A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and the continued following of this long story. As usual, thanks to my partner-in-crime, Betherdy Babe.

Swallowing, Rodney nodded and headed to the balcony while Richards remained behind him. Richards is armed for duty and going to the same meeting as Jennifer, he's never late for anything. Why would he take time to talk to me?

As Rodney stepped onto the balcony, he realized how high up in the tower the control room was. Oh, shit! He's going to throw me off the balcony. Why can't I stop kissing her in public places?

"Doctor McKay, I wanna talk to you about Doctor Keller," the big man said in a quiet voice.

Oh no! I knew it! He's always with her, I knew he liked her. Rodney looked up at the Marine and began to babble. "Listen, I don't know wh-what your perceived relationship is with Jennifer, but… well, she's an adult and… um… well, I'm an adult and what we… I mean…"

"Doctor McKay, if I was concerned about your intentions with Doctor Keller, we would not be having a conversation," Richards said with no humor in his voice. His eyebrows rose slightly as he glanced at the railing and back to the physicist. "Your relationship is not my concern unless you hurt her. Then, you and I will have a problem." Richard's grey eyes narrowed slightly and he spoke with that voice of his that ran fear into the hearts of anyone who heard it.

"I can assure you that I'd never hurt her or let anyone else for that matter," Rodney snapped, finally finding his strength. Keeping Jennifer safe was important to him and if anyone questioned that, it pissed him off.

"That's the reason we're talking," Richards said with a slight upturn of his lips.

"Okay. So what did you want to ask about Jennifer?" Rodney said as he crossed his arms and cocked his head.

"Things are gonna get dangerous around here when the Wraith attack and we both know a battleground is no place for Doctor Keller," Richards said, staring into Rodney's eyes.

"Of course not," Rodney exclaimed. "She'll be at the Alpha site." He's trying to tell me something and I suck at figuring these things out.

"But she'll want to be here with those of us who will be the last to go. Especially after all that happened the last time she went off world," Richards said with a knowing look. "I need you to make sure she goes to the Alpha site. She'll listen to you."

Rodney wondered why Richards was so protective of Jennifer. The man protected all the civilians because it was his job, but his desire to protect Jennifer rivaled Rodney's at times. Maybe he likes her but knows it could never be. "Absolutely."

"Thank you, Doctor McKay, and good luck," Richards said nodding. "I know you'll come up with something." Gunny shook Rodney's hand.

"Uh…" Rodney was stunned as he shook Richard's hand. A battle-hardened man like Richards has faith in me. Rodney McKay never held a gun before joining this expedition, but he gained the faith of someone of Gunny's caliber. Wow. Smiling a true, sincere smile, Rodney said, "Thank you, Sergeant, and good luck yourself."

Rodney spent hours working on calculations to route power through the naquadah generators and then running computer simulations with Radek. Taking a break while Radek readied a jumper for a live simulation, he returned to his lab. Rodney sat heavily onto a chair, letting out a sigh and stared at his computer. What would I possibly say to Jeannie?

He had a falling out with his sister several years ago and had not spoken to her or about her since. They used to be close, well, as close as two highly competitive, genius math whiz kids could be. Who are you kidding? You and Jeannie were never close. But, she is the only family I have.

"Not to mention all the wisdom I have to share," he smiled as he spoke Jennifer's words aloud. Deciding he did have something to say after all, he dug out a camera, found a clean uniform jacket in his office, even pulling on a Tac vest to look official, and set up the video recording.

After jotting down some notes on index cards, he was ready to start. Smoothing his hair, he stood in front of the tripod and held up his left hand with his fingers extended to count them down, "Right. And in five, four, three…" He stopped speaking and held up two fingers, folded his arms and looked serious. "This is Doctor Rodney McKay speaking to you from my base of operations in the lost city of Atlantis, located deep," he paused and gestured dramatically, "within the Pegasus galaxy. I record this message on the eve of our darkest hour. As I speak, an alien armada of biblical proportions is on its way; bent ... dare I say hell-bent, in keeping with the metaphor, on our destruction. We will do our best to stave off their attack but I am afraid that defeat is all but inevitable. I, and the other members of my team, face the most horrific deaths imaginable, as our very lives are sucked from our chests in a, in a, horrific... Okay, uh, starting again, starting again."

Rodney looked around the lab. Talking about horrific death at the hands of the Wraith reminded him of Jennifer's attack and he needed to stop speaking for a moment. A fine layer of perspiration formed on his upper lip and he felt his stomach squirm. Better not to think about death. You know you're not going to die. You might be stranded in Pegasus for years, but you won't die here.

The physicist restarted the camera with his desire to share his ideas with the world pushing him to continue. "And in five, four, three… My friends. I'm Doctor Rodney McKay of the Atlantis expedition, and as the facts of our heroic struggle against the Wraith and our untimely demise are already known to you, in that light, I'd like to pass along some final thoughts. Now, my extensive education, training and first-hand experience in the field of astrophysics has given me a unique perspective that few on Earth or, uh, well, on any other planet for that matter, can match. I'd like to take a few moments now to… uh… pass along that perspective to you. I'll begin with, um…" he paused to pick up some cards, "a few observations on a subject that is both near and dear to my heart: leadership."

Rodney got lost once again in his train of thought when he mentioned how a leader should be extremely confident. Jennifer's never confident, but everyone follows her almost blindly. At least the soldiers do. Probably because they hope to get lucky. The idea that men on the base thought about Jennifer in a sexual way caused him to feel a flash of anger. Knowing what he knew about her inexperience, he was even more jealous than before. Can't believe I was her first kiss. A grin spread over his face as his mind wandered back to his own first kiss at fifteen, which got him babbling.

"I caught mono kissing a girl in Algebra Club. Missed an entire month of school." Rodney chuckled as he thought about his classmate. "Still, the kiss was, uh, somethin', so it was, uh, probably worth it. April Bingham, cute blonde! God, you see, I love blondes, especially with the, uh, the short hair." He smiled and then thought of the last shorthaired blond to occupy his dreams, what felt like a lifetime ago. "Samantha Carter, if you're watching. Well, I hope you're watching because that means you broke the encryption. I knew you would. You know… you should know that I think you are just... so... well… you're great, you're really, really great, and, uh, I enjoyed working with you over the years." Rodney smiled as he thought of the interactions with the Lieutenant Colonel. His mind then drifted to a longhaired blond and all the women of his past faded from his thoughts. Suddenly, feeling a bit like he was cheating on someone, he got back to his previous train of thought. "And let's get back to, uh..." he paused to clear his throat and folded his arms once again, "leadership."

As Rodney discussed how to lead a team, his mind wandered to the last conversation his team had before all hell broke loose. Along with Jennifer and Peter, they spoke about similarities between humans in Pegasus and on Earth. Ford commented that no one seemed to have pets in Pegasus. Teyla mentioned some people do keep small, domesticated animals, but not frequently. Rodney had been surprised when Jennifer mentioned a dog she had when she was a kid. It was a keeshond, like he took in for a brief time.

"Never cared for dogs: too much work, too needy, too unpredictable. I mean, you leave one door open, the tiniest little cracks, and they're gone. You look for them, you put up fliers, and it's no use. And since your father refused to pay for a license, the Animal Shelter has no way of tracking them. Y'know, God knows what happened to that little guy." Rodney sighed and tried to forget about that horrible summer when he was eight. "Now cats, now that's a whole different story. Cats are self-sufficient, they're dependable; you shake the box, they come running. Cynics, like Jennifer, would say it's because of the food but my cat... see, I truly believe he enjoys my company. There's something very comforting about coming home from work at the end of the day and having a familiar face waiting for you, you know?" As soon as he said the words, Rodney did not see his cat, only a smiling blond woman holding a small baby in her arms. Shaking his head and looking for his note cards, he continued. "Still, I digress. Where was I? Uh, right. Leadership."

Rodney finally gave up on leadership, but nothing else came to mind that was important to say. All he could think about was all that he was never going to get to do. "That's another sight I'll die without having seen. See, to be fair, when you've travelled as much as I've travelled, you'd think that missing Niagara Falls would be no big deal, but you know what? It gnaws at you. A lot of movies I wish I'd seen and won't see now. Never saw Grease, even though I had a thing for Olivia Newton John when I was a kid. Always wanted to see Ghandi; only saw the first half of The Sixth Sense always wondered how that ended. I know Jennifer has Grease, so I really have no excuse not to watch it except that it's bad to drool over an actress while on a date…" Rodney stopped as he thought of dating Jennifer. Now we'll never get the chance to. At least she'll get to say goodbye to her dad. His eyes widened as he thought of Jennifer's suggestion. "My sister. Jeannie? This is your brother, Rodney... obviously. I wanna s-say, um... I wanna say something. Uh... family is important. I-I've come to realize that because the people here have become a sort of a... kind of a surrogate family to me." Rodney could not help but smile as he thought about everyone on Atlantis. "Now, I know what you're thinking: I've never really been the poster child for that kind of sentiment but, uh, when... when one's contemplating ones own demise, one tends to see things more clearly. I really do wish you the best, you know, and I'm sorry we weren't closer. Perhaps, um... if by chance I make it out of this, perhaps one day we can be, and I would like that. Uh…Jeannie, I…" Rodney paused again. I'll be dead when she gets this. "Listen, I need you to find someone for me. His name is Robert Keller and he lives in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. I… His… Um, I was supposed to watch over his daughter and… well… obviously due to circumstances beyond my control, we… We're all probably dead so I failed. Tell him I'm sorry I didn't save Jennifer. Tell him I would never have gotten through this without her. She's smart and the most amazing woman that I ever met."

The tape ran out as Rodney stopped speaking. As he imagined what his life would be like without Jennifer, tightness formed in his chest making it difficult to breathe. Don't know how I'd live if something ever happened to her.

A call from Radek telling him that the Czech was ready in one of the jumpers to run a simulation pulled him out of his depressing thoughts. He shut down the video and took the tape with him to add to Ford's recordings.

Rodney and Radek ran a successful simulation, so Rodney had time to grab a bite to eat before he spliced all the tapes together and compressed the file. Ford said that he filled his tapes, so Rodney would need a little while to compress hours of video and audio. Might as well have a full stomach to work on.

As Rodney entered the mess hall, he noticed for the first time that it was getting dark outside. Wow, all day for taping and running the simulation, no wonder I'm starving. Glancing around, he didn't see anyone in the mess hall. Grabbing some food and preparing to return to his lab, he thought he heard sniffling. Walking around the corner to the patio area, he found a sight the caused all thought of food to leave his brain.

"Jennifer? What's wrong?" he asked, practically throwing his tray on a table and rushing over to put an arm around her shoulders.

"I missed the taping. One of Bates' men got injured off world looking at Alpha sites and I was on duty. It took a couple of hours to identify the toxin from the bug that bit him and then to stabilize him. By the time I found Ford, he said he filled the tapes," Jennifer swiped at her eyes with her sleeve. "I won't get to record a message to my dad. I…"

"Hey, don't get upset. I've got a camera in my lab. I recorded my own message, so you can too. You've got plenty of time to do it. We won't try the dial out for a few more hours. Not until Sheppard gets back," Rodney said smiling and stroking her arm. This was a problem he could easily fix and it gave him immense pride when she finally smiled at him.

"There's still room for more data? Are you sure?" Jennifer asked with eyebrows raised.

"I'll make room so you can talk to your dad for as long as you want," Rodney grinned.

"Thank you, Rodney," Jennifer threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly.

Realizing that they were on a balcony outside the mess hall and that people walked by all the time, he finally reined himself in and only squeezed her with one arm before moving away. "Let's get some food and you can tape in my lab."

"Uh, okay," Jennifer said, looking shyly away.

"Is something wrong?" Rodney asked.

"No, I… I just… well, I didn't want everyone to hear what I had to say," she said finally looking him in the eyes.

"Oh," Rodney said. I wonder if she'll mention anything to her dad about me. Where the hell did that thought come from? "You can use my office, then."

"Are you sure? I know…"

"Jennifer, I did this so you could talk to your dad, so let's grab some food and get back to the lab," he said as he picked up his tray. For about the tenth time, if he'd been counting, Jennifer stood staring at him while he walked away. "What?"

Jennifer smiled her killer smile as he called it, the one that sent a shaft of joy through his heart. It began with her lips that just begged to be kissed and spread throughout her pixie-face to those perfect light chocolate-brown eyes. Feeling weak in the knees, he smiled back at her with a dopey grin. "Jennifer, is something wrong?"

"No, Rodney. Nothing's wrong," she smiled some more and linked her arm through his at the elbow. "Things couldn't be better."

Furrowing his brow, he allowed her to tug him back into the mess hall. I will never understand women or this one in particular if I spend the rest of my life trying.

"Hi Dad," Jennifer said with a smile, but when she remembered exactly what she was doing, the smile faded. "If you're watching this, I… I'm not coming home. I'm so sorry to leave you alone."

She paused and looked directly into the camera. "I want to thank you though for making me come with Rodney and Carson. Coming here has been the best thing I've ever done. I've seen and done so much that I could never tell you about if…" she paused and took a deep breath, "I'm trying hard not to cry and have been making a fool of myself lately because I can't stop… I couldn't tell you all I've seen and experienced if we had a hundred years."

Jennifer's voice broke a few times and she had to stop and rerecord several parts, but she persevered. "I finally found a place I belong and people who care about me. I wouldn't trade that for anything…"

"Doctor Keller," Chuck's voice sounded in her earwig.

"What?" she snapped angrily, as she shut off the recording once again.

At this rate, I'll never be done.

"Major Sheppard and Teyla returned with survivors from a culling and we need all medical personal to screen them," Chuck added sounding unfazed by her snapping.

"Sorry, Chuck. I'm on my way," Jennifer jumped up and went to leave. "Oh, the tape." She pulled it out of the camera. I have so much more to tell Dad, but the important parts are here already. Besides, this is not going to be goodbye, Rodney is smarter than the Wraith and probably most of the Ancients too; he'll get us home.

TBC

A/N: I had to put all of Rodney's rantings in here at the request of a fan. He does go all over the place with them, so I got quite the workout trying to connect them. Hope you enjoyed, please review and let me know.