My Girl Chapter 26: Do You See What I See?, a ncis fanfic

You're either going to really love me, or really hate me for this chapter. I have to say that, hands down, this was my FAVOURITE chapter to have written, and I think it might end up being my favourite of the entire story. The lyrics used are One Republic – Stop and Stare – I highly recommend listening to the song during the last section…this song actually inspired a lot of the story, to be honest.

Chapter Twenty Six: Do You See What I See?

The following night, Tony and Penny were in his bedroom together, getting ready for the agency party. Tony was already wearing his tuxedo and was brushing Penny's hair for her as she stood before his mirror on a chair. She was wearing it down for the party, so he didn't have to worry about fiddling with hairstyles that he couldn't do. She had chosen a blue dress that was covered in glitter to wear.

"Are we going to go to the party soon?" she asked impatiently.

"When we're all ready," he told her. "Then we'll go pick up Auntie Abby and Uncle Tim."

"Not Ziva?" she asked.

"No, Ziva's going to see us when we get there."

"Why isn't she coming with us?" she asked dejectedly.

"Because she had to get ready at her house tonight."

"Why?"

"So then no one gets to see her pretty dress and it'll be a surprise," Tony explained.

"Have you seen it?" Penny asked him.

"No," he shook his head.

"How do you know it's pretty then?" she challenged him.

He smirked. "Because Ziva always looks pretty in her dresses."

"She looks like a princess."

Tony looked Penny's reflection sadly, remembering how beautiful Ziva had looked when she had left to go on her date with Adam. "Yeah, she does."

"Is Ziva going to have Christmas with us?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said honestly

"Can we ask her?"

"We can, but she doesn't celebrate Christmas like we do," he explained.

"Why?"

"Because Ziva's Jewish," he told her simply. "She has her own traditions that are different to ours."

"What's a 'radishun?" she repeated.

"It's something you do at special times," he explained. "Ziva does different things at this time of year."

"Has she always done different things for Christmas?" she asked.

"Yeah, since she was a little girl."

"What does she do?"

"She..." he stopped, realising that he didn't actually know what Ziva did over the holidays. "You know what, maybe you should ask her," he suggested. "She'd like that. She'd be able to tell you lots of stories about it."

"Can I ask her tonight?" she asked.

"Not tonight," he said. "It's a party tonight. People will be dancing."

"Will you and Ziva be dancing?"

"Yeah."

"Together."

"Maybe," he nodded. "I don't know."

"You gotta ask her," Penny insisted. "Or someone else will."

"Okay, I'll ask her," he half laughed. He stopped, when he realised that there was a thoughtful, yet sad expression on Penny's face. "What's wrong?" he asked her.

"Can Santa bring Mommy back for Christmas?" Penny asked.

Tony was saddened instantly, remembering years when all he'd wanted from Santa was his mother to come back. "No, Penny, he can't," he told her quietly.

"But you said Santa can bring me anything I want," she told him.

He remembered making that argument as well. He took Penny in his arms, sitting on the bed with her in his lap. "Penny, Santa can't bring your mother back. She has to stay in heaven now," he told her.

"Not just for Christmas? She likes Christmas."

Every time she said 'Christmas' it sounded like 'kismas'. "I know she does, but Santa doesn't work like that. Neither does heaven."

"Do they have Christmas in heaven?" she asked him.

"Yeah," he assured her. "They have a lovely big Christmas will all the angels."

"What does Mommy do in heaven?"

Tony smoothed down a stubborn wave in her hair. "She watches over you and makes sure that you're okay?"

Penny looked out of the window, revealing a cloudless winter sky. "Is she watching now?"

"Of course she is," he told her. "Our angels watch us all the time."

"How do you know that?" she asked him.

"Because I'm your Dad, and I know everything," he told her. She giggled. "Come on, we don't want to be late for the party."

They arrived at The Hilton in good time, but as they were walking in Tony took Penny to one side and crouched before her. "Right, you little rascal, listen to me. I can't tell you to behave tonight because I know you're going to forget I've told you that. I want you to stay by me tonight. Or Gibbs, or Ziva, Jenny, Abby or Tim. Tell me or Ziva who you're with, okay?"

Penny nodded, and they entered the main dinner hall where the party was taking place. Penny's eyes immediately lit up. She'd never seen anywhere like this, and her eyes found the glitter ball on the ceiling. "I like that ball, it's shiny," she told Tony.

"It's a glitter ball," he told her.

"I've got glitter on my dress."

"Yeah, you have."

She continued looking at the glitter ball. "Can I get one of those?" she asked.

He laughed. "We'll see, Princess." At that moment, he thought he saw someone, and did a double take. When he looked back, Jenny and Gibbs were standing before him, looking rather...close. He chose not to mention it. "Is that Agent Sacks?" he asked.

"Yes," Jenny said.

"He's FBI. What's he doing here?"

"I've invited some of our more co-operative associates," she told him. "I see it as a chance to bond with some of our sister companies,"

"Bond?" Tony smirked.

"Pun not intended," she told him.

"But we don't do bonding," Tony argued.

"Just enough to be civilised, DiNozzo," Gibbs told him.

"In the spirit of Christmas," Jenny added.

"We hate each other," Tony reminded them. "Why should we bond?"

"We all serve the same country, Tony."

"We have bodies in autopsy that aren't as cold as some of these guys," Tony told them. "I mean, honestly, I...I...I..."

He stopped, rendered speechless at the sight which had captivated his attention. He stood facing towards the stairs that marked the entrance, looking past Gibbs and Jenny to see the radiant image beyond them. Making her way down the steps was Ziva, as he had never seen her before. What Penny said about her looking like a Princess just didn't seem to compare anymore. He remembered her standing in his living room, dressed to go out with Adam, his heart and his body wanting nothing more than for her to stay with him wearing that green dress she'd worn but now…God, if having to watch her leave with Adam had been what it took to see her descending the staircase ahead of him right at that moment, looking as she was, he'd have gone back in time and done it again.

Since the shopping trip the previous day, Abby hadn't stopped making reference to Ziva's choice of dress. Perfect had been the word that was mentioned the most. She also insisted that Ziva would have many men drooling over her, and if that was the case Tony was ready and willing to knock them all to the ground. He had to admit, Abby had been right. The dress was a deep red, not to low at the front, but enough to show enough flesh above her chest to captivate the eyes of every man in the room. Not indecent, just flattering; more than flattering, actually. This was so much better than the simple green dress she'd worn for Adam; this dress had diamante patterns on the bodice, patterns that sparkled as they caught the light cast from the glitter ball. She'd not just pulled this dress from her closet - she'd looked for this dress for hours, and chosen it for a reason - the reason being that she looked absolutely stunning in it. It clung to her upper body, hugging itself to her hips even though it was loose and flowing satin around her legs.

One of the attendants took her shrug from her, and as she turned to hand it to them he saw that the back of her dress was non-existent. The fabric missed her back, showing a large amount of skin that he just wanted to touch, to taste, but he knew he couldn't. She'd worn her hair up, though, like she'd done for Adam. He loved it down. There was something compelling about the way her curls brushed against her back. It reminded him of being under cover - beautiful curls hanging loose as nature had intended. After they'd sat through a dinner undercover, which had been broadcast in MTAC, they'd been ordered to retain their cover back in their hotel room - something he'd been afraid of at first glance - but once they'd gotten back up to their hotel room he'd changed his mind. She'd caught him looking at her strangely, having changed into a nightgown but still with her hair tightly held in grips, and how amused she'd been when he silently stepped up close to her and removed the hair pins, allowing her hair to hang around her shoulders and simply announcing 'that's better' afterwards. Maybe he'd have to do that tonight…

"DiNozzo," Gibbs warned, interrupting his thoughts.

"Yes, boss?" he asked breathlessly, not taking his eyes off of Ziva.

"Close your mouth, that's your partner."

Recovering himself, Tony straightened himself up. "Yes, boss," he repeated.

Penny ran from his side, dropping the hand she had been holding, and went straight to Ziva. They met at the bottom of the staircase, and Penny hugged her legs. Part of Tony wanted to call out and stop her, in case she ruined the dress in anyway, but Ziva didn't seem to be thinking that way. Instead, Ziva bent down and placed her arms around Penny, allowing the small girl to kiss her on the cheek and then returning the favour even though she'd clearly spent the afternoon perfecting her appearance. This always surprised Tony. It didn't matter how long Ziva would spend making something perfect, she'd never deny Penny the chance to look in or help her; even if it meant that perfection being compromised.

Seeing Ziva pay that much attention to his daughter stirred something inside of him. He didn't know what it was, but it gave him the urge to do something drastic to make Ziva live with him and Penny (maybe burn her house down and offer her a place to stay?). He loved seeing them spend time together. He liked watching someone making his daughter happy. Even more so, he liked watching someone making Ziva smile. The most important people in his life; Ziva and Penny. Knowing that they brought smiles to each others faces made him feel warm and fuzzy inside, even though months ago he'd have denied that. He just didn't know what feeling that was.

And why did it feel stronger when Ziva was smiling at him?

By the time Penny had successfully dragged Ziva by the hand to his side, Jenny and Gibbs had moved on to greet other guests. "Daddy, look! Ziva's here!" she told him brightly.

"Yeah, she is…" he said, now that she was less than three feet in front of him. He smiled at her, running his eyes the length of her body and back again. "Ziva…you look…wow…just…wow," he decided, stammering as he couldn't keep his eyes from her.

"You are speechless," she realised.

"I ...you just look...wow."

"You have already said that," she pointed out.

"I don't know what else to say," he admitted, looking her in the eye now that he had drunk in every inch of the dress. "Ziva, you look...you look beautiful."

She smiled, looking around them. "Thank you. Although, I believe I may have dressed too much for the occasion."

"You look perfect," he assured her." There's not a man in the room who's not checking you out right now," he glowered at the leering men. "Unfortunately."

Admiring his tux, Ziva removed a brush of glitter that had rubbed off from Penny's dress. "You do not look to scruffy yourself, Mr. Bond."

Penny grinned up at them. "Now you really gotta dance with her, Daddy."

Not taking his eyes away from Ziva, he nodded. "Yeah, I think I'll have to."

Out on the dance floor, Abby and McGee held each other close. "You know," Abby commented. "You should wear a tux like this more often. It suits you."

"Are you kidding me? I look like a lounge singer in this thing," he groaned.

"I'm serious," she said, nudging his shoulder. "You look really…"

"Hot?"

"Handsome," she corrected.

"I guess I can live with that," he smiled, leaning to kiss her gently, but not before making sure Gibbs wasn't watching.

"You know," Abby started again. "When we do stuff like this it makes me glad we're making a go of this for real."

"You were having doubts?" he asked.

"No, of course not," she told him quickly. "I love you, remember? It's just that scare was well...scary," she remembered.

"You're okay though," he pointed out, rubbing his hand across her growing stomach. "Both of you are."

Doubt filled her voice. "You really think we can do this?"

"I thought you weren't having doubts?" he questioned.

"I'm not, I just...do you?" she asked him.

"Yeah," he said, and then again with more confidence. "Yeah, I do."

"Wow. I don't think I've ever heard you sound so sure before," she commented.

"It helped me to think what it would be like to have a baby with you," he revealed. "Knowing what it would be like to see you glowing."

She smiled. "What do you think it would be like...having a baby together?"

"We'll find out soon," he reminded her.

"I know, but what did you imagine it would be like?"

"I thought it would be amazing," he told her. "When you have the baby, I'll be in the delivery room with you, and when you start screaming at me to rot in Hell, I will." She laughed at him, but he carried on. "We'll raise our baby with values that are important to us, like respect for other people's opinions and doing what's right even if it isn't easy. When they go on their first date we'll be sitting at home, nervous and waiting but acting like we aren't...and then one day they'll go off to college, and we'll look at each other and think...'you know what? We did a good job'."

She smiled at him, shaking her head. "God, McGee...no wonder you're a bestseller."

Tony approached Ziva, noticing that she was standing talking to James from accounting, which had made him grumble from afar. Because of this, Abby and McGee had temporarily kidnapped Penny and were holding her hostage until Tony got his act together and asked his partner to dance. So, he crossed the room to where she was standing with James. "Hey," he smiled at her. "Can I borrow you for a second?"

"Of course," she said eagerly, her eyes screaming 'save me'.

James got the hint, and smiled at Ziva. "Enjoy your night, Ziva, you look really nice tonight."

He left, and Ziva is amused by the glare that Tony directs at the man's back. "Why are you staring at him like that?" she asked.

"He said you looked nice," he spat.

"Women like to be told that."

"'Nice' is practically an insult, Ziva," he told her. "The way you look tonight...just...so much more than beautiful..."

"Thank you," she smiled.

"Well, uh..." he said, catching himself. "The real reason I stole you away from the Accounting Demon is to uh...ask you if you wanted to dance."

"I would love to," she smiled.

Ziva took his hand and allowed herself to be lead to the dance floor. They passed Abby and McGee on the way, and McGee's jaw dropped - he hadn't thought Tony would actually go through with it. "Problem, Probie?" Tony asked.

"You're actually going to dance with Ziva?"

Tony looked at Ziva, but the comment was directed at McGee. "The word you're looking for is 'wow', and the word I'm looking for is 'in your face'."

The music began, almost on cue, as he lead her to the centre of the dance floor. Not many people were dancing now that the large buffet on one side of the reception hall had been open, which pleased him just fine. He wanted to dance with Ziva, and he didn't want the rest of NCIS teasing the two of them about the same 'denied feelings' that McGee wrote about in his novels. He didn't know what was worse, working with the teasing for the next three years, or Gibbs giving them a lecture on rule twelve. He never gaze never strayed to the people that may or may not be watching them. He had more important things on his mind. He took her in his arms, one hand on her hip with the other holding hers. She smiled, placing her free hand on his shoulder; the space between them more than obvious, and both had an aching to fill it, but they held back.

This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shaking off the rust.
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years.

"Why have we never danced together before?" Tony asked aloud, as they swayed to the music. He found it strange, with the amount of under cover scenarios they'd participated in, they'd never danced together. He'd watched her dance under cover, when she'd had to dance with their suspect, but he'd never danced with her…something that had proved to be a greatly missed opportunity.

"You have never asked before," she pointed out.

"I asked tonight."

"So you did," she nodded, "and here we are dancing."

Tony gave her a mocking grin. "Christmas came early this year."

"Then I shall return your gift," she threatened lightly.

"You got me a gift?"

"You got me one," she replied.

"How did you know?"

"Penny told me."

"Of course," he said, rolling his eyes.

Steady hands just take the wheel
Every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal
For the life I lead

The chorus of the song kicked in, and Tony seemed to be waiting for it. He'd heard this song before on the radio, but never paid attention to the words, not as much as he was now. Mind you, he was dancing with Ziva, he wanted to remember this song. He wanted to remember the words. He wanted to remember every second of how she felt in his arms because he didn't know how long it would be before he got an opportunity like this again. As the tune of the song became more powerful, he put more feeling into his steps; steps that he hadn't used for a long time now, but ones his feet still know. Ziva followed his lead, allowing him to move her across the dance floor in any way he wanted, listening to the words of the song as much as he did.

Stop and stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be.
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need.
Oh, can you see what I see?

The slower tune returned to the song, and to match, their movements also slowed. However, after a graceful turn, Ziva ended up being pulled close in to Tony, through no intention of their own. The gap between them was now gone, as she ended up pressed firmly against him in all ways. Tony groaned uncomfortably. "Ziva…" he murmured, his face wrought with control.

"Is something wrong?" she asked.

"Do I need to remind you how long I've been without a date?" he half-laughed.

Teasingly, she grinned. "Am I tempting you, Tony?"

"You're teasing me, that's what you're doing," he corrected her.

"And how is that?" she asked.

They're trying to come back, all my senses push
Untie the weight bags, I never thought I could
Steady feet don't fail me now
I'm gonna run 'til you can't walk
Something pulls my focus out
And I'm staring down

He placed his hand on her upper back, wishing that he felt her hair spilling over his fingers, but instead there was nothing but air. "The last woman I held like this, I had no intention of letting go of for the rest of the night," he told her with a smirk. However, he leaned in closer, whispering directly into her ear; "and right now, I feel like I couldn't let you go either."

Ziva was about to answer, but before the words could leave her lips she found herself spinning as he moved quicker with the music again.

During the instrumental part of the song they danced expertly, as if they'd danced the steps together a million times before. However, the music soon calmed again, and they stood in the middle of the dance floor, their eyes connected. The moment they had stilled, Tony gave in to temptation. He reached up, finding the singular clip that held her hair in place and he gently removed it from her hair. Immediately, her curls tumbled down her back, brushing against his skin and hers, and in their proximity he heard her sigh when he did this.

What you need, what you need, what you need...

People were watching them now, that much was obvious, but they didn't care as they stood motionless in the centre of the floor. Tony leaned forward, placing his hands in her curls. Ever since they'd been under cover together he'd been wishing for this moment, the moment where he could dive his hands into her luxurious hair, feeling its softness between his fingers and knowing that she knew it was him that was doing it. Not Jean Paul Ranier. This wasn't a fake husband. This was Tony, and only Tony, and there was nothing fake about it.

Stop and stare

He brought one hand down, trailing it through her curls until it rested on her upper arm. He trailed his finger tips up and down the skin there, a gentle motion that seemed to have her surrender to him. His other hand cradled her hair beneath her hair, so he felt it when she seemed to surrender, her neck collapsing a little as she leaned ever so slightly into his hold. He leaned forward, closing the gap even more as he rested his forehead against hers, and the additional contact as well as the motion of his finger tips was enough to make her shudder.

I think I'm moving but I go nowhere

Her shudder ran through her, transferring onto him. Knowing that she was in the moment as much as he was gave him the courage to move again; too intoxicated in the moment to think of any reason to stop. The hand that was on her arm moved, settling on her lower back. His hand landed on nothing but bare skin, the top of his hand teased by the very last length of her hair. As his thumb stroked the bare skin ever so gently, she trembling unwillingly in his arms once again, only this time she knew it affected him because she felt his breathing hitch.

Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared

She remembered Abby's words: 'he wouldn't hold out like that for just anyone', and put one of her arms around his neck. It would have drawn them closer had they not already been impossibly close. Her other palm was sprawled on his chest, ever so slightly trying to find a hold against the shirt he was wearing. Her eyes were raised to his, only an inch away, and she found herself unable to move under his gaze. His eyes watched her, seeing so deeply that she felt as if he were seeing all her soul, faults and all…eyes that were speaking volumes of words that she knew he'd never say aloud…

I've become what I can be

Breathlessly, Tony spoke, his lips so close to her own that she felt them more than she heard. "Ziva..." It had never been like this under cover; they'd always been so focused on appearing like a married couple that they'd always dived at each other's lips the moment they'd realised they'd be faxing sex again. Now, however, as instinct took over Tony, gradually leaning him closer to her lips, he realised that married couples weren't like that. Of course, they had their passion, but passion wasn't always about speed. Passion was about timing. Passion was leaning in so slowly that it drove both of them crazy…both of them wanting, pleading, for more…

And then the moment was broken. Penny tugged on the side of Ziva's dress. "Ziva, do you want to dance with me now?" she asked.

They broke away, realising what was happening. Tony kept his eyes on Ziva's, even though she decided to avoid his gaze. Instead, she smiled at Penny and took her outstretched hand. "I would love to, Penny," she told her.

As Penny and Ziva went to a different area of the dance floor, Tony heard the last line of the song, one that would echo in his mind, summing up everything he felt when he watched his partner and his daughter interacting with such ease together.

Oh, do you see what I see?

A/N: Now, did I promise you that you'd love this chapter, or what? I can't tell you how much fun I had writing the dance seen, especially that last bit where they weren't actually dancing…now let me ask you…after the last bit of this chapter…do you still love Penny as much as you used to? Ha ha. I'm sorry. I'm so evil.