Disclaimer: I don't own Private, Kate Brian does.

I am sorry if this story seemed to move on too fast, but I felt like it needed to be different. I will give a fair warning that this story won't be happy in the end.

Reed POV

I was sitting in my dad's car looking out the window at Easton Academy. My dad was in Hell Hall talking to Hathaway. I asked him to take me home. I didn't want to be around after him seeing all those people. I felt awful for what I said to Noelle. My dad was taking far too long to get back.

He finally did and the car started. I wiped a tear out of my eyes as we pulled away from the campus. I felt awful for what I said to Noelle still, I knew she wouldn't take it personally. I tried to forget my experiences at Easton, I told Noelle I was coming back but in all honesty, my plan was to graduate from Croton's high school. Go to college at home and never ever see anyone from Easton Academy ever again. I was done with drama.

I knew Noelle would be pissed at me, but there wasn't much I could do about it. I would never see this place again and that was fine with me. My dad had told the headmaster to have the rest of my stuff sent home that I didn't want to make a big deal about it today. He understood why I was leaving. Hathaway looked at me with pity as I told him my father was coming. He knew I went through so much.

"Reed, what happened to make you want this? I mean someone tried to kill you and you went back." My dad said. I looked out the window. Why did I leave? Josh. I couldn't see him every day and know that I couldn't be with him, and if I was with him that he would probably get hurt because that is what happens to people who like me, they get hurt.

"My heart got broken," I answered. My dad looked at me with pity and I looked away. I just wanted this to be over. No more worrying every day about how I look. I could be simple like today, a jean skirt and a pink t shirt. No one in Croton would care, I would probably wardrobe.

The car ride home was silent, my dad knew better than to bring anything else up. He knew I was upset, and he thought I would go back. I walked into my seemingly unfamiliar house; my dog ran up to me and kissed me. I smiled. I was home.

I ran up the stairs, Scott was done with college and he was pre warned not to bother me. I brought my bag into my room and threw it on the floor. I let myself lie down on the bed and cry. I let myself go and be free, not caring if I looked weak or if someone saw. I cared about feeling better, but I knew that wouldn't happen.

A few hours had passed when I heard a light knock on my door. I didn't want to speak to anyone so I ignored it.

"I'm coming in," Scott said. He barged into my room and I threw my extra pillow at him. My eyes were red and I wiped away a tear. "What's wrong loser?" He asked. I laughed lightly at his joke.

"I don't want to talk about it." I said. The real reason I couldn't stay this time was because I was mad. I was mad at Noelle for making me keep her secret. I was mad at Josh for not trusting me. I was mad at myself for being selfish and being mad at Noelle. I wish she knew the reason I left was that I couldn't stand that I was mad at her.

"Come on squirt, do I need to kick some guys ass?" He asked. I laughed I sniffled lightly. Scott came and wrapped his arms around me. "Tell me what happened." He said. I sighed giving in. My brother had a tone he used. I knew it meant he wanted to help. I was going to let him help.

I told him about Mark, or Jesse, or whoever he was. I told him about the premier and I told him about how my friend was being stalked but I couldn't say why. I told him how Josh didn't trust me, and how Josh had broken my heart. I told him everything but who was being stalked and why. He listened and he showed caring.

"Reed, that is terrible." Scott said. I nodded and closed my eyes. When I was little I used to think that if I closed my eyes super tight and wished for something, when I opened them I met get what I wished for, my mom might not be passed out because of drugs.

"The worst part is Noelle thinks it's her fault that I left." I said. He sighed.

"Make her know it isn't." He said. I smiled at his attempted advice. I texted her.

To Noelle

From Reed

It's not your fault, it is Josh's. I am pissed at him and I have a broken heart. I will get back at him though. See you soon!

I hoped she would get out of it that I wasn't mad. When she didn't reply for a while I got nervous, but I ignored the feeling.

After dinner I had gone back up to my room and Scott followed me, he was afraid I was going to hurt myself, I would never do that. I am not that stupid.

"I was going to go to the mall tomorrow, wanna come?" He asked. I nodded. I should get out of the house, reconnect with some people. Maybe work some things out.

"Reed, everything will be ok. I know you love Josh, and things will be ok." He said. I loved my brother, he supported everything that I did.

"I'm not going back there," I said simply. I pushed him out of my room to his protests and slammed the door. I turned the light off and slid into my bed. I closed my eyes and let myself slowly drift off to sleep.

I had a dream about Josh…again. Like every night since the time I snuck in the fence. I saw his face, he smiled until he saw it was me. Then his face turned into laughing at me, disgusted with me. Something I had never even seen before. It looked like he hated me so much, more than at the legacy. I saw wickedness, and then worst of all he turned into James.

When my eyes popped open early in the morning from my nightmare, I wasn't surprised. I just got up and showered. I took one of my famous half hour showers letting the water scold my body. When it ran out of hot water it felt like icicles hitting my back. I got out of the shower to get dressed.

I didn't know what I should wear here, should I go fancy or boring. Part of me wanted to dress nice, to show that I am changed, I am different.

I decided on a sheer pink crop top with spaghetti straps. It had a cherry tree print on it. I wore it over a white tank top with light jean shorts. I grabbed a pair of white flip flops out of my bag and let my hair flow down, it looked straight today.

After getting changed I went downstairs to grab breakfast. No one was up yet in my house. I grabbed a bowl of fresh fruit, something my mom likes to keep up on since she has been clean, and a pop tart, something Scott always insists upon having.

I ate my delicious tasting breakfast and returned to my room. It was 9 now and my parents were both working out. I turned my phone on to see if Noelle had replied. She didn't, I had a few messages from Mark saying that he feels bad, wondering where I am. A few from Taylor sending her love to me. Weirdest of all was a message from Josh. I didn't even open it. I was mad at him, I had the right to be.

I turned my phone on silent so it wouldn't bug me, after I replied to Taylor and Mark and told them I would see them soon, probably a lie. I started typing a history essay, I felt like I should at least finish what I had started.

By the time my essay was done it was eleven and Croton was awake. Scott was up and ready to go to the mall.

"Let's go," He said barging into my room. I rolled my eyes and got up off my bed. I followed him out of the house and into his car.

"Scott, I keep seeing things, like I feel like wherever I turn I see Josh." I confessed. I don't know what made me say it but I felt as though I should tell him. I would look out my window and see blonde curls, only for them to turn around and have black hair in the front and bleached in the back, then I thought I saw his eyes, only for them to turn brown. It was weird.

"Well maybe try not to thinking about him then." Scott suggested. I laughed at his suggestion, that would be hard.

"It's kind of hard when you love someone not to think about them." I said. Scott nodded and looked sad for me.

"It'll be ok squirt," He said. I smiled and nodded, wanting to believe it would be true. Somehow I felt like it wouldn't, something didn't feel right. Something felt, missing, wrong.

"Thanks, for trying." I said. Scott nodded before pushing me. I laughed. Soon enough we arrived at the mall.

We walked into our small town mall. The shops were like home, not everything designer this or designer that. To my dismay Scott had a group of friends there, in that group was Adam Robinson, my first boyfriend ever, he never really seemed to get over me.

"So how has the privileged life been?" Adam asked me. He was sticking close by me and Scott seemed to think it was hilarious.

"Oh fine, no dramas lately," I lied. I didn't feel like telling him about everything that went on. We passed a shop, the cashier looked like Josh. He had curly blonde hair, but his face was far from the face I loved.

I sighed and frowned, every other person I saw seemed to look like Josh in some way shape or form. I kept walking with my head down.

"Well at least no one is trying to kill you," Adam said. He made me laugh, last time I saw him was because someone in fact tried to kill me.

"Yeah no one is trying to kill me this time," I said. My frown returned when I saw another Josh look alike in the food court at the mall.

He had the same build as Josh did, and his hair was the exact same. I turned away because I knew when I turned back it would probably be some middle aged balding guy. When I turned back around the image didn't go away, he looked exactly like the blonde hair blue green eyed boy I had fallen in love with.

"Excuse me for a minute," I said to Adam. I ran up to meet with Scott who was a few paces ahead of me. "Scott is it just me or is there a curly blonde boy at the table over there." I whispered in his ear. He turned and looked.

"No you aren't crazy; there is a curly blonde over there. Why?" He asked. I gulped and sighed. I didn't know whether to be upset or happy. I mean my heart flipped when I saw him which means I obviously still love him which I already knew, but this wasn't him. It reminded me that I would probably never see him again.

"He looks just like him," I said under my breath. Scott frowned and hooked his arm around me.

"Reed I will go get us some pizza, why don't you grab a table and sit down." Scott said. I nodded. I made my way over to a large table that could fit most of Scott's friends.

Adam followed me over. I rolled my eyes and forced a smile. He sat in the seat next to me, this made me uncomfortable.

"So Reed, I was wondering if you weren't doing anything tonight if you would want to hang out." He asked. I felt bad about this.

"Well um as nice as it sounds I don't think I can." I said. I turned my head to look at the blonde boy again, this time he wasn't there. I frowned.

"Maybe another night?" He asked. I sighed slightly, he just wouldn't give up.

"I don't think it's a good idea," I said. Adam frowned slightly. I looked and Scott and the rest of his friends were still in line.

"Think about it?" He asked. I nodded, this just got so much more uncomfortable.

"Reed," I heard a voice. No, it couldn't be. I was hearing him now too. "Reed," I heard it again. I turned around and standing a few steps behind me was unmistakably Joshua Hollis. Here, in Croton Pennsylvania looking for me.

"Um," I said. Josh moved closer to me standing beside me.

"Reed can we talk, in private." He asked. I didn't know what to say. Scott was still in line and Adam was still string at me.

"Reed who is this?" Adam asked. I didn't know what to say.

"This is Josh." I said. Adam wanted to protest for more of an explanation but I had stood up and was marching away. Josh looked confused and was following me.

"Scott can we go please." I shouted when I got closer. Scott saw me, then he saw the boy right behind me before he made an 'o' with his mouth.

"Um in a little bit," Scott said. He got a smile on his face before turning around. I glared at the back of his head before turning around to see Josh again. I wanted to be angry with him but he came all the way here to see me.

"Whatever you have to say I don't really want to hear it." I said. I walked away down a strip of stores.

"Reed wait, I was stupid and I didn't trust you and I am sorry. Noelle told me everything." He said. When the last words left his mouth my feet stopped in my tracks and he caught up with me.

"So you were so stupid that you couldn't trust me you broke Noelle and made her tell, I am sure not on nice terms." I said. I was even angrier now.

"Yes I am an idiot I am stupid and I am sorry. But I knew I made a mistake with everything that I did. Letting you go was the stupidest thing I could ever do. I am sorry, I was a jerk and an ass hole and I would understand if you never wanted to see me again. But there is something important, I asked some girls. Noelle never went home last night, she is missing." Josh said. My mouth dropped open. Noelle was missing. The room started spinning, this was my fault.

"You didn't start with that." I whisper yelled at him. He looked again like he was stupid. I smiled at the look of sorrow on his face; it reminded me of when we were together. "And for the record, I could never not want to see you." I said. His expression brightened. I started walking back to the food court.

"Where are we going?" Josh asked. I smiled before turning to him.

"I am going to tell my brother that you are taking me home, and I am packing and then you are taking me to Easton so we can find Noelle." I said. Josh smiled again.

"So I am finally meeting your parents," He said smiling still.

"Yup, my dad hates you right now." I continued smiled. His face fell and he looked afraid. I walked over to where Scott was sitting down.

"Hey, um he is taking me home, and then I am going back. The friend I was telling you about is missing." I said quietly so no one else would hear. Scott stood up and walked over to Josh.

"You break her heart worse, I mess up your face," Scott said. Josh's eyes were full of fear, I laughed and waved to Scott.

"See you soon," I said giving him a hug. He waved goodbye as I slipped out of the crowd. I walked away with Josh and things felt right, but then again I wanted to kill him.

I gave him directions to my house so he could drive me home. He looked at me sheepishly as we waited at the forever light. We nicknamed one of the red lights in Croton the forever light because if you got stuck at it you hoped the situation wasn't awkward. It took at least fifteen minutes to wait at it.

"So can we talk?" Josh asked. I sighed and unfolded my arms.

"About which thing, you not trusting me, you breaking Noelle, you thinking I cheated on you, you being mad at me while one of my best friends was in a coma in the hospital, or the kicker, running around with a different girls every night?" I asked with a smug smile on my face.

"Ok I know I took things too far, I was hoping to make you jealous because I missed you, I loved you and when I thought you cheated I couldn't bear to think about not being with you." Josh said. I got a little bit less mad.

"Doesn't make up for it," I said kind of nastily.

"I know it doesn't but I am hoping I can make it up to you." Josh said. "I can't lose you, I love you." He said. I softened up a little bit.

"Josh I love you too but if you can't trust me I can't be with you." I said. It broke my heart to let those words come out of my mouth.

"I trust you," He said. "I know I was stupid before but I know now, I can trust you more than anyone." He said.

"Ok then," I said. The light finally turned green. The awkward moment was over. Just a few more minutes until we got to my house.

"Does this mean we are back together?" Josh asked hopefully. I looked down at my shoes and wiggled my toes.

"This means we are on our way." I said. He smiled at me and I pointed to my house. He pulled in the driveway. My parents were hopefully ready by now.

I opened the door, Josh behind me. My mom was baking some sort of dessert and my dad was reading a book in the living room.

"Hey dad, can we talk about school?" I asked. He set down his book, saw Josh with me and stood up.

"What is he doing here?" My dad asked. I may have possibly told him that one reason was that my boyfriend and I were having problems.

"He came to fix things. Dad I want to go back, people have been bugging me since I left. I am really sorry," I said. My dad looked at the sincere look on my face and sighed giving in.

"Ok, I will email the headmaster and tell him you decided to return after all." My dad said. I smiled and gave him a bear hug.

"I'll see you soon." I said. I ran up to my room with Josh following me. I threw what I had taken out of my bag back into it.

"You weren't coming back?" Josh asked. I shook my head.

"No, I wasn't." I answered. He got a smile on his face.

"That means I still influence you," He said. I glared at him slightly.

"Don't get a big head about it, you are still in trouble." I said. Josh nodded his head, being ok with that.

I said goodbye to my parents once more. I put my bag in Josh's car. As he pulled out of the driveway I smiled, I wasn't happy about being here for senior year. I was going back and even though I wanted to leave, I wanted even more to go back.

My life was starting to turn around again. Josh and I could work things out. I could apologize to Noelle. My life was starting to fall back into place, and then my phone rang.

Miss your friend Noelle, I have her and you won't be getting her back. Come and find her Reed Brennan or I will kill her. Here's a clue, not that it will help. Maybe you shouldn't party so much…

James

p.s. you have forty eight hours

My heart stopped. My head was spinning and everything fell apart. Noelle was in danger. It was all my fault.

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Will Reed and Josh work it out?

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