Part XXVI: Unexpressed Emotions

"Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways."
— Sigmund Freud

….

Ulquiorra sat with his legs folded beneath him. His hands resting in his lap, his fingers curled as if in a purposeful stretch. He was completely motionless; breathless, lifeless. He finally stirred, his eyes opening. He inhaled the stagnant stench in the air and wrinkled his nose in involuntary response.

When he moved, his joints clicked noisily from disuse. The interrupted blood flow to his extremities made him unusually stiff and disjointed. His tendons popped loudly, his cartilage grinding against bone as he climbed to his feet.

He reached down, lifting the bit of rotted wood and tossing it to the side. It hit the wall of the shack and clattered against the wood before falling to the dirt-covered floor. Ulquiorra dropped slowly to his knees. He placed his hands on the ground, feeling the earth between his fingers. He waited impatiently, his hands caressing the grave beneath him. And then he heard it, felt it; a heartbeat. He dug quickly, dirt lodging beneath his too-short fingernails.

Dirt was launched over his shoulder as he excavated the space in front of him. He clicked his tongue, a staccato breath escaping his lips as his pale hand touched another. He held the muddied hand in his for the briefest of moments before continuing to clear away the earth. He grabbed a fistful of hair, the coppery fibers snagging between his fingers. He murmured to himself, shoveling handfuls of dirt away from the shifter's head. He cleared away the earth blocking Ichigo's face. He lifted his shifter's head, brushing clumps of soil from his matted black lashes. "There you are."

"Time to wake up." Ulquiorra said softly, clearing the heavy earth from Ichigo's shoulders. He pulled on Ichigo, gradually yanking him free of the roots and dirt. He laid the shifter on the ground beside the disturbed grave and looked him over. "Wake up."

Ulquiorra clapped his hand against Ichigo's soot-covered cheek. Ichigo lay motionless; no sign of life. Ulquiorra clicked his tongue again, his jaw tightening. He thought for a moment before pushing his fingers inside of Ichigo's mouth. He cleared his mouth of soil, scraping toward the sides of his gums and edge of his throat.

Ichigo's heart beat sharply in his chest. Ba-dum.

"It's time." Ulquiorra said, smacking Ichigo's cheek again sharply. Ba-dum.

Ulquiorra held his breath. He watched Ichigo with great interest, watching for any sign of revival. Ulquiorra could hardly contain his anxiety. He chewed on his nails rudely, spitting the torn shards of nail onto the ground beside him. "Wake up."

Ba-dum.

"Yes." Ulquiorra breathed out, nodding his head. "Time to wake up."

Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum. Ba-dum, Ichigo's heart beat rapidly.

Ichigo's eyes opened first, the sclera of his eyes startling in contrast to his mud covered skin. His brown eyes met Ulquiorra's and his jaw dropped open. Eyes wide, and mouth hanging loosely, he let out a terrible, feral scream. His scream ripped from his throat violently, mud dripping from his lips and down his chin.

Ulquiorra sat in stunned silence for several petrified seconds. He reached out, placing his hand on Ichigo's chest. "Calm."

Ichigo sat up, sending dirt everywhere. Creepy crawlies squirmed and wriggled, escaping his sudden movement. Ichigo couldn't stop screaming, his hands curled into fists, squeezing mud out from between his fingers. The bugs were everywhere, they ran for their lives, oozing and crawling toward Ulquiorra in mass. It seemed as if the entire hole was constructed of millions of insects.

"Fuck!" Ulquiorra gasped, standing up. He made a face, shaking his head from side to side. His hands made an involuntary flapping movement and he hopped from foot to foot in disgust.

Ichigo rolled forward, then backward, rocking his body until he was on his feet. A millipede slid across his face, scurrying down his neck and across his shoulder. His scream ended abruptly. He stood there, watching Ulquiorra.

Ulquiorra straightened up, returning Ichigo's gaze with a sharp glare. "The contract is over."

Ichigo was silent.

"It's time for me to collect." Ulquiorra continued.

…..

"Hyorin-" Komamura stumbled over his mistake. "Ah, I mean, Hitsugaya…"

The small young man paused, turning slightly to watch Komamura. "Yes?"

"There's a situation." Komamura breathed out nervously, his hands fidgeting in front of him.

"Is it Jaegerjaquez again?" Toshiro asked dryly, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Just tell the guards to let him go wherever he wants. There's no stopping him…"

"No. It's not him." Komamura clarified, shaking his head.

Toshiro frowned, "Well? What is it then?"

"It's the Dragon."

Toshiro looked toward Yamamoto before looking back to Komamura. He closed the distance between them, the top of his shoulder pressing into Komamura's side. "Let's take a walk."

"Of course." Komamura agreed, watching the shifters as they walked past.

"Anything wrong?" Unohana asked, her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Personal business." Toshiro answered briskly, not even sparing the shifters a glance. Toshiro made a face once out of view. "They're becoming unbearable."

Komamura nodded in agreement. "If the Creator didn't ask me not to, I probably would've killed them a hundred years ago."

Toshiro smiled, a surprised chuckle escaping his lips. "Really? That isn't like you…"

"I like humans." Komamura explained. "They're not humans. They're Masters without the wisdom of experience."

Once he was sure they were alone, Toshiro pressed Komamura for information. "Now what about the Dragon?"

"He sent for you." Komamura answered, licking his lips.

"What? When?" Toshiro demanded in shock. "How did he get ahold of you?"

"Just a few moments ago," Komamura replied. "I was with the Creator and suddenly I was in Xibalba."

"Why didn't he just summon me himself?" Toshiro asked, irked.

"You're probably too strong, sir." Komamura breathed out. "It's nothing to transport someone like me."

"Well?" Toshiro snipped impatiently. "What did he want?"

"He wants to see you."

Toshiro made another face. "What about?"

"Hyorinmaru," Komamura sighed. "If Nozarashi is calling you… Then it must be very important."

Toshiro nodded reluctantly. "Of course." He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. "I'll go right away."

"Do you want me to go with you?" Komamura offered.

Toshiro's turquoise eyes softened. He smiled indulgently, placing his hand on Komamura's arm. "Thank you, but I can handle him myself."

…

The Master sighed dreamily, covering his face with a slender, pale arm. The sun was pleasantly warm and the breeze was salty. He opened his eyes as the body beside him stirred. He eyed the shifter with a single blue eye. "Where're you goin'?"

"Fuck," Grimmjow drawled, stretching his arms high above his head, his voice devoid of heat. He smiled handsomely and let out a soft chuckle. "I was planning on escaping while you napped."

"I wasn't asleep." Kira replied, making a sour face. He rolled over, his beautiful, bare flesh catching Grimmjow's eye. Grimmjow ran a hand over Kira's side, starting from the shoulder and down to well below his thigh. "Well, where were you going?"

"For a swim." Grimmjow said simply, hitching his thumb toward the ocean.

"Okaaay…" Kira drawled, unconvinced.

"This is a mirage, a hallucination… Where the hell would I go?" Grimmjow barked, shaking his head.

Kira shrugged, smoothing down his blonder hair with his slender hands. "I'm afraid you'll run off and those big, bad monsters will show up."

"I wouldn't do that to you." Grimmjow vowed.

Kira considered Grimmjow's answer for a moment before nodding, "No. You wouldn't."

"I'm an asshole. But I'm a cute, fun asshole." Grimmjow declared.

"Oh?" Kira mused, his hair falling over one eye. "Do you re-"

The image of the beach pixelated. The sun flickered. The sand disappeared and then reappeared a moment later. Kira sat up, his hand shooting to his mouth. He looked as if he might be sick. Grimmjow leaned over Kira in concern. And then it hit him. A powerful, terrible jolt of energy.

"A Master." Grimmjow choked out, his fingers digging into the sand beneath him.

"Shit." Kira groaned, his brows furrowed. "Let me out of here…" The beach disappeared. The bright sun became a sky of stars and a sliver of moon. The warm sand morphed into soft, thick grass. The breeze died leaving behind a dry chill. "They're too close for comfort."

"It's so strong." Grimmjow breathed out, barely able to push himself to his feet.

"It should subside in a moment." Kira explained, crawling to his feet. He waved his hand, summoning a long pipe. He puffed on it anxiously, his blue eyes closing. "They're just bleeding dark matter."

"A friend of yours?" Grimmjow questioned, holding his stomach cautiously.

"No." Kira answered flatly. "No friend of mine." Kira shrugged, smiling as an idea came to him. "Oh well. It's not our problem. I do wonder what the Council is doing right now…"

"Probably jizzing in their pants." Grimmjow snarled. "I hope they all die."

"Such a terrible thought." Kira chastised half-heartedly. "Forgiveness goes a long way."

"I'd fucking do it myself if they didn't have that little ice goblin fighting all their battles for them." Grimmjow challenged, his lips pulling back over bared teeth. "Cowards."

"Little Ice Goblin…" Kira repeated the insult before erupting into a fit of hysterics. "Oh, sweet, Creator. I can't wait to tell him you said that…"

There was another stream of nauseating energy. Kira and Grimmjow exchanged looks. And then Grimmjow felt it, a gentle tug in his belly. It started as a flutter and then it became a full blown compulsion. He took a confused step forward, and then another, until he was nearly jogging.

"What is it?" Kira called out, his pipe smoking in his hand.

"I don't know…" But suddenly Grimmjow did know. He knew that feeling. He knew that craving force that urged him onward. "No way…" Grimmjow murmured, his entire body tingling with anticipation. "It's him."

"I'll be seeing you then." Kira called out, giving a small wave.

Grimmjow turned, watching Kira saunter down the lane. He gave a little hop-skip and kicked absently at a rock, smoke curling around him like a blanket. "See ya when I see ya."

"Do you think…?" Grimmjow called out, swallowing the lump in his throat. Kira paused, arching his head back to hear the rest of Grimmjow's question. "Do you think it's really him?"

Kira smiled handsomely, "I've never met the fellow. I wouldn't know… buuuuut…" Kira drawled. "You think it's him. And I don't reckon you're wrong."

…..

"You wanted to see me?" Toshiro asked, his slender arms crossed over his narrow chest.

"You finally made it…" the deep voice rumbled, shaking the cavern.

Toshiro sighed, brushing his hand through his white hair. "Quit with the theatrics. I'm here. Why did you summon me?"

"I have something to show you." The lake in front of Toshiro rippled, the tide washing unexpectedly over Toshiro's boots.

"Just tell me." Toshiro groaned impatiently. "I don't have time to play games." The cavern shook violently. Rocks slid down the walls, crashing dangerously into the lake and littering the shore. There was a monstrous laugh, like from deep in the belly. Smoke filled the air, choking out the oxygen and blinding Toshiro's view. "What? What's so funny?"

"You are."

Toshiro's face screwed up in frustration. "How so?"

"Do you think that I wanted you to come here?" The Dragon breathed, flames flicking from inside its enormous snout. "I have no idea why you were summoned either."

"Aren't you the one who summoned me?" Toshiro snapped.

The cavern trembled threateningly, "Ya know, you're really pissin' me off, Hyorinmaru…"

"Yabbe, yabbe." Katen groaned, jumping down from his unseen perch on the rock ledge.

"O-oh, Ka-ten…" Toshiro breathed out, shock wiping his face expressionless. "It's you."

"You two shouldn't fight." Katen drawled, smiling handsomely. "You're friends."

"It's really you…" Toshiro murmured in disbelief, he reached out touching his fingers against Katen's skin as if he were precious.

"Not quite." Katen replied with an apologetic shrug.

"It's not his soul." The Dragon explained. "It's just dark matter."

Toshiro looked Katen up and down. He looked so real; flesh and bone. He wanted to touch Katen's hair, to tuck that wily curl behind his ear, but knowing it was just an image, and not the person, he withheld. "Why are you here?" Toshiro asked, addressing Katen.

"I need a favor."

Toshiro let out an involuntary snort. The Dragon laughed loudly, appearing in his human form beside Katen. His green eyes closed with laughter, his hand touching his muscled stomach in support. "Yeah, I know. I had the same reaction."

"You have a favor to ask?" Toshiro clarified, his turquoise eyes wide and disbelieving.

"Yes." Katen answered simply before flashing an apologetic smile.

"And what sort of favor would you need me to help with?" Toshiro asked, looking from Katen to Nozarashi unsurely.

"I need both of you." Katen explained. "You'll have to work together."

"Oh, this's gonna be good..." Nozarashi mumbled, rolling his neck from side to side with a loud crack-crack!

"I'm not asking as Katen." Katen said suddenly.

The smile slipped from Nozarashi's face and his gaze met Toshiro's. "What do you mean?" Toshiro asked.

Katen smiled. He licked his lips and let out a little sigh. "I'll explain everything."

….

"Am I going to die now?" Ichigo asked, his breathing slowly returning to normal.

Ulquiorra nodded, his chalky, white hands stroking Ichigo's face softly. "Yes."

"Okay." Ichigo breathed out, his eyes closing.

"Are you scared?" Ulquiorra murmured, his fingertips brushing calming circles into Ichigo's cheeks.

Ichigo swallowed, "Yes."

"Don't be." Ulquiorra spoke almost kindly. He pressed his fingers into Ichigo's temples. "It's just like falling asleep."

"What if…" Ichigo breathed out, "I don't want to die?"

Ulquiorra's green eyes narrowed. He watched Ichigo wordlessly for a moment before responding. "It's too late for that."

"Just take it." Ichigo insisted, his muddied hand clutching at his chest.

Ulquiorra's face twitched. He looked as if he was carefully considering his response. Finally, he shook his head, his fingers pinching Ichigo's earlobe softly. "I'm going to take all of it."

"No." Ichigo refused, banging his hand against his chest. "Just take what's yours and leave me alone…"

"That'll kill you too." Ulquiorra explained. "And then neither of us gets anything."

"I'll give it back…" Ichigo bargained. He clawed at his flesh, tearing the skin with his dirt-caked fingernails. "You can have it."

"You can't live without a heart." Ulquiorra whispered.

"Then… then just give mine back… I'll give you yours and…" Ichigo panicked.

"I took your heart long ago, swallowed it up, and ate it whole…" Ulquiorra replied, his deep voice bouncing over his words melodiously.

Ichigo shook his head, his brown eyes wide with madness. "No."

"Calm." Ulquiorra commanded. He pressed his palms against the sides of Ichigo's face and squeezed firmly. "It'll hurt but it'll be over quick."

Ichigo blinked, two fat tears rolling down his dust-covered cheeks. His eyes were wide and chaotic, wounded. He felt a lump grow in his throat, but he couldn't swallow it down. "I've lived through so much… and now… just like this…"

"You didn't live through anything." Ulquiorra responded. His eyes glowed in the darkness, illuminating his white face like a demon. "I did."