Author's Note: See? I told you it would only be 2 days and I just made it! I want to take this time to thank you for all the wonderful reviews! I really love you for them. I'm so sorry I haven't been able to reply to any of them lately, but I want you to know that they mean a lot to me. Keep them coming!

Chapter 26 - No More Secrets

"George tried to kill himself tonight."

"What?!"

She nodded. "He used a slicing charm to cut into his wrists. And possibly a blood-thinning potion. Ron stopped the bleeding as much as he could and got him to St. Mungo's. Ron is completely beside himself. He barely pulled together long enough to get a message to us. He's with his parents at the hospital. Percy went to Hogwarts to get Ginny. We sent word to Charlie, but it will take him at least over night to get the proper Portkeys. I figured you would want to know right away." She glanced at Malfoy. "I'm sorry if I interrupted anything."

"No, it's fine. I'll go now."

Harry ran into the study where he had left his cloak that afternoon. Draco followed him in.

"I'll go with you if you need me."

"No, but thanks. I don't know how long I'll be, but would you stay here? I want to come home to you."

Draco nodded. "I'll be waiting."

Moments later Harry and Hermione left for the hospital. Harry spotted Mr. Weasley first, sitting in the waiting room with his arm around his wife. She was sobbing into a handkerchief and didn't even seem to notice their arrival. Bill and Fleur sat across from his parents, both looking worried. Harry took a second look around before spotting Ron on the far side of the room. He was leaning against the wall, staring at the floor. His skin was shockingly white, his face expressionless. Hermione went straight to him while Harry hung back. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. He felt like there was something he should say. Some bit of comfort he could offer the people who had given him a place in their family. Every time he looked at Mrs. Weasley over the last five months he saw the pain she carried from losing her son. And each time he wished that there was something he could do to fix it. To make it not hurt for her anymore. But what could he say that would make a difference at a time like this? He turned away and immediately locked eyes with Bill. He understood. There was nothing to say. The important thing is that they would all go through this together.

A few minutes later a mediwitch entered the waiting room and Ron finally moved away from the wall so that he could hear everything she had to say.

"We expect George will recover completely. The young man who brought him here did a good job slowing down the bleeding. We were able to stop it completely and he was just given another blood replenishing potion. It should take a couple hours for it to work completely, but he can start having visitors shortly. Just a few people at a time though, please."

Mrs. Weasley had taken the handkerchief away from her face and now looked up at the witch with watery, red eyes. "How does...? Why would he...? I didn't know that he was having problems, you know. I would have... done something to help him if he had told us."

Harry felt tears welling up and heard Hermione sniffle from just behind him. They all knew that George was having a hard time dealing with his brother's death, but none of them could have predicted this. Mrs. Weasley's voice carried with it the same confusion that Harry was feeling and his heart broke for her.

The mediwitch smiled kindly and sat down next to the distraught mother.

"Believe it or not, we've seen a lot of this over the last year. It's called 'post-traumatic stress.' It happens a lot during and after war. If a person has endured a trauma or suffered a loss sometimes it's just too much to cope with."

"George fought in the battle of Hogwarts," said Bill. "His twin, Fred, died there. He seemed to be dealing with it okay at first."

"Sometimes it takes a while to appear noticeable to others, especially if you are not familiar with the symptoms. It often brings on depression and the person withdraws from people or stops doing things they used to love."

Harry thought about his inventions. To the best of his knowledge the only thing he actually completed since Fred died was his birthday present. Even his involvement with the Order, Harry believed, was only due to his sense of obligation. George went where he was assigned, but there was no real energy put into it. He didn't seem to really care about it.

"That does sound right," Mr. Weasley said. "He hasn't been quite himself since... Well, none of us have."

"I've been a mediwitch for over twenty years. The same sort of thing happened after the first war. I've seen a lot of this and I know that nothing I say will help you stop second guessing yourself. I know you think that you should have known how to help him, but the important thing is that he's going to be fine and he will get the help he needs now."

Mrs. Weasley wiped the tears off her face. "I thought we were done with this. You know?"

"This is part of it. War leaves lasting impressions on all of us. This is part of how we must move on."

The mediwitch left a few moments later, promising to come get them when George could have visitors. It seemed like years to Harry before she came back. He was acutely aware of every movement or sound in the room. Mrs. Weasley had mostly stopped crying, but every sniffle she emitted was magnified across the silent room. It made him want to run out the door and back to Draco. It wasn't fair. Why should a family like the Weasleys have to go through this? Hadn't they given enough?

Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were the first to go in to see George and it seemed like another eternity passed while they were gone. Nobody spoke. In fact, they all avoided each other's eyes. Bill got up and paced for a few moments before Fleur grabbed his hand and pulled him back into the seat next to her. She didn't say anything, but continued to hold his hand while he fidgeted in his chair. Harry glanced over at Ron and Hermione. She wasn't touching him, but watched nervously while he stared down at the floor. Harry was just feeling useless. There was nothing he could say, and no one to comfort even if he could think of something to say.

When Mr. and Mrs. Weasley finally came out of George's room, she was crying again and he looked pale and grim. Silently, he nodded to Bill, indicating that they could go in. Bill looked over to them.

"We'll wait and go in with Ginny and Percy. The two of you should go in with Ron."

After just a moment's hesitation the three of them quietly entered the room. George was staring out the dark window and made no indication that he heard them come in. Harry felt even more useless in there. What does one say to a man who just tried to end his life?

"How are you feeling, George?" Hermione ventured.

Nothing. Not even a blink of the eyes. Had he been silent for his parents too?

"We're only worried about you, you know. None of us want... anything bad to happen to you." She pushed Ron forward a little to encourage him. He walked until he came to the foot of the bed and finally George turned his head to face him.

"You shouldn't have done it, little brother." His voice was flat, dead, and it startled them all. "Why couldn't you just let me end it? You had to be the fucking little hero, didn't you?"

"I shouldn't have done... ?" Suddenly all the color came back into Ron's face and he stood straighter. "Fuck you, George!"

Hermione let out a surprised gasp and Harry stared at his friend.

"Fuck you. You know personally, I think if you're that fucking selfish you should just go ahead and do it, but Mum doesn't deserve this! You think your pain is more than anyone else so you just decide offing yourself might even the score? Mum was finally starting to accept that he's gone! She could say his name without crying and you go and do something so stupid and selfish!"

"Ron, no," Hermione whimpered.

Harry, getting over his shock, stepped forward and put a hand on Ron's arm. "Let's go, mate."

Ron pulled his arm out of Harry's grasp, focus never leaving his brother. "You're a bloody coward. Do you think this is what Fred would want you to do?"

"You don't know what it's like to lose a part of you like that! You don't know!" George was practically screaming now and angry tears spilled down his face.

"So that justifies causing Mum and the family more pain?" Ron yelled back. Then his voice dropped to a low hiss. "If it weren't for her I would have left you on that floor to die!"

Harry grabbed him by both arms and more forcefully this time. Ron was shaking with rage and let Harry push him out of the room. Hermione was left standing there still, staring at George, her expression one of horrified shock.

"He didn't mean it," she squeaked, although she wasn't too sure about the truth in her words.

"Yes, he did," George replied. He turned back to stare out the window again.

Once outside the room Ron shook loose of Harry and ran down the hall and out of the ward.

"What happened?" asked Mr. Weasley. "We heard raised voices and..."

"Ron said some things he's going to regret. I'm sorry."

Harry grabbed his cloak and Ron's and followed. At the end of the hall he ran into Lee and Angelina just arriving. She tried to ask him something, but he only pointed toward the Weasleys and continued after Ron, hoping that he could catch him.

He caught up just outside of the hospital. Ron was leaning against the building, standing in the rain. He held the cloak out silently and Ron took it.

"A little harsh, don't you think?"

Ron huffed and put the cloak on. He looked like he wanted to hit something.

"You realize how much pain a person has to be in before they decide to kill themselves? I've had my share of bad days, but I've never felt that bad."

"You walked right up to Voldemort with the intention of dying, Harry."

"That was somewhat different. I did that to end the war and kill Voldemort. I've never wanted to die just to end my own pain." That wasn't entirely true, but he felt that adding, "unless under torture" wouldn't strengthen his point.

"But he caused everyone else more pain."

"Yes, and for a guy like George, who loves his family very much, the pain had to have been pretty bad for him to forget everyone else. I'm not saying he was right in doing it. Suicide... well you're right, sometimes it is selfish, but someone who's gone that far... He doesn't need your judgment right now."

Ron shook his head stubbornly. "I didn't ask to walk in and find him like that, Harry. I thought he was dead at first. There was so much blood. Imagine if Mum had gone over there, if she had found him!"

"But she didn't."

Ron nodded and let out a long sigh. "I reckon Hermione's going to kill me. And if she doesn't then Mum will."

"Yes."

"I know I deserve it."

"Yes." Harry nodded his head in agreement. He could hear the regret already in Ron's voice.

"Bloody hell. What am I going to say to him now?"

"You're going to say, 'George, like it or not, you're my brother and you're just going to have to live with all the stupid shit that comes out of my mouth.'"

"I guess that covers it pretty well." He stared down at his shoes for several moments. "Thanks. For pulling me out of there when you did. I don't know what I was going to say next, but it couldn't have been good."

"That's what I'm here for."

They stood in silence. Harry knew there wasn't much more that could be said about it and Ron was likely mentally beating himself for how he had spoken to George. All that he could do now is stand there supportively like a good friend, no matter how useless it made him feel. After several minutes Ron cleared his throat hesitantly.

"So did Malfoy go home or is he waiting for you?"

"He..." Harry had started to answer with the truth, that Draco would be there at Grimmauld Place when he returned. And then he stopped himself. Why would Ron think that Draco would stay so late? Ron had to have figured it out by now. Or, more likely, Hermione figured it out and told him. He was being unnervingly calm about it though, staring straight ahead, careful not to catch Harry's eye. Rather than make something up or outright lie, Harry took a deep breath and decided to come clean. "He's waiting up for me."

Ron nodded.

"You're not going to hex me?"

"No."

"I just thought that after your reaction to me and Ginny, that you would have something more to say."

"Actually, I'm kind of relieved."

"Relieved?"

"Well, at least now I know that it wasn't really your fault things didn't work out with her."

Harry let out an amused snort at that. It made sense in a Ron sort of way.

"And, you know, he's not a complete arse." It was as if Ron felt obligated to say something nice about Harry's boyfriend and he couldn't quite pull it off.

"Now you're lying."

"You're right. I am. He's still an arsehole."

"Yes, sometimes he is."

"But you like him."

"Yes. I really wanted to tell you… Well, I put it off and then all this with getting the Order back together… I guess it just made it easy to not say anything. There were more important things to do. At least, that was my excuse."

"You thought we would hate you."

"Well, I didn't think you would be this calm about it. I kept telling myself that it had to be at the right time, so it would go more smoothly, but… Well, this is definitely not how I wanted to have this conversation."

"No, it's not really the ideal place for telling your best mate that you're gay. I just… You and me-- since when did we have secrets like this? You know everything about me and… I don't know…"

Harry frowned. He'd been so worried about his own feelings being hurt by coming out that he hadn't stopped to consider how the secret would make his friends feel. "I'm sorry, Ron. I didn't mean to keep things from you. You and Hermione should have known from the beginning."

"Maybe you were right though. Maybe I would have started yelling and we wouldn't have talked for another month. Now I've had time to get used to the idea. I watched you. I could just tell that it isn't just some stupid fling or a love potion, which is what I tried to convince Hermione it was when she first told me she suspected something. I never saw you happy like that before. And then I wasn't angry anymore."

Ron sighed and faced Harry looking him in the face for the first time since they came outside. "I hadn't decided what to do about it. If I should ask you or not. Hermione hadn't brought it up in a while and I didn't tell her what I figured out. But tonight I almost lost another brother to the war. Nobody knew he was that bad; he didn't tell anyone anything. He could have died because of that secret. I was standing there in the waiting room thinking, if you can't tell me about this, then what else would you keep from me?" He looked away quickly, struggling to form the right words. Harry could tell it was difficult for him. After all, it wasn't often the two of them sat around sharing their feelings. According to Hermione, Ron had the "emotional range of a teaspoon" and shouldn't be capable of even thinking things out this far.

Finally Ron took a deep breath, ready to get it over with. "I don't want to lose another brother, Harry."

Harry nodded. "No more secrets."

When Harry finally returned to the house Draco was curled up on the sofa asleep. Harry smiled at how peaceful he looked with an open book laying across his chest. He knelt down next to the blond head, just watching him breathe. Part of him wanted to put a blanket over him and leave him looking peaceful. Draco would never forgive him for that though. And he would be even more furious if Harry explained that his reason was that Draco just looked too cute.

"Draco?"

He twitched a little. His eyebrows pulled together as he frowned, not wanting to wake. His eyes finally fluttered open and he smiled up at Harry's face.

"I was having a dream."

"A good one?"

Draco smirked and nodded. Then he sobered. "Are your friends alright?"

"George will be fine physically, but he's mad at Ron for saving him. And Ron, well I imagine he's getting a beating from Hermione right now for what he said to his brother."

Draco sat up, making room for Harry next to him.

"And you? Are you okay?"

Harry sighed, realizing just how tired he was now that it was all over. "I am now. Now that I'm home with you."

Draco smiled, running a hand through his lover's hair. Harry leaned into the touch, desperately needing this comfort. The night had been too long and emotional and he wanted to surrender completely to Draco. As their lips met, Draco continued playing with Harry's dark locks. His other hand was on his neck, then his chest and then reached under his shirt. Harry let out a gasp when a hand grazed over his nipple and Draco finally broke the kiss.

"Let's go upstairs."

"Best offer I've had all day."

He let Draco take his hand and lead him up to his bedroom. He let him undress them both and let Draco take control of them. Somehow Draco knew that this was what Harry needed. He knew that he needed to feel wanted and taken care of. He had spent so much time recently worried about everyone else, that he needed to give over total trust and control to someone else. He allowed himself to touch and be touched and to forget the world.

Harry let Draco hold him in silence for a long time afterward. He wasn't particularly sleepy now and his mind kept going over the day and everything that had happened. He couldn't imagine how terrible it must have gotten for George to try to end it that way. He knew grief. The grief over Sirius was perhaps the most painful for him. He had destroyed half of Dumbledore's office in his pain. Now that he had seen so many people die he still couldn't say that it was any easier. He had been depressed and there were times when he wished he could give up. But he had never truly wanted to end his own life. He just couldn't wrap his mind around that kind of hopelessness. He couldn't begin to understand a time when suicide would seem like the best option.

He thought about all those people he loved, who he had been willing to die for. In retrospect, dying for them had been easy. He knew it had to be done and that he was the only one who could do it. As scared as he had been, he knew that he would choose no different. Could there ever be a scenario when living for them would actually be harder? Could he choose to stay alive for them when things got toughest or would he choose to die, as George had done?

Was it normal to think so in-depth about his own suicide? A little morbid, but probably normal after the night he just had. Or after the year he just had. He had faced more death than most people his age. He had faced his own death more than he cared to think about. At this point death didn't scare him so much anymore. He didn't want to die, but what was it Dumbledore had said? To the well organized mind, death is the next big adventure. After everything he'd been through, Harry really believed that. Maybe he just wanted to believe it. It made things easier to believe that Remus and Tonks weren't just rotting in a grave. Somewhere they were alive and happy and together. And they were watching their son grow just as Harry's parents had watched him. Was that true? That death wasn't the end, but merely passing from one life to the next?

If it was true, then suicide was all the more selfish. If a dead person only went on to the next life, then the only people negatively affected would be those left behind. Ron and Hermione and Draco… He couldn't imagine leaving them, but he had done it once already. But not Draco. Draco hadn't been in the equation then. And that made all the difference. This went beyond not being able to leave him. His whole chest constricted at the thought of not seeing him anymore and his eyes widened in realization of where his morbid thoughts had led him.

He felt a sudden sense of urgency for what he had to say and he wiggled around in Draco's arms so that they were facing each other. Draco had started to fall asleep. His eyelids were half open and his lips slightly parted. Harry placed a light kiss there to wake him.

"Hm?" he asked. His eyes were still shut, but at least Harry knew he was awake.

"I love you."

Harry watched, amused, as Draco struggled to make sense of this information in his sleepy mind. He blinked a few times and then opened his eyes fully, focusing on Harry.

"Repeat that."

"I love you."

Draco frowned. "Are you just saying that because you're freaked out about Weasley?"

"No. I'm saying it because being freaked out about George made me finally realize that it's the truth. I guess it's probably been the truth for a long time, we just never said it. Tonight I needed to say it."

"Oh," he replied softly. He wasn't really sure what gave Harry the sudden insight into his own feelings, but he wouldn't say something like that on a whim. And the feeling it gave him couldn't be put into words. It was somewhere beyond happiness or joy and he hadn't realized how much he had really wanted to hear it until now. "Well then in that case, I love you too, Harry."

Harry closed his eyes and settled back into Draco's arms, finally able to think about something other than death.