Twenty Six: You Own Me

Tobias's POV

For a moment, I stand at the midst of the hallways, waiting to feel Eliza's absence behind me. When I can no longer sense her, I decided to have dinner at the dining hall as though nothing has just happened. It's been two years, then. Two years since we've been together. But I could tell that a lot of changes have occurred as those years passed by. Eliza started off as the type of person who has a sense of humor. She can also put wit in a conversation whenever we talk and can switch one subject to another. No wonder she's an Erudite. However, as much as she likes talking, she hasn't shared enough details about herself. Let's say I've been her boyfriend and I knew about her favorite color, food, hobby, and the things she used to do on her old faction. But once I asked her about her parents, the information that she gave seemed rehearsed and idealistic. I tried to push her for more yet she quickly changed the matter.

But as evident as it is, we are somehow even. She didn't tell me much about her former life and I didn't let her in of my fear landscape. Fair enough.

Later, I arrive at the dining hall. Someone instantly welcome me once I've stepped in. Oh no, correction. They were, in fact, two people.

"Four, join us here!"

"We're actually waiting for you to come. Where've you been?"

Not hesitating, I take the seat opposed from Lauren and Tori. Lauren is chewing food while Tori gulp water from her glass. At the corner of my eye, I've already spotted my and Lauren's former initiates, all together again in one table. I easily had the glimpse of Tris and Uriah sitting side by side that makes me recall the way I embraced Tris this morning. If she is in love with Uriah, I wonder why she would sound concern when she asked me to take good care of myself. Moreover, I somewhat don't get the point of why she allows me to do gestures such as kissing her in the forehead and folding her in my arms. But anyway, I don't think she's the type of girl who'd cheat on her boyfriend with her previous instructor. Maybe all the words and things we've said and done to each other recently are nothing but brotherly actions to her. Maybe there's nothing really going on between us but the fact that from considering me as her instructor, she now sees me as her brother. Talk about fascinating.

"I'll just grab myself dinner." Lauren and Tori nod as I rise from my chair. I meet the Dauntless lunch lady at the counter who appears to be ten years older than me, considering the way she pulled her hair up in a messy bun. When she asked me what I wanted and I spoke, she jerks a smile on my way.

The moment she's given me the tray with the meal I've chosen, I was about to go back to my table. But before I could turn away, she inquired me a question first that I didn't think she'd mind to ask.

"Why can't I see Eliza?"

She peeks at the room behind me to find a sign of my ex-girlfriend and even me joins her in searching so I won't just stand there awkwardly. When I turn my look back at her and her focus lands on me again, I tell her this, "We just broke up."

"Oh," she tilts her head back. "Not a good thing, isn't it?"

It was, I think, a good choice.

I refuse to answer her this time. I don't care if it's rude of me but I just twirl around to go back to the table. She won't even pay heed to my action, I suppose. She'd rather think it's a natural thing about me—having a cold attitude. But it's not really that way. I just can't find being kind as easy sometimes.

I glide my tray on the table and sit. Right away, I forget about the lunch lady's question and goes back to answering Lauren's.

"I talked to Eliza." I separate the spoon from the fork. "I reckoned there's a reason for me to do so."

"Not being a meddler but… what did you talk about?" Lauren's chewing again.

"I found out something about her, Lauren." I taste the beans on my plate. "And she's been acting strange since the last few days."

"And she didn't go to work yesterday." Tori inserts.

"That's another thing. That is because she left the compound but I haven't followed her so I'd know where she was going. I suddenly heard Peter and Zeke bickering to each other so I went to figure out what was going on. Eliza's out of my attention."

Lauren narrows her eyes. "Peter and Zeke? What was it all about?"

I glance at the other tables to check if somebody can overhear then when I'm assured that it's safe, I begin sharing the details.

"If you have heard about what Peter did to Tris…"

I'm not giving much yet but their eyes widen already. That meant to say that they knew about it.

"I feel bad for Tris after he did that crap to her, you know." Tori plays with her fork. "Was he out of his mind?"

"He is totally out of his mind." Lauren says bitterly. "He looks good with those wounds on his face."

When they're done expressing their reactions, I continue.

"Sure you did hear. The quarrel between him and Zeke was concerned about that matter. Zeke was interrogating Peter of why did he do such thing and who ordered him to do it. And in a sudden… Eliza's name was mentioned."

Tori, who's just about to feed herself with the spoon of potato pieces, slowly bring her hand down and stare at me in disbelief. On the contrary, Lauren mouths the word, "What?"

"What?" she says at last. "You mean to say that she—"

"Yes, she did. Peter confessed it. And I just went at the control room this morning to see how they formed the scheme. There were two videotapes that showed them talking. That said much."

"W-what…. What on earth was she thinking?" Lauren lays her hands in front her to state emphasis. "What did she say to you?"

Tori thickens her voice. "Eliza does hate Tris. It's pretty obvious especially when they're on the same shift on work. As a matter of fact, I think she doesn't like me too."

"She was denying it." I turn my head to the right direction with furrowed eyes. "She was acting strange so nobody will suspect about what she's doing. And she was convincing me that Tris's the root of all of these. But when I've found out about her charade, I was more convinced about the fact that she's a liar."

Lauren and Tori continue to watch me. By the way I talk about Eliza; it's already evident that we're over. I suppose they've pictured that on my face.

"So… um… you two are… done?" I think Tori thought twice of asking but I say it anyway.

"Yes we are."

Lauren smirks as she taps the table twice quietly in order not to disturb the others. "Finally!"

Tori laughs. "Seems like you're not Team Eliza."

Lauren rolls her eyes. "Oh, definitely not." And then she turns her gaze on me. "You know that Four, right? I've told you before that I don't like Eliza. So I think you won't be offended with how I reacted. Aren't you?"

"Not at all."

Soon, I close the subject about Eliza. For a moment we don't say anything to focus on our food. Lauren's about to be finished, the same thing with Tori; but I don't hurry to empty my plate. As I swallow another spoon of beans, my head automatically move to its left—right at the table where Tris and her friends are—right where she and Uriah are. I shouldn't assume that Tris feels something special about me as the way I feel about her. I shouldn't believe that she sees me as something else for I've just figured out that I am just like a brother to her. By the way she and Uriah look at each other states the obvious that they are truly in love.

I pick my glass to drink some water. When it flows down to my stomach, my stomach clenched. Here it comes again. This feeling. Not here, Four. Not here.

But they are here. And I couldn't prevent myself from looking at them; from witnessing how sweet they are. Uriah leans closer to Tris and rubs his nose against hers. In feedback, Tris giggles and kisses his nose. Stomach clench, stomach clench. Then, as I continue to watch, and as I've already forgotten about my food, I have the sudden sensation that Uriah's going to do it now. I've already seen it coming. He's going to do it.

And then, just like what I was expecting, he does it. He kisses her slightly on the lips. Tris tilts her head back a little but she doesn't protest about the kiss. His lips stay on hers for a few more seconds until I finally have the urge to look away. To avoid having Lauren and Tori read me, I just thought of finishing this dinner now. When I'm done with this, I can walk out of here without them wondering why. There's an excuse like, "Maybe there's work on the control room." Or, "Got to go to the apartment. See you both tomorrow."

Fortunate that I've resist not to look at Tris and Uriah, I stand up from my chair. Good thing that didn't surprise either Lauren or Tori.

"Where're you leading at, Four?" Lauren does the same thing. "I'm going with Tori at the parlor. Just to chit-chat."

I shrug. "Apartment."

She nods. "See you around, then."

I nod too.

When I've separated ways with Lauren and Tori, I twist the excuse that I've made around. I didn't go to my apartment. I went to the Chasm instead.

I lean at the railing as the water hits the rocks and the stoned-walls. The roaring is somehow soothing but it doesn't calm my thoughts at any rate. I keep on flashing back to that kiss. Yeah, maybe it's just a light kiss but it's still a kiss. Tris, likewise, seemed as though she liked it. Well what the hell am I thinking anyway? He's her boyfriend. When I and Eliza were still together, we also do that kind of stuff. And maybe that is the point here. We're not a couple anymore. I'm back to single. I'm back to the status of being with no one but my heart is taken. Taken by a girl who's already owned by somebody else. Taken by a girl who only sees me as her elder brother telling her to be careful as though she'd get her knee scratched. This is insane.

Problem is I want to be something more to Tris. But I guess I am not an expert at expressing feelings so my approach is being misinterpreted as friendly. I'm no-romantic too. I am not the type of guy like Uriah who knows the exact words that a girl does want to hear. I'm more of as intimidating, complex, and a mystery. And once, or maybe a lot more times before, Tris accused me for taunting her. In other words, she pictures me as the same scary instructor who pointed the gun to Peter and who lectured Christina that the first thing to learn here in Dauntless is to shut their mouths. And, if I am not mistaken, that isn't her type. At the same time, I don't know how to be someone she'd like.

As my thoughts go deeper and deeper like the water, I feel as though someone has been listening to them in secrecy. I can't tell how I felt it but my back prickles with chill and there are eyes locked on me.

I was planning to turn my head around to verify if my sensation is right but a voice—so small but stable—said my name in a manner that alarmed me.

"Four?"

And then finally, I turn around. There I see the girl who owns my thoughts.

Tris.

A/N: Hey guys! There's new Divergent movie news! Sadly, VERY SADLY, Brenton Thwaites is no longer on the options. :'( *crying mode* and the casting for Four is now to 3 actors named as Alex Pettyfer, Lucas Till, and Jeremy Irvine. Jeremy was just new to me so I decided to watch some of his interviews on Youtube. I think he's okay with me. I also watched the trailer of his movie, "Now Is Good" where he starred with Dakota Fanning and I thought he's handsome and he can act! If you want to see him act, then I recommend you to see that movie. And now that Colton Haynes, Drew Roy and Brenton Thwaites won't be Four, I'm hoping that Jeremy will get it instead. Who knows right? Maybe he and Shailene do have chemistry on screen!

ANYWAY, on the idea of this chapter, my dear friend, MagdeLenaJones helped me. She was the one who gave me the idea of Uriah and Tris being lovey-dovey and the idea when Uriah kissed Tris. : ) Also, I'd like to grant your wish of Uriah falling in love with Tris. I think that'd be a good plot twist! : )

And, of course, as always, upon writing this chapter, I was listening to the song, Six Degrees of Separation by The Script. I just love that band! : )

Till the next chapter,

Iris Molefoursted