Vulpes took a shaky breath, watching Maria stand up before fumbling with the zipper on his pants. She smirked, looking pleased with herself. "I always wonder if I'm doing that right," she said.

"You're doing it right," he replied, still feeling somewhat out of breath. Vulpes suspected Maria knew that already, and just wanted a bit of flattery. How could she not know, after all, when she had been wiping his seed from her lips only moments earlier? "Uh…" he shook his head, trying to think again. "Um, while I'm certainly not objecting, is there any particular reason you decided to do that?"

She had taken him by surprise. They were cutting through the old workshop area when Maria turned and shoved Vulpes against the wall, kissing him before dropping to her knees.

She shrugged. "You looked like you were drowning in thoughts. Probably not the sort you want running around in there. I figured giving your brain a rest would help."

He was forced to admit it had helped. For a moment he had forgotten all about his childhood, his tribe, the Legion…everything. All he could focus on was her mouth, the eyes that kept looking up at him, and, after he made the mistake of pushing a bit too hard on the back of her head, the feeling of her hands pinning his wrists to the wall.

Of course, his mind was starting to clear again.

"Really? I thought you were preemptively bribing me not to kill your profligate friends."

She rocked back on her heels, smiling slightly. "Well… maybe a little of that, too."

"I'm not so cheaply bought," he said, and she looked worried. "But I think they may come in useful, so they are safe… for now." He didn't want her to run and tell them that, though. Not before he was sure of his plan. "But I warn you, there's only so much disrespect I can tolerate. I don't plan to sit and accept their abuse."

Maria snorted. "Didn't I once call you a brainwashed asshole in a skirt? You didn't kill me."

That was true, although he had been very tempted at the moment. "You saved my life. That earns… a lot of tolerance. They haven't done the same." Vulpes glanced over, making sure they couldn't be overheard. "And, at the time, Mars had made it clear to me on more than one occasion that you would be useful."

Her silence was as much of an answer as he had expected. "You tell Cato about that yet?" Maria asked him.

"No," he admitted. "I… haven't found the right moment." The conversation wasn't going to be easy. He suspected his brother would be less accepting than Maria. Cato would probably enjoy thinking he had gone insane, after all. "And I likely won't find the right moment in the foreseeable future, either, since I have no desire to tell your doctor friend or that drunkard woman."

"She's not drunk," Maria protested.

"Not right now," he said. "First bottle of whiskey we find is likely going straight down her throat before any of us are the wiser, though. Don't delude yourself." She looked hurt. If he had to guess, it was by the reality of the situation, not by his words.

"Don't push on my head like that again," was what she said after a long silence. The topic of her friend's remorseless alcoholism was apparently off the table.

"I'm sorry," he paused, hunting for a tactful way to finish the statement. Realizing it simply didn't exist. Vulpes said nothing more.

"You should be," she said, leaning against the wall. "You really want me gagging while I'm down there? Just after eating?"

She was smiling slightly, clearly not upset. Or not seriously upset, at any rate. "Probably not," Vulpes agreed.

"Probably?"

"Well, I'm sure I would enjoy it at first," he said, "but I probably wouldn't be able to explain why my pants were covered in vomit when we went back in. I can't decide if it would be worth it…" She hit his shoulder, expression briefly angry, and he laughed. "I'm joking, Maria. I shouldn't have done that. You wanted me not to think? Well, I wasn't thinking." She relaxed and chuckled, moving to head back inside.

Glancing at the door, Vulpes frowned again. He didn't particularly want to go back in.

"You really don't like my friends," she said. It wasn't a question.

"Can you really say that's surprising?" He was astonished she liked them.

"No," Maria agreed. "I don't think they like you, either," she said after a moment, sounding embarrassed.

"You don't say. I had no idea. I thought hate-filled glares and overt insults were how they normally greeted people. I had been sitting there amazed at how little I understood dissolute society even after more than a decade as a spy."

She looked uncomfortable and, he was pleased to note, slightly guilty. "Does it help that your brother doesn't seem very fond of me?"

Vulpes shrugged. "I think he's starting to come around."

"Yeah, right," she muttered. He did think Cato was starting to warm up to her, or at the very least, not wish for her to vanish by any means necessary. But he could understand why she didn't notice. Cato's definition of friendly didn't quite match up with the way anyone else used the word. That was the man, after all, who responded to being made second in command of the frumentarii by saying "Thanks. So, you need someone to do the work while you focus on how important you are?"

She had asked him to be patient, swearing her plan to get them back to New Vegas would work. I won't tell you they'll get better, she said, but they'll be gone soon.He must not have replied quickly enough, since she put a hand on each shoulder and, after biting her lip, asked in a pleading tone if he could please tolerate them for a little while, for her since she "never asked him for anything."

"That's very unfair," he had said, staring down at her. But in the end he had agreed none the less.

He did have a plan for them, after all. They wouldn't be of any use as corpses. For that matter, Maria likely wouldn't be particularly pleased, or inclined to remain with him, if he killed her friends. That would have been… unfortunate.

They left that evening as soon as night fell. The wagon had been left behind, it was far too conspicuous, but many of the items they had carried ended up being divvied up among the group. Cato had grumbled to find himself now carrying several books that belonged to Maria, but stopped when Vulpes narrowed his eyes.

It was a nice change from Maria questioning everything he asked. He had missed that.

That was the only nice change he had found so far.

He had thought, foolishly in hindsight, that having two more people would mean he could actually get a full night of rest once in a while. More people to share the watch would mean he didn't have to take one every night. That hope was quickly dashed.

"You're fucking with me, right?" Cassidy had said, actually laughing. "Shit, we keep watch to avoid you Legion assholes. You really think I'll trust you?" She wasn't subtle, and Vulpes responded in kind.

"Believe me, woman," he said, not bothering to hide his annoyance, "I would sooner fuck a deathclaw. The only risk then would be having my dick ripped off, not having it rot away from some profligate disease."

Maria gave him a pleading expression, but he hadn't actually planned on saying anything more. He was pleased to overhear her later that night, speaking with Cass, hissed whispers passed between their bedrolls.

"Well what did you fucking expect?"she had said. "It was insulting. Shit, it was insulting to me as much as him."

"You honestly expect me to trust him?"

"No, it's way better for you to imply that my boyfriend is going to rape you. He didn't lay a finger on me for months, never did a damn thing to make me feel unsafe, but hey, I guess I'm some scarred troll. It was easy for him to keep his dick in his pants then."

There was a long silence. "I didn't think of it that way."

"Guess not."

"I'm sorry."

"Fine,"Maria said, in a tone that made it clear she was anything but.

After a long pause Cass said "Did you really just call him your boyfriend?"

"Shut up."

"Jesus Christ, Maria," the woman was laughing now. "I don't think anyone alive's ever used the words boyfriend and legionary to describe the same person."

"I will hit you," came Maria's reply. He covered his mouth, stifling his laugh.

His first shared watch was with the doctor.

"So what, exactly, are your intentions?" Arcade said after he stopped fighting laughter from the overheard conversation. He chuckled with embarrassment after a moment. "I sound like an overprotective father, don't I?"

"You do," Vulpes agreed.

"I suppose someone needs to look out for her," he finally said.

"Maria is more than capable of looking out for herself," he replied tersely. "You both act as though she were a child, or a fool. She's neither."

Arcade rolled his eyes. "She acts without thinking, she has almost no control over her temper, she is almost terminally irresponsible—"

"Have you ever considered that irresponsible simply means she doesn't share your priorities?" When Arcade didn't reply, he laughed. "That's what you see, then?"

The doctor made a derisive sound. "And what do you see," he asked. "I really can't wait to hear this."

"I may disappoint you," Vulpes said. He didn't know what the man expected him to say, but he knew how the man planned to feel about it. "What do I see? Hm. Well, going back… what, three years now? Gods, four? I saw a woman who had somehow survived the grave, and was single-minded in her pursuit of justice, and, so you know I'm being honest, a woman dressed like the lowest profligate trash I had ever seen outside a chem den, which only made me all the more frustrated with Caesar's proclamation that no one was allowed to touch her."

"So that's it? You've been carrying around some crush—"

"Are you honestly implying I somehow lost a war, arranged for one of my closest friends to betray me, got shot in the head, and, while unconscious and bleeding, convinced someone who actually sided against me in said war to save my life… all because I'm willing to admit that I wanted to fuck the courier? There isn't woman alive with anything that special between their thighs." He remembered who he was speaking to. "I suppose you would need to take my word on that."

"I suppose so," the doctor agreed. "And… I will admit, you've made a good argument."

"The truth generally is," Vulpes said. "And believe this: if I had seen her at any point, from when she sided against my people, to when I was shot… I would have gladly liberated that pretty head from her body without much more than a passing thought about it being a waste of an attractive woman."

"Does she know this?"

"Of course she does," Vulpes said. "As I said, Maria isn't a fool. You speak as though that bullet reduced her to a little girl in need of protection. I find it rather curious that most of the major political leaders of the Mojave put more trust in her than she finds with her own friends. When I look at her, I see a woman who is capable, extremely well-read, loyal almost to a fault, useful with a weapon, gifted with languages in a way I didn't even think possible, and, I should point out, so skilled with a scalpel that she quite literally brought me back from the dead."

There, he thought. The entire conversation was offensive.

"When I met Maria," Arcade said slowly, "it took her more than ten minutes to tie her own shoes. She would occasionally stop talking halfway through a sentence and stare, because she literally forgot where she was and what she was doing. She could barely dress herself, much less feed herself without relying on pre-war boxed meals. The only things she seemed capable of doing without trouble were reading and shooting. Although she would forget everything she read almost as soon as the book was out of her hands."

"Then I suppose the strides she has made are all the more impressive," he said. "Since I promise, the only person who ties Maria's shoes now is Maria."

"And what will happen to her should your plans succeed and she's outlived her usefulness?"

"Don't worry, her death will be painless." He rolled his eyes. "Outlived her usefulness? Please, do you think I'm some sort of villain from an old comic book? Did you expect me to shove her from a cliff? Slit her throat?" There was no response. "She and I have given very little thought or discussion to what will happen after. In general, I find it a triumph to survive a single day as of late." He shrugged. "But I will say I have no intention of throwing her aside like a used rag. To be honest, I'm rather insulted by the implication. You don't know me. What gives you any right to make such assumptions?"

"I know enough," he replied.

"Is that so?" Vulpes shook his head. "I would think someone with such obvious Enclave ties would be less swayed by NCR propaganda."

He made a choking sound, face going even paler. "Maria tol—"

"You doknow I spent several years as a spy, don't you? Why would I need Maria to tell me that?" He was pleased to see fear on the doctor's face. Fear was good. "Do you honestly think most men your age spend much of their free time visiting the elderly? That pilot in Primm, the man in Westside, the one in Freeside… Well, they all had one commonality- retired Enclave."

"I take it the Legion doesn't care for the Enclave?" The words came slowly.

"Reinstating the exact government that brought us to the irradiated hell we currently inhabit, and nearly wiped our very species off the earth? Not just the same ideals, like the NCR, but a literal straight line continuation of the very same government? Now why would anyone dislike that idea? It's positively brilliant. They did such an excellent job, after all, the last time they were in power."

"Are we really going to discuss politics? Because, from where I'm sitting, I don't think the man who blindly follows a slaving despot that claims he was chosen by a god humanity abandoned thousands of years ago has much leg to stand on."

"You did ask my opinion," Vulpes replied, resisting the bait. "Would you like me to apologize for answering honestly?"

He was staring forward, lost in thought. "What… what will the Legion do to them?"

"Pardon?"

"Daisy, Judah… the others. Does the Legion plan to kill them?"

"Why would we?" he asked. "Beyond the fact that they already have one foot in the grave, they're far more useful alive. If they stay good and quiet we know the Enclave is dormant. When they start bustling, well… that's quite a different story."

The doctor had no answer to that, so, after a protracted silence, he picked up his book and clicked on the small battery-powered light Maria kept for reading at night. He had barely made it through a chapter before he could sense eyes on him. "What?" he said, not bothering to hide his annoyance. "If you would like a book there are others. Macbeth is particularly good, Maria has a copy in her pack. I would strongly recommend avoiding anything with the name Jane Austin on the cover, though."

"I was just wondering what you were reading."

Vulpes looked over. The question seemed sincere. The doctor, evidently, had decided he would prefer being friends to enemies… at least for now. Perhaps he was feeling inclined to friendship after Vulpes had disavowed plans to kill his elderly friends. "It is called Crime and Punishment," Vulpes told him. "Maria thinks she's being subtle by giving me books that… well, challenge my views."

"Does that bother you?"

"Not particularly," he admitted. "She said it was a book I would enjoy, and so far I will admit I am enjoying it. And frankly, if my views are built on such a poor foundation that a four hundred year old novel can sway them, perhaps they do need to be reexamined."

"Is she trying to change your feelings on whores?"

"That, or perhaps women in general," Vulpes said, realizing the man must have read the book. He had found it striking that one of the few characters with an ounce of moral backbone was, in fact, a prostitute. Not only that, but in the context of the book, her actual whoring was portrayed as a selfless act. "I certainly hope she isn't attempting to change my view on murderers."

"I assume it's currently against."

"Be grateful for that," he replied, laughing to see the horrified expression on the doctor's face.

"I miss when it was just us," Maria whispered to Vulpes one night. He gave her a strange look and she shrugged. "Not like how you think," she said. "I just mean I'm really sick of people bitching at each other and glaring. It's put me all on edge. I swear I almost shot my own pack the other day after listening to Cass and Cato argue for half an hour."

"I can understand that," he said after a moment. "Believe me, I am in complete agreement and sympathy. Especially considering the bulk of the glares and arguments have been directed at me."

Maria turned to him. "And speaking of you," she said, "what's with you lately?"

Vulpes, arm around her shoulder, pulled away to return her glance. "Can you be a little more specific?"

She shrugged his arm off. "Well, that for one thing. And did you honestly try to hold my hand earlier?" She tried to read his expression. He was fighting back a smile. "You did! Who are you?" Maria glanced closer. It wasn't a smile, it was a smirk. "You son of a bitch," she laughed.

"What?"

"Don't fucking what me. You're hanging all over me just to piss them off, aren't you?"

"Maria, I have no idea what you're talking about." Cass had glanced in their direction, probably wondering what they were whispering about. Vulpes put a hand on Maria's leg, letting his fingers drift towards her inner thigh, and the redhead's eyes narrowed in loathing before she turned away. His hand dropped back to his side as soon as they were unobserved and he laughed.

"You're acting like a child."

"I have very few amusements and joys in life," Vulpes countered. "And this seems far less likely to bother you than killing them would have been."

"Can you not use me as a prop, please?"

"Can I kill them?"

"No!"

"Well, it seems we have reached an impasse."

Maria couldn't resist laughing at his sincere expression, despite her annoyance. "What do I see in you?"

"I would assume the attraction is grounded in our shared contempt for the majority of society. That, and I believe you once mentioned something about my legs."

"Yeah, that's probably it," she agreed.

Maria stared across the cave they had used as a camp. Cato was sitting by himself, holding a book and staring into space. Arcade was reading through one of Maria's medical books near the light of a crack in the ceiling, looking more nervous than usual. Cass… well, Cass had managed to find a bottle of whiskey. Not long after she caught Vulpes groping Maria's leg she had fallen asleep. "You're nervous," Vulpes said.

"No," Maria lied. She reached up, scratching her hair beneath the hood. She had braided it tightly, wrapping the braid around the back of her head to hide it. "How did you ever wear this thing?" she asked, straightening the dog-head that was balanced on her own. "It itches. And it smells."

"It's been sitting in the bottom of my pack for more than a year," Vulpes said. "Under my dirty socks, no doubt. I'm not surprised it smells. Be glad. If you stink, people won't get close enough to notice you aren't what you seem." She wouldn't argue. Even with a strip of cloth binding her chest as flat as it would go, and another padding out her waist, it would be difficult for anyone to confuse her for a man once they got close. The bandanna around her neck to hide the lack of adam's apple would only go so far. And if she had to speak, well, that would be the end of the disguise.

"Great," she muttered. "Why am I doing this again?"

"Because you're tall enough and slim enough to pass as a man when you're in armor, and because I would be recognized in a heartbeat," he said. When she didn't reply, Vulpes turned, looking her in the eye. "You don't have to do this."

"I know," Maria said. "I told Cato I would, though." She shrugged. "It's the right thing to do." She glanced over at the cave entrance. "I suppose it's about time to go."

Vulpes nodded. Rising to his feet, he glanced around. Arcade, noticing them, shook Cass with one hand. She sat up quickly, looking guilty as she shoved the bottle behind her back.

"Cato?" Maria called. He dropped his book.

"Yeah," he climbed to his feet, smoothing out his tunic below his armor. "Ready."

Arcade actually smiled. When he had learned why Vulpes was keen on them staying for a little while, he had been offended at first. Until Maria explained to him, late one night, exactly why he wanted a doctor around. His mood had changed relatively quickly. You're saving a child from a horrible fate, he had said, looking, of all things, proud. Maria hadn't expected Arcade to ever look at her like that again, it was a nice feeling. "Good luck," he said.

"We'll need it," Cato replied flatly.

"We meet at the Fort," Vulpes said to her. "If you aren't there in two weeks, I'll come looking."

"Two weeks," she replied, nodding before throwing her arms around him. Ignoring the grumbles from Cass and Cato, Maria kissed Vulpes, holding tightly to him. He responded, but released her first, looking slightly embarrassed. It was one thing to jokingly paw at her, it was quite another to actually express any intimate feelings in front of the others.

"All right," she said, touching both hips to ensure weapons were at the ready. "Let's go get us a pregnant lady."

Thanks so much to my readers and reviewers! I'll manage to reply to everyone tonight and tomorrow. The full title is One for My Baby (And One More for the Road) and it's from the musical "The Sky's the Limit."