Late Arrivals And Lifetime Rivals: Snape's Worst Halloween
Chapter 26: The Snake And The Hag
Nagini slithered next to Severus Snape.
"I am not a companion, Nagini. Make contact with my person and you will die." Nagini reluctantly slithered away. The Dark Lord had informed Snape that he was sure Nagini would be honored by his costume as well. Obviously, the Dark Lord had not communicated the fact that Severus was in costume to Nagini yet.
Snape wished the slimy snake would leave him alone.
Professor Vector stifled a giggle as she saw Nagini turn and slither back, but fail to leave.
The basilisk's neck shot her a look so menacing she became silent.
"Snake gloves are superb for working with potions, Nagini, might I remind you," said Snape within Nagini's hearing.
Nagini finally slithered away to be next to her master.
The Dark Lord was on the other side of the room encircled by his loyal followers and was chatting animatedly.
"Did I not tell you that OUR party would be better than that fool Dumbledore's? He is getting on in years and losing his touch, I assure you." He whispered conspiratorially to a few Death Eaters nearby, "Also…we are all to be respectful to Severus Snape's, er, date," ordered the Dark Lord firmly.
"But, my Lord, he is dating a hag. They eat children…" said Lucius Malfoy.
Voldemort's expression seemed to say, "And?"
"Master, I can not look upon her face for sustained periods of time without feeling quite ill," said Alecto.
"Of course, it must be quite difficult coming to terms with the realization that Severus prefers, er, hags over you," offered the Dark Lord. "There is no accounting for taste, Alecto. He is my loyal servant and is a talented wizard. One can't excel in every personal detail about ones self. You were far too young to witness his fawning over Potter's mother. If he wishes to carouse with a hag, so be it. We will find you a husband eventually…
Alecto looked like she was going to cry or break into one of her murderous rages from embarrassment.
"Do not pout, Alecto. It is my party…and if you insist on ruining the atmosphere, I will have no choice but to kill you and feed your dead body to Nagini." sing-songed the Dark Lord in a chilling voice.
Alecto shut up.
"That is better. Perhaps if the situation with the hag does not work out…I can put in a good word for you," offered Lord Voldemort, in a rare, generous mood.
Alecto's unattractive mouth turned up into what looked like a smile. Yes, I would never have thought of it…perhaps my Lord can FORCE Severus to notice me.
Her unattractve face beamed the rest of the night, which was still very unattractive nonetheless.
"Look at her! She disobeyed your orders, my Lord. The only guest not in costume," simpered Wormtail, as he tried to get back at Snape by attacking his date while trying to remember the drink orders.
"Silence!" said a high, cold voice. "It is, er, a nice costume, er, well thought out. Severus is my faithful servant. Do not make fun of his…girlfriend."
Alecto looked about ready to burst into angry tears and throw herself on the ground kicking and screaming which she usually did until her brother pulled her off the floor by her hair.
"Is that really his girlfriend?" asked Lucius Malfoy. Snape had just dined at Malfoy Manor two nights ago and hadn't mentioned that he was seeing anyone.
"Yes, I can always tell. He is obviously enamored with her. Look at their body language. How, er, sweet! He is offering her a cockroach cluster. Ah, I can just imagine the smell now, if only I could breathe through my nose," offered the Dark Lord wistfully.
So it wasn't considered a nose anymore, pondered the Death Eaters, as they tried not to look at the two slits above Voldemort's mouth and failed to make eye contact with him after stealing a few glances.
"Speaking of enamored…" Bellatrix sidled up to the Dark Lord again. She loved his nose…but mostly his magnetism and his power, of course.
Lord Voldemort shook his head and rolled his eyes impatiently.
"Bella, I have told you time and time again." (Voldemort left out the part about her repeated marriage proposals to him behind Lestrange's back)
"My dearest loyal, faithful slave…" This was the closest thing to something warm and heartfelt that the cold-hearted Voldemort could utter in all evil conscience. It was his highest compliment.
"It is flattering, Bella, but we have had this conversation before. In my quest for world domination and the torture and untimely deaths of thousands, I have no equal, er, partner," said the Dark Lord nervously.
"I will wait for you, my love, I mean, my Lord. I can adore you from afar," shouted Bellatrix hysterically. Bella's husband elbowed her roughly. She never took "no" for an answer. Not even from the Dark Lord.
Lord Voldemort noted this. "That would be fine, right, Lestrange?"
"Yes, my Lord," insisted Bellatrix's husband.
The Dark Lord had to be careful. He once told Bellatrix that the only thing in the world he could come close to feeling what love must be like for foolish mortals like themselves was the joy he took in himself and his pet, Nagini. An excellent snake…not to be compared with other snakes, he bragged. He never said it again after Bella threatened to kill his snake Nagini.