A/N: Sorry for the late release I've been sick so nothing got done.
Miria's Happy Place
It had been two months since the incident. Two months of nothing but harsh training and chores. It had been two months since they had had any fun at all. It had been absolutely horrible nothing fun had happened, well except Helen's broken butt. It appeared when Miria had made good on her promise to kick the next person who talked to Pieta, Helen broke her butt. Whether it happened when Miria kicked Helen or on her landing wasn't really important. Upon her return she became the source of great amusement and Clare and Deneve nearly laughed themselves stupid when they heard. It was hard to tell who was more embarrassed though, Helen who had broken her butt or Cynthia who had to help Helen heal her broken butt. Helen became the source of a string of jokes from then on. She never found any of them funny however on the account that her butt was still sore. Now the two months were over and they all were determined to have some stupid fun to celebrate the end of their punishment. And that is how Miria found herself contemplating the meaning of her existence.
Miria had only left them for a couple of hours. What trouble could they possibly get into in two hours? Apparently a lot. When Miria returned she received the shock of her life. Somehow during her absence they had all gotten completely drunk and during their adventure had also managed to blow up the cave. Yes, the cave was completely gone. Their things were everywhere and all that remained of their former home were pieces of rock and a smoldering crater.
Miria: W-wh-wh-wh…
Helen: Oh, Look Miria's back! (Swaying slightly)
Clare: Miria! We had a party!!!
Miria: W-wh-wh-wh… (manages to point to the smoldering crater)
Tabitha: Oh yeah, it was blocking the view.
Cynthia: So I grabbed the huge cooking pot and made a super quadruple version of my super secret art craft! It went Boom!!! Mwahahahahahaha!!!!
Miria: C-c-c-c-c-c-c-ca-ve….ca-ve….cave…….
Yuma: MY LOYAL SUBJECTS! (Talking to a group of snow bunnies she made) THE TIME IS AT HAND! THE WORLD WILL BE OURS! WE WILL RULE WITH AN IRON FIST!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! LET US GO AND CONQUOR THOSE THAT OPPOSE US!!!!
Deneve: THIS TIME IT'LL WORK!!! I'LL DEFINATLY FLY THIS TIME!!! WHEEEEEE!!! I'M FLYING!!!!!
Deneve has a claymore in each hand and is flapping them like giant wings. She goes blazing through Yuma's snow bunnies.
Yuma: AGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY LOYAL SUBJECTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was then that it happened. Miria's mind shattered into little tiny pieces. The force of her mind breaking was so powerful that it sent a shock wave through the universe and for mysterious reasons immediately sobered her brain damaged charges.
Miria: ……………. Mmhmmmmmhmmmmmm………(Drooling)
Deneve: Uh oh…..
Clare: I-I think we finally went too far.
Tabitha: Uh…. Miria? (Waves into her empty eyes)
Miria: ………mwah….gah…….mhmm……mwah….
Helen: AGH!!! WE'VE REDUCED MIRIA TO A BABBLING IDIOT!!!! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!!!
Cynthia: This is your fault you know!!! If you hadn't been complaining about your sore butt then we wouldn't have wanted to cheer you up!!!!
Helen: My fault?! Who was the one who blew up the cave?!
Cynthia: WHAT?! WHO WAS THE ONE WHO TOLD ME TO BLOW IT UP IN THE FIRST PLACE?!
Helen: WHAT?! WHO WAS THE ONE WHO SAID THEY KNEW HOW TO BLOW UP STUFF?!
Cynthia: WHAT?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO HELPED ME!!!!!
Deneve: Ok, you two stop! I think Miria's condition is more important than whose fault it is. What are we going to do now?
Yuma: Hey! I think Miria's better now!
They all look at Miria. Miria starts to look around at them with slightly unfocused eyes.
Tabitha: Miria?
Miria:…………
Deneve: Do you know who we are?
Miria: …………..
Deneve: Ok… I take that as a no…. I'm Deneve…
Miria: Of course I know who you are!!! (Deneve: That good.) You're Yachiru!
Deneve: What?!
Miria: But Yachiru, why did you bleach your hair? Pink really was your color.
Deneve: P-p-pink?
Clare: Ahahahaha!!! That's awesome!
Miria: Oh…. Your name is Ed!!! Ed, what happened to your four legged shadow Ein?! Oh no!!! You lost Ein!!!
Clare: Ein?
Yuma: I think that's suppose to be Raki…
Miria: Oh… You're here too Mr. Soupy!
Yuma hangs her head in shame and Tabitha walks over to comfort her.
Miria: Gasp! It's Twenty Faces the phantom thief!!! Oh, it's so good to meet you!!! I'm so happy to see that you've eluded arrest so far, but that disguise is rather strange. Oh well, I guess if you're in hiding cross dressing isn't out of the question.
Tabitha: C-cross dressing?
Cynthia: Um… Deneve? I think I prefer the babbling like an idiot Miria. This one is really scary.
Miria: Big O lets go!!! (Miria jumps on Cynthia and they both fall. Cynthia is knocked unconscious.) Hmmm… You're not Big O. Who are you? Oh, I know you're Suzuka!!! I can tell because of your aversion to clothes!!!
Helen: Bwhahahahaha!!!
Miria: Why Sailor Stupid! What are you doing here?
Helen: S-sailor S-S-stupid?
Miria starts babbling about justice, love and other random things that make no sense.
Three hours later
Cynthia: (Regains consciousness) Ow ow ow… My head... What's Miria doing?
Deneve: I'm not completely sure, but she's been twirling and posing for the past three hours.
Miria: (Singing ending to Claymore) Kokoro mada anata no kioku no nake de Karada sagashiteru tarinai watashi wo Kyou mo dokoka de dareka ga nagasu namida Tsumetaku warai sadamete ikite yuku koto Nakusenai mono nigirishime nagara Watashi wa ima mo koko ni iru no Karenai hana wa utsukushikute Yuruginai omoi wo mune ni sakitsuzuketa Chigireta kumo no danzai no sora Tomaranai kanashimi wo dakishimeteta….
Clare: Oh yay, now she's singing! (wham!) Ouch!!!
Deneve: Shut up! If you have time to be sarcastic you have time to think of a way to bring her back to reality!
Miria: JUSTICE!!! MWAHAHAHA!!! IN THE NAME OF JUSTICE YOU WILL BE PUNISHED AND I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!
Miria grabs her claymore throws it on the ground and jumps on top of it. All the others can do is stare in shock as Miria uses her claymore as a modified snowboard and zooms down the mountain screaming about justice and whatever else she happened to be babbling about at the moment.
Deneve: Ack!!! Helen!!! You were supposed to be watching her!!!
Helen: What?! How was I supposed to know that she would do that! One minute she was twirling and singing and the next thing I know she's zooming down the mountain on her claymore! There is no way you can say this is my fault, Yachiru!
Yachiru (Deneve): Oh yes I can Sailor Stupid!!!
Yuma: Ummm…
Sailor Stupid (Helen): What is it Mr. Soupy?!
Mr. Soupy (Yuma): Well it's just that…. Miria's kinda really far away now. Don't you think someone should you know…. bring her back?
Sailor Stupid (Helen): Ed! Why are you doing nothing?!
Ed (Clare): I'm supposed to be thinking of ways to bring Miria back to the real world!
Sailor Stupid (Helen): ….. Big O-Suzuka!
Big O-Suzuka (Cynthia): My head still hurts.
Deneve: Allllright Twenty Faces-Tabitha- whoever you are, let's go bring her back.
Twenty Faces (Tabitha): But I don't want to go! She's scary!
Deneve: Don't be a baby. The rest of you come up with a good plan on how to get Miria back to normal.
Meanwhile…..
Miria: Chibi Chibi, what's the meaning of my existence? (Talking to her Claymore)
Chibi Chibi (Miria's Claymore): Snoopy.
Miria: Really?! Oh thank you Chibi Chibi! What's the meaning of justice?
Chibi Chibi (Miria's Claymore): When it rains upwards and a big black ball of doom descends on you bad things will come to pass.
Miria: Oh wow! Thank you Chibi Chibi! I've always wanted to know what the meaning of justice was! Oh no!!! I don't have anything to write the knowledge you have imparted to me on!!! How will I ever remember that the meaning of my existence is Snoopy and that justice is when it rains upwards and a big black ball of doom descends on you bad things will come to pass?!!!
Chibi Chibi: Don't worry you won't ever forget the meaning of your existence is Snoopy.
Miria: Really?! What about the meaning of justice?
Chibi Chibi: The meaning of justice is always changing. Tomorrow the meaning of justice will be a barrel full of half eaten apples.
Miria: Oh! That makes perfect sense!
Chibi Chibi: I know doesn't it?
Back at the smoldering crater
Yuma: Ummm… How are we going to bring Miria back to normal?
Helen: I don't know. Hit her with a bunch of snow balls?
Cynthia: You know that's what got us into this mess in the first place.
Helen: You guys are intent on blaming this whole thing on me aren't you?
Cynthia: Yes.
Helen: WHAT?! WHY?!
Cynthia: Because it's always your fault.
Yuma: Blaming Helen isn't going to bring Miria back, although it does make me feel better.
Helen: I GOING TO POUND YOU TWO!!!
Clare: I have an idea on how to bring Miria back.
Helen: What is it?
Clare: Hit her with a rock.
Cynthia: Try again.
Clare:……… Hit her head with a claymore?
Helen: That'll make it worse.
Yuma: I don't think Clare should be thinking. Bad things happen when she does.
In the middle of nowhere
Chibi Chibi: Now go Miria and vanquish the evil ones!!!
Miria: Yes Chibi Chibi! Die in the name of… WHEN IT RAINS UPWARDS AND A BIG BLACK BALL OF DOOM DECENDS ON YOU BAD THINGS WILL COME TO PASS!!! (GASP!!!) Chibi Chibi? Isn't there a shorter meaning of justice?
Chibi Chibi: Yes, three days from next Tuesday.
Miria: Oh, ok.
Chibi Chibi: Now go and defeat them in the name of Snoopy!
Miria: FOR SNOOPY!!!!
Miria runs forward and starts randomly swinging and slashing her claymore through imaginary enemies. Sometime during this episode Deneve and Tabitha appear.
Deneve: Wow… She's really lost it.
Tabitha: What is she doing?
Deneve: Looks like she's fighting imaginary people.
Tabitha: Right….. How are we going to bring her back without getting cut up into small unidentifiable pieces?
Deneve: ……….
Tabitha: YOU DON'T HAVE A PLAN?!!!!
Deneve: Ummm…… Not really….
Tabitha: BUT-BUT YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO BE SMART!!! I MEAN I WAS WORRIED ABOUT COMING AFTER HER, BUT I WAS COMFORTED BY THE FACT IT I WAS GOING WITH YOU AND NOT HELEN!!! NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT YOU'RE NOT THE SMART ONE OF THE BRAINLESS DUO?!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Deneve: Oh, come on don't be like that. I just have to have time to think of a plan and you're in luck. While you were ranting I came up with one.
Tabitha: Is it a good one?
Deneve: Do you want the truth or a comforting lie?
Tabitha: Truth.
Deneve: This is probably the worst plan ever. A four year old could have done better and there is a high possibility that we'll die.
Tabitha: ……… Comforting lie……
Deneve: This is the greatest and smartest plan in history and we will most defiantly not end up cut up into small unidentifiable pieces.
Tabitha: My life sucks…..
Deneve: Let's go!
Deneve grabs Tabitha's arm and starts to drag her to where Miria is slashing the imaginary enemies.
Tabitha: So what's the plan?
Deneve: We go up to her and tell her that we're being mercilessly attacked by very bad people and to please come and save us. (smile)
Tabitha: ………
Deneve: Miria!!!
Miria: Who are you!!!
Deneve: It's me, Dene-Yachiru. It's me Yachiru and Twenty Faces.
Miria: How do I know it's really you and not some evil impersonators?
Deneve: Ummm…… Because……I ………said so? (Tabitha smacks her forehead with her hand)
Miria: Why did your friend smack herself?
Deneve: Ummm…. Mosquito?
Miria: …………. Ok, Well I know how to tell if it's really you or not. Quick tell me the meaning of justice!
Deneve: Ummm… To protect the weak from really bad people?
Miria: NO! WHEN IT RAINS UPWARDS AND A BIG BLACK BALL OF DOOM DECENDS ON YOU BAD THINGS WILL COME TO PASS!!! (GASP!!!) Imposters!!!
Tabitha: ………We're going to die….
Deneve: Oh, sorry sorry. You see the two of us are so stupid that we really can't comprehend a concept like that!
Miria: ….Ok.
Meanwhile several big bad yoma appear. Miria notices them and turns to fight them.
Miria: BEGONE IN THE NAME OF… WHEN IT RAINS UPWARDS AND A BIG BLACK BALL OF DOOM DECENDS ON YOU BAD THINGS WILL COME TO PASS!!! (GASP!!!)
Chibi Chibi: No Miria, the meaning of justice has changed. It is now… If you hurt your violin, your violin teacher will hurt you.
Miria: FORGET WHAT I JUST SAID. THE MEANING OF JUSTICE HAS NOW CHANGED TO … IF YOU HURT YOUR VIOLIN, YOUR VIOLIN TEACHER WILL HURT YOU!!! SO BEGONE IN THE NAME OF… IF YOU HURT YOUR VIOLIN, YOUR VIOLIN TEACHER WILL HURT YOU!!!
Yoma 1: Yo! Crazy girl's friends! What's wrong with her?!
Deneve: Ummm….. nothing?
Tabitha: Can it get any worse?
Yoma 1: ….. No, I can defiantly tell that somethings …(Yoma 2: ARGH!!!!!!) (Yoma 2 is cut in half) HEY WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! WHY DID YOU KILL MY BEST BUDDY?!
Yoma 3: ARGH!!!!! THAT WAS MY ARM!!! NO, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!! (Head is cleaved)
Miria: EVIL DOER BEGONE!!!
She runs screaming and swinging her claymore at the yoma. He barely dodges losing his arm in the process. He screams in pain and swats Miria's claymore away from her.
Miria: NO!!! CHIBI CHIBI!!! (Miria's claymore flys high into the sky and falls to the ground with a thud)
Yoma 1: ARGH!!!!! MY ARM!!!! DIE!!!
Deneve slashes the yoma to pieces before it kills Miria.
Miria: NO!!! CHIBI CHIBI!!!!
Tabitha: Is she talking to her claymore?
Deneve: Yep.
Miria: CHIBI CHIBI YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME!!!
Chibi Chibi: It's ok Miria. I'll always be with…. you…. All you….. have to do….. is call me by…… my real…..name……
Miria: Your real name? Chibi Chibi, what's your real name?
Chibi Chibi: My….. real…. name….is……………………………………………………………………………..Ninny Fru Fru……..
Miria: Ninny Fru Fru?
Chibi Chibi: ….. Yes……….Ninny………..Fru………..Fru………………
Mira: NO!!!! DON'T GO NINNY FRU FRU!!!! COME BACK!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Tabitha: Ummm….. Miria, we can take Ninny Fru Fru back with us and maybe Cyn-ah- Big O-Suzuka can fix her.
Back to the smoldering crater
Miria: Well what's taking so long?
Cynthia: Uh…I don't know what to do.
Miria: Ninny Fru Fru………… You make Ninny Fru Fru better!!! (Grabs Cynthia's shirt) Make Ninny Fru Fru better!!! (Shakes her) Make Ninny Fru Fru better!!!
Cynthia: Ah!!! I'm sorry I don't know what to do! Please don't kill me!!!
Twack!
Deneve: Clare!!! Why did you hit Miria with that rock?!
Clare: She was about to kill Cynthia! I had to do something! Besides maybe this will make her better!
Miria: Ow! My head! What happened?
Yuma: Miria! You're back!!!!!!!! (Starts hugging her)
Miria: Agh!!! Get off!!! What's going on?! The last thing I remember is leaving all of you here… THE CAVE! YOU IDIOTS BLEW UP THE CAVE!
Helen: You know… I think I'm beginning to miss crazy Miria. (Smack!) Deneve! What was that for?!
Deneve: Shut up! This is your fault!!!
Helen: Why?
Deneve: Because I said so!!!
Their argument was cut short when Miria kicked Clare past them. They look up and immediately regret it because Miria has a look of pure murderous intent in her eyes. Deneve and Helen start to tremble in fear and look to Yuma, Cynthia, and Tabitha for help but find none, because Miria had apparently already knocked them out. Helen and Deneve run for their lives and almost escape Miria, but they trip and fall over some of the remnants of their former home. The next day Miria made Cynthia and Helen go look for a new home, while she made the others clean all of her things. Well, the end result of the whole unfortunate episode was that they were rendered temporarily homeless, bruised, and grounded indefinitely.
A/N: Yachiru is from bleach, Ed and Ein are from Cow Boy Bebop, Mr. Soupy was a Green Dragon costume in Scrapped Princess, Twenty Faces is from Daughter of Twenty Faces, Big O is from Big O, Suzuka is Tokko, and Sailor Stupid is an exaggerated modification of Sailor Moon, Chibi Chibi is also Sailor Moon.