DISCLAIMER: I own nothing

Chapter 26: Little Moments

Counselling Session, February, 1949

When Elphaba walked into Dr Palloa's office one Wednesday afternoon in February, Fiyero right behind her, the first thing that caught her attention was the papers lying on the coffee table. Usually it was bare, save for a box of tissues.

"Good afternoon," Dr Palloa greeted them.

"Good afternoon," Elphaba said, slowly stepping into the room and over to the couch.

"Would you like something to drink? Tea, coffee, water?"

"Coffee," Elphaba said immediately.

The papers on the table could only mean something that was going to make her head hurt. Coffee could only help.

"Coffee would be great, thanks," Fiyero agreed.

Dr Palloa got them their coffee and then settled in his chair opposite them.

"It's Valentine's Day next week," he began.

Elphaba's eyes narrowed slightly. "It is," she said warily. "Also known as a Monday."

"We don't really do Valentine's Day," Fiyero explained.

Dr Palloa smiled. "I guessed that much," he said, chuckling over Elphaba's answer. "Nevertheless, I thought in light of the occasion, we'd play some games this session."

Elphaba's eyebrow rose. "Games?" she said in distaste.

Fiyero didn't look remarkably impressed either.

"What kind of games?" he asked, placing his coffee cup on the table.

He had horrible visions of having to play at role reversal.

"Nothing too horrendible," Dr Palloa reassured them, chuckling. "Perhaps 'exercises' is a better word. But I'd like to expand on the idea of helping the two of you get to know one another again."

He expected further protest from them. But Fiyero only looked to Elphaba, who sighed and shrugged.

"Alright. Fine. What do we do?"

Dr Palloa smiled. "Very good. The first thing I'd like you both to do, is think of a fun fact. Something that the other doesn't know about you."

Elphaba frowned deeply, while Fiyero looked thoughtful. Dr Palloa just sat back and waited.

"I've got something," Fiyero broke the silence first.

Elphaba turned to him, and was surprised to find him looking oddly sheepish. She wondered if this was going to be something she wanted to know.

"When I was a kid," he began. "Like, about Cale's age, I thought it would be super cool… to be a mail man when I grew up."

There was a moment of awkward silence following his announcement… and then Elphaba snorted. She couldn't help herself.

She descended into a fit of laughter, which Fiyero bore stoically, waiting patiently for her to calm herself. It took longer than he thought was really necessary.

"Are you telling me," Elphaba gasped between giggles. "That when we came here, and you started looking for work, you gave up your lifelong dream of being a mail man to be a carpenter?!"

Fiyero rolled his eyes. "Yes, alright," he said. "Someone has to work at the post office, you know. Deliver the mail. It's a respectable job…"

"Sure," Elphaba agreed, trying to catch her breath. "I'm not saying it isn't. But… 'super cool'? Why?"

Fiyero shrugged. "I don't know. I think I thought I'd get to read everyone's letters and stuff."

Elphaba just laughed again.

"Do you have something, Elphaba?" Dr Palloa asked eventually, once she'd calmed down, trying to get them back on track.

Elphaba had been contemplating a few half-thoughts before Fiyero's revelation, but she was unsure what Dr Palloa was asking for and how to respond.

"Well… I can play piano?" she said tentatively.

Fiyero turned so fast he cricked his neck. "You what?" he demanded, rubbing his neck.

"I can play piano. Well, I could. I used to. I don't know if I still would be able to," she said practically.

"Your father let you have piano lessons?" Dr Palloa asked, a little surprised, given everything he'd learned about Elphaba's childhood and her father.

"No…" Elphaba answered. "But we had a piano. I just… learned."

Fiyero was staring at her dumbfounded. "You're self-taught," he said in awe.

"Just a few songs," Elphaba waved him off.

"How old were you when you learned?" Dr Palloa asked.

Elphaba bit her lip. "Like… eight? Nine, maybe? It was something my father could tote out at dinner parties, you know? Get me to play something after dinner. Show I wasn't a complete waste of space. 'She may be green, but look, she can play piano.' I hated it."

"Why hadn't you said anything about this before?" Dr Palloa asked her.

"Well, because there wasn't any point. We didn't have a piano, and I knew that if I mentioned I could play, Fiyero would-"

"We should get a piano!" Fiyero interjected vehemently.

"-Say something like that," Elphaba rolled her eyes. "Fiyero, there's no space or money for a piano. And I don't have the time or the inclination to play anymore… and you're not even listening to me, are you? You're trying to think where you can buy a piano," she accused him.

She wasn't entirely wrong.

"Maybe I could build a piano…?" Fiyero mused distantly. "Is it hard?"

Elphaba rolled her eyes. "Yes," she snapped.

She turned to Dr Palloa. "He refuses to be practical," she said flatly.

"Fiyero, I think Elphaba may have a point here," Dr Palloa told him.

Fiyero reluctantly conceded defeat. "I just- I'd like to hear you play," he said to Elphaba apologetically.

"It's been ten years. I doubt I could manage more than a few scales," Elphaba reasoned. "And… I learned, well, because I could. I think I was bored. But then it was something that my father used to his advantage because it was useful to him and his image. Same as everything else in my life. It stopped being anything I really enjoyed."

Fiyero hadn't thought about that perspective.

"I'm sorry, Fae," he said quietly.

She shrugged. "It's fine. And you know now."

It hadn't gone quite the way Dr Palloa had expected, but it hadn't gone terribly either.

"Alright. Well, thank you both for contributing. Next, I'd like you to each take one of these worksheets and a pen."

"Man, I feel like I'm back in school," Fiyero complained as he reached forward.

Elphaba smiled slightly, but said nothing.

"Now," Dr Palloa cleared his throat. "When relationships become difficult, we tend to overlook our partner's best qualities. We forget why we loved them in the first place. This worksheet will help you put focus on the things that initially drew you to one another."

Elphaba bit her lip as she stared at the worksheet. It was divided into four sections, each with a different heading.

The qualities that initially attracted me to my partner were:

My favourite memories with my partner have been:

My partner shows me appreciation by:

I value my partner because:

Each section had three blank lines underneath it.

"I'd like you both to take a few minutes and fill out the sheets. Then, I'd like you to share your answers with one another," the Peacock told them. "If you're feeling a little stuck, there's a list of examples on the back. I'll give you some time."

He watched them furtively as they filled in their sheets. Elphaba's eyes never left her paper, frowning deeply and alternatively chewing on her bottom lip and the end of her pen, as though she were in the middle of an exam. Which, Dr Palloa realised, she quite possibly saw this as.

"Elphaba," he said gently.

Her head rose quickly, her eyes widening.

"This isn't an exam. There's no right or wrong answer," he reminded her.

Elphaba smiled weakly and she nodded, lowering her eyes back to her paper.

Meanwhile, Fiyero was staring distantly at the wall, tapping his pencil against the arm of the couch when he wasn't writing.

It was these moments Dr Palloa was always glad he'd never become a teacher. It would drive him crazy to watch students complete their exams.

"Alright," he said finally, drawing their attention back to him. "Who'd like to go first? Any volunteers?"

Now Fiyero really did feel like he was back in school. He never would have been the first to volunteer in a classroom, but here… well, Elphaba was positively radiating tension.

"I'll go," he offered.

"Excellent. Let's start with the first question. Three qualities that attracted you to Elphaba?"

Fiyero frowned slightly. "It was hard to know where to count from. There was about a month between when we met and when… everything changed."

"That's fine."

"Ok, well. I had boldness, determination and compassion."

Dr Palloa nodded and made a note. "Would you like to expand on any of those? Elphaba, do you have any questions?"

"Bold," Elphaba said, staring at the paper in Fiyero's hand.

"I debated with the wording of that one," Fiyero admitted. "Boldness, fierceness, bravery. Any of them would have worked. And there were a few moments that I could use as an example. But nothing fits better than that day with the Lion Cub."

Fiyero flipped over his sheet to the list of examples on the back.

"'Boldness- Confidence that what you have to say or do is true, right, and just'. You never do anything without believing it's for the right reasons," Fiyero told her. "You always have. And you're always right."

Elphaba gave a small smile in return.

"Elphaba? What did you write?"

"Joyfulness, charismatic-"

"Wait," Fiyero interrupted. "You found that attractive?!"

"Well, actually I found that really irritating," Elphaba admitted and Fiyero grinned.

That was more likely.

"But," she added slowly. "The joyful thing… it was more happiness than I'd ever been around. And for a moment, it was nice to have someone be that positive all the time. Until the moment I realised a lot of it was fake. But even then, you were still… annoyingly optimistic."

Fiyero wondered whether she still saw that as an attractive quality.

"And the third quality?" Dr Palloa asked her.

Elphaba paused. "I don't know how to word it," she confessed. "I'm not sure if it can be summed up in a single quality."

"Try and explain it."

Elphaba bit her lip. "That moment when I realised there was more to him that what he showed to the world. I don't think it was a quality, it was just… something in him that I recognised."

She and Fiyero exchanged a glance.

Dr Palloa made another note.

"What about the next section? Fiyero, could you share a favourite moment of your relationship with Elphaba?"

Fiyero cleared his throat, feeling a little awkward. "The first one I thought of… well, it was right after Elphaba turned me human again. It was the first morning we got to wake up in the same bed."

Elphaba's cheeks were flushed slightly as Fiyero turned to her.

"I woke up before you," he recalled. "And I just… lay there for a bit. Watching you sleep. And then you stirred a bit, and moved closer. And I remember thinking 'This. This is a perfect moment'."

Elphaba's sheet of paper was resting on her knees, but she didn't so much as glance at it. She'd turned herself to almost sit sideways on the couch, facing Fiyero.

"Do you remember the night," she said. "We'd only just moved into the cottage- we didn't even have any furniture yet. There was just that old mattress on the floor. And that first night, I couldn't sleep."

"I remember," Fiyero said softly.

"You sat with me, and talked to me in Quoxian until I fell asleep."

Fiyero tried to shrug it off. "I was made of straw. I didn't need to sleep. You did."

It had also been the best way to learn the language. Fiyero had learned some as a child (his parents arguing it was a good skill to learn another language) but hadn't really used it in years; while Elphaba had picked up a bit while on the run, but neither had been fluent.

He slowly reached for her hand. "Do you know what I miss the most?"

Elphaba's eyebrow lifted ever so slightly. "If you say what I think you're going to say…" she said warningly.

They'd spoken of many things in this room, and although she knew it was a safe space, she drew the line at discussing their sex life.

Fiyero grinned. "I wasn't going to say that, but you're not wrong."

She chuckled. "Then what?"

"I miss… just being able to look at you and know exactly what you were thinking. There's times now when I get it, but a lot of the time, you're just so far away. And I miss it. I miss you."

Elphaba didn't know what to say to that.

"What makes you work as a couple?" Dr Palloa asked them. "A lot of couples in your circumstances would not have made it ten years. I'm curious as to why you think you have."

"Well, we love each other," Fiyero said immediately.

"And look where that's led us," Elphaba muttered under her breath.

Both Fiyero and Dr Palloa ignored her.

"A person can't survive on bread and butter alone, Fiyero," the Peacock said gently. "No couple gets very far without love in the mix. What else?"

Fiyero frowned thoughtfully. "I think we both know each other better than we do ourselves," he said slowly. "I know for a fact, no one understands me better than Elphaba does."

"Is that true for you too, Elphaba? Does Fiyero know you best?"

"Yes," she said slowly. "He does."

Fiyero's frown deepened. "What's with that face?"

"What face?"

"You look sad," Fiyero noted.

Elphaba shook her head. "I was just thinking."

"About?"

Elphaba faltered. "I always thought," she finally replied. "I've always thought that we worked because- because we complemented one another. That we were different enough to balance out."

"Like a scale?" Fiyero said tentatively, and Elphaba nodded with a faint smile.

"Kind of, yeah."

"OK. And this makes you sad because…?" Fiyero prodded.

The faint smile faded away quickly.

"Because what if that's why we're not working anymore?" she asked fearfully. "What if we're too different? And that's stopped being a good thing?"

"Then the scale is out of balance, and we readjust," Fiyero shrugged.

Exasperation flickered across Elphaba's face, and Fiyero squeezed her hand.

"Listen, I know what you're going to say. You're going to say that I'm not being realistic and it can't be that simple. But I'm telling you that it is, Fae."

"How?"

"Because I love you, Elphaba. There was a time, not that long ago, when I'd see you only braiding your hair or watching the kids sleep, and I'd fall in love with you all over again. And I don't know when or why I stopped. Whether I stopped looking, or I just took you for granted, I don't know. Either way, I'm sorry. But I can fix that."

He looked at her earnestly. "Haven't we been doing better since the New Year?" he asked her.

Elphaba nodded, unable to argue with that.

"This might be a good time to complete the next worksheet," Dr Palloa interrupted quietly.

"But we didn't finish going through the first one," Fiyero reminded him.

Dr Palloa held up a wing. "It's fine, Fiyero. We can come back to it later if there's time."

He reached forward and handed them the next worksheet, one between them.

"Relationship Building," Fiyero read aloud.

"Couples often fixate on the heavy topics that pull them apart," Dr Palloa explained. "Which means, you forget about the strengths that brought you together in the first place."

Like the first worksheet, it was divided into several sections, each with three blank lines beneath the subheadings.

"I'd like you to work together to complete this worksheet. So, if you look at the first section: 'As a couple, we're good at.' What would you say are the strengths in your relationship?"

Elphaba spoke hesitantly. "I think… we're good at teamwork," she replied, glancing to Fiyero. "Even at our worst, I think we've always worked well together in terms of parenting."

Fiyero nodded in agreement. "I think we've also been good at encouraging one another. Supporting each other with our decisions."

Elphaba thought about everything he'd done to help her open Chapter Two, and agreed.

"And a third?"

"I'm going to say the fact that we love one another is a strength," Fiyero said stubbornly. "Don't look at me like that, Fae. Maybe things aren't perfect right now, but we're here, aren't we? My love for you got me through those two years we were apart. You're not going to convince me that isn't a strength. Not today, not ever."

He stared Elphaba down, daring her to argue with him on that point. Elphaba, however, merely smiled softly.

"OK," she said and reached for her coffee cup.

Fiyero looked surprised, and then smug, pleased with his victory.

"What about weaknesses?" Dr Palloa asked them, gesturing to the next subheading.

"Stubbornness," Elphaba responded without hesitation. There was a dry note to her tone, but her face was solemn. "We both like to be right."

"But we're good at compromising," Fiyero pointed out to her. "Or, we used to be," he amended.

"Nevertheless, let's put it down," Dr Palloa said. "Fiyero, what do you think? A weakness?"

Fiyero grimaced slightly. "I guess, if I've learned anything in these sessions, it's that we're not as good as communicating as I thought," he said, sitting forward and frowning at the ground.

The idea that Elphaba didn't trust him and hadn't confided in him about things, still didn't sit well with him. He hated it.

Elphaba winced slightly.

"I've learned that we stopped prioritising each other," she said quietly. "I don't know how you'd want to word that exactly, but I think that should be the third weakness."

Fiyero nodded in silent agreement, still gazing at the floor.

Dr Palloa simply made a note.

"The third section is about shared values," he said. "Some things that you both value strongly."

Neither Elphaba or Fiyero had to think very hard about their most important value. What mattered most to them.

"Family," they said in unison.

Fiyero lifted his head and looked to his wife, his shoulders easing and a smile flickering across his face.

"Family," he repeated.

He addressed Dr Palloa. "I'm not sure how to word this exactly, but… choice? The way we both grew up… we didn't have a lot of that. We both thought we knew exactly how our lives would turn out. It's important to both of us that our kids have that."

"Do you agree with that, Elphaba?"

Elphaba nodded. "I do. And safety."

Both Peacock and Fiyero looked to her.

"Safety," she repeated. "For the third."

Fiyero thought she was referring to keeping their children safe, and agreed.

"Excellent," Dr Palloa nodded, scribbling away on his pad. "And for the last section, I'd like you to think of a single sentence to explain why you love one another. Take your time. Think carefully."

Fiyero answered first. For him, it was a question he'd asked himself many times during the time Elphaba had been on the run, trying to make sense of his feelings. The answer hadn't changed in a decade.

"I love her-"

"Not to me," Dr Palloa interrupted gently. "Tell Elphaba."

Fiyero turned to Elphaba, reaching for her hands.

"This is going to be longer than a single sentence," he admitted readily and Elphaba chuckled softly.

"Elphaba, I love you because you were the first person to really see me, to see through all my bullshit. Because since that day in the clearing, you made me want to do better. To be better."

"You were the first person to see me too," Elphaba murmured. "To see beyond my skin. You were the first person to put me first. No one had ever done that before. But I don't think the reasons I love you now, are the same as the reasons I fell in love with you ten years ago. And all you've done for the past ten years was try to give me everything I never thought I'd have. Or deserved. That's why I love you."

Chapter Title Song: "Little Moments" by Brad Paisley.

AN. Next chapter is our last flashback chapter. And it's a biggie.

I've sometimes comment about how I'll be writing something in a fic, and then something similar happens in real life. And it's happened again- I was literally writing about a royal wedding (you'll see why soon) last night when Prince Harry's engagement was announced. Magic powers? Lol