A/N. Coffee, understanding and a deal. Post Season 2, Lyle and Feldt. Probably AU, but I don't care. Also, longest one-shot I've ever written.

Disclaimer: Don't own it. Never have, never will, just borrowing the characters.

Stargazing

Somewhere above him a bell chimed as Lyle stepped out of the cold and into the warm, bustling café. The entire place was full of people chatting, laughing and carefree, somewhere in the background a radio was playing outdated music and a couple of harried looking waitresses dashed between tables with well versed ease. The place hadn't changed at all in the time he had been away and he waved to the now rather older looking woman behind the counter as he began to duck and weave around the furniture and people in search of Feldt.

He had been more than a little surprised when the quiet young woman had approached him two days before his planned trip to Earth and asked if she could accompany him. His initial reaction had been to deny her, he knew he wasn't exactly her number one favourite person in the world, but something about the awkward silence that followed her request had stopped him. She must have had a damn good reason for asking him of all people, so he had shrugged and replied that he didn't see why not.

So now here he was hoping she had been able to follow his rather vague directions and made it to the café where they – or more he – had decided to meet. She had refused to visit the graveyard with him when he told her that morning where he was going. She had politely declined, saying she had work to do first. What the work was she did not offer an explanation for and he didn't want to push his luck asking. So he had left her with directions and his phone number should she find herself lost.

As it was he still nearly walked straight past her, not used to seeing her in civilian clothes. It threw him; he was still unconsciously on the lookout for the brightly coloured Celestial Being uniform she always wore.

"You should have come," he said, sitting down opposite her and taking off his hat and shades, dropping them on the table next to him and calling over one of the waitresses so he could order a drink and possibly something to eat. He had thought that was the reason for her visit in the first place.

"I told you, I had work to do." Feldt replied, staring out the window. "I'll go later."

"Do you know the way?"

"I can read a map."

So, no, she didn't know the way and maybe his directions had been just that bad. Lyle shook his head before switching on an easy smile when the waitress appeared, enquiring as to what he would like. He didn't need to think twice, knowing the menu couldn't have changed that much since last he was here; he ordered the house coffee and most unhealthy cake they had to offer. Feldt gave him a look, but refrained from commenting. He resisted the childish temptation to stick his tongue out at her, there were some days when he needed the sugar, and today just happened to be one of them.

Instead he took advantage of the fact she was paying him any attention and settled on, "Want anything?"

"The same again, please," she said, smiling politely as the waitress nodded and removed the empty mug.

The action drew Lyle's attention to something he hadn't noticed before, mostly because it had been tucked neatly between the mug and Feldt's crossed arms, out of his line of sight and he added, "She'll take the cake too, and I'm paying. No arguments."

The latter comment was directed more at Feldt than the waitress and she knew it, "I can pay for myself."

"Yes, I know, but I'm feeling nice, and that doesn't happen often, so make the most of it."

"Two double chocolate fudge, and two house coffees," the waitress checked. Lyle raised an eyebrow, but Feldt nodded, albeit a little reluctantly. "Okay, I'll be right back with your order."

"Didn't know you drank coffee," Lyle said in a conversational tone.

"Didn't know you had a sweet tooth," Feldt replied in like.

Lyle shrugged, "Next best thing to nicotine."

It wasn't quite the truth, but it wasn't a lie either as his eyes were drawn back to the envelope which was now in plain sight. It was addressed in Feldt's small, neat handwriting to his brother. She had started to write 'Lockon', but changed her mind half way through, crossed it out, and written more carefully underneath 'Neil'. It looked strange but he couldn't put his finger on exactly why. He had seen the name not half an hour earlier on the family gravestone, etched into the cold grey rock, but seeing it written in blue biro on white paper somehow seemed worse.

Maybe he was just getting sentimental in his old age, he snickered to himself.

Still, he drummed his fingers on the table, staring at the letter and wondering if he should say anything or just let it slide as he waited for the waitress to return. The trip thus far had gone better than he had expected given his past with the young tactical operator. She had still been courteous and polite since the incident in the hanger, but there was still always that distance that he had put in place. To her he was just another colleague, and as such he didn't want to push the boundaries too far and lose what small link did exist between them. She was sweet girl, and hardworking, and he respected that. It wasn't his place to question her. Some small part of his mind asked whose it was then, and was a little shocked to realise it was probably either Ian or Sumeragi, there was no one else she would be close enough to.

All in all he was glad when the waitress reappeared with a tray and bubbly smile to distract him from his thoughts. Once he might have flirted in a slightly outrageous fashion with the young woman, but not today, instead just smiling back and thanking her.

Turning back to the table he was surprised to find Feldt staring at him, a hint of a smile tugging at her lips, amused by some private joke.

"What?" He asked bluntly, picking up a fork and stabbing it into the top of his cake before pulling the plate closer.

She shook her head, reaching for the coffee first, still with that hint of a smile, "Nothing."

He didn't believe her, but nor had he expected her to elaborate.

"I was just remembering something Anew said once."

"Something good I hope," he replied, throwing on a fake grin and trying to ignore the flicker of pain he felt at hearing Anew's name. One day he'd get better, but not today, instead he was back acting and systematically pulling apart the cake on his plate.

"She said you were kind."

Okay, that hurt more than it should have, especially considering it was a compliment. Lyle stabbed his fork once again into the chocolate cake, hoping it was as good as he remembered, "Only when it suits me."

Feldt paused, and he wished she would stop staring, "No, it's more often than you think."

He also wished she wasn't so damn observant sometimes, and that she wouldn't find this fact apparently so funny. He also knew it was the instinct to recoil and get away as fast as possible that was making him think that way.

He was glad the cake was as good as he remembered. He needed it.

"What makes you say that?"

"You didn't say no to letting me come here for a start, you let me stay at your apartment, and have paid for every meal so far."

He didn't even realise he'd been doing it, let alone that she'd noticed. "I couldn't exactly throw you out on the street or let you starve." He waved his fork in the air and smirked. "For starters Tieria would have my hide for it regardless of his current state, and don't get me started on Sumeragi and Linda."

Laughter was something he rarely heard from the quiet young woman as she wrapped her hands around the warm mug, "See, you're doing it again."

This time he did stick his tongue out at her, as childish as it might have been, he really didn't care.

Then they were both laughing at the sheer absurdity of it all, and Lyle was grateful for it after the cold weather and quiet graveyard. Glad of the warmth offered by both the food and the company, forgetting for a moment why they were there and what they would be going back to, which was something, right now, he was more than happy to forget.

They spoke of meaningless matters, Feldt asking where the best shops were, and Lyle trying to drag up knowledge of the area long since buried under the vastly more important knowledge of where the best pubs were, knowledge which he was also more than willing to share yet she rolled her eyes at. He found she was fun to tease, and, when she wasn't being Feldt Grace: Celestial Being tactical operator and engineer, and was just being Feldt Grace, that she had an interesting sense of humour he was pretty certain she had learnt from Tieria. The change was astounding.

Yet throughout their mindless conversation he still picked up little things that made him sure she wasn't as relaxed as she seemed. The fact she was speaking so freely had been the first clue, she'd never volunteered such information before, even on the long trip down to earth. Secondly had been the way she kept twisting the mug in her hands, even after it was empty, and that sort of thing was usually a nervous habit. The drink itself was another, the coffee he could get, working long hours one often became reliant on caffeine, but he'd never seen her as the alcohol type, and the house coffee here certainly included that, it was one reason he was so fond of the place was that if you were old enough they would add whisky to the otherwise innocent looking mug of black coffee, and she hadn't blinked at it. All in all it was painting a very un-Feldt-like image superimposed over the still very-Feldt-like woman sitting opposite him and it was actually beginning to worry him.

He really was getting sentimental. Anew would have laughed at him, though good naturedly and with all the best intentions at heart.

He was just about to ask if everything was okay when she rose, picked up her bag and coat – the letter having disappeared when he wasn't looking – and dropped a few coins on the table, enough to cover both the drinks and cake. "Thank you," she said and then left, the bell above the door chiming on her way out, leaving Lyle momentarily confused and wondering what he had missed whilst arguing with himself.

Then his mind caught up with the times and promptly overtook them as he grabbed his hat and shades, threw down the money and hollered a quick 'keep the change' to the woman behind the counter, before taking off after the pink-haired young woman who was already halfway down the street. She walked too fast, always business, smart and crisp, but Lyle had caught her up before she reached the lights. He didn't need to ask where she was going, he knew.

She gave him another look, and he pointed down a different road to the one she was taking. "This way's faster unless you have car keys and a driver's license."

He turned and started walking, not looking back to see if Feldt would follow, he was pretty sure she would, knowing that he knew the area a lot better than she did, and he smiled slightly when he heard the sound of her boots on the pavement behind him.

"You don't have to come." She said, falling into step beside him, eyes on the road ahead.

Shrugging, Lyle replied lightly, "Don't have anything else to do, so I may as well play tour guide."

Again with the half truths, there were plenty of other things he could be doing, like paying off his bills and getting the direct debits redirected, not to mention having the Lancia seen to while he was here. It was a good little car but Neil had run the poor thing into the ground and it still ran a little strangely sometimes, but Lyle was loath to trade it in for something newer or better, no matter what anyone said about the old car, Lyle had grown to love it as much as his brother had.

They continued to walk in silence, Lyle watching the young woman out the corner of his eye. He'd put her wanting to come with him to Earth down to the fact she had wanted to visit his brother's grave, that had seemed normal enough given all he'd heard about the way he'd treated the rest of the crew and how much they had loved and respected him. However much it had annoyed Lyle the sheer mess Neil had left behind he had to give his brother some credit for everything he'd done. That much made sense and that was why Lyle hadn't complained about Feldt's presence. He'd half expected others to come as well when they heard that Feldt was going, but they hadn't, and Lyle was beginning to think he'd judged something in the whole situation wrong, that he'd missed something vastly important.

Unfortunately he did have an idea what it was, and it did not make him feel any better, in fact it made him feel worse. Hence the fact he was here now and not off toward the bank. He had started to put two and two together when he'd turned on the news and seen the Federation Assembly. He'd laughed when he saw Klaus and Shirin there. Shirin he knew had been involved in politics before, but Klaus in a suit had looked down right hilarious. Then the camera had spun round and he'd seen the people in the other benches and had stopped laughing and just stared in disbelief for at the screen, at the woman with lilac hair. Then he had realised what he was doing and had nearly thrown the remote through the screen in irritation at himself and the image of the woman who wasn't Anew. Instead he hit the off button, threw the remote aside and went in search of the wine he was sure he still had stashed in the back of one of the kitchen cupboards. Feldt had made him a coffee a couple of hours later. She had seen the news too and there was something in her eyes he hadn't wanted to admit was there: understanding.

He didn't want to admit it, as he passed through the gates to the graveyard again and slowed down, because of what it would mean, what the blue biro on white paper represented.

"Here," he said finally, stopping a ways back from the graves he had been staring at only a couple of hours before and let Feldt past.

Lyle watched as she pulled the white envelope from her bag, smoothing out probably non-existent creases, and knelt down to place it at the foot of the family gravestone. Feldt spoke quietly and more softly, gently than Lyle had ever heard. He was glad he couldn't quite tell what she was saying; he didn't think he'd want to know, and he was reminded of Tieria. Both were – or had been – right there within reach and real, and yet they were completely untouchable.

In his head he could hear Haro cheerfully exclaiming 'Feldt loves Lockon', the little orange robot childishly honest, not quite knowing perhaps what he was saying. He could also hear Anew's gentle laugh, again those words about understanding. Standing there just watching and listening he honestly could not deny that both were telling the truth and his heart went out to the quiet young woman, because he did understand.

"You're an idiot," he muttered, not quite sure if he was referring to himself, Neil or the young woman before him, probably all three.

"Did you say something?" Feldt asked, looking back over her shoulder at him. There were no tears in her eyes, but there was something else there, something all at once determined and raw.

"It's nothing," Lyle shook his head, she may have loved – and still love – his fool of a brother, but she was far from stuck in the past. She used it to her advantage, she turned sorrow into strength and he had to admire her for that. "You're a strong young woman."

"Lock-" there was a ghost of a smile as she paused and started again, "Neil once told me the same thing."

"Well, he was right about that," he offered a half-hearted smile in return. "And you can just call me Lyle if it makes it any easier."

He was a little surprised when she shook her head, "Lockon is your name as well."

He paused, taking in what her words meant. That she accepted him. "Thanks, Feldt."

"You're welcome," she replied, turning back to the grave to rearrange her letter so it sat a little neater before rising to her feet in one graceful movement.

He wondered what the hell his brother would have thought of the whole thing. What would he have thought of her now? There was no doubt the young woman, not a child anymore and maybe she never had been, was pretty and kind and strong and a good influence on those around her. He knew he couldn't answer that question though, and never would be able to, and it annoyed him, because Neil probably had no clue, sitting around on a cloud somewhere eating ice creams with Amy and laughing. Then he had to stifle a laugh of his own at the idea of Anew finding him in said afterlife and smacking the idiot upside the head. He could see her doing that as well. Hit him from me too, love, he thought as he stepped forward to stand beside Feldt, glaring shrewdly at his brother's name. He was probably going crazy, but if his dear older brother was up there watching, well, he'd give him something to watch.

"Neil," he began, ignoring the way Feldt's gaze snapped up to look at him. "I've got a deal for you, and I want you to listen real carefully." The vaguely sane part of his mind asked what the hell he thought he was doing conversing with a piece of rock again, but the less sane part of his mind just shrugged and ran with it. It seemed like a great idea right now, and probably still would after a few drinks later, maybe not come morning when he was trying to get all his work done with a hangover from hell, but for right now it was great because even dead his brother still needed a kick to the head to see what was right in front of him, and it was in Lyle's job description as the younger brother to be able to deliver said kick to the head. "I want you to keep an eye out for Anew for me since I can't from here and she's important to me, okay?"

"Lyle…?" Feldt asked carefully.

But Lyle just continued on cheerfully, hoping he didn't actually sound as manic as he thought he did, "And, in return, I'll keep an eye on this lovely young lady for you. Do we have a deal? That is," he gave Feldt a trademark grin, reminiscent the times in his childhood when he and Neil used to play stupid games and tricks on unsuspecting neighbours and relatives in those times when they had been getting along just fine, "if you don't mind?"

He could never and would never be Neil, and he knew that she knew that, but now he figured he understood her a little better. They had some strange common ground to stand on through the losses they had incurred, and he didn't know if anyone else on the ship could or would be able to understand in the same way. If things had been different, had played out like some child's fairy story then maybe…

Feldt smiled, and slowly nodded, "I think I like that idea."

Only this wasn't fairy story, because if it was then they'd all be alive and living like royalty.

"Good," Lyle replied, his hand closing around the lighter in his pocket. Pulling the small silver object out, he ran his fingers one last time over the engraving before putting it down beside Feldt's letter, directing his words once again to the gravestone and his brother. "We have a deal then."

Smirking, Lyle offered Feldt his arm in an overly grandiose fashion, and she laughed but took it anyway as they walk back into city, Lyle already trying to convince the young woman of the best place to go and eat that evening. He knew a great pub down the road that did proper, home-cooked food.

And already, as he looked up at the sky, and the stars somewhere beyond it, he could have sworn he heard the sound of someone being hit and the incredulous 'ouch' that accompanied it.

Lyle figured he was going crazy, but at least he knew no one was alone anymore, and that was more than enough for him.