Chapter 26

On the way home, things were quiet, except for the radio. Even after Dean and Taylor got outside, Taylor hadn't said anything, yet. Dean figured it took her a while, to speak up, again.

Halfway home, Taylor finally asked, "Are you mad at me?"

Dean glanced at his sister, as he held onto the steering wheel, in his left hand. "Why would I be mad at you, Kiddo?"

She hesitated, at first. "B-because I want Sammy instead of you, when I wake up from my bad dreams."

Dean glanced at his rearview mirror, checking behind him, at a car, coming up, close. "I'm not mad, Kiddo."

"You sounded mad."

"I'm not, I promise. Just confused, I guess."

"And, hurt?" she added.

Dean glanced over at her. This kid scared him, sometimes. "Yeah, I guess so."

"I'm sorry," she apologized.

"There's no need for apologies," he shook his head. "I'm glad Sam could be there for ya. I'm glad you want, at least, one of us. It's just…" Was he really about to spill his guts to his twelve-year-old sister?

"What?" she encouraged him, this time.

Dean took a deep breath in, letting it out, as he stared ahead. "Remember I told you, how Dad told me, to look out for Sam, growing up?"

Taylor nodded.

"That's it. I've always been that big brother. Sam was only, the little brother. It was just us. Now, here you are, and Sam's not the youngest anymore. I'm not the only big brother. I have to remember to share that with Sam, and let him, take the reins, sometimes."

"You mean, you got bit by the green-eyed monster?"

Dean stared over at Taylor, confused. "Green-eyed monster?"

"Yeah, a foster mom said, when you get jealous, it means you got bit by the green-eyed monster," she told him.

"Yeah, I guess, you can say something, like that," he smiled at the road, for a brief moment. "The first time you asked for Sam. I don't know. My whole world revolves around being a big brother. I know, Sam isn't doing it, on purpose, nor could he control it. It just felt like he was taking that away from me." Dean wasn't sure why he was, openly, telling all this to Taylor. It just, naturally came out. As if he were talking to himself, out loud.

Taylor was staring at the floorboards. It was a few minutes before she asked, "W-would it help if I told you my secrets?" He could hear the timidness in her tone.

"Honestly, Kiddo, I want you to do what you want. What feels right to you." Dean glanced at his sister, who looked back at him. She looked away, at the floorboards, again. He continued to stare at her, from the corner of his eye, while he kept a look at the road. "Would you like to know something about me, I only told Sam?" Dean saw Taylor lift her gaze, back to him. She nodded. "A long time, ago…"

"In a galaxy, far, far away?" she grinned, as if to be funny.

Dean couldn't help smirk, either. She was, definitely, related to him, all right. "Seriously, though," he continued. "Something happened and Sam died. Stabbed right in the back."

Taylor's smirk, suddenly, vanished. "Then, how is he alive?"

He took another deep breath. "I couldn't live with him, dead. So, I did the stupidest thing and made a deal with a demon. Sam's life for my soul. I got a year to live, just like Dad did for me." Out of the corner of his eye, Dean could see her eyes widen. "Yeah, Kiddo, that's how Dad died. I was dying and the only way to save me, was for Dad to sell his soul, to a demon, too. I'm sorry. I was gonna tell you when you got older."

"At least, Daddy died, a hero," Taylor smiled. It shocked him. Dean was sure she would be pissed at him.

"Yeah, he did. I didn't like it, at first. I thought I shouldn't have come back, that it wasn't natural. But, I ended up, doing the same thing when put in that same position."

"So, what happened? If you only got a year, how come you're alive, now? Is your year not up, yet?"

"No, it happened when you were little," he replied. "Sam tried everything, to find a way to break the contract, without him, dropping dead. In the end, he couldn't. We ran out of time and I was a hellhound's chew toy."

"Hell hound?"

"Basically, the guard dogs of hell, literally," Dean explained, slowing down, at a red light. "You can only see them when your due date has arrived, and they rip you to shreds. Not a pleasant experience. The point is, I ended up, dying. If it weren't for Cas, pulling me, out, I'd still be down there." He stepped on the gas when the light, eventually, changed. His other foot Dean wasn't using, was up, against the door. "What happened to me, down there, sometimes still haunts me, to this day. The only thing that keeps me, going is Sam and Cas, and now, you, of course." He smiled over at his sister, who smiled in return. "Every day, I was hung up, chained, while they sliced and carved at me. Until there was nothing left. Then, by the next day, I would be whole, and they would start in, all over. Up here, it was only four months. Down there, times are different. I spent thirty years, being tortured. Thirty years, I endured pain, no one could ever imagine. While this one, son of a bitch offered me, to get off and inflict it onto the other souls."

Taylor wiped at her eyes, on her arm, sniffing in. "B-but, you didn't, right?"

"I wish I could say, otherwise, but…" Dean paused, taking a deep breath. "I held on for thirty years, longer than anyone would have. Then one, day, I took his offer and I got off that rack. All that pain I was feeling, inside me, I unleashed on those poor bastards. For a long time, after Cas brought me, back, I… I couldn't even look at myself. I didn't want to feel anything. What I did, Kiddo, I wish I could take, back. Those faces still haunts me. Once I told Sam, what I was holding inside, I was able to move past it. It doesn't change things, or anything. And, like I said, I still think about it, sometimes. That's why I hunt. I try to make up for the things I did. We all make mistakes. We all cave in, into our feelings. We can't let what happened to us, control us. We're only human, Kiddo. I don't know why things happen. What I do know is, we can either bounce back or let it keep us, down." Dean looked over at Taylor, who was staring at the floorboards. A tear was sliding down her cheek. He reached over and caught it, wiping the tear away.

"I wish I couldn't feel, sometimes," Taylor admitted, out of nowhere.

"Humans feel, Kiddo. It's a part of life. We can either let pain make us, stronger, or break us, down. It's your choice. But, you can't hold onto it. You can't let it, boil up, inside of you. I know you lashed out at Sam, and those foster people, because of the pain you feel inside. But, you can't give into it. Fight and let go. Just like what Elsa was singing about, but, you gotta let someone in. Let one or all of us help you. No one knows but you, Kiddo. We can't read your mind. I get you may be afraid we won't believe you, or something. I can tell ya, Sam and I will. But, even if you want to tell Emily, or Mindy, or Helen, even. I don't care. As long as you tell someone." Dean lowered his voice. He was switching between the road and Taylor. "Don't make the same mistakes that I made, Kiddo. I don't want to see my baby sister fall apart, the way I did. I care about you, too much, for that to happen."

Things were quiet for a moment, as the siblings sat there. Finally, it was Taylor who broke the silence, with a sniff. "Can…" She hesitated. "I want to."

"I'm here, whenever you're ready, Kiddo. Or, you can wait and tell Sam, when you're ready. You have other people who would be there, for you, I'm sure. Hell, you can call Cas or Jody, if you wanted to."

Another tear fell as Taylor, suddenly, started, out of nowhere. "They came every day."

Dean glanced over at her. "Who came every day?"

But, she shook her head. "The hits," Taylor's chest was starting to heave, as her voice broke. She kept her head, down. "Sometimes, out of nowhere. I-I-I had…. t-to wake up before them, so it wouldn't of made them, madder. It was my job to start the coffee maker. It had to be ready by the time, Greg woke up or I'd get it. All day, while they worked, I had to keep the house clean. If something w-was out of p-place when they got home, they would shove me into the wall, and beat me until I couldn't stand." Tears were now pouring down, both sides of her face, as Taylor finally opened up. Dean had not been prepared for it to happen, right there and now. But, he remained silent, letting Taylor have the spotlight.

She sniffed in. "Greg and Amy didn't drink beer, only wine. A lot of it, though. I would have to serve their guests when they threw fancy dinners. Amy would force me into a dress, so I would look nice and not like a slob. Even though I'd tell her, I didn't like them, because of Matt. He would do the same, and then look at me, weird. Then, one night, after Greg had fallen asleep. He woke up, still drunk, He would climb into my bed, on top of me, like Matt did. But, he never really did anything, not like Matt. Not at first, anyway. Every night, he would wipe his finger across my face and kiss my neck, telling me, how he read my file, about what Matt did, and how he had good taste. I would try to fight him off, but, he was t-too strong. S-sometimes, I would try to bite him, off. He would hit me, across the face, if I did. Call me, horrible names."

Taylor started gasping for breath, which Dean reached over to touch her hand, that was on the seat, telling her, to take deep breaths. The anger inside of him, was rising as Dean listened to his sister's cries, his heart shattering into millions of pieces, for her. He couldn't believe it happened more than once.

"For a whole year, Greg would come into my room, and each time, he touched me, until he got further down. Then, one night, he started pulling on my pajamas and...and...and...he...he...he...he did it! I screamed for help, but Amy never came to stop it. I tried to bite, scratch, hit. Anything for the pain to stop! I just...w-wanted...the... p-p-p-pain...t-t-t-to stop, Dean!" Taylor picked up her knees, to bury her face in her arms, on top of them, as she cried the hardest he had ever seen her cry, coughing on a few sobs, here and there.

Dean had finally pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex. He put the gear in park and shut off the car, before turning to his sister, pulling her in. The second she felt her brother take her, into his arms, Taylor jumped on him, squeezing the guy in a strong embrace. She cried into his neck.

"I got ya, Kiddo. I got ya. Let it out. Let it all out." Dean held his arms around his sister, protectively. He held a hand to the back of her head. Taylor managed to get more out.

"I t-t-told Amy, but, she called me, a liar, that I wasn't pretty enough for anyone to do that, and that Greg would never ch-cheat on her. Then, she...she...she...she beat me for telling lies and held my head under the water, in the kitchen sink. I never tried t-to stop her. I hoped I would drown. I even t-tried to swallow some of the water, but she shoved me, across the room and t-told me to get out of her sight. "

At that point, a lone tear fell from Dean's eye, as he held onto his baby sister. "I'm so sorry, Kiddo. I am so sorry. We would have been there, to stop it, if we knew." Taylor was almost choking Dean. Even if she was, he didn't care. With the last part, the sobs turned back, to full blast, once again, as she sobbed, uncontrollably, on his shoulder. The next thing Dean knew, he was repeating what he heard on that Lifetime movie, only upping it. "You're a great kid. You're a great kid. You're a great kid. You're a great kid." He was sure passersbys could hear her sobs, coming from inside the car. Neither of them seemed to care. Dean just let Taylor, cry, for as long as she needed.

Dean held onto his sister until she was able to settle down, and got out, to head up to their apartment. As they walked, he held an arm around her, as Taylor leaned against him. After crying so much, it had taken a lot out of her, and the siblings spent the afternoon, taking a nap, until Sam got home.

"Dean? Taylor?" he called as he walked inside, closing the door, behind him. He had tried to call, on the way home, but, no one answered. Sam ended up, finding both of them, curled up, on Dean's bed. Neither one hadn't even removed their shoes. He, at least, removed Taylor's, tossing them, over on the floor and left them, be.

Another hour went by, before Taylor was the first to wake up. Even though Sam thought he had the TV volume low enough, she still heard it. He looked over, in time, to see her coming towards him, rubbing her eye.

"Hey, Buddy." Sam held an arm out, inviting his sister to sit with him. Taylor sat, and laid her head against Sam's side. "How'd it go, this morning? Did you have a good session?"

She nodded, watching the show Sam had on. It was some show, on the Discovery Channel, about space.

Sam kissed the top of her forehead, noticing how tired Taylor still looked. "Did you and Dean sleep the rest of the day or something?"

Again, she nodded. Taylor picked her foot up, folding it in. The bottom part of her shorts fell, uncovering her leg. That time, she didn't try to recover it, and Sam saw several burn scars, along the top of her thigh.

He looked alarmed. "Buddy, what happened?"

Taylor looked at what he was staring at. She remained silent, at first.

Sam examined them, closer, using the light from his phone's screen. The burns were small and round. They weren't cigarettes, they were too big. Maybe, cigars?

Dean was the next one to wake up, coming out to the living room. He scratched the top of his back, reaching behind, under his shirts. "How was work?"

But, Sam was too focused on their sister. "Dean, have you seen these?"

"Seen what?"

He showed Dean, the burn scars, holding onto Taylor's knee. Dean moved closer, leaning a hand on the back of the couch.

"Holy crap," Dean blurted out. "Did Greg do that, too? Or, was it Amy?"

Taylor was laying against the back of the couch. It didn't seem like she had any strength to care, at that point, still wanting to sleep. "Greg would make me, sit next to him, while he smoked his cigar."

Dean dropped onto the couch, behind her, wiping the same hand down his face. How much more abuse had Taylor not mentioned, were there?

"Wait, I thought Mindy took you to an urgent care when she picked you up, from our place?" Sam reminded Taylor, confused.

"I didn't want to take off my jeans, when the doctor wanted to look me over. So, they never saw them," she murmured.

Dean rubbed a hand, up and down her ribs. "Taylor told me, everything, today, on the way home," he told their brother.

Sam's mouth hung, open. "Really?" He had wanted to have been there when Taylor was ready to share.

Dean nodded. "I told her about being down, in hell, and it was enough for Taylor to open up, to me." He looked down at their sister. "Matt wasn't the only one." Dean looked up, to look over at Sam.

Sam swallowed, having trouble. "You mean…?"

He nodded.

Sam dropped his face, in his hands, rubbing them against it, before running his hands through his hair.

"Also, I think I know who's been starting the coffee when we get up."

"I know," he said. "I asked Taylor, if she's been doing it. She wanted to tell me, why, but, couldn't."

"She was beaten, every day, while she stayed there."

"Not every day I was there." Taylor admitted. "It got worse after the demons came, but, they stopped after he found me."

"Who found you, Bud?"

Taylor shrugged. "Never said his name. He sounded like he went to Hogwarts."

"Hogwarts?" Dean questioned. Then, it hit him, causing him and Sam to exchange looks between each other.

"He made them stop, and told them not to touch me, anymore. They ignored him, after he left."

"Taylor, did this guy…." Sam glanced over at Dean, looking back at his sister. "Was he, kind of pudgy. Beard. A little shorter than us? And, wears a black suit."

She nodded, against the back of the couch, staring at nothing.

Dean looked at Sam. "That had to have been Crowley," he said.

Sam shrugged. "He did know, an awful lot about Taylor's foster parents, and had even sent those demons there."

"But, what I don't understand is, why did he help Taylor? And, us? Since when does the king of hell care about a kid?"

"I thought the devil was the king of hell," Taylor spoke up.

"Long story, Bud," Sam told her and turned back to Dean. "Guess, it's time to get some answers out of Crowley."

"We should make sure it's a time, Mindy or them, don't show up." Dean pointed out. Even with their sister, opening up, there was still questions rising and needing an answer.

Sam tried to get Taylor, to study for her test, for the next day. Taylor, just wasn't feeling it. She seemed to have been doing good, the last couple of days, after studying all week. Hopefully, that was enough. Dean said, they would try to squeeze in some last minute studying, on the way to school, in the morning. Sam was surprised, but, glad, Dean was helping out, with their sister's education.

Taylor, barely, ate anything, at dinner, and just wanted to go back to bed. She watched a couple episodes on My Little Pony, on her phone, until she fell asleep.