Fly - Maddie & Tae.
"One day you will do things for me that you hate. That is what it means to be family." - Jonathan Safran Foer.
Katie had never been so nervous and fidgety before. Or at least, in a long time.
She hadn't slept last night, which wasn't that much of a surprise. But she felt more tense and uncomfortable than she had since she'd gotten to the tower. Even while she took her morning shower and got dressed in a pair of comfy black pants and a white tee. Katie couldn't relax.
Today was her first therapy session.
And Katie was nervous as hell.
It had been almost a week since Katie met Sam. He seemed like a nice guy, but Katie's guard was forever up. Sam knew it, Bruce knew it, and her father knew it.
Steve spent whatever time he could at Katie's side. Which basically meant, whenever Bruce wasn't doing his daily check-ups and whenever Katie wasn't asleep, Steve was there with her.
And it was nice. Wonderful, in fact. Katie couldn't even describe how happy she was to see and spend time with her father again. They talked about everything and nothing. Sometimes they didn't even speak. Sometimes, Steve would sit in the chair by the bed and draw while Katie sat in bed reading her book.
Katie was never alone again. They was always someone in the room with her. And if it wasn't an actual person, J.A.R.V.I.S. was just a call away. However, she still had yet to see the guys. To see Thor, Clint, Tony, Natasha. When she asked her father about this, Steve said they all wanted to see her, but they also didn't want to overwhelm her. They wanted her to heal as fast as she could. Though Katie would like to see at least Natasha, she did understand where they were coming from. But it still hurt a little.
But there was still a giant elephant in the room. Almost like a silent agreement of some kind. Especially between Steve and Katie. Steve never asked Katie about what had happened to her and Katie never asked about what had gone on while she was…away. Katie figured it was because neither of them was ready to knew the truth yet. Well, Katie knew she wasn't, that was for sure. Their conversations stayed as far away for S.H.I.E.L.D. and HYDRA as possible.
Until today anyways.
Katie sighed and started to bite her finger nails as she sat cross-legged in the middle of the bed. There was a book opened in front of her but she couldn't even make out any words at this moment.
Even since Katie got here, basically, she tried to keep her thoughts as far away from HYDRA and Strucker and List. In fact, besides the fact that Katie was in a hospital room, life almost felt like it was back to normal again. She didn't want to relive everything again. She knew what happened in these kind of therapy sessions. She had an idea of what kind of questions Sam would ask her. He would ask her very personal ones. And even though Bruce was going to be there until otherwise stated, Katie still didn't trust Sam. Hell, she'd only talked to him a handful of times after they first met, whenever he came into the room with her father. And even then he was only in the room for fifteen minutes or so.
And Kate knew her father trusted him. She could see in by the way they acted around each other. Like the best of friends. Like they'd been through something together that made them very close. Steve had told her how they met, but not much else. Katie figured it crossed over into the 'do not speak about' pile.
Katie was pulled from her thoughts. She jumped as the door to her room was pushed open. Looking up, she found Bruce walking into the room with Sam right behind him.
"Morning Katie," Bruce sent her a warm smile.
"Hi Katie," Sam gave her an equally welcoming smile. "If it's alright with you, we're going to get started right away."
Katie was glad she wasn't hooked up to the monitor anymore. Her heart started to pound against her ribcage. She felt like she was going to be sick on the spot. But despite all this, she took a deep breath in through her nose and nodded her head slightly.
Sam gave her another smile before him and Bruce made their way over towards the window.
A few days back, Bruce and Steve had set up a couch and a few chairs in the corner of her room, over by the window. It was a pretty cozy area, Katie did most of her reading over there. But now, with her shaking form, sitting over there was the last thing Katie wanted to do at the moment.
Bruce and Sam took over the two chairs, leaving the couch for Katie. She slowly lowered herself down on top of the comfy seat. She sat with her back straight, her guard up, as Bruce took out a clipboard with some pieces of paper on it and Sam got himself comfortable in the chair.
"Before we get started," Bruce spoke after a few moments of silence. He was looking at whatever notes he had attacked to his clipboard. "I just wanted to fill you in on a few things Katie."
Katie nodded, her eyes flicking to Bruce as she started picking at her finger nails.
That had become her nervous twitch lately. Picking at her nails.
"I've looked some more into your healing factor," Bruce started, his eyes looking up from the paper. "Even though it doesn't seem like it right now, your body does appear to be healing itself at a rate faster than normal. And without going into much detail," Bruce's eyes flicked to Sam for a moment. Katie suddenly felt like a child whose parents spelled out words so she wouldn't catch on to what they were saying. "It would seem like your mind is doing the same thing."
Katie looked between Sam and Bruce. "What does this mean?"
"It means," Bruce leaned back in his chair. "If you fully commit to these sessions, you should be… you should get better a lot faster than we initially thought."
Katie didn't miss Bruce's little slip up. You should be normal. Not you should get better. But Katie would never be normal again. Bruce knew this, her father knew this, and Katie knew this. There was no going back to normal, no matter how fast her body and mind healed itself. She knew what PTSD did to people in the long run. They never went back to their old selves. But nevertheless, Katie managed to force a small smile on her lips. Because getting better wasn't as good as going back to normal, but it was better than getting worse.
"Okay," Katie nodded softly. "What do I need to do?"
"A nice place to start would be telling me how you're feeling." Sam jumped in.
Katie's eyes flicked open to his. They were a warm brown. Friendly, inviting. But this did nothing to help Katie let down her guard as her eyes looked out the window for a moment. The morning sun was in the bright blue sky. It was cloudy. She could hear the cars and people moving about in the distance. They were fate ?, but they were there.
"Okay." Katie answered as she looked back at Sam. It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the complete truth either.
"Better or worse than when you first woke up?"
Sam's voice didn't hold a bossy tone, but Katie knew he was gently pushing her for an answer.
"Better, I guess." This was true. Katie did feel better compared to when she first woke up in the tower. But her definition of better and Sam's were two completely different ones.
"How so?" Sam leaned forward on his elbows, eyebrows narrowed slightly.
Katie bit the inside of her lip. Her eyes looked over at Bruce. He seemed as if he wasn't paying attention to their conversation at all. He was looking down at his notes, pencil in hand. Every now and then he would write something now. But Katie knew, he was at least half listening to them right now.
She didn't know how she felt better. She just did. She didn't know how to put it into words in her own head, let alone say it out loud to Sam and Bruce.
"Katie."
Her eyes snapped back to Sam as he called her name. He was watching her with a calculating expression. As if he was trying to read her mind. Or maybe he was. Therapists seemed to have a way to see what someone was thinking, Katie had found.
"In order for this to work, you need to be open and honest with me." Sam told her. "You're in control of this session, not me. I need you to tell me your thoughts and feelings in order for me to find out the best way to help you get better. Okay?"
Katie nodded as she looked away. She needed a moment. Her heart and breathing had picked up and her stomach turned while her palms started to feel warm. Talking about what she went through almost made her feel as bad as actually going through it all at this point. But Katie knew she needed to do it. She needed to relive everything to get better again.
Silence fell around to room. Katie turned to the window. She could hear horns honk from below and the sound of Bruce's pencil scratching against the paper. She looked up at the sky. A cloud was moving across the sun slowly, casting a shadow over half the city below. Katie watched as the cloud moved over the sun, and slowly the whole city was bathing in heat again.
The cloud was lifted.
"When I first got here, everything was cloudy." Katie spoke softly, her eyes still out the window. "Fuzzy. And my head… I'd never had a headache before, but that's what it felt like. Like my brain was pushing against my skull." Katie paused as another small cloud moved over the sun. "Everything was so, confusing. And everything hurt. The world was dark and dull. Black and white."
"And now?"
Katie looked away from the window as Sam spoke to her in a soft and caring voice.
"Now," She took a deep breath. "Now , some days, I feel little. The pressure is hardly there and everything isn't as loud. Things are small." Katie looked down at her hands as she started to pick at her nails. "It's only when I start to feel myself starting to be sucked back in that things start to go dark again."
Katie stopped talking and looked up from her nails to find Sam and Bruce watching her. Bruce's pencil was frozen on the page. Katie didn't even realize he'd looked up. As for Sam he was sitting back in his chair, watching Katie with a careful expression. Like he was waiting to see how she would react to what she just said.
It was quiet for a few short moments before Katie tried to let out a light laugh, though it sounded more like a huff. "I'm crazy, aren't I?"
"No," Sam shook his head. Katie looked over at him and found a smile tugging at his lips. "You're not crazy. You're getting better."
Okay. Maybe therapy wasn't so bad.
In fact, the more therapy sessions that Katie ended up having, the littler she would feel afterwards.
Every morning and evening for the next week, Sam and Bruce would show up at her door and lead her over to the couch by the window. Bruce would sit and look over whatever notes he had with him at the time while Sam listened to Katie as she spoke. And the more comfortable Katie got with Sam, the more she opened up. Though they had yet to actually go into detail about what Katie went through. At this point, they mainly talked about how Katie was feeling now compared to then and Sam would teach her ways to control her anxiety. Ways to calm down when she felt like things were getting too much.
In her down time - and when Bruce and Sam weren't in the room - her father stopped by. He must have noticed the change in Katie's attitude, because when Katie felt like she was smiling more than normal, so was Steve. He never talked about what went on in her sessions however, and Katie wasn't sure if that was his rule or Sam's.
Despite all this, however, Katie could still feel the big elephant in the room. No matter how much she talked about her feelings or the different ways Sam showed her how to control her emotions, there was still a weight in her chest. A weight, that Katie knew, wouldn't be removed until she finally talked to someone about what really happened while she was with HYDRA.
All in all, the first week of therapy was good. Then day eight came.
"Where's Bruce?" Katie asked as she saw Sam walk into her room, the door closing behind him.
Katie felt her heart start to pick up. This was a break in the routine. But before she let anxiety completely take over, she remember to breath. She took a deep breath in through her nose, held it for a few moments before letting it out again.
"I asked him if it would be alright if I did this one alone." Sam explained in the same soft and caring voice he always used when he was talking to Katie.
She still found it hard to believe this was the same man that her father met that morning on his run. Steve had made him sound so different, more carefree and funny. Then again, he was most likely putting up a front for Katie. Everyone did these days. Sam, Bruce, her father. They all acted like she was made of glass. Which was another reason Katie couldn't wait to get better. If there was one thing old Katie and new Katie had in common, it was the fact they both hated to be babied.
"How come?" Katie slipped off her bed and slowly followed Sam over to the window. Sam took his normal seat in the chair while Katie sat across from him on the couch.
"You've made good progress this past week, Katie," Sam told her after a few moments of silence, "Amazing progress even. But, we both know you aren't going to complete recover until we talk about what really happened."
Katie sat up straighter. She took another deep breath. It felt like a rock in the pit of her stomach before it started to turn and her heart started to pound.
"I've asked Bruce not to come for privacy reasons," Sam explained, "I know this is going to be hard enough on you just talking to me. And it's up to you if you want to… inform the team of everything later on down the road."
Katie nodded ever so slightly, her eyes shifting to look out at the already setting sun. It was already over a week into November, and the sun was setting earlier and earlier with each passing day. This caused the room to be engulfed in different shades of light blues, yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.
"Katie." Sam spoke, but Katie kept her eyes out the window. "I wouldn't have asked Bruce to stay away if I didn't think you could handle it. The stage you're at in your recovery, it takes most people a month or two to get here while it took you a week."
Sam paused as Katie blinked and shifted her eyes back to him. Her baby blues met his warm brown ones, and Sam didn't look away. He held her gaze. Proving to her that every word he was saying, he meant it.
"You can do this, Katie." Sam told her. "I know you can."
Silence fell around the room once again as Katie closed her eyes for a moment. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm her heart down. She knew everything Sam was saying, he meant. And she did feel better, more in control, than she did a month ago.. Hell, even a week ago. But still. The thought of opening up and telling Sam everything…
Katie sighed. She slowly nodded her head as she opened her eyes. She could have sworn she saw Sam's lips twitch slightly.
"Okay." Katie's voice felt dry in her throat. "Where do we start?"
"We're going to take this slow," Sam started to explain. He paused for a moment as he stood up. He moved the chair over so he was right next to Katie, now sitting by the air ? of the couch. "I've gone over a number of different treatments and therapies for PTSD, and I feel like exposure therapy may be the best for you."
"Exposure therapy?" Katie raised her eyebrow ever so slightly.
Sam nodded.
"Yes. You see, people learn to fear thoughts, feelings, and situations that remind them about a traumatic event that happened to them in the past." Sam explained. "For example, if you were in love but in a bad relationship, you may fear love because of this. So the goal of exposure therapy is to help you have less fear about your memories."
Katie nodded along as she listened to every word that Sam spoke. "How do we do that?"
"There's two different ways, but I think flooding may work better with you." Sam spoke gently before seeing Katie's confused look, explaining. "For what we've talked about over these best few weeks, you seemed to be overwhelmed a lot. Flooding helps you learn not to feel overwhelmed."
Not felling overwhelmed sounded amazing.
"How?"
Sam didn't answer right away. He seemed like he was trying to find the right words to say.
"I'm going to get you to remember as many bad memories as you can, all at once."
Remembering bad memories didn't sound amazing.
After another few long moments of Katie trying to calm herself down and preparing herself to relive the most painful memories of her life, she nodded. The next thing she knew, she was long on her back with her eyes closed.
"Relax." She heard Sam say. "Remember to breathe and control. Nothing can hurt you anymore. They're just memories at this point."
With one last deep breath in, Katie allowed herself to think about what had happened to her for the first time in over a month. It was almost like a little box exploded in her head and she was overcome with different thoughts, feelings, memories. All of which she told Sam about as best as she could as they flashed before her.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Her head was pounding. Her skin felt like it was on fire, especially her torso and legs. She could feel the crushed bones in her right arm. She couldn't breathe. She was in pain.
"Agent Rogers, let me introduce you to… your doctors. Strucker and Dr. List. Fellow HYDRA agents."
"HYDRA has been living within S.H.I.E.L.D. for years and years, Agent Rogers…."
She lost it. The needle pierced her skin and started to dig into the bone.
But for the first time in her life, Katie was really and truly alone.
All Katie felt these days was pain.
Pierce suddenly stopped showing up.
Katie was lost.
Apparently, Katie could scar.
"She may also heal faster mentally."
"I show you fears."
"…show you…"
"… fears."
"Katie. Katie, breathe."
There was a sharp pain in Katie's chest. It was only when she listened to Sam's gentle voice and took a long, deep - and much needed - breath that she realized she basically stopped breathing. She took more and more deep breaths as her lungs filled up with air again.
She could feel herself shaking, and yet she felt a thin sheet of sweat over her whole body. Slowly, Katie opened her eyes. Her lashes were wet and clumped together as tears ran down her cheeks. She could feel her heart beat in her head as well as beating in her chest. She felt like any sudden movement would cause her to be sick right there.
"You're in control, Katie." Sam reminded her. But it did nothing to help.
Katie still felt like she failed. She wasn't supposed to feel overwhelmed with her thoughts and emotions. And yet, she'd never felt more overwhelmed before then she did right now.
She didn't know how long she stayed there, lying on the couch. It felt like hours maybe. But she wouldn't move until she was sure that she wasn't going to be sick and she wasn't shaking anymore. Eventually, she finally lifted herself up so she was now sitting, her back pressed against the couch. Every now and then, a tear or one rolled down her face.
The whole time, Sam sat there. Not saying a word as he watched Katie and waited for her to be ready. It wasn't until she was sitting up a looking at her hands that Sam opened his month again.
"You did good Katie."
But Katie didn't reply.
"I know it doesn't seem like it right now," Sam pushed on. "But it will get easier. And you really did do good. Not many people can control their emotions and stay that in control for that long on their first try."
Nothing. Katie didn't say anything. And Sam must have realized she wanted nothing more than to be alone at this point. He must have seen that he wasn't getting anything else out of her today.
"It will get easier," He tried one last time. He placed his hand gently on Katie's knee, causing her to jump but not to look up. "I promise."
Katie listened as Sam got up from his chair. Her mind was working a million miles an hour. She was seeing flashes of the memories over and over again in her head. It was causing her pain. But, at the same time, she felt lighter. The weight on her chest felt smaller.
"You'll be back tomorrow?"
Katie's voice was dry and raspy, but it got Sam's attention. He spun around just as Katie lifted her eyes to met hers. This time, she did see his lips twitch.
Katie hated reliving her pain and torture. She wouldn't wish it on anyone. But if that was what it took to get better, then that was what she'd do.
Katie just wanted to be better.
Katie was used to seeing just Sam, Bruce, and her father. Those were the only ones who stopped by. So far at least. So it became… routine to only spend time with those three. In fact, sometimes Katie forgot that, just outside her door, were Thor, Clint, Tony, and everyone else.
It was mid-afternoon. She'd already had one therapy session for the day, and it had been a good one - in Sam's eyes - therefore he said there was no need for an evening session. So Katie took this time to relax. She was curled up on the couch reading some book Sam gave her a few days ago. It was nice. To sit down and actually let go. To get lost in a book. It made Katie almost forget everything.
"Hi."
Katie's head snapped up and turned towards the door. Her heart actually stopped for a moment before picking up again as Natasha walked into the room.
Katie put down her book and slowly stood up. This was different. The only ones she'd talked to since she got here was Sam, Bruce, and her father. Sometimes JARVIS. But seeing her best friend standing just a few feet away from her for the first time in months, Katie had to take a few deep breaths to calm herself down.
"Hi." Natasha repeated as she walked closer into the room.
"Hi." Katie managed to get out, her voice dry and weak.
"How are you?" Natasha asked as she stopped in front of Katie, who nodded.
"Good. How are-"
Katie wasn't able to get the words out, however. Because the next thing she knew, Natasha had her arms around her, hugging her as tightly as she could.
This wasn't a side of Natasha Katie knew. Natasha wasn't the emotional one of the team, that was for sure. She kept everyone close to her heart, never showing how she actually felt. But nevertheless, Katie returned to hug with just as much force.
She was just glad to see her best friend again.
"Katie," Natasha pulled away, looking her in the eyes. "I'm sorry. I should have-"
"Tash." Katie could feel tears started to form in her eyes. "There' nothing you could have done. This wasn't your fault."
"If me and Steve got to you somehow…" Natasha started, but she stopped when she saw the look on Katie's face.
"Tash. Stop." The tears were flowing now, and Katie couldn't stop them.
"Right." Natasha cleared her throat. Silence fell around the two for a few moments as Katie wiped the tears from her face.
Natasha looked around the room for a few moments before turning back to Katie. "Is there anything you need?"
Katie could tell by the look on Natasha's face that this was her way of saying sorry. Helping Katie and getting her what she needed she Natasha's way of making up for what she did. And though Katie didn't want anything, she nodded.
"Some new clothes would be nice."
Natasha looked down at the yoga pants and oversized shirt Katie was wear and nodding.
"I'm on it."
Natasha looked up and gave Katie a smile, one that Katie couldn't help but return.
Katie never realized how much she'd taken hot showers for granted.
Before… everything that happened… Katie didn't like hot showers. Natasha always made fun of her for it, really. Well, more like teased her about it. Katie always took warm to cold showers. It was only when things were truly bugging her that Katie took hot ones.
Her water bill went up the month she found out her father was alive.
But now, all Katie took was hot showers. Every morning, she took a nice, relaxing, hot shower.
Her morning routine was, for the most part, the same as it had been for years. She'd wake up and head right to the bathroom, where she would shower and get dressed. Today, she dressed in a pair of black leggings and a nice yet comfortable top while she let her hair dry in its waves a few inches past her shoulders.
Katie then stopped in front of the mirror.
It had been almost two weeks since her and Sam started using exposure therapy, and Katie had to say, it really was working. After every session she always felt lighter, the weight on her mind and chest slowly getting smaller and smaller. Sam said she was making amazing progress. Katie could almost think about Strucker and List and everything they did without getting too overwhelmed. It was when she started thinking about Wanda and what she did that caused her to struggle.
Wanda played with her fears while Sam was telling her to overcome those fears. That was easier said than done.
However, Katie still couldn't help but notice how much better she looked all over. There was color to her face again. Her eyes weren't as dark and dull as they used to be. Besides the scars on her arms and stomach, if someone would see her walking down the street, they'd never know what she'd been through.
Katie sighed as she headed to the door that lead back into her room. She still had a long journey ahead of her. Once she got past all the therapy sessions, she had to get used to living life on her own again. Plus, she still couldn't even think about S.H.I.E.L.D. yet and what she was going to do about the Avengers.
Katie shook her head. She didn't want to think about any of that right now. She couldn't think about any of that right now. She didn't even know if she could throw a punch right now, let along fight some alien race or something.
"Hey,"
Katie looked up as she walked out of the bathroom and saw her father standing there. He was standing by the bed, dressing in a button down dark shirt and a pair of jeans.
"Hi. Going somewhere?" Katie smiled, referring to his outfit.
"No, not exactly," Steve let out a light laugh as her watched Katie climb onto the bed and cross her legs, "Do you know what today is?"
"Thursday?" Katie titled her head, a confused look on her face.
"Thanksgiving." Steve corrected her.
"Ohh." Katie nodded. How the hell was it already thanksgiving?
"Yeah," Steve said before changing the subject. "Sam said you've made really good progress."
Katie nodded her head. "Yeah. He left here yesterday saying how I made amazing progress. Better than anyone he's ever seen."
"Well, we were all talking last night," Steve walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, turning to face Katie. "And Sam and Bruce agreed that, if you want too, you can come see everyone today."
Katie's head snapped up towards her father, mouth opened slightly and eyes wide. She was finally able to see everyone again. Tony, Thor, Clint… Well, everyone besides Sam, Bruce, and her father. And Natasha.
"Spend Thanksgiving with everyone?" Katie finally managed to speak after a long few moments of shock and silence.
Steve nodded. "If you're up to it."
Katie met her father's eyes and she couldn't help but give him a small smile. She was finally going out of her room. She was going to see all her family again. Yes, it would be overwhelming at first. But Sam and Bruce would be there. Plus her father and Nat. All she had to do was remember her breathing and she should be good. Besides, if worse came to worse, Katie could always run back to her room.
"Yeah." Katie breathed as she smiled.
Steve sent her a wide smile before he stood up off the bed. Katie slowly followed his lead as she slid of the mattress before following him towards the door.
"If it gets too much, just let me or Sam know." Steve informed her, his hand on the doorknob.
Katie nodded. "I will, dad."
Steve smiled again as Katie said 'dad', just like he did every other time Katie called him dad this past month.
As Steve turned the knob and pushed the door open, Katie felt her mind starting to walk over time. She took deep breaths through her nose as they made their way down a hallway, past a number of other doors. The closer they got to the end of the hallway, the loud the chatter got. Katie could feel her body buzzing with different emotions.
All too soon, they were turning the corner and walked into the kitchen. Katie froze in the doorway as she looked around the room.
Pepper was standing by the oven, watching over everything on the stove, by the looks of it with the help of Bruce. Everyone else was standing round, drinks in hand as they talked and laughed with each other. Katie watched as Natasha smacked Clint's hand to stop him from eating some of the dessert on the counter.
It was only when they all noticed Katie standing there, playing with her finger nails, that they all went quiet.
Katie could hear her heart beating in her ears as she took a few deep breaths through her nose. Her eyes landed on Sam for a split moment and he gave her a nod and a small smile, slightly telling her that she could do this.
It was only when she heard Pepper call out her name did Katie look away and met Pepper's eyes.
"Katie," the woman smiled as she made her way over to Katie, pulling her in for a friendly hug. "It's good to see you."
"You too Pepper," Katie smiled, her voice not as weak sounding as she thought it'd be.
"It is most exciting to see you again, Lady Katherine," Thor smiled brightly as he pulled Katie into a hug also.
"Thank you, Thor." Katie smiled up at him. "And thank you for the flowers." Katie then looked around at everyone else in the room. "All of you."
"No sweat," Clint managed to get some dessert in his month without Natasha stopping him as he stepped forward. "I meant what I said on my card by the way. I expect a rematch."
The room went deadly quit again. Everyone looking at Katie as they waited for her to react. But she just cracked a small smile.
"I don't think it would be fair right now."
It sounded way to forced and unnatural coming from this version of Katie. And everyone in the room still remained silent as they waited. Luckily however, Clint let out a laugh which helped relieve the tension a bit.
"Guess we'll have to wait for you to bulk up some more." Clint teased as he walked towards Katie.
"I guess so," Katie said before stepping forward and giving Clint a hug. "Hi Clint."
"Hi Katie." Clint said softly. He hugged her for a long moment before pulling back, back straight as he looked over a Steve. "Want a beer?"
Steve nodded, stepping into the room. "Sure."
Everyone in the room went back to work and carried on with what they were doing after that. Katie moved out of the way and went to stand next to Natasha. She talked with her for a few moments before she noticed Tony looking at her. Their eyes met for a few moments before Tony looked around and silently left the room.
Katie narrowed her eyes slightly. She looked around and saw everyone seemed preoccupied with something so she slipped out of the kitchen and followed Tony into the living room, away from everyone else.
However, Katie froze as she saw the giant painting that was over the fireplace. The painting of all the Avengers standing side by side in their uniforms, smiling brightly and proudly. Katie's eyes moved over everyone before they landed on herself. Eyes shining bright. Her face holding so much laugher, a giant smile on her face as she stood in her Golden Girl uniform, her long blonde curls falling down like a waterfall.
Taking a deep breath, Katie moved forward towards Tony, who was standing in front of the fireplace with a drink in his hand.
Neither of them spoke for the longest time. So long in fact, that Katie was just about to leave and head back to the kitchen when Tony finally spoke up.
"Over a year ago, you helped me when I needed it most," Tony said. Katie slowly turned to looked at him, only to find him staring at his drink. "You helped me with my anxiety and PTSD when I needed it. But now, I don't know how to return the favor."
"Tony…" Katie started to speak, her voice weak. But Tony cut her off.
"I'm not good with this stuff, Katie." Tony turned to her. "I'm not good with making people feel better about serious situations like this."
"But you're good at being you." Katie cut in. "After everything you've been through, you still seem like the same Tony Stark."
Tony snorted before taking a long drink. "I'm not-"
"I know you're not. But you're good at making people think you are." Katie could feel the tears starting to form as she turned from Tony and looked up at the painting. "The Katie you first met, I spent years learning how to be independent and strong and… and like I didn't need a father. And just like that, she's gone." Katie stopped to take a breath. "I don't know how to be old Katie again. All I know is this new person that I've suddenly become."
"Is that really a bad thing?"
Katie looked away from the painting and over at Tony, who was watching her with slightly narrowed eyes.
"I'm still this Tony because that's all I've ever known. This is who I am." Tony explained. "But you, you've had years to be someone else. That old Katie, that wasn't really you. That was someone you wanted to be. Maybe, maybe this new person is the real Katie. Maybe this is the new Katie."
Katie couldn't help but let out a short laugh. "So the real Katie is someone who struggles with anxiety and PTSD."
"Maybe you need to overcome the anxiety and PTSD to become the new Katie."
Katie turned so she was facing Tony. "I thought you weren't good at this kind of stuff."
All Tony did was shrug. Katie couldn't stop the smile from starting to form on her lips as she stepped closer and pulled Tony in for a hug, one that only took him a few moments to respond to.
"Thanks Tony." Katie smiled slightly as the pulled away.
Katie watched as Tony's lips started to turn up into a smile. "Anything for my... cousin? Is that right?"
Katie couldn't help but laugh when they suddenly heard Pepper calling from the kitchen.
"Dinner's ready!"
Following Tony, Katie walked out into the kitchen and over to the nicely set table. She took her seat between Natasha and Steve as everyone else sat around the table.
For the first time in six months, they were all together again. The Avengers were a full team once more. Katie looked around and watched Tony and Clint tease each other and Bruce tried to calm them down. Thor and her father had their own secret competition to see who could eat more while Sam looked on in wonder. Natasha and Pepper chatted with each other about how stupid men could be. Katie finally felt that weight on her chest almost be non-existent. She felt lighter than she had ever felt better. And as Tony tried to drag her into his and Clint's disagreement, Katie could feel herself smiling as she rolled her eyes slightly before coming up with a little witty comment.
And for the first time since Katie got out of HYDRA's hands, as she could really feel herself getting better.
Hope you guys enjoy the long chapter!
I have a deal for you guys. The more reviews this chapter gets, the longer next chapter will be. How does that sound? Also, think we can reach 500 reviews by the time Part 3 starts in three weeks time? :)
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If we reach over 500 reviews by the time Prologue lll comes around on the 7th of October, I won't skip a week in between Prologue lll and the first chapter of part 3… Just saying…