The Legend of Zelda: Paradise Calling
Author's Notes:
General reminder that I post extended notes in my profile.
Let's face it: Unless Epona had bionic legs, the horse jump in the game was ridiculous. It was awesome, but ridiculous. Her legs should have snapped like matchsticks.
Chapter 24: Schemes Within Schemes
It was finished. Link had done it.
It had been far too close for comfort, but Epona surged ahead at the last instant, winning the race by half a length. A rage-filled scream pursued Link across the finish line as Epona closed the second lap, indisputably ahead.
The tension in Malon's chest fled as she expelled the breath she had been holding. Her knees quivered, and she knelt to the grass as Epona cantered past, her hands cupping against her racing heart. Her eyes fell shut and she tried to steady her breathing as she sent a silent prayer of thanks to Nayru.
We did it, she thought, almost not daring to believe it. We beat him. We actually did it!
Link drew Epona around, giving time for the mare to cool down. She chuffed as she drew in deep, rumbling gulps of air. "Easy girl, easy," he cooed, running a soothing hand along her neck. "Good job. You did great."
Ingo had dismounted Sanctil and was quite literally hopping mad, stomping the ground in a fit of blind rage and shouted curses. The grey geldling shied away as its rider kicked up a spray of dirt from the track and continued hurling insults at luck, the Goddesses, and whomever else he could think to blame. Link climbed down from his saddle and stalked towards the raging rancher, his fists clenching at his sides.
"Link?" Malon called in warning, seeing the angry set of his jaw. "Link?" She climbed to her feet and quickly crossed the distance, only a step behind as Link spun Ingo around and grabbed him by the overalls. With a surge of adrenaline he twisted and pinned the rancher to the corral fence.
"What the hell was that?" Link yelled, his face inches from Ingo's.
"You're a sloppy rider," Ingo replied with a sneer. The rage burning in Link's core flared, and he hammered the rancher back against the iron bars, lifting him so that his toes barely kept contact with the ground. Ingo gurgled as his collar cut into his throat, but he kept his gaze defiantly locked with Link's.
"Malon made it clear; We agreed that there would be no contact between riders," Link said through gritted teeth.
"I didn't touch your precious Epona. Blame my stupid mount," Ingo spat, then his eyes narrowed. "You wanna talk about cheating, eh? Want to tell me how you managed to tame that wild horse under my nose? I don't recall hiring you to break in our stock."
His gaze turned to Malon. "Or maybe it was you? You set me up for this. You knew he could ride Epona." His focus swung back to Link. "Is that how you seduced her? Some sort of sappy horse taming bullshit while I wasn't paying attention? I knew I should have kept a closer eye on you two. You clearly had far too much free time on your hands."
Link snarled, then froze when he felt Malon lay a hand on his shoulder. "Link! It's done. Put him down."
The farmhand didn't respond, his furious gaze locked with Ingo's disdainful own. Then his arms began to shake from the effort, and he let Ingo down. The rancher gave him an insulted look as he regained his balance and reached up to straighten his collar.
"Malon," Link said through gritted teeth. "Bring me my shield."
Malon glanced between the two men, but the threat of violence seemed to have passed. So she turned and jogged to the barn, retrieving his shield from where he had left it leaning against the wall near the sliding door. She picked it up — momentarily surprised by how heavy it was to be wielded with only one arm — and carried it back to Link, who hadn't let Ingo leave his sight.
Link accepted the shield from her, flipping it over and finally tearing his gaze from Ingo to scan the Sheikah scroll on the rear. He tapped the icon of a glass bottle, pulling it from the scroll in a flash of blue light. The bottle was only a third full as he held it up to the afternoon sunlight, a dollop of crimson liquid swirling at the bottom.
"Here," he said to Malon, passing her the bottle before tossing his shield to the grass. "Dab this on Epona's shoulder. It didn't look deep, so hopefully it won't scar."
Malon turned and put her fingers to her lips, giving a sharp trill. Epona's ears perked and she lifted her head from grazing.
"C'mere, baby," Malon cooed as she pulled the cork with a hollow pop. The mare obeyed her call, coming closer and snuffling at Malon's blouse. Malon bent to the task of inspecting the wound on the mare's shoulder, using her work apron to wipe away a thin stream of oozing blood.
Link turned back to confront Ingo while Malon worked. "The papers, Ingo," he said, holding out his hand.
Ingo continued to grumble to himself. "There's no way that horse should have let you ride it."
"Now, Ingo."
"Fine." Ingo ripped the handful of papers from his overalls and slapped them against Link's chest. He caught them – barely – before they spilled across the lawn, and gathered them into a tidy stack.
"Doesn't matter," Ingo sneered. "I can make more of them. You still don't know where Talon is. He'll sign as many documents as I want."
Malon glanced up from her work. "You made a promise, Ingo," she said, a warning in her voice.
"And I'm following it to the letter, if not the spirit," Ingo replied. He turned back to Link. "That's your problem. The both of you look down on me from your high horse, thinking I'm some sort of imbecile. But I've spent years busting my ass on this ranch. I'll have what's mine, one way or the other."
Link took a threatening step towards Ingo. "Talon's location. Now."
Ingo gulped, but stood his ground. "And who's going to go get him? You? You'd leave Malon alone with me for a week?" At Link's faltering expression, he pressed on. "Or would you take her with you? Leave me unattended here, free to do whatever I pleased? Now that we're done being civil, do you really think I'd just sit around and wait for you to return and kick me out of my home?
"But," A maniacal gleam shone in Ingo's eye. "I can offer you something better."
"You have nothing else I could possibly want, Ingo," Malon called.
"I disagree," Ingo replied. "I have everything you've ever wanted. All you have to do is win one more race."
Link barked a laugh. "No way. We had a deal."
"That was before you tried to swindle me," Ingo said, wetting his lips. "I'm challenging you to a rematch."
"A rematch?" Link raised a skeptical eyebrow. "I already won your papers. What else do you have to barter with?"
"Like I said, everything you originally wanted," Ingo replied. "We'll reverse the original bet. You win a second time, I'll take a horse and leave. You'll never hear from me again. But if I win," He directed a leer towards Malon. "Then we do things my way."
"Deal," Malon cut in before Link could answer. He spun in alarm to find that she'd finished with Epona and was rejoining the conversation. She tossed him the remains of the potion with an underhand pitch as she approached.
Link caught the nearly empty bottle and gave her a worried look. "Mal—"
Malon cut him off. "No. I'm sick of this. We're going to finish it now, one way or the other." She passed Link and pressed a finger to Ingo's chest, her eyes blazing. "I'm not worried at all. We can beat you twice in a row. We can beat you a hundred times. But if you try to weasel out of your bet again, then I won't be held responsible for what happens next."
With a huff Malon turned, not even waiting for Ingo's response. She bent and hefted Link's shield, aiming the backplate towards him. He regarded her carefully for a moment, then without comment he returned the potion bottle to the Sheikah scoll. Malon took Ingo's papers from his hand, hooked the shield over her arm, and carried it back to the barn.
Ingo seemed pleased, stroking a finger along his thick mustache. "Excellent. Of course, since your horse was injured, I suppose that means you'll have to ride the other one. Such a shame."
"Nope, Epona is as good as new," Malon shot back with false cheer. "But you two go ahead and set up, don't wait on me."
Ingo's face soured, throwing a glance at Epona. The mare had returned to grazing, her injured shoulder turned away. He grumbled to himself, something about "cheating" that Link didn't quite catch.
"Once more, Ingo," Link said. "Mount up."
They set up the same as before, Epona pawing the dusty track as the afternoon sun beat down upon them. The mare's shoulder was newly mended, a pinkish patch of bare flesh peeking out from her auburn coat.
Once more Malon cut her hand through the air, and once more they leapt forward from the starting line. Epona powered around the first turn, maintaining a comfortable lead now that Link had the feel of the track. Sanctil was right behind him, but Ingo's mount was still tired from their first race and wasn't able to dog them like before.
Link held onto his lead through the straightaway, around the third and fourth turn, and past the finish line. One lap down, one to go. He kept his head low and spurred Epona onward.
It wasn't until halfway through the second lap that he sensed that Sanctil was no longer hounding their tracks. He threw a quick look over his shoulder, curious, only to find that he was completely, horrifyingly alone.
She was distracted. Looking back on it, she cursed herself for not seeing it coming.
While the men ran their circuit around the track, Malon was sorting through the stack of papers that they had won from Ingo. Her head was down as she scanned the letters, her stomach roiling as she found page after page of utter garbage detailing a life she had never lived. It was the worst fiction she'd ever read. Her, fall in love with Ingo? She would just as soon kiss an octorok.
She wasn't overly concerned with the second race. Link would win. It was inevitable. Sanctil was a good workhorse, but he wasn't a Gerudo Destrier hybrid like Epona. The Lon Lon specialty breed was a true prize in speed and endurance, and Epona had turned out to be their greatest success thus far.
So Malon only gave a passing glance when Link thundered past on the first lap, his head down and his green cap flapping in the wind. She'd already turned back to the letters as Ingo brought up the rear, farther behind than the first race.
She only caught on that something was wrong when a shadow flickered at the edge of her vision, and the sound of hooves started growing much closer than normal. So distracted was she that it took her a moment to glance up, but that was all the warning she had before Ingo's heel caught her across the cheek.
Link finished the lap, his heart racing as he rounded the far side of the corral. A gaping hole opened in his gut as the barn came fully into view. Sanctil trotted along in the distance, riderless, and Malon was nowhere to be seen.
No, there, a flash of red and a sparkle of fireworks. Ingo was retreating between the buildings with Malon slung over his shoulder. Navi, bless her diminutive heart, was busy dive-bombing the rancher in an attempt to keep him distracted. He swiped at the faerie ineffectually, unbalanced with Malon's limp form burdening him, but he never stopped moving forward.
"Ing-ooo!" Link roared, kicking Epona into a full gallop. The rancher turned and blanched as he saw the mare baring down on him. Link stood in the saddle as he approached, ready to leap from his mount, but Ingo reached out and slammed the gate shut, flipping the locking bar into place and blocking the way forward.
Link cursed and jerked Epona's reins to the side before she could crash into the gate. The mare swerved at the last moment, nearly colliding with the wall of the farmhouse. He dropped the reins and pushed down hard, hopping backwards over Epona's rump. His groin barely cleared her powering hind legs, and he skidded to a stop as the mare continued to run along the palisade wall.
Navi rejoined him as he rushed back to the gate, and he was surprised to find the rancher was still standing on the other side. The smug look on Ingo's face set his blood to boiling.
"Ingo you lying bastard!" Link yelled as he threw his shoulder at the gate, sending a lance of fire up his shoulder. The iron locking rod clanged against the brace set deep into the barn's wall, but the unyielding metal didn't budge. He jogged back a couple steps and took a running leap, planting his heel directly on the wrought-iron emblem. The gate rattled again, but held.
Ingo gave an appreciative whistle. "I need to send flowers to the Smiths," he said with a manic grin. "You didn't think I'd let you leave, did you? Just walk out of here after ruining everything I've worked to achieve?"
Link snarled, hamming the gate with his fists. "Put her down, Ingo!"
Ingo chuckled and patted Malon on her rump. "Don't worry, boy. I'm going to take very good care of her," he said, his voice growing soft with deadly promise. With that final threat, he turned and disappeared into the farmhouse.
Link let out a frustrated cry of rage, then spun, taking stock of the situation. He ran for his sword and shield where they lay against the barn, throwing the scabbard across his shoulder. Then he reached for the barn door, yanking the handle. The door held fast, and Link remembered Ingo taking special care to lock it after bringing out their horses. The bastard had been thinking ahead this entire time.
"Ahhh ... Link, what do I do?" Navi cried in panic.
The choice flashed through his mind. Should she stay, or follow Malon? "Find me a way out, quick!" he decided. The faerie zoomed off down the side of the building, wasting no time.
He left his chainmail where it lie, not having the time to spare to throw it on. Then he ran his fingers down his Sheikah scroll, his mind racing. Bombs? No, the lane between the buildings was too narrow. The kitchen and a horse stall would be shredded, and he didn't know where Ingo had taken Malon...
"Link, here!"
He glanced up. Navi was hovering at the corner of the barn, near the second story. A moment later it clicked, and he pulled his hookshot from the Sheikah scroll as he followed his faerie companion.
He raced around the corner, taking a running leap up onto the bench of the parked wagon, and took aim at Navi's glow. She flashed a yellow warning and ducked away the second he pulled the trigger. With a rattle of hydraulics his hookshot lanced out and embedded into the soft wood above the loft window, and then he was sailing through the air.
His feet briefly touched the windowsill as he ducked into the loft, yanking out the barbed head of the hookshot on his way. The instrument clicked in his hand as it reset, his feet churning the hay across his mattress. Without slowing he took aim at the far side of the barn and fired again. The hookshot speared into a horizontal beam on the far side and pulled tight.
He stepped out into open air. His thumb worked the button, retracting the chain as he fell, and he gave the instrument a sharp yank as he reached the apogee of the swing. He landed hard and skidded a few feet, his knees aching with the brunt of his landing, but in an instant he was up and out the side door.
The farmhouse's kitchen door was still ajar. He replaced his hookshot and drew his sword, then charged through with shield raised.
No one greeted him. The house was quiet, the table set for an afternoon meal that had long since passed. Navi darted inside a second before the kitchen door quietly closed behind them.
He held his breath for a moment, cocking his ear. Something had changed. A low purring sound was moving through the house. He took two steps forward, then halted. A faint puff of wind had brushed against his skin, coming from the stairwell. He charged up the stairs, coming out on the landing of the second floor. The door at the end of the hall that led out to the palisade rested on broken hinges, the wood around the lock shattered as if someone had kicked it open.
He stepped outside into the afternoon sun, glancing left towards the Ranch's entrance. But nothing there caught his eye. There were no waiting wagons, no horses galloping into the distance. So he turned right, looking deeper into the ranch, just in time to see Ingo duck into the upper level entrance of the previously locked Windmill #3.
"What the hell?" Link muttered.
Malon knew that she wasn't much of a fighter. She hadn't anticipated that Ingo would pull something like this. When Ingo's boot connected solidly with her face, it set the world spinning like an unbalanced top. Her sight grew dim as pain erupted along her cheek and and brow. As she sprawled in the grass she had the vague sense of being picked up and slung over someone's shoulder like a ham hock, followed by the gentle swaying sensation of someone walking. Then a heated exchange of voices, rumbling low and unintelligible as if from the bottom of a deep canyon. Any attempt to raise her head was met with a wave of nausea.
Her mind worked feverishly to piece together her predicament, but her thoughts were sluggish. Ingo. He had truly gone off the deep end. Where was he taking her? She had an impression of shade for several long moments, though time seemed unusually slippery. Then the sunlight returned, and she felt a sharp jolting in her gut as his bony shoulder bit into her stomach. He was jogging somewhere, as fast as he could move with her slung over his shoulder.
Her senses were coming back to her. She blinked against the afternoon sunlight, but it was hard to see. Her left eye was beginning to swell and her hair stuck to her cheek, tacky with drying blood. Was her nose broken? It was hard to breathe. The throbbing pain in her face formed a ring centered around her eye socket.
She felt Ingo pause, heard the sound of a door with neglected hinges squeal open. Then she was carried into a darkened room.
This was her chance, Malon decided, while his eyes took time to adjust. Without warning she reared up and drove her elbow into the junction of Ingo's neck with all of her strength. Ingo grunted in pain and surprise, cursing as he shoved her away. She felt a brief moment of relief before she fell past the level of Ingo's feet, then panic flared white hot.
She was falling into the yawning void. A moment of terror surged through her as the darkness engulfed her, but the scream was barely ripped from her throat before the floor rushed up to meet her. The floorboards gave a deep, hollow thunk as she landed hard on her belly, her knees and wrists taking the brunt of the fall. Stars erupted before her eyes as her jaw rebounded off the floor and her teeth clicked together. The taste of copper began to flood her mouth. She began to cough heavily as a layer of dust erupted around her in a thin cloud.
She vaguely heard the sound of shuffling from above her. "Now where is— ah!"
A bloom of light pushed back the darkness. Malon grit her teeth against the pain in her wrists as she rolled over. Twisting to look up from her prone position, she found Ingo standing on the catwalk above her, holding a glowing lantern out over the ledge. She blinked in surprise as she finally registered where she was. Why had he brought her to the shuttered windmill?
"Stupid girl," Ingo spat. "I still need you alive."
Above her, he stepped over the ledge and dropped. Malon cried out and held her arms across her body to protect herself, but he landed with both feet framing her legs. Before she could think to launch his family jewels into his throat, he stepped around and reached down with one hand, taking ahold of a tight fist of hair near her scalp. With a grunt he began to drag her backwards along the floor, pulling her deeper into the windmill.
Malon cried out in pain, her fingers clawing at the fist clenched in her hair. Was this really Ingo? Where had he found this strength? Farm work could build muscle, but not like this. It couldn't be simple rage that drove him. There was something otherworldly in the demonic glint in his eyes when he looked down on her.
"Would have been so much easier if Lord Ganondorf had just let me kill you," Ingo said. "But nooo, its was all 'honor debts' this and 'blood oath' that. Lotta noble-sounding horse-shit."
"Let me go! Let me go!" Malon screamed, lashing out with her feet.
Ingo hauled back and landed a punch across her cheekbone, causing another explosion of fireworks to erupt in front of her eyes. Her body went limp, and she felt herself lifted up and dropped on her belly onto a hard metal surface. "Stop wiggling, wench," she heard Ingo mutter above her, his rancid breath beating down on her as she felt her arms lifted over her head.
A length of rusted iron chains was produced, which he quickly wrapped around her wrists. Then he lifted something over his head, and she flinched at the vague shape of a heavy mallet before he brought it down several times in quick succession. The sharp metallic whacks near her scalp caused her to jump with fright. She attempted to pull her arms down, but found herself trapped by an iron stake that had been driven into the metal chute she was laid out on.
"You won't get away with this," Malon groaned into the metal, then felt a weak laugh bubble past her lips. "When Link gets his hands on you, he's gonna tear you in half."
"We'll see," Ingo replied, then slapped her across the mouth. Dazed, she didn't notice when he produced a worn length of rope and shoved it between her teeth, binding it tightly around her head. "Now shut yer trap and be good bait. Your sweetheart will be along shortly, and then I can finally take what I deserve."
Ciao!
Raynre Valence – Sage of Time