Thank you for showing up every Sunday! I haven't thanked you up here in a while, so thanks!

I promise you that I'm gonna explain more in detail what happened in the last chapter with Derek's hand. As usual, my medical knowledge is based off every writer's best friend Google. I can make it up to you only with Zola's adorableness, I hope you won't mind ;)

Enjoy! I surely did enjoy myself while writing!

Chapter 26

Derek woke up grumpy that morning. It was Meredith's day off and he had wanted to surprise her with breakfast in bed and an already dressed Zola before work, but staying in bed for the rest of the day felt like a more appealing option.

He didn't need to go to work, after all.

He groaned and sighed deeply when he stretched his arm to shut the alarm off, another reminder that he should have been already looking for his clothes to get dressed and go to work.

Meredith stirred and curled into an even tighter ball around him as he stopped the offending sound, sighing when her nose scrunched up and her eyes opened sleepily.

"Shh, it's still early" he mumbled, running a hand through her hair and placing a scratchy kiss on the crown of her head "I forgot the alarm, I'm sorry."

"Hmm" she hummed, smacking her lips with a blissful expression on her face "No work"

"Yeah Mere, no work today" he felt a smile tugging up his lips as she nuzzled her nose in his neck.

Her eyes fluttered open to reveal a mischievous glint "It's early"

"Is it?" he smiled, feeling a little of the weight of the morning lift from his shoulders as she kissed his morning stubble.

"Zo won't be up in a while, hopefully" she grinned, rolling on her back and bringing him with her.

He hovered over body mindful of her bump, staring at her face for a moment, just taking in her heavy-lidded eyes, the hair framing her face like a halo, her body warm and soft and fitting in between his hollow spaces despite the growing roundness of her stomach.

"You can get a few more hours of sleep, you know" he smirked, capturing her lips.

"Not worth missing this" she grinned into his kiss, before lacing her hands behind his neck and kissing him back. "I have to pee first though" she giggled as she pulled away and Derek grinned.

He let her untangle from his hold and fell in a heap on the bed, her warmth slipping away as she scrambled to the bathroom, leaving the door ajar.

His smile died on his lips.

He let his thoughts drift for a moment to the meeting he had had with Owen the day before, after the OR debacle. They were friends, married to the twisted sisters, they knew each others. Yet, Derek felt like he was back in the principal's office as he had sat in what used to be his office and had let Owen yell at him, his head bowed, the shame raising deep and red on his cheeks.

He knew he had been a fool, that he could have jeopardized his whole career, that he was a reckless surgeon for going in the OR without a one-hundred percent chance certainty of his abilities post surgery, but Owen understood.

He gave him a day off when Derek mentioned that Meredith wasn't working as well, no fuss, no reward. He wasn't on probation, he wasn't banned from the OR, he simply had to think about his life and his career and his wrist, then get back to work if Callie thought he could work ever again.

"Derek" Meredith called out softly from the bathroom, but with a certain urgency to it. He was immediately alert and out of his musing.

"What is it?" he scrambled out of bed and pushed the door open, revealing Meredith standing in awe in front of their mirror, with her hands placed reverentially under her bare, exposed stomach, her shirt rolled under her breasts and her lips stretching in a small grin.

"Look!" she said simply, running her hand on her stomach and turning sideways.

Derek smiled widely when he noticed how pronounced was the swell now, a clearly round, defined curve that jutted out of Meredith and made her look like a goddess.

"Bird is definitely growing" he grinned widely, closing the distance between them in two strides and placing his hand right above Meredith's and whispering "Hi baby," and the baby kicked in response.

Meredith leaned her back against his chest and there they stood, looking at each other through the bathroom mirror and cradling her stomach gently, their cheeks touching, their bodies connected in every inch.

Meredith sighed, when her eyes caught sight of the black protective sleeve on their cabinet "Have you thought about what happened yesterday in the OR?"

"Mer -" he took a deep breath and she turned to face him, holding his hands in place.

"Have you?" she prodded and he gave in. At his nod, she continued "And?"

He took a deep breath, bracing himself for the talk that the simple syllable brought on.

"What if can't be a surgeon anymore?" he blurted "What should I do? We have two kids to raise Mere, I need to bring the bacon home, I can't leave all the work to you and -"

"Shh, stop right there" she smiled encouragingly, her hand cupping his cheek, her thumb brushing lovingly his stubble "I know we are going to have two kids, believe me, it's feeling every day more real as Bird grows, but I can still work. I want to work" she emphasized "And you can still be a doctor, Derek"

"What if I can't operate again?"

"Then you'll open a private practice and become a neurologist. It's not ideal, but it's still better than nothing" she suggested.

"I hated the private practice I had in New York." he stated roughly, avoiding her gaze.

"Then you'll teach. I'm sure all those horny medical school girls would be overjoyed to have such a hot, charming professor." she grinned, her eyes turning a shade darker.

"Mer, I'm serious. This is serious." He shook his head, looking down at his feet but finding Meredith's stomach in between them.

"So am I" she replied softly, pulling up his chin and forcing his stare up "You are a good teacher, the kids will love you."

"I can stay at home until Zola and Bird are in school, be their Daddy" his frown morphed into a gentle smile.

"Oh Derek" Meredith sighed, tiny tears filling her eyes as she cupped his face in her hands, touched by his sweetness "You are a great Daddy already, you can still work and be an awesome Daddy"

"That's the only appealing option right now" he sighed, his hands finding Meredith's stomach for a loving rub.

"What about another surgery?"

"I think I should talk to Callie again about all the options. Yesterday we simply discussed a couple of things, maybe the tests we did showed something different."

Meredith studied his hesitancy, the sadness buried into his gaze, and she knew she had to do something about it. "Derek, there are less than thirty people in the world that can do a job as good as yours. You are probably the only one on the West Coast. The only one." Meredith pressed, an encouraging smile on her lips "You are a surgeon"

He sighed and locked eyes with Meredith, before kissing her softly. She smiled gently and then the same glint in the eyes she had before her bathroom break returned in full force.

She kissed him back passionately, eager to continue what they had started back in the bed, even though they knew they needed to talk more about this issue. Meredith knew he needed this as much as he needed to get the sour feeling of not being enough out of his chest. She made him feel like he was enough.

Derek wrapped his arms around Meredith's torso and walked her backwards towards their bed, letting her sit gently on the rumpled comforter and watching as her lips stretched in a soft smile.

They could definitely talk later.

He was about to take off his shirt and lay Meredith fully on her back when they heard the door-handle jingle. They immediately recomposed themselves, sitting up straighter before the door could open, revealing their daughter's sleepy form.

Zola was barefoot and one leg of her lavender pajama was lifted over her knee, crumpling the white polka dots printed on it. She was holding tightly her stuffed lion while she rubbed her eyes with her free hand, her braids were loose and unkempt and her usual smile hidden behind an uncertain, sleepy expression.

"Mama" she mumbled in a small voice.

"Hey ZoZo," Meredith smiled softly, untangling from Derek with an apologetic look "What is it? Did you have a bad dream?"

Zola shook her head dramatically, tightening her grip on the lion almost to brace herself for the confession. "Pee pee in da bed, Mama"

Meredith let out a soft, encouraging smile as she saw the disappointment in the girl's features. They had been trying to potty-train her for a few days and it had been the first night they had proudly put her in a pull-up diaper for the night, after Zola had gone a whole day without accidents. They weren't expecting her to stay dry, but it was worth a shot.

Meredith smiled softly at Derek, then stood up and held out her hand for Zola to take "Let's go change"

"Sorry" Zola mumbled with so much sorrow that Meredith wanted to pull her so close that she'd never let go.

"Hey," she stopped right at the threshold of their door, smiling sweetly as Zola looked at her with sleepy eyes "Accidents happen; you had your pull-up on, it's okay."

"We don't mind it" Derek smiled from his position on the bed, and Zola's features relaxed considerably.

When Meredith held out her hand again, Zola grabbed it promptly and shuffled out to her room beside her mother, the lion dangling barely above the floor in her other hand as she held it from one of its paws. Derek watched their silhouettes disappear out in the hall and smiled proudly between himself.

Meredith picked up a fresh pair of panties while they migrated to the bathroom, then stripped Zola out of her pajama pants. "See baby, still dry" she smiled sweetly, showing her the garment.

"Oh" Zola frowned.

"Do you want to go potty again?" Meredith asked as Zola pulled down swiftly the diaper with her free hand and nodded.

"There we go, then"

She holstered Zola up on the toilet seat, holding the stuffed lion for her, and saw her little girl sigh in relief when a tinkling sound broke their quiet.

"Good job Zo" she encouraged and Zola finally broke out in a smile.

She held out the fresh panties and Zola grabbed them eagerly, easily figuring out where she had to put her legs, then she pulled them up quickly and grinned.

"Up!"

"Come here, let's put the pants back on" Meredith giggled as she crouched in front of Zola who re-appropriated herself of the lion and let Meredith help with the pants. Meredith kissed the top of her head and Zola was quick to swing her arms around her neck for a hug.

"Do you want to cuddle for a while?" Meredith asked softly "It's still early to be up, and Mommy and Daddy are home today."

Zola nodded and Meredith picked her up in her arms with a slight effort. Zola wrapped her legs around her and sighed sleepily as Meredith walked back to the master bedroom, where Derek was already dressing up for the day. Meredith sat on the edge of the bed and in a moment, Zola was hiding her face on Meredith's chest, her body flush under Meredith's armpit as she held her close and Derek sat on the other side, rubbing Zola's back with his bigger hand.

"Are you still sleepy?" Derek asked gently with a smile. Zola shook her head but gripped Meredith's t-shirt in her fist and breathed in her soapy smell.

They sat there in silence together for a few minutes, only Zola didn't fall back to sleep. She shifted to rest her head on what was left of Meredith's lap, looking up at her mother smiling, her ear next to Meredith's stomach. She wrapped her arm around the bump, a content smile on her lips, then she let out a startled "Oh" when the baby kicked, then giggled when the following kick tickled her.

"This is your sibling moving inside Mama, just like we read in the book about being big sisters" Derek smiled widely "It's pretty funny, right?" he continued, watching as Zola stared mesmerized at Meredith's stomach "Mama says it feels like the wings of a bird"

"Chirp chirp!" Zola mimicked, making her parents smile widely.

"Our baby Bird doesn't chirp" Meredith added playfully, and Zola giggled endlessly as Meredith grabbed her tinier hand and tracked the movement of the baby inside her.

"Day day baby Bid!" Zola grinned, smacking a sloppy kiss over the cottony fabric of the t-shirt.

"Oh Zola," Meredith sighed, pulling her closer and leaving a proud kiss on top of her head, trying to hide the tiny hormonal tears building up in her eyes.

"Why don't we go to the aquarium together today?" Derek suddenly proposed, his smile doubling as he watched Zola's face lit up.

"Fwishies?" Zola piped up with her usual excitement.

"We can see a lot of fishes, yeah" Derek grinned "Even the octopus or sharks" he added and Zola's eyes widened.

"Let's go then" Meredith grinned, basking in the excitement of their little girl.

They had breakfast together and Derek's mood improved tenfold as he tried to explain to an over-excited Zola what they would see at the aquarium.

They took the ferry there, since the aquarium was located on the waterfront, and Zola kept babbling their ears off as she tried to discuss the qualities of all the marine creatures Derek had listed her.

While Derek bought the tickets, Meredith and Zola waited for him sitting on a bench in the main hall and the little girl was already fascinated by the building.

She kept pointing out to things around them while shouting "Mama, 'ook!", her smile contagious as Meredith tried to explain to her every single object her eyes landed on. It was tiring having a toddler, but when they could enjoy her like this it was more than fun.

"Okay, Miss Zola" Derek grinned when he came back with the tickets, but Zola had already jumped off the bench.

"First of all," Meredith stood up as well, her stern face on "No running away from us, alright? You can't run at all in here"

Zola nodded, looking up trustingly at her mother.

"Secondly, no getting too close to the displays" Derek added

"Lastly, we follow the directions" Meredith grinned, showing to Zola the arrows who guided them through the display.

"Where do we go now?" Derek asked Zola with a smile, and she pointed him to the big arrow on the wall. "Let's go then!"

Zola grabbed his hand swiftly and dragged him towards the first display of local fishes. Meredith trailed behind a little and watched the silhouettes of her two favorite people in the crowd, their dark hair standing out, just like Zola's green sweater.

They quickly passed through the display of the Pacific Ocean fauna, the excitement growing as the tropical tank neared and the colors brightened. Zola stared in awe as she toddled around with energy, her little feet carrying her around to explore the place as Derek alternated with Meredith in reading the tags for the fishes. They had fun pointing out each species together or letting Zola guess where every fish was hiding.

"My shrink had the same fishes in a tank in her office" Meredith commented in a whisper to Derek in the first moment of quiet, as they watched Zola's mesmerized gaze.

"Dr. Wyatt?" he looked up at her with a strange expression, a frown mixing with wonder and curiosity.

"Yeah. I stared at them for my first three sessions" she giggled, but the reminiscing was cut short abruptly when Zola wanted to see what was in the next display.

Zola stopped dead in her tracks though and almost burst into tears when they reached the shark tank. She demanded in a very toddler-like fashion to be held in Derek's arms, burying her face in the crook of his neck as she mumbled "'cary"

"They are not going to hurt you here, Lovebug" Meredith smiled, standing closer to them and trying to reassure her.

"Daddy will keep you safe" Derek added, kissing the top of her head.

Zola nodded uncertainly, so they were quick to leave the room and go see the octopuses. There Zola found her smile again.

"What's so funny?" Meredith questioned her, wanting to enjoy the toddler's perspective on things. So far, they had had a ball in hearing her point of view.

"Silly fwishies!" Zola giggled madly, doubling over in laughter as she tapped on the glass and the octopus moved with her fingers.

She laughed and laughed and laughed, and Meredith and Derek felt the warmth of her happiness fill their hearts.

The last room they visited was the dome with a display of the Caribbean Sea species; Zola went wild when she could see only water and fishes around her. Her eyes were so wide, her smile so bright that Derek immediately leaned closer to Meredith and whispered in her ear "When are we going to take the kids here again?"

He smiled as his hands wrapped around Meredith's stomach and they watched together Zola twirl in the middle of the dome, the fishes becoming a blur as she twirled and twirled in-between the crowd.

"Do you think we should look around for dance classes?" Meredith smirked, seeing Zola's excitement. "I know that walking is already a milestone, but maybe we can push our luck"

"I don't think she can start for real before she's three or four. At least for ballet" he shrugged, his smile not hiding his feelings at the true miracle that was Zola.

"How do you even know that?" Meredith giggled, still amazed sometimes by her husband's knowledge of these very girly topics.

"Four sisters. Nine nieces" he winked, then asked "What about rhythmic gymnastics?"

At that, Meredith burst into laughter.

When Zola was tired of the dome, she was definitely in need of a nap. They decided to stay at the waterfront for lunch, then go back home in the hope that Zola would fall asleep in the car.

They stopped at a small café for sandwiches and sat at a table outside, despite the chilly breeze. They split three sandwiches, giving Zola her own bite-sized and sharing the other two, listening again to Zola chat about the experience in as many words she could remember. Derek sometimes helped her out with vocabulary, while Meredith prompted her with questions and kept the conversation going. Zola might not make full sentences yet, but she was pretty entertaining for her parents' standards.

For a moment, the two adults looked at each other and grinned, feeling blessed and happy for the simple fact that they were there, all together.

Derek's ringtone interrupted the moment and Zola sighed poignantly at the holdup, as Derek answered.

"Hey Callie" he mumbled and his face fell.

Zola was eager to start talking to Meredith again, but Meredith managed to keep her quiet for a little longer.

"I have seen the scans you did yesterday myself," Derek spoke again, then paused, listening to the voice on the other side "I told you don't want another surgery"

Meredith blinked, focusing on the half of the conversation she could hear more closely. She was aware that they were probably bringing up the mandatory exam Owen had forced on Derek after the OR debacle, but she couldn't hear Callie's side of things.

"What do you mean maybe physical therapy will solve this? It means you cleared me too soon!" he spat, his voice raising and even Zola stopped eating, upset that her Daddy was being so harsh after being wonderful and charming all morning.

"After New Year's?" his eyes widened, and he gulped "Alright, tomorrow. See you."

When he finished the call his eyes met Meredith's and she could see the sadness buried there.

"Was that Callie?" Meredith asked, and he simply nodded.

"Can we go home, now?" he brushed off, starting to gather the mess of napkins they were using.

Meredith nodded and decided that it was not the time to pry anymore. She followed him silently to the car, the excitement of the family outing suddenly vanishing.

The ferry ride was quiet, but it gave Zola the chance to fall asleep as predicted. The drive home became tense and filled with unspoken questions. Meredith respected his need to process things and focused her attention on their child moving within her, tracking movements and counting kicks, once in a while glancing at Derek to see if he was at his breaking point.

She didn't see tears in his eyes until he had carried Zola to bed and came back to the living room, where she was sitting on the couch, flipping through a magazine and waiting for him.

"I can't operate until New Year's at best, Callie said" he blurted, still standing awkwardly in front of her "She suggested a more intense physical therapy and time off from the hospital, maybe take up a hobby, do something I like."

"Oh." Meredith sighed without much words to add, reaching out for his hand and squeezing it.

He fell in a heap in the space next to her on the couch, elbows on his knees, looking utterly defeated. Meredith's hand was now rubbing his back in a soothing up and down motion, waiting for him to explain more.

"She reviewed the scans and saw that the nerves are intact, but they still haven't healed properly. My nerves were already overused before the crash compared to a standard patient because of the job and now they need more time to heal completely"

"Still, they can heal" Meredith smiled encouragingly.

"They would be healed if I were a salesman!" Derek spat and looked away, unable to share a gaze with her.

"Did Callie mention another surgery? Maybe there's something -"

"It's too risky and probably pointless. I prefer having two hands and not being a surgeon instead of having only one functioning properly" he said resolutely, and she didn't question him at all. "I'll talk to Owen about time off"

He was ready to bolt, but Meredith kept him still. They were silent for a minute, a minute that stretched for what felt like hours. Clearly, Callie had been right that his nerves were healed, just not for the standards a neurosurgeon required. It drove Derek crazy, to know that he was healthy, but he might never operate again.

"Are you going to stay with Zola for a while or you want to do something else with your time off?" Meredith asked carefully, wishing it wasn't too soon for him to be making these kind of decisions.

"We could take a holiday together, go someplace warm and exotic" he relaxed at the mere thought, finally turning to look at her with a little less despair in his eyes.

She smiled sympathetically, running her hand through his hair "Derek, I'm almost five months pregnant, there's no getting on planes for me, even if I wasn't scared out of my mind."

"We could go somewhere by car" he fueled

"We should stop every half hour, because between me and Zola that's how often we pee" she smiled and at that he cracked a smile too. "What about the University of Washington offer?"

"Teaching a tutor-like class on neurosurgery for a semester to undergrads?" he frowned, recalling a memory he had unconsciously buried.

"Yeah, that one. You were great today with Zola, pointing out fishes and sharks, she loved it. Heck, I was hot for teacher in my day" she grinned widely, and he managed a chuckle.

"You think I should consider it?"

"I think you should"

She kissed him -soft and quick like a habit- then smiled at him, trying to reassure him and encourage him to take a different road than the one in their plans.

His smile wasn't wide or happy, but at least he smiled back.

Okay, one little thing I want to point out. I know that a neurosurgeon and a neurologist are not the same thing, I believe Derek would need to do some things in order to become a neurologist, but he's surely on the right track. This is fiction, it's not really accurate, even if I try my best to make it as much realistic as possible.

Derek promised they'd go to the aquarium someday, didn't he? I hope Zola was adorable enough to make up for the little lack of her in the past chapter.

What do you think is the option Derek should pick? Surgery, stay at home daddy or hot teacher? Stay tuned to find out!