't decline the invitation like I'd planned."

The day turned surreal. Everyone mingled and chatted and then piled their plates and sat at the table that stretched from one end of the terrace to the other. Scorpius's parents and the Scamanders sat at one end, discussing the couple's Believer series. At the other, Stevens and Mrs. Stevens—Q and A to Molly and Arthur—chatted about old times. At least the women and Arthur chatted. Stevens nodded from time to time. He glanced toward Scorpius, and his commiserating look brought up a memory.

.

He hated Grandmother Narcissa's tea parties. Not because the pure-blooded ladies she invited pretended to coo and fuss over him while staring with their cold fish eyes. Not because she piled his plate with so many sweets that he ended up with a stomach ache. Not even because she made him wear green velvet dress robes. Scorpius hated Grandmother Narcissa's tea parties because she made him sing.

When he turned six, Scorpius declared that he was too old to sing for old ladies. The women gasped. Grandmother Narcissa clutched a hand to her heart. "Old ladies?"

Scorpius ran out of the drawing room.

Stevens found him sitting on the front steps. The major-domo sat beside him. "That was ill-mannered of you, Master Scorpius."

"I know." He pressed his lips together. "Do you think less of me?"

"Of course not." Stevens gave him a sympathetic look. "But sometimes we have to do things for the ones we love, not because they're pleasant, or because there's nothing else we'd rather do, but because it makes them happy and it shows we love them."

"What are you humming?" Rose asked.

Scorpius watched Stevens cough to hide a smile and said, "Just a song." He turned toward her and for an instant his gaze met Harry Potter's. Like Stevens, Uncle Harry was a Legilimens. Green eyes widened. He had seen the end of the memory: Stevens playing the piano and singing with Scorpius:

For he himself has said it,

And it's greatly to his credit,

That he is a Slytherin!

.

Fairy lights brightened as the sun set. Merry had the idea of removing the table and chairs and dancing on the terrace instead of at a club. Fred played DJ and spun the Orpheus Orbs. Scorpius allowed Rose's father to cut in on I Believe in Nargles and went to check on Felix. The Niffler was asleep in his hammock. A faint tapping sound drew him over to the wardrobe. He opened the double doors.

Lupin had shoved clothing to one side. "Aparecium!"

Scorpius asked, "Have you completely lost your mind?"

Lupin froze, and then he exhaled heavily. "The other three loos were occupied, and when I walked by here, I thought, 'What if the Green Knight costume's hidden in a compartment sealed with Anti-Summoning Charms?' Using a Revealing Charm seemed like a brilliant thing to do at the time."

"Instead of an illegal search guaranteed to render any evidence inadmissible in court." Scorpius flicked his wand to restore the closet to perfect order.

"Yeah," Lupin said wryly. "I suppose you can't wait to tell Harry."

"That depends."

Lupin said, "I promise not to cast any more spells in your home."

"Thank you."

"I still think you were the one playing dress up. I can't prove it, but I know it in my gut."

Not because Scorpius had the most extensive Creevey Wizard Comic collection in the wizarding world and the Galleons to commission an exorbitantly expensive costume? All that was incidental compared to Lupin's gut? "Explain."

"It's a vibe I get when I'm talking to suspects. They know I'm onto them and they're trying to hide it through stonewalling or antagonism."

Scorpius shook his head. "My antagonism, as you call it, is based on something else entirely."

Lupin's eyes turned black. "Because my father was a werewolf?"

"Because of Rose."

"Yeah, right."

Scorpius smiled thinly.

"You're serious."

"Is your gut telling you that?"

Lupin made a face. "Yeah, and that's messed up. I'd never—"

"Tell Rose that I'm not her type when you'd barely met me? Why did you say that?"

"I don't remember."

The uneasiness in the other man's voice and the eye colour change to brown provoked Scorpius to strike. "I suppose you don't remember kissing her last New Year's Eve, either, although if I kissed a girl so badly that it killed her crush I'd probably want to forget it too."

"Rosie didn't have a crush."

Lupin's protest lacked conviction. Scorpius said, "Did it make you feel less like a dog in the manger, telling yourself that you were being protective instead of jealous that you weren't the centre of attention anymore?"

"Dog in the—what does that even mean?"

"Aesop's Fables? Dog in the manger bites the ox reaching for hay? It means you don't want something, but you don't want anyone else to have it."

"I want someone else to have it! I'm not a dog!"

"Then stop biting me because I can't live without hay."

Lupin dragged a hand through his hair. "Now I'm messed up. That made sense."

Stevens's voice was heard. "Yes, miss, may I help you?"

"Sonorous Charm," Scorpius said. "He's warning us that your fiancée is looking for you."

He took a clothes hanger off the wood bar and said, "Italian. Guaranteed to keep your dress robes wrinkle free. Take it with you. I insist."

"Teddy?" Victoire's tone was one of laughing disbelief.

Scorpius said, "Ted asked for wardrobe organisation tips. I take it he's the unorganised one in the relationship?"

"He's a hot mess," Victoire said. "Hot, hot, hot." She had a tipsy enough to start saying embarrassing things smile on her face. Her skin glowed faintly.

Lupin snatched the clothes hanger out of Scorpius's hand. "Thank you, darling. Scorpius, nice party."

"De-lightful," Victoire said.

Stevens allowed the couple to show themselves out. He shut the wardrobe doors and said quietly, "There are worse things to compare oneself to than an ox."

"How reassuring." Scorpius caught the twinkle in Stevens's eye and asked, "Something else you'd like to say?"

"I wouldn't presume."

"Go ahead."

Stevens said, "I advise you to make hay while the sun shines."

.

.

A/N: The party's not over yet! After taking so long to arrive, it wouldn't be fair not to linger. ;) I had the funniest mental images pop into my head this chapter. There's a scene in Addams Family Values where Wednesday is forcing herself to smile and her lips do this wobbly thing and I could imagine Scorpius's doing that as he forced himself to say "Ted" without curling his lip. I think the chat in the wardrobe cleared the air between the two: at least until Scorpius makes Teddy suspicious again. The song He is a Slytherin was taken from the Gilbert and Sullivan song He is an Englishman from the operetta H.M.S. Pinafore (If anyone's ever seen Chariots of Fire, the Slytherin-like runner Abrahams sings it, and Gilbert, who wrote the libretto to the operetta, was also a very snarky Slytherin type).

Special thanks to the brave souls who read my just-posted poem Vincent which is an homage to the Tim Burton poem (and short animated film you can watch on YouTube). This chapter gave me an idea to write a Molly and Arthur one shot about him giving her a reason not to be a third wheel to her friend anymore. I promise to put off going on one shot tangents until writing the rest of the party. :)

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I hope FF gets its glitches worked out so when I hit on the reply link the "can't find the review" message stops popping up, but if it's still messed up I'll just reply by PM. :) Thanks alix33, Arcoiris (forgot to send PM about pov choice question! Will do soon), ctc, drcjsnider, fynnsmom, glassycry, I'm A Fan (I heart you so much for your kind words!) Nagini Fay, Needle In A Haystack, Rose of the West, The Chirpy Bitch, trinityblue76, VandyFNP and yiota146!