22 years earlier

Fiona

I'm driving back from Stansted and I'm bloody furious. Why even I agreed to drive her is beyond me. Nicky said I should. Like my doing something stupid for my sister is practically a sacred duty. But that's just because he's stupid over his own sister. Not that I would say that to him. Saying something against Ebb in front of Nicky is asking for trouble. He doesn't quite have a temper but there's something wild about him. Why I go with him in the first place.

And why Tasha left too, at least in part. Though I don't tell him that either. She reckons his mates are dangerous, not just mad. Messing with things they've no leave to be messing with, she said. Stirring up powers best left at rest. I laughed right out loud at that one. Who'd have thought sensible Tasha would turn up the superstitious one? The boys are playing at being kings. There's nothing worse that comes of it then some iffy smells and a lot of boring shite about ancient Gaelic and spirit walkers.

Even if they had done. Why she would up and leave because of Nicky and Davy and the half-arsed cult they think they're starting is still a right mystery, isn't it? I say she's acting all pissy because no one's listening to her. Not doing as they're told. Can't have that, can she. Bossy tit. Even Lucy's gone over. With Davy himself, if rumors are true.

Ebb's angry with me as well. Says Davy's not right in the head. Says we should be pulling Nicky and Lucy out of there before something bad can happen. I told her she can up and move to New York with bloody Tasha if that's how she's going to be. No chance I'm going to be more of a frightened mouse than Lucy. Ebb says no way she'd leave Nicky behind. Which is the only thing she and I agree on these days.

Mitali hasn't actually skipped the pond, but she may as well have for all we see of her these days. Got herself pregnant and married and now she's too good for the rest of us. I can't say as I'm sorry to be rid of her. She and Ebb and Lucy used to be close. Too close, no room for me. Ebb said I was stupid to be jealous, that I'd always be her best mate. Wouldn't have thought it of Ebb to be a liar. She says its me who's changed. But she says it's Nicky who's changed too. So I said, when you think everyone around you's changed, maybe it's time to have a good look at yourself. She got quiet at that. She and I wouldn't talk to one another at all anymore if it weren't for Nicky, would we?

Natasha

I sigh as I wait to board the flight. I know Fi is angry with me, but I'm hoping she'll forgive me eventually. There's nothing left for us in London. Leaving her is a calculated risk. I'm hoping if I move first, she'll be more likely to follow. And Malcolm's firm had an overseas position open. Columbia recruited me with a promise of tenure and hints of becoming dean. When fate speaks to you that clearly, even I think it's daft to ignore it. So it seemed like now or never.

I already tried getting her to come with me now. She looked at me in that way she has since she was twelve. I hate when she looks at me like that. But I can't totally begrudge her for it. I'm really more her mother than her sister, the only mother she ever really had. And every teenager needs someone to look at that way.

It's not that I don't like Nicky. I like him just fine. But I've seen what happens to people around Davy. Honestly, I'm scared I've seen too much. I see the way Davy looks at me now. It's the the calculating look of an imposter to the throne, bent on weeding out threats to his ascendency.

He has a different face for everyone. I don't understand how the others can't see it. He looks at me knowingly, eyes sharp with glinting conquest. He looks at Nicky with possessive avarice. He looks at Fiona with disdain. He looks at Lucy with malice and lust. He glances past Ebb, too disinterested to even bother looking.

The only time I've ever seen Nicky stand up to him is when Davy made one of his pompous remarks about the duality of spirits, but illustrated it with a reference to glorious, powerful Nicky and empty, pointless Ebb. As if I needed more evidence that Davy's thick on top of being mad.

Ebb's deeper than a stone well, and just as solid. It gives me some hope for Fiona to grow out of this nonsense she's into now. She still loves Ebb. I love Ebb too, even though I sometimes wish she hadn't brought Nicky into Fiona's life. Because with Nicky, came Davy.

Nicky is the one thing Ebb is stupid about. Not that I can blame her for that. Orphan twins should look out for each other, rich as they might be. Same as I look out for Fiona. Though she's much younger than I am, so it feels different from Ebb and Nicky. All of us are orphans of different wars, heirs to different fortunes. One thing we'd all agree on, we'd happily trade away the fortunes to get back the families we lost. War has its way of burning itself into your blood for generations. And all of our blood burns with it.

Not Mitali, she has her family. Or Lucy. There was some trouble with her brother growing up. He got thrown out of the house. So she's not close with her parents, but you can still see the imprint of growing up loved. She manages to see the good in everyone. Which would be a better trait, if one of that 'everyone' wasn't Davy. None of us know where Davy came from. He just appeared one day, and started weaving his dark web around everyone I know.

Fucking Davy. Davy is so full of shite. Ebb knows. But none of the rest of them notice. Fiona's so busy proving she's not a child that she's not using the good sense I know I've drilled into her somewhere. Nicky thinks this is his path to... I don't even know. His path to wherever it is he's going.

2 years later (20 years ago)

Fiona

Back at Stansed. I can hardly credit that it's the same place I brought Tasha just two years ago. That I'm the same person. It feels like nothing is the same.

This time it's Ebb I'm taking. Least I could do for Nicky. Fucking Nicky. Poor Nicky. Bloody idiotic Nicky. Turns out I don't know fuck all about people.

I should admit it to Tasha, go with Ebb. But the thought of that smug look on Tasha's face stops me. I can't be anyone when Tasha is there. Beautiful, brilliant, bloody perfect Tasha. I'm better off here. In what's left of my world. Which is basically nothing but the city itself.

It all went to shite, just like she said it would. I bloody hate it when Tasha's right. Particularly when her being right means my boyfriend's on the run from the police, caught up in some twisted scandal involving satanic rites and kidnapped children.

Davy managed to avoid any connection to the mess, the bloody tosser. Even though it was only him all along. And now he's found a way to disappear same as he first appeared, without a trace. Lucy's gone too. Her mother gets letters from her from California, but only she's daft enough to believe they're real. But it's enough so that there's no missing persons report filed. Police are bent on nabbing Nicky, and no one's looking for Davy.

Ebb's all broken up. Won't speak. Won't eat. Won't stop blaming herself for what happened. Just cries and cries, all the time. She disappeared for a spell too, but turned up on some goat farm in Wales. When I told Tasha, she told me to send Ebb to her. Which is what I'm doing now. And then I'm washing my hands of them all.