Chapter 26: Possession

They didn't get around to meeting up anytime that night; Jinx's induction celebration had meant a movie marathon that had lasted through most of the night into the early morning. By that time everyone was tired and the party declared over, and they were all ready to head in for the night.

As she was getting herself ready for the night, Raven couldn't help but wonder what Robin had wanted to speak to her about.

It could be anything from something as ordinary as looking for ways to keep Slade from gaining control of him—to possibly something more personal. She couldn't help recalling how he'd taken her hands in his as he was beginning to speak with her. How he'd continued to hold onto at least one of her hands as they made their departure from the roof—

Why did he hold my hands like that—

She stifled a yawn as she finished with her evening ritual. Her mind was clouded with sleep—and it was time to catch some. It didn't take her long to accomplish that; as she drew the sheets around and rested her head upon the pillow, she comfortably eased into a deep slumber.

XoXoX

The next morning, while Raven was getting her usual breakfast prepared, Jinx made her entry.

Apparently energized from a decent night's sleep and in as good of a mood as she could be in, Jinx searched out the refrigerator for something to suit her needs. After standing there a few minutes searching the furthest reaches for something—she took out a carton of milk and closed the refrigerator door.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to tweak the grocery list a little after all," Jinx remarked. Raven wasn't sure if she was aiming that comment towards her to hear it out, or if Jinx was talking to herself. "Did you know there's some kind of sick fungal garden growing in there?" She looked at Raven, obviously aiming that exclamation at her.

"That was Star's," Raven replied. "It wasn't my idea."

"Well—that thing's going, and this fridge is getting an overhaul." Jinx dug through the cupboards for something to go with the milk. "At least the cereal boxes are in order—and they're not all expired." She found the brand she wanted, taking that, after closing the cupboard door from which it came, and the milk to the counter while she retrieved a bowl. She poured the contents of the box into the bowl, a mixed blend of oat clusters, almonds, raisins, and bran flakes half filling it. She set aside the box and poured on the milk.

"Sure seems different after escaping that dark void—doesn't it?" Jinx asked her as she brought her bowl of cereal to the table with her. "I mean—seeing this place after it was trashed, and then reconstructed—and then after you all get resituated, minus one—doesn't it seem like a completely different setting than before?"

"It is different," Raven replied. She'd finished getting her breakfast arranged, and brought it to the table with her. "Starfire isn't here, Robin's changed somewhat—and think so have I."

"I've been meaning to ask about a couple of things," Jinx said. "First—I was given a shock somewhere in the night by this mutated bug larvae thing, and I need to know where the hell that thing came from. I wasn't too pleased to see that ugly thing trying to coo in my face when I was trying to sleep."

"That's Starfire's pet Silkie," Raven explained. "An experimental mutant moth larvae that Beast Boy gave her some time back."

"Well—that thing's going back to it's owner," Jinx said, cringing at the thought of Silkie. "I don't tolerate creepy mutant bugs trying to cuddle up with me when I'm trying to sleep."

"I'll see about having him brought over to Titans East," Raven replied. "So—what was the other thing you were going to ask about?"

"I forgot to return this to you," Jinx got out the old handwritten novel she'd uncovered while she'd been exploring Raven's room unauthorized. "I figured you'd have more uses for it then I would. It was a good read—but it needs to go back to you." She pushed it across the table to her. "I managed to get the loose page reinserted. I hope the fact that it fell out won't depreciate its value to you."

"It won't," Raven told her. "Thanks—I'll have to shelf this for future reference, in case I'll ever need it."

"What makes you think it might be needed again?" Jinx exclaimed.

"There's a chance Robin could end up affected by shadow possessions again—and this might come to be useful when that does happen." Raven's expression became solemn, her eyes a bit distant. "That was one of the reasons why Starfire left—she witnessed Robin during one of these failed possessions. She couldn't handle the prospect of it ever happening in front of her again." She looked at Jinx. "Didn't anyone tell you that was why Starfire left—and you were asked to fill her place?"

"Nobody bothered to breathe a word of that to me," Jinx replied. "I figured she couldn't handle the fact that her room had been the portal to evil; I never even guessed it had something to do with a nearly possessed leader."

"Knowing that fact—does it bug you?" Raven asked her. Jinx shrugged.

"I don't think I have to fear the almighty team leader turning evil and then going on some kind of rampage," Jinx stated. "I figure you'd have a way to prevent that from happening—so I'm not gonna let that get to me." She became more serious. "If you don't mind my asking—how did he end susceptible to these shadowy possessions? Why him—and not another member of the team, or yourself?"

"While we were in Gotham, he was attacked, and—as a result—was marked," Raven replied. "Since then, he's been an easy target for possession by the shadow beings—and for Slade."

"Almost sounds like he's been cursed," Jinx said, adding sympathetically, "It's too bad I can't undo curses—I can only dish them out."

"I'm going to try and do that myself," Raven replied. "Starfire seems to think I can do it—and…I think I should be able to."

"Does it have something to do with the fact that you can manipulate and control shadows?" Jinx asked her. Raven nodded. Jinx nodded as well. "Well—I wish you luck with that then."

"Thanks, I appreciate that." Raven went back to concentrating on her breakfast, as did Jinx.

XoXoX

The rest of the team didn't awake until a little after the two girls had finished up with breakfast. When they all started to emerge, the two were chatting on the sectional.

"Been up for a while?" Beast Boy commented as he entered the room. He looked particularly at the two girls. "Uh—are you two actually chatting with each other?"

"Yeah, is there something wrong with that?" Jinx looked at him peculiarly. He cowered a bit and grinned sheepishly.

"No—not at all," Beast Boy replied nervously. "It's just…I'm so used to Raven caught up in a book or something—not a conversation."

"Apparently we have a few things in common that we can talk about," Jinx stated. "Besides—we were just discussing what it's like living in this tower. Apparently, you're all an interesting bunch—and I needed to get the lowdown of what its like if I'm going to live here too."

"I guess that makes sense," Beast Boy replied, sounding a little uncertain. "Heh—I'm just gonna get something to eat, I'm starving."

"Hey—have you seen Robin and Cyborg stirring around yet?" Raven asked him before he could get far.

"Robin's up practicing in the weight room, and Cyborg's doing some tower maintenance," Beast Boy stated. "Cy should be down soon. If you need to see Robin—you're gonna have to go up and see him yourself. I think he's going to be up there training for a while."

"I'm going to go seek out Kid Flash," Jinx said. "If there's anything interesting you need to mention to me later—we can get to it then," she told Raven. She then headed out from the room with no set destination.

"I'm going to seek out Robin," Raven told Beast Boy. "If you end up needing to look for me—I'll be up there."

"Go ahead—have fun," Beast Boy told her, absently digging around for something to eat. Raven took that as a cue to leave while he was occupied.

XoXoX

Sweat accumulated on his brow, one punch following up another. He swung his fist too harshly into the bag; it leaped far backwards and did a pivotal turn—striking back towards him. He effortlessly moved out of the way—already calculating its trajectory course as it came back at him. He got it back into its previous rhythm—putting its comeback course back into an evened out return.

The sounds of his fist striking it jarred all other noise outside that to be acknowledged; partially his focus and attention on his maneuvers blocked all others from his comprehension. His training required focus—and that's what he always imputed into it.

A very heavy amount of focus—

He was so focused—too focused. So much so his awareness didn't acknowledge the overhead lights flickering in an unnaturally—didn't notice there was even an intrusion until he was practically physically forced to.His stance became abruptly rigid—he didn't seem to have any function in any of his limbs. To his own frustration he stood, immobile—frozen in place.

"Why can't I seem to—" he struggled exhaustively to swing his arms or budge his legs, with no effect.

When his arms moved and his legs adjusted themselves under his weight, it wasn't because of him. He let an utterance in pure astonishment.

"What in hell is going on with my—" involuntarily his words halted, his tongue kept from speaking any further on its own accord. The unexpected physical paralysis overran his mind caught in overdrive.

"You should know by know I'd return eventually." It was his own voice—the words formed by his own mouth. But they weren't words he had recalled forming to speak himself.

What is going on here—

"You mean to say you don't recall the last time we struggled against each other for control over you?" His own voice spoke against his own accord. It had come out in a tone that wasn't of his invention—a mocking, strangely musing tone. "I would think you'd especially remember that occasion—considering it threw that one teammate of yours over the edge."

Slade. Robin could feel the fury boiling over within his consciousness. He fought with his will to regain control over Slade. "Because of you—Starfire can't even bear to see my face because memories it brings up frighten her too much. I have you to thank for her even having to live with those memories to begin with."

"She was inevitably going to see what she saw—whether she saw them while with me or from elsewhere," Slade borrowed his vocals yet again. Robin took control back.

"How can you even say that!" Robin snapped harshly. "For all we know—it was your influence and yours alone that drove her to be mentally scarred in the first place! If it weren't for you—she probably wouldn't even be dealing with this baggage now!"

"You were the one who insisted on checking in on a call that left you team vulnerable, Robin," Slade taunted him with his own voice. "It was you negligence that left Starfire vulnerable to abduction—Raven to the injuries she received—as well the effect it left on the rest of the team—"

"Slade, how dare you speak about what you did to Star and Raven—while using my voice!" Robin snapped. "You know what you are, Slade? A monster! Always was and always will be. I will never allow myself to ever become—" The words ceased, his ability to control the very words he spoke ceasing. Try though he might—he couldn't seemed to regain control of that function. Against his control—a sly grin emerged.

"Words can be rewarding and useful in their own respect, but it will always be action in the end that clearly wins." It infuriated Robin that his own voice would be used to mock him; it infuriated him even more that Slade was getting the upper hand.

"It looks like you're losing," His stolen voice mused. "I'm actually disappointed. I was expecting a little bit more of a struggle then that."

He mentally felt like he was fading out—losing his control to the villain he'd always been determined to dominate at any cost. Haplessly he felt like he was losing—that Slade would win—

His last action he could remember being his own was the willing spillage of tears from his tightly clenched eyelids. He struggled with the invading force to keep them shut. A battle he was slowly losing—

XoXoX

She heard his voice from the hall. Alerted and startled by it—Raven had hastened her steps forward to investigate it.

She pushed the door to the weight room open—hearing him hold a conversation with himself. Robin's voice changed drastically with each end change in the conversation; at one end he sounded desperate, at the other—it came out sounding taunting—goading—

She realized what the situation was—what Robin was struggling with. One line involving her name in particular that he said confirmed whom he was struggling with.

Slade's trying to possess him—

She didn't hesitate in rushing over to him. Whether he recalled her being there—or if Slade's presence did for that matter—it didn't show. By the time she'd reached him, most of his struggles were being made inwardly. When she removed his mask and noticed his eyelids twitching—as if struggling to remain shut—she was able to confirm that thought.

She was startled to see tears spill from his clenched eyes and run down his face. In concern, she used her fingers to gently brush them away.

"I won't allow him to win," she assured him in a soft voice. "So you really don't need to cry."

Please don't tell me I'm too late—

She hesitated; tears formed in her own eyes just as he seemed to be losing the inward battle.

No—

She couldn't just stand there and watch as he lost control of himself to their foe. Hoping she could still salvage him from the darkness she reached her hands up to the sides of his face, bringing herself to him until she made contact mouth to mouth.

She couldn't sense if there were any changes happening within him; he stood rigid and stiff—like a soul still possessed. She couldn't recall how long it took to get a reaction last time; she wasn't sure if she even would—

She got the slightest sense of his rigid stance loosening up as she kept her grip on him. She didn't open her eyes to observe him—but she heard what she thought was him shifting one of his feet to a different angle. It wasn't until she felt his hands rest on her waist did she realize he was coming out of that possessive trance.

Thinking that he would eventually try to gently pull away from her, she was shocked when he tightened his grip on her waist and brought her closer. When he eventually did pull away from her—it was obviously to catch his breath.

"Thank you, Rae," Robin said to her, his voice a little hoarse. "I didn't think I'd recover that time. That was good timing."

"You're welcome," Raven replied softly. "Um…was there a reason why you held onto me more tightly partway into that?"

"Would it be okay to say that I wanted to?" Robin stated. She again found herself staring into eyes that were usually hidden—bright blue eyes she wished she'd seen more often—"That maybe—I wanted to do that up on the roof last night, before we were interrupted?"

"W-was that the reason why you took my hands in yours? You were eventually—going to kiss me?" Raven asked him, shocked as she thought about what she'd just said.

"If Cy hadn't interrupted us—if Jinx hadn't have shown up when she did…I would've also eventually gotten around to telling you what I meant to say last night," Robin said. "Besides all this turmoil I've been dealing with—I've been thinking over what you asked me back in that realm of darkness. I wanted to let you know I'd made up my decision last night—but I didn't get my chance." He repeated the gesture he'd made last night—taking her hands up in his, and looking her in the eye directly. He could feel the accumulation of sweat increasing on his brow—too fresh to be from his workout or his mental struggles for control over himself. He'd been nervous the evening before; he recalled that as he found his eyes firmly fixated with hers.

Just say the words already—she's watching you very closely, and she's sure to notice the fact that you're nervous—say it before she can point it out—

"So—what were you going to say to me?" Raven's fixated eyes spoke her curiosity. A moment later they were showing him shock when his hands unexpectedly dropped hers and reached for something elsewhere. He surprised himself with his own move; the moment had quickly blurred from him acknowledging his hands holding hers to the next where they were cradling her chin.

"Rae—" Why can't I just bring myself to say this? "We've been friends for a long time—you've had my back many times when I needed it, and I've also had yours. To return and find you in as bad a shape as I did—where I wasn't even sure if you'd survive or not…I was deeply affected by that; I couldn't keep myself from running that thought over in my head constantly. And over the course of our trip—you kept trying to keep my hopes up even as I lost hope of finding my mentor alive…and then when we did find him…" Robin closed his eyes for a moment, trying to hold back any tears that might attempt to spill forth. "You of course had the touch that would save him—words that almost came straight from the doctor himself." He looked at her and laughed suddenly. "For whatever your past might've burdened you with—you have the healing touch. Hell—you've even healed me—and will probably continue to heal me." He drew her into an embrace that quite surprised her—enough to make her knees buckle under her weight.

They both tumbled instantly to the mats below their feet—with her landing on her back and him just able to keep himself from landing on top of her by supporting himself with his arms.

He hovered over her, looking down as he had her unintentionally pinned down below him. She didn't move; She only looked back up at him, breathing hardly.

"If I surprised you, Rae—I apologize," Robin said as he watched her. She still looked shocked, but she didn't look back at him irritably. Slowly, a smile formed on her face.

"You don't have to apologize," Raven told him. "Uh—so…was that what you were going to say to me then?"

"I didn't really get to the main part of what I meant to say," Robin told her. She gazed back at him, remaining still as he hovered above her. "What I really wanted to add was that I really care about you."

"Really care—huh?" Raven remarked. "Then—why are you acting so nervous?" She gazed up at him with critical eyes.

"I guess…what I really mean is—" Robin hesitated, leaning in a little closer to her. She suddenly seemed to hold her breath as he lessened the distance between them. "Rae…what I really think is I...I…might—love you."

She said not a word—obviously speechless. Her amethyst eyes were slightly widened, as they remained fixated with his. He slowly leaned in closer—those wide amethyst eyes unconsciously closing as the gap narrowed. By the time he'd come in contact with her she wasn't watching him—only feeling the connection physically.

She felt out where the sides of his face were as she brought up her hands. She cradled the sides of his head in her hands while keeping her back comfortably supported on the mat beneath her. She felt time melt away slowly until he chose to pull himself away from her. When she acknowledged that fact—she was looking up at him, unable to speak a word. His eyes were trained on hers, an unexpected affection expressed within their vivid hue.

"You're one of the most important people in my life," Robin told her, still holding himself propped above her with his arms. She remained lying still where she was; content enough with her current position. "Over time…I've come to realize that—other than Star—you've been someone I've been able to rely on, get deeper advice from, and has seen a side of me very few others have. Like she did—you understand me from a perspective few others do."

"You don't ever wish that I was Starfire though—do you?" Raven asked him curiously. "Because—you know I could never be like her."

"No," Robin replied softly. "I know you can't be—I'd never expect you to be like her."

"I appreciate that at least." Raven brought her hands up, resting them again on the sides of his face. She watched him, smiling contently. He was just about to lean in to kiss her again when the sound of the door being pushed open and a set of footsteps interrupted him.

"I wasn't expecting y'all to be…uh—making out up here," Cyborg noted as the two scrambled to get themselves in more presentable positions. "Especially considering that the other day she thought you were the one giving her the cold shoulder."

In the scramble Robin kept his face obscured from view of Cyborg in the doorway, with Raven being helpful by placing herself in the way. He quickly searched around for that one missing ensemble piece.

"Try looking under my right palm," Raven told him under her breath. "You'll find what you're looking for there."

"Are ya hiding something?" Cyborg asked them, amusement obvious in his voice.

"No—what makes you think that?" Raven exclaimed.

"Cuz—the great Boy Wonder seems to be hiding behind ya, and it kinda hints at something like that," Cyborg noted. "I should've known something's up after seeing the two of ya last night holding hands and looking like you were making confessions to each other. " His amused expression became serious. "So—did you two begin making this kind of connection while the rest of us were trapped in that void? I'm not sure I'd approve of that sort of thing—especially with how Star was effected by all that void stuff."

"No Cy—we were too busy looking for a way to save you guys and find out what happened to my mentor to even think about that," Robin replied, perturbed. "We both put you guys' recovery above any possibility of a romance between us—it didn't even come up as being possible until everything else had been said and done." He'd replaced the mask while his back was turned away from him. He turned and stood to face his questioning teammate. "You guys should know by now that I put the sake of the team and those I care about above almost everything else."

"Yeah, man—most of the time you do—but I do recall a few times in the past where your persistence on something else has dominated over the importance of even that," Cyborg reminded him tartly. "Especially if the circumstances somehow involved Slade. When it comes down to it—you've always been more obsessed with figuring Slade out then anything else."

"On most—if not all of those occasions—didn't I in the end put all of you guys first when it came to my mission to figure Slade out?" Robin retorted, his anger rising. "You, BB, Star—Rae? Did I ever let it get to the point where you were all doomed at his hands—because of me? Or do you at all recall that I fought for your sake in the end?"

"Maybe I do—maybe I don't," Cyborg remarked derisively. "It's not really me or BB I'm all that concerned with in this—we don't matter quite as much as someone else that's had me worried this whole time. The one I'm really getting infuriated for is Star."

"You don't think I haven't been burdened down by thoughts of what kind of turmoil she's been going through?" Robin snapped, his voice cracking. "How can I even try to reconcile anything when she can't bear to even see my face? I can't keep letting that eat me up inside—and I can't force her to do anything she's not comfortable with!" He sunk to his knees, looking down towards the floor. "If you had actually witnessed her reaction while I was being possessed right in front of her—you might understand a little better." He looked up at Cyborg, anger mixed with anguish in his expression. "Starfire looked absolutely terrified— like she saw death itself or something on that level. I have never seen her so frightened in my life!"

"Yo, man—she couldn't really have seen death when she saw you possessed," Cyborg remarked skeptically. "She was probably just so shocked by you being—"

"STOP!" Raven cried, interrupting their argument. "You really don't need to fight like this!"

"Rae—" Cyborg uttered before she interrupted him.

"Do either of you really know what Starfire went through in all this—what continues to haunt her about it even now?" Raven continued. She stood up. "If anyone understands what she's going through—it would be me." She sighed a bit mournfully as she turned her attention directly towards Cyborg. "Robin wasn't really exaggerating when he described Star's reaction as looking like she saw death itself before her. She told me personally that was exactly what she saw on that day. She couldn't bear to see his face because she couldn't bear to see his death relived in front of her eyes over and over. It agonized her—and it would've brought her more agony if she actually witnessed it happening right in front of her—especially if it were in any way influenced by Slade himself."

"Rae—when did Star confront you on this?" Robin asked her. She turned to him, her expression solemn.

"Later in the evening of the day I woke up in the hospital," Raven reminded him—both of them. "She stopped in at around midnight to pay me a visit when she knew I would be alone. She needed to speak with me about a few things— Robin's possessive episode, reassuring herself that I wasn't also affected by the shadows…as well as asking me if I'd watch over Robin for her. She—knew I was capable of dispossessing him of them if the moment ever arose—that I was probably the only one capable of doing so. She…also overheard me say something to him while I was making my desperate pleas to him during his possession with that shadow being back in the void. That…I love him." Cyborg's eyes went wide—so did Robin's. "If you need to know that she wasn't angry with me about that—trying confirming it with her directly. I'm sure she'll vouch for what I just told you."

"I'm gonna have to ring Bee up and get that confirmed with Star," Cyborg stated. He looked at Raven directly. "It's not that I don't believe you—I just need to hear this from her myself."

"So…Starfire told you—to watch over me?" Robin asked her.

"Yes, she asked me to watch over you—as a favor to her," Raven replied softly. "She still cares very deeply for you, but—she acknowledges that it's no longer possible for her to be able to be here and love you both at the same time. She thinks—I'll be able to keep you safe."

"I don't know if either of ya noticed the lights flickering a little earlier—but I've been meaning to ask y'all about it, if you know anything about it," Cyborg spoke up. "If y'all were wondering—that's what I really came up here to investigate."

"I didn't really notice it," Robin admitted. "I was concentrating too much on my practice rounds with the punching bag to notice it—and then I was too occupied dealing with Slade trying to possess me again to even be able to concentrate on something like the lighting."

"I recall seeing the hall lights flicker as I was making my way up here," Raven noted. "It eerily coincided with the timing I discovered Robin was struggling with Slade trying to possess him."

"Sounds like our archenemy's presence sends up warning signals before he shows his ugly self," Cyborg commented. "I guess I'll know that for next time, so I won't suspect that the tower's power source might be malfunctioning—after all its been through recently."

"So Cy…do you still feel the need to argue something out with me—or have we managed to get everything worked out?" Robin questioned him particularly, tensed and ready to put up an argument if the need should rise. Cyborg's reassuring grin allowed him to relax.

"Nah, man—I think I'm all argued out," Cyborg replied. "Raven managed to be the voice of reason that kinda took the point of arguing out of the picture."

"That's a good thing," Raven remarked.

"There is something I do wonder about," Cyborg stated, looking at the two of them. "When did you two start deciding that ya had feelings for one another on this kinda level? Besides that little instance from last night—I never really noticed any signs that you two were even more than just friends."

Raven turned her gaze over towards Robin—wondering just when it was that she started realizing that he was becoming more than just a friend in her eyes. She'd always held him in higher regard over most others—but when had it gone from being more than even that, she had to wonder—

Rae—I have a lot of faith in you—words he'd spoken to her, from what seemed like such a long time ago—in a tone spoken in reassurance. She could recall him turning his gaze to her—just before he'd revved the engine of his R-Cycle—taking the moment to tell her that so she knew he didn't think she should worry herself over that entry in that one book.

I have a lot of faith in you. Never forget that, okay? She continued to watch him, a faint smile emerging on her face as she thought about that. Robin, don't worry—I won't forget. She didn't recall if that was the moment she started to inwardly realize that she cared more about him than she ever had warranted herself to before or if was just a random occurrence that just happened to come to mind; even if it wasn't—its was definitely a pivotal moment in her coming to the realization.

"I think it might be a little too hard for me to determine exactly when it was that things started to head towards that direction when it comes to my feelings for him," Raven stated. "All I can say is that its not something that just—happened overnight." Her gaze remained on Robin, not bothering to look directly at Cyborg as she spoke. In her mind, as she'd spoken—she'd wondered to herself if he even knew when he himself had come to that sort of realization—if he even had one of those moments. With her eyes all the time remaining on him as she spoke and thought over things—she wondered if he was recalling some moment like she just had—

"I'd have to say that I would state the same as Rae on this," Robin added in his answer. "Its—like she stated…something that didn't occur overnight."

"I guess I'm just gonna have to be content with that," Cyborg conceded. "So, ah—I've still got a lot of maintenance left yet to check in with, so…if y'all are intent on using this space for what its intended for—or if y'all continue with what'cha both were up to when I barged in…I guess I'll leave ya to that." He looked at them awkwardly—frozen up for a moment, before he bothered to depart.

As the doors swung behind where Cyborg had made his exit, the two exchanged looks—not certain which suggestion he'd made they should act upon.