Patchouli did not finish early.

Fifty days… I think to myself.

It's been a month and a half since Patchouli started her research. She's nearly two weeks behind her promise. Even though I know better than to question the magician, I can't help but wonder what is taking so long. I've become restless and frustrated. I know it's for the best, but I can hardly stand the waiting.

During this time I've followed Patchouli's advice. I keep a daily routine, one that I follow religiously. It helps to always have a designated time for everything… but it's been fifty days. For a normal human, it might be fine. But not for me… time's passing is slow and painful. I don't sleep, I don't eat. I'm a living weapon, and with no purpose, I am just useless. I feel like I'm wasting away in this mansion.

But despite my frustration, the world continues without me. Everyone is slowly going back to their regular routine.

Sakuya… She's always working. Cleaning, cooking, preparing, advising… she does it all. The fairies are rather incompetent, so she does most of the work. She has control over time, and by using a magical pocket watch she can complete extraordinary amounts of work in mere seconds. Sakuya is usually busy all the time, so she does not talk to me much anymore.

Remilia… If I ever get a chance to talk with the maid, it's because she happens to be with Remilia. The vampire mistress has been coming to me more and more often, mostly because Patchouli won't listen to her right now. I find her arrogant attitude to be annoying, but she can be insightful and wise at times too, so I try to make the most of our conversations. She may sometimes call me away from whatever I'm doing just to sit down and have tea and chat, or she might just show up at random to ask me some questions. It's a pleasant distraction at least.

Flandre… Remilia's sister is rarely seen. If I do see her, she is either being guided away, or is with Remilia. I've been told she is never to leave the mansion. I've also been told that she has some 'dangerous' behaviors, so I just try to avoid her all together. Just like her sister though, she has a habit of showing up randomly, almost like she materializes from the mist. She speaks nonsense to me, and often seems a little crazy. I wonder what her story is sometimes.

Meiling… The person I talk with the most. Following my own advice, I've taken up duty as a secondary guard to the mansion. With no need to eat or rest, I often replace Meiling so she can take a break. Other than that, we often work side by side at the gates or patrol separately on the grounds. Meiling is friendly and talkative. Like Remilia, she has a lot of interest in things from the outside world, and often asks me questions. I enjoy talking with her and remembering my old world. My memories may be long gone, but I still hold onto what I can.

As for me…

I spend most of my time outside guarding with Meiling or talking with Remilia. I don't get many intruders, but the occasional troublemaking fairy is easy work for my pistol. Other than that, I leave most of the serious threats for the real guard. I take a few breaks during the afternoon to relax and get away from working, but since I'm not employed here I can just leave whenever I feel like; sometimes I do.

When I take breaks I often come here. A place few know how to access, and fewer bother to visit. The one place in the mansion with a window. The one place I won't be bothered by Remilia or Flandre or fairies or whatever else.

The clock tower.

Funny that I should find peace from time's passing amidst the gears of the giant clock. The slow, rhythmic clacking of the countless gears is soothing and relaxing. Rhythms like this help put my mind at ease. I don't know how the mechanisms work, but they are always turning, always moving that minute hand ever so slowly. The dull light shining through the massive clock face is easy on the eyes too.

There is a glass door next to the clock face that permits access to a tiny outside balcony. I can walk outside the tower and look over Gensokyo from here, or on colder days like today I can just stare out through the door and watch the day play out. From here, I quietly watch the world I no longer visit. It really is quite beautiful compared to the great iron cities I come from.

I've just finished another day of guarding. So far, my day has been just another day of waiting.

But today…

Come on… after fifty days she finally finds something, but then I have to wait even longer? What is she preparing that is so important that she has to make me wait again? She knows how I feel about this! She better not be lying to me… I angrily think while I wait for her summons.

Today, Patchouli has made a breakthrough. I went to see her, but she immediately tells me to wait for noon. I don't know why, but I can barely stand the anticipation. It's only two minutes to noon now though, so she should be sending a fairy to come find me any second.

Suddenly, I feel a shadow fall over my mind.

I have returned once more. My work is now finished. I see you have returned to this tower again. I assume nothing has happened yet.

I mentally sigh at Arcane's return. The mysterious dark god has been coming and going over the past few days. Most of the time he reappears in my mind and immediately leaves again without saying anything, other times he says nothing more than a sentence or two. I still wonder what his plans really are. What is he doing in Gensokyo? What am I to him? What is he and why does he need suffering? I still have no answers.

I reluctantly reply to him. Actually, Patchouli said she made some progress today. I'm waiting for her to-

"Um… excuse me? Is Knight here?"

I stand up and look towards the lower stairs. On them is a fairy maid, curiously looking around as she climbs the unfamiliar tower. I walk over to the edge of the railing and lean over.

"Up here." I say to her.

She jerks her head up, looking a little bit surprised. She calms down though, and relays her message. "Patchouli wants to see you in the library. She's expecting you so please hurry."

Finally! "Ok. I'll be right there."

I hope this is good. I don't want to go down there to be told that she can't find anything. I don't want to find out I just wasted a month for nothing.

We shall see.

I quickly walk down the rickety metal stairways and approach the fairy. The messenger waves goodbye and takes off in front of me, leaving me to descend alone. I quickly jog down the metallic steps and reach the bottom after a minute or so. The stairs lead down to an open trap door with some old folding wood steps.

I leave the gears of the clock tower behind and descend into the room below. There is a table and a candle in here and nothing else. This probably used to be some party room or something, but is now in complete disuse. By chance, I came into this room in my spare time and found a trap door open. This is the only way I know into the tower.

I exit the room, leaving the stairs down behind me. Now familiar with these crimson halls, I quickly make my way to the library. The clock tower is about in the middle of the mansion, and the library is near the leftmost side of the mansion. It does not take me very long to reach it from here.

I reach the old library doors and push them open. Inside Patchouli is waiting for me at her desk, reading some book like usual. She looks up at me as I approach her.

"Knight." She acknowledges me in her usual terse fashion.

I greet her back. "Hey there Patchouli. I'm dying to know something here. What did you get for me? Did you finally come to a conclusion?"

She nods. "Yes… this may take a bit of explaining, and this might confuse an outsider like you. I hope you are really ready for this."

Uh oh… "I'm not going to like this am I?"

She does not reply. Instead, she beckons for me to come over.

I walk over to her. She reaches into her desk and hands me a thick musty book, already open to a page.

"Read it." She says.

I hesitantly look down into the book and read the passage aloud.

"Chapter eleven… The secret of the ancient golems. While most think golems as simple constructs of conjured matter, they were once feared as an extremely advanced race, controlled by powerful dark lords. The ancient gods relied on mostly on their followers to serve as prophets for them. But the four dark gods, Loss, Suffering, Fear, and Chaos, were isolated and had no followers to send. Instead, they created golems to do their work. Using their corrupted dark magic, they were able to create the perfect servant. These automations were completely life like, and acted as messengers, vessels, or champions for their creators. Unlike any normal golem, these creatures had their own souls, and were both intelligent and dangerous. During times of war, these ancient servants were extremely powerful due to being made from the pure power of their gods. They were capable of creating destructive weapons from their own energy, and were even capable of slaying other warring gods. Relying only on the power that they are made of, they served loyally for countless years without rest. These were… truly fearsome… beings."

Rest… weapons… dark god… am I?

I continue reading. "Eventually, all of these golems were destroyed and the dark gods fell out of existence. As the dark gods disappeared, they took the secret to the perfect creation with them. The means for creating these creatures is now long forgotten. The magic art of constructing golems was later rediscovered, but these are only a crude shadow of these once terrifying beings."

I put the book down.

Patchouli speaks quietly. "I know it sounds strange, but there is no other thing I can think of. No living thing is sustained by pure power like you, and your abilities match the description to the letter. I do not know how, and I do not know why. By all means, you should not even exist, but you are a golem… a very old and powerful one."

All I can think of is that thing I fought yesterday. That lumbering metal beast she called a metal golem. Is that what I have been reduced to? A thing? A construct? A machine?

I sigh and look downward.

Did you expect anything else? You are a servant to me, and nothing more. The distorted voice of Arcane says once again.

I thought… I thought I died and you resurrected me. You mean to say that I died and you 'rebuilt' me? I angrily think back.

What the book does not detail is that the reason our servants were 'life like' is because they were made from life. Or rather… dying life.

So I was never resurrected. You took my body and rebuilt me into a golem. But why the eyes? She said I had the eyes of a devil. Even Koakuma agreed.

Admittedly, the process was not always 'perfect' like this books states. Your death left you a mess. I had to make some replacements. I took what was still available to me, reaching out from the edge of my domain to gather whatever broken remains I could. I gathered the missing parts and spun my essence into you. Thus, I remade you.

I… I can't believe this. I'm… not even alive. I'm not even dead! Are these thoughts just magical processes then? Is this all some fake personality I have? I might not even be the same person I once was!

"Knight. I know that may be hard to hear, but it is the truth. Just because you are a golem does not mean you cannot live a normal life here. You are still you. You still have a place amongst us here in Gensokyo." Patchouli says to me.

I shout back at her. "What do you mean live? I'm not even alive! Gah, I can't believe this! How could this happen to me? Why me? Why do I have to be a machine? What am I going to do with myself now? I don't want to go on like this! I'm not even a person. I don't even have a 'life' to fight for anymore..."

I slam my fist into her desk to vent some frustration. I remain standing there, leaning over the desk muttering to myself.

A chair pulls away. I hear a shuffling of robes. I feel a tap from Patchouli on my shoulder. Slowly, I pull myself upright and turn to face her.

Then… a crack. Pain.

"Ow!" I take a step back as Patchouli slaps me across the face.

She rubs her hand for a second before speaking. "First. Do not shout in the library. Second. That was perhaps the most pathetic overreaction ever. You are a grown man, act like it. Third. I was only giving you want you wanted. If you are going to deny the truth like a child than you can get out of here. This is a place of wisdom, not ignorance. And fourth. Just because you are not a living thing does not mean you cannot have a life. You are no machine, and certainly no servant. You are still you, regardless of what you are. Now that you know who you are you can move on and live."

I remain quiet, still shocked by her slap.

"So. Are you going to let this destroy you? Or am I still looking at a Knight?" She asks me.

I take a deep breath before finally replying. "Your right… I am… Knight, a golem."

Hm? You accept this so easily.

Because I know she is right. The forgotten dark gods… you were one of them weren't you? The dark god of suffering. You made me, just like you used to way back when. It makes everything in that book true. If that's the case, then the part about 'being able to kill gods' is true too! I can still stop you, even if I am just a golem. I won't give up. I will rid this world of you.

Persistent. I have dealt with troublesome servants before. When the time comes, you will play exactly as intended, just as the others have before you.

I dare you to try.

Arcane makes a distorted growl before falling silent.

"Knight, are you ok?" Patchouli asks again.

I nod. "Yeah. Just letting this all soak in. I'm good. Um… sorry about that. I really should be thanking you right now. I know you've been working nonstop for me on this. Thanks for everything Patchouli."

She crosses her arms. "Much better. You are most welcome. Now, this brings me to my next point."

Next?

She goes on to explain. "As you just read, you are most likely a golem by that description. An exceptionally old one."

"But I'm not old. I'm new to all of this. " I reply in my defense.

"That is beside the point. The point is that a golem like you is incredibly advanced. More advanced than possible with any modern power. Not even the lunarians and their science could make something as sophisticated and complex as you. You are a rarity and a major discovery. You could have some world changing secrets in your body. Thus… I would like to examine again. More specifically, I want to see inside you." She finishes.

Inside? "What? How are you going to see inside me?"

She points to me. "This is where I need you to help me. I know of a spell that will allow me to project a sort of… how shall I say this… magical chart of your powers."

"Like an X-ray or something?" I ask.

She gives me a blank, slightly irritated look.

I groan. "Never mind…"

She goes on. "Basically, I use this spell on you, it lets me see inside you and draw a picture of your magic. If all goes well, I can figure out what you are made of and how your power works. It would be a big step into gaining a better understanding of who you are and maybe reveal some greater secrets about the way magic and dark forces work."

"So how do I fit into this?" I ask, hoping to get a normal answer from her this time.

She sighs, turning away slightly as she thinks. "Well… this spell is extremely complicated. Two of the ingredients are… unique. I… I am no good with this sort of thing, so I will be blunt. I need you to find some of the spells reagents. I know you do not like combat, but this will require you to hunt down some dangerous people."

I hesitate before replying. "What kind of opponents?"

"There are two things you will need to find. The first is the feather of a certain hell raven in the underground. She is fused with a Yatagarasu, a sun god probably as old as your creators. The holy wisdom of the sun god is still contained inside her body and her feathers." She explains.

Hell raven? That does sound dangerous.

She continues. "The second, I need you to acquire a rare artifact from the highest reaches of youkai mountain. The Sword of Hisou is a powerful celestial artifact that reveals the spiritual nature of a person targeted by it. Usually, this is used for finding and exploiting weaknesses, but combined with the mystic wisdom of the Yatagarasu I will be able to see and understand the nature of your power. After that, I can map out the details and use them as a reference."

Sword of Hisou. I'll probably have to take from its wielder no doubt…

She goes on to finish, becoming more enthusiastic with each sentence. "You can help me reveal a great magical secret Knight. The power of the dark gods, the power of the perfect creation. Knight, you can not only live, you can make a difference in this world. The secrets inside you could redefine Gensokyo."

One to understand, one to see. Perception and wisdom combine to create knowledge. A sound effort.

Understand my power… that would be a good step in figuring out how to use it against Arcane. But…

"What's so difficult about it?" I ask.

She sighs as my question brings her mood down. "I will admit these are not things that will be easy to acquire. Neither of their owners will be willing to give up their item. You will be facing some very strong opponents, and you will make several enemies."

Geez… It can't be easy can it? Well fine. I can't give up and let Arcane have his way with me. They may not understand… but it's for the best. I have to stop Arcane no matter what.

I agree. "I understand. If it helps figure out how I work, then I'll do it. I need to learn as much as I can about these strange powers I have. I'll help you."

Patchouli looks a bit surprised. "You are sure then? Our arrangements are square you know. I helped you once, you helped me once. We are even now. This is purely voluntary on your part."

"No. It's not. I need this. I'll do whatever it takes to help you solve this." I confirm again.

She nods. "Very well. I am glad to have your assistance."

"Happy to offer it." I reply. "Now, where do I find this sword wielder and hell raven?"

She goes back to her seat and opens a book again. This is usually a sign that she is about to dismiss me.

She talks to me while sifting through some old spells. "I will tell you tomorrow morning. I have something to finish preparing first. Get here early so you can head off soon. There is going to be a lot of walking, so you should prepare some things for the travel in the meantime. You would also do well to rest. Keep your strength up, and I will see you tomorrow."

More waiting. Well I'm fine with that this time. This time I'm getting somewhere. I'd better go get my things together for tomorrow.

"Right. Thanks again. I'll be here tomorrow. See you then." We both give a quick wave goodbye to each other and turn our separate ways.

I begin to head out the door when someone else comes in. The door opens before I can touch it to reveal Remilia and Sakuya.

The vampire smiles a little when she sees me. "Ah, Knight. I was looking for you. I heard Patchy just found out what you are. Did I miss the big reveal?"

I open my mouth to answer, but another voice interrupts me.

"Hello Master Scarlet and Master Izayoi. You just missed it. Knight is a golem."

I close my eyes and sigh as the succubus speaks for me.

Remilia tilts her head. "Golem? Like one of Patchy's creations? You certainly don't look like a golem."

"Oh, that's because he is a special one. We think-"

I whirl around and glare at Koakuma, who quiets as I shoot a little of my fear spell into her. "I can speak for myself Koakuma."

I blink the spell away as I turn back to Remilia. "Anyways, it's complicated. I'm probably made from some really old and dark spells or something. Patchouli thinks it's good stuff, and wants me to get some things for her so she can perform a spell that will allow her to make sense of my powers."

"My, how interesting. It seems Patchouli has really taken a liking to you. How about you tell me about it over some tea?" Remilia offers.

You probably meant to be late just so you could say that. Devious little vampire…

I slowly nod in agreement. "Yeah. Sure. But not too long; I got to get ready to go later."

"Oh we have time, right Sakuya?" Remilia asks to her maid.

"Of course My Lady."

She gestures for me to follow. "Come, let us talk."

Remilia turns away. I follow after her. I am followed by Sakuya, and Koakuma trails behind.

"Koa! Where do you think you are going? Get back here and help me with these books!" Patchouli calls from her desk.

The devil sighs and reluctantly turns back. Patchouli may be a hard worker, but she drives Koakuma just as hard. I don't blame the succubus for taking every chance she gets to be lazy.

Now reduced to three, we head off into the mansion to take part in another afternoon of idle conversation.

But this is no ordinary day anymore. I know what I am, and I know what I can do. I know for certain that I can destroy Arcane. I just have to figure out how. With Patchouli's help, I can finally begin the long journey to unraveling the dark god's curse over me.

Fifty days… worth it.

Indeed.

I feel a bit more at ease after all of this. With a slightly lighter step, I follow Remilia to another session of tea and cake.

One last party before my long and perilous journey.

A/N

Thank you for reading my latest chapter. I put a lot of effort into this one, so I hope you enjoyed it.

A lot of stuff happened here. First, a lot of time passed. I wanted to describe Knight adapting to Gensokyo life a bit more without going through all of the awkward life chapters. I tried having a little fun with Knight reminiscing about the past events, and used this opportunity to expand on some of the mansion's residents and close some gaps.

Then, a reveal about Knight and a little about Arcane. I knew I couldn't keep Knight in the dark forever, and I needed this discovery to be somewhat of an impact. I wanted the type of creature Knight is to be a defining character trait, rather than just a minor story event. I tried thinking of something interesting that would tie into the story and would stand out as unique. Also, Arcane and the three other dark gods mentioned are variations on the (original) four horseman of the apocalypse. Loss as Death, Fear as Conquest, Chaos as War, and Suffering (Arcane) as Famine. Whereas Famine pertains to a widespread loss of food and water, Arcane portrayed as suffering is instead of a widespread loss of hope and faith. The other three are meant to be more metaphysical apocalypses rather than actual plagues, and each one lends power to the others.

Finally, I wanted to be creative with tying the events of youkai mountain and the underground together. I thought bringing Tenshi and Reiuji as two linked goals would be a unique way to send Knight to both those places, and would give me the space I need to unfold more of the story. It might be a little outlandish, but I think it works.

Anyways, Thank you again for reading my chapter. I hope to have the next ready soon.